Laments of the Dimension-Stranded ⁽ᴿᵉᵐᵃᵏᵉ⁾

Rainbow planted her rear hooves firmly against the concrete and performed a mighty heave as she the rear bumper. Unfortunately, the steel truck withstood her endeavor and remained stationary.

"I told you, on three," Vincent insisted. "It's in neutral; this won't be too hard if we push at the same time."

"Holy haystacks, this thing is heavy!" She paused to breathe and sweep aside her colorful bangs, then nodded to indicate she was ready. She braced herself and reassumed her position.

"One, two, three!"

With a grunt of exertion, she shoved the bumper. In synchrony, their substantial combined strength budged the huge vehicle. As the wheels rotated, its gathering momentum aided their efforts. When the rear bumper passed the auto shop's metal sliding garage door, Rainbow removed her hooves, relaxed, and released an unabashed weary sigh.

"Nice job." Vincent sighed and wiped his brow with the rear of his hand. "Head to the driver's seat. The key's in the ignition. I'll give you the signal." The engine of the car he had plundered from the soldiers ticked over nearby, and its battery was connected to his truck’s battery with crocodile clips. He stepped into the driver's compartment and depressed the stolen car's accelerator to rev the engine. It was securely parked, so the vehicle remained immobile throughout the process. Electricity soared through the wires to, in theory, provide the truck with just enough juice to start once. "Go ahead, start it now!"

Compared to the abandoned vehicles parked outside of the auto shop, the pickup's proportions were ludicrous. The step to climb into the driver's seat was so high off of the ground, Rainbow elected to jump into the seat instead. She hesitated for a moment and looked around in awe. The interior of the vehicle was incomprehensibly complex. Many buttons, levers and mirrors everywhere.

She reached beneath the steering wheel where she had been instructed to look and rotated the key in the ignition. The engine sputtered momentarily before it erupted with a furious roar that made her jump in fright. The chassis vibrated so aggressively she felt her body gently quiver. The vehicle's barely restrained power was intimidating.

Vincent cackled. He leapt from the stolen car and pumped his arm into the air in victory. "It's alive! It’s alive! Now I know what it feels like to be God!"

Rainbow grinned enthusiastically and leapt out of the driver’s seat, hopping onto the pavement below. "It's a real monster, alright!"

"Okay! One more check; I'm going to make sure everything’s running smoothly." Vincent crawled beneath the pickup, tools in hand. When he reemerged, his white shirt and hands were splattered with black oil and possibly gasoline.

She shuddered in disgust. "What the heck were you doing under there?"

He shot her a thumbs up.

"So, that means we’re good? Can we go?"

"Well, in my professional opinion, I say this with confidence: I have no fucking idea. This pickup was sitting unattended for God-knows-how-long. Best we can do is cross our fingers and hope nothing vital fails." He wiped his hands on a rag, then unclamped the crocodile clips from the truck’s battery and tossed them haphazardly away, their purpose fulfilled. He slammed the hood shut, then jogged into the workshop beneath the lifted sliding door one final time.

While she waited for her companion to return, she leapt onto the passenger's seat, sat on her haunches, and shut the door. She tapped her hooves against the hard dashboard to create a little rhythm.

When Vincent returned and climbed into the driver's seat, she noticed he wore new clothes. His wiry frame made the scavenged yellow-greenish military uniform and combat helmet he donned appear heavy, slightly baggy, and uncomfortable. The salvaged clothing had more pockets and was tougher, which provided more protection. Though macabre, it was also, indisputably, a logical decision. Rainbow refused to acknowledge it or consider the implications. The very concept of making progress toward escaping Nowhere and returning home was exhilarating, and she didn't want to ruin the moment.

"You're wearing those again? With the chain? What are they?"

He brushed his fingers against his dog tags. "Yeah. These are my old tags, the ones I wore back in the day when I was still in service. One's got my name printed there. Other information, too."

"Real fancy." She reclined in her seat and gazed through the windshield. Fortunately, after she adjusted the passenger seat to its maximum elevation, she could comfortably see through the windshield to the ground below.

“The Initiator is roomy, right? Comfortable?” He adjusted his seat slightly.

Her eyes flicked over at him, and she firmly shook her head. “I don't care how many times you say it, you aren't convincing me that isn't a dumb name."

“Hey, every cool car has to have a cool driver and a fittingly cool name.” He raised his hand and counted with individual fingers. “Max Rockatansky’s Interceptor. Doc’ Brown’s ‘81 DeLorean. Frank Bullitt’s ‘68 Mustang.”

“The 'Interceptor’ sounds pretty cool, actually,” she conceded. “But this thing is silver. Silver isn’t a cool color. It barely even counts as a color, actually.”

“Firstly, it's steel, not silver, and secondly, we’re sticking with my idea and you’re gonna shut up, how about that?"

"How about I think you like this big thing because you’re compensating?” Rainbow smirked briefly to express she joked. "So, will it be fine in the grass? There's no roads."

"Roads?" He plucked a pair of black-tinted sunglasses from the dashboard and flicked them open, then fitted them over his eyes. "Where we're going, we don't need roads.” He snapped his fingers and pointed in her general direction. “Alright, click it or ticket."

“What?” She looked around, though she was unsure exactly what to search for.

He waved his hand dismissively. “Ah, fuck it, whatever. You don't need a seatbelt. I’m a good driver. ” He motioned to the center console behind the gearshift. “Open that up. Pull the little handle. The CD cases. Yeah, those, the plastic squares, grab me a few.” When he was passed the stacks of cases, he flipped through them effortlessly as if he knew precisely what he searched for. “Perfect.” He tapped the cover of a plastic case and, with a finger, traced a lightning bolt that soared across a dark patch of clouds.

Rainbow leaned over the gearshift and squinted as she struggled to read the small font printed on the case he had selected. "What's Thin Liz—"

"You'll see." He inserted the CD into its designated slot in the dashboard and spun a dial to select a specific song on the album. He shifted into reverse, rotated the steering wheel, and reversed the Initiator until its beautiful steel hood pointed north. He shifted into drive, and the engine purred eagerly in response.

A riff of harsh, grating electric guitars sounded loudly through the pickup’s sound system. Rainbow winced. For the first initial few seconds, she considered the noise barely tolerable. Then the rhythmic drums kicked into gear. A squealing high note made her ears flop painfully.

"Felt a chill on my backbone," he sung along with the male vocalist as he rested the sole of his trail boot lightly over the truck's accelerator pedal. He hesitated as he patiently waited for the ideal moment, with his toe tapping to the beat, then slammed the gas. The pickup’s tires screeched against the pavement briefly before they caught and launched the truck across the parking lot at a ludicrous speed. Rainbow yelped and clutched her seat in horror.

The truck rocketed off of the pavement, landed onto the ramp with a thump, and accelerated the entire way down like they descended the apex of the world's fastest, most insane, most unregulated and lawsuit-prone roller coaster. Vincent whooped and hollered insanely, tilting his head and arching his back. "Stone cold sweat!” he sang along gleefully.

When the Initiator struck the hill at the base of the ramp, it launched upward with a surging VRROOOMM!, sailed through the air magnificently, and collided with the ground with a deafening CRASH!. The truck rattled loudly as it apparently threatened to violently shatter into pieces, but, fortunately, the superior suspension absorbed some of the force of the impact. Rainbow was launched upward and struck her head hard against the pickup’s solid metal roof, which elicited an unconscious squawk of pain from her throat.

"Cold, cold sweat! Nothing left to lose!" Vincent flicked the steering wheel right briefly before he clamped the wheel at 5 o'clock and whipped it to the left as far as it could rotate. He guided the vehicle so it performed a graceful 180 degree rotation, then he flicked the steering wheel to the right to straighten their trajectory to ensure the truck didn't fishtail. Rainbow was flung against the passenger's door by centrifugal force, and her muzzle smashed against the glass of the window. She moaned, disoriented.

They tore south, going hell-for-leather at a velocity that would make a professional drag racer faint. The truck's wide tires flung up dirt and pebbles as it practically flattened the very earth itself and created grooves in the soil like carriage wheels in fresh wet mud. A massive cloud of dust billowed behind them.

A blistering guitar solo blared from the Initiator's sound system. The pickup’s powerful V8 engine roared in tune with the meritorious solo as Vincent slammed the accelerator. The truck zoomed over another hill and sailed through the air, and electric guitars wailed high notes and screeched beautifully. Like an angel who ascended to heaven, the glorious vehicle had sprouted sacred wings as it sung along in harmony with the melody.

The song concluded with an aggressive pounding of drums. Vincent cackled madly.

"Slow down!!” Rainbow yelped and cringed in terror as they weaved between obstacles and barely avoided head-on collision after head-on collision. Each tree trunk audibly ZOOMED! past as it was narrowly evaded, and the air whipped against the chassis audibly.

“Alright, alright! Keep your pants on.” He tapped lightly on the brake. The Initiator decelerated responsively until they cruised at a comfortable 40 mph.

Gentle chuckles originating from Rainbow evolved into howling laughter. "O-Oh my gosh, t-that was so... awesome!" The adrenaline that swamped her system by the stressful situation was invigorating. As a daredevil at heart, once her expectations had been calibrated, she desperately wanted the ride to be pushed to its absolute limits again.

"Yeah. That one was great, right?" Vincent effortlessly steered with one hand and ejected the CD, then reinserted it into its case. “I guess the manager had good taste in music.”

“Watch where we’re going.”

He balanced glancing upward occasionally to monitor the way ahead and expertly weave the truck between trees, stumps, boulders, and other obstacles in their path with glancing intermittently in her direction to catch her concerned magenta gaze.

“Hey! Watch where we’re going!”

“Relax! Driving in traffic is harder than this. Trees don't move! I could do this with my eyes closed.” Vincent returned both hands to the wheel.

“Rather you didn’t do that, actually. Can I choose a song instead?”

“Pick Elton John. I love his ‘73 album.”

“Nuh-uh, I want to choose.” Rainbow flipped through the CD cases slowly as she appreciated the artwork that adorned each cover. When she reached a blank case, however, she frowned. The plastic was translucent, which allowed her to gaze directly through to the CD inside. “This one’s blank.”

“Yeah, because he burned that one. You should probably just pick another. There could be anything on there."

Curiosity overwhelmed her. Rainbow inserted the CD into the player in the dash and smashed a few buttons as she ignorantly repeated the actions she had watched Vincent perform out of order.

“That’s the eject. No, that one. That one’s play.”

“Why is that the start symbol? It’s just a triangle!"

An acoustic guitar intro and soft vocals, quickly followed by an electric guitar riff and a rhythmic drum accompaniment. It was a departure from the last rock song. Less aggressive, more restrained. “Hey, wait, don’t touch anything. This is 'Take It On the Run'.” Vincent rotated the knob to adjust the volume. He quieted and gripped the steering wheel securely, focused on driving. His other arm drooped. His padded elbow leaned on the center console.

As they neared their destination, he pressed the brake pedal lightly, and with a harsh grinding of wheels against earth, the pickup decelerated and halted. The song concluded with a reiteration of the gentle intro, with a brief acoustic guitar section and a repeat of the intro lyrics.

Rainbow silently reflected on the music she had experienced. The quality was... unexpected, to say the least. "Hey... you guys actually write pretty good music. That was catchy." She hesitated, then glanced out of the passenger's side window. "Why'd we stop? Where are we?"

"I wanted to show this place to you before we move on. Go ahead and take a look. Just stay away from the edge."

She shrugged and nodded in acknowledgement, then opened the door and hopped to the ground below.

The first abnormal quality of the surrounding area she noticed was the jet-black rock that ringed the cliff edge. There was no transition; the earth yielded to rock immediately. It definitely appeared unnatural.

She approached the precipice cautiously to assure she didn't slip, and her mouth dropped agape when she saw beyond the edge. It was an enormous effervescent ocean of opaque, vivid-green sludge that extended as far and wide as her eyes could witness. Huge bubbles inflated, engorged, and burst on the surface, which belched toxic black gas into the atmosphere. The jet-black rim of rock that ringed the sea was uniquely resistant to the corrosive properties of the sludge and, thus, was capable of containing it.

"Whoa." Rainbow kicked a nearby rock over the edge and watched it be absorbed instantaneously.

The driver's side door slammed. Vincent approached from the rear and stepped alongside her. "Yeah. I remember my reaction when I first saw this." He eyed her shocked facial expression and chuckled. "I probably looked a little something like that."

"It's kinda scary. It looks sorta... alive."

"There's scarier stuff out there, trust me. But this is pretty unique, though. I figured we might as well stop, since we were heading in this direction anyway, and we're not coming back here any time soon."

She plucked a single blue feather from her wing and released it. It floated on a gentle breeze and descended into the pool below. The infernal guck absorbed the delicate feather, then spat furiously and emitted bursts of hot green glop like grease from hissing bacon frying on a pan. It disintegrated the morsel instantly, almost hungrily.

Rainbow shivered with great dread and fascination.