My name is Scootaloo. I don’t have a last name, and I probably never will. On this day, I found myself in a kinda strange situation.
I wasn’t exactly sure what I was expecting when I hit the ground.
Pain? Sure, I could take pain. Maybe I would’ve immediately passed out. Loss of consciousness. Best came to best, I would’ve woken up in the Ponyville General hospital in a huge and comfy hospital bed. Maybe even Rainbow Dash would’ve been there, giving me a nice big and delicious ice cream sundae as an I’m sorry, even if she really had nothing to my situation.
Oh, yeah. My situation.
I thought it would be a good idea to go caving. We, being my friends and I, found a huge hole in the ground. A little bit like a crystal mine that you’d find up in Canterlot. I also thought it would be a great idea if I was the one to jump down there. Unfortunately, my wings are blooming a little late, so I find it kinda hard to glide down there. No problem, I just stole a rope from Apple Bloom’s farm. Unfortunately, that rope was actually kind of old, and hanging on the wall not being used for a reason. I jumped, the rope snapped, and because I tied my wings to my back, I’m kind of falling multiple stories. Like- building stories. It has taken me many seconds to fall this far down.
Anyways- I didn’t get any of that. No hospital beds, no ice cream sundaes by Rainbow Dash, and even no pain. Not even the pain! I could’ve handled the pain, even if I shed a few tears.
What I didn’t expect was the noise. It was a noise I kind of wasn’t ready to hear.
It was like the chef back at the home was making a pot full of spaghetti. She would levitate this huge bundle of yellow noodles, raise them over the pot, and then snap them in half, letting them fall into the water. She always made the best spaghetti, even if she was only doing volunteer work. It was either her cooking, or icky oatmeal for dinner.
There was a crunch like the dinner lady had crunched spaghetti. The noise was huge, bouncing off of the walls and echoing for a good long while, no doubt reaching my friends up at the entrance of the cave. The impact on the ground only lasted a split second, but I could’ve sworn I felt my head bounce off of the ground like a basketball. A huge thump specifically around the back of my head. My vision didn’t even go blurry or nothing. Crunch, thump, and it was over.
That was another thing about it, too. The stillness of it all. I hit the ground, made a crunch, and silence. I didn’t kick up any dust, I didn’t see anypony moving, no crying, gasping for air, no voices, just silence. Nothing moved, no pony talked, and nothing else happened for a good long while.
I didn’t really know what to think. Maybe my system was shocked, I dunno. Maybe my emotions just went on the fritz as it tried to deal with whatever had just happened. Maybe what should’ve concerned me more was the fact I didn’t feel any pain. Nothing. I had landed in a way that left my legs crunched into a tight ball. It looked super uncomfortable, but for some reason I didn’t feel that way at all. Not a single red flag was raised- which should’ve been a red flag in itself.
Everything felt kinda sluggish. I couldn’t really move much, but I could move my eyes. I slowly looked up at the entrance of the cave. I’m kind of impressed how far I fell, to be honest. It was a long way down. Up there, being blasted out by the sun directly overhead, were two shadows. I recognized them from anywhere, but right now things were starting to get a little blurry. There was a shout- maybe it was a scream- no doubt from Sweetie Belle, and then it was Apple Bloom who spoke first.
“Scootaloo!” She shouted. “Oh my Celestia! Holy- Sweetie, we have’ta go- ah- ah’m gonna be sick!” Her shadow disappeared from the edge of the cave.
My eyes widened significantly. I’ve heard Apple Bloom scared before. At a lot of our sleep overs, I was usually the one scaring the other two with creepy stories. Nothing too intense, though. Just the usual ghost stories. But this… This was pure, unadulterated fear coming from Apple Bloom. It wasn’t any frilly-scream, it was straight fear.
I flexed my sore jaw, trying to speak. I tried saying something, just to let them know I was okay. Instead, I felt a bubbling sensation in my mouth, like I had just had chocolate syrup or something. I wasn’t exactly sure where it came from, but I suddenly felt the taste of pennies and copper in my mouth all at once. I crossed my eyes, looking down at the ground below me. This strange liquid began pooling out of my mouth, and from the feeling of it, also the back of my head. The puddle began spreading further and further, staining my hooves that didn’t seem to want to cooperate. I watched as the red liquid was wicked up my fur, darkening it and making it look ugly.
I remember the dropping feeling in my gut as I realized that wasn’t any normal red liquid.
That was my blood.
I tried jerking myself up and off of the ground, but only managed to make the liquid pool faster and quicker. I became painfully aware of the fact I couldn’t breathe. Strangely enough, even though I was looking at my blood, I still couldn’t feel a thing in terms of pain. I could feel the stone cold ground, and I could feel the very warm blood spreading across my hooves, and I could even feel my lungs beginning to burn, begging for breath. But I didn’t feel any pain.
I tried looking up again. One more time. But my eyes didn’t feel like cooperating any more. I felt tired. So, so tired. There was another scream- maybe it was both of them this time, I didn’t know. I couldn’t even see my friends anymore.
“Oh my- No- Oh my fucking- oh-”
I couldn’t take it anymore. I know in movies and things, your meant to fight against the sleepiness. But man, it’s much harder than they make it out on screen. I finally let my eyes close.
And then I slipped through the floor.
Do you know when you lift a milk jug out of the fridge, expecting it to be lighter than it actually is? Do you ever lean against a railing you thought was there, but actually wasn’t? You know that weird feeling you get, where you were totally expecting something, and then it wasn’t the way you thought?
Try slipping through the fucking ground.
The ground. The thing everypony walks on every day of their life? The one constant you can always rely on, even in the most dire of times?
I slipped through it.
The puddle of blood slipped around my body, and for a brief moment, I felt like I had become completely covered in this warm liquid. I jerked awake, actually this time, and began trying to grasp onto something. But when I opened my eyes, all I found was the never ending void below the world. At least, that’s what it looked and felt like. The blood seemed to melt away, and I felt the horrible cold sensation of a cold floor spread all across my body.
Although I had slipped through the floor, I still couldn’t breathe. My lungs were burning, and no matter how hard I flailed, swinging my hooves wildly like a timber wolf, I just could not grab anything. I was panicking big time. Although I never got the chance to meet my parents, I would’ve cursed at them for giving me the ability to have panic attacks.
And then, right as I felt like my lungs were going to crumple into a raisin, I hit the ground for the second time that day.
“Omph!”
And unlike last time, I instantly regained control of my limps. I scampered them together, hugging my body tight and covering my head with my hooves. I pushed my chin into the floor, squeezing my eyes as tight as they would go. I could feel my heart beating so fast under me, like it was shaking my entire body. Breathing tasted good, and I was so thankful for having that back.
Like I said, I never got to meet my parents. Total mystery to who they were, but I can at least deduct the fact that one of them had bad anxiety. In times like this where I’m curled up onto the floor, (yes, I’ve curled up on the floor before, shut up) I usually have to force myself to clear my head, and think of something I really like.
Unfortunately, a terrifying thought pushed it’s way in against my will.
Did I… Did I just die? I thought. No… No! I-I’m in the hospital, or something! I breathed harder. My chin twitched in fear as I forced myself to calm down, taking huge and slow breaths. I needed to clear my head. I needed a hero. R-Rainbow Dash. If Rainbow Dash saw me… cowering on the floor. What would she think? What would the Wonderbolts think? I let out a snort. This is so un-cool! I’m cowering on the floor from what? I gotta be Wonderbolts material!
Although I had that running through my head, actually uncowering was another deal all together. I took a few more shaky breaths, and removed my hooves from the top of my head. I wormed them below my chest, and slowly and delicately, pushed myself up into a sitting position. But I did still keep my eyes closed.
My ears twitched as I listened to… nothing. It was quiet. Oddly quiet. No sounds. No movement. No wind. Not even that annoying ringing sound in my ears that keeps me up sometimes. Not even that. It was just the total absence of any and all noise. Which was weird, as in Equestria, something was always happening. Finally, I opened my eyes.
White.
A lot of white.
Infinite white.
It was an impossible space. There were no gradients to define the floor from the wall or the ceiling. It- whatever it was- just kept on going for infinity. It just kept stretching on and on, nonstop for as long as ponily possible. It was even hard to keep my eyes focused on an object, as there was nothing to focus on.
I did find something to focus on, however, in the form of my own hooves. I raised them into my vision, sitting upright on my flank as I observed them. They had been covered in my own blood a few moments prior, but now? Completely clean. Sparkling, even. I’m a yearling filly, okay? I don’t keep my coat as clean as I usually should. I’m outside a lot, running around a bunch, and at the home I can’t usually take a shower unless everypony else is done with theirs for the night. But looking at my own hooves now, in comparison, I looked disgusting.
My hooves look almost blow-dried by Rarity, or something. They’re all super fuzzy and light. My cleanliness continued as I rubbed my hoof through my mane, feeling the purple hairs tickle the bottom of my frog.My mane wasn’t getting bunched up, or caught on anything, or- or anything! It was such a weird feeling, having my body feel this clean.
I let my hooves rest back on the ground. Well- ground here is kind of relative, as the only indication that there is a ground is my flank sitting down on it. It was more of the same white void, and I wasn’t totally convinced that I wasn’t gonna phase right through this one as I did the last. But it was fun. Like- kind of warm, kind of not? Imagine a wedding tent. A cheap wedding tent, with those fake plastic and vinyl windows that people rent out for some reason. When the sun is shining directly on those, it heats up the surface and makes it kind of pleasant to rub your cheek against. It wasn’t soft like a pillow or anything, but- it was a nice warm. I could see myself sleeping here.
If not for wherever the hay here even was.
Finally, I got to my hooves. I didn’t feel the need to stretch, which was slightly strange. But no matter. What mattered right now was finding out where I was. I took one last stabilizing breath before I turned around-
“Gah!” My hooves slipped out from underneath in an attempt to scramble back. “W-Who are you?” I shouted.
Behind me, a good couple of hooves away, was a tall dark green stallion. He wore a light blue tunic with a popper collar, reaching most of the way up his neck. All along the front, reflecting the invisible light, was a dazzling array of medals. They were bronze, silver, and even a few golden ones. It hung like a trophy, making him look a little bit like a general. Or a war hero. Even on his head, covering his dark dray mane, was a sailors hat, except for the addition of the Equestrian flag right in the middle.
He looked down with a gentle smile, which did nothing to alleviate my nerves.
“My name is General Ferdinand Hoof.” He said in a polite, almost Manehattan accent. He tipped his head forwards in a sign of respect. I was confused for a moment. I had arrived in this barren hellscape, only to be politely greeted by a stallion cosplaying as a war general. Needless to say, this was all super confusing.
I came to my senses with a start, scampering back to my hooves and taking a few precious steps away from the stallion.
“Where am I?” I demanded. “I-I was with my friends! Two seconds ago!”
“And you fell.” He added. I didn’t quite get with what he was going with, so I just cocked my head in confusion, raising a hoof in a position ready to run, just in case worst came to worst. I was a tough filly, but this guy looked serious, even with the polite smile.
And to be fair, I almost did run away. Especially when my ears twitched to the sounds of a light popping. There, out of the white, was a clip board, being levitated with zero magical aura. Ferdinand was an Earth-pony, and as far as I could tell, Earth-ponies couldn’t perform magic. Traditional magic, that is. He squinted his eyes, leaning closer to the board, and following his hoof down a line.
“Says here you and your friends were fooling around in the Everfree. Tried going down and into a cave, rope snapped, splat.” He shook his head, unsquinting and leaning back.
“S-Splat?” I shuddered. That… did describe what I felt. A simple splat on the ground.
Then, it dawned on me. I could feel the color drain from my face as I stared aimlessly past Ferdinand.
“Am I… dead?” I asked in an almost whisper. Ferdinand’s face fell a few notches, dipping his hat lower. “N-No. Dead ponies can’t talk. D-Dead ponies are skeletons! A-And zombies!” I felt my throat slowly close in. “No! I-I can’t be dead!”
“You fell four stories and shattered most your bones.” He explained grimly. I felt my lip twitch. I was a strong filly. But apparently not invincible. I automatically began shaking my head, falling to my flank forcefully and rubbing a hoof across my cheeks, wiping up and moisture.
“Y-You’re lying.” I stated simply, sniffling back snot. “You’re lying! I’m not dead! This is some kind of stupid spell! This isn’t a funny prank, Rainbow Dash!” I shouted up, standing irately. My voice didn’t echo back, as there was nothing to echo back from. I fell back onto my flank, defeated. “I-I’m not dead…”
Death was a strange subject for me. Apparently, I had been surrounded by it when I was younger. My parents had dropped me off at my aunt’s place when I was younger. Where they went? I’m not entirely sure. Then, of course as luck would have it, my aunts were plowed over by a loose cart going twenty hooves a second. Orphanage next, and now I’m dead, too. Great. Just great.
“I’m not dead…” I sighed.
Ferdinand stayed silent for a few more moments, watching me as I pitifully wiped away tears.
“I got a story for you, filly.” He finally said. My ears perked up as I looked up at him with bright red eyes. He took off his hat, setting it onto the nonexistent floor next to him, and laying down. I cautiously gauged him up and down, but eventually also laid down next to him.
“My service in the Equestrian Military was some of the best years of my life.” He explained. “It was like I was made for it. Which, in some ways, I was.” He rotated on his belly, showing me his flank. My eyes went wide at the mark. It was a medal of honor, golden with a red pin on the top. “I would wake up everyday, and march for those bastards. I was good at it, too. So good, that I became a general.” He tapped his hat laying next to him. I furrowed my brows, looking down at his badges on his chest.
“The-” I squinted my eyes. “The Grote… The… The Grate? The Grate Cyclist…”
“The Great Griffon War.” He corrected, rubbing his golden patch.
“Sorry… I’m kinda dyslexic…” I rubbed my hoof against my wrist.”
“No worries, kid.” He waved. “Anyways- My service was the best years of my life.” His eyes seemed to darken, looking down at the ground. “Until that damned war broke out.” He let out a huge sigh. “Some dumb pony decided to assassinate a Griffon King. Hooves were pointed from both sides, until one day, they just decided to go to war. I wasn’t making beds anymore, I was leading an entire platoon. I was waking up in the mud, dodging bullets, and trying not to eat a grenade.”
“How’d you die?” I asked. The moment the question left my mouth, I covered it in shame. What a question to ask! Apparently, though, it didn’t really seem to phase Ferdinand.
“It was about three years into the war. We were stuck in a trench for a good week at that point. I went to bed, and- well, the trench was overrun while I was out.” He sighed. “I didn’t die in glory. I didn’t die protecting Princess Celestia. I died in my sleep from a bullet to the head.” He reached up, tapping his temple. I sucked in air from my teeth, cringing.
“...was that where you were shot?” I asked.
“Indeed.” He turned his head to the left, and I could’ve sworn I felt the breath leave from my lungs. I somehow didn’t notice it earlier, but on his temple was a white blob of fur, about the size of a bit. He turned his head to the other side, and I felt my jaw open. On the other side of his head was an even larger mark, this time less even in circumference and more… well, messy. Like an exit wound.
“That’s… cool!” I said. I could still feel the tears burning in my eyes, but made a point to wipe away anything remaining. I don’t cry a lot, but when I do, it’s usually in small numbers. Which was strange, as this was probably the one thing I should be crying about. “But… I have a question, mister Hoof.”
“Just Ferdinand is fine. No mister.” He crossed his hooves. “What’s the question, filly?”
“What was that story about?”
…
“What?” He asked in confusion.
“I mean… I just lost my life.” I explained, spreading my hooves wide. “And… well, was that meant to put my death into perspective, or something? Like- I still died. You died eight hundred years ago, and I died like, two minutes ago.” I sniffled. “That’s a pretty big time difference.”
“I dunno!” He exclaimed, also spreading his hooves wide. “I just thought- you know, you were going through some stuff, and I went through some stuff!”
“Yeah, but like- I just died. Was your idea to say my death was less important, or something?”
“No!” He waved his hooves quickly. “No! I just- never mind, okay? I was just trying to be supportive!”
We both fell into silence for a moment. I’m not sure why I said what I did. Maybe I was angry that I died. Maybe not. I didn’t feel angry. But your own emotions can be pretty misleading, especially if your only source is yourself.
“...do I have a white spot?” I tentatively asked. The stallion, still laying on the floor, rolled his eyes with a gentle and understanding smile, even after all of that bickering.
“They’re called Deathmarks.” He explained. “You have one, too.”
“Do I?” I asked. Excitement fluttered in my chest as I rapidly looked around my body, not finding anything different. “Where is it?”
“On your head.” He said. Just like the clipboard, a handheld mirror popped into existence, being also held by nothing. It levitated over, and I pinched the silver handle between both of my hooves, looking at myself.
I turned left and right, letting my mane flow. On the back half of my skull, which was kind of hard to see because of my position with the mirror, there was a huge thin and white spider-web like mark. It looked like it was just part of my fur, and I could even move it with my mane.
“Cool!” I said, feeling a little better about my current predicament. “Is that how I died?” The mirror fizzled out of existence, like it was never even there in the first place.
“If I had to hazard a guess, I would say you shattered your skull.” He said, looking at my head. “Pretty nasty. The worst I’ve seen was a mare, a year or two after I died. Poor Pegasus didn’t see the grenade roll under her. She had a pink coat, but showed up here completely white.
“Ow…” I shivered, imagining how much it would hurt to be blown up.
“Meh. She didn’t feel a thing. It was, quite literally, blink, and she was here. I was the same way. I fell asleep, and woke up here. We both didn’t see it coming, so we really didn’t have the room for feeling pain. I still know the mare, too. Her name’s Gladys. We’re- kind of dating?” He shrugged. “We’ve been kind of dating for the past seven hundred years, though, so..?”
“I didn’t feel my death, either.” I said. “I just… bled out, I think.”
“That’s good!” He smiled. “Alotta ponies don’t like dying.” He shook his head. “Never mind that. We should probably get going. We have to get you booked for the after life.” He stood up, sliding his general’s hat back onto his head.
“The afterlife? This isn’t it?”
“No. This is Limbo.” He gestured vaguely. “This is kind of just volunteer work, guiding newly dead to Paradise. You’ll love it there. Ponies don’t really age. Don’t get younger, never need to eat, sleep, get fat… you can still do all of those things, of course. Change your body. It doesn’t happen naturally.”
“Huh.” I said, feeling weirdly okay with what was happening. Maybe after crying, I felt a little more at zen. But a thought still did bug me, however… “What’s gonna happen to my friends?” I asked. He puffed out his cheeks, turning around and beginning to walk. I took it as a sign to walk with him.
“Probably freak out a bit?” He guessed. “Get somepony to verify you’re actually dead. Then- well, bury you, I’d think.”
“I dunno…” I sighed. “I feel a little bad leaving them like that, though. I mean- there was a lot of blood.”
“You’ll see them again.” He said with a fond smile. “Unless they’re an Alicorn, they also have an expiration date. I got to see my parents again. Super happy when they saw me. I wish I was there to guide them to Paradise. They had to put up with Hollow. Prick kept cracking jokes about being dead.”
“Am I gonna see my aunts again?” I suddenly shouted, looking up and bouncing a little bit with excitement.
“Course, kid!” He laughed. “I’m sure they’ll be super happy to see you!”
“Aw, yeah!” I laughed, feeling joyful.
“And even two others I’m sure would be happy to see you.” He added mysteriously. I didn’t really know what that meant, but I kept on bouncing.
Eventually, we came to a wall. An actual wall, though I wasn’t sure how I knew it was a wall. All I knew was that when I walked through it, I saw a few ponies I thought I would never see again.
I saw my aunts. And I saw two other ponies who happened to share a few mane and coat colors with me.
There were many, many words to describe what had just happened.
It was shocking. Terrible. A tragedy. Scarring.
But none of them, even the vulgar ones involving swears, could quite capture the fear and shock that went through the two fillies as they leaned over the edge of the cliff, staring down at the cave below.
They stared idly for a few moments, looking down at the body splayed across the stone cold floor a few stories below them. Scootaloo was curled into a ball, a pool of liquid rapidly spilling out of the back of her head. They were meant to be getting their Cutiemarks in cave exploration. Instead, a particularly worn rope had snapped in half, leaving the corpse of Scootaloo down below. Apple Bloom was the first to talk.
“Scootaloo!” She shouted with pain. Sweetie Belle suddenly snapped out of her trance, taking a few hurried and quick steps away from the cliff. She tripped over a roof, falling to her flank as she put a hoof over her mouth in shock, and maybe even an attempt to hide the tears suddenly developing. “Oh mah Celestia! Holy- Sweetie, we have’ta go- ah-” Apple Bloom stuttered, feeling her stomach clench uncomfortably. “Ah’m gonna be sick!” She shouted, suddenly turning away from the cliff and galloping towards a nearby bush.
Sweetie Belle just stayed silent, her eyes focused on the edge of the cliff. She could vaguely hear and see Apple Bloom’s body contorting as the smell of bile filled the air around the small clearing in the forest. The smell made her own stomach clench, but for some reason, she couldn’t quite bring herself to move or even talk. It was like she was frozen, tears slipping out of her eyes and down her cheeks.
Apple Bloom spit into the bush, trying her hardest to clean her mouth. She turned back around, staring back down the cliff. Still, at the bottom, was the corpse. It now had the addition of blood gurgling out of it’s mouth, Scootaloo’s orange fur slowly becoming stained with red.
“Oh mah- No- Oh mah fucking- oh-” Apple Bloom clenched again, forcing her eyes away and trotting back once more. They weren’t even that far into the forest, the houses of Ponyville being quite clear from the sparce treeline.
Her lips turned into a frown, tears threatening to slip out. She squeezed her eyes shut, forcing her hooves to her eyelids.
“W-We have’ta get help!” She said through the tears. “M-Maybe- there ain’t no way s-she-” Apple Bloom swallowed her spit harshly, still tasting the vomit that threatened her throat. “A-Ah gotta find a P-Pegasus. L-Like Rainbow- or-” She finally opened her now red and puffy eyes, standing up. “S-Stay here with Scootaloo, Sweetie.” She commanded. Sweetie Belle was still sitting down, hoof still over her mouth in perpetual shock. “Ah’ll be back!”
She began sprinting away. The wind began flicking her eyes, making them burn from the preexisting tears.
She didn’t want to think about it. She didn’t want to think about Scootaloo.
But she just lost a best friend.
