The Joke No One Got

by Zarmflamekin

Rating: everyone
Tags: Discord, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2776

It's April Fools Day, and Twilight Sparkle can't put her hoof on the joke.

It's April Fools Day and Twilight Sparkle is weary of the days pranks. Yet, throughout the day, she can't shake that there's a joke she's just not getting.

Featured: 4/2/2023

Published 2023-04-01 21:20:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-04-01 21:20:00 UTC

It's a Little Off Kilter

As Twilight awoke one morning in Ponyville, she stretched with a contented yawn before she remembered which day it was.

April first. April Fools Day.

And while antics had been curbed over the years, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash were still notorious pranksters, with today being just one big reason to take a hoof off the breaks. So while pranks may not derail her work or research, there were probably going to be more inconveniences today than usual.

The first inconvenience of course being a mundane one as she bumped a shoulder into her bedpost. Twilight hissed a little at the pain, but it definitely helped her wake up a bit as she made her way about her daily routine. In no time she was downstairs and finding a well made breakfast by her best drake, though today being what it was, there was no way to know if Spike had done anything to the food.

Though if he did, Twilight mentally shrugged, it would be for a bite at worst.

“Morning Spike.” Twilight greeted as she stepped into the kitchen.

“Morning Twi.” Spike replied as he looked over his shoulder. “Blueberry waffles and orange juice this morning.”

“Thanks.” Twilight smiled as she took a seat, though something seemed a bit off as she sat. Shifting a it seemed to fix it however and she spread maple syrup generously across the waffles. Cutting a piece and taking a bite Twilight found the taste to be a bit off as well.

“Spiiiike.” Twilight rolled her eyes as she tilted her head at the snickering drake.

“April Fools Twilight. Don’t worry, it’s just chocolate chip.” Spike stood aside to show the half empty bag of chocolate bits. “I figured this would be about the only time I could get you.”

“And thank you for making it a delicious one.” Twilight smiled lovingly as she made her way through breakfast. After a time where the pair had made their way through a hearty breakfast, Twilight went to address the days work.

“So the last few chairs for the main study hall should be done, so I’ll be off to collect those in a little bit, then today was the day Fluttershy and I arranged to go bird spotting in Whitetail Woods. Is there anything else I could do while picking up the chairs before meeting Fluttershy?”

“I think Pinkie was doing some sort of backward surprise cupcakes today, though what that’s supposed to mean I have no clue, but it sounds interesting. Maybe grab one for me on the way back?” Spike asked as he washed the dishes. He was on librarian duty today to return books and help those who came looking for answers.

Since he’s going to be so diligent, I suppose. Twilight contemplated. “Do you really want to try one, or should I try one first to see if you would like it? I guarantee that I’ll get something for you to snack on while I’m out.”

“I want one, it would be a shame to not be a part of Pinkie’s antics while I’m cooped up here today.”

“Okaaay.” Twilight drew out her response to make sure Spike was sure. Pinkie was a good baker, but experiments could lead to disappointment. Maybe she’d stop by Rarity to see if she had any gem shavings she’d be willing to part with for Spike. “I’ll be off then. And be sure to make sure nopony is doing anything to the books for pranks. No dusting of sneezing powder or goo or-“

“Yeah Twilight I get it, keep the place spotless, like normal. No need to worry! I’ve got this.” Spike said with a proud pounding of his chest. Twilight could only smile as she nuzzled the drake’s head before making her way into town. Grabbing her saddle bags and a heft of bits, she opened the castle door to a beautiful morning.

Walking from the castle to town, Twilight was sure to keep a vigil for any wayward confetti or cream from overly enthusiastic ponies as she decided to make her way over to Rarity first as that would be the quickest stop to make. Unfortunately Twilight’s vigil didn’t quite work, for while she wasn’t blasted with any confetti when Bon Bon opened up her mailbox, she was close enough for the pop to startle her an d cause her to stumble into a cart track worn into the street.

“Ooh, are you okay Twilight?” Derpy stopped above and asked as she saw the trip.

“Ah, I’m fine Derpy.” Twilight replied as she looked up an reassured the mailmare. “Just a little stumble, nothing much.”

“Oh, okay.” Derpy nodded as she made her way to her next delivery.

As Twilight shook her hoof, she frowned. She was more than sure she hadn’t been that close to the tracks, but maybe the confetti pop had been louder than she expected. Looking back at the thoroughly unimpressed Bon Bon, that may in fact be the case.

Thankfully that was the only fluke among her walk to Carousel Boutique, and while the place seemed quiet enough, when Twilight walked in, she found a profoundly frustrated seamstress at a work desk, concentrating furiously on the dress she was stitching. Though what was confounding to Twilight was the unused sewing machine beside her. After a second of thought, Twilight began to feel for her friend.

“Hi Rarity.” Twilight said in an apologetic tone.

“Hm? Oh! Twilight! Hello!” Rarity looked up from her work with a look of relief.

“Did somepony do something to your sewing machine?”

“You can tell?” Rarity sighed in exasperation as she looked at the condemned thing.

“Well, I don’t see you doing this by hoof with so much material.” Twilight gestured to the abundance of material. “What happened?”

“I don’t know.” Rarity seethed. “But whoever tinkered with it offset its alignment and I can’t get it to stitch straight for three seconds before it goes off line.”

“Oh.” Twilight frowned as she looked at the machine. In her time she had dealt with quite a few machines, and while nothing looked wrong to her at a glance, if Rarity said it wasn’t working right, she was going to take the master’s word for it. “Well, I hope whoever did that will come forward sometime today and fix it.”

“Me too darling. Now, what brings you my way, hm?” Rarity set down her tools and turned to the purple mare. “And please don’t ask for any alterations right now.”

“No, no.” Twilight chuckled. “Spike asked me to grab him one of Pinkie’s backwards surprise cupcakes she’s making today, but because he doesn’t quite know what it is, I wanted to surprise him with something I know he would like in case the cupcake is no good. So I was wondering if you had any gem chips he could snack on.”

“Mmm, yes, I believe I still have some laying around from Sapphire Shore’s last order. Sapphires, of course, if that’s fine.” Rarity said as she rummaged through some drawers before finding a tied off bag and floated it over to Twilight.

“I’m sure it will be if I say it’s from you.” Twilight smirked.

“Darling, don’t tease the poor dear.” Rarity waved her hoof as she looked aside with a smile of her own.

“Uh huh, would it be teasing if I say you said ‘hi’?”

“No, I don’t suppose it would be.” Rarity sighed. “Was that all?”

“I mean, mostly. I’m going birdwatching with Fluttershy later, so if the cupcakes turn out okay, would you like me to grab you one?”

“Only if Spike gives his approval of it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t say no to some lemon bars.”

“I’ll see what I can do. Thanks Rarity!”

“Be safe Dear!” Rarity waved her friend off as she turned back to her work.

Next stop on Twilight’s list was Sugar Cube Corner, where she found a bit of a crowd in the shop. Glancing about she could see quite a bit of ponies looking quizzically at cupcakes with bits taken out of them, so she assumed that the backward surprise cupcakes were selling pretty well. After a few minutes wait, she made her way to the front counter where Mrs. Cake was tending the register.

“Good morning Twilight, what can I do for you today?” Mrs. Cake asked.

“Well, Spike asked for a backwards surprise cupcake, can you tell me anything about them?”

“Oh, they’re just some normal cupcakes, but all of their colors have been mixed around.”

“Mrs. Caaaake!” Pinkie Pie whined as she lay across the display counter. “They’re supposed to figure that out themselves!”

“Pinkie, off the counter please.” Mrs. Cake replied completely unfazed by the pink mare’s sudden appearance. “And Twilight said it was for Spike, and he’s not here. I don’t think it would be a good idea to send her off with something somepony else wouldn’t like.”

“Oh! Okie Dokie! Ooo, and the oven seems to be a bit finicky today, so I’ll take charge of all the baking today until it gets better!” Pinkie sprung up and bounced her way back into the kitchen. “Oh! Hi Twilight!” Pinkie seemed to remember as she poked her head back out and waved.

Twilight could only wave back half heartedly as she looked back to the cashier. “So do you know what flavor is what, or can only Pinkie keep that straight?”

“Well, she didn’t tell me exactly what was what, but I can make some guesses based on ponies reactions.” Mrs. Cake said as she began to point out the cupcakes. A while later Twilight was walking out with a yellow cherry, green lemon, black strawberry cupcake, as well as some lemon bars if things didn’t exactly pan out as she planned. She was going to wait and taste test the confections with Spike later, so now she was on her way to pick up the last of her new chairs.

As she made her way to her last destination for now, Twilight could hear laughs and groans as prank after prank was discovered through the morning. She hoped that all of it would be out of ponies system soon, especially as she entered Quills and Sofas just in time to hear what she hoped was a Whoopie Cushion going off.

“Dang it Quick Fix!” A stallion shouted over another’s laughter.

“Just the one! I had to do just the one! You’re to predicable Fine Point!” The second stallion got out.

“Ugh, if only the one! I wasn’t planning anything, but now I have to get you for that!” Fine Point threatened. As Twilight made her way through the store she found the two Earth Ponies standing beside one of her chairs, and sure enough, a deflated whoopie cushion was there.

“Please, as if you could get- oh! Miss Sparkle, morning!” The green stallion, Quick Fix, noticed her first and dipped his head in greeting, causing the fuming white stallion, Fine Point, to change his attention and demeanor fast.

“Well, nice to see everything is going fine here. So I take it my chairs are ready then?”

“Um… yes… mostly.” Fine Point answered, making both stallions shuffle their hooves in embarrassment.

“It’s April Fools Day, I get it, no need to be embarrassed.” Twilight tried to deflect.

“No, it’s not that.” Fine Point sighed. “See for yourself.” He motioned Twilight to come closer. Of the four chairs she needed, two seemed in pristine condition, one had a woopie cushion on it, and the last was laying on its side. Twilight could immediately see the problem. As the last chair’s feet seemed unfinished, and chunks of wood were laying around it.

“We don’t know what happened, but this morning, all of our tools are off. If you can see, none of these test blocks have a clean cut, so we can’t finish modeling the last one’s feet. And as we were doing the final stability tests, well…” Fine Point directed a look at Quick Fix.

“Hey, the woopie cushion was my only prank. I wouldn’t tamper with all of our tools.” Quick Fix defended himself.

“Hmm, that’s odd.” Twilight muttered. “One of my friends has the alignment of her sewing machine off as well. Well,” Twilight sighed. “I hope whoever did this comes forward by the end of the day and fixes it. I can see you’re almost done, so I can just come back tomorrow for the last one if I can take the other three.”

“Not a problem at all Miss Sparkle. I suppose you won’t need any help getting these back to the castle?” Fine Point breathed in relief.

“No, I won’t. Thank you for your work you two, I’m sorry this had to happen at the last minute.”

“It’s not your fault Miss Sparkle. Thanks for understanding our predicament.” Quick Fix nodded as he took his woopie cushion back. Twilight smiled politely as she took the three completed chairs in her telekinetic grip and cautiously moved them through the store and out the front.

As she made her way back to the castle, Twilight pondered. Something seemed weird today, but she couldn’t quite place it. Well, odd things happening today was to be expected, but something nagged at her.

But as she saw a disappointed looking Discord sitting on her front steps, she began to worry. This kind of day seemed like it would be right up his alley, but if he wasn’t happy on a day of chaos, that was worrying.

“Discord? What are you doing here?” Twilight asked as she stopped at her front steps.

“Oh, just lamenting everypony’s sense of humor.” Discord sighed, chin in hands.

“What do you mean by that?” Twilight tilted her head. She felt she was right on the money that today was making him sad, but was he really looking down on ponies antics today?

“I made the perfect prank yesterday and nobody seems to be appreciating it!” Discord gestured with both of his arms out to the town in exasperation. “All these confetti poppers and woopie cushions, but the biggest prank of all is right there and nobody gets it!” Discord humphed as he rest his chin back in his lion paw.

“Well, normally when you pull a prank, you tell ponies who fell for it with a declaration of ‘April Fools!’, you know?” Twilight tried to cheer up the spirit.

“Oh.” Discord blinked, as if this part of the day hadn’t occurred to him. “April Fools then Twilight Sparkle!”

“Ah, okay…” Twilight looked around for the prank. “Uh, so what was the prank?”

“You’ve been falling for it all day!” Discord proclaimed proudly.

“I have?”

“Ever since you woke up, I expect.” Discord smiled.

Twilight thought back to waking up and tried to think about what she could have possible been falling for all day. Since this morning hadn’t been so nice when she-

"No. No way. No possible way." Twilight muttered.

"It looks like you're almost there." Discord smiled with gleaming eyes.

“You… you moved… everything.” Twilight realized. Everything was off kilter. Her bedpost, the chairs, the road, the tools, everything was just slightly out of place. In relative space.

“Finally someone gets it!” Discord clapped. “Fluttershy pulled this on me yesterday for our weekly tea and I found it absolutely brilliant! It even took me a while to realize what she did with her living room, just goes to show how far ahead of everyone else she is.”

“Discord, who would possibly notice you shifted reality? Noticing a living room out of line is a lot easier than noticing-“

Just then a bright flash of teleportation blinded Twilight, but soon enough she could see Princess Celestia standing beside her, legs spread and braced for hostility.

“YOU!” Celestia declared. “Put it back!”

“Princess?” Twilight asked, causing the fuming princess to break concentration to look down to her purple protégé. “What did Discord take?”

“He-!” Celestia caught herself a tried to recompose her image. “He didn’t take anything. He… moved… well, everything.”

“Ooo! Someone did get it without me telling them anything!” Discord smiled even wider and clapped. “How is it? Off-putting, isn’t it? Tell me, how long did it take you to notice?”

“Discord, please, put everything back before Luna realizes what you did.” Celestia asked, pleaded almost.

“Luna?” Twilight and Discord looked confused.

“We’ve had a ceasefire after she came back, but if she notices this, she’ll think I’m the only one who could do it and-“

“THE PRANK WARS CONTINUE!” The Royal Canterlot Voice could be heard from Ponyville.

“Oh me.” Celestia whispered.