Since Luna retired, bureaucracy filled Twilight’s dreams, just as it did her waking life. However, tonight was different. A dream of sunshine and rainbows delighted the Princess of Friendship. After a long while, she would finally be able to recharge her mental capacity. Or so she thought.
“Twilight Sparkle!” A claw and a paw grabbed her from that very dream and dragged her to the cruel reality. “This is no time to be lazy.”
Twilight wiped the rheum off her eyes with a hoof. “What’s going on here?”
“Help her!” Discord shoved Fluttershy’s face against Twilight’s. “She’s dying!”
Fluttershy whispered in her ear, “I couldn’t stop him…”
“Wait, you’re dying?” Twilight stood up on her bed to examine her friend stuck in the draconequus’s tight grip.
Fluttershy sighed. “I’m not actually dying…”
“Yes you are!” Discord objected. “Every passing moment, you’re closer to death. We’ve just been to the doctor and she confirmed that you have less than a hundred years left to live.”
Fluttershy rolled her eyes. “He woke up Nurse Redheart as well…”
Twilight looked her friend over just in case. “So, there’s basically nothing wrong with you?”
“That’s the gist of it, but you know how Discord gets sometimes.” She looked up at him. “I love you with all my heart, but you really peeve me sometimes.” She quickly covered her dirty snout with a hoof.
Discord turned Fluttershy on her back and presented her to Twilight Sparkle. “Make her immortal.”
“Hmm…” Twilight put a hoof under her muzzle.
“Wait!” Fluttershy tried to wiggle out of his hands. “You’re not actually taking him seriously, are you?”
“Well, the prospect of immortality is a fascinating one, and I have actually studied it to great length.”
“So, you can do it then?” Discord grinned.
“No.”
“Well, some Princess you are…”
Fluttershy finally wiggled out of his grip and put a hoof on her friend’s shoulder. “He doesn’t mean that, Twilight.”
“Well, there is one way…”
“No, Twilight! Don’t give him any ideas!”
Discord shoved Fluttershy to the side. “I’m listening.”
“Okay, here’s the thing.” Twilight sat down and waved her forehooves enthusiastically. “Immortality can only be achieved with high-level permanent magic. Alicorn or chaos magic, to be exact. Short of killing an Alicorn, one cannot obtain it.”
Discord started sharpening his claws on a nearby wall.
“Don’t give him ideas!” Fluttershy loudly whispered.
“However, in my research, I found a loophole.”
“Do tell…” Discord slid around Twilight, not taking his eyes off her.
“Permanent magic works because it doesn’t run out. But there’s another thing that doesn’t run out, and that’s mana siphon.”
“Well, I don’t want to be a mana siphon, so I guess we’ll be heading home now.” Fluttershy bit at Discord’s tail and pulled with all her weight.
“Like the Tree of Harmony, for instance.” Twilight continued.
Fluttershy’s mouth opened, flinging the resisting Discord over the bed. Her ears perked as she yelped enthusiastically, “I’d like to be a tree!” A squee followed right after.
“There’s no undoing it, though. If you become a tree, you’ll be like that for eternity.”
“Tree?” Discord leaned on the bed.
Fluttershy nodded. “Yes to the tree.”
“I’ve been daydreaming of performing this spell every day during my paperwork sessions, but I never thought I’d actually get the chance to cast it. This is so exciting!” Twilight charged her horn, wrapped Fluttershy in a magical aura, and threw her out the window.
Discord opened her mouth in shock, but no words came out.
“Twilight!” The winged friend fluttered back to the window. “Did you just throw me off the second floor‽”
“You’re a pegasus, get over it. Now go pick a free spot for yourself. I don’t want a tree in my castle.”
Fluttershy landed in the clearing between the buildings, Twilight and Discord following suit. “I often come here at night when nopony is looking, and I pretend to be a tree.” She stood up on her hind legs and emulated a motionless tree.
“It’s settled then.” Twilight’s horn shone ever brighter.
“This is all moving much too fast,” Discord said. “I didn’t actually think it was possible, I just wanted to wake up a princess.”
“Don’t you dare take this away from me!” Fluttershy yelled, then went back to pretending to be a tree.
Twilight’s eyes glowed white. “For your own safety, stay clear of her, Discord.”
“I don’t like where this is going,” he protested, but obeyed, gaining some distance.
“Virtual siphon structure composed. Rooting it down!” She touched the ground with her horn.
Magic circles extended around Fluttershy. They spun around, ancient runes dancing in the opposite direction.
“Siphon network established. Binding to endpoint. Metamorphing to static holder. Conjoining magic energies to matter. Absorption overlay dispensing.”
Fluttershy’s form started to change. Her legs sank into the ground, yet she seemed to grow taller. She remained static, except for her smile which grew ever bigger until it morphed into bark.
Sparks flew from Twilight’s horn. Smoke rose up.
“Fluttershy?” Discord asked.
“Immortality gifted.” Twilight shut down her horn and blew to cool it down. “I’m so awesome!”
Discord levitated closer to the yellow tree.
“I’d stay clear if I were you,” Twilight warned. “She’s a siphon now.”
“She’s a tree…” Discord floated closer and touched one of the branches.
A burst of energy rushed from his whole body.
Discord fell to the ground and crawled away. “Okay, enough playing around, Fluttershy. I’m changing you back.” He snapped his fingers, but nothing happened.
“I told you it’s dangerous for you to get close to it.” Twilight pulled a notepad from somewhere and started writing.
“Why are you so calm? I just lost my magic.”
“Your magic is part of Equestria now. I suspect we’re in for a bountiful season this year. I’ll have to measure the change in fertility to confirm the scale of it, but I can already say that your sacrifice will not be in vain. Equestria is in your debt.”
“I want the debt repaid right this instant! I want my magic back!”
“I don’t think you’ll ever get your magic back, but you shouldn’t stress about it, anyway.” She kept looking at her notes.
“I’m supposed to be the Spirit of Chaos. Of course I’ll stress about it. My magic is what I am.”
“Still, there’s no use worrying about something you can’t affect.”
“No use worrying‽ What am I supposed to do without my magic? I can’t even get home to my realm.”
Twilight shrugged her shoulders. “You could try getting a job, I guess.”
“A job?”
“You don’t have to worry about normality causing chaotic fadeout anymore. You no longer have to sustain chaos magic with your actions since you don’t have any. So consider it a boon instead of a curse. Getting a job might have killed you before, but that excuse no longer applies.”
“You want me to get a job?”
She glanced at him and snickered. “I’ll give you one bit if you bring me a glass of water. I feel kind of parched.”
“Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t.” He snapped his fingers repeatedly. “See? No glass of water is appearing.”
“You could just go to the castle’s kitchen, pick up a glass, and pour water in it. That’s how most civilized citizens do it.”
“That would feel like work...”
“That’s kind of what having a job is about.”
“Ugh!” He clenched his claw and paw then walked back toward the yellow tree.
“I wouldn’t touch it any further if I were you.”
He wrestled with a branch. “Give it back, tree!”
Instead of giving back, the tree took more.
“Interacting further with a siphon could sap the remainder of your energies and take away even the life-time you still have left.“
Discord collapsed on the ground and crawled away again. “What do you mean ‘have left’? I’m immortal!”
“Correction: you were immortal. Now your existence is bound to this century alone. There is some good news for you, though.”
“No longer immortal...” He crumbled down and looked up at her. “What’s the good news?”
“The good news is, I’m still immortal. My magic supplies the lifeforce, just like yours used to keep you running.”
“How’s that good news?”
“I’ll probably remember you well into the next century. Your existence so far was kind of impactful.”
“Again, how’s that good news?”
“Well, what do you expect me to say?” She put down the notebook. “You’ll die. Is that better? And if a mere carriage hits you when you’re not watching, you may die even sooner. Is that what you want to hear? It is the truth, you know.”
Discord sighed. “Twilight, can you make me immortal again?”
“Funny story, I’ve just perfected a spell for immortality. Discord, how would you like to be an eternal siphon instead of the persistent menace?”
“Let’s drop the act, Twilight. I’m not stupid, you know? You think that now that you’re a Princess, you’re responsible for Equestria.”
“Every day, I was risking Equestria’s safety by ignoring the potential danger you presented.”
“I know. My power was too much of a variable in your eyes. You feared what you could not control, so you were even willing to sacrifice your friend to take me down a notch.”
A single tear drifted down Twilight’s face. “Fluttershy kept you in check, but that wouldn’t last forever. You’d probably snap once you lost her, and Equestria would pay the price. I had no contingency plan for that inevitability. Despite all that, I couldn’t bring myself to do what was necessary. But when even Fluttershy was on board with it, I made the best of the opportunity.”
“I don’t blame you, Twilight. I’ve done much worse things in my long life, and with bad intentions on top. My only regret is underestimating you today. You beat me at my own game.”
“I know I’ve wronged you, Discord. But now that you’re no longer a threat, I’m willing to make amends. Whatever you need to establish a new life for yourself, I’ll provide it for you.”
“Just finish it, Twilight.” Discord walked to the yellow tree and hugged it. “Make me a tree as well.”
Author's Note
Gdoc
