'I warily blinked my eyes in rapid succession upon FINALLY seeing the sun in full view as I pushed my way through the last of the bushes that were within my path. I could already see the buildings ahead with their modern looks, the thatch roofs, the abundance of pink coloring on the doors and window frames, fucking so many flowers as well! I mean I know ponies liked to eat and smell flowers, but I swear they had an addiction to flowers!'

'I continued forward as I got closer and closer to the town that was considered VERY friendly (to ponies) and also VERY..."unusual". I was...aware of the things that happened within this town, usually it was strange or abnormal events leading to incursions of idiocy such as stampedes, raining frogs, tidal waves of waver sweeping through the streets as a certain (pink menace) would ride them upon a mailbox laughing loudly! I swear this might be the stupidest decision to choose such a town when I had so many other options!

'I continued trotting at a brisk pace I started to hear a...whistle...it was a LOUD whistle but not like a train whistle but more like a...bullet whistle but one that was more profound? It sounded like it was getting closer...and closer...and CLO-'

"HOLY FUCK!" 'I shout in surprise as I duck for cover as a LITERAL firework sails over my head and explodes behind me!'

Kickstart My Heart (2021- Remaster) - YouTube

'I warily get up as I look around in a daze as I look back towards the town with a dumbstruck expression as I keep my eyes fixed on the town...then all hell lets loose! It was like the damned apocalypse, but the zombies were fireworks! Fireworks were going off left and right, down the middle and over the bend! I shouted all sorts of slurs and obscenities as I ducked for cover a second time as fireworks exploded EVERYWHERE!'

'Fireworks were going off in the sky, within the streets, landing in the nearby rush of water that came directly from the Everfree! They were even going inside the poor ponies houses! OH GOD NOT THE ORPHANAGE! It was pure mayhem and CHAOS! It was like a true warzone as ponies flipped all sorts of carts and tables just to avoid getting gut checked by a firework!'

'Thats when something else even more terrible began to occur...a deep rumbling...oh to this day I could remember the quaking of the ground as the blood curdling screams resonated throughout the air! It was a stampede of damned cows! A firework must have gone off somewhere within where they were grazing which MUST have startled them to begin with! They began to charge down the streets as they crashed through all sorts of things such as the market district of the town as they flipped and crushed all sorts of trade stands and market stands in an attempt to get away from the fireworks that were STILL going off!?!'

'Did these ponies seriously consider this normal or was that just something they told themselves just to mainly not lose their sanity from the horrors of weirdness within their everyday lives? Honestly, I felt pretty bad for these ponies if they've been dealing with these types of events for years!'

'I slowly crawled across the ground towards the town as to avoid all the mayhem that was going on, but alas it was still getting worse and worse by the damned minute! Thats when the next "quake" began. It was slow at first but ever so quickly increasing and oh how it came! It was a blasted swarm of chickens! But your probably thinking "they came because of the fireworks, right?" WRONG! They were chasing a little orange filly! They looked so driven to chase her! They didn't seem angry but more like they wished to worship her? It was kinda hard to tell with their beady little eyes and small features.

'At this point I was just hunkering down within a bush as I peaked my head out just to view what was going on. The chicken and cows were REALLY going at it. Some of the chickens must have gotten into something because they were zipping around everywhere! They were pecking at ponies hooves, eating all sorts of foods such as...oh GOD! THEY GOT INTO THE PROTEIN SHAKES! Those are gonna be some pretty beefy chickens after all of this!'

'Now, you would think these three events were the end of this madness, right? WELL YOUR WRONG! It became even worse...much worse...oh it was HORRIBLE! Thats when the ground began to shake for one final time. Oh how the worlds populace trembled at the sight of what came next! It was a stampede of BUNNIES! But alas it was no normal stampede! It was being led by a certain (white little menace that has a name beginning with "A")! He rode atop his majestic stead, the farm dog that resided within sweat apple acres (Wyona). He was currently wielding a ladle as well as wearing a bucket upon his head as if he were some sort of calvary unit with a frontal charge!'

'The bunny seemed to be squeaking orders as he pointed to certain bunnies then pointed in certain directions as the bunnies he pointed to saluted and hopped off. Apparently these bunnies were here to help and I found it, to this day...weird. Minutes passed as things began to come to a standstill as things became calmer and calmer until the surrounding area was more "serene" in a sense.'

'I slowly pushed my way out of the branches of the bush I was in as I peaked my head out to view the surrounding area and oh boy was it a MESS! There was fires everywhere, cows eating all sorts of stuff, chickens clucking and gently pecking things, ponies cleaning up all sorts of puddles and wrecks and all sorts of things that probably cost a lot to maintain and repair. In all seriousness, I had only a few words to say about all this.'

"What in the fuck am I getting myself into!" 'I say with a surprised tone and look as I stare at the messes of all messes (but oh it was gonna get worse in the future...I can assure you on that...)'

Author's Note

NEW CHAPTER! ENJOY THE MAYHEM! YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!