North Star sat at the Canterlot train station, his eyes on the clock. The train was due to arrive soon, and he hoped she would be here soon. The thought of returning back after being gone for years, he was coming back home. As he leaned back into the seat, his mind wandered. His family, the gang, what were they all going to think of him? He feared a reaction the same as before, if not worse. And yet, that wasn’t the worst part. A small part of his mind kept thinking about his ex, and the worries of seeing her again…

“Sir!”

North jolted back, hitting his head against the wooden station walls, and turned to face the sound. It was Lily, Iron, and a few other members of the Night Guard cadets. Each one was in uniform, saluting their fellow soldier.

“Guys, you don’t have to salute me when I’m off-duty…” He chuckled and slowly rose to his hooves with a salute of his own. “But, I appreciate you coming. That being said, does Lieutenant Silk know you’re here?”

“We promised to clean the barracks for the week, sir!” Scarlet Spark shouted, saluting hard enough to almost knock his shaded goggles off.

“Heh, figures…” North shook his head with a slightly nostalgic smile.

“More importantly…” Lily slowly approached with a wide grin. “We wanted to see this marefriend of yours! Somepony told us that if we caught up, we’d be able to catch a glimpse!”

“For the record,” Iron spoke up while eyeing Lily. “Lily roped us all into this.”

“Uhuh…” The experienced Night Guard looked at the cadets with a slight smirk. “And did this somepony happen to wear a stetson?”

Iron looked towards the tracks to avert his eyes from North’s. “Perhaps…”

“Then kick him down the stairs for me. Another round of payback.”

As they all shared a laugh, the sounds of hoofsteps could be heard behind the troops. “Excuse me, is North Star among you?”

“Ah, yes. Pardon me, ma-”

Iron was caught off guard at the sight of the mare behind him, and as the others turned to look, they would very much be the same. Standing there was a Clydesdale mare, not as tall as Iron, but taller than North. Her dark crimson body was lithe and limber, and her mane was a deep indigo. Her cutie mark was a tilted over moonshine bottle that dripped out something resembling the moon. Around her neck was a necklace with an amulet carved of moonstone. She adjusted her rounded glasses that stayed in front of her amber eyes, carrying her bags with her magic past them and towards North.

As the two ponies shared a kiss, Lily would be the first to speak. “W-Wow! North, you’re really aiming high here, aren’t you? She’s beautiful!”

North blushed slightly and looked away as he and the mare broke their kiss. “W-Well, you know… It did just happen and…” He quickly cleared his throat. “Everypony, this is Moonshine Drop. She’s one of the Lunar Scholars who handle the sciences of the royal wines.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you all…” Moonshine bowed her head to them. “He tells me a lot of you all, of your potential. I truly feel safe knowing capable cadets like you guard this castle.”

Beaming with pride, Burning Iron bowed in turn as a means to show his ability to handle the delicate means of speaking with royal officials. “It is a pleasure, Ms. Drop. You are looking quite well today.”

The others followed Iron’s lead and bowed, and Drop slowly rose with a slight giggle. “Oh, you’re flattering me… Thank you very much for visiting us.”

As they exchanged very minor pleasantries, the train quickly pulled in and dumped out a number of ponies.

“All aboard, the 10:30 to Manehatten!”

“Well, that’s us,” North put his suitcase onto a nearby trolley. “You all better get back. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”

The small group looked to the soldier, a slight pain in their hearts for some reason as they saluted. “Sir! Have a safe trip!”

Giving one final salute, he slipped into the train car with Moonshine Drop before the doors closed and the train slowly chugged out of the station. Lily watched, her salute turning to a wave. Her face showed a smile disguising her slight melancholy. “Well… There goes my one chance at a real stallion…”

The others looked, shocked. She looked back and rolled her eyes. “What? A filly can dream, can’t she?” She sighed as she trotted back. “With a mare like that… I got no chance.”

Scarlet nodded and followed. “She is beautiful, kind, and she seems intelligent beyond our capabilities…” He ignored Lily’s death glares as he adjusted his goggles. “However, did anypony think she seemed… Off?”

They looked as the stallion walked and began to state his observations.

“Her movements, graceful if a bit awkward. She spoke almost motherly in a way, as if she was used to it. It almost seemed like… She knew who we were…”

“Scarlet, enough of your conspiracies,” Lightning spoke with a roll of her eyes. “Last time you told us that space mares abducted you after you drank too much cider and woke up in a crop field.”

“I did, I swear! They had glowing eyes!” While the group poked and laughed, Lily stopped and thought about it. Those things did seem familiar. Moreover, she felt like she’d seen them up close. Her eyes widened slightly as she looked back at the station.

“... No. It can’t be…” She laughed quietly to herself, hesitating for just a moment before returning with the others.

~

As the couple sat on the train, Moonshine smiled at North. “Well, what do you think? Was that convincing enough for them?”

“Mmmm, maybe…” North spoke as if lost in a dream, staring outside at the landscape that zipped past the window. “I’d still keep that little thing on. Those cadets are sharp.”

“I can tell. Truly cadets worthy of the tutelage of the great North Star!” She held a hoof up in a corny sense of grandeur, giggling right after the act. North smiled and rolled her eyes, gazing back at the window. Drop could see that something occupied his thoughts, and so leaned into him. “You seem troubled. Shall I lend you my ear?”

North shook his head, turning and kissing her cheek. “It’s nothing. I’m just… Nervous. I spent five years wandering, taking down any gang activity despite my family ties, and I haven’t touched Manehatten ground in… I don’t know, three or four years? Heck, I was a normal Pegasus when I left. What are they going to say now?”

The disguised princess looked up at the ceiling. She had considered his family’s reaction, especially with the gang. Considering his vague affiliation with them, she could understand what his vigilantism would lead to in Manehattan. Nevertheless, she had plans, and she took his hoof into her own. “Whatever they say, I will be there beside you. Do not fear, my starshine…”

He smiled slightly, leaning in and kissing her though this time on the lips. He felt at ease with her around, like he didn’t need to constantly fight the world. You’re panicking, North… He told his mind. Remember, focus on what’s ahead. That’s getting home. Then, his eyes widened slightly, and he repressed his panic further. Oh for Faust’s sake, I forgot about my apartment…

~~~

The train arrived at Maneway Station a good by mid-afternoon, Moonshine Drop energized after a good nap and North Star looking drained beyond all reason. He trundled along, shaking his head to get the cobwebs out. All he could think about was what would happen when Luna discovered his apartment. Still, he felt like things could be worse as he led the way while his marefriend played tourist and gawked at how amazing everything looked. Thankfully, all of the time spent not resting gave North enough time to plan.

“Alright, so if you want, I can call you a taxi somewhere for you to hang out while I take the luggage home,” North said reassuringly. “Then, I can rush back and meet you. It shouldn’t take me too long, either!”

Moonshine tilted her head. “Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you, dear?”

“Oh please,” North waved his hoof with a chuckle. “I’ve been around the block for ages. I know most of the places around. I want to give you a chance to do something fun while I take a moment to have our living space cleaned up.”

“Hmmm…” She looked up and tapped her chin. “Well, I suppose I could get us two tickets for a night show at Bridleway and then do a little sightseeing if you don’t mind taking some time apart.”

North nodded. “I think that’s a solid plan! Let me just go out and-”

“BIG BROOOOOOOOOOO!”

North flinched as a rush of pink and red flew right at him, knocking him over and leaving him prone. As he looked up, he saw a young pink mare with a red ponytail held by a ball cap. She smiled brightly as she cuddled close to him.

“Big bro! You’re back! When were you gonna tell me, dummy?~”

“Gck… L-Lotus, get off…!” He thrust his hips upward and tossed her off, getting up with a huff. “Geez, and what did I tell you, I’m not your brother!”

Lotus giggled and looked up at him. “Cousin, brother, what’s the difference~?”

“A lot, you weirdo!” North pinched his cousin’s cheek, earning some yelps and squeaks.

“H-Hey! Knock it off, you big meanie!”

After a moment of horseplay, the two separated, North in a slightly better mood. “Anyways, I wanted to introduce you to my marefriend. This is Moonshine Drop. Moonshine, this is my cousin Lotus Dance.”

Moonshine smiled and offered her hoof to the young mare. “A pleasure to meet you.”

Lotus looked at the mare, her smile dropping slightly. “Your… Marefriend?” She looked at the hoof and simply bowed her head. “It is an honor to meet you, miss.”

Caught slightly off guard, Moonshine bowed back in an attempt to show respect. Neither noticed the look of contempt his cousin showed for the briefest of moments as North grabbed the bags.

“Lotus, it’s actually a good chance I ran into you. I need your help.” He pulled her aside, leaving the red mare to watch as the two talked.

Back with the two, Lotus spoke with a much firmer tone. “Big bro, I really don’t think this is a good idea. Remember last time?”

“Look, when and who I choose to date is my business. Don’t make it weird, I’m just asking you to take her out around the city for me while I run back and take care of my place!”

“But, bro!” Lotus stomped her hoof down. “I’ve been keeping your place exactly as you left it when you left!”

“That’s what I’m afraid of, you dork!” He pinched her cheek again, earning more whines. “Look, I’m sorry my first day back, I’m already asking favors. I promise I’ll come by later to actually do stuff with you and Uncle Diamond.”

“Hmph… Fine…” The mare pouted and turned towards the direction of Moonshine. “But I’m telling you now, big bro, you’re asking for trouble. The last time you got your heart broken, I lost you for almost a decade. I’m not gonna lose you again…” With that, she wandered off to talk to North’s special somepony, leaving him to think about his last relationship as he wandered outside and called a taxi. He didn’t want to think about that. That was the past. Yet, the memories still stung his heart, and even as he caught a cab and headed out, they never stopped stinging.

~~~

North rushed into the apartment with the panicked vigor of a stallion hiding his erotic magazines from his wife coming home from a business trip. The moment he burst through the doors of his one-room apartment, he was met with a sickening nostalgia that made him cringe. Neighponese comics lay in stacks across the room, making a wall around his futon that lied on the floor. His GameFoal rested on the nightstand, and his kitchen showed the signs of a bachelor stallion: minimal dishware, barren appearance, and packs of noodles everywhere.

Rushing to one of his cabinets, he grabbed some trash bags and started tossing most of his past into one. Comics, games, it was all being discarded. He felt the shame of his creature comforts outside of fighting washing over him, at all the buff stallions beating each other up and fighting games. He tossed each bag next to the front door, then rushed into the closet.

Inside the closet was his greatest treasure, a gift from his uncle that he cherished more than anything. It was a shrine of stone and bronze, moonstones and night imagery adorning every inch of it. The bronze was freshly polished and stones glowed dimly, revealing several prayers in the form of slips of paper littering the cabinet under the shrine. He took one and opened it to read…

~

North Star was lying on a thin mattress, staring up at the ceiling. His body was numb, and his hooves were stained with somepony else’s blood. He blinked slowly as the large championship belt hugged his bandaged waist. His right eye was swollen shut.

To his left, he could see an aged stallion with a dirty 5-o-clock shadow, a slicked-back orange mane, and a crooked grin approach, his back burdened with large saddlebags.

“Very good job, North. You had me kind of worried there in the beginning, but you brutalized him!” He laughed as he set his saddlebags down. “Guess you can retire with your little marefriend a champion, huh?”

North, his ears still ringing, said nothing. He wanted to clench his hooves, but he couldn’t feel them.

“Ah, right. She ditched ya…” The stallion looked down, his smile dropping. “Sorry, didn’t mean to… Listen, you know that you matter a lot to me. You’re family, and I know Lotus loves you a ton. I don’t want you to languish in this place. I think being here, it’s not good for you.”

“Then, where is good for me…?” North muttered hoarsely. “She’s gone, my family hates me, and everypony thinks I’m some violent thug.”

“Eh, true…” The stallion nodded. “But, I got the answer. A present.”

“Uncle Flare, I really don’t want another book-”

His uncle suddenly whipped out two large presents from the bag, one of bright yellow and orange and one of dark blue and purple. He tapped both with a wider grin. “What you got before you is two paths. One of them…” He pointed to the orange-and-yellow box. “... Requires a lot of unlearning. You’ll basically have to forget coming back here. However, with enough training, discipline, and force of will, you can achieve the popularity you truly desire. On the other hand…” He pointed to the dark blue and purple box. “One of them is using everything you’ve learned here and using it to become good. You probably won’t be liked, and nearly everypony in the underground will hate you. But, you’ll still be able to come back, and you’ll catch the attention of ponies who’ll want your help. From there, you can work in your element… Probably.”

“... Probably?”

“Well, there’s a good chance you’ll end up in the dungeon for a long time, but hey…” He shrugged casually. “It’s a gamble. And we don’t go anywhere without a gamble.”

North stared at the two boxes for a long time with his one good eye. He had to seriously consider this option. It was like picking between his parents and his uncle and the underground. He didn’t know what was the best option then, and he had less of a clue now. However, every time he looked between the boxes, the stallion’s gaze would always focus a bit more on the dark box. His hoof moved up, pointing at the dark blue-and-purple gift.

“Ah, good choice…” His uncle slowly opened the box, revealing it to be a small shrine.

“Uncle Flare… What is that?”

“Something that I was planning on giving you, depending on your choice in life. It’s simple, just put a prayer in the little box under it with what you want every day, and you’ll find what you’re looking for.”

North looked at his uncle as if he was insane, but the stallion simply smiled at his nephew and stood up. “Better go take care of my winnings. You rest up and get home when you can. And don’t forget…” Diamond Flare looked back at his nephew. “Every day.”

The young stallion watched his uncle exit, leaving the gift beside him. He wasn’t sure what to make of it or if what his uncle was saying was true, but his mind was in no place to argue. He’d go home, miserable as he recovered. Day by day, he would pray in his closet for a new path, a new direction he could take this life. As his body began to heal, he took to the habit of regular exercise and training, but barely left his room. Diamond Flare and Lotus brought groceries and even some entertainment in the form of comics and games.

Then, his answer would come in the form of a comic: an issue of Dragonling Turtle Samurai, where the young team faced off against a vigilante stallion, Skater Slide. The mask, the use of not only sporting equipment but also any use of the environment, and his willingness to do anything for a safer city spoke to North. It wouldn’t be long before he took to the streets with a new plan filling his mind.

~

North gazed down at the prayer written on the scrap of paper. He prayed to Luna that whole time, hoping for a path forward that would save him. What he received was something beyond what he could comprehend. It was a gamble, but a gamble that paid off. Now, he saw, written neatly on the scrap, a new prayer.

“Princess Luna, please bring my big brother back to me.”

He looked back at the shrine, its glowing stones casting blurry reflections back at him. Am I even the same stallion that left…? North thought to himself. Who am I…? What am I…?

~~~

Moonshine shifted uncomfortably as she looked at the many flowers on display. She wanted to get a bouquet for North when he returned, but like with many other things on this mall visit, she was constantly under the leering gaze of Lotus Dance. Lotus would be at hoof’s distance giving her the evil eye. In an attempt to cut the tension, she turned with a nervous smile toward the young mare.

“S-So, Lotus. Do you think North’s apartment would look better with lighter or darker colored flowers?”

“Hmph…” Lotus turned her head with an indignant huff. “I don’t know. You’re his special somepony. That sounds like something you would know already.”

Luna winced a bit at the verbal jab and sighed. “Perhaps, but I do not know much about his home. He doesn’t talk about his time here in Manehattan very much.”

Lotus seemed to become more incensed by that bit of information, glaring at a bouquet of black dahlias. “Of course, he wouldn’t… He always loves hiding away, never telling anypony anything…”

“Hey, that’s not true. He’s not always like this-”

“What would you know?” Lotus snapped her head towards the mare with an ill gaze. “You don’t even know him.”

Moonshine stepped back, slightly nervous. The emotion she felt coming off of Lotus was intense, and it felt like she was being smothered by the contempt of somepony like her. North, my starshine, I hope this is not how all your family is… She thought to herself. I’m terrified to see what the rest of them will be like! Taking a quick moment to regain her composure, she looked back at Lotus with a stoic gaze.

“Lotus, I can understand that you don’t like me, even if you do not say it…” Moonshine muttered. “However, I believe it is in both of our best interests to remain amicable. I do not want to cause North any stress on his earned vacation.”

Lotus was taken aback by how quickly this nerdy-looking unicorn recovered from the jab, but after some consideration, she turned fully to face Moonshine. “Very well. Just know that I am watching you. If you break his heart…” She stepped closer, her ice-cold aura gripping the other mare as she leaned in to whisper in her ear. “There is nowhere you can run to hide from me…”

The disguised Luna shivered as she felt her spine tingle in fear. She was normally the mare to dish out these ominous threats and warnings. To be on the receiving end was a terrifying experience. If Lotus was weaker than her, she was truly talented at hiding that fact behind her skills of intimidation.

“Darker.”

Moonshine blinked and adjusted her glasses. “W-What?”

“The room is pretty bare, but the walls are a shade of off-white. It would stand to improve with darker colors.”

Blinking in surprise, her lips curled into a small smile. “Thank you. I very much appreciate it.”

Lotus looked away once again right as North ran over. “Hey! Sorry about that, there was some traffic.”

Moonshine smiled as she bought a dark-colored bouquet and held it up to her lover. “Here, darling. Lotus suggested these would be best fitting for your apartment.”

Blinking in surprise, he smiled at his cousin. “Well now, I didn’t think you’d actually get along!”

“Sh-Shut up!” Lotus huffed with pinkening cheeks.

He chuckled and looked back at the bouquet. “They’re lovely, but… I don’t really have anything to put these in.”

“Oh, no worries. We can get a vase as well. Lotus?” Lotus turned to look at Moonshine. “Would you like to stay with us a bit longer?”

Lotus’s eyes narrowed, gazing into the other mare’s soul. However, she would find no ill will inside those words, only a genuine care that made her sigh. “Fine. But afterward, I’m going home. Jichan is probably worried about me.”

North lightly bonked his cousin on the head. “Stop calling Uncle gramps. You know you’re asking for trouble.”

She huffed but continued to follow them, the two shopping as they spent time with her. While there was still venom in her heart, she found that it was starting to fade as she saw how the two showed their love for each other. In the back of her mind, however, she knew that it wasn’t going to last. Then her mind started to focus on what was coming, and while she stayed calm outside, she became internally terrified.

Author's Note

Apologies for the delay. Guess who's got some problems with the university over stuff they can't afford? Yeah, it hasn't been a good time. I'm pretty stressed out with this and some commissions, but progress is being made on them all. I'm very sorry for making promises I couldn't keep. Turns out that when I have time, fate likes to take that time away lol.