"You hopeless idiot."

by TCC56

Rating: teen
Tags: Sad, Romance, Drama, Equestria Girls, Flash Sentry, Midnight Sparkle, Sunset Shimmer, Death
Length: 3180

Flash Sentry has a problematic crush. Sunset tries to help. It does not end well.

Flash Sentry has a problematic crush.

Sunset tries to help.

It does not end well.

Written for the 2023 May Pairings Contest.

A special thanks to EileenSaysHi for their generous editing assistance.

Featured 5/18/2023 - 5/20/2023!

Published 2023-05-18 19:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-05-18 19:10:01 UTC

Chapter 1

It was a beautiful late spring day at Canterlot High. Spirits were high in the wake of the Friendship Games tie, leading the entire school to be just a little bit manic with excitement. Smiles were a little bit wider, songs a little bit louder, and later reviews would show that average grades rose up by a few percentage points that particular month.

And to a certain extent, love was in the air. It was only natural, of course. Everyone was excited and happy, riding the friendship wave. And a building full of teenagers naturally results in a network of relationships that less resembles a spider's web and more a ball of yarn: one where every strand touches every other at a thousand points.

It was in that circumstance that Flash Sentry pulled Sunset Shimmer aside in the hall to talk to her.

She could tell from the first moment that this was going to be a Friendship Problem: one did not look so downtrodden without something going wrong, and his lack of energy was all the more notable compared to how bouncy and excited the rest of CHS was. (It didn't help that Sunset knew from experience how powerful Flash's sad puppy face could be - it had knocked her out of more than one scheme during her evil days.)

"Okay, what's going on." She cut to the chase quickly - she had things to do before he had yanked her into a quiet side-hall. (Honestly, not that much, but sad Flash was not something Sunset wanted to deal with.)

Flash let out a long-suffering sigh. "I need your help."

Sunset rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I guessed that. With what, exactly?"

Another sigh. "With a girl."

Ah. Sunset frowned. "Which one?"

There, Flash shifted uneasily and hesitated. "It's kind of embarrassing…"

Now it was Sunset's turn to let out a long-suffering sigh. "Okay Flash, look. I understand. I get it. What you're feeling is entirely understandable."

"...It is?"

Sunset put a calming hand on Flash's shoulder. "It is. But you gotta face reality, buddy. No matter how amazing Twilight is, she's a princess who lives in another dimension. Long distance relationships are hard enough without dimensional barriers in the way. Also, she's a horse."

There was a brief moment of confusion before Flash patted Sunset's hand, acknowledging her friendly assistance. "Yeah, I know. She's got a million billion responsibilities back home and it isn't fair to either of us. Spending time together at all would be a chore, and that's just not a good way to build a relationship." He paused. "And yeah, she's also a horse. But!" Flash held up a finger with his other hand. "She isn't who I wanted to talk to you about. I know that was just a crush that was never going anywhere."

"Oh." Sunset pursed her lips. And without bothering to think about it, she rallied to try again. "Just because she's human doesn't make the other Twilight a better choice, Flash. I know she shares names and some aspects with the princess, but they're two entirely different people."

"Sunset, I–"

"She's already dealing with enough imposter syndrome," Sunset continued heedlessly. "And I know it has to be rough for you. Having that reminder of what you had with Princess Twilight right in front of you, with the same face but as a different person. But you need to understand and respect Twilight as her own individual. And she doesn't feel that way about you." The last bit she added with just enough blush to be a reminder that someone already had a crush of their own.

Flash closed his eyes and took a long, deep breath. "I know. Sunset, I would never put that kind of pressure on Twilight. She's already got enough on her shoulders with everything that happened. Between the Games, her transferring schools, dealing with Princess Twilight's legacy, and, uh." His eyes opened and flickered to Sunset's blush. "Everything else? I don't want to add to her problems. And I understand that they're different people! I'm looking forward to getting to know this Twilight Sparkle - as a friend."

He smiled warmly, and Sunset did right back.

Then there was a flash of panic on Sunset's face. "Okay just to be clear, it's been great to reconnect with you but–"

"But we're better as friends than we ever were together," Flash completed, interrupting Sunset before she could go too far down that road. "I agree. It was mostly a good time when we were together, but I don't think we could ever get that back. Too many things went bad near the end, and your, uh…"

"Evil sociopathy," Sunset far too quickly supplied.

Flash frowned sharply. "Your problems at the time kind of tainted it all. We're not the same people we were then."

He smiled warmly. Sunset, grudgingly, did so right back.

"Yeah," she agreed. "We're not the same people."

"Also, you've got someone else on your mind."

Sunset blushed. "Yeah."

Both of them were quiet for a moment, basking in the friendly glow.

Then Sunset ruined it by bull-rushing forward. "So is it Derpy? You two have been hanging around together a lot lately and I know she's always been a good friend of yours. The two of you would–"

Flash put his hand over Sunset's mouth. "Okay, you win. This is cringe enough that you've overcome my embarrassment."

Practically trembling with eagerness, Sunset watched as Flash pulled out his phone. He scrolled far too slowly for her tastes, dangling the juicy answer in front of her for agonizing seconds. Then, finally, he pulled up the right photo. There was a moment's final hesitation before he turned the screen around to show Sunset his new crush.

Sunset stared for several uncomprehending seconds before she was finally able to find the words. "Midnight Sparkle."

"...yeah."

"You're crushing on Midnight Sparkle."

Flash nodded in lovestruck gloominess.

Very gently, Sunset facepalmed. "Oh my Celestia. Flash, you hopeless idiot."

Nothing more was said on the topic for several weeks. It was dropped, disappearing into the aether of high school life and thankfully not resurfacing to be yet another thing someone would use to poke fun at Flash.

Until Camp Everfree.

The Crystal Ball had ended, leaving most of the attendees to slump off for the night. Only a handful remained: primarily the Rainbooms. Flash, of course, was there as well - he couldn't leave all of the cleanup to the girls.

Midway through sweeping up yet more Pinkie Pie streamers, Sunset approached and signaled she wanted to talk in her usual forward manner: she grabbed the end of the broom and stopped Flash's work dead. A lesser man would have been annoyed at the interruption (and the delay in him getting to a well-earned bed), but Flash Sentry was the eternal gentleman and Sunset could totally beat him up. So he merely looked her dead in the eye and patiently waited for her to speak.

"You need to come to our tent tonight."

It was not the opening Flash had expected. Cheeks bright red, he shook his head rapidly. "Sunset, I, uh, I'm flattered, but I really don't think that–"

Sunset facepalmed. "Flash you idiot, I'm not propositioning you." She paused, hand lifting away to reveal confusion in her eyes. "...I don't think I'm propositioning you. At least not like you think I am."

And that made Flash confused as well. "Wait, so this isn't jealousy about Twilight and Timber–"

Sunset clapped her hand over Flash's mouth. "Don't even, Sentry. Do not finish that sentence." He flashed her a thumbs up of understanding and she took her hand away. "Lemme try again from the start." She took a step back, resetting her position. "Flash, I want you to come to our tent tonight because I'm going to do you a favor. I treated you really badly for most of the time we've known each other, and making it up to you is something I've wanted to do for a while. So tonight with Twilight's help, I'm going to give you a date with your crush."

Images of Midnight Sparkle - terrible and beautiful - flashed through his mind. But the confusion remained behind the way his eager heart skipped. "I don't understand. Twilight's not… I mean, she can't be…" He shook his head. "I don't get it."

Patiently, Sunset held up the new geode amulet she had gained the day before. "I can bridge the gap between you two. Midnight may not be in the real world, but she's been haunting Twilight's dreams ever since the Games. With this thing, I think I can let you in there, too."

The situation started to take shape - but Flash still hesitated. "But what about Twilight? She's okay with this?"

"She is." Sunset nodded. "Dealing with Gaea Everfree helped her get over her problems with Midnight's legacy. Twilight's more confident and in control now, so she thinks she can handle it." A wry (and slightly disappointed) little smirk floated across the girl's lips. "Plus she's gotten a taste of love herself, and I think that's got her motivated to try and help her darker half."

He should say no. Flash knew that. This was undeniably doomed, because even if everything went perfectly, Midnight Sparkle still wasn't real. But at the same time, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity. And as much as Flash had pushed the crush down? Midnight was too enticing to be completely expelled from his mind.

"Alright," he said after a long hesitation. "Let's do it."

The tent - like the whole of the camp - was dead quiet. Everyone collapsing into bed cast a silence over it all that defied common sense when so many teenagers were gathered in one place. And the abnormal ominousness of it made Flash Sentry even more nervous.

"You're sure about this?" His question was pointed towards Twilight - he had given up on the slim chance that Sunset would have second thoughts. She so rarely did.

Twilight, for her part, nodded. She was uneasy too - biting her lower lip and eyes constantly going to Sunset for reassurance. "I'm sure." She sounded as certain as a calf headed into a slaughterhouse.

Sunset calmly guided the two into place: Twilight in her bed and Flash on a cot that had been hastily set up. "Now, I'm going to just sit between you two with a hand on each of your arms. If I understand how this works right, that should allow me to be a bridge between your subconscious dreaming minds."

Neither one of them asked Sunset what would happen if she was wrong about how it worked. Both knew the human-unicorn prodigy well enough to know she would just cover up the doubt with a confident smile and a pithy reassurance.

So they laid down. They tried to relax. And thankfully, exhaustion overtook them both to bring sleep quickly and easily.

It was an abrupt change from Flash's perspective. One moment he was looking up at the ceiling of the Sapphire Tent. He blinked, and it was a deserted island. And it was perhaps the most archetypical deserted island one could imagine: a small rise of generic sand in the middle of an endless ocean. Only perhaps ten meters across, it lacked any distinguishing features beyond a single coconut-laiden palm tree and the woman huddled in its meager shade.

While the island's comically stereotypical features were a signal that this was a dream, the woman's state made clear that it wasn't a good one. When Flash had last seen Midnight Sparkle, she had been at the height of her glory. Now she was curled up in a fetal ball, arms wrapped around her legs, face buried against her knees, and raven black wings limply hanging over her like a damp cloak. Her glasses and horn still flickered with cyan flame, but they were the only thing about Midnight that sparkled.

Flash took a step towards her.

"I know why you're here." She didn't raise her head as she spoke, voice flat as the island. "I can see and hear everything that Twilight can." There was a pause. "What I don't understand is why."

"Why?"

"Why," Midnight repeated. "You have terrible taste in romantic partners, but that still doesn't explain this. We never spoke. Never interacted. You were one face in a crowd I barely noticed at the height of my victory. Are your pathetic hormones so entranced by a bit of skin that you'll go to these lengths? Or do you only care because I'm the third-string Twilight after the other two rejected you?"

Cautiously closing the handful of steps between them, Flash sat down in the sand beside Midnight. He stayed close but not touching, giving her that little bit of respectful distance. "I won't lie and say you aren't attractive," he awkwardly began, "But that isn't why. It's actually how you remind me of Sunset rather than of Twilight."

Midnight's head rose slightly, letting her peek one curious eye out from the crook of her elbow.

Flash leaned backwards, hands splayed out in the sand as he looked to the cloudless sky. "Back when I was with Sunset, I knew she was pretty bad. Even I'm not dense enough to miss how she was manipulative and cruel. She had a massive ego, she held grudges until the end of the earth, and she barely noticed anybody else unless they were a problem to be disposed of or a tool to be used. But she was also the most brilliant person I had ever met. She was confident, driven, and - again I won't lie - extremely attractive. So when she decided to use me to gain popularity and power, I looked at this intelligent, beautiful person and said…" A sardonic grin came to his lips. "'I can fix her.'"

Very quietly, Midnight snickered.

And Flash did, too. "Yeah, I know. But it turns out, I was right. I just didn't know how - thankfully, Princess Twilight did. She fixed Sunset and helped her become the absolutely amazing woman she is today." He turned his head, meeting that mostly hidden eye. "And seeing you is like watching it all over again. You're attractive, brilliant, confident, driven–"

"Egotistical," Midnight quickly supplied.

"...I was gonna say enthusiastic, but I guess you aren't wrong."

"Logically next would be a difficult one, as I'm not particularly fair or faithful."

His grin widened a little. "Funny, maybe. Or fortunate."

"Fortunate?"

Flash nodded. "Princess Twilight taught me a thing or two about how to fix an amazing woman who needs a little help. Mostly by using another F - friendship."

Midnight snorted at the word and slumped her head back into hiding again. "I'm not certain which I dislike more: that idiotic concept or that you ruined the alphabetical progression of descriptive adjectives."

"Honestly? I thought you'd be more upset at being described as something to be fixed." Flash shrugged blandly.

Her knife-sharp laugh slashed across the conversation. "I obviously need fixing. Look at what my life is: I've been crushed by a gaggle of moronic high schoolers twice using nothing but feel-good words and empty promises of a lackluster future where Twilight gives up all-encompassing knowledge for sleepovers." Midnight scoffed. "Not that it matters. I'm going to cease to exist soon."

Flash's brow furrowed, his eyes darting around the tiny island. "You are?"

One hand waved vaguely at their surroundings. "This is all that's left of me. I was a goddess for a few minutes, before Sunset's interference broke my hold on Twilight. At least after the Friendship Games I had a safe refuge within the recesses of her mind. Now she's conquered me once more and driven me out. All I have left is this tiny toe-hold and it's disintegrating. She doesn't want me, she doesn't need me, she doesn't fear me - so her mind is expunging my existence and subsuming me back into her psyche. I've already faded to the point where she can't hear my whispers anymore." Her knees curled closer, tightening the ball. "All I can do is sit here and wait to die while her friends cheer about her becoming a better person without me."

For a long time - though the precise amount was unclear thanks to the foggy nature of dreams - Flash Sentry sat there in silent contemplation. The island around them slowly shrank, eroded one grain of sand at a time. Eventually he settled on a question. "Can I give you a hug?"

Slumped shoulders shrugged.

Flash inched a little closer and put an arm across Midnight in a side-hug. "You just seem like you could use one."

"Because I'm dying?"

"Because you deserve to not be alone."

They were quiet again.

She leaned slightly against him.

He leaned back, giving her more support.

The first sob was nearly silent. The quickly growing waterfall that followed was not.

Midnight cried in his arms and Flash held on as best he could, looping his other arm around her.

In time, she regained control - at least somewhat. Enough so that she could form words. "I don't want to die," she whispered. "There's so much more to learn. I want to see it all. I want to know everything! I… I…" She trailed away, her whole body slumping against Flash.

He looked up - the waves were lapping against his toes, now. Flash bit his lip and turned back to the girl he was holding. "What is it?"

Midnight let out a resigned sigh. "I don't want to be alone. Curse Sunset Shimmer to eternal kindergarten, she was right."

A moment of silence.

"Damn." Flash's quiet curse got Midnight to finally raise her head and look at him. "Uh, I was kind of hoping that would trigger something," he shamefully admitted. "Like you accepted friendship and suddenly you'd be saved or something. Big flash of light, the island re-appearing, that sort of thing."

Midnight laughed. An actual, honest laugh. "This isn't a fairy tale, Flash Sentry. Even if it was, I'm the wicked witch and they don't get happy endings." Leaning close, she kissed his cheek. It was quick and chaste, but still a kiss. "You hopeless idiot."

Flash smiled.

Another moment.

"...stay until I'm gone?"

He nodded.

In each other's arms, they watched the sea as it slowly rose and consumed the land.

Author's Note

Originally, this story was just a short comedy bit - just the section before the first break. But after reading a story from the Spring Fling contest, I was inspired to take it a step further.

Then I realized that Flash/Midnight was actually pretty rare as a pairing: they only share 8 stories site-wide, half of which are porn and only one of which actually has the characters properly interact. Figured this could be some nice pathos. (Though seriously I need to do a comedy next, my stories are getting far too bittersweet.)