You're Dating WHO?

by ShowShine

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Starswirl the Bearded, Twilight Velvet, Slice of Life, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance
Length: 1874

Twilight Velvet has big news, and she wants her daughter to be a part of it. Unfortuntely, Twilight doesn't take it well

Twilight Velvet has big news and she wants her daughter to be a part of it. Unfortunately, Twilight doesn't take it well. In fact, she takes it horribly

Written for May Pairing Contest 2023

Published 2023-05-30 07:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-05-30 07:30:00 UTC

Yuck!

Twilight Sparkle was many things. She was a student, a princess, a mentor, and a dear friend. But right now, Twilight was like a scared child. Terrified, actually. She sat across from her mother, her heart hammering in her chest. She didn’t know why she was so nervous. This was just a normal mother-daughter hang out, nothing more.

Being in her childhood home didn’t help her nerves one bit. Sitting at the table reminded her of the many scoldings she received as a filly.

Nothing strange about her mom calling her over for ‘something important.’ And it surely wasn’t weird that Shining Armor wasn’t here for such an important meet-up.

“Is something wrong, dear? You look nervous.” Velvet asked, snapping Twilight from her thoughts. Twilight jumped, feeling like she had been caught in a terrible deed.

“Why did you call me over? Is it something bad? Oh, Celestia, are you sick?” Twilight lunged forward, pressing her hoof on her mother's forehead. Velvet gently moved her daughter's hoof, placing it on the table.

“Oh, honey, no, there’s nothing wrong.” She reassured. “I just have some…exciting news.”

Twilight frowned. She hated when her mother had ‘exciting news.’ The last time Velvet had news, she had signed them up for a mountain climbing class. Twilight shuddered at the thought. She could still feel the chill of the mountain air on her wings.

“Now…you know I love your father…” Velvet started. Twilight’s breath hitched.

“Are you and Dad getting a divorce?” She squeaked in horror. Velvet looked at her daughter with wide eyes, putting her hoof to her chest.

“Oh, heavens no! I wouldn’t even dream of such a thing.” Velvet reassured. Twilight gave a relieved sigh. “...But…”

Buts aren’t good. Buts are never good. Buts always added something terrible, like a fine print in a contract.

“But?” Twilight mimicked.

“But you know how stale marriages can get. Sometimes we want to try something new.” Velvet started. “So that’s why your father and I opened our marriage.”

She blinked in surprise. Twilight had read about open marriages a few times, but she never thought her parents would do such a thing.

“I’m…happy for you two?” It sounded more like a question than a genuine compliment. But what was Twilight meant to do? These were her parents. She didn’t even want to see them kiss. The idea of them dating around was…odd for her.

“That’s not the only reason I called you over. I…I want you to meet my boyfriend today.” Velvet strained a smile.

Twilight blinked.

“Today is soon, but…” Twilight trailed off. She looked at her mother, who wore a hopeful smile on her face. She sighed. “Ok, I’ll do it. What time are we going to meet? Lunch? Dinner?”

“In about five minutes.”

“Five minutes!?” Twilight gasped.

“I know it’s sudden, but I think it’s important that you meet him.” Velvet hastily explained.

Twilight anxiously gnawed at her hoof. Right now wasn’t ideal in the slightest. Her mane was unkept, and her feathers hadn’t been preened in weeks. She glanced at her mother, who had a hopeful look in her eyes.

Twilight sighed, rubbing her hooves together. She’s the Princess of Friendship; she could handle meeting a new pony. Especially someone as important as her mother's boyfriend. Besides, it would mean a lot to her mom.

“Okay, I’ll meet him,” Twilight said, sitting up straight. Velvet beamed, hopping from her chair.

“I’ll go get him!” She squealed happily. Velvet skipped down the hallway.

Twilight listened as her mom traveled down the hallway. She hoped that the stallion her mom chose was sensible. What if her mom chose someone as adventurous as her? She shuddered at the thought. Twilight doesn’t think she could handle another harrowing family vacation.

The alicorn leaned into her hoof, tapping her chin. Maybe he’s a researcher like her, studying the secrets and history of Equestria.

Multiple hoofsteps traveled down the hallway, snapping Twilight from her thoughts. She sat straight in her seat, patting down her messy hair. No matter who this stallion was, she needed to look presentable. First impressions were everything, after all.

“Hello, Twilight.” Someone greeted. Twilight turned to face the mystery stallion, giving him a greeting smile. Her smile dropped, and her eyes practically bulged out of her head.

“STARSWIRL!?” Twilight shrieked. Velvet cringed at her daughters' sudden outburst.

“This is why we needed to have this discussion now.” Velvet sighed. Twilight’s jaw hung open, and she stared in awe. If she wasn’t already sitting, her legs would’ve given out under her.

Twilight stared at the pair in pure disbelief. Her mom is dating Starswirl. Her idol, the stallion she looked up to for years, was…dating her mom.She could feel her brain malfunctioning.

This wasn’t right. Her family life and her magic life were two separate things. They should never mix. That was just the standard rule of life!

“Twilight? Are you okay?” Velvet asked, placing her hoof on her daughter's back. Twilight remained silent, staring at the floor with wide eyes. “I knew I should’ve made some chamomile tea before breaking the news.” Velvet scolded herself.

Starswirl nuzzled Velvet’s cheek.

“Don’t blame yourself, dear. You could not have known she’d react this way.” Starswirl reassured. Velvet sighed, leaning into his chest. Twilight’s eyes flickered to her idol.

“You’re dating my mom…” Twilight muttered, the reality of the situation finally settling in. Starswirl nodded, nervously fiddling with his beard.

“I know this is a …sudden development, but-”

“What do you two see in each other?” Twilight blurt. There had to be some reason they were together.

“Twilight!” Velvet gasped.

“Starswirl, you’re an amazing teacher and an even better sorcerer. What made you want to settle down with a housewife? I mean, you had so many more options. Why not another powerful sorcerer? Or an archivist?!” Twilight attempted to reason, turning to her mom.

“And you love adventure! Why would you go with him? He doesn’t have an adventurous bone in his body! I mean yeah, Starswirl went on adventures, but that was only because he was researching!” She rambled, throwing her hooves into the air.

Velvet and Starswirl stared at Twilight in shock. Starswirl snorted, covering his mouth. As sudden as that outburst was, Starswirl couldn’t help but find it amusing.

“I can assure you, Twilight, you do not know everything about me.” Starswirl chuckled. “I appreciate your mother because of her sense of adventure.”

“Aaaw, honey.” Velvet blushed. “And I appreciate Starswirl for his smarts.” She sighed wistfully. “He reminds me of your father in a way.”

“Night Light is rather charming.” Starswirl agreed. Twilight snapped her attention to Starswirl.

“Are you dating my dad too?”

“We’ve had…relations on a few occasions. Like that time we-” Starswirl bashfully admitted. Twilight retched, covering her mouth.

“Stop, stop, stop! I don’t need to know that!” She shouted, covering her ears. Velvet couldn’t help but chuckle at her daughter’s reaction.

“Right, I forgot that speaking of that stuff is seen as taboo nowadays.” Starswirl reminded himself. Velvet gave Starswirl a reassuring pat.

“It’s fine, honey, you just forgot. Everyone makes mistakes.” She reassured. Starswirl smiled, kissing Velvet’s cheek.

“Oh, you’re such a gentleman!” Velvet complimented, returning the kiss. Before Twilight knew it, the pair broke into a fit of playful flirting and kissing.

Twilight’s eye twitched, and her head began to ache. She couldn’t believe this. It felt like two worlds were colliding. She averted her gaze, looking for anything to focus on. Looking at those two made her feel nauseous.

Her eyes landed on a photo that hung on a wall. On a passing glance, this wouldn’t seem like anything special. But it was a picture of her mom and Starswirl. Specifically, a picture of the vacation. If memory served her right, they went on that vacation last year. Why would Starswirl have been with her parents? This would’ve been way before they started dating.

Twilight shook her head. No, no, maybe they just went as friends. Of course! Friends went on vacations all the time. Despite this satisfying conclusion, Twilight couldn’t help but feel she was missing something.

The more the alicorn looked, the more she noticed. Why were there three mugs in the sink? Not only that, but there were only three chairs set up at the dining room table. Didn’t her parents only bring out extra chairs for guests?

Now that she was really paying attention, she noticed there were a plethora of items in sets of three. Three pillows on the couch, three chairs in the living room, three of everything.

Twilight knew that her parents got rid of extra furniture when she and her brother moved out. They said it ‘made the space breathable.’ With all of this extra stuff, that can only mean one thing.

“Starswirl…do you live here?” Twilight asked. Starswirl and Velvet broke from their flirting, exchanging worried glances. The couple remained silent, much to Twilight's dismay.

“Well?”

“It appears you have caught me.” Starswirl sighed. Twilight furrowed her brows. That didn’t make any sense! This was a fresh relationship, wasn’t it? No sane couple would move in with each other before the first year.

“How long have you two been dating, exactly?” Twilight interrogated. Starswirl adverted his gaze, and Velvet began to run her hooves through her hair. Twilight’s eyes widened. She only did that when she was nervous!

“W-well, we don’t really define our relationship with time-” Velvet started, dancing around the subject.

“How long have you two been dating?” Twilight repeated, flaring her wings. The room fell silent.

“...A few months before your coronation.” Starswirl bashfully admitted.

“A few months before my…?” Twilight mumbled confusedly. “My coronation was a year and a half ago!” Twilight wailed. Velvet brought her hooves up to her face.

“I know we should’ve told you sooner, but so much happened that year! With the elements being destroyed and you becoming the ruler of Equestria, I thought it would just be too much.” Velvet rambled.

Twilight stared at the table. That was it…her life was ruined. Her idol was dating her mom, and now he’s going to be her stepdad. She would see him every time she visited home. She was going to have to give him Father’s Day presents.

“Oh, I knew I should’ve done this sooner. I shouldn’t have listened to Shining Armor.” Velvet muttered. Twilight whipped her attention to her mother.

“Shining Armor knows?” Twilight gaped. Velvet quickly covered her mouth.

“Oh dear, did I say that out loud?” She gasped. “Twilight honey, the whole family knows. We waited to tell you because we know how you can get.”

Twilight stared at the table, her mind racing a mile a minute. This was all too much information for one day. Heck, this was too much information for a lifetime.

“Mom…I just want to know; Why did you decide to tell me now of all times?” Twilight asked. Velvet cringed at the question, nervously brushing her hoof through her hair.

“Well…” She squeaked, “I’m pregnant with Starswirl’s child.”

Twilight fainted, tumbling out of her seat. She hit the kitchen floor with a large ‘thud.’

Velvet gasped, peeking over the table.

“I knew we should’ve waited until after the baby was born.”