He was a chaperone, he should have been watching her. But he had failed her, failed their parents. It was supposed to be a fun end of the year trip but it ended in tragedy. Tragedy that he could have prevented if he had been more careful. Everypony kept telling him it was an accident and not his fault, but it was his fault that she died. He betrayed her, betrayed their parents, betrayed his filly sister, betrayed his Apple Bloom.
~~~~~~~~~~
The ill-fated trip to the pond was ingrained into his memory. Cheerilee was taking roll call and Apple Bloom was missing. Big Mac and one of the unicorn chaperones went to look for her. Apple Bloom was still in the pond , face down. He ran into the pond and started to be dragged down. Whirlpool. The unicorn levitated Apple Bloom out of the whirlpool and Big Mac was able to get himself out of it. Apple Bloom wasn’t breathing, she looked so small on the beach. So small, so weak. He scooped her up and ran her to the hospital hoping and praying she could be saved.
~~~~~~~~~
He refused to leave her bedside the week she was on life support. Holding her hoof, singing to her, telling her he was sorry. She looked so tiny in that hospital bed connected to all of those machines. AJ offered to stay with Apple Bloom during the night so he could go home to sleep. But Big Mac refused to leave Apple Bloom’s side. It was his fault after all. Brain dead. Apple Bloom was brain dead. His sweet, adventurous, mischievous, kind, smart, filly sister was brain dead. The mass that laid in the hospital bed wasn’t his sweet little baby sister. But an empty husk. He should have been that empty husk, not Apple Bloom. He got to hold Apple Bloom when her life support was shut off. Held her as her last breath left her weak body. She looked so peaceful in his hooves, as if she just taking a nap. But she wasn’t sleeping she was dead. She was dead and it was his fault.
~~~~~~
Apple Bloom was laid to rest wearing her Crusader’s cape. Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle and Babs Seed all wear their capes to the funeral as a sign of respect for their fallen crusader. Big Mac was stony faced, he had ran out of tears. He went up to the tiny coffin and kissed the filly’s ice cold forehead one last. He undid her hair bow and tied ribbon around his foreleg. AJ saw this and gave him a small, pained smile. If felt like the whole town was there to pay their respects to the little filly. Ponyville was a close knit community, everypony knew everypony. Everypony was offering their support to the Apple family. Big Mac sat still as he listened to the speeches. Cheerilee gave a speech about how Apple Bloom was a great student, Zecora gave a speech about how Apple Bloom was such an inquisitive and kind filly, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo talked about how great of a friend Apple Bloom was and how they hoped she had her cutie mark in the afterlife. Various foals, cousins and anypony that personally knew Apple Bloom gave speeches.In her short life Bloomy had touched the hearts of so many ponies. Then it was the immediate family’s turn to give their speeches, AJ went first, then Granny went. It was Big Mac’s turn, there was so much he wanted to say so much but he couldn’t. He managed more tears he didn’t know he had. He broke down not being able to speak about his youngest sister. AJ put a hoof round him and helped him back to his seat. After the service the family got one more look at Apple Bloom before closing her little coffin. Big Mac watched as various cousins lowered her coffin into her grave. He put a few apple blossoms on her coffin before shoving some dirt into her grave. Big Mac saw the line of ponies wanting to help bury sweet little Apple Bloom.
~~~~~~
Somehow, some way life started to go one. Summer came and went. The new school year started. Started without Apple Bloom. She wasn’t begging for a new saddle bag or asking for a special beginning of the year lunch. Big Mac stood in the kitchen making a lunch for Bloomy. He didn’t know why he was making her lunch but he had to. He had to get Apple Bloom ready for school. He just had to. He went up to Bloomy’s bedroom, a bedroom that hasn’t changed since the incident. He had gotten her a brand new saddle bag. A truly new saddle bag not a hand-me-down from AJ or a second hand one from the thrift store. Brand new with the tags still on. He sat on Apple Bloom’s bed, it still smell like her. He held back his tears. She should have been getting ready for the first day of school, but she was six feet underground. He looked at the saddle bag by the foot of the bed. The saddle bag she packed for the day she died. The last time that bag was touched was when it placed there. No pony could go through it, it caused to much pain. Some day they could go through it but today was not that day. Big Mac got off of the bed and made it before leaving the bedroom.
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Although time doesn’t make the pain go away did lessen it. Lessen it for some ponies at least. A few months after the incident Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo started crusading again, trying to get their cutie marks in memory of Apple Bloom. AJ went back to work and being with her friends. Although she cried herself to sleep most nights AJ was acting the same way she did before the incident. Granny, well no pony really knew what was up with her. She seemed to be doing ok but it was hard to tell. Zecora came over once or twice a month for dinner. She seemed to be doing alright. It seemed that only pony not going ok was Big Mac. As much as he tried he couldn’t move on. He couldn’t stop believing it was his fault. He tried to stop believing it, but he kept seeing Apple Bloom’s tiny body on the beach when he closed his eyes. The noise of the machines kept ringing in his ears. He couldn’t let go. He couldn’t let go of his filly sister.
~~~~~~~~
The first year was the longest. The second year was slow but not nearly was slow as the first. Half way through the third year Scootaloo got her cutie mark, a year later Sweetie Belle got her’s. Big Mac didn’t go to either Cuteceañera. It caused him too much pain. Bloomy would never get Cuteceañera. During the sixth year AJ got married, the mare of honor was left empty as a sign of respect for Apple Bloom. The seventh year Granny passed away due to old age. Later that same year Big Mac met the mare that would be his wife. A beautiful and caring pegasus from Fillydephia. They married during the eighth year. AJ became a mother to a little colt named Fuji Apple during the ninth year. On the tenth anniversary of the worse day of his life, Big Mac became a father. A father to a little pegasus filly. He cried when he laid eyes on his daughter. She looked just like her Auntie Apple Bloom. Ten years after he lost his Apple Bloom she came back as his daughter. His daughter, his Angel Blossom.
