The Adventures of Nora the Human Prostitute

"I just wanted to make sure you're alright."

Twilight was being obstinate again. The purple pegacorn - was that the right word? - circled Nora energetically in the air, doting like a concerned parent.

"I already told you I'm fine, Twi. Something just... came up."

It wasn't really a lie. Lyra had diverted her attention well and truly; she couldn't be blamed for that.

Turns out, her friends got the wrong end of the stick about her not showing up last night. They weren't mad at her, but they may as well have been - she felt guilty enough either way. While they hadn't said as much, images of the gang making feeble attempts to start the fun inbetween worrying silly about her flooded her mind. She saw the ever-impatient Dash doing laps in the high halls, unable to start any games while the others insisted they wait for her. She saw Fluttershy watching the clock inbetween sips of punch, wondering if something had happened to her. She always fussed over Nora when she didn't need to. Sometimes she wondered if the pegasus saw her as another one of her animal friends to watch over, though if so, she was sure she didn't mean it in a dismissive way. And finally, she saw Pinkie, looking sadly at a piece of chocolate cake, unable to bring herself to eat it, probably declaring that it reminded her of Nora. Imagining Pinkie sad was always the worst. The pictures played in her head like a haunted theater, apparitions of her pony playmates spooking her at every turn.

The guilt was currently buried under a thick gravel of frustration, however. While playing hooky with your friends was hardly proper etiquette, it wasn't like she made a habit of ditching them. This was a one off. While she reserved plenty of time for her carnal adventures, she was always good enough to warn the girls in advance if she wouldn't be attending one of their little soirees - except last night, of course. Twi in particular had been riding her hard about it, and not the kind of riding she was used to.

"We're just concerned, Nora! It feels like you haven't been yourself lately..." she trailed off, coming to a stop in front of her, blocking her path. Nora had stopped by the castle to try and explain herself, but despite having the whole morning to plan her excuse, no good reasons came to her. Bad dreams kept her up, so she slept horribly, and was a tad grouchy to show for it. Then pitted against Twilight's own headstrong worrywarting, sparks were flying.

"It feels like you've been kind of distracted," she went on.

Yeah, by your sexy-ass brother, maybe.

"You've been spacing out quite a lot, and it feels like we've seen less and less of you since you moved out on your own."

The alicorn - yes, that was the word - placed a comforting hoof on the woman's shoulder, making deep eye contact.

"I know it must be hard, being in your position, and while you never let it show, it must bother you, being away from home. When you still had Applejack to keep an eye on you, that was one thing, but-"

"So, what, you think I need a minder? Like I'm some foal?" she barked, annoyed. Injecting the word foal into that sentence still felt unnatural, but she hoped that making a conscious effort of meeting Twilight on her own linguistic terms would punctuate her point.

"Not at all!" she replied, face betraying no dishonesty in her statement, aghast at the implication. "It's just, we-"

That was it.

"We, we, we. That's all it is. Why can't you admit it's just you, Twilight?"

Nora stormed off in a rush, hearing no attempts to call out to her, not that she'd have been responsive either way. This was fucking typical. She came by for a quick hello, and to offer something of an apology, and she'd gotten a grilling and an argument for her troubles.

Making haste for the door, she sulked out.

Nora skipped rocks, angrily. It wasn't a productive use of her time, but she didn't really have any better plans right now. She had felt some remorse at how she handled Twilight before she'd even finished closing her lips, but she was too prideful to turn back her words right there and then. And besides, while the princess' intentions were pure, the helicopter mom routine was a little much. She didn't treat her like this when they first met. At least, not too often.

She had a sinking feeling in her gut, like there was more to her friends' gestures than they let show. She hoped it was speculative on their part, and that they weren't getting wise to her. Who knew how they would look at her if they knew what a whore she was.

It was strange... as much as Nora had shattered so many of her original preconceptions about pony innocence and purity, their society was so outwardly non-sexual that she still felt compelled to keep her secret. It's not like being known as a slut was any easier back on Earth, but here, she felt like she had people to disappoint. She didn't want that. Sure, her sexual renaissance sparked by her first taste of stallion had bumped up her opinion of Equestria a few notches, but it wasn't all there was to the place. Even for someone with such a fiery desire, there was more to life. The blue skies; the friendly smiling faces, ready to greet one another without any sinister undertones or unwarranted prejudice; the laughter; the joy of the little ponies as the waddled out of the schoolhouse; the way even the animals here seemed to live in harmony with everything. The tranquility of the lake, which she was destroying with her mineral bombardment.

"Oh," she said, sensing that her last throw had a touch more gusto than she had intended. The rock, rather than skipping daintily, plopped down menacingly, disturbing a mother duck at the front of a line of little yellow waterfowl. "...Sorry," she added, sheepishly.

Nora looked up at nothing and sighed. Today could only get better.

"Screw this," she resolved. "I need a drink."

The bar wasn't busy, being afternoon and all. Ponies had work... well, the ones who worked, anyway. This town was odd like that. She couldn't quite figure out how Fluttershy's animal husbandry paid her bills. She worked hard, no question, but she didn't have a boss or a business, so what she did to actually pay her way, Nora didn't know. Parental support, maybe? She had heard Fluttershy talk about her mom and dad, once or twice. And a brother. She idly wondered if he'd be worth looking up.

Taking a swig of the brew she held in hand, she drowned her sorrows gladly. It hadn't solved any of her problems, and yet she felt all the better for it.

As she lowered the glass tankard of ale from her face, she felt the tickle of foam on her upper lip. Caring not about table manners at a time like this, she licked it off.

"Well hey there, doll, why so down?"

The sing-song voice startled her out of her wallowing, jumping in her seat as a stranger's hoof snaked its way over her right shoulder. She followed the yellow tendril up to a thin face, haloed by red strands of hair and some sort of straw hat.

"And, why, I thought this was a cider town!" declared a similar voice to her left, history repeating as the other pony leaned in on her arm, leaving her flanked by the pair of stallions. This one had a red mustache to match the mane, but otherwise looked identical. Nora always thought mustahces looked kind of weird on ponies. It felt too... human? Like it didn't belong. She didn't let herself get distracted by that for long, though.

"Uh..."

Just what does one say in this situation?

"Can I help you?"

The question seemed to linger in the air, as though the pair couldn't believe their ears. They looked at one another around her head, and then back at her again.

"Well, missy, my dear old brother and I," began the mustachioed one.

"That's I!" piped up his counterpart.

"That's he," he went on. They spoke almost like a hive-mind. Spooky. "Well, we-"

"That's me!"

"-And me, well we just so happened to see..."

Nora felt like they were on the verge of bursting into song. She hated it when that happened. No one clues the human in on the intricacies of the choreography that everyone else apparently rehearses when she isn't looking. She hadn't been the focal point any any musical numbers yet, and this would not be that day.

"Y'know, I think I've got to be somewhere," she said, standing up from her barstool, taking specific care not to say 'somewhere to be' lest she set them off again. The foppish siblings went wide-eyed at this.

"Wait, miss!" said brother number one.

"Please desist!" chimed in brother number two.

"Whaaaat?" she groaned. Apparently she couldn't even have a bit of self-pitying solitude today.

"We noticed you looking so down in the dumps at the bar," said one of the interchangeable brothers, ditching the melodic rhyming, likely sensing that it was ticking Nora off.

"And, of course, before we noticed that, we noticed you!" said the other, gesturing at her with two widely outstretched hooves. How ponies did that without toppling over, Nora would never stop questioning. At least they didn't seem to be capable of sticking to walls, like Pinkie.

"Me?" she said, before realizing something. "You two... aren't from around here, are you?"

The stallion currently on her right cocked an eyebrow, bearing a smug, toothy grin. "Nay, deary filly, and I dare say, neither are you."

She held up her hands in mock defeat. "You got me there."

So they were just curious about her? Hardly unprecedented. New ponies always had questions, like where is your fur, why do you walk around on two legs, and what are those noodly things coming our of your weird, flat hooves? Sure, Equestria was diverse - moreso these days, apparently - but most creatures still walked on all fours, and if they didn't have tails or hooves, they probably had claws or fangs. Nora had wondered a few times just what her closest relation in Equestria would be. A dragon? They walked on two legs, but that was where the similarities stopped. A minotaur? A little closer, but they still had fur, horns, and the lower half of a farm animal. Not to mention abs for days. Nora had been primed by Twilight on the various fauna and flora of Equestria, and of course that included a rundown of every intelligent species on the block. It would have also included a full tuition on their histories, cultures, mythologies and politics if she hadn't been so adament that that wasn't necessary.

The memory of Twilight made her smile, which felt weird, and when she remembered that it felt weird because she was currently angry at her, that made her sad. Emotions are fickle things, indeed. The sudden proverbial rollercoaster left her glum and back of the defensive, remembering that she currently had a social obligation to fulfil: talking. Yes, the curious travellers.

As if on cue, taking her silence as an open invitation for introductions, the mustache-sporting pony stretched out his hoof expectently.

"Flim," he said, eyes opening wide and sporting the look of a used car salesman.

"Flam," said his sibling counterpart, mirroring his motions and tilting his head a little. The duo looked as though their legs might pop out of their joints for the enthusiasm they showed in offering their hooves.

Nora blew her fringe out of her eyes a little and crossed her arms, taking one hoof in each hand, before shaking them in a zigzag formation. She didn't know why she did it; maybe their silliness was getting to her.

"Nora," she said. "I'm a human," she hastily added, pre-empting what would probably be their next question. "So let me guess, you're wondering what a human is? Never seen anything that looks quite like me before?"

She didn't ask rudely, but was conscious nonetheless that perhaps some exhasperation seeped into her tone. She had been through this song and dance so many times - almost literally, in this case.

"A human, eh, brother?" said the yellow stallion on her right - Flam, apparently. He poked at the brother's side with a... knee? Elbow? Forelegs seemed to function more like arms, sometimes, but it was hard to say what the appropriate thing to call it was.

"Why, well I never, brother!" Flim echoed, bowing his head. Flam, upon seeing this, quickly followed suite. "Charmed," Flim added, pulling Nora's hand back in and giving it a kiss without breaking eye contact. Despite feeling that the two had an angle, her heart skipped a little and her face turned flushed at the display. They were laying on the charm thick already, and were quite dashing in their own way, as long as you tried not to let the fact that their outfits and accents only let you picture them running a carnival distract you.

"We're ponies of business, ma'am," said Flam.

"That's us - the esteemed Flim and Flam!" sounded off Flim, springing up on his hind legs, forelegs reaching upward in excitement. Flam joined in as well, the brothers using each other for balance as they got more daunting and stood on only one leg each.

Nora rolled her eyes, but with their odd speech patterns more interspersed now and introductions out of the way, it didn't bother her the way it had initially. Their admittedly impressive acrobatics display didn't garner her attention as much as what they had just announced, though.

"Business? What kind of business?"

Their vocation made sense, they clearly had either a routine, or a natural flair for the dramatic; she was, relatively speaking, hooked.

"Oh, a bit of this, a bit of that," Flim said, having descended from his and Flam's impromptu circus routine, bobbing his head from side to side to emphasise 'this' and 'that' as though they were proper nouns. His face and voice both betrayed the aura of someone who knew something, and was taking great pleasure in broadcasting that they knew something, to someone who didn't know the thing. Whether the thing was juicy or not wasn't the point; the point was that they knew and you didn't. In a way they reminder her of her own two older brothers in that regard.

"Riiiiight," she said flatly.

"Presently at present," interjected Flam with some redundency, "We are on a quest of some dire importance," he said, hooking his hoof around Flim's neck and looking at her. "Booze!"

This, she wasn't expecting.

"Booze?"

"To cure our blues," Flim chimed in sadly, shutting his eyes and nodding solemnly.

"Cider. Hard cider, to be specific. An old caché."

"From back when we were nonpareil!"

Nora looked the two over, curiosity at their statement overpowering her curiosity at their insistence on this strange near-musical charade.

"Cider?" she asked. "But I thought the Apples were the only ones who made cider in this town."

The brothers hung their heads, looking glum.

"Right you are, miss, and that was just our problem."

In a moment, they both seemed to cheer up at once. It was freaky how synchronized they were at times. These guys had to be twins, right?

"But bygones have been bygones, and after we said by and were gone, we picked ourselves back up by our horseshoes, and here we are! Now we're giving Ponyville a second chance..." the stallion - she had lost track of which - said, though she thought she had heard him mutter something like "or third chance, maybe fourth," under his breath as well.

"We're here, looking for business ventures a-plenty, but pleasure before business, as my brother and I always say! That's where the sweet stuff comes in. Cider squeezed with our very own state-of-the-art machine, good as any Apple cider, any day! Made before they drove us away-"

"Sent us orders in droves, dear brother," the stallion - Flim, she remembered now - cut in, poking his brother in his side, knee/elbow serving as a lethal weapon.

"R-Right you are, brother..." Flam said behind a false smile, sheepishly.

"We had some stockpiled, used for testing before demonstrating our machine to the good townsfolk. We had forgotten all about it, as bad luck would have it, but seeing this quaint little country paradise again really got the old cogs turning," Flim said, making little circles with his hoof against his head having leaned in closer to Nora.

"And turning!" confirmed Flam, poking his head out from behind his brother to give his two bits on the situation. These two really were supportive of one another... Nora wasn't quite sure if that was for the best.

"And since cider doesn't spoil, it'll be as sweet as the day it was squeezed," said Flim.

"Sweeter," said Flam.

"Almost as sweet as you, my... sweet," concluded Flim lamely. Nora rolled her eyes yet again, shaking her head but smiling all the same at the feeble delivery.

"Why, with your tall stature, dexterous looking digits, and fancy hoofwork-"

"Footwork," she corrected, to little avail.

"Why, you could have our cider open in a pop, sure as you like. And to the victors, go the spoils...?"

So they wanted her to crack a few kegs, and she'd get a share of the drink for her troubles? Not a bad deal. The generosity of ponykind never ceased to amaze her. She had thought the brothers were a little suspect, but their logic checked out - with one exception.

"Why do you need me to retrieve it? Where the h-" she paused, making a conscious effort to avoid anything approaching bad language, even though she felt confident hell wasn't a concept here. It was just something she did in polite company. "Where on Ear-" no, that expression was out too. "Just where did you stash it?" she finished frantically, facepalming.

"Somewhere safe!"

"Somewhere nopony would think to look."

"Including us, it turns out."

This wasn't how Nora had anticipated spending her day. As it so happens, the 'where' in this story was a cave outside the town's bounds.

"Who stores cider in a cave, anyway?" she said, frustrated, rolling another barrel up the hill where her temporary employers of sorts waited patiently.

"Why, we wanted it safe and sound, ma'am," said Flim, nodding. "I must confess, our later products were... not so fresh. But this stuff is the real deal! And since we made it ourselves, it's free - what a steal!"

He jumped up, clapping his hooves together. "No profit in it, mind, but for how our luck's been going lately, a free lunch is a free lunch. Even if it's a lunch you made yourself. And the lunch in this case is a drink, but, well - you get the point."

"Well said, brother," Flam added.

Was it well said?

"Our next capital venture can wait. Thank you again, miss, for your help. I knew you were a good find."

Nora wiped her head, sweat gushing off her upper half. Her lower half was soaked for a different reason - and no, not the usual one. The cave was partially flooded now, and she'd had to wade through water up past her stomach to grab each of the five barrels that waited at the rear of the rocky cavern in a dry alcove. The cider itself was fine, as she had room to hold the barrels above the water on her return journey, so it got through unscathed. She hadn't been so lucky. On her first journey in, she'd tripped in the pool and soaked herself. She considered herself lucky to have gotten away without any nasty cuts or scrapes, let alone a sprain or break - those jagged rocks could have done a number on her. All in all, she got a little more than she bargained for. Tavern ale may not have been talked up as much as this elusive cider, the virtues of which were extolled voraciously by the salesponies on the walk over, but it was certainly a lot more accessible, at least to anypony with a few bits in their possession.

The Flim Flam brothers needed her for her height; ponies would have been drinking cave soup for a good minute before they could reach the nook at the back where the barrels laid. She did question why they couldn't magic up a solution, but they said they didn't have any spells that would help them out of this one. That tracked - apparently Twilight was the main magical prodigy around, but she was an alicorn. Starlight and Sunburst were very skilled unicorns, but most magically-inclined ponies didn't test their talents much beyond basic levitation, which would have been fine for the cider, but not for Flim and Flam themselves, who would be carrying it out completely underwater.

Nora breathed controlled but heavy breaths, standing the barrel upright. The fact that the land dipped around the entrance to the cave hadn't helped. The flashy Flim and Flam had helped her with the first three, their magic finally coming to some use, but stopped thereafter to inspect the goods, leaving her to do yet more of the legwork.

Despite being peeved at the work being a lot harder than she was originally led to believe, she at least savored the irony in the fact that these stallions wanted her for her body in a way that shattered convention.

She had rolled up her pants and shirt for the task, but while her top had mostly dried from her tumble, her legwear was still obviously saturated, and her torso shone as the sun reflected its light off her glistening body. She stood atop the hill like a human lighthouse, skin reflecting beams to steer wayward ponies to safety. This had better have been worth the trouble.

"So where the hell's this cider?" she asked, throwing her normal no-human-cursing policy to the wind for once as her thirst overcame her. She had really worked up a hankering for the stuff after so much exercise, rays bearing down on the trio mercilessly from above, the mid-afternoon sun assaulting her skin.

For her troubles, a frothing flagon was thrust into her hands right away. "Already on it, young missy," said Flam with a wink.

Nora downed half the contents in one go, liquid dribbling down her chin and speckling her bare stomach and thighs with honey-hued nectar.

"Gah," she affirmed the quality of the beverage. "Gooood."

She wore a goofy grin. The brothers looked at one another, pleased, having poured mugs of their own.

"Here's to Flim-Flam ingenuity, and human muscle!"

"Cheers," she toasted, three containers clashing mid-air in a welcome celebration.

At least this had been a distraction. This morning's heated discussion weighed on her much less now. And she had to admit, the damn cider tasted pretty good. She would have to make a point of asking AJ why these guys hadn't stuck around, if they could walk the walk. Perhaps ponies were just loyal to the Apples and their business, what with their importance to the town.

As she quaffed the remainder of her drink, the three relaxed, making a home of the fold-out chairs Flim and Flam had brought with them for such an occasion. One thing prodded at her, though. Her makeshift shorts kept sticking to her skin and it was starting to make her uncomfortable, especially now that they were drying with her still in them, fabric contracting against her thighs painfully. The water had been chilly, insulated from the hotness of the day by the walls of the dreary cave, so the sudden temperature change around that area certainly didn't help, either.

After mulling it over for a few minutes while Flim and Flam drank in silence, she reached a verdict on her situation, and with forced resolve, fighting off her inward doubts, shed her pants, pulling them slowly off her legs as they fought to remain stuck to her.

This quickly caught the attention of the two colts, who watched her intently, eyebrows raised, though saying nothing. Flam gulped down his mouthful of cider all at once. She remembered back to what Lyra had told her the night before; no one would care, right? If anything, half the ponies she met wanted to see her naked, and not even in a lewd way. It just wasn't a taboo here.

Nonetheless, the stallions' obvious curiosity at her exposed body lingered for a while, watching as her rolled-up pant legs turned inside out, the cold, moist article of clothing clinging to her skin, stinging as they pulled away. Eventually they reached her feet, where they caught around her ankles. She fought to be rid of them, but they had other ideas. Eventually, a final, extravagent kick sent them packing, and soon after her observers leaned back once more, returning to their drinks but still stealing the occasional sidelong glance.

Relishing in the relative peace that her near-nudity had brought, another thought occurred to her, but she was less sure about this one. Perhaps this was pushing it.

Her panties had also gotten drenched in her little escapade. They were practically see-through anyway, thanks to the water, and Flim and Flam weren't really at an angle to leer quite that closely from where they sat. Nora squirmed in her chair, which she was a little too big for, thinking. She looked at the stallions as they watched the horizon, questioning internally if they would say anything.

Nora was comfortable enough walking around naked in her own home, but the thought of casually chilling bottomless in the great outdoors - not to mention with two members of the male species sat right across from her with only a stack of barrels and a tree stump between them - still rubbed against her human social conditioning in a bad way. Then again, her wet undies weren't bringing her much joy right now.

With some deliberation, she slid her panties off - they were a soft pink in color, though the tone was washed out now. Not wanting to leave them on the grass, she placed them on the lid of one of the barrels that had already been drained, accidentally meeting the eye of Flim as she did so. Darting her gaze to Flam, she saw him watching her movements as well, though again, both said nothing, merely glancing at her with unreadable expressions.

The hilltop breeze tickled her naked pussy, leaving her feeling tingly, not in an unpleasant way. With her shirt in a knot, hugging her cleavage, she was probably the least clothed she had ever been outdoors. How scandelous. And to be in such a state in the company of two strapping stallions, too.

Wait, strapping? Heh, clearly the cider was getting to her already. At least, that was a convinient excuse. Let's face it, she didn't exactly need encouraging at the best of times.

Laying back, hands behind her head, she soaked in the sun on her almost bare body, feet propped up against another barrel, wind tickling her. After an unknowable amount of time, she heard a voice.

"Want to play some card games, miss?"

Turns out pony card games were the same as the ones back home - snap, go fish, that sort of thing. It had passed the time, and as many more full flasks were emptied, a mood of merriment took the trio. They were quite a few drinks in, now, and the sky was turning orange as the sun began retreating behind the trees dotting the rolling hills, the early evening glow making making everything seem warm. Nora was totally fine - her head didn't spin at all, and her words came out mostly unslurred. She would have swore by that fact. Too bad humans were good liars.

There was no strip poker in Equestria, which made sense, since ponies didn't overdress, but Nora looked like she'd lost a few rounds anyway. She had quickly gotten comfortable basking with her bottom half nude, and no wandering ponies came by to get an eyeful, so her brief foray into almost-naturism was a secret only Flim and Flam would get to enjoy. And enjoy they did. As the cider stock got lower and lower, each of them seemed to be letting their eyes linger on her just a little longer than social convention would normally dictate. At least, she was pretty sure - she was getting kind of sort of a teensie bit tipsy, maybe, so she couldn't be certain.

The three had talked, played games, and shared in many a laugh, which again, got all the more frequent the more cider they got in their bellies. They were all chuckling now, laughing at Flim, who had gotten his muzzle stuck in his mug.

"Here, you lug," Nora said, reaching in to help him out. Her fingertips brushed against his face as she slid the beaker off, and he wallowed in embarrassment for a second - seemingly moreso at her delicate contact than at his mishap.

Sensing an opportunity in the midst of spontaneity, she used the ensuing silence to ask a question.

"So," she began, getting up from her seat, her thigh-gap visible over the top of the tree stump that was their makeshift games table. "Whaaaaat I really wanna know," she soldiered on, getting slightly lost one word for a second, mouth not co-operating with brain, "Is... this. What are you two really up to in Ponyville?"

At this, she crossed her arms, laughing an ungracious, drunken laugh. She soon leaned back, still standing, letting her arms hang loosely by her sides as her core pivoted forward, her pussy doubtlessly on full display to her small but captive audience.

They exchanged a nervous glance, unsure where to look at first, until she sat back down with a thud, goods concealed once again.

"W... W..." tried Flim, apparently having some difficulty with words of his own. "What d'you - hic! - mean, miss?"

"We already told you," Flam added, merrily, "We're good ponies. No malicicus... malivisus... no bad intent heeere!"

"Bullshit!" she blurted out, startling them. She wasn't sure if it was her volume or the word itself that seemed to get something of a reaction out of them; it certainly had the makings of being a pony-appropriate swear, referencing a bovine quadruped, and all. She clapped to herself and laughed at their reactions, seeming to forget what she had wanted for a moment, until her focus - or what was left of it - returned.

"You two have the makings of entrapren- of entrep- of business geniuses," she said, "And this cider is très magnifique," she punctuated with a kiss to her hand. "Not quite as good as Applejack's cider, though," she hastily clarified, "Hers is awesome. Old Apple family secret recipe, they say. I've heard that one plenty of times, let me tell you," she laughed to herself, memories of her time on the farm flooding back. "Apple fritters? Old family recipe. Apple vinegar? Old family recipe. Apple pies? You better believe it," she slapped her knee in jovial recollection...

"Old family recipe," said the trio all at once, the other two catching on.

"A whole book of recipies. Awesome stuff. Super good. Super old, too! All those Apples know it off by heart, anyhow, so they just keep it in their cellar," she stifled more laughter. "Great big tome, size of a... a..." she struggled for an analogy, but stretched her hands out wide to illustrate her point, much to her own amusement.

It could have been her imagination, but it seemed as though the lighthearted atmosphere fell flat for a short while after that. The happy Flim and Flam had looked suddenly serious when she mentioned that book, but then again, she could barely see them out of her squinting eyes, or when she stopped for more bouts of giggles, doubled over.

When Nora got over how funny she was - mostly, anyway - she reclined more, chest rising and falling quickly as she calmed down, looking suddenly altogether more tired.

"Well this was been a most pleasant evening, my dear," said Flim, spitting cider a little.

"And your stories, for hours, we could possibly hear," said Flam with a curt nod.

"Naaah," said Nora with a groan. "It's been great, but I oughta be getting back."

She stood up, but her movement was stifled. She couldn't extend her back properly, forced into a squat. Shimmying on her feet, she looked left and right, searching for an answer to her quandry, when she heard her company break into uncontained, disharmonious laughter.

She looked at them, seeing them pointing hooves right at her. Throwing a glance back at her own rear, she realized too late that her pony-sized chair had gotten stuck to her, ahem... human-sized posterior. The little camping stool hung off her ass like a tail, cheeks wedged between the arms as it gnawed on her rump. She flushed red instantly, bringing both hands to the chair at once to prize it off her. A good ten seconds or so of heaving, and she was rewarded for her efforts, and punished for her inelegance, tumbling over backwards and landing in a heap on the ground face first.

She heard the jeering behind her stop at once as she fell, going limp in the way that drunks do, making a feeble attempt to save herself by putting out her hands, but reacting far too slowly for it to matter. She soon found herself on the bare grass, face down and ass giving a salute, her back half propped up by her knees while her face rested on her arms. The experience hadn't hurt her - or at least, she wasn't feeling it yet - but she did become aware, after taking stock of her new position, blinking a few times in uncertainty, that she was mooning the boys behind her. This was her second time today inadvertently flashing them, and while she had fought off the nudity taboo enough to go bottomless in their company, she wasn't quite sure how she - or they - felt about her full-on presenting like this.

Soon a butter-colored hoof reached out in front of her face, a tender voice calling out to her. "Please, my sweet, stay a spell."

She dragged her torso upward, hands flat on the ground, before taking the offered leg and pulling herself up to Flam, who had come to her assistence.

"But you're drunk as a skunk, and double the smell!"

She once again chuckled heartily, relishing in the joy that cheekily adopting the duo's rhyming scheme for a moment brought her. She wasn't wrong about the smell, either. The both stank of cider - no worse than she did, but still. And she almost thought she could sense something else in the air... something familiar... it almost smelled like-

Before she could finish the thought, she became acutely aware of another falling sensation. Once again she fell forwards, the time into poor Flam. Having been somewhat overenthusiastic in her asencion from the ground just prior, she had pulled herself up a little hard and a little fast and flown right into his body, crashing into him and sending the pair spiralling down once more. Nora ended up straddling Flam, who crashed into the base of the tree stump, leaning against it with his back, his straw hat askew. His pupils danced as he saw stars, shaking his head to chase away the dizziness.

That was when she realized what she had been smelling - the aroma had filled her lungs on many a pleasant night, after all. It was the delicious scent of stallion musk, the smell of unbridled male horniness that she savored, nostrils now flaring as she breathed it in on the disoriented Flam.

"Brother! Nora!" she heard an alarmed Flim call out from somewhere off to her side.

As Flam came to from his daze, and Nora came down from her brief high on his stench, she felt something poking her backside. Oh yes, he couldn't hide it now. She grinned deviously, barring teeth like fangs as she held him, feeling very much in control.

"Well, well, well, what is this?" she asked rhetorically, sliding her ass down his body so that his cock was on full display. Flam looked at it wide-eyed before darting his attention up at the smirking Nora.

"Uh, I - Sorry, ma'am! I-"

She cut him off by pressing a finger to his lips, which quivered against her momentairly. "Uh, uh uh~" she taunted. "Bad boy. You don't get to talk when you're - hic! - showing yourself so dirtily like this..."

Never mind what she had done mere seconds ago. Who ever said whores weren't hypocrites?

Flam merely looked at her, paralyzed under her weight and her stare.

"Madame," came Flim's voice, the pony having walked up to see what was going on. "What is the meaning of this?"

"Oh, hush," she scolded with a wag of her other hand's index finger. "There'll be plenty for you. But first..."

Nora took the finger she had wagged at Flim like a metronome and started tracing it along Flam's stallionhood, running it up and down his length, carressing him only with the very tip of her digit. It was a delicate sensation - one that he could probably barely feel - but it certainly did its job. Flam scrunched his eyes shut and he winced at the touch, clearly trying in vain to hold back his desire. Withdrawing her other finger that had pressed his lips shut, he soon started whimpering, his cute noises barely audible.

Nora took her newly freed hand and allowed it to join in the fun, rubbing all ten fingertips along the sides of Flam's impressive member. It was stark black, in contrast to his light coat. Many stallions had dark dicks, which made them stand out nicely against their fur; it was like nature was just trying to beckon her in with the pretty colors. She wondered if Rarity would say they were complimentary.

Flam shuddered under her gentle hands, his cock throbbing despite his intent to resist. "Uh... N... Nora," he stammered out, throwing a hoof over his face.

Nora paused briefly to undo her top, dishevelled though it was, tossing it aside with ease. Her bra followed, and with that, she removed the last of her scant amount clothing. Her puppies hanging free, she felt the cool air on her tits, relishing in the feeling as they swayed with her own movements.

No longer content in teasing Flam with only her hands, she respositioned herself, bouncing upward on her heels once before slamming her ass down over his erect cock, which still laid flat against his body. Drunk and determined, Nora began grinding on him, her lower lips parting slightly, hugging his girth in a half-embrace. She slid down his length until she felt his balls against her ass, then bounced up again and thrust forward, restarting the motion and working him again from the tip.

Flam melted under her tender touch, and Flim, for his part, stopped his objections, his mouth turning flat and unreadable, but his own cock doing his talking for him, poking out of his sheath in a signal of his own obvious arousal.

"Lookie here," Nora began, relishing in the liberation the sexual power she suddenly had over them brought. "The only thing harder than the cider is you boys," she concluded with a snort, her laugh still somewhat unhinged from the drink. Speaking of which, she seized the opportunity when bouncing up from Flam's balls yet again to snatch her flagon from atop the tree stump she had pinned Flam to.

"Waste not, want not," she said, taking another big sip nonchalantly as she turned the pony beneath her into a quivering mess. The faintest beginnings of a handjob and a little grinding - no penetration whatsoever - and Flam already looked like it was taking all his willpower to hold back from bursting right there. This was Nora's wheelhouse, her special talent. She sometimes envied ponies their gift of destiny, of knowing their life's calling, and even having a convinient reminder of it tattooed right there on their ass. Well, if she had a cutie mark, it would probably be of a big, fat stallion cock getting slurped up by a wanting tongue, or being jerked by dainty little hands. Perhaps, she considered, it was for the best that she wasn't a pony.

"C'mere, cutie," she said, beckoning Flim over with her left hand, the one not currently supporting her drink. Like a pony possessed, he complied, saying nothing. "You know how to use that thing?" she asked, pointing at his now fully erect cock with glee.

"Well, I-"

"Rhetorical question, sweetie," she said, grasping it around its head at once and running her fingers along the surface. Flim's stiff and neutral expression deteriorated immediately, his teeth gritted and his eyes darting skyward at the pleasure received.

She never slowed down her gyrations on Flam's solid appendage, either, her pussy kissing his shaft all the way down to its base, the pair of them growing wetter from a mixture of her own excitement and his precum. This made her sliding easier, which in turn fuelled more arousal and more juices. It was a lascivious circle - one that neither wanted to break.

She increased her attention on Flim also, not wanting to leave the poor colt out in the cold after his late start to the fun. Abandoning her erstwhile method of circling his tip with her fingers, she upgraded to fully jerking him off, yanking his penis with vigor and courage both. His head flared up, her motions clearly doing a good enough job at simulating sex for his primal equine instincts to kick in. Nora loved the sight of a flared horsecock. Almost as much as the feel of one.

After taking another sip of her cider, she prompted to move events forward again. "Enough of this."

She stopped stock still, sitting on the tip of Flam's dick, pinning it to his barrel, before rising slightly, balancing on her heels. She put her cider down again, not wanting to stop masturbating Flim to her left, before grabbing hold of Flam's cock, now slick and shiny from their activities, positioning it upward as she hovered over it.

Taking in a deep breath, she steadied herself, before slowly lowering down onto it, gasping slightly as he entered her.

Nora would never be as unprepared as her first time experiencing this feeling, and having Big Mac be the one to shatter her equine virginity had certainly helped subsequent encounters feel a little less daunting, but even still, every time a stallion fucked her, she couldn't help but shudder at their length and girth, the moment of penetration always catching her body slightly off guard no matter how mentally prepared she was.

As Flam broke new ground, Flim too panted heavier, moving in closer. Nora's hand movements had slowed down considerably as she sat down on Flam's lap, adjusting to the feeling of having him inside of her. She lowered herself slowly but surely, until she reached his base, now comfortable with her feet flat once again, the fur on his front tickling her slightly as it brushed against her ass. By way of apology to Flim, she leaned in, barely a moment of hesitation delaying her, before peppering the head of his cock with kisses.

Nora could feel Flam twitching inside her, and she knew he was close. Not wanting to let the opportunity go to waste, she began bouncing, this time with the whole length of a stallion inside her, continuing to take the lead in their romp as she used him like a living dildo.

Meanwhile, with Flim, she quickly moved from gentle kisses to wrapping her lips around his tip, sucking him and sloshing her tongue around. He, too, felt taut, his member seeming to contract with some urgency at her advances.

She wanted to moan, to tease, to cry out for them to fuck her like the slut she was, but her mouth was busy, too busy to quit. That was until the thirst hit her in a different way, and she paused her oral affair, cock popping out of her mouth with a schlop, before she went at the cider once again, gargling a little, keeping it in her mouth, then going right back to work. Her tastebuds appreciated the blend of apple and precum, and the scent wasn't too bad either, assaulting her senses readily.

As she rode Flam's rod, pounding him into the ground as though trying to dig through it, she felt he was about to arrive. Bracing herself, she slid right up his shaft until only his tip remained inside, before descending with a triumphant bang, slamming onto his lap as he shot his load inside of her.

Fun fact: stallions cum a lot. She had taken plenty of loads in her days as a prostitute, but it was always an ordeal - much like the size factor, being subjected to a stallion shooting inside you was something you could expect, but never quite grow accustomed to. At least, Nora hoped she wouldn't. The feeling of him erupting inside you, filling you up and up and up until you thought you would burst, but then somehow still going; the feeling of hot seed shooting into you in a way humans were never meant to experience, but that she had been lucky enough to go through time after time; the warmth, the heaviness, the way you could feel every throb, every iota of movement inside you... it was heaven. Truly, it was why she practised her craft.

This time was no different. As Flam came, she squealed in delight, throwing her head back and shutting her eyes at the blissful sensation of being filled. It was a good thing she couldn't get pregnant from a pony, because they sure did stack the odds. If humans came this much, she was pretty sure condoms wouldn't withstand the force. There would probably be about 20 billion of us right now. Mares must have been made of strong stuff - how did they not get knocked up every time they did the dirty? She couldn't quite differentiate between pony cock and a fire hose half the time - the fact that most every mare in town was not sporting a baby bump was either a small miracle, or the curse of some vengeful fertility god.

Flam's head lolled back, and to the outside world, he was dead, killed in action doing what he loved. Not a stir from the fast-talking salespony. Flim, on the other hand, begged a release of his own, his cock throbbing and stirring, Nora knew that he, too, was right on the brink.

Instead of resuming her fellatio, she stroked him to completion, taking her almost empty flaggon and dipping his flared tip just over the rim. As he shot out, a thick rope spattered the inside of her drink. She licked her lips, pulling the beverage away and letting Flim finish on the ground as she slowed her motions to a halt. Well, most of it went on the ground - splash damage ensured some had gotten on her leg, and even on Flam's side. Oops.

"Good boy," she said. "Now, for my treat."

She necked the cum-infused cider, its thick consistency giving her some trouble, but by pacing herself, Nora was able to swallow every last drop. She finished with an "Ahh," sticking her tongue out to show Flim that not an ounce of his cum reamined.

She was impressed at her own creativity - and generosity. Back home, this sort of thing probably would have been confined to some specialist fetish porn shoot, but she just threw it in for free. That was the fun part about having very few inhibitions; you got to try a lot of things. The ever-so-slightly bitter aftertaste of Flim's cum lingered in her throat as she scrambled off the prone Flam.

She collapsed next to him, panting at the workout she had just brought on herself. Skirting on the edge of inebriation had most certainly made her a little more, well, forward than usual. Often enough stallions would approach her - now that she had a fledging sexual empire, she didn't often need to do the chasing. When she wanted to - often when a particularly hunky stallion took her fancy - she would flirt a little, gauge their interest, then lay on the charm before eventually suggesting that they buck her brains out. Here, however, she had just sort of thrown herself at Flam, and Flim had followed like a fallen domino. It worked, sure - much to her own delight - but it was not her normal tact. She wondered if the alcohol had gotten to her a tad worse than she initialled assessed.

"Miss," said Flim between pants, "That was one heck of a good time."

Nora smiled softly at this, closing her eyes as she laid naked on the grass, feeling the cool air on her body. Her peace was ruined in short order, however, by a sudden movement to her right, accompanied by a raised voice.

"Just what the heck did'ja do to me, brother? D'you know how wrong it is to have your own flesh and blood's cum staining your coat? Yeugh!"

Nora opened one eye to see an irate Flam gesturing at his side, which was sticky with Flim juice. Her smile grew, unable to hide her amusement at the situation, not that either pony noticed.

"Well you were the one hogging her all to yourself, brother," Flim retorted, holding his hooves out in a conciliatory gesture but not capitulating completely. "I don't think you'd have much rather been in my position, while you were rutting her senseless like that."

A generous estimation of the situation: she had rutted him, he just came along for the ride.

Flam scowled a little, leering at his brother as sibling rivalries boiled to the surface. Nora had only seen them getting on, so this argument was a change of pace, but she supposed that all brothers liked to get one over on the other sometimes.

"Well, why don't we switch ends and see for ourselves, then?"

The duo butted heads, snorting in an expression of pony anger. Nora would have found the attempt at aggression kind of cute, were it not for what she just heard.

"You're on, brother!" Flim exclaimed, eyes narrowing at they stared each other down.

Nora was in no way inclined to let them down; a double pleasure ride would really hit the spot for her right now. But all the same...

"Fellas. Excuse - hic! - excuse me, fellas!" she called out, waving a hand to catch their attention.

As the pair ceased locking metaphorical horns for a second, they turned to face the human, expressions softening.

"Don't you think I need a say in whether or not either of you is going to rut me again?"

She crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow in an attempt to look serious. She felt that her nudity undermined that attempt, at least partially, but if that was truly a human hang-up, maybe her intent would drive through all the same. It certainly had some effect, as the two colts broke eye contact. Flim coughed politely into his hoof, while Flam kicked at the ground absentmindedly.

She sensed they were on the verge of an apology, along with an offer to screw her brains out, but she didn't let them get a word out, eager to kick off the action herself. "You have my permission," she declared, matter of factly.

The yellow unicorns grinned ear-to-ear, perking up right away at her announcement. They likely couldn't believe their luck. She had certainly given them a lot this day - cider, conversation, her body... twice. She was gunning for Rarity's element, for sure. Look out, girl.

Nora stood up, walking up to an untapped barrel of cider and rolling it down to where the duo awaited. They both wore questioning expressions, but she simply leaned over, bending her body across the thing with her pussy on display. She tapped the side of the wooden container with one hand, decreeing that she was open for business. "So who's where? Flim's getting my human hiney this time, I take it?"

Flim shot an ecstatic smile, walking up to Nora's rear as she tapped on her ass to punctuate the point. Flam sulked, looking more than a little jealous, despite having just coated her insides minutes ago himself. Instead, he circled around to her front, where her head rested, supported by chest which the barrel propped up. She had to steady herself with her feet to ensure she didn't roll too much - the object certainly wasn't designed for such purposes. But she felt like letting the stallions loose this time, ceding her control to them - that meant no more piledriving on the ground. And if they were going to mount her properly, that either left her with the option of fully rolling around in the dirt like some wild beast - not wholly unappealing, but not right now - or propping herself against something like the tree stump or one of the barrels lying around so she could stick her ass in the air and let them go to town. The stump offered more study support, but the thought of getting splinters in her tits put the kibosh on that one.

As the pair got into position, she braced herself, gripping the sides of the barrel with her hands. First Flam moved in, his penis already half hard at the sight of her and the thought of what was to come. He stepped forward, more or less level with her mouth from this position, egging her on.

"Why don't you clean up some of the mess you made, eh, doll?" he said, cum-stained rod meeting her lips.

She scowled, annoyed at the sudden bravado of the two, and at this line especially, given she had gone out of her way to show the pair a good time and considered that they had nothing to be cocky about, but she complied nonetheless, taking his tip in her mouth. She swirled her tongue around it, coaxing it back into action, leaving Flam as content with her mouth as he had been with her vagina. She could taste the remnants of their previous encounter.

Before long, she was reminded that this was a two for one deal, feeling her ass cheeks being spread by a hoof from behind. She couldn't see Flim as he brought his penis to her entrance, put she could feel him, his prodding cock making contact with her labia.

Not wasting time, the stallion broke through, parting her lips with ease as he took up room inside Nora. He was slow and gentle, but it was apparent to her that this was against his own urges; nonetheless, she was grateful that he didn't try and slip in with one thrust. Even after being loosened up by Flam, that would have been a painful experience.

Speaking of Flam, he pushed further forward, now rock solid and ready for more loving. Nora took in as much as she could, adjusting to the unexpected intrusion into her mouth, trying to brace herself as his size overwhelmed her. No woman alive could have deep-throated that thing, so if that's what he was expecting, he had another thing coming. When she felt her throat closing up, she blocked the entrance to her windpipe with a tongue lingering at the back of her mouth, halting any further advances. Meanwhile, she squirmed under the movements of Flim, who was now exploring her with great interest, making little thrusts and testing how well she could take his length. Having already gotten up close and personal with his stallionhood once, she estimated that he was about on par with Flam in terms of size. She did wonder, however, if there would be any discrepancy between the two in terms of ability: the threesomes hardly made for a fair one-to-one comparison, with her capturing the initiative the first time, but still, Nora pondered whether Flim would make for an even better fuck.

Between Nora's attentive tonuge and soft mouth, and her tight, hugging inner walls, she pleased the pair of stallions splendidly - they certainly seemed in high spirits, piping her with purpose, each sliding in and out of her rhythmically. As soon as Flim hilted her, she would rock forward, rolling the barrel, and which point Flam would bury as much of his delightful dick into her mouth as he could manage. This sent shockwaves in the other direction, rolling the barrel back to Flim, and serving to function as the world's most perverted Newton's cradle. The fact that she had chosen a cylindrical object to prop herself on had been a coincidence - nay, a necessity - yet as she felt the varnished wood rolling under the stomach, sending her back and forth between the two males, she was ultimately grateful for the lack of alternatives. They were pushing her into one another like a pinball fired back and forth between two bumpers in perpetual motion. She wondered if she had stumbled on the beginnings of a new era of Equestrian transportation. The thought of the assorted DILFs of Ponyville riding her to work each day certainly didn't raise any complaints.

Her pussy clenched tight around Flim as he penetrated her over and over, ramming her with the lusty intentions of a wild animal. Flam, meanwhile, poked and prodded at her tongue, assaulting her mouth with his girth, her head swirling with dizziness at the musk that wafted under his crotch. Nora had never felt more at home than between the two, the spitroast really giving her the ride of her life.

Nora's tits flopped against the barrel as she rolled back and forth. Their thrusts were getting more volatile, now, and while she had less distance to cross as the two closed in on her from both ends, she was sent packing with some oomph; as if proving the point, Flim hilted her, his humping vibrating her ass as his body slammed her booty in a way which would have registered on the Richter scale. This sent poor Nora bounding forward, lurching over the barrel with much more of a lean than intended, her feet rising off the ground behind her, marking the end of her stability. Flam had to retreat slightly at this, adjusting to her new downward angle, her position fighting off his dick's urge to rise skyward. Nora tried to dig her heels into Flim's sides for support, but kept slipping off, her legs kicking and flailing aimlessly.

Eventually, she was bucked so far in one direction that she could not stop herself from falling over the barrel, forcing Flam down into a sitting position to accommodate her. As she hung in the air, suspended only by the slippery, rotund wood and the two dicks impaling her, she felt a heat rising in her lower regions. Her own time was upon her, now.

From this angle, at least, she was able to hook her feet around Flim's neck, helping him to lunge at her with her own hip movements, forcing him into her as deep as he could go. This sent her sliding more and more into Flam, her mouth straining under the size of his member, but gravity doing the heavy lifting for her. Flim was effectively screwing her into his brother, pushing her deeper and deeper into Flam's crotch as he sat in front of the cider barrel, mouth agape and awash with carnal delight.

Nora sensed something - a familiar feeling. Her throat went tighter still as Flam clenched his hoof.

Oh fuck, not now!

It was too late: Flam burst, his thick pony semen coating Nora's mouth and shooting down her throat, past her tongue which shielded her as best it could. She coughed and sputtered, tapping the pony on the knee to let him know to pull back. He did so at once, still firing away at her, and as he pulled out, several more bursts coated her face and chest. Still recovering, Nora spat out as much of the cum as she could. Don't judge her: you try tanking a load of pony sperm like it's no big deal.

As Flam came down from his peak, unleahsing his orgasm, he slammed a hoof on the barrel between Nora's head and a resting arm. It didn't look at all intentional, but this blow was too severe for the vessel, the wood breaking under the might of the strike and cider shooting out of a newly made hole right under Nora's face, soaking her in yet more fluids. She closed her eyes at once, spurting out even more liquid from her mouth, before moving in with her face and closing her lips around the hole, plugging the leak by drinking in the small stream that had been overflowing.

Flam looked at her, almost in disbelief at her actions. "Darn, girl, you are one heck of a mare."

She would have blushed were she not still getting fucked silly.

Flim had reached his own limit, and not a moment too soon, Nora thought, the precariousness of her position readily apparent. She still felt her own arousal bubbling up, the repeated ramming from Flim sending her over the edge. As he pulled out almost all the way, she squirted over his dick, coating it in her love, before he finished with one final jab. While Nora suckled at the escaping cider, this definitive slam from Flim also hit the barrel, his foreleg knocking against the metal brace. The thing burst, and the pair came crashing to the floor right as he buried himself inside her, cumming intently.

"Ah, ah, ah, ah, ahhhh!~"

Nora could not contain her moans, the pleasure proving to be too much. This was certainly the most unique way she had fucked so far. Still, there's always room for improvement. As Flim finished firing off in her pussy, his cum leaking out for how deeply she was filled, even with her ass in the air and gravity fighting to keep his semen in, he sighed, giving her ass a light tap before unsheathing himself from her.

Nora collapsed, laying on her side with her arms outstrethced, hands in front of her face. The trio had gotten soaked from the cider, but being on top of the barrel when it burst, she had taken the brunt, her chest, navel and legs all sticky and coated. Her front was also still loaded with Flam's cum, though she made little effort to clean it off, besides a cursosry licking of her lips.

The brothers laid down as well, exhausted from the evening's affair. They both panted heavily, gazing at the sky which had begun to darken, the sun more or less fully hidden now. The purples and deep blues of the sky filled their vision as they sank into the long grass, not a care in the world.

"Well, brother, you were right," said Flim, breaking the silence. "Her pussy was extremely tight."

"And, dear brother, I must note my luck," replied Flam, returning serve, "Her human mouth can really suck."

"I did rather enjoy getting fucked," finished Nora, chuckling softly at having completed another of their rhymes. "So, did you two get it out of your system? Ready to kiss and make up?"

"Oh my, dear Nora," said Flam. "You really know how to bring a pair of stallions together."

"An exquisite ride, indeed," agreed Flim. "Too bad Manehatten gals don't put out like you!"

"Watch it," she said with a light smile, giving him a mock slap from her reclined position, feigning offense at the comment.

"Really, though," said Flim, "I could fuck you all day!"

"And I could fuck you all night," piped up Flam.

"Well, play your cards right," said Nora, pausing on the word to match their sing-song temperment, breaking their little stanza into disntinct lines, "And you just might."

As she laid there in bliss, one thought did occur to her.

Fuck, she mused. I forgot to even charge!

Well, easy cum, easy go. Still, these two were businessponies by trade - she may have missed a good opportunity, there. A few extra bits never hurt, and she had technically given out four freebies today. Tut tut, naughty Nora.

She would have to punish herself for that one - she would think about it long and hard the next time she was choking on some juicy stallion cock.

Already envisioning her next conquest, the air had turned chilly, and against her cider-soaked, cum-stained naked body, there was one other thing she wanted to know.

"Now, where did I put my panties?"