Your shoes slide across the marble floor of Canterlot Castle as you round the sharp corner as fast as you can. You nearly slam into the wall before you successfully change your trajectory. Just in time, too, as after you take a few steps you hear the sound of a minor explosion going off where you were just standing. You don't dare turn around, as doing so could cost you precious seconds of time. Your breathing is heavy and ragged as you sprint with all of your might. A few feet ahead of you, Princess Luna is doing the same. What did she do to get you into this mess?!
Just a few minutes ago, you were enjoying a quiet cup of tea with the princess. As Equestria's only human, she took a vested interest in you after your sudden appearance. As such, these types of meetings are commonplace, and the two of you have grown close enough over the last few months to be intimate. That said, your meeting was cut short when Luna attempted to lift a teacup to her lips using magic, only for the teacup to shatter in midair, causing tea to cover both the table and its two occupants. You're still a little wet from that, actually. More importantly, however, was the object lodged into the table after the little "surprise." You're pretty sure you've seen one of those in a movie before. What are they called again? Shurchickens? Eh, oh well. No matter what it's called, it's a bladed throwing weapon that can do some serious damage. Both of you suddenly realized the implications of the scenario, and you immediately jumped to your feet (and hooves). You could not find your mysterious assailant, but you realized that you were in danger when the hairs on the back of your neck began to stand up. Almost instinctively, you stood back-to-back with Luna, carefully observing every inch of the small room. Then, just as suddenly as the first time, you see Luna tilt her head to the side, just barely avoiding yet another shurchicken. Less than a second after she does so, she uses magic to throw the nearby doors open, dragging you along with her.
"We're running. It's bad."
"W-wait, what's-"
"No time!"
With that, the two of you began sprinting away. Every few seconds you would see a projectile go flying by from behind you, which Luna would narrowly avoid. Every so often, one of them would explode. The fact that your life is in grave danger suddenly became apparent to you as you sprinted as fast as your legs would carry you away from the unknown attacker(s). Thus, you find yourself a few feet behind the princess, running from who know what to who knows where.
"Luna! W-where are..." You struggle to speak through your pants. "Where are we going?!"
"I don't know! Anywhere but here!"
"What did you do?!"
Suddenly, another object whizzes by your head, though this time it misses Luna by a mile. To your surprise, it suddenly explodes about ten feet in front of her, causing the hall to crumble. The ceiling caves in, blocking your exit. Luna slides to a quick stop, and you struggle to do the same.
"Dang it!" It seems as though she wasn't expecting that.
You aren't very good at thinking on your feet. You know that you need to keep moving, but how? Rubble blocks the hallway, and even though Luna could probably move it with magic, she doesn't have enough time to do so before whoever or whatever is chasing you catches up. You glance to your sides. To your right, a thick marble wall. To your left, a stained glass window with a moon insignia on it. No time to think!
"Please catch me Luna!"
With those words, you throw yourself at the window, easily crashing through it. Glass cuts up your arms and a bit of your face, and you quickly find yourself falling. Canterlot is built into the side of a mountain, after all, and you have a few hundred feet before you hit the ground. Oh well. There are worse ways to die, you suppose.
Suddenly, you feel a pair of hooves wrap around your torso before your descent slows. Glancing up, you see that Luna did indeed follow you, and she caught you before you could fall too far. You're still moving very fast, but she's using her wings to make your descent more of a glide. Not quite flying, though, you're too heavy for that. More like... falling with style.
"Great thinking, moonbeam!" You're not really used to that strange pet name yet, but you digress. "I'd say we're home free! Well, not quite 'home' free since we're fleeing Canterlot, but we're okay!"
You look out at the vast landscape before you. The distant fields and rolling hills of Equestria look lovely when lit up by the moon like this, and it somewhat makes up for how terrifying it is to be this high in the air supported only by Luna's grip.
"Do you know who was chasing us?"
"I have a hunch. You see, earlier this week I- WOAH!"
She suddenly flaps her wings and veers to the side as another projectile rushes past her, exploding in the air close enough to briefly heat up your face. You take the opportunity to turn around, and you see four ponies wearing black, skin-tight suits that cover their entire bodies save for their eyes. They aren't pegasi, but their suits appear to have materials that connect their legs to their torsos, creating wingsuits that allow them to glide through the night sky. And they look angry.
"Wh-who are they?!"
"A bunch of persistent buggers, apparently. Hold on, it's about to get rough."
Luna takes a nosedive, suddenly doubling the speed at which you're falling. The force makes tears rush out of your eyes and you can barely see what's going on. You can only somewhat make out the outlines of more projectiles flying past as Luna does her best to dodge and weave in midair, until eventually you hear an explosion right above you.
"ARGH!"
Luna is hit, and the two of you begin a free fall towards the ground, which is now less than a hundred feet away. Once again, having almost no time to think, you do the first thing that comes to mind and... start yelling at Luna. What? What could you do in this scenario?
"Luna, teleport us up!"
"I-I can't bring us that far!"
"You don't have to! Just teleport us a few feet!"
You have less than two seconds until you hit the rapidly approaching ground.
"If you say so!"
There's a sudden flash of blue magic and you're both brought a couple of feet higher into the air. You're about ten feet off of the ground, so while gaining that height didn't do much in and of itself, the spell did halt all of your forward momentum. There is a brief moment where you're just floating there, clutching onto each other, before you suddenly fall the remaining ten feet. It hurts, especially as Luna lands on top of you, but you're not dead, so that's a plus.
With a groan, you push Luna off of yourself and sit up, and she does the same. You take a second to get your bearings. In your fall, you found yourselves with your backs to the mountain that Canterlot is built into. Meanwhile, in front of you, the four ponies all gracefully land in perfect formation, each staring at Luna angrily. They surround the two of you, cornering you against the steep face of the mountain.
"Soooooo, how are you going to get us out of this one, Luna?"
"I don't know, that explosion hit me pretty hard. I don't know if I have another spell in me right now."
"S-so, this is it?"
"It might be, my moonbeam."
As the four ponies draw closer, Luna leans over and grabs onto you, trembling as she does so. You don't know what exactly is going on here, but you've never seen her like this. Unsure of what else to do, you wrap your arms around her and hold her tight. She begins to lightly sob as the ponies finally reach both of you, staring daggers into your eyes as Luna buries her face into your chest. Finally, one of them speaks. His voice is deep and intimidating.
"Princess Luna, you are under arrest."
You interject for the sobbing mare.
"Why? What did she do? Who are you?!"
"We are representatives of Nintendo, also known as the Nintendo Ninjas. Princess Luna is being arrested under suspicion of using the Dolphin emulator to illegally play Nintendo GameCube games."
"T-that's what all of this is about?!" You turn to look down at Luna, who is sobbing into your shirt. "Luna..."
She suddenly pulls her head back to speak.
"I JUST WANTED TO PLAY MELEE!"
She quickly buries her face back into your chest. You gently caress her flowing mane as you look at the ninjas. The one who spoke previously steps forward in an intimidating manner.
"And you, human. You helped her to escape. What do you have to say for yourself?"
There is a quiet moment at the bottom of the moonlit mountain. You ponder the last hour or so of your life, and the events that led up to it. You look into the stallions eyes before glancing down at the sobbing mare in your arms. You close your eyes and nod to yourself before looking at the stallion once more.
"Mr. Ninja."
"Yes?"
"...You know, it's actually really easy to hack your 3DS. Anyone can do it."
The last thing you see is the sudden sheen of steel being swung towards your neck before everything goes black.
You awaken in a cold sweat. Panting heavily, you place a hand to your neck. You're okay. You look around the room. It's dark in here, though the sun is clearly visible through the tinted glass. You look at the dark blue canopy bed you find yourself in before you glance to your side. Sleeping peacefully next to you is Luna, a smile on her face as she drools a little bit onto her pillow. With a chuckle, you give her a quick kiss on the cheek and plop back down onto your own pillow. Thankfully, it was all just a dream. Ninjas aren't actually coming for Luna. Heh, that would be ridiculous, right? Luna doesn't even USE emulators, after all!
...Right?
Luna suddenly awakens in a cold sweat. Panting heavily, she places a hoof to her face, only to find that her tears were not real. She's okay. She looks around the room. It's dark in there, though the sun is clearly visible through the tinted glass. She looks at the dark blue canopy bed she finds herself in before she glances to her side. Sleeping peacefully next to her is you, a worried frown on your face as you drool a little bit onto your pillow. With a chuckle, she gives you a quick kiss on the cheek and plops back down onto her own pillow. Thankfully, it was all just a dream. Ninjas aren't actually coming for you. Heh, that would be ridiculous, right? You wouldn't hack a 3DS, after all!
...Right?
Author's Note
I really can't blame Luna. I mean, have you seen what a copy of Melee goes for nowadays?!
As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!
