Well, turns out Fit Right In was absurdly easy for me. In game terms it was basically a playable cutscene. I just stood there and sometimes did a dance move. We were also spinning umbrellas for some reason. I have no clue why that's such a common piece of choreography in musicals, but it's not really my place to judge that, I guess.

Whilst they went about singing about the importance of disguising as unicorns, we each got teleported about at random with got seriously confusing. I also missed a basketball shot, which was a bit awkward.

We continued with that for a bit, but at last came the time to fit the disguises. I only needed one thing to be attached, namely a horn, so Izzy fitted it with not too much difficulty onto my head. It basically sat like a party hat, running forward at an angle and making a nice silhouette in front of me.

I sighed, glad I wouldn't have to stick anything else on. What Pipp was stuck in looked seriously uncomfortable, wrapped around her wings. I knew they couldn't let those be visible, but it still looked awkward anyway.

Still, I was glad in what I had fitted. Misty was already a unicorn, so what she had fitted wasn't a fake horn. But when she and Izzy emerged from the bathroom, they'd done something very dramatic.

Her mane and tail were now red and purple, done in gradual tones running across her head and her tail. It looked absolutely stunning, and I must say Izzy did a superb job. Misty didn't seem to share this sentiment at first, and once the singing was over we stayed outdoors whilst the rest of the party formed up.

"I don't know why we went for this," she said quietly.

"The mane and tail job?" I said.

"Yes!" Misty said. "I look like somepony dropped a can of paint on me!"

"You don't look silly," I said, with a smile. "I think it suits you very nicely. We should all be allowed to experiment with our appearances to find who we truly are."

Misty fell quiet, and looked up. "You still love me like this?" she asked, quietly.

"Of course I do," I said. "And I always will."

"Come on ponies!" Hitch called. "Time to march! We make for Bridlewood!"

"We're already in Bridlewood!" Izzy pointed out.

Hitch shook his head. "Then we make for wherever it is we are going in Bridlewood!"

We trotted along, soaking up the pastoral scenes before us. I could only hope the unicorns could appreciate the rural paradise they seemingly had, well away from the smoke and smog of the big city and seemingly in peace. No wonder these sorts of places had such a strong hold on the mind.

Anyway, I doubt you want to here me analyze the design of every tree, so I'll skip forward to save us all time. We continued to wander along, until we were in the tearoom itself.

It was a nice place with a low ceiling and a bebop jazz band playing in the background, with a pony doing his best impression of Charlie Parker. I certainly appreciated the variety in sound, even if bebop isn't to my taste to be honest.

I took a seat next to Misty, who understandably wanted to stay with the rest of us. Ponies don't normally go wandering off on their own for what I hope are fairly obvious reasons. We crowded round a table, and I ordered some tea. A few minutes later, the tea arrived and stopped in front of me. Some milk sat next to it, presumably for me to add.

I decided to taste it without the milk. I was more of a coffee pony, and would drink it different colors depending on how I was feeling. I drank it, and my face went all sorts of strange colors as I tried to process it. I eventually swallowed it, and leaned down into the cup, panting.

"Is everything OK?" Misty asked.

I panted for a while longer. "That... was incredibly strong!" I said. "I can see why those who drink it without milk are seen as hardy!"

Just then, Sunny went over to the counter where Alphabittle was doing... something. They then signed the deal, and off they went to the machine to do the dancing game.

Well, it went reasonably well for us, as Sunny won. Unfortunately, her horn then came off, which caused the others to turn on us.

Alphabittle looked pissed- and not to sound improper, if we hadn't intervened Sunny would probably have pissed herself. "There is no deal, spy. The only thing we do with spies is string them up- we have plenty of trees to hang your kind from. Did you really think we'd let you go and report back to your spymaster especially given Fillydelphia recently started rearming?"

But we weren't going to let a friend suffer.

So, I did the most heroic thing. I removed my horn and cast it to the ground, before stepping out into the light. "I'm an earth pony too," I said, looking Alphabittle directly in the eye. "I know I don't look like much, but if you let your bigotry consume you then you'll just be miserable."

Good thing Hitch got the idea, as he removed his as well. "I'm an earth pony as well. And I will not tolerate my friend being spoken to that way."

The room was starting to panic at a trio of earth ponies and a pegasus in the room. Which then led to Izzy pulling forward confidently.

"And I'm a unicorn! But you probably knew that already."

Misty then emerged from the side, and spoke up too. "And I'm also a unicorn, but you probably didn't know that seeing as I'm not from here."

It didn't take very long for things to fall into chaos. I stopped listening to what was being said as I tried to formulate an escape plan from this place. If we could maximize distraction and find a route to the door or a window, we could escape and be ready with all the crystals and prepared to get this magical mess fixed up and ready.

Luckily, Hitch had the same idea, and began to shout the forbidden words. "Wing! Feather! Magic! MAYONNAISE!"

Great minds think alike. As the others ran, we began to flee. Misty pulled herself free from Alphabittle and began to run, heading for the door.

I tried to follow, but then a shelf fell atop my position and blocked my path out. I was stuck in there.

As I sat there, trying to decide what to do, I heard an agonized cry.

"SPROUT!"

It was Misty! She'd noticed I was still in there! I had to get out and reunite with them or else this would all be for nothing!

The unicorns began to circle around me as I backed up towards a window. They continued to close on me, and they had seemingly recovered from the effects of the bing bonging, and had me trapped.

I looked at them. "Look, guys, maybe we can come to some sort of special arrangement about this?"

"Not a chance, spy," Alphabittle said, as he closed on me. As I said before, I'm not the strongest of guys, and this guy was a wall of muscle that towered over everything else. It was quite intimidating, actually.

He looked down at me, my eyes looking back in defiance. "And you'll have no chance with her either. I have no idea what sort of love potion you put into her head or what sort of brainwashing you put into her brain, but you will not have her. The day I let my daughter date an earth pony is the day Tartarus freezes over."

Ohhh... Misty was his kid. This is news to me!

I tried to reply. "Well, things are never quite the way they seem-"

"A demon like you doesn't deserve her. You don't deserve anypony."

Yikes. That's coming on a bit strong, buddy.

So, I had to find a way out. "You're not better than us, really," I said. "You're just as paranoid and hateful as some of the others. No wonder this world is in such a mess. Why not extend the olive branch and make friends? Trust me, it's good for your mental health."

"Are you wanting me to fry your brain, boy? At least it'll stop your babbling."

OK, that was uncalled for. "Nopony has magic, actually, so that won't work. Besides, unicorns actually can't fry brains as that would require inordinate amounts of energy to pull off. It'd be more efficient to use other means."

I reached back. The window had some bolts that were free. I knew that I could break it open with some force.

"Besides, it's far more productive to use brain teasers. What looks but has no eyes?"

They all talked amongst themselves.

Well, now or never.

Author's Note

Almost there now in terms of wrapping up my side of Phase Four for of Rebirth of Magic. :3