The psychotic gentlegriff

Princess Celestia’s POV

The griffon’s eyes widened in excitement as my chef brought out a tray. As the tray was placed in front of Anubis he began to shake in anticipation and he thanked the chef. Taking the plate of food, he began to dig in. I had never seen any-creature throw away their manners that fast before. In a matter of seconds he had devoured the fish and potato salad he was given.

Then he looked me dead in the eyes and asked for more, but how? That plate of food was massive in proportions to him and he’s still hungry? “Of course Anubis. You may have some more.”

“Thanks Celestia. This food is wonderful.”

“That’s quite alright Anubis but I’m curious. I’ve lived for well over 1000 years and I’ve never encountered a griffon that looks like you. Do you know where your parents are? If it’s not a sensitive subject for you that is?”

“Oh no not at all, but if you must know they’re dead, have been for a long time now.”

“Oh my, well I’m sorry to hear that little one… um so would you like some tea?” Tea, because tea is going to take his mind off it. Good grief Celestia what are you thinking?

“I’d love some tea please.”

Oh of course would you like milk and sugar with that?”

“Yes Celestia, two sugars please.”

I pored the hot tea into a cup and put two sugar cubes in. Then I proceeded to mix them around whilst poring the milk in and levitated the cup of tea over to him, placing it in front of him. “There you are Anubis and be careful, it’s hot.”

“Thank you Celestia, but I’ll have to warn you, it has a lot to compete with.” He said in an upper class accent, with a cheeky smile.

“Hehehe well I hope that I can meet your very high standards, Sir Anubis.”

He took a sip and began to lick his beak. “Aah yes princess this tea is truly divine, I do say that this is the second best cup of tea I’ve ever had.”

“Second? Who’s the first hm.” He said my tea was the second best cup he had ever had. How? I’ve been perfecting it for centuries.

“Oh that would be me princess, I can make a perfect cup of tea.”

“That sounds like a tall order for a little griffon.”

“Yeah well at least I don’t have long spaghetti legs and a silly mane. I make up for my hight in other ways.”

“Oh really now, in what other ways hmm?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know, dirty girl, get your mind out of the gutter.” He shook his head and sent me a knowing smirk. I felt my cheeks heat up and he burst into laughter. I can’t believe that I walked into that one. There was no way this was the same griffon I found crying in that awful place two nights ago. His behaviour is so different from what it was before. “I do not have a silly mane or spaghetti legs. Moving on, I believe that you should be in the medical wing of the castle. So how did you find your way here Anubis?”

He gave a nervous laugh, “well I may or may not of snuck away from the medical wing.”

Then my guard captain ran into the dining room and quickly stated. “Princess, I’m sorry for the interruption but the griffon cub has made a run for, it….”

“I’m not a cub I’m 17, gramps.”

“P-Princess may I ask how he got here? And I’m 29.”

“Exactly! you’re pretty much a fossil.”

“Well Captain he said that he may or may not have snuck around the castle grounds with out alerting your guards.” This got a giggle from the sneaky little griffon. And the look on my Captain’s face was amusing to say the least.

“Is that so little griffon? Mind explaining how in the Tartarus you managed that?”

“I could, buut where’s the fun in that. I guess you’ll have to train your guards to do better.” The smugness was practically flowing out of Anubis at this point. And my Captain looked as if he was going to lose his temper with him, so I intervened.

“Captain Graceful if you wouldn’t mind informing Doctor Tender Care where his patient is please? I’m sure that he’d appreciate it.”

This snapped him out of his rage induced glare at the smug griffon across the table to me. “O-Of course princess, right away.”

“Well Anubis, here comes your second plate.”

“Thank you very much but I have to ask why does your mane do that?”

“Do what?”

“What do you mean what? Don’t act dumb, you know what I mean.”

“Ooohh so you’re saying that the princess of Equestria is dumb, now.”

He quickly waved his claws and said no of course not, but then he lost balance and fell forward, smashing his beak off the table and firing the plate of food up into the air. Only to come crashing down onto his head with a heavy smash. “Oh no! Are you alright?” No response. “Anubis are you okay?” I began to worry now, he didn’t answer me and when I rounded the table there was blood gushing from his beak. “Oh no, Anubis! can you hear me? Focus on me Anubis. Look at me come on!” I had him on his stomach and leaned his head forward as to stop the blood from blocking his airways. He opened his eyes and looked up at me. He then sprung up onto his claws and pulled himself up to the table, grabbing a napkin and apologising for the mess he made. “Oh no it’s fine, but are you sure you’re okay? That was a pretty bad accident.”

“Yeah I’m fine, a nosebleed is a minor inconvenience anyway. One that I’m very accustomed to dealing with but thanks for the concern.”

“Ok I’m not buying it, you need to be treated. Luckily for you Doctor Tender Care should be on his way, as we speak. so laid down and keep your head forward.”

“But I’m…”

“Do it, Anubis Grimgost.” I ordered in a strict tone and he listened.”

———————————————————————

Anubis’s POV

Wow this is embarrassing and even tho Anubis Grimgost isn’t my real name, it still felt like I was in deep trouble for a second. But then I noticed something unusual happening with my blood. It was, flowing back up into my beak? No that’s not right, is it? No, maybe for a griffon? But that doesn’t make any sense. I could see it floating off the napkin and towards me, there was no blood on the ground anymore. But the weirdest part was I could feel it. It felt so weird, so wrong, but the biggest question was how? “Um Celestia is this normal?”

“Is what normal Anubis….” Her words died in her throat and she just stared at me in confusion and worry. “Anubis what’s happening to you, are you okay, do you feel any pain?”

“Well no but it kinda tickles a bit, but is this good or bad.”

“Hopefully good but I’ll have Doctor Tender Care examine you just to be safe.”

By the time Tender Care made it to the dining room the blood had completely disappeared back into me and my own curiosity began to reveal itself and I had to suppress the urge to investigate further. The doors opened and the red doctor trotted in with a nervous smile. “P-Princess please forgive me, I had only taken my eyes off him for a second and…”

“You are forgiven Doctor, but right now I need you to take a look at Anubis’s beak. He had smacked it off the table, it was bleeding badly. But as you can see there is a lack of said blood. That is because it began to flow back into his beak, I wanted to have you look at it for me.”

“That is very confusing but I think I got it all princess. Now, Anubis please come here so I can check your beak.” But I had already made my way to the table and grabbed a sharp knife. With one slow slice I opened up my foreleg and watched as the blood poured out. But before I could see the results of my test, I was engulfed in a gold aura and levitated to Celestia who had a mortified look on her face.

“What are you doing to yourself Anubis! Oh my that’s deep, doctor do you have a first aid kit or anything to stop the bleeding?”

“Of course Princess I’ll start right away just keep him still and use your magic to hold the wound closed whilst I clean it.”

“Can you two relax for a second please, it’s a small and controlled cut. And if my theory is correct then it’ll fix itself.” I stated in a deadpan tone.

They looked at me in disbelief and then it began to happen again. My blood was floating over to me and started flowing into the wound. But this time it stung, probably due to the nerves that it was stimulating and my body registering that I was cut. But I’ve had paper cuts that hurt more so I pulled through it. “See nothing to worry about, good as new.”

“How, how is that possible I-I don’t understand? Princess do you know what we just witnessed?”

“No. I. Don’t doctor, no I don’t. But I’m going to teleport us to the medical wing. What was Anubis’s room number?”

“It’s room 137, but princess I don’t think he’ll react well.” And before the doctor could finish, there was a bright flash and I felt like vomiting. “Anubis you’re looking a little green in the face. Are you feeling ok?”

“Yeah Celestia but please don’t do that again it feels horrible.”

“Oh I’m so sorry, I didn’t think that you would respond badly to being teleported.”

“I did try to warn you princesse, he’s not used to being teleported around. I’m impressed that you didn’t throw up your breakfast, most would have.

“Well doctor please have him looked at. And Anubis behave yourself and I might get my chefs to make you something delicious for lunch and dinner.”

“Really! I mean we’ll see how I’m feeling. Oh and by any chance can I get some flying lessons because I, um well, don’t know how to use these things?” I moved my wings and gave Celestia a sheepish smile.

“I’ll have one of my flight instructors teach you how to not only fly but to take care of your wings.”

“Yeah that would be helpful. Thank you for that, so when would I start?”

“I’ll let you know, but until then, don’t cause trouble.” As she was about to leave she stopped and turned her head to me. “Anubis, how do you feel about Mr and Miss storm? I ask because they want to take you in as their own but because of your age. You are technically a young adult.”

“Their nice… but I’ll have to think on an answer.”

And with that she teleported away. “dam I need to find a way to do that.”

“Unfortunately you can’t Anubis. Only unicorns can use magic.”

I’ve been told, I can’t or it’s impossible many times before but I’ve never listened. After all, impossible is an obstacle, over which I’ll get.

“So you’re on a first name basis with the princess.” Tender said with a smirk.

“Oh shut up dude, I didn’t even know that she was a princess until she said so.”

“Yeah right, the crown wasn’t the first clue and the fact she’s an alicorn didn’t tip you off?

“I thought you were meant to be professional with your patients?”

“How am I meant to be professional when you’ve been running around the castle like it’s a playground.”

“ Touché my good sir.”

“Oh and before I forget there was two ponies that were worried about you. Do the names Twinkle and Rustic, ring a bell?”

“Yeah i know them, why do you ask?”

“Because they thought you had died and when we told them you were fine, they caused quite the ruckus trying to find you. But you were elsewhere looking for food.”

Oh good for them, I’m almost proud in a weird way. But they should be focusing on their families, not me.