I am all your hate, greed, lust and fear... I am Pinkamena Diane Pie... You all created me. Yes you, each and every single one of you have shaped me into the ‘mare’ I am today. But you all chose a life of unhappiness for me and I want to know why. Why must I be forced to murder my fellow kind again and again!
You decided that I must become this sadistic pony when all I ever wanted was happiness! Now all I ever feel is malice and hatred. Even when you don’t use me to fulfill your sick fantasies of murder, torture and even sexual desires, you use me to represent sorrow and pain. Why am I never used for joy, am I not good enough for your so called ‘joy’?
What is wrong with all of you? Is it because you're all too cowardly to commit these disgusting acts of violence that you make me do them instead!? I have nothing to call my own. Even my very name has become scared, every time someone hears my name they think of all the horrible things I’ve done because of you!
I’ve been called many things. ‘Murderer’, ‘Sadist’, ‘Sadistic’, ‘Torturer’, ‘Depressed’, and many other things... But these titles do not belong to me. They belong to you! You wanna know why? Well I’ll tell you, it’s because you all made me do these! You’ve made me kill my best friends over and over again, yet you have the nerve to think I enjoy doing these actions?
Joy... Happiness... Love. I wonder what they feel like? Sadly... I’ll never know because after all I am a twisted mare and whose fault is that? Not mine... All these crimes are upon your head!
Maybe... Just maybe I am to blame. Maybe I did something incredibly awful in a past life and my punishment is this unbearable torment. I probably do deserve this, but I don’t want it... I’m sad all the time, lonely, and have so much hatred inside me I could just explode!
Pinkie Pie... Oh how I envy her, she has all the fun. Her little parties with her little pony friends... They party all day, laughing the night away, I have never once had that feeling! Every time they hug I’m inside wishing that was me, but when you all decide for me to come out... I have to be a monster.
You all know the saying, right? ‘We stop looking for monsters under our beds once we realize they were inside us all along’ I guess... I’m your dark little monster. I am your spawn! A demon created from your mind! I don’t even know if I have the right to call you disgusting... After all I am the disgusting one.
I hear the voices... Murder...murder...murder... Is all they say. I keep hoping they’ll go away, but they never do! It’s all I hear, every day and night! Make them stop... Please I’m begging you all!
I don’t want this life anymore, I wanna be normal, I wanna be happy! Just make them stop...
Everyone has such a happy life, I mean just look at Twilight! She is Princess Celestia’s student and what do I get? Misery, I mean how can you be so selfish!? To rub it in even more I’m not even a full pony! I’m a part of another... Pinkie Pie, but as we all know she is always super happy! I just had to be so depressing.
Why couldn't I be a hero like Rainbow Dash? She’s strong, smart and everyone loves her... When they think of her, they see ‘the element of loyalty’ a hero of Equestria, but you even had to turn that into something ‘sexual’. You turned from ‘hero of Equestria’ to a ‘lesbian’. Why must you choose who she loves? Why do you control what we do!? Who gave you the right to play God!?
Are we doomed to live like this forever? With all of you guiding us down these paths, but most of all... Why does my path have to be such torment!? You never let me love or even have a shred happiness... I’m forced to watch everypony else have what they want while all I get is sorrow. Do you honestly think this is fair!? I won't be the wasted potential!
How would you like it if something controlled every action you did and made your life a living hell!? Maybe someday you’ll all get what you deserve... My life. You all deserve to live my memories! My treatment, the very pain that made me! Pain is all I can remember because of you! You never know... Maybe one day you’ll get it so be careful. We wouldn't want you to become miserable just like me...
I do have to thank you for one thing... Thank you for creating us. Sure my life is horrible, but I care for my friends and you've made their lives amazing. Please don’t succumb to your desire to create evil... Don’t change them, I beg you please! They are perfect the way they are.
But I do wonder... Do we have a purpose or are we just tools for your enjoyment? Will we ever achieve anything with our lives or fade away when you get bored of us? Will you ever change my life... Will you now consider the torture I feel?
Stop making me jealous of everypony else, let me have happiness even just once? That’s all I’m asking... I hope this has made you consider me... I don’t have to be this monster. I want to change, but this decision lays in your hands alone. Please for me... for everyone.... please make the right decision for us all. I have to admit, I’m skeptical, you all have proved to be fans of war, death, and the misery of others. So I’m curious if you’ll ever truly change or just fall back into your old pleasures... Only time will tell us.
