Cold winds swept over the snow-laden city.
The silver night sky twinkled as the rushed footsteps of she ran into the night. Glass chips and blood fell from her face. Leaving behind the smashed bottle, and the snickering pub, her legs sped onward. The hazy, cheap light of the establishment soon gave way to barely illuminated streets. She ran through the city, an endless corridor, a maze of sidewalks and alleys, not caring where she would go.
It hurt. She hurt. Why must they hurt her?
She shivered. Torn jeans and a ragged t-shirt were nothing against the environment.
On and on she ran, ignoring any scrap of logic. The more she ran, the less she’d have to think. Stars, both dim and bright, swirled at the edges of her vision. Only they distracted her from her clouded mind of instinct. A spot of sweetness on the dreary night, in this rampage of movement. Though it did little to inspire her broken heart, they kept her going. A small glimmer, just like her name was.
What an ironic name for this cruel world.
The farther she went, the more exhausted she became. The thoughts she had sought to avoid came in. It urged her to keep running, exhausting her faster. Still, she must flee, to a comfort unknown with no safety or sanctuary possible. Sleeping in the streets was not an option, nor had she anywhere else to go. She’d lost all possessions in her confounding escape.
Rounding a corner, with nothing but darkness ahead, she collided with something.
She was twisted to the left, causing her already wounded face to hit the brick and bleed further. A clatter of objects scattered as she did so. A muck of surprise and footsteps clamoring backward sounded. She froze in place, standing huddled against the wall, expecting retribution for causing another person trouble. Quivering, she bit her lip, waiting for something, anything, bad to happen. As if who was wasn’t enough.
Nothing came–she reluctantly opened her eyes, finding her fair, blue-skinned classmate staring back, in mutual disbelief.
“Glimmer?” Trixie, in a horrified tone, cried out.
So her classmate hated her too. Now what?
Quickly, Trixie stuffed her phone, keys, and wallet in her back pocket. She sprinted over, ignoring and leaving her assorted belongings in the street for others to find. Starlight stood there, shaking, unsure of what to do. She watched as Trixie ripped off her long sleeve, exposing her arm to the elements. She advanced with it in hand.
This was it. More pain.
Again, Starlight feared the worst, letting herself into another upheaval of expectations.
As Starlight remained petrified, Trixie wrapped one arm around her shoulders to stabilize her. Next, she mopped the blood off Starlight’s assaulted face. Gently, Trixie subtly guided her around the corner and down the sidewalk. It took a few moments for Starlight to accept the maneuvers at first. Slowly, she crept forth, unsure of what else she could or should do. Trixie was helping… rather than harming her.
Her heart felt afraid, in the black pit it resided. She looked at the stars once for an answer.
They seemed to shimmer a little bit. A small sliver of that light fell into her abyss.
It felt delivered through the hands guiding her.
Eased little by little, she followed Trixie off the sidewalk, up a small set of stairs, through a door, up a flight, and into a room numbered 765. Blasts of heat brought feeling into her numb body. The shivering collapsed altogether as she laid onto someone’s couch with a gifted blanket. These were Trixie’s belongings, she guessed, in the stormy sea her mind felt. Weakly, she accepted a bottle of water.
Why was she being helped? She didn’t deserve it. No one like her did. And yet-
“Are you okay?” Trixie appeared in her peripheral vision, kneeling down to match eye level.
Starlight found herself suddenly forgetting how to speak. Lacking reason to or will. She focused on Trixie, beside the couch with a white kit. She took a small sip.
“Take your time.”
While she thought, Trixie worked away to cleanse her injuries. She took out every single shard and disinfected every single porous. Bit by bit, the wounds beneath were revealed. Though no bandages were needed, it felt like there should be some. Starlight knew there would be scars. As permanent as who she was. A small spark ignited in her as if fusion occurred.
“I…” she stuttered.
Trixie’s small smile was warm, giving full attention.
“Do you know… who I am?”
“That is a question with many answers,” Trixie said, almost done. “What does it mean to you?”
“It means…”
Though the events from hours ago were fresh, compelling themselves to stay inside, somehow being in Trixie’s presence caused her to swell out. Peering through the cracks in the curtain, the moon, though obscured by clouds, still clung on to light the darkness. Starlight felt herself convulsing, crying, letting it all out for no reason. Her heart went supernova.
Despite the teary trembling, Trixie completed the task of shrapnel removal. Afterward, it remained phantomly agonizing due to the damage her nerves suffered. Still, it was now ready to heal in due time. Trixie stayed by Starlight thereafter, an arm on her shoulders. The tears streamed onward. Starlight had a faint feeling it didn’t matter that the couch was soaked.
Eventually, her tongue felt compelled to move again.
Whether it had been minutes or hours since her last statement she did not know.
Looking again, the stars flickered on.
She knew not why she felt even slightly alright in this stranger’s home.
“I… was with this guy…”
Trixie nodded, following along.
“Someone else…”
“Said something?” Trixie deduced.
Starlight sniffled, indicating a yes.
“What happened then?”
Silence ensued.
“The others there…. didn’t accept you,” Trixie inferred, putting it lightly.
Starlight simply nodded. She breathed in and breath out, chest rising and lowering like molasses. She was an emotional wreck. Trixie stayed by her side with her all the same.
“... they pointed out I’d been there before with a girl…
“There is nothing wrong with that, Glimmer,” Trixie stated.
Why wasn’t it wrong? Why was she opening up to someone who could easily take advantage?
Even so, recalling earlier sent a violent shudder through her. A few more tears rolled. Trixie tightened her arm wrapping around her shoulder to be more comforting. It wasn’t quite a hug, but she could tell the sentiment was the same. Repressed memories ascended from the dusty nebula inside Starlight to the forefront of her thoughts.
For so long, she’d kept to herself, watching others be hurt for openly being who they were. Was that why she felt… guilty? For each time she acted as who she was? It eventually became internalized, to hide herself in the shadows. To snuff her spark amongst the embers of others.
A crack opened in her void, rippling in the corner of her mind.
Perhaps… it wasn’t wrong. No matter what others… might think.
Glimmer looked at Trixie.
“You mean it?”
Trixie dipped her head to acknowledge her.
“No, there is absolutely nothing wrong with liking everyone, no matter what anyone says.”
“But he didn’t….”
“Did nothing to help you, Starlight, and is worthless, doesn’t deserve you.”
A spike jumped in her heart. It would explain why he didn’t quite feel right.
“Then why… did I… I’m so stupid!”
Starlight burst out in sudden panic, feeling herself on the verge of breaking down. How could she not have foreseen how others wouldn’t understand-
“Calm down, inhale, exhale, and count to ten,” Trixie instructed.
In and out, one to ten, in and out, one to ten, in and out, one to ten.
“You are sometimes confused, Glimmer, and that is alright. You are someone, and you are special in your way. They are the stupid ones for not recognizing that.”
So many contradictory thoughts flooded her head. While she contemplated quietly, Trixie delivered another water, which she slipped into her lukewarm hands. Sip after sip, the night went on, no longer cold. She couldn’t find a reason to talk again. So much she could share, so many times to run away from her confusing classmate, out into the night. Starlight rested her aching self on the couch. She felt bound to stay.
Staring into the blue inkiness of the night skies, the stars grew brighter to her, calling down to her. Perhaps there was something in this world for her, broken as it was. Broken as she felt at this moment. She was vulnerable, yet Trixie was not exploiting that. She didn’t know why. She couldn’t comprehend it. But it felt like the first right thing in a very, very long time.
Time passed, and she realized she was growing weary. The buzz in her head subsided, giving way to a strange sense of peace–for once. Trixie appeared to recognize this, as she shut off the lights, turned off any possible sounds, and brought in a pillow. Her classmate didn’t seem to think that who she liked, everyone, should matter in how she should be treated.
One thing felt off, however, as Trixie set herself on the living room floor, that Trixie didn’t mention the course of tonight. Starlight tucked in regardless.
Her mind found it as she found herself falling asleep.
“Trixie?” she called into the dimness.
“Yes, Starlight?”
“Didn’t you have a magic show tonight?”
“You were more important, and needed help.”
“But I’m… but I-”
“Who you decide to love, Glimmer, has no relevance to how I or others should act or help.”
Silence.
She noticed herself crying a little bit.
“Thank… you…”
“You are welcome, Starlight Glimmer.”
Soon, she found herself asleep.
She awoke to a lucid landscape. Stars shone brightly in the dark yet illuminated night sky. A warm breeze swirled around. Though she felt alone, Starlight saw the silver lining ahead, all over the skies, those like her. She felt a smile creep up as she gazed into the blackness.
She was who she was. Nothing was wrong with that.
And maybe, just maybe, she could find a glass bottle to smash back at the world that had rejected her.
Author's Note
Star light, star bright,
First star I see tonight;
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have the wish I wish tonight
