This is Vinyl Tap!

by Navy Shadow

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, DJ P0N-3, Lyra, Octavia, Comedy, Derpy Hooves
Length: 1276

Vinyl Scratch starts a band with Octavia, Lyra and Derpy, Hilarity follows

Vinyl Scratch starts a band with Octavia, Lyra and Derpy... Oh god please help our souls.

Published 2012-09-30 08:24:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-30 08:24:01 UTC

Vinyl Tap

A quiet day in Ponyville, everypony was out doing their jobs. Derpy was delivering her mail and Rainbow Dash was keeping the skies clear. Vinyl Scratch however was in her home, thinking of ideas for a new band which would include only the best musical ponies in Ponyville: Octavia and Lyra.

Vinyl was missing one person though, she needed this to be a four person band. Vinyl was singing, Octavia was playing the Cello, Lyra was playing the Lyre... Of course Octavia and Lyra knew nothing about this band idea yet, but Vinyl knew they'd agree to it if she showed them both the work she's put in.
She had ideas for names written on a notepad being held by her magic:

Scratch n the gang

It's all about scratch

Neon Dancers

VINYL TAP

Vinyl Tap was the name she liked the most but she still needed that fourth band member. She needed that member to come flying through her window. Hopefully with a muffin and money to repair the window.

And then it hit her... and by it, I mean Derpy.

Derpy had flown through the window with a muffin on her head, she instantly regretted smashing Vinyl's windows and pulled some bits out of her saddlebag and laid them out on the table before giving Vinyl a smile.
Vinyl was just speechless, sat there, nursing her head... for about twenty seconds.

"Derpy... have I ever told you that I loved you?"

"Nope! But you should because then I would say the same and we would be best friends forever!" Derpy was about to go on a rant until Vinyl shoved a hoof in her mouth

"Please, don't talk..."
Derpy nodded her head in understanding and Vinyl removed the hoof

"Derpy, can you play an instrument?" Vinyl asked the gray mare who was standing there staring at her... or the floor, Vinyl couldn't tell..

Derpy was silent.

"Erm... you can speak now."

"Nope, what's an instrument? Is it a flavour of muffin I haven't tried yet?"
Vinyl put her face in her hooves. 'No... She is the destined one... she must be tested!'

"Derpy... Follow me."

Vinyl started to walk to the basement of her house and Derpy followed close behind.
Vinyl's basement was a music nerd's heaven. Instruments of multiple types scattered across the floor, a recording booth powered by raw magical energy, magic powered microphones that amplified and changed your voice. Derpy was amazed at all these new things scattered all over the floor. Vinyl grabbed a guitar and gave it her, telling her to go into the recording booth.

Once in, Vinyl hit a button outside so that she could be heard inside the booth.

"Alright Derpy, you know how to play this right?"

"Erm, I think?"

"Just... give it your best shot!" Vinyl faked a smile to reassure Derpy.

Derpy looked at the guitar in her hooves and started to play with the strings. They made a noise which frightened Derpy. All Vinyl saw was the guitar flying at the recording booth window and Derpy attached to the ceiling moments after

"Okaaaaay... So guitar isn't your strong point - got it"

Vinyl, scared for her own life, ran inside the recording booth to clean up the mess. Vinyl's version of cleaning anyway, which was shove everything in a random corner and forget it ever existed.
"Next we have the drums, nopony can mess this up!"
Vinyl set the drums up in the recording booth, Derpy however was still attached to the ceiling.

"You know... you can come down now...?"

"Oh, okay then!" Derpy flew down and took the newly placed seat

"Right... These things make a noise when you hit them with these sticks, got it?"

"Got it, I won't be scared this time, promise!"

"Alright... lemme just get out before you start playing..."

Vinyl run out of the booth and slammed the door shut as quickly as possible

"OK, you're cleared to go Derpy!"

Derpy nodded and picked up the sticks, striking one of the drum pads softly, it made a small noise and Derpy pulled away, but came back for another strike against a different drum, she was amused to hear that they all sounded different. She started to gain confidence and gave the drum pads harder hits.

After a while Derpy was starting to become good and even Vinyl thought she was doing well. Gaining a confidence boost Derpy started to hit the pads even harder with the sticks. A tearing sound was heard and the drum beats stopped as one of the sticks was put through one of the drum pads, Derpy looked at Vinyl with a small smile.

"I just don't know what went wrong!"

Vinyl facehoofed again and walked upstairs, telling her clumsy friend to stay where she was
She managed to get a message to Octavia and Lyra to come over to her home immediately, and that Derpy wanted to try their instruments.

***

"She is NOT using my Cello, Vinyl!" Octavia said as she looked over to the pile of guitar bits and ripped drums in the corner of the recording booth
"Ever..."

"Well I'm pretty sure its hard to break a Lyre so she can try this....”

Lyra handed the Lyre to Derpy and walked out of the recording booth.

"Lyra, do YOU even know how to play that?" Vinyl quizzed

"Nope, but it can't be too hard. I can manage to make beautiful music just by plucking the strings."
Derpy looked at the Lyre in her hooves and plucked a string just like the guitar.

It broke.

Lyra rushed in and took the Lyre before derpy could do any more damage to it.

"Oh my beauty, Mommy's here... Mommy's here"

Derpy just sat there with the same silly smile she always had.

"Okay guys I have to tell you now, I was thinking of forming a band with you three. Called... Vinyl Tap." Vinyl confessed to her friends.

"Why in Celestia's name would I join a band with you, a pony obsessed with hands and a clumsy idiot?" Octavia acted like this was obvious.

"I actually don't know, seemed like a good idea at the time..."

"One gig... I'll do one gig and thats it!"

"HELLO EVERYPONY, MY NAME IS VINYL SCRATCH AND THIS IS VINYL TAP!"

Everypony in the club gave a small cheer as they saw the 4 Mares take position. Derpy was on drums again, as that seemed to be the only thing she was even remotely good at. Octavia had her cello and Lyra her ...lyre.

"WE ARE HERE TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT DEATH AND GET SAD AND STUFF!"

And so they played as well as they could, halfway through the first song Derpy broke her drums and flew up to the ceiling again, scared she had ruined the performance, whereas in fact she had improved it.
At the end of their song Derpy flew down and joined the others ready for a cheer whereas instead they got drinks and food thrown at their faces.

"Vinyl, that is the LAST TIME, I repeat THE LAST TIME I EVER help you with a stupid idea... EVER" Octavia was furious and stormed off.
Lyra had already disappeared and now it was just Derpy and Vinyl, they stared at each other for a good five seconds before Derpy finally said something

"Nice work Vinyl Scratch!"

And then she flew off, mail had to be delivered by someone...
Vinyl sat there for a good 5 minutes on her own before finally speaking, if only to herself

"What the buck have I done with my life..."