Dennis EwƎ ƨinnɘᗡ

by Fireflower

Rating: teen
Tags: Profanity, Big Macintosh, Random, Violence, Slice of Life, Crossover, Alternate Universe, South Park, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Mayor Mare, Rarity, Other, Mr. Cake
Length: 1207

A simple challenge for the sake of a contest: a prize to be claim if possible; a crossover experiment in the end so to speak of. Failing that, a short story with low expectations and higher inquiries based on its contents in question nevertheless...

They say that music soothes the savage beast, an idiom as old as time and the modern world was no exception, despite their changes; even now, it'd wielded the power and potential to basically unite its listeners whether in proximity or distance altogether so to speak of: Equestria harnessed that power, with and without the Elements themselves, but that constant had been common knowledge all the same as is.

Of course, there were other countries, like and unlike them, which had their own unique talents, persistences, and resolves too: Neighpon, for all its differences between themselves and the outside world, was the epicenter of its own culture due to their upbringing; granted, similar ideas could be found elsewhere too but it didn't stop the equivalent exchanges either way, nations, creeds, and inhabitants.

Speaking of which, the landscape had changed one day when one popular song out of many had basically entered the forefront: little could be said about it freely except the lyrics were so filthy, airwaves were restricted around the young and old alike either way; still, despite their best efforts, individually and collectively, excerpts would find their way out into the open world, near consequences notwithstanding.

An entry for the A Thousand Words Contest II in the Comedy category.

Published 2023-07-30 13:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-07-30 13:50:01 UTC

Maximum the Hormone

Author's Note

My name is Fireflower and this is my fifth My Little Pony Fanfic, using normal canon characters that is rated T for Teen; therefore, it is no clopfic whatsoever but it does have some moments of distress to a small extent: as a matter of fact, it took me about over an hour to make this because it's going to be another contest entry y'all know of so to speak.

Anyways, I just want to state for the record, aside from My Little Pony, or rather Friendship Is Magic along with its setting and characters belonging to Lauren Faust and Hasbro, the character on the cover is based on Denji from Chainsaw Man by Tatsuki Fujimoto, but he won't be the only character out of place in a world full of ponies, canon and otherwise.

Enjoy it while you can 'cause this was inspired by one too many listenings of Kenshi Yonezu amongst other things no less; in fact, South Park also played a significant role in the making along with The Boondocks as well as Victor and Valentino: spot the references and leave a comment about them once you finish this story here and there, rest assured nevertheless.

Maximum the Hormone

It was a bright and sunny day here in an otherwise sleepy town made up of straws, sticks, bricks, mortars, and even a pestle as is: considering the flora and fauna living in a perfect checks and balances of peace with harmony, it’d even be smelt and dealt too; however, the atmosphere was under pressure, pushing down on the landscape with its heavy weapons concentrated in its aura.

The source of it was coming from a circular building out in the middle of town, ligneous to a fault but otherwise filled by life: it was surrounded by equines, great and small with variations, known and unknown, present and accounted for with one another; of course, the commonality between them was the fierce grimaces shaken and stirred upon their own visages, nothing more.

“Alright, citizens, we are all extremely upset over what’s happened, but let’s try to speak one at a time…” one of them had announced instantaneously so to speak of, a lightly tanned mare with white hair and eyes of a raging tsunami mere moments away from massacring the approaching shoreline even though her peers weren’t the target of such impending doom and gloom no less.

A big crimson stallion, gingerly in appearance with solid jade containing the acid, had taken the time to rise up and speak freely, monotone as he was without a need for a spotlight besides the sun, “well, like the rest of y’all, Ah am shocked and appalled at what happened: Ah don’t know if the parents are t’ blame or if it’s the times we’re living in, but something has to change…!”

“Yeah…!” cried the audience around him as the heat was on and off, generating itself through the collective will and power of, for, and by the ponies for the most part; even though she was assaulted by their forte, her eyes showed restraint, far more compared to the rather thin glasses overlaying them both as they’d been turned away to a linear direction all the same, “I agree…!”

“This is the worst thing that’s happened in this town, the worst thing…!” cried another mare, this time a white unicorn and more colorful in the horsehair department alone, especially since both of them had big blue eyes; however, the former had shadows and length enhancing them as hell and highwater banded together in an uneasy alliance upon the land of the living as they all were.

Another ginger stallion, albeit smaller and yellow as a cake devoid of uranium, had chimed into the fray, his octaves higher than his burning hot counterpart but otherwise firm and stable herein, “yeah, I mean there wee foals listening in the concert and when that wretched teenager walked around and sanged that song, it was an outrage… a blooming onion’s worth of it nonetheless…!”

“Not only that, the concert was being filmed in front of a live studio audience so my nietos watching at home heard the lyrics…!” hissed yet another mare, now a pink pegasus with straight black tresses with sunglasses over her indignant gaze as a balance betwixt the old and young since they were both restless in their legs, “how am I supposed to explain that to them both?!”

“This is what happens when the moral fabric of society breaks down…!” an additional myopic meanderer announced had, gray as the rock without moss with both eyes were lighter in color compared to the primordial and the opalescent mare tied into a bun devoid of flavor and aroma, something which had sat the mare apart from the rest of the herd they were all currently inside.

Another unicorn, nearsighted as the many mares were, stood up close and personal with a short brown mane, eyes reddened as the giant from afore with a white coat over his beige integuments, “you see the damage you’ve caused, sick dastard; what were you thinking: that you were going to get some chicks singing that song like it was going out of business faster than Bravomax…?”

“I told you it was an earworm infection: I’d tried getting it out myself but the stupid thing kept finding its way back to me…!” another pony stood mere meters away from the tanned mare, a blond stallion with an orange range of cuts and bruises as is, “I even took the liberty of sewing my lips shut for the time being and wore a mask over it; shouldn’t it count for something…?”

“Uh, yeah… I agree: our friend’s autistic damaged mind couldn’t make out what the lyrics had meant; Dennis should be punished and transformed: I say we tar and feather this stupid prick…!” a young colt replied, yet another ginger except without freckles as his attire had consisted of an emerald splashed hat and pants combo with an orange coat over the taupe epidermis already.

An aged zebra with a short hairstyle of white trotted along as one of his eyes had a shrunken pupil devoid of details, carrying a bucket and a mop of black liquid and cleared oxygen said, “way ahead of you: it’s about high time these Neighps learn to keep their wordplay out of the youngins’ ears; he makes Li’l Gabby High sound like a joke and he worships the archdevil…!”

“Screw you, old jade…!” the battered bystander barked before being besieged by an abundance of the elder’s contents without any warning as is; soon enough, the former was now covered from head to tail as its solid texture clung unto the integumentary system already, “what the fuck did you do to me: why is it all so wet and sticky…?”

“Ponies these days need to have some respect for their elders, no matter how old they get; besides, your J–Rock is but a gateway drug that makes all the stanky booty guerilla noise here too coherent…!” the aged zebra replied before bursting with laughter, his sights already being treated to the condition of the blackened blond burping up tar from every orifice, known and unknown.