Destroy yourself or... Destroy YourSelf

Name: Dean Tyronus Hanma Starfield
Title: Pig
Age: 23
Plane: Spiritual
Location: Mindscape
Time: Irrelevant

"Oi, fat ass."

Anger blossomed into his being before he could even properly open his eyes.

Jumping out of the ground he put his guard up and snapped his face towards the voice.

And just as before, there it was, Yuujirou Hanma's grinning form.

"I will talk, and you will listen."

He forced himself to stay calm.

"Ogre, I did not expect you to be a talkative man."

Dean said playfully while still on guard, his non-existent muscles refusing to relax for even a fraction of a second.

No matter how many fights he had with the man Yuujirou Hanma always made him stand on edge.

He understood, of course, he did.

After all, what kind of fool would stand calm while a demon talked to them?

Not even Baki Hanma could, what hope did he have?

Tch*

"I am not, but I decided to give you a warning nonetheless, so listen well boy."

In a second the Ogre appeared in front of him.

'Teleportation?!'

The thought came instantly, and just as quickly he dismissed it.

Yuujirou Hanma didn't depend on something as ridiculous as a superpower to be strong.

Only himself.

0.005 to 0.02 seconds, this is the time a signal from the brain takes to be received by any limb and acted upon.

A ridiculously low amount of time, one many could argue to be irrelevant in the context of human perception.

Not to him, however.

Why? Simple, Yuujirou Hanma is faster than that.

With a speed greater than sound Dean saw and felt what happened before he heard it.

The ogre disappeared.

Inexistent air exploded behind him.

Then, he suddenly appeared again.

The shockwave reached him.

It all happened in mere nanoseconds.

For him, it felt instantaneous.

BOOM!

He was forced to shield his eyes from the wind as his ears began to bleed, the sound being loud enough to turn him deaf for a moment.

Something held his wrist.

He was not fast enough to react.

With a single hand, the ogre effortlessly held both of his arms together.

Crack!

Bones snapped as the Ogre squeezed his hand, as he did so veins exploded and muscles tore open under the pressure of the man's fist.

He couldn't move.

Not because of the pain, shock, or even fear, but because something was holding him in place.

All around his body, he felt as if the very air tried to crush him.

"Ughk!"

His vision started to turn black as his eyes slowly bent inward, blood leaking from beneath them all the while.

In a second, however, the pressure lowered.

Acting quickly he pushed his body up by anchoring himself in the ogre's hold and threw a knee at his chin.

"BASTARD!"

Crack!

"Ahgk!"

Only to freeze and howl in pain as the pressure came back twice as strong.

Constant exposure to pain did not turn him immune to it, only tolerant.

And much like Will, the pain the soul can feel does not have a defined threshold, the higher one's will the higher all other emotions can be felt.

In other words, the pain he is feeling from his muscles, bones, and skin could be compared to losing limbs.

Something that the Ogre can surely increase if he so wished.

Crack!

As his body was slowly crushed under the pressure the ogre looked dully at him.

Opening his mouth the strongest creature spoke with a calm tone, that of a teacher educating a child in the simplest of things.

"We are in the mindscape boy, a spiritual plane, in the material world it might be hard to affect anything outside of the body with the soul, but here? It's another thing completely."

He lowered his head and glared at Dean's eyes, his face stoic like that of a man without a drop of patience to waste.

"If I don't want you to move, you won't."

From one moment to the other, the Ogre freed his hands, the next all he could see was an open palm closing in on his face.

‘Wha-’

Boom!

“!”

With a slap, his body was sent hurling back through the air.

His vision turned blurry and confusing as lost all sense from up to down, contrary to the previous time, however, he had a plan.

It is somewhat humiliating but he can confidently say he has more experience in this situation than he'd like.

And experience brings proficiency.

Hitting the ground with his elbow he reduced both his speed and impact, by the time he hit the ground for the third time he was able to stop his impromptu flight.

Kneeling on the white soil he slowly lifted himself and put a hand on his face.

Dip*

Blood dripped from his nose.

It hurt.

But nothing broke.

And that alone disturbed him more than anything.

"In this place the strong rule in a way the material world cannot express boy, I might not be able to dispatch you for good but I can do everything else, so understand it, while here..."

The ogre's tone deepened as his eyes narrowed.

"I am God."

TRRRRRRRRRR!!!

The world suddenly exploded in green and brown as things surged from the ground at a speed his eyes couldn't properly keep up with.

Even then he only managed to do so for a second, the next, the ground started to shake.

All he heard before the earthquake threw him to the ground was the distinct sound of wood rubbing against itself.

Crack!

"Aghk!"

Something hit his back as he fell, the thing hit with enough force to fracture his bones, had he been in his physical body that is.

Here? It punctured through his skin and kept trying to force its way in.

Had it slammed him against a wall beforehand Tyronus is absolutely sure he would have a hole coming from his chest and reaching his back now.

Not stopping the thing kept pushing him upward, its speed far too high for him to try and escape, as he ascended inexistent air hit his face forcing his lips to open and his skin to deform.

For a second, as he watched far away lights lit up in the void he thought whether or not the thing wanted to throw him out of the planet.

'Wait, planet?'

Just for it to abruptly stop and throw him spinning through the air.

Butterflies formed in his stomach as he felt himself slowly losing speed.

'20 meters, 40 meters?' He didn't know how high up he was, all he knew was that he would fall very soon if nothing changed.

Worse yet he has no idea whatever the durability of his soul will save him.

His heart raced.

Thump!*
Thump!*
Thump!*

Dying didn't bother him much, but the idea of doing so by falling was far too humiliating for him to accept.

His ascension finally stopped, and for a moment, he stood completely still, feeling the cool breeze hitting his face, he was finally able to properly look at the world around him.

Only to freeze in his senseless movements as he couldn't quite believe what his eyes were telling him.

The sky.

The night sky, full of stars, stood above him.

The moon shone a deep blue as its light, brighter than any he had ever seen shone upon him.

And then, he started to fall.

"Aaaaaaaah!"

Spinning wildly he attempted to do something, anything, but no matter what he tried or how he moved his descent kept being just as wild as before.

Kri... kri, krikrikrikrikri
krikrikriKRIKRIKRIKRIKRI

Dozens of small branches snapped as his body crashed upon them.

"Ite!"

Shouting in pain he put his hands in front of his face and tried to protect his eyes as the wood cut his skin.

Dozens of cuts formed in seconds, each stinging just as much as the first, the skin from his legs, arms, and stomach were all cut as the branches snapped.

Thud*

Crack!

Pain shot from his entire body as he finally crashed, the sensation alone made him certain that if he wasn't in soul form his bones would have broken like twigs.

Luckily the soul is stronger than his meat suit.

Groaning loudly he lifted himself from the grassy soil.

'Thank the sta- worlds above those things didn't have thorns.'

Looking down he saw the branches on the soil, a brief sense of relief washing over him at the scene.

'And that they didn't fall upwards.'

Shaking his head he ignored the dripping blood and the wounds on his arm as he looked around himself.

Once more his eyes widened at the scene.

In front of him stood a forest, an entire damn forest, one that sprouted out of nowhere.

The experience, even after the last days, was so surreal he felt as if he was transported to another world again.

If it weren't for that tree almost passing through his back and the strange sensation he could feel throughout this entire space he'd have believed just that.

Not only that but…

He couldn't quite explain it but, he could feel it, somehow the white space was still there, just… below it?

For seconds his mind worked on overdrive as he took the scenery into his view.

Thinking, guessing, and theorizing what could have made it possible.

And then, in mere seconds, he understood.

'Imagination manifestation?.'

The scene, no, sensation reminded him of the time when Baki Hanma formed an image of a triceratops during that fight.

Much like it, he theorized that Yuujirou could do the same in this place, changing the surroundings as if they were a picture he could make at any time with his mind.

'No… that's not quite right.'

Changing was not the right word.

It was more like… like he painted a world above the white of the easel.

For many, this would seem simply as an amazing supernatural feat, for him however, it was different, everything, from the trees to the sky to the grass to the moon, everything felt…

'Disturbing.'

That's the only word he could find to describe the place, it felt… quiet, far too quiet, dead even, as if only the two of them existed in this little forest.

Even more, he felt like he was looking at a mirage, something not… true.

When looking at Baki's imagination manifestation triceratops style he felt amazed, like that creature really was there, like it was real.

This, however, is different.

The sensation didn't have quite a material world equivalent, but if he had to describe it…

He'd say he felt like he was looking at a lie.

He put his finger on his chin as he started to walk in circles.

But… why? Why did this forest disturb him so much? It was quiet, yes, but it was just a forest, right?

‘No, this… isn't a forest.’

His eyes widened in realization, he understands, he finally understands it.

His feelings, why he felt disturbed, why he was so uncomfortable, why everything felt so unreal.

He understood it all.

'No, no, no,nononono.'

And it scared him more than anything.

Snapping his body towards the still form of the Ogre a nervous smile formed on his face.

"Oi, you're joking, right?"

His body trembled as he almost beat himself for what he had done.

"You've been here for only seven days you fucker, and you can do shit like this already?"

He did it, the stupidest thing any human could ever do.

His voice wavered, and the Ogre's smile widened.

His mocking smile.

"Good, at least you are not an idiot."

He underestimated the Ogre.

His smile widened even more as he spoke with a condescending tone.

"I'd hate to have to explain even the little things."

He understands it, this place feels fake because it is.

According to the memories he got from the Ogre during his deaths, in his infancy, more specifically the day he was born Yuujirou Hanma was capable of transmitting his thoughts to the mind of his mother.

Much like he is able to transmit his wish to kill through his aura.

The so-called 'Killing intent' is nothing but the ogre sending information directly to the brain of his victim on how much he wants to kill them.

No, not only their brain but every part of their body, every cell, limb, vein, and nerve.

Backed up by the strength of the 'signal' the brain reacts in a… curious way.

By conjuring self-made images of Yuujirou doing just that, killing them over and over again.

In other words, the brain is tricked into fully believing what is happening, the thoughts sent to it being so powerful it thinks they are its own.

The sensation that comes, the pain of non-existent attacks is nothing but the mind fully immersing itself in the 'truth' the Ogre forced upon them.

And… he improved it.

That bastard improved it.

Within only seven days the Ogre made it so his so-called 'signal' could not only reach the brain but also the soul, something he could previously do, but now it is much more refined.

Refined enough to trick his soul into believing an entire forest is in front of him, all without even alerting his conscious mind.

And considering this place is his mindscape it reacted to 'his' thoughts and made the implanted belief into the easel that was his mindscape true.

Perhaps a random fool might not quite understand what that alone means, but not him.

He understands everything.

If that man continues to improve he will one day reach the point of being able to do the same thing as that Celestial, and fully kill his Self by tricking him into believing he has no will.

If that happened… he would not be able to come back.

Deep down he knew the Ogre would not lower himself to tricks like these.

The man would not accept killing his soul in any other way than beating him into submission, he knows it.

He’d do the same after all.

But… the fear, no, the terror ALL of his selves felt at the mere possibility of him reaching that level was enough to shake him.

Ttttttttttttttttt!

His teeth chattered as his body trembled uncontrollably.

He knows the illusion isn't real, but he doesn't have the strength to push through it.

With his will alone the Ogre forced him to see a lie.

His mind, not having the strength to fight, was forced to put the image of the forest in front of him.

And much like a man clasping someone's hand and forcing them to draw something the 'image' didn't have his style.

Hence why he felt like everything was wrong.

It was something forced, wrong, a Lie in every extent of the concept.

The Ogre isn't making the illusion, he is.

And he can't do a damn thing about it.

No… that's not quite right, he can do something about it.

He just won't succeed.

But then again…

'Fuck it.'

The inevitability of failure shouldn't have ever stopped him before.

He'll make sure it won't do so now.

He is a man who will accomplish the impossible after all.

What is the strongest creature before his will?

Flexing his muscles Dean forced his body to tremble less, seconds passed as he breathed steadily, slowly he lifted his head, looked at the Ogre.

And smiled.

"Just one time."

He couldn't help it.

"You saw that thing doing it one time, and replicated it, without magic nonetheless."

The thought of surpassing this man even in these hopeless circumstances.

"You know I had forgotten how much of a genius you are Ogre, Spirit, Body, and now even the Mind, you really are awesome Yuujirou-san."

Excited him to no end.

His lips opened forcibly as a too-wide smile formed on them.

"Still, I ask myself…"

He breathed deeply, the smile on his face refused to leave him as his voice deepened.

"How will you feel when I surpass you even in that?"

His smile widened even more as the blood in his body kept falling.

That monster… really made him want to use everything he had to beat him!

Death of self or victory against the strongest.

An ultimatum to his very soul.

He liked that, he liked that very, very much.

The ogre put his hands in his pockets as if completely uninterested in the scene before him.

"I don't care if you die, lose a limb, get blind or become a vegetable but… I don't want a fun thing like you to break so soon, so, hear me, and hear me well."

Still with a crazed smile on his face, Dean blocked one of his nozis and exhaled.

Krrrr*

Blood shot out of his nozis in droves, briefly, he thought about whether or not the soul even had a limit to how much blood it could simulate.

Not that it matters, if it doesn't, he’ll put one.

Doing the same for his other nozis he stared intensely at the Ogre, the man had spent 7 entire days inside the spiritual realm, maybe more due to however time dilation worked inside this place.

Even if he wanted to do nothing more than run forward and punch him he forced himself to stay put, if the Ogre wanted to tell him something, it must be important.

"This." He gestured to the place around him. "Is the place where the very essence of a fight can fully manifest."

The strongest creature’s voice reverberated throughout the forest, deep and powerful were the only words he could find to describe them.

"If will is grown through hardship and training then a fight here is nothing more than a contest of who passed, suffered, fought, and most importantly of all surpassed the most in their lives."

Maybe one day he will have that same voice.

"A fight of wills in the most literal sense, my history, against yours."

The voice of a man confident in his Self.

"As the state of the soul reflects the state of the body, allowing it to possess incredible strength proportional to its will and fighting spirit, so does the wounds of the soul reflect on the body."

Unconsciously Dean touched his chest.

"You understand it right? Your wounds only appeared after you remembered your previous death when you finally Achieved Mind over matter."

Thump!*

"In other words, if we fight now, you will most certainly die in the material world, ha!, although it would be fun to see the face of that creature when she sees your mangled corpse I have no wish to end you before you become something fun to play with."

He laughed some more.

"But neither will I stop killing you here boy if you give up, I will steal your body, carcass or not I am sure I can find a way to heal it.”

Suddenly, the ogre appeared in front of him.

"You have a day to find something to help you, if you don't, then prepare to die tonight."

The last thing Dean felt was something hitting his head before he went down.
.
.
.
.

Name: Dean Tyronus Hanma Starfield
Title: Pig
Age: 23
Plane: Material
Location: Fluttershy's cottage/Ponyville
Time: 5:57 A.M.

Dean's eyes snapped open as his body shot up, before he could do so much as speak pain shot out from his entire body.

Quickly hugging his two arms he forced himself to stay silent, not a murmur left his mouth as seconds passed in agony.

Pressure, not unlike that of his dream stubbornly stayed in his arms, if he had to compare it to something he would say it felt like being crushed between two hydraulic presses.

Looking down he saw red marks in the form of hands slowly forming on his arms.

Thump!*

His heart almost jumped out of his chest, the mark, it was concrete proof, the Ogre wasn't lying.

But… he already knew that didn't he? That man sees no value in him besides a fun toy to play with in the future, a delicious meal he is preparing.

Why would he bother lying to something so insignificant?

He remembers it.

At the end of that fight against Yuujirou, after he woke up, even while enraged he felt a burning sensation on his chest.

At the time he thought it was the pain of the wound the pony -Rainbow Dash- had given him.

Now he knows better.

He knew it even after he returned from death.

Those who achieve Mind over Matter risk everything to gain power.

Whether they want it or not.

Drip*

A drop of blood suddenly fell on his hand, a second later, pain started to radiate throughout his body once again.

Crack!

Bones fractured as his skin tore itself open to invisible blades, blood fell and he could do nothing but watch as his body tore itself apart.

Throughout the pain, he refused to do as much as twitch, screaming while falling to his presumed death was humiliating enough.

Screaming out in pain, even more so.

Even then, his mind did not stop working, his previous injury was more likely than not instantaneous in its physical reflection.

So why were these ones not?

Suddenly, it came to him.

'Delayed reaction?!'

Yes, it made somewhat of a sense, if the ogre crushed his brain he would die instantly regardless of whether he could heal or not.

Of course, overlapping his soul into his body after the brain healed could work, but neither he nor the Ogre could know for sure without testing it.

Something both would try to do without hesitation.

But if the wounds aren't instantaneous for one reason or another dying in a single attack would be significantly harder if he had a way to heal.

Or maybe, no, that man must surely have found a way to delay it artificially, meaning…

'He can kill me any time he wants.'

Veins popped up in his head as the implications fully settled in his mind, anger flooded his body as the idea that he only lived because someone else allowed it planted itself in his mind.

'Thatdamn fucker.’

Feeling the pain in his arms increase as his muscles contracted he forcibly calmed himself.

At the moment, anger is pointless, he can't punch anything to solve this problem, yet.

But… yes, what difference did it make in the end?

Even if Yuujirou wasn't there, there's still the Celestial.

The sun could very well send death beams at any moment towards him for all he knows, or slam itself on the planet to kill him.

'...nah.'

He's not quite that important at the moment, the second possibility will only become worrying after some years, for now, only the first should worry him.

He sighed.

"The weak only live by the mercy of the strong, is that what you are trying to tell me, Ogre?"

His face morphed into a smile.

That man… didn't need to show it to him.

He learned that already some time ago.

"Heh~ So be it, I'll give this favor back to you one day."

Previously, he only wanted to be stronger, to be his ideal self, to reach his maximum potential and stand equal to those men, but now?

Now he had a solid objective.

A true ambition that goes beyond just him.

What he wants?

Simple...

To fight the strongest creature on earth, and kill it with his bare hands.

Yuujirou Hanma will fall by the hands of his so-called 'Meal'.

And contrary to that father and son fight, he'll make sure only one of them leaves alive.

Shaking his head he went to leave the sofa, only to sense something falling from his leg.

Looking down curiously he saw a small, yellow blanket.

He… didn't go to sleep with that thing, did he?

No, he doesn't remember taking it with him while he got to sleep.

Crouching he took the blanket and folded it slowly, contrary to the medics who took care of him, the adorable pegasus, Fluttershy, had no obligation to do so.

'Even her name is adorable, a little ridiculous though.'

Not that he will mock an entire culture just for being different.

She took him in simply because she chose to, out of kindness in fact, and he will not be ungrateful.

He has no obligation to do anything, but he is no parasite.

He lived in the house of his grandparents for some time before, and he never liked how he couldn't contribute much to them.

This will not be the case here, he will make sure of it.

Folding the blanket he took care not to bleed onto it, seconds later, with great care he put it above the sofa and turned to the kitchen.

'Fluttershy's home is remarkably small for a human.'

Luckily he is somewhat of a midget.

Suddenly he heard the sound of hooves hitting wood.

'Mmmn, so we do wake up around the same time.'

Clop*

Clop*

Clop*

Coming down the stairs with a sleepy expression Fluttershy, with her eyes slightly closed, looked at him with a smile.

"Good morning StaaAAAR!."

Only for her eyes to widen in shock and her voice to grow several pitches higher as she saw the state of his body.

Small cuts formed all over his face, arms, and legs, his nose kept bleeding, the giant red hand marks on his hand and face grew several times redder.

Drip*

As if the visage wasn't bad enough, blood started to fall through his eyebrow as a small crack formed on his forehead.

'Ah yes.'

The Ogre flickered his forehead, didn't he?

And now his back is hurting.

With a furious face completely uncharacteristic of herself Fluttershy galloped at full speed toward the huma while giving him a rather… uncomfortable look.

Quite honestly the worried, angry, disappointed, and determined mix of expressions in that single look made him feel strangely bad.

And he didn't even do anything in the first place!

Stopping in front of him the mare forcibly pushed his hands down, almost bringing his entire body together with them.

Once again he noted how strong a pony was compared to their size.

‘But then again they do walk on four legs.’

"Dean Tyronus Starfield, what did you do to yourself mister?!"

She shouted in a strange mix of loud, disappointed, paradoxically quiet, and sad tone of voice.

Maybe it is because she is a small pony, maybe because she is cute, or even how worried she looked, but for the first time in years he felt bad about how his actions affected another person.

'Pony.'

He would do it again of course, well… had he done something that resulted in these wounds that is, he would feel bad for worrying the cute pegasus but he'd do it again.

Regardless of what they spoke yesterday, she is still largely a stranger.

For some reason he doesn't think the mare thinks the same.

He might feel bad, but he'll never regret acting on his beliefs.

Still… the expression on the mare's face made him ponder.

If, IF his actions affected another creature he wouldn't be completely apathetic.

Not because they got harmed, planets above, no, he practically lost his empathy for strangers, but because they didn't take the risk.

How to explain it… if Fluttershy got injured because of a fight of his he'd be angry at his enemy solely because the one who took the risk was himself.

It was his fight, his risk, his life on the line, not a bystander's.

He… holds himself accountable for the consequences of his actions, simply because he refuses to put the blame on others again.

It could be described as a sense of individual responsibility, a belief that one, not only himself, should take ownership of the risks they take with their actions and not run from them.

If he's involved in a situation and something goes wrong because of his actions, he believes wholeheartedly that the only one who should bear the consequences is him.

Even if there are external factors, even if no one would say the fault is solely his own, he'd still hold himself responsible.

Responsibility and self-reliance are two things he absolutely refuses to not adhere to.

Even if he had no hope of doing anything against it, he fully knows his actions are his own, he has the obligation to not push the consequences to someone else.

For example.

If Fluttershy actually tried to fight and got harmed -Even if for him- no matter how cute the mare is, he wouldn't truly care.

Those who wish to kill must be prepared to be killed in return after all.

If the decision to attack was hers, independently of the reason he will not act to protect her, actions have consequences, and blood is a better teacher than most in these cases.

Those afraid of seeing it, shouldn't bother leaving their homes.

A creature without will is already dead after all.

Those who take the path of a fighter and those who wish to be more than they are, have to always be ready to die at a moment's notice for their ambitions.

That's why they are selfish, all that matters is their own wishes after all.

Having the strength to impose them on others and little reason to acknowledge creatures completely inconsequential to their own lives those who achieve Mind over Matter are incredibly selfish.

He is no exception.

Not that he doesn't have self-control, contrary to Yuujirou he can control his impulses, and not because he is afraid of the consequences, worlds above no.

If he wants to do something he will, whether this results in someone trying to shoot at him or an entire country declaring him an enemy of the state matters little.

No, he controls himself simply because he is not a slave to himself.

The soul has no lust, wish, or greed for anything besides will after all.

If weaklings wish to roll in the mud and shit, too afraid to feel even a lick of pain instead of trying to escape he'd let them.

Killing them would be a mercy but… he had none to give to those filth.

'Wait…'

His thoughts deranged again.

Clearing his head he went back to his previous train of thought.

It was weird even for him to think it but… Dean Tyronus Starfield is a responsible man.

With some difficulty, he pushed his hands away from Fluttershy's hooves.

Her telekinetic hold is not weak, at all.

"I did nothing to myself mare, I was caught by surprise by an attack, nothing more."

She glared at him with her angry/worried eyes even more, clearly not believing him even a bit.

Briefly, he thought to say sorry, only to squash the idea from his mind a second later.

Although… maybe he spoke a little too harshly, the mare certainly didn't deserve it, even if misguided she only wished to take care of him.

Explaining his situation should make her leave him alone.

"Did the pony medics not tell you what happened to me?"

Tilting her head to the side in confusion as one of her eyebrows lowered she began to think

Her anger momentarily left her as she pondered the question, seconds passed as she started to become truly confused at her beneficiary's situation.

All they told her was that a creature needed help after being hospitalized by a pony in an accident.

They told her she was specifically chosen not only because she was a local but also because her talent would be instrumental in talking to him.

Translation spells were good but by their very nature they needed to be invasive for the translation to be perfect, her talent had no such defect.

Her cutie mark would never harm anycreature after all, it simply allowed her to understand them, and be understood, even if they don't have the intelligence for it.

There are limits of course, but she never found them, more so for lack of experimentation than anything.

Thinking back she thought he was a foreigner, something quickly proven wrong as after he woke up he revealed to be from another planet entirely.

She didn't truly care for the revelation quite honestly, a creature needed help, and so she would step up to the role! Alien or not everycreature needed to be shown a little kindness.

Her talent truly was perfect for this situation.

It would let her teach him their language, and although he wasn't an unintelligent animal she had vast experience in dealing with other creatures.

They also cited how she was the ideal Pony to introduce him to their culture due to being 'gentle' which… she somewhat agreed.

Taking care of animals, big and small really showed her how kindness could go a long way, kindness and patience.

Although…

She almost scratched the back of her head in embarrassment as she remembered how she screamed at him earlier.

The shame alone almost made her want to hide behind her wing.

It's just… she was so angry at the idea any creature would try to do that to themselves.

She… had problems when she was a filly, problems of the bullying kind that, at least according to her Ponytrist, brought her self-confidence to an all low.

She is… better now, but at the time she tried to dismiss those worries.

That is… until her family showed her what happened to ponies that didn't take care of their hearts.

Up until that point It had never passed through her mind, the possibility of hating herself so much she started to hurt herself.

Her family's worries that she was heading in that direction were enough for her to accept help, by Celestia even her younger brother was worried about her!

And he did little else besides play his games at the time.

So… she got a little too emotional, and although the anger didn't pass completely she is hoping, very, very strongly that Star didn't do what she thought he did.

But going back to her thoughts.

The government would then give her money to take care of Star's needs for some months before he found something to do.

Although they did say some weird things, for example, a pony named Hammerstrike would be nearby just in case something happened.

At the time she thought they wanted to make sure nopony bothered him too much but now she's asking herself whether or not they meant to observe Star himself and not the ponies around him.

As the pegasus tried to solve the puzzle Dean simply looked at her thoughtful form.

'Those eyes are quite expressive, maybe that's why they are bigger?'

Looking at the contemplative look on the pegasus face he sighed, and sat on the sofa.

He would have to live with the mare for who knows how long, possibly trying to explain why a corpse was in her house to the authorities tomorrow, or hiding why his body kept being torn apart each night would be tiring.

That's without considering her olfaction, earth ponies are better than humans in that aspect, this alien pony pegasi shouldn't be much different… probably.

Ignoring the pony's state he continued to speak, time, is not something he has the privilege to waste now.

"Before arriving on your planet, 2 days in fact I stole a vial of blood from the strongest creature on my planet, Yuujirou Hanma."

Telling the history did not bother him, secrets and lies are things only those, too afraid of the consequences of their lives and actions use.

Even if the entire world hates him for it, Dean Tyronus Starfield will not be known as a liar, neither to the world nor himself.

"That man alone could defeat countries with his bare fists, shatter them too, no one could defeat him, and as far as I know, no one ever did."

If they found his weaknesses through his words? Good, he'd let them use and abuse it, whatever he dies or surpasses those annoyances will be entirely up to him.

A diamond cannot be formed without pressure after all.

"He is the… peak, the prime of humanity."

Stress testing his resolve will be much better than lifting some weight, he is training to increase his will, not his muscles.

"And a shard of him is inside me."

Besides.

What doesn't kill him only makes him stronger.

"That wave of killing intent you most likely felt 8 days ago was his fault, his blood possesses a shard of his soul, and that same shard wanted me dead, it hoped to provoke an animal into attacking and killing me by releasing his aura, he got a pony instead."

Fluttershy hopped on the sofa and sat comfortably, even while looking up at him her eyes lost focus as he spoke.

He recognized a flashback when he saw one, he couldn't imagine having those visions to be anything else but traumatic.

At least for ordinary people, ponies… shouldn't be that different.

"When Rainbow Dash hit me she broke that vial of blood, her punch was strong, it was a miracle I didn't die instantly, perhaps that vial saved me, no, saving isn't the right word, more like… it wanted to kill me itself."

"The punch ripped my skin and muscles apart, my bones bent inward and broke, some shards pierced my heart, and the blood, well, it splatted itself directly on my heart."

The mare's eyes widened as she put her hooves on her mouth to try to stop a gasp.

"Ammph!"

Succeeding somewhat.

"I don't know what happened next, my mind became hasty after that, I could only mostly feel pain to be honest but…"

"When I opened my eyes, instead of hell I found myself in a weird, white space, before I could think or even do anything a fist hit my head, and splattered my skull to the ground."

He looked at the Mare's disbelieving eyes and smiled like a fool who knew something she didn't.

"I didn't know at the time but that place was… a spiritual realm of sorts, more specifically the place where my mind laid, the body I had there wasn't flesh and blood, it was my soul, and because of it, he couldn't kill me."

"I died… 279 times before that, golden thing dragged me out, to steal my body Yuujirou Hanma needed to make my soul desist."

He glanced at the pony

"I don't know about your pony ones but human souls can't be erased unless they truly give up, or are changed to such a point they are no longer themselv-."

Something poked his hand, interrupting his history, instinctively he looked down.

"Mmmm"

Seeing his arm he hummed and lifted the limb toward his face, blood dripped, his eyes stood frozen in apathy as he watched the cuts form.

He expected the wounds to stop by now, but then again, who knows how much the ogre can delay them?

It was, somewhat incredible, to see his skin be cut open by a non-existent blade, even more so to feel the same pain as the time he was falling.

Smelling the blood the mare's eyes regained focus, a moment later she turned to face him.

"eep!"

Seeing cuts spontaneously form in his arm she screamed and immediately ran towards the stairs in a mad dash.

Tot tot tot tot tot

Lifting his eyebrow he watched as the mare quickly went up to the second floor, and just as quickly come down with both a box of band-aids and a plastic bottle.

Jumping to his side she opened the box, rolled the plastic bottle, threw the… liquid on the band-aid, and went on to warp the entire thing on his arm, well, the one without the band-aid that is.

It burned somewhat, but the pain receded.

His bones still hurt though.

'Magic? Or simple medicine?'

Acting as if nothing happened he continued his history.

"And that man couldn't do the latter, so he opted to kill me, again, again and again, until I gave up."

Putting his hand on the pegasus' head he smiled, recalling those events made his heart race with excitement.

"But. I. Didn't."

He laughed.

"Ha! Oh, at the beginning I did, after each death, I came back weaker and weaker, and soon enough I'd lose my sense of self completely, but!"

He paused as the mare finally ended with his arm and went to his legs.

Maybe someone else would think the pegasi was disinterested in his history.

Not him.

Her raised ear, lazily pointed at him, told him enough of how much she really listened to his words.

'Adorable.'

"It wasn't over quite yet, many tries later, on a specific death, having the certainty that I would die no matter what I did, and not remembering any of the previous times I did something different, I punched back."

"Of course, it did nothing against the Ogre, oh, that's his title, an ogre is a Japanese Oni, a demon, but don't be mistaken that man is, surprisingly enough a human like me, just… the best, and worst of us."

Enveloping the band-aid on the bloody leg her ears twitched as she heard Star's history.

It… made things clearer to her.

When that thing happened she felt it too, that monster released so much malice in a single blast that she couldn't even move.

Oh, she understands it, it was incredibly weak and it only allowed her to feel it from less intelligent animals but her cutie mark transformed her into somewhat of an empath.

'Well, not transform, more like enhance.'

She felt how animals wanted to kill, but never out of maliciousness, they needed to kill other creatures only in order to survive after all, there was no inherent evil in the action.

She still didn't like it however.

That's why she didn't like releasing her animals back into the forest.

But she couldn't lock them up.

So, she made it so they didn't want to leave.

Food, even if vegetarian could be done in wonderful ways so even carnivorous creatures loved them, substitutes for specific dietary requirements weren't really hard to get with her connections in Equestria's unified society of creature preservation.

No, wait, her thoughts deranged a little too much, going back.

Where was she again? Oh yes, killing intent.

She felt it before, never directed at her but she did feel it, but… contrary to that monster their emotions had a drive to it, they wanted to kill to eat, nothing else.

The… thing, however, wanted to kill simply because it felt like it.

There was no reason, no motive, no justification, it just… felt like it, and so it did, with a malice so immense nothing she had ever seen before could compare to it.

And she saw some truly twisted creatures while visiting the creature preservation society.

How a creature was capable of feeling so much bloodlust she will never know, but…

'That's the thing, right? It wasn't a creature, it was a monster.'

Even so much further away and with the blessing of not being forced to see those visions she still stood frozen on the ground, hyperventilating to the point she thought she would die.

Every breath hurt, every twitch made her feel like she had fallen 100 meters up.

Every fiber of her muscles hurt like somepony had taken a baseball bat and decided to use her as a pinata.

Had it not been for the panicked cries of her critters she would not have found the strength to leave the ground and run with them.

Later on, she discovered how lucky she actually was, besides sweet apple acres her cottage was the farthest from the blast, weakening it considerably.

That alone was the only reason nocreature from her house died that day.

She was relieved when everything suddenly ended, she was shaken but… happy that everything was over.

The next days were hard but slowly everything went back to normal, the guard presence in the village only helped it further.

'Now, only if they'd stay...' She thought bitterly

And now she found out that that thing, the one who terrorized her entire village is inside her newest friend.

Tormenting him, torturing him, playing with him.

And she can't do anything about it.

Imponent rage, she had felt it before, many, many times, wanting to do something, accomplish something, but not being able to.

Be it because of her mind or body, she remembered hating the way she was born, wishing that she had been an earth pony.

Those thoughts did go away but now, feeling the same thing she did back then, it… It stung more than any time before it.

Now it's not only herself she can't help, but somehuman in need of aid.

She doesn't know what to do, Princess Cestia had visited all those days ago, and if she couldn't remove that monster from her friend, then who could?

Certainly not her, certainly not Fluttershy of all ponies, no, all she could do was watch and pray as that monster kept, killing, killing, and Killing her friend whenever it felt like it!

Tears threatened to form in her eyes, she held them back the best she could.

'For Star's sake.'

The human stallion couldn't depend on a weak mare, after all, no colt could.

She has a feeling about where this conversation is going and honestly… she'd prefer if Star had cut himself instead of what she is thinking being true.

It would be horrible, and she felt bad just by wishing it but… it would be a thousand times better than the other option.

A determined face slowly formed as she nodded with a serious expression, quickly turning her head from Star she wiped the tears away.

Climbing the back of the sofa she put the plant solution on the band-aid and warped it on his head.

Even if she couldn't do much she'd try to help him at least a little bit and… she knew some ponies, even some zebras that could help her.

She didn't need to do it alone but… if the Princess didn't talk with her about it then she must have wanted to keep everything a secret.

That… complicated things.

From what she could gather, that mean sta- man -Human stallions are called men- was a villain and a bully, two things she hated.

Well not hated, just disliked really, really much

To kill a creature, not only that but to kill his soul? Calling that thing a demon is unfortunately not inaccurate.

Something inside her trembled.

Even worse, that monster is still in there, inside him, waiting to pounce.

No.

She looked at the blood-stained band-aids, the smell wasn't strong but… it was just as horrible.

It had already done it, hadn't it?

Her expression fell as she finally tied the band-aid around his head.

What can a pegasus like her do? Besides hope for the best that is.

She isn't a mage, nor particularly smart, she doesn't have powerful magical artifacts, tomes, or even basic knowledge of harmonic principles.

Those are things others have.

Others better than her that is.

Once again… she has to depend on others…

'no!'

She puffed her chest, if she had become somepony her critters could rely on she can surely become somepony a human can rely on too!

With a resolute expression, she went on with her task.

Seeing the complicated look on the alien pegasus face Dean shook his head, and opted to continue.

"Soon enough he killed me again, but… the next time I came back I didn't grow weaker, and once again I punched him back."

"This… kept happening for hundreds of deaths more, each time I came back I did so tougher, but still… I remembered nothing, no, my memories only came to me yesterday."

"But… that's the thing, at the time I only punched back because I thought it would be far too pathetic to die without doing it, but then, on death 278, or was it 277? I did something different, I punched that man with the sole intent to win."

His voice deepened.

"I wanted him dead, it didn't matter whether it was impossible, if I was weak, or even if the very idea was ridiculous, I punched that man solely with the intent to win, to kill him."

"And because of that, I achieved something I had only fantasized of, no, it is more precise to say I had not even dreamed of it happening."

He smiled, genuinely smiled, not something he did much in the past, but something he noticed he kept doing much more frequently these past days.

He couldn't help it, his achievement, even if minuscule, made him extremely happy.

He scoffed mentally.

'Then again, an ant commemorates after finding a drop of sugar.'

"Mind over matter, the power all humans possess, through superhuman amounts of will, that is to say, emotion and determination beyond what the brain can ever hope to achieve, a human can make a deeper connection to their souls and draw power from it."

"Will is the fuel the soul uses to enhance the body beyond possibility and logic, hence the name, Mind Over Matter, with will alone a human can ignore their limits, that now are solely directed by their own minds."

The mare sat on his side of the couch, her eyes turning into worried ones as her wings ruffled, for a moment he thought she would try to touch him with them, after a second however he dismissed the idea.

The mare was probably just agitated.

'Either she is very sensitive, or this place is exceedingly peaceful, maybe a joke would relax her a little? Didn't do those for a while.'

"That also means any wound on one's soul, at least for those that achieved M.O.M..."

"Hehehe~"

The diminutive pegasus laughed, managing to take a grin out of him too.

"...Will reflect on their bodies."

The mare's laughter suddenly stopped.

"Yes… before I woke up I was brought to that white space again, he spoke to me and, well the technicalities don't matter all you have to understand is that he can force me to see and feel things that aren't real, even if I know they aren't I am, not strong enough to resist his 'illusion'."

He sighed, more in annoyance at his inability to fight back than anything else.

"An entire forest sprouted from my mindscape, a tree caught me and pushed me to the air, I fell and the branches cut my skin, the rest is his fault."

"I do not cut myself for no reason Fluttershy, do not assume me to be this pathetic next time, well…"

He sighed in exasperation.

"If there is a next time."

And spoke as if he was commenting about the weather.

Dean went quiet and sat fully with his back on the couch, all the while the pegasus stood motionless beside him.

He hoped the explanation would make the mare stop bothering him, but he still had to clarify some things before he was done.

The house is hers after all, and he would prefer not to act like a pig while inside it.

As he learned in Japan, politeness goes a long way.

Still looking forward, he spoke slowly and briefly, all he wanted was to learn more about this planet and train to gain a better form, he disliked talking, wasting time, or doing small talk

He was always a cur man, and that did not change even now.

"You don't need to worry about the furniture, I will clean the blood every day, if this is not acceptable either way I can sleep outside of your cottage on the gras-"

He flinched as a sudden feeling of being poked assaulted his side.

"eep!"

Forcing his hand to stop halfway he held the reflex of punching the thing back and brought his arm to his side again.

Looking down he saw a not-quite-small yellow wing extending halfway between him and Fluttershy, for one second his mind crashed, and then, he remembered the pony was a pegasus.

The mare on the other hand froze at the human's reaction, she managed to hold the urge to flinch as his fist snapped toward her then, but… now she didn't know what to do.

Seconds passed as the overbearing silence weighed heavily on her back, her widened eyes stared intensely at the human as he looked at his arm, had she… done something wrong?

She doesn't think so but… the situation reminded her of something that happened with her before.

Memories came to her mind of a time when her mother tried to hug her.

It was daytime, she had just got back from flight school, she remembered vividly how the feeling of her mother's feathers touching her side made her jump away like a scared cat.

At the time even she didn't understand why she reacted like that, but now… now she knows better.

She was taught better.

Yes, she isn't the one that did something wrong.

Without noticing her face slowly changed from a surprised to determined expression, very slowly and carefully she extended her wing once more, all the while observing the human's form.

Sometimes… all somepony -human- needs is a friend.

And she Can be just that.

Tyronus stood frozen.

He… couldn't quite find the answer to what to do.

The sensation of being poked alerted him more than anything, he wasn't afraid, or even uncomfortable just… surprised, maybe his mind is more alert due to all the fights he had.

Reacting like this is… dangerous for those around him, and he has no wish to punch anyone without reason.

Maybe… maybe he should rest a little.

'No.'

The idea was shot down as soon as it was brought up.

The very thought was ridiculous, he felt ridiculous just for thinking it.

Either he trains, or he dies, there's no alternative to that fact, he is very well aware of his situation.

Hell, sleeping isn't an option, he will just keep being killed in his mindscape, relaxing in any meaningful way is not possible for him.

Hopeless is a word many would use to describe it, forced to choose between death and torture, unable to rest for even a second.

For him, however, his situation felt… ideal.

He quite liked it actually.

Pain meant progress, the more of it he passed through the more he would advance.

This alone was enough to put a smile on his face.

He is not particularly worried about dying, he is however worried about stagnating.

The very state of no longer evolving is far worse than anything Yuujirou Hanma and the Celestial could ever do to him.

One thing is certain however, independently of what he does.

He will not go back to that hell.

The path of a fighter ends only in death, and for those strong enough, the journey doesn't have an end.

They move forward no matter what, that's what it means to be a true fighter, and that's what he decided to be, who he decided to be.

And here he is, relapsing on that damn old mindset that brought nothing but misery.

It alone was enough to infuriate him.

Why did he even think of relaxing in the first place?! He is on an alien planet, without basic knowledge of its inhabitants, culture, creatures, or even power levels!

Of course he is tense! Of course he is alert! Lowering his guard would be nothing short of suicide for fucks sake!

He understands it, he has no wish to change it, cute or not, small or not, these ponies can be the death of him if he isn't careful.

One almost was, what impedes the other on his side from being the same?

Trust? What value did that trash have? without facts and certainties, nothing can be trusted upon, nothing… besides himself that is.

Yes, he is in the right state, alert, cautious, and curious, it has its disadvantages of course but nothing in his world is perfect.

Perfection is an ideal, nothing more.

He won't care if his views on the potential dangers of this planet are correct, to be honest, he'd go as far as to say he'd be happy.

More enemies really only mean more stepping stones, only those filth rolling in the mud would be afraid of challenges, not him.

'He is not them, he is not them, heisnothemheisnothemheisnothemanymore.'

It's just… if he had to choose a way to die, it would be in a fight, punching back, taking blood out of his opponent, and not stabbed in the back by a not-so-little pony.

The pony was… kind, yes, and he didn't believe she would attack him, nor could he feel any malice for that matter but…

It weirded him out, her actions, words, and gestures… made him think something wasn't quite right.

The pony was acting far too familiar with someone she only met a day ago and didn't talk with properly for even 4 hours.

Neither did he think his history was particularly disturbing or shocking enough to warrant such a reaction.

Maybe if he had gotten into the details but, he didn't.

His voice was calm, perhaps somewhat excited while speaking but… he felt no angst nor did he show any while retelling the history.

He showed no distress and gave no indication of needing or wanting help.

He just wanted to explain his situation to her for her to stop bothering him.

He is fine.

So why on the seven hells is this pony trying to hug him?

His mind worked on overdrive as he tried to discern the thoughts of the alien creature, a task he knew full well he was not prepared for.

Many variables he did not have enough knowledge of existed, culture, body language, bio-

Yellow feathers slowly and gently enveloped his back.

Reacting on instinct he jumped out of the sofa and quickly changed places to sit on the chair in front of him.

It all happened in one second.

He stared at the Pony with confusion.

She stared back with shocked eyes.

Seconds passed.

The silence became overbearing.

Suddenly, with a cautious expression the pony slowly folded her wing back, taking care not to move rapidly she opened her mouth and spoke in a gentle tone.

"You need help."
"I need nothing."

The snapping answer came back instantly.

The pegasus held a flinch back, but still held firm.

"Sta-"

He interrupted her.

"Not from you, your race, or your government."

His anger rose.

"You are the third goddamn pony who does that, putting your muzzle where it doesn't concern you."

He tried to control it, to no success.

"That… golden fuck tried to stop my fight against him and for it, I punched it with all my strength, to teach it to mind its own business."

His breathing deepened as his heat started to beat rapidly.

"Don't make me do the same to you."

Fluttershy's eyes sharpened, she felt no fear for the human, nor anger just… concern.

Why… why was he so angry for being offered help?

A tingle of sadness formed on her chest, what had they done to him?

Dean tried to calm himself down, only to still as he observed the pitying look on the pegasus' face.

Veins popped out of his neck as his anger increased unreasonably, that look, he didn't know why but… it made him want to break that damn pony's face.

Clenching his fist he held himself back from lunging at the mare, even now he realized how irrational his anger was.

He will not act like an animal.

'Calm down, calm down, calmdowncalmdowncal-'

"Starfiel, liste-"

His anger almost bursted out at the pony's gall.

To mock him like this, and have the courage to raise her tone as if she were talking to a child.

Does this damn animal want to die?

"That fucking horse with a rainbow waving mane killed my Self and I. Came. Back, I don't need, or want your help pony."

Veins popped out of his head as his muscles tensed.

He will kill something if he doesn't scream.

What did that monster do to him?

He… didn't understand it.

And so, he did.

"This is my fight! Even before that blue mare hit me I had already decided to put that man's blood inside me! I will deal with the consequences of my actions mare! Don't get in my way, got it?! I will beat that man! ME, alone!"

His throat started to burn.

Crack!

The chair's arm broke as he kept gripping with more strength.

His hair started to float as even more anger flooded into him, this wasn't working, he had to keep screaming or the ponies would find a corpse in this house.

No, only a part of him didn't understand it.

"I chose to do this, whether or not my plans didn't go perfectly is irrelevant, I would have fought against that man regardless."

The pegasus stood quiet, looking at the human's form with a frown. The man had left the cracked chair and unconsciously started to walk in circles, sometimes looking at her, sometimes looking at nothing.

Quite frankly… it felt like he was talking to himself more than her.

And she didn't like it one bit.

"Don't FUCKING pity me just because you presume I am suffering you damn pony! I am not a child! I do not need your help."

The rest did.

"No matter how many times I have to die, no matter if my soul is destroyed, or even if this ridiculous body is torn apart tomorrow and I die a slow and painful death I Will Win!"

He started to become more erratic.

"THIS PAIN IS MINE, MINE AND NO ONE ELSE'S! THEY ARE THE RESULT OF MY CHOICES, MINE! I WILL SUFFER THEM ALL YOU HEAR ME?!"

The why he was so angry at the very idea of getting help.

"I, me, Dean Tyronus Starfield, not Fluttershy, not Rainbow Dash, not whatever ridiculous other name your ponies have!"

It was simple really.

"ME! I can handle this pain, 279 times Mare, I died 279 times at the hands of Yuujirou Hanma! I had my limbs ripped out, my stomach used to strangle me, my arm used to beat me to death, I was ripped in two, my head was used as a soccer ball, MY ENTIRE BODY CRUSHED AS IF IT WAS THIN METAL IN A HYDRAULIC PRESS!"

"I cried, screamed but never NEVER HAVE I EVER BEGGED FOR MY LIFE OR FOR HELP, I kept coming back!"

"You think I need help?! ME?! Look at yourself in the mirror first you pathetic creature and realize the reflection you see Isn't me! I can beat him, alone, I know I can."

He breathed slowly as the air left his lungs, his heart hurt, he refused to hold his chest.

"… I. Know. I. Can."

It is his fight, and he won't allow some random fucker to put their muzzles where it doesn't belong, there's nothing more to it.

"I will."

But… even then, he had to ask himself.

"And you will not ruin this for me."

Was he always this short-tempered?

Sighing he felt all his anger leave him this… well, he discovered that even now he still has triggers outside of simple fighting.

Help?

Now that he doesn't want any, someone actually offers it.

He scoffed.

'How typical of my luck, always attracting the most annoying of people.'

Taking one last look at the pony's expression he almost scoffed again.

'Ridiculous, although…'

Even in the midst of his dwindling rage a tingle of regret formed in his chest.

He held back a sigh as his heart started to slow down.

The pony didn't deserve this… she didn't deserve him.

… maybe leaving would be better, he can handle sleeping on the ground.

It won't be the first time anyway.

"I'll go… take some air, we will not speak of this again, kick me out if you want, I won't lower myself to please anyone mare."

Tyronus turned and headed to the door.

There's a reason he never had any friends in the past.

Him.

Looking at the human's back a feeling she hadn't quite felt in years enveloped her body.

Courage.

After eight years Fluttershy finally felt courage properly.

Using all the air in her lungs she spoke with the most serious tone she could muster.

"No!."

The pony puffed her chest and spread her wings while looking fiercely at the human's back, this time… this time she won't run away.

Slowly, the human turned around, with a confused and challenging look on his face, he looked at the yellow pony's form.

Something… felt different.

"What?"

The air had changed.

She did not back down.

"I said no."

Jumping out of the couch she slowly trotted towards the human.

"I am going to help you mister, maybe not by bucking that meanie inside you, maybe not by giving you some secret magic tome, or even exorcizing that thing, but hear me and hear me well, Dean Tyronus Starfield I. Will. Help. You."

She glared intensely at the human's eyes, her pupils glowing for but a second.

The man on the other hand only got angrier.

"How many times I will have to repeat myself you stupid pony I. Do. Not. Need. Your. Help! Nor do I want it, put this into your head!"

"You. Are. Not. Wanted!"

Jumping the mare beat her wings and stayed at head height with the human, pushing her face forward she pressed her nose on his and glared even harder.

Just as he did, she didn't back down even as he glared back.

"Now, hear me here mister, I don't care if you want my help or not, I will help you, because that's what I want to do."

Fluttershy understood colts, or at least what her mother taught her about them.

Once those fools set themselves on something there's no arguing with them, no, what she was taught to do was push back just as hard.

To put her hoof down and say no.

She thought herself incapable of doing it, for years she couldn't even negate her animal friends spoiling them every chance she got.

But now… she understood.

No, it is right to say she understood what it meant to have courage for her friends the day that monster came near Ponyville.

But, if before she fought to run together with her critters, to not leave one friend behind, now she stood her ground to fight against a demon.

She knows how scary that thing is, the strongest creature on Star's planet? That demon was the same as Princess Celestia! just… Evil.

Yes, she understands what she is standing against, and she had to force her body not to tremble at the thought, nonetheless, she stood her ground and refused not to help a friend in need.

“Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye, Ouch!”

Shaking her head the pony glared at Star, who looked at her confusedly.

“There I pinkie promised, you know what this means mister?”

Even if they didn't want her to.

Sometimes, somehuman needs an outside perspective, she sure did, and he sure does now.

“It means there's nothing you can do to stop me now, got it?!"

Dean stood quiet, even while confused he held the pegasus stare for some seconds and then scoffed.

"Do what you want woman, just don't get in my way."

She didn't quite understand what the word woman meant but even then Fluttershy smiled and clopped her hooves in happiness.

"Good, now! It is already 6:22 and we should have already eaten breakfast."

Grasping the human's hands she flew toward her kitchen with a smile on her face.

The human just looked at her back with a confused face.

What was there to be happy about anyway?
.
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Name: Fluttershy
Title: Animal Caretaker
Age: 15
Plane: Material
Location: Fluttershy's cottage/Equestria
Time: 6:30
Date: Ponysesho-day - 9th - Hayprance

Fluttershy looked at the human sitting in front of her, it was a strange image, a fun and new one that is.

She didn't know why but watching as the man held the fork with his ~~grabbers~~ fingers while eating the salad and egg she had prepared made her unexplainably giggly.

Everything was so… new, and exciting!

And she has a friend now -One who is actually as smart as a pony- how amazing is that!

"So… is it good?"

She asked awkwardly, still somewhat embarrassed by the way she acted previously, she doesn't regret it but… just thinking of it made her want to hide below her covers.

Being that… assertive was something new, and embarrassing, but she didn't dislike it.

The human sighed, putting his fork on the bow he looked at the pegasus with a deadpan stare.

"No, it tastes like grass, I feel like I'm eating paper and the only way this sack of trash becomes mildly tolerable without me puking is when I eat it together with the egg."

Brutal Honesty, not a 'flaw' he had the wish to ever 'fix', for him, if someone can't handle words they shouldn't have left their cribs in the first place.

"That somehow is sweet."

The pegasus ears dropped.

"Oh…" She said in a meek tone.

Seeing the lowered ears Dean's heartbeat quickened, if she actually whined he'd most likely hug her out of reflex alone.

He loves dogs damn it.

And this pony was similar enough.

His expression softened, bullying those weaker than him isn't truly something he finds enjoyable, well, not that he has enough experience in the field, but he still thinks it's true.

The pegasus's eyes moved down.

He sighed.

He'll start feeling bad if this continues any longer.

"That said."

Her ears went up.

"It is understandable, I'm happy enough your food didn't kill me outright but I do believe it is best if I go back to the hospital for some tests later on.”

“Unfortunately the Lettuce, tomatoes, and egg you made still won't give me energy for the day."

"And since your race is somewhat similar to one I have on my planet I can't go around asking for meat, purely on the assumption that there can be more creatures similar to mine in your world, ones that can talk."

His eyebrow raised at the pegasus.

"There are other races as smart as Ponies in this world right?"

The pony nodded with a smile.

"Ah, so before I am able to hunt for my own food I will have to ask some things of you if that is not a problem, rest assured when I am able to I will pay you back."

She nodded with another smile, one… lesser than before.

'Sensitive to predators then? Somewhat expected of herbivores.'

He did the same, he had no obligation to but his mind alone would make him feel indebted to the Pegasus, and favors are not something he will own without explicitly stating so.

Saying he will pay her back is the same as stating he will owe her nothing besides the money wasted on him.

Dialogues between intelligent creatures have little need to be explicit, hints and insinuations are more than enough for those with more than 5 brain cells.

"Oh, you don't need to worry about bits, Equestrian's Department of Immigrants gave me enough for you to live here for some months without any drain on my savings."

And now he doesn't care anymore.

The government of any world can go to hell for all he cares.

The pegasus put her hoof on her chin in a thoughtful manner as the human almost spat at the mention of her country's governing body.

"Well, you are not exactly the definition of an immigrant but you did say you didn't plan on going back to your world in the meantime."

Her eyes widened as she remembered something.

"Oh! I almost forgot, there will be a time, during this year to be exact, when they will be screening you, at the end of it they will pass on to give you a, how to say it… score."

His interest peaked at the brief explanation, good or not knowing how the governing body worked would be invaluable.

An army without a leader isn't an army after all, no, without a leader they become individuals, and for one possessing true power those are easily dispatched.

While he does not have it, knowing who to kill is still just as important as the killing itself.

Was he always this paranoid?

"They talk to everycreature you've been in contact with, see your relationship with everypony, what you have done in your alone time, those types of things, and at the end of the year they give you an evaluation."

As the pony talked the world slowed down, this… was somewhat worrying.

The mare's words could not be 100% trusted.

No creature is the owner of truth after all.

But if one wished to give him free information he would not stop them, although…

From the way she speaks, it seems like these ponies have the ability to either view him at all times or know what he has done even if they did not observe him directly.

Mind reading is already possible as proved by that Golden Fuck, the same for control, both of which he is defenses against at the moment.

Truly, training must be done as fast as possible, lest he loses his Self, again.

"Now, for those who wish to stay in equestria permanently and by legal means you will, if you pass, have to go to a specific city like Canterlot, Manehattan, Vanhoover, TallTale, Fillydelpia or Baltimare to get your citizenship."

Unconsciously he registered the mare's words, consciously however his mind kept wondering about the capabilities of these ponies.

The full extent of their powers remained unknown, but the more he learned the more dangerous they kept becoming, and not in a way humans can match.

He wouldn't have to worry about fantasy creatures having the power to scramble his mind and make him into a slave if he was on Earth after all.

The ability to see the past is a point of thought too, but… just out of curiosity.

"Contrary to what some might think, all you need to prove to obtain it is the level of your education and age, according to your race that is, some creatures have big lifespans and so are judged differently."

For any other fool, the ability might seem worrying but for him?

It mattered little.

Secrets don't really matter to him.

Although… it is a weak point, and he certainly won't allow himself to keep something like that.

"For those who fail they will be sent back to their country of origin, not something I think will happen to you Star, but, it is still a very small possibility."

The pony said in a soft tone while the human simply guarded her words for later.

Seeing Star with a complicated expression she couldn't quite understand she extended her arm, intent on calming him down.

Only for him to immediately snap his hand back the moment her hoof made contact.

thump!*

The sudden movement startled her for a second, the next, when she realized what had happened a concerned look appeared on her face, only for her smile to return a second later.

Seeing the pony's display Dean forced a neutral expression on his face as he kept hearing her explanation.

His arm itched in irritation.

'Either this race is too damn friendly, or she is a damn good agent, either way…'

His teeth grinded, a small vein popped on his neck.

He is very well aware that there are things that can enrage him beyond what was possible before.

And as proven not even 30 minutes earlier he would kill someone if they angered him enough.

Something that became much easier to do now that he has something he actually cares about.

Had he not screamed at the top of his lungs he would have killed the pegasus, of this he is certain.

He didn't purely out of self-control.

He would more likely than not, not have cared for it had he not consumed the Ogre's blood, alas the chances of his elevated fuse being the blame of the Hanma are too high for him to accept it.

It was more out of principle than anything, never will he allow anything besides himself to change who he is.

So, he forced himself to stay calm.

If he were to kill someone it would be by his own will, not that of others.

But still, it infuriated him, that fact that this woman Keeps treating him like glass.

It pissed him off, to be thought of as weak by something as small as her.

He 'survived' the Ogre, even if humiliating there is pride in that alone.

The torture he passed through, the agony that both his mind and soul suffered would break lesser men.

Not. Him.

He survived in the hands of a dedicated Yuujirou Hanma whose only objective was to break his mind and this fucking pony is pitying him purely because of the chance, the CHANCE he could be forced to leave her country.

'Yes Fluttershy I am damn sure I can survive being homeless!'

There's a forest not even 100 meters away from here even!

He explicitly told the woman what had happened to him, and instead of understanding that yes, the man who was tortured for almost an entire day and killed 279 times didn't need help, she did the exact opposite!

How confusing can this woman be?!

As the human exasperated in his head the pony simply put her hoof back.

A complicated expression adorned her face as she did so, still, she tried to keep it hidden.

Star… clearly didn't like her fussing over him, at least not if his precious outburst was anything to go by, but it's ok.

One day… he won't shrink at the face of kindness, until then, patience.

Something she was an expert of.

With a cheerful tone, she continued speaking, teaching somehuman about her country was quite exciting.

Maybe she should show him some photos of the big cities, they are very different from Ponyville after all.

"For those who do not wish to permanently remain in equestria, they will receive a specific document that will allow them to stay in the country for a specified amount of time, normally 1 to 5 years."

With his eyes fixated on the pony, Dean started to think about the others she spoke of.

'Hmmn, they must have a way to discern if someone is being honest, such a thing is easily done with mere body language on earth, on a planet where magic exists it should be even more so.'

He looked at the pegasus's happy face as a confused expression befell his own.

He had an idea of what it was 'But…'

"Bits? Bits of what?"

Fluttershy froze with her mouth hanging open, a second later she blinked and promptly facehoofed herself.

Of course he doesn't know their currency! Even with his different form she constantly forgot she was in fact speaking with an alien.

An alien! How does somepony forget this?!

Turning around she took a small pouch above the stone stove and opened it, taking two bits with her teeth she turned around and put them on the table.

Pointing to the golden one she went to explain.

"This is a Celestial bit, made after the image of Princess Celestia, current ruler of the temporary monarch regimen of Equestria."

Dean observed the small golden coin as he digested the Pony's words.

He had to say, if these past days taught him something is that knowledge is power, the knowledge of the workings of the soul alone would accelerate his progress significantly.

Becoming the strongest is just a question of time.

‘IF you survive.’

Ah, yes, those little thoughts are still there.

Hadn't he killed that thing already?

‘I’ll survive, I’ll make sure of it.’

Doubt has no place in his mind anymore, if he says he will do it, then he will.

For now, he just has to make sure he is as powerful as possible, and then… impossible.

A grin appeared on his face, only to vanish a second later as he saw a familiar visage in the circular coin.

It was colored differently, its body was a mix of white and golden, stars surrounded the figure as it gave a faint smile, quite honestly he could say with certainty he had never seen a coin more beautiful and well done than this one.

Its beauty did not, however, manage to take his attention away from realizing what the thing in the center of it all was.

Just by seeing this… image, he could recognize it.

It was impossible, not to, after all, who would ever forget the image of their killer?

The image above that coin, cast in pure gold is of the same fucker that killed him.

Veins popped up on his arm, even now, his rage at the mere mention of the bastard didn't dissipate, no… it grew stronger.

Every day, every minute, every second he didn't punch that bastard was one where he became more and more impatient.

It killed him.

It. Killed. Him.

Not, a small offense by any extent of the concept.

He wasn't angry about dying, truly, no, It was a question of principles.

Independently if he is strong enough to fight back or even damage it he has the obligation of answering it back.

Even if he dies for it, he'll make sure that thing gets the message.

With a closed fist going through its skull.

Really, for more the fault of peculiar circumstances, h- no, ALL of him came back from death, he a mortal, something less than an ant for the celestial.

His eyes briefly glanced at Fluttershy as he remembered her words, the face finally had a name

'Celestia.'

Pretentious, for anyone else, but not the sun.

He died by its… hooves? Horn? Yes, horn.

And came back.

Quite honestly, he'd be severely disappointed if it didn't do the same, after he splattered its brain with his fist.

This blood debt would be paid, with his, or Its, well…

He looked at the image.

'Hers.'

A smile threatened to split his face.

The visage and identity of his adversary, finally revealed to him.

'A ruler of an entire country?'

He almost laughed at the irony.

Really…

'Can't the world be more balant?! It might as well scream at my face, giving me these gifts, putting me in these wonderful situations, it is as if it wants me to fight an entire country by myself.'

'Oh, the parallels.'

It would be fun, really, Yuujirou Hanma alone beat the strongest country on earth with his bare hands, surpassing their strongest weapons with ridiculous ease.

Why can't he do the same in this one?

Haaahahahahaaa!

"Uhm? Star?"

Shaking his head he looked at the pegasus.

"You are… smiling." The pegasus asked with a grin of her own, as if happy with his happiness.

Touching his mouth in reflex he felt his teeth, and smiled even more.

"I guess I am~," He said with a playful tone while supporting his face with his hand.

"Heha~" The equine blocked her mouth in a half-hearted attempt at stopping her giggling.

A weird feeling formed in Dean's chest as he saw it, she… would not be doing so had she been able to read his mind.

'What is this?'

Subsiding her laughter she pointed at the second, dark blue colored coin.

"And this is the lunar coin, made in the image of Princess Luna, sister of Princess Celestia, may her soul rest in peace."

Ignoring the pony clasping her hooves in a prayer he looked down at the dark blue coin and observed the image of the blue-colored unicorn.

The coin, just like the one before it was a work of art, the unicorn in it had a waving blue mane, a small smile on her face, her sclera was white.

On her back, there were haves of what he guessed was water, perhaps air, in the background a beautiful blue moon stood.

More importantly, however, were the buildings in front of her, he recognized them instantly, Azuchi-Momoyama, a type of Japanese architecture.

For but a moment the idea that a human of Japanese descent arrived on this planet before him gained more weight in his mind.

Only for him to dismiss it the other, without proof, this could be charted as a mere coincidence.

For a moment his mind turned to the words the Pegasus said.

With a curious tone, he asked.

"Is she… dead?"

The pony's eyes widened and then sharpened in anger.

"Oh, no! Princess Luna may be absent but she is most certainly not dead!"

The pony almost screamed at him, an action that somewhat startled him.

A culturally sensitive topic?

'Good, unstable people do talk more.'

His eyebrow lifted.

The pony shrank.

"I-I'm sorry Star, it's just… some ponies believe in truly nonsensical things, you are new, I shouldn't have snapped like that, I am sorry, but!"

Clop!

The pony clopped her hooves and smiled brightly completely ignoring her previous outburst.

'Does she believe an apology alone would have sufficed if I was truly offended? Or perhaps she does not care enough to go beyond?'

Little things, little hints, little cracks, he loved them.

The pony gave little hints at being intolerant of different views, her being sorry more for screaming at someone who ‘didn't know better’ rather than being sorry for screaming at all proved that enough.

Or perhaps she was simply passionate about it, could be both.

Either way, actions speak louder than words.

"We have to continue, you see, something really, really bad happened 300 years ago when the princesses still lived on the Everfree.”

“The Equestria from then was very different from now, ponies were, well… specicist, that is to say, they didn't like other races very much, but that doesn't matter for this history.

“What matters is that there were bad ponies in the world at the time, no one knew of them until 100 years later but they did something truly horrible.”

She shook her head with a downed expression as she looked at the Lunar bit.

“It was their fault, they were the main reason why Princess Luna was…”

Her voice dropped in volume as her eyes slowly widened, her expression slowly fell while her fur seemed to go down a few shades.

“...Taken… over… by… a…"

From one moment to the other cold shot out of her chest, spreading throughout her body and making her fur stand on edge.

Feathers ruffled frantically while her pupils dilated.

Even frozen, her eyes refused to do so much as move away from Star.

She looked intensely at the human, no, that's… not quite right, not at him but more specifically, at the wounds below his band-aids.

"D-demon."

She gulped as if only realizing something now.

Putting another tomato in his mouth Dean bit down while observing the Mare’s panic in silence with deadpan eyes.

Chewing the fruit he stayed silent as seconds passed.

All the while the pony kept trembling like a leaf while trying desperately to breathe in and out.

Had he been an ordinary man he would have been worried for her.

He is not an ordinary man.

His empathy died a long time ago.

'Is… is she only realizing what she did now?'

A sense of disappointment and… something else flooded his body.

He almost laughed as butterflies formed in his chest.

‘Ridiculous.’

The mare had rather bashfully proclaimed she would help him against a man who was given the title of Ogre, the strongest creature in the world, and one said to be as cruel as a demon.

He had very explicitly told her what that man had done, and she insisted on helping either way, just to cower after finally realizing the danger she was putting herself in.

‘Bullshit.’

Her words were full of it, he felt a little pity, she seemed so determined before.

It was somewhat sad.

He preferred to not be proven right so soon but…

At the end of the day.

No matter the form they take.

Or what leaves their mouth.

Vermin are still vermin.

Their words are just that, words, their weakness are not solely physical but mental, and for it, they cannot be trusted.

Their type does like to use tricks, try to escape the consequences, and use others to get what they want.

Incapable of doing it themselves.

Really, lying is in their nature.

They don't have the will to fight against who they are destined to be.

They are not like him, not like those men who don't accept reality, who fight with it with all their strength to achieve their wishes.

Their dreams.

It is to be expected.

Most creatures are slaves to their bodies, no better than animals in any way.

The visage of the 'brave' mare trembling like a tree during an earthquake is more than enough to prove just that.

Fear rules their lives, fear for others, fear for themselves, fear of others, these things had the habit of being afraid of everything.

They live for it, not in spite of it.

Why did he ever expect these creatures to have a lick of something resembling a code is beyond him.

He shook his head as he tried to bring his breathing under control, a sense of dizziness took over his mind at the insanity he was experiencing.

'This world really is something else.'

His eyes stayed glued to the diminutive pegasi as his hand covered his mouth.

'To make me feel something as alien as disappointment in someone besides myself, really…'

He sighed.

'What insanity is this?'

He looked at the pony's trembling form, the mere visage invoked disgust in him in a way only his own reflection ever did before, just… less.

But…

Memories passed through his mind, of his heart beating faster as he looked into glowing, blue steel-forged eyes, staring at his very soul with a determination he wished most humans had.

It saddened him to see someone lose their courage so fast.

Where had all that fierceness gone? That fire? That determination to ignore the wants of another and do what she wanted to?

Perhaps Yuujirou is influencing him, perhaps these thoughts originated from his own changes, he doesn't know but… seeing that fire no longer there felt like seeing the light around a fireplace slowly die.

The darkness around it closing in ever so slightly.

Much like that place.

Wanting to help or not the mare had been selfish in her own way, and he approved of it.

To see that fire be killed only by the mention of a demon of all things was disappointing and… disturbing in a way.

It was hard to explain but, the way he perceives the world now is very different from ordinary people.

After passing through everything in the past few days, he started to see and feel many more things, things like emotions.

Much like animals he could ‘smell’ some of them.

Even then, both because of his inexperience and the potency of his sense of smell they were incredibly hard to notice.

He gained the ability to sense malice in large quantities solely because of the ogre but he can feel more than just it.

The mare felt anger, anger, and fear for herself, at herself, there were many other scents he could not quite understand, but anger remained supreme within her.

I- no, those feelings, bubbling inside her, boiling like a cauldron made him feel something too.

In a twisted way, he felt… familiarity.

A sense of déjà vu, like he had already seen that before, experienced it even.

In that mare, he saw a… mirror.

Yes, a mirror.

One of his past self.

Of what he was.

Of what he would have become had he truly given up and curled up in the face of pain and fear.

It wasn't easy to ‘smell’ emotions, he’d as far as to say it was very hard, both because the scents were unfamiliar and because he could barely detect them.

So it said something about the pegasus when even he was able to sense them.

Beyond that, familiarity.

Familiarity allowed him to know it was there in the first place.

Self-hate, that, is what he is most familiar with.

Yes… the pony is a mirror.

A reflection.

But curiously enough, contrary to the dozens of times in the past, he didn't feel the urge to break it.

It wasn't a perfect reflection, no, his situation would be leagues worse than the pony’s had he given up.

But even then, seeing a caricature of what he could have become instead of imagining it was much more impactful.

Even more so the feeling her mere sight invoked -besides the disgust and disappointment- made him remember a particularly bad day in his youth.

It was… not a distant memory, but it was intense.

Intense enough for him to remember everything.

The pony, shaking like a leaf, with downed ears and almost whimpering on the chair, made his breath hitch.

Her form was… close, so close to his friend he could almost see them overlapping.

And so, without ever wanting to, he remembered.

One of the worst days of his life.

The day his dog died.

The day he learned what loss meant.

The feeling was so… similar, he couldn't compare it to anything else, that dog had been with him since the day he was born and stayed with him up until he turned 16.

He cried, for that entire day, and then the next.

And now he is feeling the same for a pony he hadn't talked to properly for even 4 hours.

His mind worked at maximum speed, his situation could be as innocent as feeling bad for a creature due to her being cute.

To something altering his brain.

The reaction in itself briefly made him think about whether or not the magic of this world was messing with him, but, no, at no point after waking up had he ever stopped trying to expunge the magic inside him.

That is without even mentioning how ridiculously easy it was to sense the magical energy inside his body, how it moved, how fast, and even how intense it was.

The magic in his limbs and torso was the same as the one in his brain, inactive, moving like water, aimless.

Purposeless.

He would notice if something tried to alter anything in his body, he may not be able to stop it but he’d surely notice it.

Only ridiculously slow changes would have any hope of not being noticed by him, and they would surely not show any effect after so little time.

That is to say, at this exact moment, throughout his entire body, he felt nothing.

So… why?

He doesn't care about the pony, even his disappointment is more of a broad thing than anything else.

Vermin like her aren't worth fussing over or wasting time on, hence why he hates them as a group, and not individuals.

So why? Why is he so glum?

It was as if….

‘No.’

He shook his head in disbelief, emotions are something he fully admits he is not good at, but it couldn't be that, right?

Maybe he’s seeing things that aren't there?

‘No, no no no.’

He’d notice it, just like he noticed the illusion in his mindscape if his brain was making things up he would certainly notice, or at the very least have a certain feeling something was happening.

His eyes sharpened.

Maybe… maybe it was really it?

He… it was weird, ludicrous, maybe even ridiculous but, this sadness, this glum he feels, and even the sensation in his chest.

He felt it before, just once in his life he felt it and with such intensity even seven years later he remembers it vividly.

He… he is mourning?

But, for what?

His finger taped and tapped his chin as the world around him vanished.

‘Why, why, why, whywhywhywhywhwywhywh-.’

“!”

His finger froze as his eyes almost widened in realization.

‘Ah.’

He understands it now, he is not sad because of the pony in itself, no.

No, no, no, no, no, his facets, they still bleed on him even now, the damage his resurrection caused upon the walls separating them are more likely than not irreversible until he experiments further.

He is not the only one feeling it, they are, this sadness is not and yet it is his, something… something about the pony saddened them, and for it they mourn.

His eyes sharpened as something passed through his mind, thoughts his and yet not his entered his brain.

He couldn't understand it all, if he had to compare it it would be like trying to speak with an alien, a creature so different its vocal cords were incapable of making the same sounds as him.

Yet… he understood enough.

His facets, they mourn because the thing in front of him is not a pony… it’s a corpse.

Realization struck him, his facets, although not sentient individually, know much more than him.

Their senses are their own, separated from his, and for it, they can both see more and less, in other words, one can have the context the other lacks.

Yes, how did he not see it before?

His facets do not see the material plane, they see the spiritual one they see only the living souls within.

Not something he has the capability to do.

But, if there’s something he understands, something he knows very well is that one can breathe, move, speak, and still be dead.

As far as his facets are concerned the creature he is looking at doesn't pass from a corpse.

Yes, It makes sense now.

Will and Soul are practically the same thing, one can not exist without the other.

It's like meat and blood, one does not exist without the other, at least not living ones.

That's why they see her as a corpse.

What else is a body with a dying will after all?

That… is the conclusion his facets arrived in.

And so, they mourned, even if not a human, even if her soul was different, even if they didn't know even a lick of the mare’s history they truly felt sorry for her.

Regardless of who they are in the material plane souls deserve respect, the loss of one is infinitely more important than the death of billions of meat suits.

Witnessing the loss of a soul who could have been more is not something his selves can bring themselves to stand emotionless over.

The death of will is the most profound one there is; he of all people knows this, he experienced it after all.

Even so… it was disconcerting for them to see someone’s will plummet so fast, so… abruptly.

Be it the nature of her soul or her state they cannot feel the pony’s spirit.

It was so small it might be as if it didn't… exist.

Something is wrong.

The pony is already dead, all she needs to do to realize it is to reach the end of her material form, and then… nothing.

That… fate.

No one deserves that, No. One.

A minuscule, almost non-existent feeling of sadness sprouted within Tyronus’s facet, only to be squashed mercilessly a moment later.

He let out a tired sigh, it appeared humanity’s curse of stagnation and rot existed even he-

SOMETHING IS WRONG!

‘Wait.’

thump*

His eyes almost widened as he remembered something, something he had grossly overlooked.

No, they overlook.

The pony… she was meek from the start, the will he saw in her eyes wasn't always there.

No, It surged at that moment, it burst out like a furious flame and much like anger, it decreased over time.

A burst of happiness almost overtook his soul, bleeding over to distant facets, and even his own

He had to do everything in his power just to not smile.

Yes, pony souls are most definitely different from human ones, something in Fluttershy's soul made his facets confuse her with a dying one.

Not a growing one.

The [Fire] of her [Soul] was so small if compared to a human one, anyone with the knowledge of the workings of the soul would believe it to be on the precipitous of inexistence.

In other words, its erasure was nothing but a guarantee.

But... If they started from the premise that it was a human soul, no, not a human soul, but one originating from his universe.

He could not be 100% certain but he was confident Equus existed, if not in another universe then at the very least another dimension.

Based on these assumptions that would inherently mean the body is not as unimportant as he believed.

After all, if the soul can only be extinguished after the body is killed then the body serves as an incredibly strong anchor.

Maybe that is why souls inhabit bodies in the fir-

He beat himself mentally, he couldn't diverge his thoughts now.

A soul is at risk.

She didn't lose her will, it just went back to where it was! Even more, she didn't grow as a person after the fact, she wasn't determined about it, she was just passionate!

Determination, she has nothing of it, no, that's not right she has determination, but it's hampered by her own mentality.

How did he not see it before?

Fluttershy did not achieve mind over matter and they judged her as if she had, the pegasus still believes in limits, and the impossible, of course, something as threatening as the Ogre will make her pause.

She is still ruled by her instincts!

For example, the very concept of determination is a persistent, steady, and unwavering commitment to a goal, the difference between his determination and hers is simple.

She shackles herself, the woman probably was never struck in her life, contrary to him, she had a relaxed life, most likely a peaceful one, contrary to his.

It's not that she is a weakling, it is that she never had the incentive to grow, just passion, not a need or want.

Passion is a strong and intense emotion of enthusiasm for something, it doesn't have discipline, it fluctuates over time.

It's the complete opposite of force of will!

Yes!

Force of will is determination, it's the strength of character to achieve a goal despite obstacles.

Passion often fuels the drive, while force of will sustains the effort and resilience needed to overcome everything.

She has love but no drive.

She has will, but not enough to discard her well-being or life in favor of a goal.

Her instinct of self-preservation overdrives her wish to do what she wants.

Inside his mind, he laughed in glee.

Another secret, revealed to him.

Even more, she isn't dead!

Her soul isn't being snuffed out, it’s being kindled!

His facets treated her like she was human but she wasn't, she’s weak yes, but that's just it, she was most likely always this weak.

He achieved mind over matter, she didn't, how could he forget it?! If he was in her situation his body would start killing itself.

But not her, the state of her mind did not reflect so heavily on her soul!

The good side of it all? As fragile as the woman proved herself to be, she still has will.

It is weak, incredibly so, but there’s something in there.

They he saw it!

Her courage at that time, it was a hint of someone she could be, someone she can still be.

But… can she bring that fire again?

He doesn't know but… he'd like to see it once more.

It was rather a beautiful sight after all.

Besides, the pony was kind to him when she didn't need to.

Something swelled in his chest.

He didn't feel pity for people like her, or gratitude but…

Maybe he should pay it back.

It will cost nothing besides time.

And he can spare some minutes.

Yuujirou hanma guided him with pain and sadism, make no mistake, he is thankful for it, truly, the man’s nature is what allowed him to become who he is, to give him the possibility to even evolve in the first place.

But perhaps he can be a little more ki- soft with the woman.
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Name: Fluttershy
Title: Animal Caretaker
Age: 15
Plane: Material
Location: Fluttershy's cottage/Equestria
Time: 6:37
Date: Ponysesho-day - 9th - Hayprance

Fluttershy trembled as her eyes forced themselves shut.

A demon, of all monsters the deepest parts of the everfree could conjure, a demon was inside her house.

'Be strong, BeStrongBeStrongBeStrongBeStrong.'

Thump!!!
Thump!!
Thump!

She repeated the mantra over and over in her head as her ponytrist words came to her, she had to calm down lest her heart kills her before the monster even has a chance to.

It would be a better fate but she’d prefer not to die at all.

Thump!
thump
thump

Slowly she managed to get her breathing under control, her chest still hurt and her heart kept beating frantically, fortunately, even if it continued to sting, it was better than before.

Yes… yes, that meanie is a Human, not a demon, a very evil Human but still one nonetheless.

It can't eat her soul in a slow, very very painful, and agonizing way, she… doesn't have to be afraid! Yes! It only managed to enter Star because of its blood, it probably can't jump bodies.

‘But didn't it possess him before?’

Thinking of it, she should keep away from Star just in case, he'd understand, that meanie was… harming him, he wouldn't want somepony else to get hurt right?

Yea, she doesn't need to run again, it's okay, as…as long as it keeps being inside Star it will all be OK.

Breathing steadily she slowly opened her eyes while her heart hammered in her chest.

‘It’s ok, everything is ok, stop trembling, your friend needs you, ma said Colts can't depend on weak mares, don't be weak Fluttershy, be strong Fluttershy!’

‘Don’t think of running, don't think of running Don’tThinkOfRunningDon’tThinkOfRunning!’

Resolutely she fully opened her eyes, a smile slowly forming on her lips as she did so.

She didn't need to run.

It couldn't harm her.

Only for it to fall as she came face to face with Star.

Blood-stained bandages filled her vision as the smell of metal hit her nose.

For a moment her eyes lost focus, everything besides the human became blurry as her brain went blank from the image in front of her, no, not blank.

Words and images assaulted her mind, unfocused, quick, distorted, for a moment, she became lost in a sea of voices.

‘I died… 279 times.’ ‘Human souls can't be erased’ ‘Kill me, again, again and again’ ‘After each death, I came back w̷e̶a̵k̷e̶r̷a̷n̸d̶w̴e̴a̷k̸e̸r̸’̴ ̷‘̷T̷h̶e̴n̶e̸x̸t̵t̷i̶m̵e̷I̸c̷a̶m̸e̴b̴a̶c̴k̷’̵ ̸‘̴D̶e̴a̵t̶h̵2̶7̴8̶’̷ ̶‘̷T̷h̵e̷b̶r̶a̷n̶c̷h̶e̸s̶c̸u̸t̸m̸y̶s̴k̸i̵n̵’̴ ̴‘̷I̵f̴t̸h̵e̶r̵e̴i̶s̶a̸n̴e̸x̵t̸t̶i̷m̷e̴’̶

Piiiiiiiiiiiiii*

THUMP!*

Starfield stared at her.

He just… stared at her

She stared back, mindlessly.

Wha… what was she thinking again?

you know very well you whorse

She… she couldn't quite tell with his small eyes and, neutral face? What he was feeling

One was already hard enough to decipher, she had no idea how humans could distinguish each other's expressions with such small eyes.

But she could try to do so through the rest of his face and… If she had to guess, she'd say he was looking at her in disappointment.

As expected... of you.

Her heart dropped as the world came back in focus.

That expression was… not an uncommon sight, at least not when she spoke with creatures other than her critters.

Her ears fell, as did her eyelashes.

A weight pressed on her back as even her wings fell like some sort of melting ice cream.

She was tired, she woke up recently but, still, she felt tired, Torpid.

She regretted getting up from bed.

Really, it was just a question of time.

The polite ones faked it, but she knew exactly what they thought of her, she knew what everypony thought of her.

It… wasn't undeserved, besides, how could she not?

For years those 3 made a point to remind her of it at every turn, even if others didn't speak it out loud out of politeness she knew what they thought.

What they all thought.

Star was the exception, was.

Why does she break everything good to her?

Seconds passed as she just stared at the human, bad memories appearing and disappearing from her mind all the while.

As they forced themselves into her brain, her breath hitched once again.

She knows what is happening, she passed through it before

For a moment he forgot how to breathe as her brain went blank.

A panic attack, she is having a panic attack.

She had no thoughts, no feelings, no… nothing.

No, there was something there.

‘Ah.’

It was acceptance.

‘Yes’

She… had been lying to herself for some time now hadn't she?

This always happened, she lived quietly, and then something she did always forced her to remember everything.

She just wanted to be left alone, have friends, talk to ponies, can't she have that?

A quiet life, surrounded by critters, by friends just as kind and caring as them?

That's all she wanted but… yes, now… now It’s more than enough time to accept the truth.

It always came back after all.

Why keep running?

‘He… hehehe.’

Suddenly she laughed inside her head.

’Just… give up.’

She couldn't hold it back, really, it was hilarious.

Everypony in her family, Everypony, her mother father, brother, grandpa, grandma, they all support her at every turn, encouraging her, being patient with her, believing in her, trusting in her to be better, and what does she do?

Evolves?

Gets better?

Makes friends?

Stops being a joke?

No…

No, she makes a point in proving how wrong they are At. Every. Turn, without ever trying to!

Isn't she just a natural-born disappointment?

Really, why wouldn't she laugh at a clown like herself?

Maybe she should try to be the next Ponyacci?

Her life is more of a joke of bad taste than anything else after all.

Maybe she could make others laugh by showing it?

It would be the only time she ever made some contribution to society after all, it wouldn't be bad.

Hoops was right, she really doesn't ever learn.

And this time… she doesn't have the excuse of it being something she can't control.

It was a good excuse, one of her best.

She should have realized that it would turn usless after a time too.

It was just as her grandpa always said it, like the sun and the moon, the truth always comes back.

’It already did fool, you just refused to listen!’

She doesn't deserve her family, she doesn't deserve her critters, she doesn't deserve anything.

She can't do as little as stand up for a creature in need, the sole thing she loves most in the world.

To help others.

Others? You have only helped animals you fool

If she can't even do something as small as help somecreature in front of her, what is she going to do when her family needs her? Refuse and keep being a parasite to them?

'Look at that, you've done it again.'

In the past, she could at least say to herself she was a good pony but now? Now she can't even do that.

Not after what she thought, not after what she had done to Star.

Is that her voice? It sounded like it, yes… yes it was her… voice?

Star is her friend, yes, even if he doesn't know it, he is but that alone doesn't mean she puts him at the same level of consideration as ponies from her family for example.

Hence why It wasn't as much as the look he gave her but what it meant in itself, more specifically what it reminded her of.

'Not even a full 24 hours Fluttershy.'

Herself.

No, not the reflection on those funny, little eyes of his, but the eyes themselves, they… reminded her of herself.

No, not herself as a pony but… what she represented.

'Not. Even. 24. Hours.'

So many times.

She lost count.

Of how many times she had seen those same eyes looking down on her.

At this point, It was like a mirror really.

'And you already showed.'

Everypony, and now everycreature besides her critters at one moment or another looked at her with those eyes.

And the worst of it? They weren't even wrong to do so.

Even in those small, little eyes, she could see herself.

That's who she is after all.

'How much.'

Disappointment…

'Of a failure you are.'

[size=1]'Not you too, please.'

Tears threatened to fall as Star shook his head at her display.

Disappointment in the form of a pony.

'I didn't even have a cha- no... I did, I just failed, like always, how typical of you Fluttershy.'

She couldn't fly properly, couldn't make friends, couldn't look at anypony’s eyes, couldn't speak with anycreature without them thinking of her as a disappointment, she couldn't even speak to new ponies without becoming a nervous wreck!

And now she somehow managed to disappoint an alien.

An alien that hadn't talked with her for even 4 hours!

Ponyville… the only reason she is even here is because she couldn't deal with huge amounts of ponies around her.

The small village barely had 100 permanent residents living in it.

Everypony knew everypony, avoiding the bad ones was easier that way.

Avoiding everypony was easier that way.

Even then, she bought a cottage at the edge of the Everfree.

She preferred dealing with creatures that could murder her than facing another Pony.

Ironically that only made her more of a coward.

And… standing here, in front of the human, ever after seeing his injuries, even after hearing his history, even after promising she’d help him, she thought it good that a demon of all things was locked up inside him.

That it couldn't hurt anypony else but him.

How?

She asked herself how cruel a creature could be, and now? Now she has her answer.

In the worst way, she couldn't have ever imagined.

Here she is being happy because another creature is suffering because his agony makes her able to live her carefree, lonely, and miserable life.

Happy because she isn't the one being struck by a monster’s fist.

’As if your death woukd change much.’

Pathetic, doesn't even begin to describe it.

Her eyes wandered through the human’s bandages as a single, small thought occurred to her.

'I don't need nor want your help!'

Starfield, he… is strong.

It was obvious, if she had that many cuts and injuries on her body she'd be a crying mess, curling up like a foal in the ground.

She wouldn't fight back, and as proven all those days ago she’d only be able to get up and run if her critters were in danger.

She… really doesn't have the strength to stand up for herself does she?

No… why would she? Why would meek little, pathetic Fluttershy be able to have any kind of strength?

Bucking bags don't buck back after all.

She… is horrible, she knows this, she doesn't want to be like this, she doesn't want to be herself.

She…

Her eyes lit for a moment as she looked at the human.

She wants to be somecreature like Star.

Star is… amazing.

He was bold, honest and… cool.

To keep being indifferent, to refuse to do so much as flinch even after losing a hand, even after knowing a demon of all things would most certainly kill him.

Really, it was amazing.

Or as Rainbow said it, cool.

The cyan pegasus had called her yesterday -The hospital had the number of everypony in the village apparently- to check on Starfield.

The flier was, embarrassingly enough, the only reason she reminded herself to put a cover on him, the human had little to no fur after all.

And she had let him sleep cold.

They talked, and the rainbow-maned pegasus had told her the history of when the human had woken up, of how the demon possessed him, of how he lost his hand due to the princess's spell.

And then, he resisted it, he forced the demon to leave his body and then stared at his decepated hand, he didn't shout, flinch, or even showed a pained expression

He just… stared at his hand, as if in apathy to his own pain.

She… she’d like to be able to pass through pain like him.

Alas, Fluttershy is… Fluttershy.

She cut her arm once, the knife got close to her bones, yes, she knows how much that alone hurt, she screamed, trashed and cried in pain but Star just… ignored a decepated hand as if it was a mosquito’s bite.

And, and that's not all!

Star resisted a sleep spell, a sleep spell cast by a member of the guard, the organization where every member receives a better education than anywhere else but Canterlot, you know, the capital of Equestria, the lair of the princess.

The wealthiest city in all of Equus.

A place where she rules directly.

Yes, those guards came from that place, and one casted the sleep spell, a spell that affects the brain directly, physically forcing the one struck to, as the name suggest, enter a state of deep sleep.

Resisting it isn't supposed to be possible.

That's why the sleep spell is the most widely used by the guards, if one does not dodge or block, they go down, they lose, instantly.

But not Star, no, Rainbow herself said it, he went down, but got on to get up, even with a stump for a hand, exhausted from fighting off the demon, after dying 279 and feeling enough pain to kill somepony multiple times over the human still tried to stand up again.

And he would have succeeded had the alicorn of the sun not acted.

Only after the princess took action did he go down.

Only after the strongest magical creature on all of Equus acted did. He. Go. Down.

Star is strong, she isn't, not by any extent of the word.

She tried to, she tried so much to be stronger, but it didn't matter, she never managed to go forward, too scared to keep going, too weak to take another step, too much of a failure to expect anything resembling success.

There are a dozen more ~~excuses~~ reasons, but in the end, it doesn't matter.

The truth is…

Fluttershy is… fluttershy, and no matter what she does that will never change.

Maybe it's time she realized it and accepted reality.

She was born to fail, why bother trying anymore?

Finally, the tears fell.

"You know, I am somewhat of a scared cat."

Or they would, had the human not interrupted her train of thought.

With tears still threatening to leave her eyes she looked upon the human’s blurry form.

She couldn't quite tell what expression he wore even at this distance but… she had the impression it wasn't the previous one.

Or perhaps she simply hoped it wasn't.

"Yeah, it's very easy to scare me you know, but… It's very hard to keep it that way.”

“Oh, my heart keeps beating in my chest even if I seem calm, make no mistake, but scared I am not, alert would be a better word for it but you have to understand something Shy."

He got up, went around the table, sat on the Pony's side, and, more by costume than anything, placed a hand on her mane.

Without the minimal conscious input, his fingers moved to caress her head.

It wasn't something he thought about, no, he simply did it.

Quite honestly, the situation reminded him of when his dog was at the end of his life.

At the time he had done everything he could to make him more comfortable.

He brought his favorite meal.

Put him in his bed.

And stayed with him for the entire day, just… petting him, even still, the boy wouldn't stop trembling and crying.

He cried at the time, both knew what was going to happen after all, it wasn't the worst day of his life but it came very close.

This is fortunately not the same case but even then, seeing animals cry always made him irritated.

And although the pony certainly couldn't be compared to anything besides a human, she was similar.

Enough so that he couldn't quite bring himself to stand still while seeing her cry at least.

It isn't empathy, he feels nothing towards the pony as a matter of fact, the only reason he is ‘helping’ her is because he hates weakness, and weaklings.

Maybe also because he wants to see that fire again.

At the same time, the only thing he loves in this world is strength, nothing more.

He saw what was inside the pony, the potential hidden in a meek shell, and for it, he truly wishes for her to bring it out again.

He is a selfish man, of that he is certain, and it is exactly because of this that he wants for the pony to be strong.

He wants enemies, he wants a fight, he wants to struggle for his life in the material world, he wants to win against creatures just as powerful as those men!

That fire he saw in her, it was beautiful.

No.

It is more precise to say his facets saw it, he only had the barest impression of it together with a blurred image.

A blue, glowing, scattered flame, floating in a void with small lights shining so, so far away.

The flame… It isn't a soul.

But it is the fire of it.

Fed by will, glowing and growing in power second after second.

Nourishing the body, and brightening the soul even more.

A perpetual energy reactor capable of generating infinite power, without a limit to its output, only needing something as vague as will to do its magic.

Even just the blurry, imperfect image of it was enough for him to know it.

Know that it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Perhaps that he will ever see.

In a strange way, that beauty is the reason he is alive.

The reason why he keeps moving forward every day.

Yuujirou Hanma, Baki, Pickle, Retsu, Katsumi Orochi, he bets all those men have beautiful flames burning inside them too.

What color are they? Red? Brown? Green? Yellow? Teal? White? He… doesn't know.

But, one day… he will make sure to find out.

His souls demanded nothing less of his Self.

In himself, they see that flame too, small, weak, colorless, but it is his, his reason for living, his reason for punching back, his motivation for getting up from the sofa and facing reality each day.

He moves forward, solely to kindle that flame.

And if he were to do the same for someone else? He’d be, not happy but… content, pleased.

He’s a vain man after all, he loves seeing beautiful things.

And that pony undoubtedly had something wonderful inside herself.

And just like his past self.

She just didn't know it.

With a somber tone, he continued speaking.

“Everyone in this world has a weakness, everyone has a flaw, and… that's fine, nothing is perfect.”

Moving his fingers he wiped the tears out of the pegasus eyes, with the other, more by costume than anything he forced her head still, even if he had no need to.

“Weak and strong only exist within a relativistic view, that is to say, in this world, there is nothing truly weak, or strong, just those that are weaker, and those that are stronger than you.”

The pony pushed her head onto his hand, rubbing her mane into him and forcing herself closer with surprising strength.

He… doesn't understand why creatures seek comfort while distressed, it truly did not make a lick of sense to him.

Maybe one day it did but… not now.

He knows why they do it of course he just… doesn't understand it.

Why run to someone when you can deal with it yourself? And even if you can't just… go on.

Or not, some don't.

'Pathetic'

Sighing he lessened the strength on his arm and let the pony’s head lean on his side, if it would make her hear his words better he had no problem with it.

Besides… as far as he knows the equines of earth were very social amongst themselves, perhaps these ponies are the same.

And her fur is soft.

“But there is something such as weaklings in this world, they are those that, even while knowing they can improve, even while hating their situation, even while detesting their lives they do nothing to leave the pit of shit they live in.”

“They complain, make excuses, blame others or even themselves while doing nothing to change it, castigating their bodies and their minds while still shackling themselves into the pit they live in, knowing very well that to leave that place, they will have to suffer.”

A frown appeared on his face.

“But they don't want it, they don't want to make an effort simply because they don't want to feel their bodies burning, their muscles tearing apart or even the mere exhaustion that comes after the work.”

He never spoke with others much, despite having common sense he doesn't truly know how people think, but then again, no one does.

So he didn't speak as if he did, no, he did not speak of others.

He spoke of himself.

Because that's the only Self he knows.

“No, even while complaining and chasting themselves they stay absolutely comfortable in the pit of shit they live in, and the worse ones? Even while screaming at the heavens how much they hate it, they become their own wardens…”

He sighed as a contemplative look adorned his face.

If… if he could make someone understand where they were going, maybe they could save themselves from it.

Regret is not something that ever goes away.

He above all knows this the best.

“...In a prison without locks.”

The pegasus's heart almost leaped out of her mouth as the human’s words reached her ears.

It was… as if he was talking about her.

Every word, phrase, and gesture, remembered her of… her.

Could… could he read minds?

“I-”

She tried to speak, only for the human to continue.

“I was in your situation once, 11 days ago in fact, I was… pathetic, ridiculous, a clown living in a self imposed joke named life, in other words, I was just as pathetic as you.”

The mare flinched.

He ignored it.

“I was a weakling, screaming at the world while doing nothing to leave the pit of shit I was in, I knew very well the type of person I was, still, I lied, lied, and blamed everything and everyone else for my situation.”

“I trained, not to better myself, but to get the satisfaction of pretending to have done something, knowing very well the minimum I had done would amount to nothing.”

“I have already told you about mind over matter and that I stole the ogre’s blood, what I did not tell you however is the why.”

Her ears shot up.

“I was, getting back from work at the time when suddenly, the entirety of the street I was in started to shake. At first, I thought it was an earthquake, the disaster was quite common in the iland I was in.”

“I was very rapidly proven wrong when a slab of a concrete wall almost killed me, the thing wasn't even falling, no it was flying towards me in a horizontal direction.”

He shook his hand.

“But that doesn't matter, what matters is what happened after.”

“You know, before that point, I believed in many things, I believed that the strongest human on the planet could at most deadlift 501 kilos, I believed the fastest human could run a mere 44 kilometers per hour.”

“And I believed that no matter how hard people tried they would never surpass nature and technology.”

“Seeing Yuujirou Hanma punch his son with enough strength to shake an iland with 377 thousand square kilometers just by the aftershock of his strikes proved me very, very wrong.”

The pony’s eyes widened as she looked up at him.

Reflexively taking advantage of the situation he began to scratch her throat, making the woman melt on his side and softly nicker.

He didn't want any interruptions, and so, he ignored the adorable sound, and kept speaking.

Still… he knows words would never be able to convey the absolute strength he saw that day, but he would try to do just that despite how impossible it was.

Oh, how he wishes he could simply show her his memories, she would understand it much better if he could.

But there's an Ogre inside his head, it isn't a good idea.

Mind over Matter or not, she wouldn't survive.

“When that fight ended I… was In shock, I just stood there, replaying those scenes over and over again in my head, the world just… disappeared to me as I fully realized that yes… in the end, everything I had done, was pointless.”

Lifting the pony-

"eep!"

-he put her in his legs and kept speaking while scratching her head.

“Before that I always blamed everyone, and everything else for my situation.”

“I was fat, miserable, poor, a loner, and suicidal, overall, I was a piece of trash in human form, and for those that could see it I stank just like one.”

The pony suddenly snapped her eyes toward him, forcing his hand away she narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth, intent on chastening him.

Only for him to force it shut with his thumb and index finger.

The pout she gave him was adorable.

But it would not make him relent.

With his other hand, he bopped the pony’s nose.

Immediately her eyes crossed to stare at her own muzzle.

Ignoring the amusing reaction he continued.

“One that liked to shift the blame to others and didn't have the strength to do so much as an exercise to rid himself of something he hated.”

“That fight, quite honestly it… was the best thing that ever happened to me, because it left me without any excuses.”

Pushing her snout away from his ~~grabbers, wormies~~ fingers her ears went up in interest at the human’s history.

It baffled her, really, she couldn't make any sense of it, even more, it seemed unbelievable but Star was… surprisingly similar to her.

Something that only confused her more.

After all, if he was like her less than 2 weeks ago, what had happened to change him so much?

Even more... can she do the same?

Dismissing her thoughts she moved her head and forced the human’s hand into her mane again.

As she did so a mere second later, his fingers started to move.

The sensation was… pleasing, and having somepo- somehuman talking and… nuzzling? Her made the bad thoughts go away.

It quite honestly reminded her of when she slept on her bed in Cloudsdale surrounded by her stuffed toys and soft cloud.

Just… now it felt like she was being nuzzled by a giant, soft, warm plushie.

S-she… doesn't like it much she… just needs someone to be with her for some time, her... episodes don't happen with frequency, but they do get worse after each one.

Although, if this is how her pets feel she can understand why they like her brush so much.

Letting him do this every day wouldn’t be bad, she liked the peace it brought her.

Petting herself wasn't really the same.

“After seeing those men fight I was forced to face reality, even I, illusioned as I pretended to be couldn't bring myself to ignore the truth, yes, in the end, everything I have ever done, every bad thing that happened to me, was in fact, my fault.”

“I stole the Ogre’s blood because I thought if I injected myself with it I would be able to train to become someone I could be proud to be, someone I wouldn't want to kill every time I looked at the mirror.”

A look of confusion adorned the Pegasus face.

Hadn't the Ogre’s blood been the thing responsible for that blast of killing intent that covered the entirety of Ponyville?

Star… didn't look like a fool, he’d certainly know that.

Why would he inject himself even while knowing what that thing was?

“Yes, I knew very well that that thing wanted me dead, I knew full well it was somewhat sentient, at least sentient enough to blast me with its malice and killing intent for two entire days.”

“Hmn?!”

The pony shot up and brought her face closer to his while staring at him with wide-open eyes, as if asking if he was an idiot.

He understood, the visions of being killed weren't by any means light or painless, from what he knows the Ogre’s blast covered the entirety of the pony village.

Most likely meaning the pegasus saw the visions too.

Even then, he had to hold his mouth not to laugh.

Using both his hands he clasped her cheeks, and started to slowly caress her.

He was quite impressed she hadn't complained up until now.

But then again if what he thinks is true then her race should enjoy nuzzling each other, petting wasn't quite it and some would probably hate it, but the yellow pegasus most likely enjoyed it enough not to slap him.

“Ah, yes, I did know what it was capable of, but you know what? I was done, at the time I saw that vial of blood and thought that it was my chance, even if death was guaranteed I preferred dying trying to be something more, than to live as the thing I was.”

Putting his hand on the pegasus back he gently made her sit on his lap again.

“And I think you understand this better than anyone in this village don't you?”

THUMP!*

Her heart almost beat out of her chest at the human’s words, he could! He could absolutely read her mind!

‘Aaaaaaaaaaaaa!’

Ignoring the pony’s frozen form and hanging mouth he continued.

“After arriving in this world, and being struck by that Mare, as I have already told you I went to that white space.”

Coming back from her thoughts the mare suddenly shook her head and nodded.

“That’s when the happiest day of my life came, honestly, the pain I felt was nothing compared to the joy I experienced after I achieved Mind over Matter.”

The human smiled, genuinely smiled.

His lips threatened to split as a toothy smile adorned his face, he didn't hold it back this time.

He might be serious and indifferent most of the time, but Dean Tyronus Starfield could still feel happiness.

Even the pony, without any empathic ability, could feel it, the happiness the man was experiencing due to something as small as a memory.

And it made her pause

A hint of envy enveloped her heart.

She… she had a good family, and although it sounded mean her life was probably better than Star’s but… she can't remember even a single thing that would make her this happy.

Not even the day she discovered her cutie mark compared to the human’s joy.

And, honestly? She was happy for it.

Happy for him.

And maybe, a little envious.

But just a little.

A smile formed on her lips as she lifted her hoof.

Only to freeze it the next second.

Eyes widened as she remembered something.

Her eyes moved to Star’s smiling face, slowly, her hoof hesitantly moved on to touch the human’s chest.

thump!
Thump!
Thump!!

Her heart hammered in her chest as she waited for the human’s reaction, only for the man to put his hand on her head again.

Her smile widened even more.

He didn't shrink at her touch.

Strong fluttershy go!

With a stupid grin on her face, her head unconsciously started to move in a little victory dance.

Even while happy however her mind went back to her previous thoughts.

She wants to have one too.

A memory so precious even the biggest and meanest of bad days couldn't get to her.

Her eyes gazed at the human.

Maybe… maybe one day she will.

She just might keep her first human friend after all.

A trot forward, that's all she wants.

And then… everything will get better.

“That day… the truth was revealed to me, Yuujirou Hanma’s strength did not come from his blood, but his soul.”

“All humans, animals, from the tiniest ants to the biggest whales have a soul, one that, if reaching a point where their will surpasses their brain’s ability to produce it, they achieve Mind Over Matter.”

“The power to make the impossible, not only possible but probable.”

Sigh*

His tone turned somber.

Regret… he doesn't think he will ever get rid of it.

But it's ok, he’ll go on regardless.

As he always will.

“I am no fool, I'd go as far as to say I have an analytical mind, and that same mind delivered the truth to me, the truth that all that time, all those years of suffering, of pain, of hate, both to myself in the world, were utterly pointless.”

Fluttershy’s eyes widened at the human’s tone.

Memories of years past entered her mind as she remembered a kind, old stallion’s words.

His voice he… spoke like her grandpa.

She remembered him telling her a story once, of when he did a very… bad thing in his life, and how the consequences followed him even a century later.

He didn't need to say the word, at the time she was just a foal, one who didn't understand anything, but now?

Now she knows what that tone conveyed.

Regret.

The human’s voice carried an amount of regret she had only seen old ponies like her grandpa have.

Ponies that lived for over a century.

“I could always have trained and become who I wanted to be Fluttershy, always, there was nothing stopping me, nothing.”

He clenched his fist as his other hand kept caressing the pony's head.

“That is the truth, I was a fool, the biggest clown in the history of earth.”

The human sighed as he looked up, as he did so his shoulders fell, and for but a moment Fluttershy thought she saw something in them.

“My belief of a ceiling I could not reach? My belief of a prison I could not escape? My belief of steel barred doors I could not open?”

He shook his head.

“It was all a lie, I was my own warden, keeping myself locked in a prison without ceilings, bars, walls, or even chains.”

The human’s eyes turned downcast as a serene atmosphere surrounded him.

“What a joke, a creature possessing the power to do anything it wants, and it chooses to live amongst the pigs.”

His eyes, still serene, turned toward the pegasus.

Thump!*

“My limits… were always imaginary.”

“And even if the same might not be true for you, even if doing something regardless of whether you try your hardest or not results in nothing but disappointment, even if you are restrained by what is possible in this universe, even If you are destined to be who you are, without any chance to change it for the better or worse.”

He lifted his finger and then paused for a moment.

“Even then…”

Lifting himself Dean took the shy pegasus in his arms and put her on the table, sitting once again he pushed his face closer to hers and fixed his eyes on her own.

“I want you to ask yourself a question.”

Clasping the pony’s cheeks he fixed her gaze on his.

Blue orbs stared into his with apprehension and nervousness.

He ignored it.

He would not let the pony avert her gaze, wanting to or not she will face him.

Whether the pony sees this day simply as an insane man rambling at her, or the time where she decides her future will depend completely on her.

Even then, regardless of what she chooses, he will not truly care.

Yes, he wants the pony to evolve, for her flame to glow and grow.

But, just as he discovered it himself, the only one who can help oneself, is their Self.

He can't make her stronger.

Neither does he want to.

He can't give her what she needs.

Neither does he want to.

He can't make her life better.

Neither does he want to.

No, what he can do is talk to her.

Not with words coming out of his mouth, but with them coming out of his soul.

How to explain it…

For him being honest, being… transparent is an expression of someone’s innermost thoughts, beliefs, and values.

The way one speaks and the way one acts says more than enough about who they are for those who can pierce the truth with just a gaze.

And although he is not capable of it, from what he saw, he is sure of only one thing.

That Fluttershy is without a doubt a coward.

A scared cat, a dog full of bark but no bite for her words.

A weakling who can't help herself, much less others.

Yes, despite her appearance and gentle nature Fluttershy had many, many characteristics he abhors.

But maybe… he can make the pony change that.

He can talk to her about what he believes.

About what he passed through.

About what he hopes.

And maybe, just maybe, she will be better.

Mentally, he laughed.

This situation… reminds him of what had happened before.

During that fight, and later on inside his mindscape Yuujirou Hanma opened his eye- no.

It is more precise to say that during that first fight, the Ogre opened his mind, during the second however, he opened his soul.

Doing so just by… being himself.

And that alone made him respect that man above all.

By being Yuujirou Hanma, the strongest creature on Earth showed him, without ever meaning to, the truth.

Of everything, including himself.

He is not Yuujirou Hanma, he will never be Yuujirou Hanma, he will never be a Hanma, no matter how much of that man’s blood flows within him, he is Dean Tyronus Starfield.

And that's enough.

Now… he only hopes his current self is enough to open the eyes of the Pony in front of him.

To the truth, of everything, the world, the people, and even… herself, the absolute, irrefutable truth that he learned all those days ago.

‘The only one who can take a step forward is yourself.’

He can't, and won't take that step for her.

She can either move forward, and risk losing everything, or not move at all.

Either way, the situation did not matter enough for him to care.

“I… asked myself the same thing when I arrived at my home, right after I witnessed that fight, I knew I would most likely die if I injected that man’s blood in me.”

“I was scared, so scared it took me 2 days to make up my mind, I had two options, ones that would decide everything from then on.”

Leaning back he closed both of his hands and presented them to the pony.

“Did I live, and continue as the same thing I hated?”

He opened his left hand.

The pony’s head moved.

“Or did I take the chance, and die knowing I tried, die knowing that this time, this single time in my life I truly did try to become something I could stand looking at in the mirror?”

He opened his right hand.

The pony’s head moved again, her eyes stayed fixated on his hand as she turned her entire face in a confused way.

Not waiting for the woman to choose, he continued.

He’d make sure she knew exactly what she was getting into before getting her answer.

“You hate yourself too, don't you?”

The pony’s eyes widened as she snapped her face toward him while at the same time leaning her neck back in surprise.

“You don't like who you are and what you are, you don't even like what you do as a matter of fact, most importantly of all you don't like that you couldn't keep that promise to help me either do you?”

Unconsciously the pony’s head moved to nod.

"Yes, you made a promise, if I recall correctly your exact words were ‘Now, hear me here mister, I don't care if you want my help or not, I will help you because that's what I want to do, And there's nothing you can do to stop me, got it?!’ right?”

The human said in a monotone tone as the pony, with her eyes still fixed on him, nodded.

She had nothing to say, or maybe, she didn't want to do so.

Either way, she kept quiet.

“Right?”

Thump!*

Her heartbeat quickened as the human’s tone darkened.

“Y-yes!”

She wasn't afraid of Star, for all he acted rough and talked darkly she knew the human would not hit her.

He must have liked the ponies from his world because he couldn't stop feeling her fur.

Not that she is complaining.

She saw him holding himself back from hugging her more than once.

Something… weird considering his aversion to her trying to touch him.

Had he been another pony doing it she would have felt strange, bothered, and weirded out but Star is… an alien.

He looked far too different from any creature she ever saw to see him in any other way besides a friendly, squishy, not-so-gentle giant that likes soft things a little bit much.

The fact her fur is soft is more likely than not a coincidence than anything else.

No, she was afraid, not because of what he did, or acted, but because of where the conversation was going.

She talked with her ponytrist many, many times, and while their sessions were extremely different from… this she knew how to detect the flow of a conversation.

Very soon, everything would become much more uncomfortable.

Honestly, this conversation has been a rollercoaster, there were good parts and very bad parts.

Even then, surprisingly enough, she doesn't feel like leaving despite everything, something weird even for her considering that she runs away even from foals in order to have the minimum amount of interaction possible.

Yes, she could turn her back and leave, fly away, or even kick Star out of her house, she doesn't think he will stop her from doing so but…

Thump!*

She doesn't want to, simply put, Star is right, his words hurt yes, but he is right.

Oh make no mistake, if he was just right she would still most likely kick him out, or run away herself, being right doesn't help.

Tartarus, her bullies were right, or maybe she made them right but it's not because of that that she stood there and took their words like a buck bag.

Without even speaking about her ponytrists, they studied psychology, they understand how a pony’s mind works, they understood her, but that still didn't help.

Star is honest, brutally so, he also understands her in a way she can't quite describe, but no.

It's not just because of that that she insists on hearing him despite everything.

The way he speaks, the way he acts, for her is rather obvious, before breakfast she thought he was talking to himself while screaming at her.

Now, she has the same feeling, just… different.

He is speaking with her, acknowledging her but at the same time, she has the impression he is talking to a mirror.

Not himself but… still himself in a way.

He understands her in a way her family, her ponytrist, and even her critters don't.

And that alone is enough for her to stay put and hear, truly and wholly hear what he says.

And while she doesn't know much about ponies, or humans she knows enough to be sure that this understanding comes from either an ability to read her mind or experience.

It was ridiculous but… Star, she thinks he passed through the same things she did, well, probably not the same but, close enough.

It wasn't very kindly worded but he himself said he was ‘Pathetic like her’ not too long ago.

It was… shocking in a way, a way where a tiny, almost undetectable grain of hope bloomed inside her.

And she wants to hear the truth, not from a voice in her head she isn't wholly sure is herself, or from somepony who will try to sugarcoat it, no, she wants to hear it from someone wholly honest.

Someone she is sure actually has even the slightest idea of what is being Fluttershy.

Not only that, she also wants to hear it, to understand how he did it.

How he went from being somehuman like her to… him, in just 11 days.

She wants to be better.

She doesn't want to be herself.

It's going to hurt, she knows it but… it's already past the time not to shrink at the bucks.

“It was a ridiculous promise, in it you excluded yourself from any kind of fight, and that is understandable, Yuujirou would rip your wings out and tear you in half had you tried to face him.”

Thump!

She holds a flinch at the human’s casual tone.

He… scolds her, and insults her but still… she doesn't think he hates her.

More like… he refuses to lie to her.

It’s hurtful, most ponies would probably be angry at him, she feels like she should be angry at him but… she isn't.

She prefers this rather than having a pony lying through their teeth and saying they believe in her.

“But even then, even after saying in a loud and clear tone that you would help regardless of whether I wanted or not, you still trembled before that monster.”

“For many that would not mean much, fear is s natural response to situations where one’s well-being is in danger after all.”

“Fearing something is natural, I fear many things myself, more than you ever will with your meat brain, if that was the only thing, we wouldn't be having this conversation, of that you can be sure.”

His eyes sharpened.

“But I know your type, I know what you were thinking, I didn't need to read your mind to do it, I know who you are because I was like you.”

The pony’s body started to tremble.

The human’s eyes hardened as he released the pony and pointed a finger at her.

The pony… it took a while to realize it but she reminded him of his past self, and above all people he knows who he was.

For it, he knows who she is.

“And I knew who I was, I knew of all the little lies I told myself, my little delusions and those small little thoughts, I know who I was, and for it, I know who you are.”

Sniff*

From one moment to the other tears started to fall from the pony’s eyes as she looked at the human’s eyes.

She… didn't expect this.

In her life, she had many… troubling thoughts, bad thoughts, stupid thoughts but never evil thoughts.

That… was until today.

How? More importantly, why?

She wasn't simply thankful she was safe, she wasn't just relieved she couldn't be harmed Tartarus she wasn't even happy because the monster couldn't kill anypony.

No, she was thankful that that monster was inside Star, relieved that it couldn't harm anyone else besides Star.

She was happy because the suffering of a creature meant peace to her, peace to keep living the same miserable life she did everything to distract herself from.

Shame doesn't begin to describe what she felt, what she feels, no, disgrace would be a better word.

Even she didn't know she could trot so low, but then again, she always does surprise herself in the worst ways.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I di-”

“Don’t… waste your breath.”

Tyronus's heavy voice resounded through the cottage, the pony, still sobbing, went quiet.

“Being sorry changes nothing, your words already proved to be worthless, they won't change the past, and neither the future, don’t be sorry.”

Lifting his hand he approached the pony, only for her to flinch back.

His expression softened, slowly this time, he moved his hand until it touched her cheek, holding both of them in his palms he extended his thumbs and wiped the pony’s tears away.

Really… he hates seeing fluttershy animals cry.

“Be better.”

Sighing he released the pony that for one moment moved to follow before forcing herself to sit again.

Getting out of the chair he turned around to look through the window, ignoring the sobbing sounds behind him all the while.

A feeling of sympathy ran through him at the scene but not a drop of empathy.

He cried too, in the past, much like her.

And just like him, she’ll realize that tears truly bring nothing but pain.

No one will help her.

She has to help herself.

She has to understand that she is alone.

And then, when she finally does… she will grow.

Just like he did.

Or fall.

Just like he almost did.

“That promise, it meant nothing to me, it was as important as a dead rat on the other side of the street but those… motions you did, the words you said showed me enough, they meant something to you, and that alone, makes your actions nothing short of disgraceful.”

Her ears fell.

But she refused to take her eyes away from the human’s back.

“You are worthless woman, a true and utter waste of space in this world, nothing you say, or do has any value.”

“You proved to the world that even what you value has no hold on your actions and thoughts, that even that which you value loses its meaning in the face of self-service.”

Tyronus spoke heavily, his words… didn't come from guesswork, it was weird, truly, and utterly bizarre.

Right now, he speaks with someone, an individual he should not have, even in a million years have met.

Someone who even a universe away could by all intents and purposes, be the perfect representation of a mirror.

He had no proof or even certainty of it, the way she acted, talked, and even her emotions, despite seeing and feeling them all those things didn't serve as concrete proof of his thoughts.

No, the person he thinks Fluttershy is, comes from… a feeling.

One that he betted everything he had into it.

In a single intuition.

Really, it was weird, truly weird, he never put much faith in things like it before, he always preferred to have proof and facts before even cogitating trusting something but…

Right now he… didn't care.

Maybe it was another, mysterious sense, maybe his facets saw something within her that he couldn't but…

From the deepest parts within him, within his soul, with only the barest hints of it, his Self was sure that Fluttershy, the alien creature, the one born a universe away, was more similar to him than anyone else in both worlds.

He doesn't trust things like guesses, feelings, or even intuition but… his knowledge of the soul, of his facets, and of how they can perceive things he cannot made it so he…

How to say it…

Made him believe in something.

Made him believe in his Selves.

And so, he didn't speak as if he was talking with a pony, or an alien, or even someone else.

No.

“I know you, I know that you are inconsequential to even your own life, much less for those around you.”

He spoke as if he was talking to himself.

Turning around he came face to face with the image of Fluttershy.

Tears streamed out of her hurt-filled eyes, ones that looked upon him with such emotion that he didn't think any human had any hope of expressing the same level of suffering as her.

But then again, with eyes like those reading her becomes much simpler.

thump*

Quite honestly he thought her tears would have been used over by this point.

But, he had to admit, even while apathetic to her, the visage in front of him wasn't pleasant, be any extent of the word.

Much to the contrary, the image of the yellow pegasus crying and shaking while trying her hardest to look at him brought a feeling of unpleasantness… and something else.

Pride flooded his body at the pegasus' insistence on staring at him.

He didn't like seeing the pony like that.

But it is necessary.

Briefly, he asked himself… did he look like this in one of his many deaths?

Even then his breath hitched at the look, briefly, he thought of stopping, before straightening his posture and continuing.

Pain is necessary for gain.

And honesty, although brutal, is wholly needed.

“But…”

A hopeful look crossed the pony’s face.

“This is completely by choice, you chose to make your words worthless the moment you thought of backing down.”

A skeptical look adorned his face as he realized something.

“Even more, that promise… was made more for yourself than me, wasn't it?”

Or perhaps he was told something.

“You had no need to promise anything, you could have simply done it regardless of my wants, no, you promised, in that specific ritual of yours so I couldn't make you back down.”

She opened her mouth.

He ignored her.

“But that's the thing, creatures like you and me are complex, we are not two-dimensional like animals, our actions and words have more than just one meaning, one motive.”

“That promise had meaning to you, perhaps even a cultural one, but that is irrelevant, you made those motions because you wanted something.”

“I wholeheartedly believe you made that promise with the intention of showing me I could not make you back down, but… it's not just that.”

He waved his index finger from one side to the other while shaking his head.

“No, no, no you know yourse- no, it is more precise to say that your subconscious mind knows you better than yourself.”

He paced back and forth as he lifted a finger, puzzles, how much he loved to solve them, and humans? Those are the best ones there are.

Ponies come close enough not to matter.

Thump! Thump! Thump! Thump!

While the human thought the pony froze at the same time her heartbeat quickened at his words.

How a creature that spoke so little with another could discover so much in so little time would probably be a mystery to most.

Not to her however.

Of course, judging him completely by her ~~guesses~~ discoveries it wouldn't be a surprise.

She knew this would happen, but still…

She felt nervous.

“That is to say, a part of you, the one who knows exactly who you are, the one who realized who Yuujirou Hanma truly was, knew what would happen.”

Slowly, he walked in circles around the table.

“Knew how you would react, and so, a second, minuscule reason embedded itself in your mind, something you would have realized had you known wholly who you self was.”

“My self?”

The pony finally spoke after minutes of silence.

“Irrelevant for now, I am not the one who should tell you who your Self is, but what matters here is that second reason you had, the promise you made, was a way to force yourself to keep it.”

Stopping in front of the pony he lowered his torso to look at her.

“Am I right?”

A sudden silence rained inside the room.

The mare, sitting in four hooves, looked apprehensively at the human.

She did not open her mouth, didn't move, or even look away from him.

Glup*

Nervously her hoof moved up to touch her chin as her eyes wandered through the room, thinking, imagining, guessing.

Seconds passed in complete silence while the human opted to finish his salad silently and the pony stood frozen in though

Seconds passed and then… minutes.

The human leaned on the wall and looked patiently at the pony’s thoughtful form with his arms crossed.

Finishing his tomato his mind started to wonder, about everything, from the moment he arrived on this planet, to now, and then to the pony in front of him.

Fluttershy.

He understands her, he truly does.

He too had difficulty in putting his thoughts into words, an answer of his could come in minutes simply because he couldn't find a satisfactory line of words to express himself.

Others… didn't understand that.

Strangers, ‘family, or ‘friends’ none of them did.

But he does.

He might have gained a few fuses after that fight but normally it is quite hard for him to get angry, or even shout surprisingly enough.

Patience, excluding certain things, is something he has in droves, and so, he waits for the pony, whether she leaves, or doesn't answer for hours on end, he won't care.

His hopes are far too low for him to be properly disappointed again.

Something he finds quite strange.

If not outright baffling.

He stopped expecting things from others a long time ago after all.

Even if minuscule, hoping for something is… alien.

Tok*

Hearing the sound of a hoof touching wood his attention returned outward.

“I… don't know.”

The pony answered in a low tone.

For anyone with more than two brain cells, they would realize the question wasn't made with the intention to simply know about a ridiculous promise, no.

It was a question about the pony’s Self.

Something made for her to think about who she is.

He expected the answer but… even then, it somewhat disappointed him.

He sighed, not in tiredness but in exasperation.

Softening his expression he spoke with a lighter tone.

“Most don't.”

Her eyes widened, perhaps not expecting that reaction.

“For a… long time, I didn't either, I didn't know who I was, but I wanted to, so for 2 years? I think I asked myself that question, who am I? What am I really?”

He uncrossed his arms

“During those two years, I’d constantly ask myself why am I doing this? Why am I talking like this? Why did I do that?”

“Constantly I did it so often I eventually started asking myself why I even bothered to get up from the bed, why I washed my mouth.”

“I kept asking myself minor, ridiculous things like Why do I eat, and giant, existential questions like, why do I exist?”

“I did this until I found all the answers to all the questions I could answer until… one day, I had nothing more to ask myself.”

He shrugged.

“But that's not the thing, I didn't search for answers that I would be satisfied with, no, I chased for those I knew to be true.”

“And so after those two years, after forcing myself to answer everything I wanted to, after making sure not even a smidge of my self was hidden from me, after truly and utterly being able to say without a hint of doubt that I knew myself, I asked one last question.”

Fluttershy leaned forward as her ears shot up.

“Who. Am. I?”

He lightly laughed at the pony’s bewildered expression.

It would do good for her to relax momentarily.

“I know, I know right, what a ridiculous question, but… you’d be surprised how many creatures can't answer that truthfully.”

He pointed at the pony with a serious expression and spoke with a deep tone.

“And you, are one of them.”

Ignoring the pegasus wince and standing fur he continued as if nothing had happened.

“Since then I knew exactly who and what I was, oh I was still delusional make no mistake, At the time I deluded myself by justifying that the fault of me being me, was not mine!”

He spread his arms down and smiled as if he’d just told a joke.

Fluttershy didn't get it.

“Ridiculous isn't it? But… you should want to know it right? The answer I arrived at? Well, that answer is very simple.”

“Dean Tyronus Starfield was a complete and utter waste of space, a man who should not have been born in the first place.”

The pony’s eyes narrowed angrily.

He had to hold back a laugh, the woman couldn't be bothered to stay angry at him even after all he said, but she does so the second he becomes self-deprecating.

Well, not that it matters, if time travel were ever to be invented he would travel through it simply to kill that bastard.

After making sure it wouldn't destroy him in the process of course, that piece of garbage isn't worth the life of even a squirrel, much less his current self.

“You, haven't done such a thing, you don't know the entirety of your Self but don't worry, if you don't know who you are, I’ll discover it for you.”

He sat on the chair once again and stared directly into the pony’s eyes.

“Let's see, you broke something you thought important, in favor of self-preservation, in other words, your commitment to something ends when your life is put at risk, speaking shortly, you are a liar.”

“Oh I know what you are thinking ‘But Dean, don't all creatures wish to live? What is wrong with putting yourself above others for the sake of survival?’ right?”

He shook his head.

“Typical weaklings always with an excuse ready to fire, animals, act in pure self-preservation, they act by instinct, all they do is fight, fuck, and survive.”

“Oh yes, they make friends, to enhance their chances of survival, they fuck, to guarantee the survival of their species, they die for their families, but… just due to evolutionary and instinctual traits.”

“Sacrificing themselves increases the chances of their genes being passed on to the next generation after all, you get it right?”

He opened his arms.

“We are better than animals Fluttershy, people can fight for something more than themselves, more than just the survival of their species, friends, and country, they can fight for concepts.”

“Concepts, like honor, code, faith, belief, philosophy, to prioritize your life and health over something you truly and utterly believe in is to become no better than an animal.”

“To fear injury is normal, to let that fear stop you from being yourself is not.”

His expression changed as his voice turned grim.

“Do not let anyone else tell you otherwise Fluttershy.”

Thump!*

“Yes, you would not kill yourself by fighting a bear because it ate your fruits, what value does food have in relation to your life after all? Fighting would be pointless, right?”

“uhmmm, yes?”

Dean had to hold a smile back.

The pony is evolving, during most of the conversation he was the only one speaking, normally she just

Now, for the first time, instead of simply nodding or gesturing, she spoke.

It is something small, yes, but he knows enough about how even these small things can mean much.

However, the answer did disappoint him a little.

“There is no right answer little fool, there’s only what you think, now, let me ask you again, and answer with your heart, Fighting would be pointless, right?”

Breathing deeply Fluttershy puffed her chest and looked at Dean.

“Yes.”

His lips formed a line.

“I would, I would fight against it, not because it took my food, no, I’d probably not even care about it honestly, I’d fight it because of principles.”

The pony tilted her head.

“Principle?”

He smiled, he didn't think she didn't know what the word itself meant, she was probably just egging him to explain himself more.

Good, understanding presages evolution.

“Well, the textbook explanation would be something like… Principles are fundamental beliefs or guidelines that shape behavior, decision-making, and actions, serving as the foundation for ethical, moral, or practical conduct in various contexts, such as personal values, organizational culture, or societal norms.”

He waved his hand.

“But then again we are not studying.”

He lifted his shoulders in a half-hearted attempt at a shrug.

“You see, rights don't exist, you are born entitled to nothing, just as you will die entitled to nothing, if rights existed I can guarantee you the world would be a very different place.”

His tone kept monotone; perhaps in the past, he would be angry, but not anymore.

“But… that's not true, whether you gain a loving family or not is a complete dice roll, a random universal chance you cannot even hope to control.”

“Some are fortunate others… get thrown into the trash bin while still being newborns.”

“WHAT?!”

The pony shouted with such strength a gust of wind slammed into his face.

His eyes turned serious as he sensed magic moving erratically around him, unfortunately, he couldn't sense much more.

‘Curious.’

If only he could see magic, how easier would it be to understand it?

Smiling ironically he continued.

“Right? That's why I said that you, me, and the entire world has the wonderful right to, nothing! the universe won't rearrange itself to force someone to adhere to a fancy piece of paper most decided to name law.”

“And even the law itself just states what will happen if you do not follow it, there isn't a supernatural force making you obey it no if you kill an infant, you will be punished, but what does punishment change? That baby is still dead!”

He breathed heavily as the pony gave him a wide-eyed look.

He understands it, really, the world is a piece of garbage, no matter how you look at it, some just realize it later than others.

“But.”

His tone turned serious as he lifted his finger.

“You can fight.”

And then smirked.

It was such a simple thing, really, how did it take so long for him to understand it?

Still in his chair, he slowly lifted his left arm.

“In this world, all you are given is a body.”

Taking the woman’s right hoof with his other hand he opened his palm.

“And the instincts on how to use it.”

Slowly he moved the woman’s hoof, making her close each of his fingers when suddenly, after the third, he felt something gripping them.

Releasing her arm he watched as she continued to close his fingers, gently, a… field warped around his hand, moving his fingers slowly.

He smiled, the woman probably never saw fingers before, at least not according to how she was acting.

Moving so slowly as if she were afraid to injure them.

Lifting his left arm

“This is a fist, a gesture humans do mainly before punching something, this fist, is all you have from the moment you are born, it doesn't… give you anything, it doesn't do anything for you, no, what it does is present a chance.”

“A chance to fight back against the world, against anything that would stand in your way, in this world, where nothing is guaranteed, you are the only one who you can rely on.”

“The world might say, a baby can't take care of itself, it's too weak, helpless, what can it do? It needs help, it needs a family, that's why rights exist to guarantee those things.”

“Again, again, and again, weaklings find the most hilarious excuses.”

His eyes sharpened as his voice grew deep.

”In the year 1954 a demon was born, on that day, all creatures on earth went down one rank in the pyramid of strength.”

“The name of that demon? Yuujirou Hanma, the day he was born that man forcibly took the milk of his own mother, not because he had to, but because he refused any sort of help.”

“If he wants it, he takes it, he does it, that was true even as a newborn.”

“Just by being himself, just by being the freest man in the world, that man reveals the crude and naked truth, the truth all weaklings refuse to acknowledge.”

He sighed.

“They are weak.”

“And there's nothing more than that, being born weak is just that, a weakness.”

He said it once and he will say it again, for those who achieve mind over matter the impossible is not only possible but probable.

No matter how ridiculous ordinary people might think it is.

With worried eyes, the pony looked at him.

“Star this… isn't that… man, an exception?”

Putting a finger in his chin he hummed.

“Fluttershy, your mentality is something like ‘If he can do it it’s because he had this, this, and that’ It's understandable, living caged by the universe you never thought of escaping its hold.”

“But you are not weak because of the choices imposed on you, you are weak because of your mentality, instead of thinking ‘He can but I cant’ you should think ‘If he can do it, what stops me from doing the same, and how can I change it?’.”

“In other words, if one does it, it means it's possible, it means there's a way to achieve it, if you are incapable of it, change that.”

Supporting his face with his hand he looked at the pegasus and waited.

Her expression was… complicated, had he not been able to smell her emotions he wouldn't know what she was thinking.

Anger, frustration, confusion? exasperation and… hope.

Speaking with her made it much easier to identify different scents, the only problem now was the intensity and context.

But for now, it doesn't matter, it was quite obvious the pegasus pony didn't like what he said.

He understands it, it is upsetting.

Unfortunately for her however, it didn't stop being just as true.

Finally, the pony opened her mouth slightly hesitating, she voiced her thoughts.

“No, there are good creatures in the world Star, and many who fight to do what’s right, this world is good.”

He held a smile, it was typical, those with no arguments choose to ignore the statements they don't know how to answer and do so weakly for the ones they think they can.

Or perhaps she simply wants to defend her worldview even while knowing she has no way to do so.

“I never said there weren't any, again… it's a dice roll, nothing is guaranteed Shy, as for those who fight for what is right? Don't joke around, individuals do that, not the universe.”

Clasping the pony’s cheek he touched his own on hers, ponies do nuzzle, right?

“They say rights are a guarantee to all people, but that's not right, is it? Even here, even now, the so-called innocent and naive suffer at the hands of the wicked.”

“Just like you did right?”

Her eyes widened.

He did not smile, he knows very well one is not born as meek, nervous, and shy as the pegasus, these people are made.

“Once again, your words prove me right, at the end of the day, those who are weak, those who cannot stand up for themselves only live because another decided not to end them, not because of fancy words on a piece of paper.”

And that's fine, the problem is not being this way, it's continuing to be this way.

The pony doesn't believe she can be better, and he wants to show her otherwise.

Show her that if she tries, truly tries, independently if she stays weak or becomes strong she can navigate through an indifferent universe without bowing her head.

That she can be more than just inconsequential in the face of an indifferent universe.

“You have no idea what strangers are capable of, one can very well stab you one day because it got too high on something, or simply because it felt like it.”

“And then… what will you do while bleeding on the ground? Cry over the injustice? Be angry because a creature freer than you decided to do what it wanted? Call the police?”

He shook his head while crossing his arms.

“I don't know what you would do, but I can tell you what I would, I’d be angry, furious at myself, dead, because I couldn't beat a random bastard that decided I had lived for long enough.”

“I know a law won't stop someone from stabbing me, I know God won't smite the unjust and wicked for being Evil, above all I know that in this world the only one I can trust to have my best interests in heart is myself.”

“I know my strength only depends on myself, that my survival depends on how much I fight, that my continued existence is wholly and absolutely dependent on my actions.”

“Just like yours is dependent only on yourself.”

He scoffed.

“Ask yourself this, you depend upon another to live even now, maybe not in a person specifically but the state, the princess, and the government with its laws.”

His voice took a mocking tone.

“You depend upon the willingness of all creatures to obey rules that don't truly shackle them, you depend completely on their fear of the consequences to stay alive, but one day…”

He pushed his face closer to the pony, and looked at her with a death stare.

He had no wish for the naive pony to die, whether she heard him or not though, is completely up to her.

Dead or alive, it’ll be hew sole fault.

“One day the dice will roll, and you’ll be unlucky enough to find someone who’s not afraid.”

thump
Thump!
THUMP!!

Leaning back he ignored the sound of the mare’s beating heart and continued normally.

“And then what will your life be like? What will the entirety of your history be resumed as? Whatever you did, lived, suffered, and surpassed, will it all be irrelevant in the face of someone who felt like ending your history on a mere impulse?”

“Yes… yes it will, all you have ever done, unmade, because you depended on another for your safety, because you accepted being weak, in favor of being comfortable, in favor of not feeling pain.”

His eyes narrowed

“Understand this Fluttershy, a dice roll is all it takes, for a life’s book to be burnt.”

Tap!*

Snapping her head towards the sound Fluttershy watched in silence as her beet juice ran through the table.

Huff*
Huff*
Huff*

Her breathing sped, she… doesn't know why but from one moment to the other the world became unfocused, her eyes refusing to leave the fallen juice even for a second.

Piiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Her ears flickered at the ringing sound as her pupils lost color.

thump Thump THUMP!

Was that her heart? No, it couldn't be but… why is her chest hurting.

And why is that thing smelling of metal?

Suddenly a hand held her chin and forcibly moved her face up, for a moment her eyes stayed glued on the table before she snapped back and looked forward.

Only to see Star’s contemplative look.

Something pressed her chest.

Uhhh-fuuuuh*

Oh, it was Star.

“But, you can fight back even against this universe’s chaos, or perhaps it’s destiny, let's go back to that bear for one moment ok?”

Unconsciously, she nodded while her heart kept hammering in her chest.

Gazing down she watched and felt as the human’s hand moved circles in her chest.

She appreciated it, really, even if somewhat embarrassed from needing to be calmed down she truly did appreciate Star’s gesture.

Judging by the decrease in pain she’d say she’s not the only one.

“The bear, in this context, is the dice, the encounter came at random, no fault of anyone, but then, seeing that thing eat your food right in front of you, you have a choice.”

“Fight it and risk your life for something as worthless as food, or let it go undisturbed and lose something far less important?”

“That’s where principles come in, you shouldn't let the thing steal your food from you, not because it is important, but because you have to fight back.”

“In the past when both of us were nothing but children, nothing but weak little creatures, we couldn't fight for ourselves, we couldn't have what we wanted without the specific permission of others, our lives were in the hands, or hooves of someone else.”

“Whether you lived or died depended completely upon, once again, a dice roll, a chance, we had no control.”

“We were weak, and for it, we bowed our heads to forces greater than ourselves, as weaklings, incapable of getting stronger we had excuses.”

He paused.

“Or did we?”

Fluttershy’s head turned, she knows that tone.

Less than an hour of talking with the human and she already knows he is about to say something absurd.

Absurd and insane and… probably true.

No.

It will be true.

Because apparently, the world is more crazy than she ever gave it credit for, and not Pinkie Pie crazy just… ‘this should not be magically or physically possible’ kind of crazy.

“No, it's more precise to say we never had any of them in the first place, we just made it up, excuses, or maybe… we believed in them so much they became real to us.”

“Can you believe it? A lie told so many times it became true?”

He didn't wait for the pegasus to answer, with a serious expression, he did it himself.

“I don't, understand this Fluttershy, the weak justify themselves with their disadvantages.”

“They have no accountability, responsibility, or courage, all they have are justifications and excuses. If you want to be something more, someone you can be proud of, someone you aren't ashamed of being, you Can't. Hide. Behind. Anything.”

“Death or not, injury or not, pain or not, you have to refuse to yield to a force greater than you, your actions are your own, danger, consequences, laws, expectations, you decide how to react according to them.”

“Not the other way around.”

“You can always fight back, you can always stand up for yourself, you can always disregard everything and everyone else, you can do anything, you just choose not to.”

Feeling the pony’s heartbeat lower he took his hand out of her chest, it was surprisingly fluffy.

“By not fighting back against that fucking bear I’d be blowing my head in the face of danger, and why? Because my life can end? Because I can face unpleasant consequences if I decide to walk whenever I want to? No.”

“The universe doesn't dictate my actions, my thoughts, my strength, neither does reality, and neither will a country, I do.”

“It just took me a while to realize that, but… that's not true for you, is it? No, of course not, you’d let even a breeze push you around.”

Her breath hitched at the comment.

She did not flinch.

“I don't think you realize it Fluttershy, but living as a stranger to yourself, isn't living at all, understand this, following the rules because you are afraid of breaking them and following them because you feel like it are two very different things.”

“As for the bear dilemma? Well, If you can't stand up for yourself even in the minor things, what hope do you have when the big ones arrive?”

The pony’s expression soured.

“Even still, you would not fight it, right? I understand you do not have the same principles as I, not fighting the bear in your case would not be a sign of weakness but…”

He lazily looked at the pony.

“Would you do so if it killed your critters?”

She froze.

He smiled.

Her fur stood on edge.

He understands her.

He truly does.

Why the pegasus would choose not to fight, she doesn't have the same views as him, for her letting the animal eat would not be a humiliating or bad thing.

She does love animals after all.

But what she didn't understand, is that the bear was a simple metaphor, cute she may be, bright she is not.

His comparison to a random person who could kill her at a whim made her think about her own weakness, he saw it, she didn't want that to happen.

She didn't want to be inconsequential.

He managed to get through her, to make her understand that strength is a necessity to live.

But not a necessity to be free.

She most likely doesn't want to become someone like him, even with his words she will more likely than not still follow societal norms.

That's why he said those words ‘Because you have to’ and ‘Because you felt like it.’

Currently, the pony thinks she has to follow them, even more, she is too much of a coward not to.

That's why his words were not said with the intention of changing her mind, but to plant something in her.

And idea.

The idea that she doesn't have to conform to anyone’s or anything’s expectations and rules.

It might sound like something small, but it's anything but.

He only achieved mind over matter because he was tired of meeting expectations, of having destined outcomes for his actions.

He knew he’d lose to the Ogre, no matter how long or hard he fought against him, he would lose.

And for a time he accepted that he accepted that he couldn't do it, and then… he didn't.

From then on he didn't accept shit, he’d punch that fucker with the sole intent of killing him regardless if he could do it or not, defeat, despite inevitable didn't have a place in his mind.

He rejected reality, not in his previous, pathetic way of blaming everything else but fighting against it in a hopeless battle, he knew he couldn't win, yes, but he still fought back.

Because any reality where he didn't win was unacceptable for his Self.

That's what the pony needs to do.

Fight back against everything and everyone, even herself.

Just like he did.

“Where do the limits of your promises lie? I am a stranger to you, breaking a promise to me would be of little importance but again… that was a promise for you just as it was for me, wasn't it?”

The pony stayed quiet, not quite knowing how to respond.

She… isn't a fighter, and she does know of the cycle of nature but… even she doesn't know what she’d do if one of her animal friends was turned into food by something as strong as a bear.

Scream, scold, fight? She truly doesn't know, fighting a bear would be impossible, no matter how hard she bucks it will at most annoy the animal.

She’d surely die if she did it but… would she just… let it go? Ignore the death of a friend because she can't do anything about it?

She could ask for help but… she doesn't think Star asked with that in mind.

Besides… would she even have the nerve to?

If this ever happened, wouldn't she be just as helpless as before?

Her eyes widened as she remembered something.

Star… fought against that human Yujiro, and he died.

She… isn't talking with a random Stallion, with an arrogant or bashful man, no.

She had forgotten for a moment, Star… died, he died in many, many horrible ways if his words are to be believed Just as she knows they are.

He died hundreds of times, believing full well he would not come back, still, in almost every death, he punched back.

Something burned in her eyes.

And now…

She looked at the band-aids warped around his body.

He will die the next time he sleeps.

Why isn't he afraid?

Even more, could she do it? Fight back because it would be far too pathetic not to?

‘No…’

No, she wouldn't.

But… well, she doesn't want to go through it of course but, she… wants to be able to say yes.

To Star.

She… admires him, she really does, being like him, one day, wouldn't be bad.

Maybe she can... do it?

Her head suddenly snapped to Star as she heard him speak.

Thump!

Anxiousness gripped her.

“The mere act of considering escaping from the consequences of your words already shows who you are as a pony, you cannot be trusted Fluttershy, precisely because what you say, what you promise, what you believe in dies as soon as your well being is put at stake.”

His face turned serious.

“Hence why you have no worth, why you made yourself worthless, if you do not wish to harm yourself fine! No one has a problem with it but what you did was beyond that.”

“You lied, knowing full well what would happen.”

“Live as you want Fluttershy, in a pit of shit, or a palace of gold, but never, never in your life lie to yourself again, you are a coward, and a weakling, do not act otherwise unless you wish to be otherwise.”

He backed away and looked down upon the quivering form of the pegasus pony.

She was nervous and anxious, but contrary to not even five minutes ago, she didn't cry.

‘Pride, in someone else… weird.’

He wasn't done, no, he didn't start this conversation to insult the woman or put her down, he started the talk solely because he wanted to see that flame again.

And he won't stop speaking until any hope of doing so is extinguished, or her eyes glow ablaze once more.

A thoughtful look appeared on his face.

“You wanted to run right?”

The pony stayed still., averting her face from the human.

BANG!

Only to flinch as the human slapped the table with all his strength.

“ANSWER ME!”

“Yes YES, I wanted to!”

“What else?! What else did you want to do, what else did you think?!”

Tyronus raised his voice as he started to interrogate the pony.

He wasn't angry, but he needed the woman to be honest with both him, and herself.

A problem can only be fixed after it is acknowledged, and even then it depends completely on one’s will to go further beyond and be better.

He can't give it to her, will.

He knows.

Above anyone in this world, as someone who has been at the bottom of the deepest pit imaginable and managed to survive, he knows how hard getting better can be.

How challenging it is, how painful it will be, and how many times one will want to give up how many times they will scream that they can't do it no matter how much they try, no matter how much they crave.

Above all, he knows how an idiot screaming that they can do it won't change shit.

No one in this world can help anyone else’s mind to heal, no one.

Those who don't want to believe they can be helped cannot evolve no matter what they are given, what they are told, or what they do.

Only they themselves can take that step.

Others can only encourage them to do it.

Seeing her actions, smelling her emotions, observing her reactions he is sure of it, this pony doesn't believe she can evolve.

Just like him, she has a vision, an image of who she is, and who she wants to be, and an abyss between both of these points.

And maybe she really can't, maybe she truly can't cut down some trees and make a bridge.

But the world isn't made of maybes.

It's made of truths.

Ones that can be changed by those willful enough.

And he wants to see it, to know it.

Whether or not this Pony can be one of them.

A person capable of changing even truths.

Well, not that it's something he can do for her.

He can't give her what she needs.

But he can help her give it to herself.

“Were you thankful I was the one being killed instead of you? Were you thankful for the wounds in my body, content that I was the one that suffered them and not you?!”

She nodded rapidly, her body shaking all the while.

He isn't angry, not really, it wouldn't matter if the pony tried to poison him he’d still not be angry.

No.

Weirdly enough… he’s excited.

The conversation is coming to an end.

And then… when it does.

He’ll finally get his answer.

Will she burn or die out? He is curious

“And you promised to help me?! Well with an ally like you, I don't need an enemy!”

“I’m s-sorry!”

She tried to scream, only for her voice to leave at a single higher pitch as it wavered.

“Are you? Are you sorry?! Would you say you were sorry had I not screamed at you that I knew?! Or would you continue being this trembling, shy, cowardly piece of a mare that you are?!”

She shook her head.

Her wings beat frantically at her sides.

She wants to run, she wants to leave, she doesn't want to hear Star’s words.

But she didn't.

When has running away ever helped her?

“YOU CAN'T FACE THE TRUTH, You think I’m angry at you for thinking that?! No you imbecile! If I cared for what every single goddamn miserable weakling thought of me I wouldn't live in the first place!”

Her hoof twitched.

She planted it more firmly on the table.

Crack

“I AM ANGRY BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO FACE REALITY, YOU REFUSE TO TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY.”

Her hoof pressed more into the table as she clenched her muscles.

Not this time, she won't run away this time.

“YOU REFUSE TO TAKE THE FALL OF ANYTHING UNLESS YOU ARE FORCED TO, LIKE NOW!”

She opened her mouth, only to close it a moment later, no, this time.

“Do you not see it?! Your ACTIONS speak for you, your CONDUCT speaks for you, and your THOUGHTS betray the falsity that you created at that moment, where you promised something YOU COULD NOT KEEP!”

She’ll face it.

“THAT is why you are worthless Fluttershy, because you give no worth to your words, actions, and even thoughts!”

Here, with the human screaming at her she… doesn't feel anything at least not toward him

It was weird, truly weird.

Can somepony even feel like this?

Like they and them are two different ponies?

She does.

“YOU ARE NOTHING!”

Shooting out of the table he turned around and walked to the window once again.

It was weird, truly and utterly weird, thinking that Fluttershy and fluttershy are different ponies.

Weirdest still, only one hates the other.

“And the worst of it all?”

Her ears went up as no tears fell from her eyes.

“You choose to be it.”

Turning back he gazed at the pony, this time, however, he couldn't hold a smile back.

She wasn't trembling, crying, or even ruffling her feathers.

She just stared at him, in a way he could almost call calm.

Walking toward her he spoke calmly

“That damn promise, let it be clear, I don't care if you keep it or not."

Staring intensely at her eyes he pointed at her heart, passing through her chest fluff and poking the soft skin beneath it all.

For a moment a look of pain crossed her face, even if diminished her chest still hurt.

"But you should."

THUMP!*

"Hear me woman, the only person you can trust without a single shadow of a doubt on this planet is yourself, but sometimes, not even this is true, born out of a weak mind some can sabotage their own self."

"That's why I say to you, lie to the world, lie to your family, friends, and allies but never, never lie to yourself, I said it once and I will do it again, loving as a stranger to yourself, is not living at all.”

“That's why I want to ask you a single thing, no, I want you to ask yourself a single thing.”

Sitting on the chair he breathed slowly and stared directly at the pony, who stared back quietly with a neutral expression.

“Do you want to die as the pony you are now?”

His tone was calm, perhaps a little curious, but still serene.

Fluttershy blinked.

“If your life were to end at this moment, for whatever reason big or small, random or planned, accidental or not, answer me, answer yourself this…”

Her ears twitched as they pointed directly toward the human.

“Would you be satisfied with the pony you are today?”

Dean leaned back.

Interlocking his fingers he waited for the woman’s answer.

As he did so silence enveloped the room, the pony’s face, still refusing to move away from the human adorned a thoughtful expression.

The question… wasn't hard, not even minimally, she knew the answer the second Star asked.

The thing is… it's… curious, interesting? She can't find the right words for it, just, deep.

Throughout their conversation, she understood many things about Star, one of them being that his words seemed to always have some sort of deeper meaning to them.

He wasn't hiding anything just… he expected her to understand without needing to explain.

Something he did rather nonchalantly.

And she heard it all, she understood it all.

And so, she’s asking herself… would the Fluttershy from ten, twenty, or thirty minutes ago even manage to answer it?

She didn't change mu- no, that's not quite right, she did change, compared to the past 6 years she might as well have transformed into another pony in these past minutes.

It was weird, thoughts and questions she would never have possessed had she not spoken with Star swirled in her mind in droves.

Even weirder, contrary to before, she actually feels like she can act on those same thoughts.

Her feathers shook.

No, that's not quite right is it? She could always have acted on them.

‘Ah’

Her eyes widened in realization.

She knows now, yes, Star really did change her.

Her chest feels light, no, perhaps she just thought it was heavy before.

Or maybe he made her change herself?

‘hehe~’

It was funny, most ponies would probably deem Star insane.

She probably would too had he not spoken about the entirety of his… Beliefs? Philosophy? Creed?

The specifics didn't matter, what matters is that she just… realized it.

The most obvious thing in the world.

That Inexistent chains are just that, inexistent.

It was funny, that she needed somehuman to make her realize it.

“... No, I would not.”

But it's past time for fun, it's about time she stopped acting like a clown.

With fully opened eyes she looked upon the human’s visage.

It… could have been a trick of the light, but she swears she saw it.

Star’s lips moved up.

And a blue light reflected on his eyes

“And that is reason enough to change.”

Fluttershy got up, trotting down she sat on the chair, turning her head and looking up at the human, a smile formed on her lips.

Suddenly, a thoughtful look adorned her face maybe she… could try it again?

With a stupid expression on her face, one that failed miserably in hiding her intentions she hesitantly opened her right wing.

Only to freeze as Star’s eyes fell on her.

Much like a foal getting caught she did not retract her wing.

He… it was funny, and she was probably imagining things but she felt like he was amused.

Regaining her nerves she slowly extended her wing, enveloping it on the human’s back she clenched the tips of her feathers.

And smiled toothly as Star rolled his eyes at her.

Yes… they are friends, even if he doesn't know it yet.

“Hmmm hmn humm hu huuuuu.”

Inside her mind she did a little victory dance as she hummed a song.

This day is going great!
.

.

.

.

.

Time: 7:12

Dean stood there, quietly watching the woman wobble her head in a silly dance, a stupid smile plastered on her face as her eyes formed a reversed U.

Either her happiness was courageous or his facets were, because he can't stop feeling butterflies in his stomach.

Damn cute pony.

Making him actually feel happy.

He was never one to enjoy physical contact, he’d as far as to say it irritated him to rather extreme levels.

Had this happened days prior the pony would have lost some of her teeth.

Maybe not.

He was always a sucker for cute things.

He’d probably feel horrible after doing it.

Besides the feeling of her wing is… different, not in a good or bad way, just different.

Different in a way his surprisingly pissy attitude toward everyone who touched him didn't feel even slightly annoyed just… neutral.

And that was weird enough for him.

Still, he felt no closer to the pegasus, they aren't friends, a single conversation will not change that but… he’ll give this to her.

Eyes not his watched as a scattered, blue fire gathered its dispersed remains forming a drop shaped flame, surrounded by mist and dim lights

It wasn't quite as bright as before, but still brighter than normal.

And most importantly, it burned.

She did it.

And if she wants something as ridiculous as a hug, he’ll humor her.

For now.

Unconsciously a smile formed on his lips.

He did it.

He got through her.

He’s… happy, they are happy.

But, it isn't over.

He has one last thing to do.

Words alone are not enough after all.

They never will.

“You know…”

Leaning her head away from the human she opened her eyes and stared at him curiously.

“Once upon a time, I bowed down to… everything, to the reality I believed to be unbreakable, to whenever I got to, even if to whoever I met.”

“I acted like a thousand different masks every time I talked to another, I ran at the mere sight of danger, pain, and effort.”

“I was… ridiculous.”

He felt her wings tighten.

He almost chuckled.

Right when he doesn't want help, it comes running toward him.

Not that it mattered of course.

The universe considers him inconsequential.

He’ll just have to train hard enough to be able to do the same.

“But not anymore, after being forced to fight against the Ogre I understood myself in a way I never thought possible, heh~ even then it took over 270 deaths for me to get it!”

Slam!

He slammed his fist on the table lightly.

“I am a lucky man, without the Ogre’s brutality I would have never achieved Mind over Matter, and for that, I am thankful.”

He sighed.

“And so after passing through that man’s hell and waking up I decided it, even if I die, even if my soul is erased, even if I am to be tortured for my words, for my actions, I will stay true to who I am.”

“If the day of my end ever comes, resultant from either, I will not blame my killer for it.”

“If being myself, if being free, if being honest to my Self has the price of death then I will go to the beyond knowing I was who I wanted to be.”

He turned to face the pegasus.

“Knowing I died following my creed, even if I did not manage to reach all my dreams I can speak with all of my soul in certainty, that I would not die with any regrets.”

“That’s why we are here, why I’m not desperately trying to find something that can save me from my destined death in the hands of that man.”

“Fear… doesn't control me any longer Fluttershy, I’ll live in spite of it, instead of for it.”

Her eyes briefly widened as her wing clenched on Star’s back.

She had forgotten.

Star acted so nonchalant she forgot the simple fact that Star will die if he doesn't find something to help him against that monster.

They had talked about it less than five minutes ago!

Her heartbeat shot up.

It's just… the way he speaks, he seems so… unworried.

Before she could think it further Star moved, instinctively her eyes snapped toward him.

Touching his heart he spoke deeply.

“That is the death I wish for.”

THUMP!

Ignoring the pegasus’ heartbeat the human got up, feathers slipped from his back as he did so.

Spreading his arms high he looked to the ceiling as if staring directly at the sky up above.

Or perhaps... at the sun

Strength cursed through his veins as he allowed the power of his facets to enter him.

The pony reminded him far too much of his past self, and so, the resemblance gave him an idea.

He only changed after being faced with the irrefutable truth that that fight presented him, and while he can't serve as an example like that man was to him, he can at the very least show her what courage is.

Even if it is as minuscule as his.

Yes… he can at least that much.

Taking a big breath of air he screamed with all his might, intent on letting the world hear his words.

Inside or outside the cottage, he wanted the entirety of the village to hear him.

Words… are just that, words, honest or not unless the pony can read his mind she will never know if he is being truthful or not.

And so, with that in mind, he screamed with all his lungs at the sky, the denizens might not be able to understand him, but even then he screamed in Japanese.

“I AM DEAN TYRONUS STARFIELD, THE MAN WHO WILL BE THE STRONGEST IN ALL WORLDS, MAY HEAVEN AND EARTH HEAR MY WORDS TODAY AND STRIKE ME DOWN IF THEY WISH!”

“INDEPENDENTLY OF ALL THE PROMISES OF CHAINS, OF PAIN, OF DEATH, AND TORTURE, LET IT BE KNOW, I WILL NEVER BE ANYTHING BESIDES MYSELF!”

“I AM DEAN TYRONUS STARFIELD THE FREEST MAN IN THE WORLD!”

“And may death come, to all those who try to challenge my claim.”

A statement.

For everything and everyone to hear.

For minutes he spoke, spoke, and spoke about being true to oneself but… he hadn't done anything to show it.

Screaming at the top of his lungs his intention of being the strongest, of killing any and all who stand in his way.

There really wasn't a more balant way to make his intentions clear.

Turning to the wide-eyed pegasus he spoke once again.

This conversation has gone on for long enough.

"We learned to speak so we could learn of each other's minds, but... as soon as we learned how to do so we also learned how to lie."

"And so, for that single, first lie, no words could ever be fully trusted again."

"No matter how honest one is their words can never be dealt with in absolutes, in facts, one can trust their words, think them true, but their beliefs do not impose over reality."

"Through lies from the mouth came the ones from the heart, excuses, not to others but ourselves, justifications, not to other ears but our own."

"Hence, why I never lie, with my mouth, with my actions, with my thoughts, with my soul, I. Never. Lie."

"An honest person allows others to enter their soul to see, without smokes and mirrors who they truly are, I am an honest man, without secrets, without lies, without hesitation."

"All words I speak come from my soul because I am Dean Tyronus Starfield, and I will never be, or pretend to be anyone else."

"More specifically I follow what I wish to be, a man with a creed, a man who is truly free, for although I am happy with who I am, I am not satisfied."

"And I hope you are not either, so here it is, my last question, can you follow the woman you wish to be? The version of Fluttershy you want to be?"

She snorted, really it was a reflective action, the answer was obvious.

Facing the human she puffed her chest and stared directly at his eyes, her own burned, but she kept firm.

Smiling sheepishly she nodded.

“Yeah, I can.”

DeanThey smiled.

Her will burned bright again.