(October 30th: 14th Day Since Capture)

The next few days had been an adjustment period for Neil. The infirmary may have only been a single room with an oddly large bathroom attached, but honestly, that was all the space he felt he needed. Now, even though he knew it would have otherwise sat unused, he couldn't help but feel like he was wasting the space assigned to him.

After taking some time to roughly measure the living room's dimensions (when taking a break from reading another useless book), he discovered the living room alone was large enough to fit his entire apartment in Swift Current. The excess given to him was absurd, in his opinion, and that didn't even take into account the other rooms of his suite.

For obvious reasons, the room where he spent the next most amount of time was the bedroom. Besides the comfortable reading nook in the living room, it quickly became his least disliked. The blue slate theme from the living room carpet extended into the bedroom and overtook the entire theme. Not a single trace of eye-burning white had entered the room, leaving only blues, purples, and greys to mix and create a shadowy cavern effect. A small amount of polished silver was used to trim the dark-colored furniture and the glass doors to his balcony, adding an illusion of silvery ore running through the 'rock'.

Overall, it was on the gaudier side of things. But, his new four-poster bed was the gaudiest piece of all. The midnight drapes and the comforter sparkled like stars, while the pale grey pillows eerily matched the color of the moon. His first evening sleeping in his new bed, he couldn't deny waking up in a cold sweat due to its similarity to Luna. However, he begrudgingly overlooked the night theme by his second evening. Whatever they used to make the mattress, he swore if he could steal, patent, and bring it back home with him, he would.

The next room over was a second spare bedroom, designed to look the same as the first. The only difference he noticed from his quick examination was that it was slightly smaller and lacked the personal balcony of the master bedroom.

In stark contrast was his least favorite room in the entire suite, the dining area. The blue slate carpet had been cut off at the door, only to be replaced with polished white hardwood flooring. Whether that was its natural color or it was somehow stained or bleached before being varnished, he didn't know. But, to continue the theme, in the center of the room sat a giant table made from a single slab of white wood, easily large enough to seat twelve of him with the same amount of chairs to match. Above that, a large golden chandelier with an uncountable amount of clear crystals was hung from the ceiling to refract the light it offered throughout the room.

The walls were cold; hard, polished, white, marble. But—underneath the finish—charcoal trees had been sketched and sealed. Their trunks weren't incredibly thick, and their branches were few. Still, they appeared healthy enough, judging by the aurora-colored fruits they bore.

There was only one other source of color in the room, coming from the two china cabinets, each covered by full glass doors carved into the wall. They were stocked with the finest-looking quality crystal plates, glasses, and whatever else a person could need. All of these were kept to the same aurora-themed color scheme. He avoided the room entirely by eating at the coffee table in front of the fireplace instead.

It was easy to see the overall theme of the suite. In Neil's opinion, even a dunce would pick up on the not-so-subtle design choices centered around Celestia's and Luna's unique appearances. His only question was if it was an intentional show of power. A constant reminder of the Royal's presence in the castle? Or was it something else? Either way, the final two rooms thankfully rejected that trend.

The fourth room, he quickly learned, was a smaller, cozy-looking office that looked reasonably standard in an older, aristocratic way. Most of the room was taken up by a beautifully carved brownish-red wooden desk with a high-backed, brown faux leather office chair behind it. Four wooden chairs made from the same wood as the desk, which also had cozy-looking fabric cushions that matched the blue carpet, were placed between the door and the desk. Instead of walls, sturdy-looking polished wood bookshelves enveloped the entire room from floor to ceiling.

And, last but not least, the final room could only be described as a Caribbean getaway built into an extra-large bathroom. From the ludicrously large sink counter and everything below it, most of the room was covered with expertly cut sandy tan tiles. However, the extra-large hot-tub-sized bath and massive shower were tiled with differing shades of aquamarine gems that shifted to look like the ripple of gentle waves.

He was normally a shower guy, but Neil couldn't deny that having the chance to relax in his new bath had been the highlight of his first day. He had been tempted by its array of twenty scents and soaps along the ledge, opting to use and doze off to the scent of coconut (to match the tropical theme).

Not everything was fun and relaxation, however.

That very evening, Dainty delivered not only his supper but an inch-thick stack of papers formally detailing his rights and obligations as an Ambassador. She also informed him that within the pile were multiple documents that required his signature, all of which were marked, to finalize his position. Not one to put it off (for long, that is. His food came first), he attempted to power through it before bed that night.

The sheer amount of legalese and unfamiliar political jargon quickly put that plan on pause. He was forced to call Dainty back and ask her to bring a specific kind of law dictionary that translated words like indemnity or jurisprudence. Many of the terms and agreements were temporary and loosely based on traditional agreements created between Equestria and its allies centuries ago. Even with the dictionary to help, it took hours to get through and sign all the required documents.

However, the worst thing that came out of the documents had nothing to do with them. Every mention of a five-year limitation or need for renewal hammered home the very real possibility that he wouldn't be making it home any time soon. That he might need all that time, and more, to find a way back to his friends and family... if they were willing to wait that long for him.

In the end, he would rate that pile of documents as the worst thing he ever had to read, including the battle reports within Battle for the Crystal Empire.

Then, after his late night dealing with documents, there was the fact that he was woken up the very next day at six in the morning by a serene-looking Calm. His eyes were barely open when the Unicorn promptly informed him about the changing of the guard (something Bulk normally did at eight in the morning). That wasn't a fun experience. After a short, if frustrated, back and forth, Neil learned all about the minute details and reasons behind the shift in schedule.

When it was just Bulk, he worked for twelve hours, from eight to eight, all six days a week (which had been news to Neil, learning that the ponies only had six days a week). After that, two of his four Lunar guards would work a six-hour shift, then change with the other two. Now, with an entire patrol of Solar guards, shift change was at six in the morning for Calm and Squall, at noon with Bulk and Hearth, then at six in the afternoon, and finally at midnight for the Lunar guards.

Calm also pointed out that the only exception was the weekend. During those two days, instead of pairs, there would be a solo guard through each six-hour rotation, allowing one guard from each pair to take the first day off and then switch around for the second day.

Needless to say, after having all of that dumped on him at too fucking early in the morning, without even a cup of coffee to stimulate his brain, he ordered Calm to inform him about the change at a more reasonable time. Then, once the Unicorn was gone, he went back to sleep.

Over the next few days, he learned that Dainty wasn't the only maid assigned exclusively to his suite. There was Dust Cover, a polite if a little timid, white unicorn mare with a grey tail and mane. Next was Feather Duster, a darker brown pegasus mare with a flamboyant magenta mane and tail, who never seemed to touch the ground. She unconsciously hovered around at eye level no matter what she was doing. And finally, the odd one of the bunch, an Earth Pony stallion with an unusual sheen to his otherwise light grey (at least, lighter than his) coat, with a silvery curled mane and tail, aptly named Silver Platter.

Thankfully, they seemed to take their jobs just as seriously as his guard. So, unless the maid currently on call was summoned with a little bell placed on the living room coffee table, they were pretty discrete about being seen when attending to their other duties. Still, he couldn't deny the annoying undercurrent at the back of his mind that a pony could just sneak into his room at any moment, for whatever reason.

At least in the infirmary, the nurses politely knocked before coming in.

Despite all of that, however, his days went exactly as if he was still in the infirmary. He would spend hours skimming through an increasingly useless number of books, now bolstered with encyclopedias containing information about the world's flora and fauna (plenty of which was bat-shit insane), until he was bored. After that, he would request the pile he read through to be returned and replaced with unread books related to his slowly expanding list of research topics.

Squall was... Neil didn't know if kind was correct, but the Pegasus was eager to drop by after sunset each day. He would usually barge in with an excited grin and a back laden with various adult beverages to share (Neil insisted they were put on Celestia's tab). The drinks themselves were typically fruity, with only a few having an unappealing hint of salt. Still, none of them ever gave him a buzz. It was something to do besides reading, at the very least, as he listened to Squall gossip on and on about the ins and outs of barracks life and the embarrassing shenanigans his fellow stallions got up to.

Each night, he asked about the costumes Squall picked up, but the Pegasus brushed off his question each time to keep it a surprise. The only hint Squall had given him was that they would be dressing up as a matching theme, an answer that did not ease his worries in the slightest.

The only exception to Neil's newly established schedule was a mid-afternoon visit on his second day. He had been reading a biology textbook in his nook, only to be interrupted by a heavy set of taps on the glass next to him. Surprised, he found Rainbow Dash without her skintight flight suit hovering beside his window. When he let her inside, she gave him a note from Twilight (detailing her next available slot for research). She also announced a surprise strength and endurance training session to celebrate his new living arrangement before she was too busy bringing in winter (whatever that meant).

Needless to say, he was even more appreciative of Squall when the stallion dropped by with drinks later that night.

Now, however, Neil was suffering from a quandary he'd never experienced before as a pony. The group discussed plans for Nightmare Night the same day he had moved in. The afternoon shift would trade-off with the Lunar Guards and change out of their uniform in his suite. The morning shift would also show up roughly around the same time. Once everyone was there, they would order a quick dinner, put on their costumes, and leave for Star Light's. It was a simple plan without any possibility of screwing up, or so he thought.

Any minute now, Bulk and Hearth would finish their shift. And yet, Neil found himself sitting in front of the unlit fireplace, holding an animated botany textbook in his wing. His inability to focus on the words in front of his face was only matched by a severe bout of nerves.

Why, though, was the question? Sure, back in Swift, he had friends and family over at his small apartment before (though not at the same time, thankfully). But this time felt very different, almost like he had to act as the host for the evening. Perhaps it was due to his surroundings. Was the opulence of his new room getting to him? Or, maybe it was the fact that he hardly knew anything about the ponies that made up his guard?

Did he even want to get to know his guards? They weren't his friends, obviously. They were hand, or in this case, hoof chosen by Celestia to watch over him. Whether that be to protect him or relay every hint of information they gleaned from him to her, was not up for debate. Yet, some part of him kept insisting they could be his friends if given a chance. On top of that, if he was stuck working alongside these ponies for one to five years...

Whatever the case, he was really looking forward to getting completely wasted later that night. And he knew that if he screwed things up, the chances of going out were slim to none. An outcome he wanted to avoid at all costs since he desperately needed a night to just relax without thinking.

When the clock he requisitioned from the infirmary chimed, marking the time as six in the evening, Neil set his book down on the coffee table. Even if he could focus his attention, the current section he was staring at, the harmless Worm-Roots of Minos, failed miserably at holding his interest.

With a small sigh, Neil stood up, out of his chair, and went to the front door. However, he only made it halfway before three sturdy, if polite, taps originated from his destination. Bulk, and by proxy Hearth, must have been relieved and were now waiting to be let in. He unconsciously trotted the rest of the way, shaving the time they had to wait by a few seconds before reaching out with a wing and opening the door.

"No use waiting out there, you two. Not sure what you need, but, uh, the shower's there," Neil told Bulk and Hearth as they walked in, pointing a wing towards the bathroom for a moment before shifting it towards the fireplace, "And if you're hungry, tonight's menu is over there. Just ring the bell, and one of the maids should show up... Which you already know, obviously." He finished, mentally berating himself.

"Thanks for allowin' us to change here, Neil," Bulk said, giving a small wave with his wing as he made a beeline for the bathroom.

"Yeah, it's a major time saver for me, Si- Neil," Hearth seconded as she followed Bulk into the room. "Saves me a five-minute flight to Watch HQ and back. And that's not even taking into account asking for an escort to walk back here," She added, following Bulk until he vanished behind the bathroom door.

"You need to ask for an escort?" Neil asked, both surprised and curious as to why, while he closed the door. "Even though you work here?"

"Without our armor, we aren't tied into the wards anymore," She informed him as her horn lit up with an amber-orange aura that quickly surrounded her helmet. With well-practiced ease, she removed her helmet without contacting her horn, allowing her blue mane to fall free, though it didn't remain blue for long. When her curled mane fell into place against her neck, its color had changed to a mix of maroon and burnt orange, whereas the white fur underneath shifted into a deep yellow. "That's probably why Sergeant Calm and Squall aren't here yet."

By the time her helmet settled against her back, Hearth had chosen the door to the left of his bathroom and quickly looked back at Neil. "Do you mind if I use this room to change?"

"Go ahead. It's the office, though, so it's a little cramped." Neil warned, even though he knew there should be more than enough room with only a little rearranging.

Apparently, that was good enough for her as she slipped into his office. The door closed behind her with an audible click, once more leaving him alone in the living room, wondering what, exactly, he needed to do. Should he ring the bell so that his current guests could order immediately? Or would it be proper to wait for the entire group before ordering?

'Another problem I never thought I'd run into in fucked up pony land, and why the hell am I even fretting about any of this!?' With a loud, equine snort, he turned around and, with an outstretched wing, quickly entered his bedroom. But only for a moment, as he scooped up the cloak Rarity made for him with a wing, and threw it on. After a few minor adjustments, he slipped the loop around the clasp to secure it in place and exited into the living room once more.

Before he could decide what to do next, another recognizable pair of knocks issued from his apartment door, leaving little to his imagination who it was. With a fretful energy, he trotted over to the door, only stopping long enough on the way to pick up the bell from the coffee table and give it a quick ring.

However, before he even reached the door, it was pushed open by an eager-looking Squall carrying a stiff red and black shopping bag with each wing. "... Won't mind, Bulk and Hearth are already inside. Hey Neil! Ready for a night of loud music, dressed-up mares, and booze?" He asked, looking for the closest surface to put his bags down.

"Mostly the booze, but yes," Neil answered as he watched the red Pegasus prance into his suite. In fact, the display calmed his nerves slightly, almost in a grounding manner, as he watched Squall disregard all the opulence brought about by his newfound title and just act like an excited, if girly, kind of dude.

Calm followed, his horn already flared, and he politely closed the door with his aura before giving Neil a quick nod in greeting. "Sorry, Squall's been waiting impatiently all day for this."

"And who wouldn't be?" Squall countered as he made a beeline toward the fireplace and placed the bags next to the menu. With that done, he promptly sank his butt into the nearest chair. "It's Nightmare Night! Let loose and have some fun for once."

"That Squall I hear yappin' about like an excited farm pup?" Bulk interrupted suddenly as he stepped out of the bathroom, looking refreshed in his natural colors. He also carried a large bundle of golden armor on his back as he exited.

"Bulk!" Squall immediately waved, gesturing for his fellow pegasus to sit on the couch beside him. "How'd the afternoon shift treat you? Anything exciting happen?"

Bulk returned the wave with a wing and gave Squall a short but cordial answer in return, "Just the norm," Before he looked to Neil, and shifted his body to the side to better show off the bundle of armor, where each piece seemed to be magnetically attached to itself. "Where do you want me to store this?"

At the same time, Neil caught a glint of orange emanating from the office door knob as it opened, revealing Hearth without her armor at all. "You can store it next to mine, Bulk," She offered, already halfway into the living room, before suddenly pausing. "If you don't mind us storing our kit in here, S-Neil?" She asked, her slip-up almost going unnoticed.

"The office or the spare bedroom, whatever works for you two," Neil answered with a shrug as he watched Hearth stand aside to allow Bulk through. With that taken care of, he made his way over to the fireplace.

With Squall claiming the only chair (which he had personally moved there), that left the two couches, one of which Calm had already claimed. Neil was tempted to claim the other one for half a moment but thought better of it. He wouldn't mind sitting with Bulk, but Hearth was still unknown, and she was partially why they were drinking as a group. So he sat next to Calm, claiming the other half of that couch.

After a quick look to confirm neither stallion seemed to mind, his focus settled on the red and black bags on the coffee table. "So, what's in the bags?"

"Our costumes," Squall supplied with a good-natured grin. "Yours and mine are in one bag, and Calm's is in the other."

"So I can finally see what you picked up?" Neil asked, his curiosity sparked as he reached out with a wing to the nearest bag.

Although Calm was between them, that didn't stop Squall from suddenly extending his wing to block him, "Nope!" The smaller Pegasus didn't have the reach to block his attempt at the bags, but Neil stopped and listened to Squall's reasoning anyway. "Not until after we eat."

"Really?" Neil asked, allowing a hint of his irritation to slip through. However, if Squall wanted to keep teasing until the end? An extra hour made little difference overall. Still, he couldn't help but turn to Calm and ask, "Do you know what they are?"

"I don't have the slightest idea beyond hearing something metallic." The elder brother informed him with a mild shrug. "Squall's the one who enjoys shopping for outfits, not me, and he tends to do well enough... most years."

Before he could push the subject any further, Hearth exited the office. She took quick stock of the room, noting everyone already sitting beside the fireplace, and approached the unclaimed couch. Bulk followed right behind her the entire way, no longer burdened with his bundle of armor, and claimed the only remaining spot next to her.

It might have been that they were now off duty and out of their armor, but Neil couldn't help but notice that Hearth looked particularly pleased with the situation.

Once everyone had settled into their seats, Squall opened up with a question for everyone, "So, what're you all looking forward to the most?"

Each of them answered in turn, whether they revolved around relaxing, dancing, drinking, mares, or a mix. But, as the conversation expanded to other subjects, Neil chose to sit back and listen. He learned a few interesting things in that regard, like the fact that Calm and Squall were technically half-brothers.

They both came from the same herd, meaning they shared the same Sire, but their Dams were different- except all four mares in the herd were still their mother. A little confusing and strange, but he already knew that aspect of Equestrian society was messed up.

To add to the confusion, Squall also mentioned he had five sisters, four older and one younger. Neil struggled to comprehend how one could live in such a chaotic-sounding household.

Compared to that, Hearth was on the opposite side of the coin when she shared her upbringing. She had three mothers total in her parents' herd. But, for a reason, she never found out, only her Dam chose to have foals. So, she only had a younger sister growing up. This, in turn, led into the story of how she earned her emblem, a cozy-looking brick fireplace, by taking care of her younger sister, which spawned the next topic of discussion.

Bulk was quick to speak up after her, sharing how he grew up on an orange farm that sounded very similar to Sweet Apple Acres. He quickly found a role he enjoyed, cataloging the supplies needed and filling out orders for their business partners. Yet, he always felt something was missing.

However, before Bulk could describe precisely what that was, Silver Platter appeared. The conversation was put on hold as the menu quickly passed from pony to pony, and Silver took down their orders. Given it was the Equestrian version of Halloween, Neil treated himself to a large order of spinach ravioli smothered in a creamy pumpkin parmesan cheese sauce.

As soon as the ordering was done, Silver gave a professional bow and excused himself, slipping out of the suite as quickly as he appeared.

Squall then asked Bulk to continue, and it was as if they were never interrupted in the first place. Ultimately, it took a misplaced shipping crate full of armor and spears to show up at the farm. Bulk returned to the train station with the crate and helped them trace the correct route, only for his mark to finally appear. From that point on, he joined the guard, and the rest was history.

Of course, when it came to Neil's turn, he had it easy. He remembered telling everyone at the bar that emblems weren't a thing where he came from. But, to bring Hearth up to speed, he reiterated. No magic, as ponies called it, meant no marks. As far as he was concerned, he didn't want or need one, and having one would be another way to mark him as different when he made his way home.

It wasn't long after that when dinner was delivered by not only Silver, pushing an extra-large cart in front of him but Dainty, who was also pushing two medium-sized carts in front of her with her aura. Unfortunately, no matter how big the coffee table was, it wasn't large enough to seat everyone. So, as Silver and Dainty pushed into the dining room, Neil reluctantly stood up and led his guest into the sterile-looking white room.

The dinner itself was, thankfully, a short affair. The food was excellent, as always, but it was clear Neil wasn't the only one who was antsy to get dressed up and go. Everyone was eating fast enough that Neil could imagine Blueblood grimacing at their lack of decorum. Even Squall, who seemed to delight in prolonging the costume reveal for as long as possible, appeared to be keeping up with the rest. Of course, as the only one to be delivered an Alicorn-sized meal, along with his relative inexperience in using his wings for refined control, he was still the last to finish.

The following clean-up went quickly and efficiently as they stacked their dirty dishes onto the carts, allowing some to reclaim their seats in the living room with a few exceptions. Hearth went directly to the office instead, opting to change into her costume immediately. The same went for Bulk, though he veered off towards the bathroom.

Squall, however, bounced up next to the coffee table. With an excited exuberance that was more childlike than adult-like, the Pegasus picked up one of the bags and held it out to his brother. "This one's for you. Care to guess what it is?"

At first, Calm simply tilted his head as he focused on the bag. Only for his horn to light up with its ghostly aura a second later. "Something more durable than last year's costume?" He asked, as he took the bag from his brother and opened it up a few inches away from his face.

"Well, yeah," Squall conceded, as they all watched Calm remove... a smaller brown paper bag stapled shut at the top by a slim, if colorful, piece of folded cardboard. The side facing Neil didn't reveal what the costume was. Still, it had a smiling pumpkin taking up one side with 'Designed to fit a medium stallion's build!' printed clearly in a speech bubble next to it.

"You were supposed to guess what it was first!" Squall pouted as he set aside the now-empty shopping bag.

"A bard?" Calm asked teasingly as he flipped open the cardboard top. The costume quickly hovered out of the bag in two separate parts. The first and smaller of the two was a floppy, if slightly flat-looking cap. It had a repeating pattern of white and orange stripes that began at the center of the floppy part and stretched out until it was sewn into a firm, white rim. There was also a large white feather sewn into the side.

The rest of the costume was a single audacious-looking garment in the rough, if shrunken, and shriveled shape of a pony. In a way, it reminded Neil of Rainbow's flight suit. However, where hers was sleek and uniform, the costume held in Calm's aura was a mish-mash of orange, white, and sky-blue fabrics, with unusual stitching that made the blue fabric parts poof out in a baggy-looking manner.

After a minute of shifting the costume around, looking at it from different angles, and stretching the scrunched-up orange and white fabric, Calm gave a firm nod and a smile. "Yeah, I can work with this," He said, giving his approval before he gestured towards Bulk and Hearth. "With those two rooms taken, is there anywhere else I could change?"

"You can use the spare bedroom if you want," Neil offered, pointing a wing towards the offered room.

"Thanks," Calm said as he stood up. His costume trailed behind him as he crossed the living room and claimed the spare bedroom as his own.

That left him and Squall as the only people remaining in the living room.

With an excited grin, Squall used his free wing to dig around in the second bag. Once he found what he was looking for, he pulled out another package similar to Calm's but twice as large. And, unlike Calm's, Neil, clearly, heard the distinct chink of lightweight metal brushing against metal as Squall held the package out to him.

Neil took the package in his wings, curious and worried, expecting it to have a certain amount of heft. Instead, the package was unusually light given its size as he brought it closer and flipped the cardboard label over. The first thing that caught his eye was the cropped shoulder-and-up image depicting Luna of all ponies. She was shown wearing a scant amount of armor, just a set of pauldrons, an exaggerated chest piece, and an open-face helmet while striking at an unseen target with an elaborately bejeweled spear made of silver.

On closer inspection, however, he felt more confused than anything else. He quickly realized it wasn't Luna, but an Alicorn stallion that looked strikingly similar. In an attempt to look for an answer, he glanced down at the two lines written at the bottom of the label.

'On behalf of the moon, will you right your wrongs and triumph over evil as Lunar Spear?' The larger of the two lines asked in extravagant, flowing script that gave away the name of the character on the label. Underneath that, in smaller plain text, it also stated, 'Included wings and horn are guaranteed to magically match the color of your coat! Spear sold separately.'

Flipping the label over, he saw the same smiling pumpkin on the back with a similar line written next to it. 'Designed to fit any stallion's build!'

It wasn't much to go off of as Neil looked back at Squall. "Lunar Spear?"

"Yep!" Squall answered with glee as he pulled out and proudly displayed another package of equal size. "And his older brother, Solar Sword! Both come from one of the longest-running graphic novels ever written, Solar Eclipse. Lunar Spear was only introduced a year ago, but he's still become one of Inky Black's most popular characters. It's my favorite series."

As Squall gushed over both characters, Neil took the opportunity to look over the white Alicorn depicted on Squall's package. There were similarities to Celestia, but the mane colors differed significantly, unlike the Luna clone on his costume package. Instead of the flowing aurora, Solar's gravity-defying mane was a mixture of red, orange, and yellow, imitating a fire. He was also drawn in a defensive posture, deflecting a sickly-looking green laser with his golden sword.

Overall, Neil had some mixed feelings about Squall's costume choice. At the very least, he felt more than a little repugnant at the thought of going out dressed as a Luna knock-off and representing her brand in any way. "Squall, is there a specific reason why you picked these costumes out?"

"A few, actually. First, I noticed you use your wings for everything. So, I needed to find a costume that wouldn't cover up or hinder your wings. Second, if you dress up as Lunar Spear, then ponies should hopefully assume your injured horn is part of the costume." Squall explained as he counted each reason on his wing.

After the second, however, there was a slight pause before Squall gave a third reason with a hint of embarrassment. "And, well, this is the first opportunity I had to dress up with a friend as my favorite character."

Neil couldn't deny the logic behind Squall's first two arguments, but there were also a few glaring problems with the costume. The lack of armor, or any proper clothing in general, is the worst reason. There was also something off about Squall's last reason. Something else, besides the fact that Squall somehow considered him a friend so quickly. "It sounded like you and Calm go out all the time. Shouldn't he be the one doing the themed costumes with you?"

"Most of the time, yeah, we do," Squall admitted quickly, "But Calm thinks the Solar Eclipse series is stupid. There's no way in Tartarus he'd dress up with me like this, which is why I was hoping..."

As Squall trailed off, his general demeanor changed ever so slightly. His posture shifted, making him look even smaller than he normally was. At the same time, his eyes widened, and his grin quickly changed to a despondent pout as he brought the package underneath his chin, as if he was begging like a...

And then it clicked. 'Squall's really trying to guilt me into this with puppy dog eyes?' He thought, unable to deny the Pegasus looked even more pathetically adorable than the average pony normally would. However, the blatant manipulation had the opposite effect on him.

"You don't need the pity act Squall," Neil groused, taking another look at the label of his costume. "Just, weren't there any other costumes that fit the bill? Why did it have to be princess knock-offs?"

"Princess knock-offs?" Squall asked, confused for the moment as his act slipped away. Only for his grin to come back as he connected the obvious dots. "Oh yeah, you haven't read Solar Eclipse. I can see how you'd think that about Princess Luna and Lunar Spear. But, to answer your question, Ripple also had a few villain costumes available. They're all mares, though, so you would have been fully exposed down below."

"Besides," Squall added, attacking Neil's princess problem from another angle, "Without his iconic weapon, it's just stallion armor, right? If you want, we could switch. I just thought you would look better in silver compared to gold."

"There's no need for that," Neil relented as he stood up and repositioned the costume underneath his wing. If these were the only options available, then it wasn't really Squall's fault. "I'll try it on. If you want, the dining room is available now. Or, you could wait for Bulk or Hearth to finish?"

"I'll wait for one of the rooms to free up," Squall offered as he opened the bag holding his costume. "Don't want that cute Pegasus maid flying in on me half-dressed now, do we?"

"I could only imagine her terrified screams if that ever happened," Neil countered in a half-sarcastic, half-joking tone as he crossed the room towards the main bedroom. Before Squall could respond, he was already passing through the door as he attempted to loosen his cloak clasp with a single wing. By the time he managed to work the loop of the button, the door faintly clicked behind him.

Now that he was alone, he released a haggard sigh as he placed the package on his bed. His cloak soon followed as he removed it with both wings and threw it. The garment landed at the end of the bed, partially hanging over the edge. Given the time the others already had to change, it was best to get this over with as soon as possible. He picked up his costume with one wing and tore the cardboard label off with the other.

The first thing he saw as he opened the bag was a pair of folded white wings attached to a flimsy-looking fabric harness, which conveniently covered everything else. Given his pair of somewhat functional wings, they were not needed. So, without further ado, he dumped the bag's contents onto the bedspread beside his cloak.

Honestly, he had been expecting more from Squall's assurances. The large wing harness, which he tossed aside, took up at least half the package folded as it was. There was a spindly-looking fake white horn about an inch or two longer than his own, which he also placed in the useless pile on top of the wings.

After that, only five pieces of armor remained to complete the look. The first and most eye-catching was the decorative collar-breastplate thing he'd seen both Luna and Celestia wear. This one was made with half the thickness, at most, but stretched out to cover an average stallion's entire front. It was still slightly small for him, but usable. However, as he slipped it on, the light, tinny-sounding metal wouldn't be affording him any real protection.

The shoulder guards were the next to go on, though they were a little finicky to deal with. Each had a loop of stretchable fabric attached to the underside, along with a long strip of the same material attaching the two. A pretty basic set-up overall as he placed the strap on his back, allowing a pauldron to dangle on each shoulder. Next, he slipped his front legs into their respective loops and pulled them back up to cover his shoulders. The overall fit was snug against his fur, but a few quick stretches showed there was still some give left in the backstrap.

Next was the flattened helmet, the only piece of armor that seemed to be broken, or so Neil thought at first. Upon closer inspection, the helmet appeared to have some actual craftsmanship worked into the design. Inside, there were a fair number of small, intricate-looking hinges that allowed the metal plates of the helmet to collapse for storage. A light pull from his wings popped the helmet back into shape with a satisfying little clink.

It took considerable force on both sides to pop the hinges loose and collapse the helmet again. Reforming the helmet a second time was just as easy, after which he placed it on his head. His horn slipped through without a problem, even with all the plaster and the suppressor ring near the base. The open face didn't impair his vision at all, either. Unfortunately, it wasn't a perfect fit. Despite the large ear holes, he felt the metal edges uncomfortably digging into his ears, but he could deal with that for a night.

All that was left was one remaining piece not shown on the label, and for good reason. At first glance, a more innocent person might mistake it for underbelly armor with a unique design. On the other hand, Neil could only describe it as a decorative codpiece at its best. Just from looks alone, the part that acted as a cup (vaguely sculpted to look like a large pair of balls) more than lived up to its design with ample space and plush cushioning inside. The four-foot half-pipe (with two separate straps designed to wrap around his body and hold it in place) extended off the codpiece to cover his sheath and underbelly, however...

Glancing at the full body mirror in the corner, it looked like he was sporting a massive fucking silver erection that pressed against almost the full length of his belly. He actually felt dirty wearing it, like he was some sort of male stripper in a knight costume, compared to just free-balling it. He also couldn't ignore the feeling of soft, plush velvet caressing and cradling one of the most sensitive parts of his anatomy.

'This has to be some sort of a fucked up gag,' Neil thought, remembering all the assurances Squall gave him about his costume and how it would stick to his Canadian sensibilities. 'Of course, Squall would think it's funny to try and cover up. He grew up in a culture where flashing your balls was second nature!' That was the only logical explanation, unless... Squall really thought costume armor designed to exaggerate the size of his balls and dick counted as covering up?

Unbidden, the image of Squall decked in armor with the same codpiece, at the same size, came to mind. If true, the domed tip would be pushing past the Pegasus' front legs.

As he shook that image out of his mind, another crazy thought came to him. What if it was designed this way to hide an actual erection? Was that a problem stallions encountered often? He hadn't seen anything like that on the streets, but he hoped to Hell not!.. Then again, a club full of half-drunk mares like Nurse Heart? All rubbing against you, trying their best to rile you up? That sounded a little like Hell now that he thought about it- as a pony, at least. If he was normal and surrounded by hot women? That would have been a great night out.

Shaking away his thoughts, Neil reached for one final, unintended piece to add to his costume. His cloak wasn't designed to go with armor, but it would give him peace of mind when it came to being exposed. Unfortunately, when he tried to put it on, he felt like an absolute idiot when the loop couldn't stretch over the breastplate and catch the button. In the end, he had to remove the helmet and then the breastplate, which finally allowed him to fasten his cloak with some minor adjustments around the shoulder guards.

Once he put the breastplate and the helmet back on, he gave himself one last, slow three-sixty look in the mirror. He could see more than a hint of silver underneath his tail at a certain angle. Still, despite the feelings it stirred, both mental and physical, that was arguably better in his mind than allowing anyone to see him au naturale. With his mind made up, knowing he was as ready as he ever would be and quite desperate for a drink, he made his way to the door. Without further ado, he reached out with a wing to grasp the doorknob, twisted it, and pushed it open.

Immediately, as if a set of speakers were unmuted, Calm's voice cut into the silence. "-ease tell me you didn't give Neil a matching costume." He said, sounding exasperated before he stopped talking.

Poking his head into the living room, Neil found himself to be the center of attention. Everyone was sitting around the fireplace and looking his way, with Calm and Bulk looking worried about something, and Hearth looked slightly confused. The only exception was Squall, who was standing. He also noticed everyone else had already finished changing into their costumes.

Calm looked to be the only pony fully covered from head to... toe? back-hoof? Either way, Neil had been correct with his original assumption. The striped white and orange fabric clung to his entire body like Rainbow's skintight flight suit. The only exception was the poofy blue fabrics strategically placed at each of Calm's significant joints. That wasn't the only thing that was blue about his costume, however. Strangely, the white feather in his cap had shifted to match Calm's fur as well.

Hearth's costume offered the next most coverage. She dressed up as the pony equivalent of a cowboy, judging by her black and red cowboy hat. To complement the look, she also wore a thick, durable-looking red denim vest with decorative black stitching and a black bandana around her neck. And, despite the Equestrian culture's crusade against pants, Neil was surprised to see a pair of (ass-less) faux-leather chaps covering her back legs, which had a cut-out large enough to reveal the emblem on her flank. To complete the look, she was wearing a set of fancy black and red cowboy boots, one for each hoof.

Despite his large size, Bulk's costume choice leaned towards the skimpier side. At first glance, Neil thought he made a sensible choice dressing up as a construction worker. He was wearing a white construction helmet with a grey lightning bolt stenciled on it and a pair of safety glasses. The thin, limp-looking, unbuttoned flannel tan vest was an odd choice, but it worked well enough since it exposed his muscular chest. Unfortunately, Bulk was also facing him directly, making Neil see something he never wanted to see on a guy, ever.

Instead of a pony equivalent of a tool belt, Bulk was wearing what he could only describe as a denim jean-string (with a complimentary ball pouch). If he had been generous, they could have been classified as jean short shorts... but with what little they covered, that would have been a lie.

Needless to say, Neil quickly averted his eyes, only to land on the final member of the group.

Squall blinked once, then twice, which caused his long and spindly red horn to wobble and tap against the hornhole cut into his helmet. However, that didn't stop the giant grin from slowly spreading over his muzzle. "See, I told you he wouldn't mind Calm!" He gloated slightly as he pointed a hoof in Neil's direction.

Lifting his leg like that gave Neil more than enough opportunity to see they were wearing the same costume (except Squall's armor was gold tinted), including the extended codpiece. Strangely, despite the apparent difference in body length, both codpieces stopped short of their front legs by about two inches.

"I wouldn't mind what?" Neil asked, averting his eyes from Squall and focusing on Calm as he stepped into the room. Even so, he didn't miss the Pegasus' grin faltering a little as he stepped out in his fully cloaked costume.

"Dressing up as a character out of a porn comic?" Calm questioned, looking over his costume.

Whether Calm was questioning his choice to wear the costume in the first place, or the addition of his cloak to cover the lewder aspects of it, Neil wasn't exactly sure. But, before he could say anything, Squall spoke up.

"How many times do I have to tell you it isn't a porn comic!" The Pegasus protested, with a look of betrayal as he poked his brother in the shoulder. "It's a best-selling graphic novel."

"Okay, it's a graphic novel," Calm conceded with an eye roll and a nonchalant shrug as if they had these types of arguments all the time. "It's just a coincidence that the heroes rut the villains into submission more often than not."

"Really?" Squall countered immediately, "And how would you know that since you never read them?"

Calm gave a pointed look at all the other ponies in the room before saying anything. "I don't think you want me to answer that with present company."

"Oh no," Squall shook his head and pressed his hoof into Calm's shoulder to pressure his brother into answering. "You started this, and I'm going to finish it. Do you read my graphic novels in secret?"

Calm slowly shook his head as his horn ignited. It formed an aura around Squall's hoof, which he removed from his shoulder, making it look like Squall was pointing at Neil again. Strangely, his aura didn't dissipate after that, instead keeping his brother's hoof firmly in the air as he answered.

"Fine, but just remember you asked for it. I know because we share an apartment with fairly thin walls. I can hear well enough when you reach the epic battles at the finale," Calm explained, as Squall's face turned pale, at first, from the obvious implications, only to shift to a slightly deeper red compared to normal. "Why do you think I'm always out running errands by the time you finish?"

Squall wasn't the only pony, either. Hearth was doing her best impression of a Pikachu dressed up as a cowboy outlaw, with how red her cheeks had become. She was focused solely on the empty fireplace as if locked into an epic, life-or-death staring contest.

Bulk also had a stern glint in his eye as he spoke up before things could escalate further. "Now hold on, both'a you. We've all seen and heard worse in the barracks, right Calm? So drop it," He rebuked, looking pointedly at Squall's held hoof. Getting the point across, Calm immediately released his hold, allowing Squall to stand on all fours.

Bulk allowed a few seconds of silence to pass as he watched both Calm and Squall, just to make sure things remained calm before he continued, "We're all gussied up and ready to go now, so why don' we go?"

"I'll second that," Hearth quickly followed up, "We could all use a few drinks to cool off, then get to know each other... without the embarrassing details."

Calm was quick to nod in agreement.

Squall took a few moments to straighten out his golden collar and shoulder pauldrons to calm down before giving Bulk a reluctant nod. As the other ponies stood up from their seats, however, the Pegasus opted to trot over to Neil.

"Before we go, I just want to know if I picked the wrong costume. For next time, y'know?" He asked, hopefully, though Neil saw his ears were wilting noticeably. "If there is a next time..."

"There might be a next time. It all depends on how long it takes to find a way home." Neil confirmed, cementing that thought in both of their heads. "No offense, but so far, everything I've seen and dealt with is bat-shit crazy. If it wasn't for the alcohol, I'd lose my mind."

He idly noted two separate twitches from Hearth and Squall while Bulk seemed to be used to his foul language. But, before he could be rebuked, he answered Squall's original question. "The costume on the other ha- hoof..." He paused, thinking how best to put his words. He could have been blunt, but after Calm's revelation, it would have felt like kicking a depressed dog... after it was scolded for humping a couch pillow.

"I would have chosen something with a little more coverage. Something similar to..." He was about to gesture towards Calm, but now that the Unicorn was standing upright and walking towards the door, Neil noticed two disturbing things about the bard costume he hadn't before. First, the tail-hole was aligned so that Calm's tail was flagged almost vertically. And secondly, unlike Rainbow's skintight flight suit, which was designed to slim her figure for aerodynamics, Calm's did the exact opposite. The fabric seemed to grip and spread his butt cheeks, allowing the seam to press into the resulting gap and paint a picture that left absolutely nothing to the imagination.

"... None of the costumes in this room," He admitted, quickly diverting his eyes up toward the ceiling.

With nothing else to say, Neil quickly joined the three closest to the door, with Squall following beside him. Thankfully, once he was close enough, he could shift his focus to Bulk's helmet or Hearth's cowboy hat without having to worry about seeing anything unsightly as they left.

As much as he was craving a drink, Neil was starting to have second thoughts about a dance club full of ponies wearing costumes that were even more slutty.

~~~

It was a strange twist of fate that the path Squall directed their little group along also passed through an area of the city Neil knew very well. At first, he initially thought the dance club they were heading to would be situated somewhere on the upper shelf, similar to the Brass Bells. Instead, Squall had taken them south to the nearest stairwell to the business shelf. The very same shelf that Neil haunted for weeks. They weren't close to where he was captured, which was closer to the southern ledge. But Squall took them on a quick stroll through a busy Restaurant Row.

Seeing the ordinarily bland, if busy in the daytime, street transformed into a Halloween theme park was shocking. Not only that, but the street was also bustling with activity despite the moon rising an hour ago. The sidewalks were lined with themed stalls, each with unique smelling foods and piles of candy or games of chance with cute and terrifying toys available to win. Ponies of all shapes and sizes were trotting about or waiting in line at one of the stalls, primarily in large groups of three to four adults and at least that many children. And, to no one's surprise, most of them were dressed up in costumes.

What was surprising to Neil, at least, was the fact he recognized quite a few staple costumes. From clowns to witches and various animals, both real and mythical (though real enough in Equestria). Some were minimalist, like the green mare he saw wearing only a white flower collar with large petals surrounding her head. On the other hand, some were quite complex, like the two-headed chimera costume worn by two foals waiting to bob for apples.

As they walked along the street and swerved around the various groups, Neil momentarily worried that the group's costume preference might draw the ire of some of the parents. But, beyond a few curious looks directed at the pair of lunar guards escorting their group, there was nothing of the sort. He was quick to spot quite a few costumes that were even worse than anything they were wearing, in his humble opinion. One of the mares he saw opted to dress in lacy, vampire-themed lingerie and little else. And, even that was mild compared to the Frankenstein-themed stallion and his glowing, electric green ball-sack. The sooner he could drink away that image, the better off he would be.

At the very least, the only ponies wearing slutty costumes were adults. He counted that as a small blessing.

After they passed through Restaurant Row, Squall turned left down a street that eventually led them toward the Skyport. As far as Neil was concerned, that was the edge of his territory. He never felt the need to travel beyond the port, mainly due to the increased security at all times of the day. The occasional drunk he spotted in the middle of the night, originating from beyond the port, also added to his conviction to leave the area alone.

Squall, ignorant to all of that, simply walked by the Skyport as if nothing was wrong. He even waved to a pair of steel-clad, grey-furred night guards, who continued their patrol without waving back. Silent Wing and Night Wish, his two lunar guard escorts for the night, also ignored the two other night guards.

Now that Neil thought about it, were the night shift for the city watch detachment classified as lunar guards? Or were they still part of the solar guard? Despite the dull material, their armor design mirrored their daytime counterparts.

Before he could delve too deep into that train of thought, he was distracted by something he had never experienced. A faint, if consistent, pulse in the air made his ears stand on end and his fur bristle. However, whether it was a sound he could barely pick up or a steady pressure being blasted into the air for some unknown reason, he couldn't tell. He only knew that it was pretty fast, whatever it was.

As they passed another city block, not only did he feel the increase in pressure as the power behind the pulses pushed past his fur and caused his body to vibrate, but he also picked up the deep, rumbling tremors of bass. If it had only been a little louder, Neil was sure the nearby windows of the buildings they were passing would have rattled in time with the beat.

"We're almost there," Squall told the group as they turned one last corner, though he was looking at Neil when he called out over the bass filling the air. And by almost there, it was clear he meant within view as they transitioned from closed buildings made of brick and stone towards a cluster of five, two-story tall, warehouse-like buildings.

Four of the five warehouses Neil could see were dreary-looking, square wooden shells standing forlornly in the darkness, their almost flat roof overhangs enhancing the shadows. The final building, however, drew in his eyes due to its unique and flashy look. Underneath the purple neon light of a sign that read Star Light's Starbright, he could see clouds of various shapes and shades of purple painted over a deep, almost black shade of blue with metallic flecks reflecting the sign's light.

Below that was a set of large, neon purple double doors, with welcome written across them in silver unified script. To finish the look, standing off to the right side of the doors was a single Unicorn wearing a set of shades and a suit, looking quite bored. As they moved closer, he noticed that the pony was a mare with a fancy-looking lock as an emblem on her flank.

Squall broke from the group and trotted ahead to engage with the bouncer. Thanks to the barely contained music, Neil couldn't hear what was being said. Still, as they approached, the bouncer's horn emitted a faint golden light that was almost overpowered by the sign above her. The door was surrounded by a similar light as it was pushed inward, and the bouncer gestured for them to go in.

Following the group (minus his two lunar guards who broke off to flank the door), Neil found himself in a medium-sized waiting room drowning in reddish-pink light, with plush-looking purple benches on either side. On the opposite side from the doors they had just walked through, there was another matching set, but this time, they had enjoy your night written on them in the same silvery script. Strangely, despite being inside the building, the volume of the music barely increased at all.

The why was answered soon enough when the doors they had just passed through closed behind them. That was apparently the trigger for the second set of doors to slide open on their own, disappearing into the walls as they allowed everything from the raucous cheers and hoof-stomps of the crowd to the music's full volume to assault his eardrums.

Thankfully, they didn't get the total bass onslaught since the song was winding down. High-pitched synthetic sounds carried the majority of the tune, with touches of piano interspersed here and there as they walked into the club.

Contrary to the outside, the club's interior could only be described as sleek and curvy. The booths set against the wall, the tables set next to the swerving dance floor, the bar, and even the lit-up shelves that displayed all the bottles of alcohol, Neil wasn't able to spot a single sharp edge (unless you counted the out of place looking metallic DJ equipment). Everything was curved, rounded, and circular in a wavy fashion. It was as if someone overlaid what they thought was a galaxy on top of a large, round pool and made that into a club. Even the ceiling added to the effect, having been painted pitch black and dotted with small, randomly placed lights of various colors that acted like stars.

As Neil looked around and took in the sights, Squall addressed everyone loud enough to be heard above the music. "I'm going to stop by the bar and come back with some menus. Why don't you all go find a booth to sit in?"

As he was speaking, the bass undertones of the song were slowly building back up, hyping up all the ponies on the dance floor, and plenty who weren't from the sounds of it. Being the tallest of the group, Neil quickly scanned all of the nearby booths he could see from the entrance. Most were taken, but he was able to spot two that were currently unused.

Strangely, both were flanking a booth taken up by another pair of red and blue ponies. Unlike the Brass Bells with Calm and Squall, this time they were both Pegasi judging by their obvious wing gestures. Neil pointed them out to the group anyway. "There's two free booths over there," He half shouted above the music, pointing a hoof in the free booth's general direction.

Bulk and Hearth looked in the direction he was pointing, and upon spotting the booths in question, Bulk gave a firm nod. On the other hand, Calm watched his brother as Squall made his way over to the bar. Still, he followed the group as Bulk took the lead and guided them to the closer of the two booths.

One by one, they sat down as the speed and build-up of the song reached its apex. First to sit was Bulk as he slid to the centre, shortly followed by Hearth, who stayed reasonably close to him. Next was Calm, who slid up next to Hearth, leaving just enough room for one more pony on that side. Neil chose the other side as he slid into the booth. And as he did so, he swore he heard an oddly familiar voice mixed into the song:

~
No chit-chat. Time is candy!
~

Looking over to the DJ booth, he could tell the grey pegasus stallion, whose mane was split evenly between white on his left and black on his right, was having the time of his life. He was shredding three separate disks, two with his hooves and a third with his wing, to the frantic beat he was playing to the crowd. Neil had no idea whether that was the DJ's natural colors or if he dyed himself to match a specific character or costume. But the music was interesting, to say the least.

"So, Neil, what do you think of Star Light's so far?" Calm asked, raising his voice enough to be heard over the music.

He didn't have much of an opinion one way or another yet, but he answered all the same. "It looks nice, at least. But I'll know better when I'm buzzed. What about you two?" He added, looking to Bulk and Hearth.

"I prefer the Brass Bells, myself," Bulk offered with a nonchalant shrug. "It's quieter, makin' it easier to talk."

"I'm not a stallion, so my regular waterhole is the Overflowing Flagon," Hearth informed the group after Bulk finished.

Calm apparently, knew something about the bar she mentioned because he quickly followed up with a question, "Isn't that, basically, the unofficial City Watch HQ?"

"Buck yeah, it is," Hearth proclaimed, sounding quite proud about her regular establishment. However, there was a hint of teasing accusation in her voice as well. "Us regulars don't qualify for a private upper-class bar like the Brass Bells you stallions have."

As they were talking, Neil also watched as Squall broke away from the bar. However, he wasn't alone as a pink-colored Pegasus mare, wearing nothing but a witch hat, a set of spiderweb stockings on each leg, and what appeared to be the pony version of a corset (that puffed up the fur of her chest), followed him from the bar.

"What's this about the Brass Bells?" Squall asked as he approached the booth, beating his brother to the punch.

Bulk quickly filled Squall in as the Pegasus slid in beside his brother, making himself cozy against his sibling. "Hearth was just sayin' how the Bells is an upper-class bar for us elites livin' in the castle."

That earned a laugh from Squall, who quickly corrected her opinion. "Upper-class? You're thinking of one of those chateaus where the nobility sits around all day, acting all high and mighty as they sip on grape juice."

At the same time, the Pegasus mare that followed him waited patiently at the side of the booth. Her one wing shifted back and forth until he saw a set of large, thick, almost cardboard-like menus poke out from under her wing. Once Squall finished talking, she cleared her throat loudly to get the entire table's attention.

"Good evening, and a happy Nightmare Night to all of you!" She greeted in a loud but bubbly voice. "My name is Peach Fizz, and I'm one of the roaming servers tonight. Just wave me or one of our other adorable witches down, and we'll deliver your special brews to you in the blink of an eye."

As she went through her rehearsed speech, though she sold it very well, her wing holding the menus extended and placed them all on the table in a single pile. "Let's see, we have four gallant Gentlestallions," Peach stated as she began handing out the menus.

The first was given to Squall, who eagerly grabbed it with a wing and started looking it over. She worked her way around the table from there. However, after handing out the first three with colorful and fruity drinks showcased on the cover page, the fourth revealed more mundane, traditional-looking drinks, which gave Peach Fizz a reason to pause.

"And a rowdy-looking Cowmare tonight," She finished, sounding slightly confused as she split the last two identical-looking menus. "Pardon me, I seem to have miscounted my menus by one. I'm short a stallion's."

"I'll take that one," Neil called out before the waitress returned to the bar to switch it out for a stallion's menu.

She glanced at the menu, then up at him, giving him an odd look before sliding the menu over. "If you're sure, Your Majesty," She teased before digging out a small pad and a pencil. "Anypony ready to order yet?"

Calm already had his mind made up as he asked for a lime saltini, and the others soon followed as Neil perused the menu. Despite the amount of bottles displayed at the bar, the mare's menu was only half as thick as the other one. Still, there was enough choice to make things interesting, even if he didn't recognize a single drink on the menu. Most of them had fanciful names like moon's desire, radiant flare, or lover's embrace.

He didn't feel any sort of pull to a specific drink one way or another. So, after Hearth ordered a cloudy day, he turned her way. "You probably know more about these drinks than I do. What's the strongest drink you've had?"

"That would be a heat quencher for sure," She told him offhandedly, only for her eyes to widen at the admission before she quickly backtracked. "But, that's only offered during certain times of the year... The strongest drink on the menu?" She asked, more to herself as her aura quickly brought her menu back up to hide her embarrassment. What, exactly, she was embarrassed about, Neil had no idea.

"I'd say the wrench in the gears," She offered after a few moments of frantic searching, though she had an odd look to her as she lowered the menu. "But, it isn't the most pleasant thing. Are you sure?"

"If it hits as hard as it sounds, then that's exactly what I want," Neil confirmed before picking up his menu and looking it over again with more care. He didn't know how he missed a drink like that the first time, but he was willing to fix that mistake.

"If that's everything?" Peach asked, allowing a few seconds to pass before continuing, "Then I'll be right back with your drinks!"

In the end, he found it hidden on the third and final page, mixed in with ten drinks with boring joke names like Ice to Meet You, Greener Pastures, and Sheep Lover. Despite the boring names, however, a few of them looked to pack a serious punch. If the wrench didn't work out for him, he had a few others he could try ordering, at least.

Squall, however, waited just long enough for the waitress to get out of earshot before succumbing to his laughter. "I can't believe- hehe- you offered Neil a heat drink!"

"To be fair, you can't deny how strong they are," Calm lightly chastised his brother while elbowing the Pegasus under his foreleg. "I'm more surprised that Hearth admitted to having one."

"It's part of being a member of the Watch, and I'll leave it at that." She stated with a hint of finality. "Besides, I'm sure you castle types have your odd traditions?"

"A few," Bulk conceded before switching the subject to her childhood and the town she grew up in, as the current song's synth tones gave way to one final crash of a cymbal before fading away into the background noise of the club.

The rhythmic stomping of hooves became more prominent, but even that receded with the faint beats as a fair number of dancers slowed down in anticipation of the next song. Some of the dancers, who were strutting on two legs, flopped back to all fours while others appeared to dismount from their dance partners. Only when the DJ stood up to his full height did the sounds of the club become replaced with whoops and cheers for the performance.

However, Neil picked up something else a little closer to his booth when that died down. Another conversation coming from the booth directly behind him, which could only be described as the drunk whining of a high-pitched stallion. "-Ut mares are so adorablllllle! I just wanna hug 'em, and snug 'em, and nibble on their cute little eeears!" The stallion wailed before trailing off to a whimper.

Not that the relative silence lasted long before the second stallion sitting behind him spoke up with a slightly deeper, calmer, and smooth-sounding voice. "And that's why we're here, Open. There's plenty of mares out dancing in their adorable Nightmare Night costumes. We just have to find you the right one tonight."

"But, most mares just wanna suck me off," Open lamented, "Or scratch their itch with a quick buck. Nopony wants to snuggle afterwards... I'm sorry, Crimson. You could be enjoying time with your marefriend, but instead, you're stuck here with me."

"Well, that's where you're wrong. Mid's on patrol tonight, so I only had two options. Either I dragged you out for some fun and drinks, or I could have bought whatever lacklustre candy the shops had on sale after my shift and give that out to the foals. You know I don't do lacklustre, Open."

"Yeah, I know. You're so pretty, and rugged, and cute. It's no wonder why you found a great mare like Midnight. Knowing you, Crimson, you'll find a whole-" Unfortunately, he couldn't catch everything Open said due to the DJ earning a rousing cheer from the dance floor. "...A single mare willing to snuggle with me," He finished, sounding quite sad.

"Honestly Open Air, all you need is a little more confidence, and you'll find yourself a wonderful mare. And yeah, Mid might have asked me to scout another potential member for our herd, but tonight is all about finding a cute mare for you," Crimson encouraged, with a firm slam of his glass against the table. "So let's finish up our drinks, and-"

"Here you all go!" Peach Fizz chirped, drawing Neil's attention back to his own booth. She had a platter with five distinct-looking drinks balanced on her back, which she deftly removed with a single wing before sliding it onto the table.

"First, we have a saltini for the striking bard," She offered, passing a slightly curved martini glass that was two hooves wide over to Calm. It was nearly filled to the brim with a bright green liquid, leaving only a few millimetres of the glass, inside and out, covered in light pink salt. Once Calm accepted the glass with his aura, she quickly passed out all the other drinks.

Bulk ordered the same looking drink he had at the Brass Bells, a Manehatten Skyline from what Neil could remember. Squall ordered a big glass that was half ice and half what looked to be pure iced tea, only it was called an amber chill. Hearth's cloudy sky was a cloudy grey liquid that almost matched his coat served in a regular-sized whisky glass, but it also had streaks of a sunny yellow... syrup somehow stuck to the inside of the glass.

As for his drink, it was an even darker grey, almost metallic-looking liquid, served in a goblet nearly twice the size of Hearth's drink. As he took it from Peach with his wing, he noticed not only how slowly the drink swirled in the glass, making him think of a thick, almost viscous oil, but that there were also little silver flecks of something in it that reflected light. In the end, he concluded it wasn't the most appetizing-looking drink on the table as he placed it down on the table in front of him. Still, he ordered it, so he wasn't going to pussy out.

Before he could build up the nerve to give it a taste, Bulk lightly prodded him with a hoof just underneath his shoulder guard. "It ain't right to eavesdrop on others, you know that, right?"

"Yes, I know," Neil stated unrepentantly as he intentionally rolled his eyes. "Call it a force of habit after spending entire days just sitting and listening to ponies as they walk by. You learn some interesting things."

It looked like Bulk was going to chastise him some more, but Hearth cut in before him. "Wait, how in Celestia's sunny flanks did you manage that? We would have been drowning in unknown Alicorn sightings if you were that close."

Neil's first urge was to dismiss or outright ignore her question. However, he took a moment to actually contemplate it. What did it matter if he told them how he did it? It wasn't like he was planning on returning to the streets of Canterlot if he had to abandon his current position. He had multiple leads he could follow up on, most of which were outside of the city.

"Simple. The Skyport we passed on the way here?" He reminded them, gesturing his head in the vague direction of that particular business, "I took empty crates from there and placed them near alleyway entrances. That way, I could sit and gather info all day and watch places like Donut Joe's to know when it was safe to grab a meal."

As Neil finished explaining, Calm placed his drink on the table and asked, "What do you mean by grab a meal, exactly?"

"Dumpster diving," He stated bluntly, much to his amusement, as all the ponies turned a little green, except for Calm, who was looking at him intently. "What? Do you really think I would break into a place like Donut Joe's and bring all of you down on my head? I was trying to keep a low profile."

"That would explain why Private Echo found you in a dumpster," Hearth admitted before taking another sip from her drink. "I thought you were just trying to hide from something."

In a sense, that was precisely what he was doing. He was trying to hide from an entire city full of alien ponies, of which he was now a member of. Only, it was with his crates instead of dumpsters.

Before that thought could infest much deeper into his mind, he grabbed his oily-looking drink with his wing and brought it to eye level. He was here to lose himself and his worries by drinking and trying not to think for a night. And yet, he hadn't taken a single sip. A problem he quickly rectified as he tipped the glass and knocked back at least a quarter of it down his throat.

It was as thick as it looked, and besides the obvious burning of alcohol, the first thing he identified was the taste of something he hadn't experienced since he was a young kid. "Why the hell," He paused, coughing lightly at the metallic taste still clinging to his mouth, "Does it taste like I swallowed a bag of nickels?"

~~~

After Neil managed to down his first drink, Squall quickly informed him amidst giggles that it was mixed with alcohol tailored for more draconic tastes. Upon learning that, he was more inclined to avoid another wrench in the gears in his near future as he hopped around the mare's menu to try other drinks. ice to meet you was a silvery blue liquid that burned somewhat like whisky while also being overly sweet and tasting like blue raspberry. After trying Hearth's preferred drink, he found out the syrup on the inside tasted like mango.

Over the next hour, he even took suggestions from the others at the table. Calm and Squall were curious enough to point out drinks and ask how they tasted once he tried them. After Squall suggested he try a greener pasture, however, he was less inclined to consider the Pegasus' future offers. It was a smoothie that masked any hint of alcohol mixed within while also tasting like a mix of grass and asparagus. Calm suggested a radiant flare, which tasted like an orange creamsicle but had a nice, almost peppery burn afterward.

Was it best practice to mix and match drinks? Definitely, not. But after his sixth uniquely shaped glass, a pleasant, almost hazy buzz started settling into the forefront of his mind. Blurring out and muddling all of his useless, insignificant thoughts that he normally had to actively ignore. It was nice as he relaxed into his seat and allowed the conversation of his guard detail and the music to wash over him.

There wasn't much need to contribute, either. The rest of the booth were comparing the most embarrassing moments in their respective garrisons they walked in on. And, since he wasn't part of the guard, all he had to do was sit back and try not to imagine the scenes playing out in his head. So far, in his personal opinion, Hearth held the crown after she supposedly walked in on five superior officers having an orgy in the showers. However, the fact that she joined in on the action and brushed that aside as an afterthought made him think she wasn't being entirely honest.

Beyond the conversation, he also found the spotlights and colorful lasers catching his eye. They constantly drew his attention to the dance floor as the beams of light cut across and illuminated the stomping mass of ponies. More often than not, he would pick out and watch ponies that were dancing in an almost human-like manner or focus on the DJ's janky tech that looked like it might have belonged to the '70s. Only for one of the ponies next to him to point out that his drink was almost finished and suggest another one.

Neil was halfway through his thoroughly unpleasant asparagus smoothie when he noticed something unusual by pony standards. A new pony entered the club, alone, and dressed up in a black, loose-fitting, full-body cat costume that reminded him of a onesie. He couldn't tell if they were a male or a female pony judging by size alone. Still, due to a noticeable bump from the oversized cat hood, he could tell they were a Unicorn at the very least. And they acted out their costume as they slinked exaggeratedly across the open floor on oversized fake cat paws.

In the end, the mysterious pony chose an empty table between his booth and the dance floor, only stopping long enough for their vibrant green aura to pull the chair out and curve their articulate costume tail into a proper seating position for a cat.

Over the next half an hour, he didn't exactly keep an eye on them but kept them in his peripheral vision at the very least. Something about the way they acted threw him off. They just sat there, sipping on a tall but skinny cyan drink and watching everything around them. Or how they would occasionally fixate on other ponies, they could see from their vantage point.

That included his booth, as he caught the pony's reflective, almost cat-like green eyes staring in his direction no less than twice from underneath their oversized hood over the last thirty minutes.

After ordering a round of refills for the group and a new drink that Bulk had pointed out called a bottom of the barrel for himself, he felt a large enough lull in the conversation to point out the odd pony to the rest of them. "Is it odd for a pony like that to be staring around at everyone else? I think I caught them staring at us at least two times now."

Squall, being one of the ponies waiting for a refill, answered after a snorted chuckle. "It's not odd at all since all of us, excluding Calm, sorry, are smoking hot! Besides, aren't you doing the same thing?"

"He's got you there, Neil," Bulk said, siding with Squall before adding, "But, I saw her prowl on up to that table, same as you. Let it be for now," Were his final words of wisdom before taking a sip from his drink.

Contrary to Bulk's words, however, a waitress stopped at the pony's table with not one but two orange drinks on her tray. Once the pony paid for both and the waitress walked away, they hopped off their seat and locked eyes with his table. Making their intentions very clear, as they strutted over in a very cat-like manner with both drinks held in... her green aura.

Thanks to a spotlight partially illuminating underneath her hood, he knew from the soft curve of her jaw that it was a mare making a beeline to their table. Bulk and Squall were also watching the show, while Calm and Hearth were, at the very least, acting nonchalant about the whole situation.

Once she was close enough, she drew her hood back, revealing a muzzle that was as black as her costume and a vibrant orange mane that was braided and kept flat against her neck. "Good evening, Gentle-Stallions and Lady," She greeted with a distinctly noble accent before her eyes shifted towards his and Bulk's side of the table. "I couldn't help but notice some of you keeping a watchful eye over me. Instead of simply returning the favor, perhaps I could join you this festive night?"

Neil's first inclination was to say no, but Squall beat him to the punch as he spoke up. "Sure! The more the merrier on Nightmare Night, right? Got a name for us, Cutie?"

At the same time, he also noticed Calm giving his brother a look that asked what he was doing.

"My name is Hallowed Eve, which some of you might know." She answered as both of her drinks, which Neil now recognized as solar flares, settled onto the table right next to him.

In response, he not-so-subtly shifted a few inches closer to Bulk.

"I think so?" Squall confirmed, clearly thinking as to where he heard it. "Pretty sure Ripple mentioned your name."

"The Risque and Reward?" She countered and, upon Squall's nod, gave one of her own. "I would hope so if that is where you went costume shopping. After all, I made three of the costumes worn at this very table."

Before anything else could be said, the back edge of her costume lit up in her green aura. Initially, what Neil thought to be a fully encompassing body suit turned out to be bottomless, revealing the back half of her thighs and rump from the knees up. It just blended in so well with her fur he hadn't noticed. Still, she pulled the fabric past her thighs, revealing not only a matching orange tail tightly tied up in an almost unnoticeable flat bun, but a familiar smiling pumpkin emblazoned on her hip.

Of course, with her tail done up in such a manner, he easily caught more than a hint of pillowy black flesh, its sheen distinct enough compared to her well-groomed fur. He quickly jerked away, only to catch Hallowed Eve's green eyes looking directly at him.

"At least, almost three of the full costumes at the table," She continued, giving no hint of anger or embarrassment that she caught a stallion peeking under her tail. "I find the alterations to your large friend's Lunar Spear costume quite intriguing. I hope you don't mind if I ask what inspired you to change it, Mr.?"

"Neil," He answered, short and to the point, as he tried to ignore the mild heat building up on his cheeks at being caught. After all, it wasn't his fault she all but shoved her ass into his view.

"It's good to meet you, Neil," She offered, pulling her costume back to its original position. Afterward, she hopped into the seat next to him in a very cat-like manner, claiming it as her own. "Also, I would like to thank you for watching over me while I sat alone," She continued, as her aura covered one of the two drinks she brought with her and slid it in front of him. "A reward for gallant behavior."

'...Am I being flirted with right now?' Was all he could think, considering the mare's bold, up-front actions. It certainly felt like he was being flirted with, though from the opposite side of what he was used to. "Uh, thanks?"

Looking around at the rest of the group, there were some mixed feelings about a random mare joining the table. Calm and Hearth looked the most opposed, though Calm also looked resigned as if this was normal. Squall had a grin of approval firmly placed upon his muzzle. And Bulk was neutral overall, offering a subtle 'it's up to you' type of shrug.

"Sooo, this is Bulk," Neil started, introducing everyone as he tried to fish a proper topic out of the light, alcoholic haze covering his brain, "And that's Squall, and his brother Calm... Why were you sitting on your own and just watching everyone?"

"Good evening to you all, and that's simple, really," She said with a mirthful chuckle before taking a sip of her drink. "For a single night of the year, I have the chance to see my creations move and weave as if they were alive! Whether it be a spooky coven of witches brewing potions or a gallant knight watching over me. Nightmare Night is simply a delight to behold," She finished as she lost herself in her inner whimsy.

"So true. But, do you want to know what's more fun than sitting?" Squall asked as he wove a wing around his brother's shoulders. "Dancing! Speaking of, c'mon Calm. Let's go find some mares to add to our adventuring party!" He begged, trying to drag his brother out of the booth with him.

Begrudgingly, Calm followed, but only after he used his aura to remove Squall's wing. "He's been getting antsy for the last ten minutes. Anypony else want to come along?"

"Yeah, the more the merrier!" Squall cheered, loud enough that he was heard three booths down, judging by the heads turning to look.

"I'm not nearly drunk enough to attempt any sort of p- dancing," He admitted. However, he managed to catch himself before saying pony at least.

"I'm with Neil on this one," Bulk seconded, "If it ain't square dancing, then it ain't for me."

"Go ahead, Sir Squall, and Calm the Bard," Eve confirmed for the group, clearly enjoying the chance to delve a little too deeply into the role-play aspect of Nightmare Night. "We shall watch your backs from afar as you brave the battlefield of rhythm!"

Neil watched as Squall eagerly bounced and bobbed to the dance floor, his mane and tail flailing in time with the fast-paced music. As for Calm, he lived up to his name the entire way down as he sedately walked next to his brother. Once they reached the edge, both of them waited for a lull in the beat, then vanished from sight as they slipped into the crowd. At least, Squall vanished. He could still see Calm's floppy cap moving in time with the mob.

"Miss Eve," Hearth spoke up, drawing his attention back to the booth. "I hope you don't mind me asking, but what are you expecting to happen tonight?"

"Honestly? Just Eve is fine, and I don't expect anything to happen tonight," She told Hearth. "I just want to have a few drinks, enjoy the festivities, and maybe ask Sir Neil about his costume, if he'll let me?"

"Ask about what, exactly?" He asked, suddenly feeling wary about the proximity of the mare beside him.

"Why, the detail and the precision of the enchantments on your costume, of course! I'm no slouch when it comes to making a costume if I say so myself. But, the enchantments can be very fussy at times," As Eve explained, she brought a hoof up to her forehead just above her horn. Once it was there, she started rubbing the spot with a pout.

"For example, a mild sticking enchantment on the prosthetic horn is included with your Lunar Spear costume. If I make the enchantment too strong, the customer risks pulling their fur out when they pull it off. Too weak, and it could fall off willy-nilly. I've settled on a relatively weak enchantment, but it flops around like Squall's horn. Your horn and cloak, though, I can feel the craftsmareship of the enchantments just sitting here," She admitted, her eyes flickering from his cloak to his horn as she mentioned them, only to go wide as she added, "-But only if you want to!"

"Maybe later," He quickly compromised, terrified at the prospect of this random mare finding out about his status... As well as the fact that his cloak was laced with enchantments or wards or whatever the hell they were! Perhaps she could identify what those were.

At the same time, he noticed Bulk leaning into Hearth and whispering something in her ear. After which, they both started scooting out of the booth. "Bathroom break, don' mind me any."

Once Bulk was free, Hearth slipped back into the booth on Neil's side as she pressed against Eve. "I hope you don't mind us mares cuddling up a little and letting the stallions have the other side?"

Eve quickly scooched further into the booth, to the point where she was almost pressed against him as she gave Hearth enough room. "I don't mind at all, Miss Hearth, being an equal opportunity cuddler myself," She all but purred as she joked.

Neil quickly slid himself and his drink down to the apex of the booth's curve, giving both mares all the room they needed as he wondered what was going on. And how did he end up alone, in a booth, with two mares that were being very friendly towards one another?

And, to top it all off, seconds later, a pale lavender Unicorn wearing the club's witch uniform showed up with a heavily laden tray full of drinks held in her bright pink aura. "Pardon me, mares, but is this entire order for the three of you?"

~~~

After that crisis was averted and the drinks were sorted, things calmed down in their little booth.

Bulk returned a few minutes later, apparently refreshed and full of vigor. He quickly slid back in and reclaimed his spot next to Neil. Between him and Hearth, they held a decently long conversation with Hallowed Eve that mainly revolved around her work and what she did in the off-season.

Roughly an hour after that, the DJ stallion finished with a speedy techno song before switching out with a bright green mare who sported a large bubblegum pink afro and looked half covered in paint that reacted with the lights. By that point, Neil's vision was getting a little hazy. At the same time, Squall and Calm returned from the dance floor with a trio of giggly mares trailing them, of which Neil couldn't remember a single one of their names.

All he knew about them was that two were wearing skintight superhero costumes. One was black and based on lightning, while the other was white and purple. The third mare wore a massive green wig, apparently having dressed up as their evil arch-nemesis. And finally, to sit at their booth, they had to pull up three unused chairs from another table. It was hectic, but Neil felt good about himself as long as he had a cup of booze in front of him.

Until he made the mistake of opening up his big, dumb mouth.

"I dunno how to dance," He admitted to the table, and whichever mare had asked him why he hadn't gone to the dance floor yet. It was the truth, after all, and one he didn't mind telling them at the time.

However, girls being girls, they couldn't just let it go as every one of them, except Hearth, burst into excited chatter. Neil couldn't follow as drunk as he was, but he understood a few snippets revolving around teaching him how to dance.

Even Squall joined in on the discussion, "The next song just started, and it sounds pretty slow. That's perfect for beginners!"

That sealed the deal for Squall's three mares and Eve while sealing his fate. With Eve's helpful aura steadying him, he managed to slip out of the booth without making an unsteady fool out of himself.

At the same time, Squall managed to hop out from his side of the booth on his own, and with two of the mares flanking him on each side, he made his way down to the dance floor. Leaving just him, Eve, and the Unicorn mare wearing the lightning superhero suit. Once he felt ready to go, Eve came up on his right, while Lightning Mare came up on his left before escorting him to the dance floor that was less packed at this late hour.

~
If you like the fast lane don't be slow,
'Kuz I'm giving you the green light to go.
~

"Now, dancing is easy," Eve told him, sounding just as drunk as he felt before she pressed the side of her body against his. He might have tipped over just from that if not for Lightning Mare on his left, who also pressed into him. "Just swaaay in time with the music, and tada! Dancing."

~
If you got something you wanna show,
Show it to me!
~

At first, it felt more like he was being shoved by both mares. However, each time he closed his eyes, it was hard not to focus on the music's vibration flowing through him, as well as the mares pressed against him. In two or three blinks, it was starting to feel less like he was being pushed around and more like he was flowing in time, lost in a trance.

A fourth blink and the empty space to Lightning Mare's left was filled by Squall and his two mares. With how close they were, it looked like they were one large group, swaying in time with the slow beat...

Only for the bass to speed up as the DJ mare transitioned to another, faster song. Without thought, the group matched the new pace, sweeping Neil along with them.

The next half an hour, at least, was a haze to Neil. It was a roller coaster ride of fast, then slow, then fast again. At some point, Squall left the dance floor, bringing all three mares and leaving him alone with Eve. Not that it bothered him too much. He was starting to get tipsy in his moves without the added stability. But she was just as drunk as he was, and together, they somehow managed to prevent catastrophe while experimenting with new dance moves they saw other ponies doing...

Only for the current song they were dancing in time with, to suddenly shift into a faster one without any warning.

~
One, two, three, four!
Gimme more, gimme more.
~

The sudden change shocked his mind, giving him an unusual amount of clarity at that moment. Enough for him to note that both of his front hooves were firmly gripping Eve's lower back, even though he didn't know how to hold things with his hooves, and that his extra long codpiece was fully entrenched between Eve's uncovered and decadently plush cheeks. Both were swaying and grinding in time to the new upbeat bass.

Before he could react or pull away from his downright disgusting performance, he heard an unknown female voice whispering clearly in his ear, even with the loud music. "You're such a delightful little morsel. Just a touch of alcohol, and you become a macro head with a micro brain. Oh, I simply cannot wait until we officially meet. But, until then... Farewell, Mon Capitaine!"

At the same moment the voice stopped speaking, he felt a large, scaly something whip against his ass with enough force to topple both himself and Eve. He inhaled painfully, as a stinging, almost searing sensation spread across both cheeks, as Eve quickly pulled herself out from under him.

"Neil, are you alright?" She asked, leaning close to him and steadying him on his belly with her aura. "Are you hurt? Did you pull a muscle?"

Unfortunately, what clarity of mind he had was already gone, replaced with the alcoholic haze he nurtured for most of the night. "Maybe," He muttered, trying to remember exactly what happened and somewhat failing, "I think I'm done dancing f'r the night, though."

"That's fine," She said, wobbling as she stood back up. Then, with her green aura, she helped him up as well. "My legs are starting to feel a little sore, too. You're really big, y'know?"

Author's Note

Who knew Ponies had such a simple calendar? 6 days a week. 5 weeks a month. 3 months in a season. Four seasons in a year. None of this messy 28-31 days a month mess, eh? ;P

.... I was this close to calling the chapter Mares Like Big Balls. because I'm an immature idiot.

P.S.- Really worried this chapter is where I jumped the shark.