My House Is Now A Pocket Dimension And My Front Door Is A Portal To Equestria

by TheGuyWhoDayDreams

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Main 6, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Profanity, Adventure
Length: 26670

I was just living my life until my house became a pocket dimension and my front door is a portal to Equestria. Now I have to deal with ponies that don't have the best track record when it comes to other species.

I just can not believe it.

I was waking up from bed thinking its another tuesday until I realized my house becomes a pocket dimension.

Trying to understand what's going on I open my front door and was shock to find out my front door is a portal to Equestria.

Now you may wonder what's Eque- nope not going to bother explaining, this adventure of mine is probably being written by some random kid and being posted on a mlp fanfic website.

Now I may be a brony and for most people it would be a dream come true.

Honestly when I found out, I was angry and scared.

I am angry because I was taken away from my home, my friends, and my family. And also the fact that out of anyone it could've happen to, it happened to be me.

And I am scared, which I do not show on the outside. Because unlike others who portrait ponies as loving and understanding with very little flaws.

Like any living beings there's no such things as flawless, I am forced to live in a pony's world that freaks out on anything outside of their species and understandings, and since I am the first human in equestria it is not a good sign. Who knows? I will probably be accepted but I will most likely become an outcast at best or a monster that needs to be destroyed at worst.

That doesn't mean I am going to stay cooped up at my home. I wanna live, I wanna explore, I wanna understand where I live. Because 9 times out of 10, most likely I can't get back home.

If I can't get back home then I'll have to adjust living here.

Who knows what I can do here? maybe I can help teach these ponies how to interact with other species.

If there's hope for them anyways...

Somehow this random story I daydreamed got featured on 12/8/23. Well I am putting it here as a trophy like other writers do.

Published 2023-08-11 15:50:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-09-04 14:30:08 UTC

Chapter 1: I Regret Not Having A Back Door

Its another beautiful day in equestria. Birds are singing, flowers are blooming.

A yellow coat and pink mane pegasus is doing her usual routine. Feeding her animal friends breakfast.

Passing by her window she looked outside for a moment only to pause.

Outside her window there's a wooden door in the middle of the field. Then something compels her to investigate, so after feeding them she went to investigate.

Once outside she cautiously walked up to the door. Its large, around twice as high as she is. Its design is something she never seen before.

Standing infront of the door, she has this extreme urge to knock on the door. She wasn't sure why but she have to knock on it.

Lifting her hoof on it.

She knocked on the door.

A bright light shines through my windows.

I wake up on my bed as I yawned. Extremely exhausted but I have to get my lazy ass up somehow.

‘Welp, its another tuesday.’

I got up and went to the bathroom and brush my teeth, wash my face and take a shower.

After changing to my work uniform I prepare breakfast. Eggs and toast.

Sitting at the dinner table with breakfast on the table, once I was fully awake I begin to notice something.

The light shining through my windows.

Or the fact that I can't see anything through it.

Its completely whiteout.

‘The hell is going on outside?’

I tried to open the window, but for some reason it was jammed.

I tried the other window, jammed like the previous one.

In fact I went through every single window in my house and all of them are jammed.

Every window is whiteout as well.

‘This is strange.’

I went to my garage to get my pry bar and once I've return with it I attempt to pry open the window beside the front door.

It could barely lift off the ground. It was progress but an extremely little one.

After a few minutes I lean against the wall, exhausted. The pry bar laying beside down.

It was jammed so tight that I swore that the pry bar bend little.

I begin thinking that this is a dream. Every single one of my windows are whiteout and jammed.

But I remember that I hurt myself a little trying to pry open the window.

This isn't a dream.

This is some screwed up shit like I am in some movie.

I then try to break open the window.

I used a hammer, bounced off and hit me in the face. Use a drill, didn't make a dent. I try to heat up the glass but it didn't feel hot to the touch, it wasn't absorbing any heat.

I was about to give up until.

I hear knocking from my front door.

I mentally slap myself that I forgot about the front door. Can't open or break the windows so why not try the front door.

There's also someone knocking on my door, which means someone is outside.

I got up and stand infront of my front door. I slowly grab the knob and twist it, then I pulled it open, wanting to find some answers.

What I saw outside my front door made my jaw drop.

It was a familiar figure. A character from a TV show I love to watch even today.

The yellow color and pink mane pegasus, Fluttershy.

Outside my front door I saw a bright blue sky with beautiful greens, I can see her cottage from the show behind her in the distance.

We both just stare at each other for awhile completely wide eyed and jaw hanging.

“AHHHHH!” I scream as I lift my arm to point at her.

“AHHHHHHHH!” she scream back lifting her hoof to point at me.

We both have a screaming contest for a few minutes. We only stop screaming when we needed to catch some air.

We both sat at Fluttershy's couch at her cottage. It took awhile but eventually I got her to calm down, she still shy but that's to be expected.

Fluttershy is half as tall as me, have to crouch under her door to get in.

We both just sat there, only taking a moment to look at each other.

“So, uhm. What are you? I never seen a creature like you before, if you don't mind me asking?” She first broke the silence.

“I am a human, I doubt you will see anymore of my kind Fluttershy.” I replied to her. She was taken aback when I said her name.

“H-how did yo-”

“I know alot more than I should, don’t plan on keeping it hidden. By the way my name is Jumper.”

“Ni-nice to meet you Jumper, what do you mean by you are the only one?”

“Well I have been taken away from my home without warning, so far away that it is unreachable. We aren’t meant to be here, yet here I am.” I said with a casual voice.

“You don’t seem too bothered by it.”

I shake my head. “Oh no, I am angry, I just didn’t show it. The fact that out of anyone that could have happen to, it was me. Now I am in this place, returning home to my friends and family will be difficult if not impossible.”

“Oh you poor thing.” she said as she hugs my arm.

“Sad I know, but crying in the corner is a waste of time. Guess I have to make due living in this place until there’s something that can return me home, there’s a chance, but if its impossible well sucks to sucks.”

“Well, why don’t I introduce you to my friends and everypony in Ponyville, Jumper?” she said smiling at me as she got off the couch.”

“Uh yeah no” I immediately decline. She was slightly taken aback from my immediate refusal.

“W-why not?” she asks.

“Not to be rude to you, but you ponies don’t have the best track record when it comes to other species.”

“W-what do you mean?”

“I know alot about you ponies, and I know that you ponies are pretty terrible when it comes to thinking about other species.” I said as I point my thumb to my chest.

“T-they can’t be that bad.” she said as she lowers herself and her ears droop.

Remembering one scene in a fanfic I ask. “Has there any incidents between a resident and your animals?”

“... Well, Roseluck got scared by Harry and called the royal guards on him.” she rubs her hoof with her other hoof.

“So who’s to say that can’t be me as well in that situation. I am a species that no pony has ever seen before. At best they will treat me as an outcast, at worst I will be labeled as a monster that needs to be hunted down and killed.” Fluttershy's eyes went wide at that last sentence.

“We ponies will never do that!” she frantically said. Her tone still weak.

“You will never do that, you’re to kind. Despite you ponies preaching about peace and harmony, you ponies are still capable of violence. Its easy to forget moral values if you are filled with fear and hatred.” her eyes look at the ground trying to process what I've just said.

“Look I am not trying to change your views, but can you do one thing for me?” she looks up at me. “Keep my existence a secret, it may cause mass panic and I will be completely fucked over” she flinched at my use of the F bomb, looks like swear words do exist, just frowned upon. “Not even to your friends, maybe Pinkie Pie but still. Especially your foolhood friend Rainbow Dash, the moment she sees me she will fight me, you know she is more brawl than brains. I don’t want to die by her when she crush my head by how fast and hard she punches.” her eyes wide with horror.

“Rainbow will never kill anypony...” she said weakly.

“I know she won’t, but unlike most creatures I am fragile. She will accidentally kill me, you definitely don’t want to have your friend suffer a traumatic experience when she realizes she murdered someone.”

She stay silent before nodding. “Ok, I promise I won’t tell anypony about you Jumper.”

“That's all I can ask. As much as I hate leeching off you, I really can’t get a job in a pony’s world without getting instantly reject because of my appearance.” I got up from the couch. “I am going to bring my front house over here, I don’t think its attached to the ground. It will be pretty strange to see a random door in the middle of nowhere.” I left her cottage to retrieve my front door.

Thinking about it, its like my house became a pocket dimension, only seeing a white void from the outside and not hearing the usual car noises they make.

Electricity and water still works. Not sure about the internet service though, I'll have to check on that later.

Damn it, out of all the places I could be in. I could be in the world of pokemon, instead I am in Equestria, a man living in a pony's world.

They are racist really. And the people who say that wanted to live there don't take that into account.

I know eventually my existence will be found out. This is fucking Equestria, land of magic and coincidences.

I am curious about other places in Equestria though, like Baltimare, or some other place not mentioned or seen in the show. Home is a priority but if I can't go back home then I'll try to explore Equestria.

Of course after I learn about stuff from this world, the show doesn't show everything so this is a precaution.

Still mentally angry from being taken away from home. But knowing how these work I just have to accept it, crying about it is just a waste of time and makes you look like an idiot.

I won't lie that I am scared on what will happen to me in the future. But knowing Equestria I will have to face them eventually.

Its getting dark and Fluttershy just finish all her chores for the day. I tried offering to help her but she insist she will do it as I have a rough day.

I put my front door in her living room beside the stairs, I am surprised that I can even put my tall door inside her cottage at all.

I am lucky to be found by Fluttershy, if it's anypony else I probably wouldn't have made it this far. I thank to the gods for that.

She was already asleep for tonight while I just stare at the moon. I notice the moon still has the shape of a mare on it. Nightmare Moon is still up there.

It seems the first episode haven't happened yet. I doubt I will care about preserving the timeline but Twilight and her friends needs to learn all of those life lessons. If I give them the answers they will begin to solely rely on me, that's the lesson Gary Stu learned the hard way.

I decided to tuck in for today. Wondering how am I going to deal with Equestria's unpredictable magic shenanigans tomorrow and the day after, and the day after, and the day after.

...

What if I have just gotten a house with a back door. It could probably be a portal to home if god is merciful enough to give it to me.

...

I regret not getting a back door.

Chapter 2: Hanging Out With Kindness

The sun reaches my bed.

Oh wait, it is the white void.

Interesting thing is that there's a day and night cycle. When I got back to my house the white void outside turns into a dark blue void, though when I looked outside, I swear I saw something in there.

The internet service works. But for some bullshit reason I can't contact anyone. Well at least I can still play video games at my computer and consoles.

Changing into my regular clothes since I am now jobless. I prepare bacon and eggs for breakfast, Fluttershy isn't surprised to learn that I am an omnivore since she takes care of animals that eat meat which I expected it from her. I did tell her some stuff about my world, she is surprised to learn some animals aren't sentient over there, makes sense since Equestria's animals has sentience. Fish isn't off the table since they weren't sentient here, she is happily provide for me, perfectly understanding my dietary needs.

After finishing breakfast and cleaning the dishes, I went to my front door and open it. Looking around I saw that infamous pet rabbit Fluttershy has, Angel Bunny.

Inside the living room there are animals everywhere, some of them stop to look at me curiously before presuming to what they're doing before.

Angel Bunny was glaring at me, making the 'I am watching you' gesture. Already knowing Angel Bunny I decided to just ignore him.

Fluttershy then came out of the kitchen and saw me. “Oh, Good Morning Jumper.” she greeted as she smiles.

“Morning Fluttershy.” I greeted back.

She provided me breakfast, which was bread with flowers and hay. I told her I've already eaten breakfast I made myself while also explaining our inability to digest hay and flowers.

“So Fluttershy, since I am in a completely different place I need to learn about the world I reside in. Although I know alot about Its history and inhabitants, I don't exactly know everything. May I borrow some of your books you have in your home?” I asked her.

She nodded. “Of course.” after sometime she gave me every book about that contains knowledge about Equestria, even fairy tales.

Opening the first page on the first book I've grabbed I already see an issue.

“Uhm... I can’t read any of this.” I awkwardly said.

“You can’t read equestrian? But you speak perfect equestrian.” she was confused.

“I forgot you ponies have a different writing system, its equestrian for you but its english for us. Same language but a completely different writing system.”

“Oh, I can help you out.”

“Much appreciated Fluttershy, let me go get my alphabetical table. Should be somewhere inside my house.”

We spend a good time learning how to read equestrian, we made good progress but I am still a little rusty. She still has chores to do but I was happy to help her out.

After helping her with her chores, I just sit in middle of her living room doing nothing. The animals just observe and climb my body curiously, I don't mind.

Angel was just staring at me, I honestly just don't care.

I look to the direction where my front door was placed. I saw various animals looking at it curiously, they know that I came in and out of this door and are very curiously to see what's behind there.

Since I have nothing to do, I decided to let them explore my house abit. I politely asked the animals to get off me and as they did, I got up and walk up to them.

“You are curious about what’s inside my house aren’t you?” I said to them as I look down on them, they nodded their heads. “Well just for this once I'll let you, just don’t touch my stuff you understand?” they nodded in acknowledgement as I open the door for them.

They flood to my living room as I watch them making sure they don't fuck anything up.

They look curiously at the various devices and items that they never seen before.

Some went to the kitchen, I make sure to pay them more attention as to make sure they don't get themselves hurt or set my kitchen on fire.

Some tried to explore up stairs but they have difficulty climbing up the large stairs, they soon stop as it wasn't worth the effort.

I was surprised when I turn around to see Fluttershy at my doorway.

She rubs her hoof along her mane. “H-hey, sorry to intrude but I am a bit curious about what’s behind your door if you don’t mind?” she ask shyly.

“Sure, come on in, I don’t mind.”

She begins to look around my living room, she is looking at the TV curiously. “Uhm, Jumper what is this big rectangular black box?” she ask me.

“Its a television or TV for sure, since I know your technology is far less advanced than humanity I will explain it in a way you can understand as best as I can.” I clear my throat. “Its a device that allows you to display moving pictures and make sound. It allows us to entertain ourselves or listen to news, a device like this can make news spread very easily as most household have at least one.” no surprise that Fluttershy was impressed.

“Oh and uhm what about this thing.” she said as she points a hoof at my nintendo switch.

“Its a game console, think of it as an arcade machine but far more advanced. You can play games on this bad boy. Let me show you.” I decided to give her a demonstration,

I turn on the TV and prepare everything for the game. Meanwhile Fluttershy found my beanbag, curious she sits on it. She melts in bliss from how soft it is.

After I finished setting on everything I booted it up, making sure its on tv mode. The animals got curious and went to sit on the crouch, the floor or on my beanbag, they all melt in bliss as they sat on it.

I showed them Fall Guys, don't ask me why I have it, its a good game.

After we finished they all leave my house, Fluttershy ask me if I have any of those beanbags I have when I told her. I let her borrow the bean bag from upstairs since I barely use it anyway which she places it at her living room.

I grew a bad feeling about giving her my bean bag however.

I just shrug it off as I decided to go on my computer to do some stuff.

I think around an hour later I got a frantic knock on my door.

“Coming, coming.” I said as I open the door to see Fluttershy.

She looked like a mess, her mane is ruffled and she was snatches all over her. “Jumper, you got to help me! my animal friends are fighting over the bean bag you gave me and I can’t calm them down!” she frantically said, I go wat?

I looked around to see a messy living room, animals were fighting everywhere with some choosing to stay out of it. I see Angel Bunny trying to defuse the situation with no luck. In the middle of room I saw the beanbag.

My jaw just drop, a fucking bean bag cause all of this. The living room looks like a battle field.

I went to my garage and find my megaphone. I know there's a risk of someone hearing from outside but I don't fucking care at this point.

Stepping into the battle field zone, I pull my megaphone with max volume and shouted. “CAN Y’ALL FUCKING STOP RIGHT FUCKING NOW!” I shouted. All the animals and Fluttershy covered their ears from how loud it is, they all look at me.

I pull the megaphone away. “Never in my life I’ve seen someone starting a war over a bean bag, I am taking it and locking it away. Ain’t no way you are starting a fight just for one bean bag” I said as I take away the bean bag to be locked away. All the animals that participate in the fight look down in shame as Fluttershy scolds them for fighting over something like this.

I can see Angel Bunny really pissed off that this happened and looking at me. Yeah I feel like something is going to happen between us.

I make a mental note to never give bean bags to anyone again. And if I did it probably is going to be sold to the public seeing how addictive it is, so much that they can start a war. If I do plan to sell bean bag, it should be mass produce to meet the demands as I don't wanna cause mini wars across the country because they can't share.

Tired of this bullshit I went to sleep early.

Chapter 3: Jumper The Human And The Bossy Rabbit

“Alright Jumper, I am going out for some errands, I trust you will be ok doing the list of chores I’ve given you?”

“Its alright Fluttershy, nothing to worry about.” I said to her, giving a thumbs up.

Its been a week since I first arrived in Equestria. Other than the bean bag incident it has been smooth sailing, well Angel Bunny is being a dick but besides that.

Thankfully no other pony heard the loud shouting I made using the megaphone.

Me and Fluttershy grew closer, the more time we spend with each other the less I see her as a fictional character. Also I've learned how to read, there is some interesting things about Equestria, there's a section in the book of creatures called jakhowls which is basically Riolu and Lucario from pokemon, to bad they are last seen centuries ago.

Some of the fairy tales are what I expect from ponies when thinking about other species.

The stories about giffions being greedy robbers while the stories about dragons raiding and destroying towns, granted they were true a long time ago but in the current era of civil times, these stories will probably do more harm than good.

I share some of my opinions about this with Fluttershy, I did tell her about the mare on the moon but she is convinced its a fairy tale, I didn't press on any further.

Speaking of the mare on the moon, the summer sun celebration starts at the first day of next month. I will probably not interfere but this is Equestria I will somehow get involved one way or other.

Right now Fluttershy has to leave her cottage to go to Ponyville and do some errands, she is confident enough that I can help her with her chores while she was gone.

“Oh! And I ask Angel Bunny to help you out with your chores to.” I just look at her.

“You do know that Angel and I didn’t get along, he is still angry about that bean bag incident a week ago.” I nonchalantly said.

“Well... I thought that maybe both of you will bond when you both are helping out doing chores together.”

“Knowing him I doubt it, but I will give it a shot.” she smiles at him.

“Thank Jumper, well I'll have to go now, good luck!” she said as she leaves.

Looking around I saw Angel on the floor, crossing his arms and holding a list of chores Fluttershy gave him. I could tell that he didn't want to do this but for Fluttershy's sake, he'll do it.

I turn to look at Angel with a neutral expression. “Alright Angel, lets get these chores done, I know you don’t like me but Fluttershy gives us responsibilities to do while she is away. Try to keep your behaviour in check until we have finished or Fluttershy comes back ok?”

Angel just sighs and nods, agreeing with me for once.

We did the difficult tasks first, starting with the first, cleaning Harry the bear's pen. I don't mind since I know Harry is a softie and Harry knows I am no threat, Angel doesn't want to be anywhere near it so he does the second most difficult task.

After doing all the difficult tasks the rest are a breeze to go through, I didn't talk to Angel that much and vice versa for him other then for occasion assistance.

Halfway there however an incident happen, a random animal decided to be a mischievous fucker by randomly finding an air horn and make a sudden loud noise outside while we are tending the plants, so loud and sudden that it scared off the chickens. One of them fucking leap over the fence and took off to the Everfree Forest in fright.

We looked at the chicken as it left out of sight, then we turn and glare at the animal with fire in our eyes for adding another task in our list and is none that we both enjoy; retrieving the chicken from the forest and back to the chicken coop before Fluttershy gets home.

And the animal with an air horn? Lets just say we don't go easy on him.

We both stand infront of the Everfree Forest with grumpy looks on our faces as we know this ain't gonna be fun.

I turn to look and Angel who was standing beside me looking into the forest. “Alright Angel.” Angel turns his head to me. “We both know this isn’t going to be a good time, the moment we find this chicken we immediately dip the hell out ok?” I said as Angel nods in agreement.

We enter the forest hoping to find that fucking chicken. We search for a few minutes as we keep our attention high. I know there's a cockatrice here so I have to be careful.

We both then hear rustling in the bushes, we turn to the sound and found the chicken running out of the bush and towards us, it wasn't alone however. Also coming out of the bush was a giant ass snake chasing the chicken, both of our eyes went wide before I grab the chicken in my arms as we both make a break for it.

We manage to make good distance from the snake, Angel was a surprising fast runner when he needs to be.

However we were block when a timberwolf came out of the side and land on the road and face us, making us stop on our tracks.

The timberwolf growled at us but its interest is mostly at Angel. The timberwolf turns its attention to Angel before pouncing on him as Angel close his eyes.

Quickly I stepped infront of Angel and it took a bite on my right arm. I yelled in pain.

Angel opens his eyes when he heard my scream of pain to see me taking a bite for him.

“Don't fucking stand there! Go!” I yelled at Angel.

However seeing this display, instead of running away he jump and kick the timberwolf in the jaws as hard as he can.

The timberwolf releases my arms as its jaw falls apart. I immediately punch him in the face before running away with Angel behind me.

The timberwolf's jaw reforms as we left but before it could follow us, the snake from before attack the timberwolf.

We manage to exit the forest as we both panted from exhaustion. I return the chicken to its coop before returning to the cottage.

When we return to the living room, Angel was just looking at me as I held my bleeding arm. I know what he was asking.

“You are wondering why I save you despite you being rude to me and being a dickhead? Well to tell you is that you aren’t really bad, your attitude is terrible but you did it to act tough and protect Fluttershy from dangers and creeps. To put it short, you are not a demon like others say, you are just overprotective for Fluttershy, even if you do act a bit like a bully to everyone at times.” I tell him, he was taken aback by what I said as a smile forms a bit.

“Also we shall not speak about what happened to Fluttershy ok?” Angel nodded.

“I am home!” in a cruel twist fate, just as I said that she returns home. “I hope everything is going weell-aaahhhh! She screams as she saw my bleeding arm.

We both stare back at her in horror before she frantically flew over to me and examine my arm. “Oh my goodness! What in Celestia happen to you!?”

Welp we both have some explaining to do.

Well one thing happened today. I think me and Angel Bunny will get along sooner or later.

Author's Note

Just assume you will find references to other fanfics in this fanfic.

As well as future chapters when they get more significant to the plot then just sayings. Multiverse bullshit.

Short: Discovery By Laughter

Its been 2 days since the incident, my right arm has been bandaged by Fluttershy since I wasn't exactly keen on going to the ponyville hospital.

Fluttershy was extremely concern for me when she saw I was injured. She wouldn't let me help her with the chores until my arm was healed, probably in weeks I think.

Me and Angel started to bond a bit, he is still a dick just lesser than before.

Sitting on her couch, basically doing nothing but staring into space. Fluttershy is busy practicing her bird choir for the upcoming summer sun celebration.

I just sit there, until randomly my mind comes up with a funny joke that was hilarious as shit that made me laugh out loud.

“HaaaHAAAAHAHAha...ha.” I calm down soon after.

...

Why do I feel something is going to happen?

Outside the cottage Fluttershy was doing practicing her bird choir since she was in charge of music for the summer sun celebration.

She got startled when she heard laughing inside her cottage, she recognises it came from Jumper.

She isn't the only one to heard it however.

“What is that?” says the pink earth pony when she suddenly come out from under the bridge, scaring Fluttershy.

“P-P-Pinkie Pie!” she said stuttering.

“Who is laughing inside your cottage Fluttershy? I don’t recognise that voice at all. Meaning it must be a new pony! I don’t know why my pinkie sense didn’t work though, but once I find him I am going to throw him the biggest welcome party for him ever!” she exclaimed as Fluttershy eyes went wide remembering what Jumper promise her.

“Uh uhm, that’s great and all but... give me a second.” she said as she ran to her cottage.

I jumped when Fluttershy rushed in and slam the door behind her.

“Fluttershy? What’s wrong?” I ask her.

“Uh uhm, Pinkie Pie may or not found out about you and is trying to find you.” she said with a nervous smile.

... Well its not like I expected to be hidden forever but I don't think I am ready for that yet.

“Ok ima just hide in your closet.” I said as I went to hide in the closet.

Ok I am now hiding inside the closet hoping Pinkie won't find me, knowing how Pinkie can warp the laws of physics and her determination, I doubt I will stay hidden for long.

I hear chattering from Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie, I hear bouncing as she tries to find me.

Somehow I manage to stay hidden for a like half an hour I think, you would expect Pinkie to find me right about now but no.

And then my brain strikes again.

My brain then thinks about a very funny joke I've heard years ago. I tried my best to hold it in.

I couldn't hold it in.

My ass has been found by Pinkie Pie as she drags me out of the closet after she said 'Found you!'

“Pinkie Pie you can stop dragging me now.” I said as I was dragged into the living room with Fluttershy extremely nervous.

Pinkie stops dragging me in surprised. “Wow! How did you know my name? Are you a psychic?!” she said with her usual cheery voice.

“Yeah, lets go with that.” I sit up.

“What are you? What’s your name!” she asks.

“To answer your question I am human, and name’s Jumper, Pinkie Pie.”

“Let me guess! You came from... from... huh?” that got my attention, I know Pinkie is some kind of reality warper and I expect her to know that I come from any world, but strangely she couldn't.

“Something wrong?” I ask her.

“I... I thought I know something about you but I can’t quite grasp it.” she said in confusion as she rubs her head with both forehoofs.

Later Pinkie left, definitely to prepare me a surprise party for me, I didn't stop her as I know that's impossible.

“I-I am so sorry Jumper.” Fluttershy apologises.

“No need to apologize, its my fault to begin with. Strange, I expect Pinkie to somehow know about my origins but she seems confused.”

“You know, there is something else. Pinkie did say to me that she couldn’t sense you with her pinkie sense.” she couldn't sense me as well?

Today has been strange, Pinkie's pinkie sense and her reality warping doesn't work on me for some reason. Is there something wrong with me?

Anyways there's still that welcome party Pinkie is going to prepare, I expect it to be in Sugarcube Corner. I'll have to go there whether I like it or not.

Welp, time to suit up.

Author's Note

Here's the deal.

If I release a chapter in a day or two, its a short chapter.

If I take longer than that, its probably me having delays or I am making a longer chapter.

Originally this is Chapter 4 but I find it to short to be one, I pretty much struggle how to make this longer so I am making this its own separate category.

Shorts, are to be released when ready.

Chapter 4: Not So Welcoming Party

“Are you sure you want to do this Jumper?” Fluttershy ask in concern.

“Yeah I have to, I don’t expect to hide forever but I am not ready yet. Pinkie’s welcome parties are unskippable, you know that.” I said with a monotone voice.

“I-I will come with you to make sure you are alright, your arm is still injured and the townsfolk are definitely going to be afraid of you...” I can tell she was nervous about this.

“Yeah, which is why I brought something just incase.” I pat one of my pockets.

“Uh, but are you sure the cooking pot on your head is necessary?” she points to the cooking pot I was wearing.

“Yeah I prefer living than dying, I know you ponies are softies but best be cautious. Although I was going to armour up the rest of my body but I got lazy and I don’t think it will be comfortable wearing them.” I tapped the pot on my head.

“O-oh, ok” we left the cottage and make our way to Sugarcube Corner.

We stand on the road over looking Ponyville, we looked at each other for a moment before preceding.

What make our way through the town, its quite and empty but I know its because they're at the party.

I still couldn't help but feel a sense of paranoia and dread however. I feared that some pony is going to jump out and beat the shit out of me.

We made it to Sugarcube Corner, dread and paranoia are in a all time high. We slow climb up stairs to the front door as I pull three fingers up counting the inevitable.

One...

Two...

Three...

We got inside and close the door behind me an-

“SURPRISE!” everypony inside exclaims as the lights turn on. After that everypony except Pinkie Pie went wide eyed at me.

“Fluttershy get away from that thing!” I hear from a very familiar, expected, and annoying voice. I frown upon hearing it.

Already expecting it, I quickly flop to the the floor face first, Rainbow was caught off guard by this as I hear a whoosh and a crash.

I quickly got up and looked behind me. Rainbow Dash crash herself into the front door detaching it off.

She got up and turn to face me. “This time I won’t miss a second time, monster!” she exclaims, ready to charge at me again.

“Rainbow wait!!” Fluttershy yelled out and step in between us.

“Fluttershy! Move out of the way!” she yells at her as she swipe a hoof in the air to the left.

“No, I won’t let you hurt him! He’s my friend!” she yelled out as loud as she can, still low volume though.

“Friend?! How can you be friends with this hairless freak!?” she said in disbelief and points at me.

“I don’t know? How can you be friends with a griffon?” I retort with a neutral expression and tone, Rainbow's was taken aback.

“H-how do you know!? Are you a stalker!?” she narrows her eyes at me.

“He’s a psychic Rainbow, can you believe that!” Pinkie chimed in cheerfully.

“Besides, I was living with Fluttershy for...” I count with my fingers. “Ten days. If I have any intention to hurt her she wouldn’t be here right now.”

“You probably have Fluttershy is some kind of mind control, release her now!” she tries to retort. Fluttershy has shock by her foolhood friend assumptions about md while I just look at her unphased.

“Well for one I don’t have magic, so no mind control.” I turn to Pinkie. “Anyways lets get this party started, you work very hard for it Pinkie, it would be a waste not to try to enjoy it.” Pinkie is pretty friendly when she found me out, so I'll give her parties a try even though the glares at me from most ponies are present.

“Well lets get this party started!” she exclaims as she stands on two hindlegs and holding her forehoofs in the air with confetti flying through the air.

I just stand infront of one of the tables, trying to grab one of the berry punches on the table. Then Pinkie comes up to me.

“Weellll, are you surprised?” she asked, I just keep quite knowing what will my answer would do. “I'll take that as a yes.” she assumes.

Ponies are enjoying this party, but they couldn't find but just look at me. Most of them are glares of hate or fear, although I did note some in the crowd showing signs of curiosity but I don't know who they are. I didn't bother to acknowledge them.

Looking at the corner of my vision I saw the other two soon to be members of the main six, Applejack and Rarity. Applejack was just looking at me with wary and caution, but Rarity's I couldn't read but I assume she will be like Rainbow and the other racist ponies in this town.

I turn to look at them. Applejack pause for a moment before continuing towards me while Rarity didn't even flinch.

They soon stand infront of me, I brace myself on what I expected them to do.

Rarity caught me off guard.

“What are you wearing!?” she exclaims, I am torn between being surprised or unsurprised.

“Uhhhh...” I couldn't even form words, I was so caught off guard.

“Your clothes look absolutely dreadful!” she turns her head to the side and puts her hoof in her temples. “Your coat doesn’t even go well with your shirt, your green pants makes you look like an eyesore, and that cooking pot is for cooking not as a hat!” she finishes as she examines my clothes but only to touch the bandages as I yelp in pain.

“O-oh I apologies, I didn’t see that you are injured, how did this happen?” she ask in a surprisingly apologetic tone.

“W-well an incident happen, got bitten by a timberwolf to save Angel Bunny.” I recompose myself. “To be honest, I thought you are going to call me a brute and some other bad stuff about me.” Rarity was flabbergasted to hear this.

“Now why would I do that!? Besides you saved Angel, Fluttershy is most likely very grateful for that, so you are good in my book. By the way my name is Rarity and this is my friend Applejack, what’s your name mr?”

I manage to form a genuine smile. Applejack is less wary of me now seeing this but still keeps her guard up.

Before I could respond, Rainbow Dash comes in. She flew up to look at me at eye level.

“Let Fluttershy go now.” she said as she tries to be threatening by hitting other hoof on her other hoof.

“Still on about the mind control bullshit?” a frown returning to my face, everypony who heard that flinched and turn to me. Surprisingly I didn't see any children here so I can use that as an excuse to cuss.

Rainbow then narrows her eyes then she starts to rambles on some bullshit she just pulls out. I try to ignore her as I don't wanna cause a scene and ruin this party, I take a swing of berry punch but immediately spit it out from how god forsaken sweet it is.

“Pinkie Pie?” I call for her. She bounce up to me.

“Yes Jumper?” she ask.

“How much sugar did you put in the punch?” she giggles.

“Just the whole bag, why do you ask?” she said it like its the most normal thing in the world.

“... I think I lost my appetite.” I wisely choose to avoid eating any sweets here.

And then I was punched behind the bed, it knocked the pot off my head as it fell to the ground. At least it did its job, I didn't die.

“Stop ignoring me!” I hear Dash said, I turn around to face her.

“Look just stop Dash, people are trying to have fun, and I am just minding my own business. Fluttershy isn’t mind controlled so just stop.”

It didn't stop Rainbow however, she continues making accusations, and other garbage she spews her out mouth. I just stare at her as my patience were wearing thin.

“Just stop please, I know alot about you and the only reason I haven’t lashed out yet is because of Fluttershy, don’t test me.” my eyes started to twitch in annoyance

“Yeah Rainbow Dash, Jumper hasn’t done anything wrong, you should leave him alone.” Rarity said to Rainbow.

“My flank!” retort Rainbow Dash.

She then continues, I take deep breaths, think off a waterfall and just anything to calm me down. I tried to join in the fun but the dance floor is off limits for obvious reasons, there's nothing much to do other then sit down at one of the tables. The glares sent on me are not helping.

Seeing its going to get worse, I try to leave the party but Rainbow pulled my collar.

“Oh no, I am not finished with you!” I reach my breaking point despite my nest efforts.

She lets go as I slowly turn towards her. “You are a coward Dash.” I said in deadly calmness, everypony inside turns to look towards us.

“Me? A coward?” she snorted. “Do you know who are you talking to? I am Rainbow Dash, and I am not scared of anyt-”

“You are scared of the world, Dash.” I cut her off, she was confused. I elaborate it to her. “you are afraid of being ostracize, so you seek to be the center of everything to lie to yourself you are worth something.” everypony gasp as Rainbow's cockiness was wiped off and replace with nervousness with slight fear and sadness.

“You said you wanted to join the Wonderbolts, yet why haven’t you?” I didn't stop there. “You have zero self esteem so you try to be the best and coolest from being in the top of the leaderboard or something else.” she started to back off. “you use it to hide and lie to yourself that have value in your life.”

My face begins to grim, “I never wanted to be here in the first place, just let me leave.” I finished as I turn and leave, not looking at the flabbergasted crowd. I picked up the cooking pot on the ground and left.

As I was a few steps away from the building, Pinkie call me out. “Wait, come back!” she pokes her body out with her hoof to reach attempting to reach me.

I turn to Pinkie with a sympathetic look. “I am sorry Pinkie, I know you are a nice person, you all went through all the effort to make me feel welcome but, its only really a welcome party if they welcome me. I don’t belong here.” I walk away.

As I make my way back to the cottage. I never wanted to be here in the first place, I just wanna go home.

Author's Note

Finally figuring out how to embed images

Chapter 5: A Walk Through Ponyville

I wake up from my bed, my welcome party was yesterday but other than Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie, didn't exactly feel welcomed.

While Fluttershy apologise to me for Rainbow's behavior, she also reprimand me for what happened, I guess my retort is very personal to Dash.

Sigh, I just wanna go home.

As much as I want to go home, I realized until then I have to learn how to adjust living in Ponyville in the meantime.

I decided to go to go for a walk through Ponyville. maybe I am being too judgemental of these ponies, Rarity is an example, I didn't expected her to be kind with me due to her overdramatic personality.

Walking through the streets of Ponyville, ponies either glare at me or just go back to their homes and barricade their doors or something. Yesterday doing that stunt in a middle, terrible idea but fuck you she's annoying.

After an hour of walking and trying to interact with the ponies, with failure. I ended up in a field, choosing to sit down and take a break, getting bored I pulled out my old DS I brought out, made sure it is fully charged.

I started playing Super Mario Bros DS, trying to replay the entire game. It was a blast you can never go wrong with a game like this.

I didn't notice someone was watching me play as I was focus on my game, I noticed their presence when it “woooahhh.” in fascination.

Confused when I heard that, I turn to the direction and notice a very familiar colt from a popular series made by the fans. Button Mash.

“Button Mash, right?” I ask, he jumped back in surprised.

“H-how did you know my name mr?” he said nervously as a sweat drops.

“Pinkie Pie thinks I am a psychic so just go with that.” I shrugged, going with Pinkie's guess.

“You’re a psychic? That's so cool!” he said excitingly as he jumped before landing. “Also, is that a Hoofheld game? I never seen something like that before?” he points at my DS as he tries to get a closer look at it by leaning forward and narrowing his eyes.

“Oh this?” I bring my DS closer to him so he could see it better. “You are right about being a video game console, its called a DS, it stands for Developers System or Dual Screen.” he was surprised to see colours on my DS.

“it has colours!? My GameColt is only in green and black, no other hoofheld games have anything like this!” he said amazed by my DS.

I chuckle. “Where I come from, we are pretty advance in technology.” then I thought of something. “Here, wanna give it a try?” I held my DS infront of him.

“Wow! Really?” I nodded. “Thank you monkey man!” he bounce around in excitement before taking it from me, I'll let the name slide, he is just a kid.

I was having fun watching him playing my DS, I spent a good hour with him. Of course he is to return home, he thank me for letting him play my DS as he runs home.

I feel a little hurt when he mentions home, but besides that I really enjoy my time with him. My most enjoyable moment since ending up in Equestria.

I tried to talk to the ponies of Ponyville, no progress at all, the flower trio fainted by the sight of me, but they pretty much faint at every single thing, I won't be surprised if they faint by their own shadow once.

Sitting on a bench, trying to think of anything to do. A pony comes up and sits right next to me. I turn to look to see a familiar minty coloured unicorn, Lyra Heartstrings.

Despite what the fandom will say, she doesn't seem to recognise my kind. I mean being realistic, it was expected since I am the first and only human in Equestria right now.

She turns to look at me curiously. She sees the way I sit, she then shuffle around a bit before managing to get into a position that started a trend that Lyra loves humans.

“So what creature are you exactly?” she asks as she looks over me in curiosity as if examining me.

“To answer your question, I am a human, or homo sapiens if you want the scientific name. My name is Jumper by the way.” I answered as I point a thumb towards me, smiling.

“Nice to meet you Jumper, I saw you at the party yesterday.” her face then becomes sympathetic. “I am sorry about what happened with Dash at the party though, she is pretty cocky but she means well.”

“Its in the past, no need to cry over it.” I waved it off. “I already know your name is Lyra Heartstrings.” she isn't surprised.

“That’s to be expected from you.” she grins “You are a psychic as Pinkie said, what kind of magic do you have?” she leans her head towards me, expecting an answer.

And an answer I give, though not the one she was expecting.

“None.” that's all I say, she was taken aback and confused as she leans her head back.

“None? Then how do you know so much about us if you have no magic?” she asks, extremely confused about how it is possible.

“Pinkie isn’t on point with her guess.” I turn to look up at the beautiful sky. “Very far from it.” I contemplate whether I should tell her or not, but later I decide against it until later.

We begin to talk about other things, my home, technology, history, basic stuff. She really enjoys talking with me and vice versa, she is really interested to know about me. I think I am shaping her to fandom Lyra at this point.

“Say? why do you not like Pinkie’s parties Jumper?” I was surprised by this question.

“What makes you say that?” I tilt my head and look at her in confusion.

“Well, before you left the party you said that you never wanted to be there in the first place.” she answers. Oh, right that.

“Oh... That’s not what I meant by that.” I said grimly as my head drop to look at the ground. “What I meant is... I never wanted to be in Equestria in the first place.” Lyra's jaw drop upon hearing this.

“Why do you not want to be in Equestria?” she ask in concern as leans closer to me. “Equestria is a great place, what’s not to love about it?” she asks trying to figure out why.

I stayed silent for awhile before answering. “Don’t get me wrong, Equestria can be a great place. Its just that I wasn’t here by choice, now I am struck here with the chances of returning home being very low to nonexistent.” my tone starts to get weaker. “I am now in a foreign land, alone and filled with ponies that judge you base on the fact you are not a pony.” Lyra was dumbfounded from my last sentence.

“Hey! We are not racist, what makes you that?” she taps a hoof on my chest as the distance between my face and her is shorten.

I just stare at her with a brow raise. “Zecora.” I just said. Lyra reeled back before she went over and cover my mouth with her hoofs.

“Don’t say that!” she urgently shushes to me. “We don’t speak of her name here.” she turns to look around me in fear.

“That is an example, besides she hasn’t done anything bad to the town in the times she visits. Y’all didn’t bother to know her, if you had you would’ve known that she was trying to shop around town like any living civilise being.” she was surprised by my knowledge “Tell me that it isn’t racist?” I flatley said. She contemplates before her ears droop as she looks down in shame.

“Well, if you put it like that...” she rubs her hoof when she put the pieces together.

“I guess I shouldn’t go to hard on you ponies, you are a prey species by nature so its instinct to be suspicious of newcomers. Doesn’t change the fact that its inconvenient or detrimental to the other side. It would be difficult to make friends or a doctor will refuse to treat a life threatening condition from you because you are different.” she seem to be deep in thought as we both stayed silent. I thought of something as I smirk and turn to her.

“Well, I gonna go now, I really do enjoy talking to you. Don’t think about what I said to much. See you soon Lyra, good luck with your candy maker marefriend.” Her face turns red hot.

“Me and Bonbon aren’t a thing!” she yells as she jumped, extremely flustered.

“Yeah keep telling yourself that.” I chuckled. We both wave each other goodbye as we went on our separate paths.

As I walk back to Fluttershy's cottage. I thought to myself.

Maybe I can tolerate being here for awhile.

Author's Note

This chapter went through several name changes.

Chapter 6: Mare On The Moon (Friendship Is Magic) [Revised]

Today is the day where the summer sun celebration starts, its also the day where Twilight Sparkle shows up to Ponyville. I was waiting for this day, after all of this I can inform Princess Celestia about my predicament and I have a chance to be sent back home, not going to lie a small part of me hopes that I won't be atomized on the spot.

Knowing what's to come, I am wearing my backpack with stuff to prepare for what's going to happen. I am gonna have to be prepared if I get dragged along somehow, and frankly I want this to be over quicker.

We got invitation to Twilight's welcome party, I am surprised I am invited at all. The letter I received was specifically address to me, Pinkie wanted to make up to me about my first party in Ponyville.

Also my arm got better, I just need to wait one more day before I can take the cast off.

Right now, I am right beside Fluttershy as she directs the bird choir in practice for the celebration.

I've spent some time hanging out with Lyra, talking about hobbies, cutie marks, and mostly about my kind. We got off well. I also hang out with Button Mash on occasion.

Nothing interesting happened after that, although I heard rumors of me being spread across town, I haven't heard any of these rumors besides one about me being a psychic. I am starting to enjoy Equestria a bit, the more time I spent with them and their nature, its beautiful to be real with you.

Haven't seen the rest of Fluttershy's friends ever since the party. They are all preparing for the celebration like Fluttershy.

“Oh my, stop please, everyone.” The birds stopped singing at once. She flies up to one of the birds “Umm. Excuse me, sir?” She address a bird in the choir. “I meant no offense, but, your rhythm is a teeny-tiny bit off.”

“Now, follow me, please. A-one, a-two, a-one two three.” The birds begin to sing again as she directs them with her hoof.

Wait... something's wrong, Twilight should've showed up and interrupt by now.

I turn towards the bush to see a poorly hidden lavender unicorn with a quill, ink and scroll levitating in a lavender glow beside it. I face palmed and sighed, already knowing who it is.

“I know you’re there, I can literally see you!” I point my arm towards her, she yelped in surprised as she dropped everything she was levitating. The birds were scared away as Fluttershy turns towards my direction.

She then came out of the bushes and went up towards us. “How did you find me so quickly?” I face palmed again.

“You should take hiding classes, because you are hiding so poorly. I can see your head and the stuff you are levitating out in the open Twilight.” She give a sheepish smile for a moment before turning to a look of surprised on her face.

“H-how did you know my name?” She asked me in a mixture of curiosity and nervousness.

“Ponies of this town think I am a psychic so just go with that, I know there’s a dragon with you, he can come out now.” Fluttershy yelped in fear after I mention a dragon. Twilight was even more surprised then before.

Spike then comes out of the bushes and approach Twilight, Fluttershy flinched expecting a terrifying dragon. But upon seeing Spike her personality switch instantly as she gasp.

“A baby dragon!” She exclaimed, most of the bird flew away from her excitement as she knocks Twilight away sending her flying to get a closer look at Spike. “I have never seen a baby dragon before! And he’s so cute!”

Spike turns to Twilight with a smug look. “Well, well, well.” He turns back to Fluttershy with a prideful look as he crosses his arms.

“Oh my, he talks. I didn't know dragons could talk. That's just so incredibly wonderful I,” She flies up in the air “I just don't even know what to say!”

Spike was then levitated on to Twilight's back.

“Well, in that case, we’d better keep going.” She said. “I was here to check up on the music for the celebration, it seems to be doing well.” She begins to walk away.

“Wait, wait!” Fluttershy called out and went after them with me following behind. “What’s his name?”

“I am Spike.”

“Hi Spike, I’m Fluttershy. Wow, a talking dragon! And what do dragons talk about?”

“Well, what do you wanna know?”

“Absolutely everything.” Twilight groans after Fluttershy said that. I stayed silent as I walk beside Twilight.

She turns to me while Spike was talking about his life. “Sorry uhm, I never got your name or what you are?”

I turn to look at our keeping my neutral face. “Name’s Jumper, and I am the first and only Human in a Equestria.” I answered her.

“Well Jumper.” She said grin as a quill and scroll appears, oh no. “I want answers about you, your kind, culture, history, everything.” She leans close to my face in excitement.

I push her away a bit, that smiles of hers creeps me out. “We can do that later.”

We just listened to Spike's entire life story as we walked, it was boring but hey the more you know.

Twilight is pretty persistent on getting to know me. She is creeping me out with all of these questions, of course I am pretty persistent on not answering them now.

We are getting close to the Golden Oaks Library. “...and that’s the story of my whole entire life! Well, up until today. Do you wanna hear about today?” Spike asks Fluttershy.

“Oh, yes, please!” She eagerly gallop.

“Gyah!” Spike yelled in surprised as Twilight sudden turn around to face us.
“I am so sorry, how did we get here so fast?“ We looked and see we are standing infront of the Library. “This is where I'm staying while in Ponyville and my poor baby dragon needs his sleep.”

“No I don’t— whoa!” Spike tries to interject but was interrupted when he was toss of her back and onto the ground.

“Aww, wook at dat, he's so sweepy he can't even keep his widdle bawance!” Twilight said with an unconvincing smile at the end as Spike looks at her with an amused look.

“Poor thing,” Fluttershy picks Spike up.“you simply must get into bed...” She flew into the Library before getting kicked out by Twilight.

“Yes, yes, we'll get right on that. Well, g’night!” Twilight quickly said as she slams the door close.

I simply just look at the Library with a neutral look before looking at Fluttershy as she turns to look at me.

“... So the window?” I just say. Assuming that's how Fluttershy got in the Library in the first place.

The party inside the Library was at swing. Twilight shuts herself in the upstairs bedroom like the antisocial she is.

The party goers couldn't really ignore me as I stuck out like a sore thumb, most either tremble in fear or glare at me.

I looked to see Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash approaching me. I look over them in caution mostly because is with them Rainbow who is glaring intensely at me that it made me nervous.

“Oh, Hello Rarity.” I grin nervously.

“Why hello darling, I haven’t seen you since your party.”

“Yeah, by the way my name is Jumper, Rarity.”

“A pleasure to meet you Jumper. By the way I have to ask, why do you wear clothes all the time, I haven’t seen you without one.” Rarity asks.

“Well, we are really against being naked. Since we are pretty much 95% skin we wear clothes for protection and comfort, also being naked is considered public indecency.”

“Oh!” Rarity exclaimed. “You must simply come to my boutique when you have the time to, I really want your measurements.” She said with a creepy look and smile.

“Uh, no thanks I already have my own clothes.” I turn her down. Applejack then approaches me.

“Howdy, I am Applejack.” She greeted. “Though I reckon you already knew?” I nodded as we both shake our hand and hoof with each other, I did detect a hint of weariness from her.

Our conversation wasn't bad, I was enjoying chatting with Rarity and the others. Rainbow just stands there, only glaring with suspicion. I guess whatever happened after I left, her friends, most definitely Fluttershy give her a huge scolding. She may be brash but she knows how to listen to her friends.

Somehow I manage to get dragged into this, now I am standing inside the town hall to watch Celestia raise the sun which won't happen right now because of Nightmare Moon. Thankful the ponies are to busy anticipating for Celestia to glare at me as I am standing right beside Twilight.

“Isn't this exciting?” She zoomed up to Twilight. “Are you excited, 'cause I’m excited, I’ve never been so excited— well, except for the time that I saw you walking into town and I went,” She deeply gasp. “but I mean really, who can top that?”

“Something major that’s going to happen, and I am not talking about Celestia.” I said, Twilight turns to me with a concern look, she knows what I am hinting but she hopes that it was wrong.

Music begins to start as Fluttershy is directing them at one of the balconies as the sounds of horns and trumpets accompanied them. The spotlight turns to shine on to an elderly mare on the stage, Mayor Mare as she begins her speech.

“Fillies and gentlecolts, as mayor of Ponyville, it is my great pleasure to announce the beginning of the Summer Sun Celebration!” The crowd cheers.

“In just a few moments, our town will witness the magic of the sunrise, and celebrate this, the longest day of the year!” I tap my shoes on the floor with a frown on my face, impatient.

“And now, it is my great honor to introduce to you the ruler of our land, the very pony who gives us the sun and the moon each and every day,” Because her sister was banished so she has to take care of both celestial bodies. “The good, the wise, the bringer of harmony to all of Equestria...”

“...Princess Celestia!” Mayor Mare called out as Rarity pulled the curtains back, just as I was expecting she wasn't there.

“Huh?” Rarity said in confusion. The crowd chatters in confusion and nervousness.

“This can’t be good.” I heard Twilight said in concern.

“Remain calm, everypony, there must be a reasonable explanation!” Mayor Mare tries to calm the crowd down.

“Ooh, ooh, I love guessing games! Is she hiding?” Pinkie said, oblivious to how concerning the situation is. Well at least to them not me.

Rarity searched around the balcony before saying. “She’s gone!” The crowd gasps. The ponies around me are asking questions. I can feel some glares being pointed at me.

“Ooh, she’s good.” Then Pinkie yelped and the crowd gasps again as we see a mist forming something on the balcony.

“Oh no... Nightmare Moon!” She said just as the mist forms into a stand black alicorn mare with blue armour.

And then Spike faints off of Twilight's back.

“Oh, my beloved subjects. It's been so long since I’ve seen your precious little sun-loving faces.” Nightmare Moon address the crowd as most tremble in fear.

“What did you do with our Princess?!” Rainbow Dash yelled out, she was going to charge at her but Applejack hold her back by pulling her tail.

She laughs .“Why, am I not royal enough for you? Don't you know who I am?”

“Ooh, ooh, more guessing games! Um, Hokey Smokes! How about... Queen Meanie! No! Black Snooty, Black Snooty—” Before she could say anymore Applejack shoved an apple into her mouth.

She went up to Fluttershy “Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned on the moon for a thousand years?” Fluttershy shy away as the birds flew away. She then went up to Rarity as she was still at the balcony. “Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see th-”

“I know who are you, your Nightmare Moon, aka the mare on the moon.” I cut her off, the crowd gasps for a third time. Nightmare Moons turns to look at me.

“Well well well, somepony who remembers me.” Nightmare Moon said. “And it is a lovely specimen that I never seen before, then you also know why I'm here.”

“You’re here to... to...” Twilight gulps.

She chuckles “Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night will last forever!” she then laughs as a thunder strikes in the background. I pulled a hand across my face, my patience is wearing off.

“Oh my god, just get your fat ass moving dipshit!” Nightmare Moon stops laughing and looks at me as everypony stares at me like I have committed a sin. “I need to talk to Celestia about something and the only way for her to show up is beating the shit out of you.” Hearing my juicy language ponies cover their childrens ears.

“My, my, bold one here aren’t you?” She said as she narrows her eyes at me but I remain unphased by her gaze.

“Seize her! Only she knows where the Princess is!” Mayor Mare shouted.

Knowing the guard won't do shit, I grab an object from my backpack, a bar of soap that I never really use when it was given to me.

I reeled by and threw the bar of soap as hard as I can straight at Nightmare Moon.

“Tell back yo- Argh!” She flinched in pain and held a hoof on her eye.

Either by sheer skill or luck, I manage to hit her in the eye as her attention was focus on the guards.

The guards take advantage of this, they manage to get a hit on her chest before getting zapped away by her.

She turns to me with an angry expression. Knowing who threw it “You’ll pay for that you hairless monkey!’ She then transforms into a mist as she escapes town hall as Rainbow follows her.

I rushed to the entrance of the town hall to see Twilight Sparkle leaving with Spike on her back. I pursue her and I reach the Golden Oaks Library.

I follow her inside the Library and upstairs, she was busy putting the baby dragon to sleep.

Twilight gives him a blanket. “You’ve been up all night, Spike. You are a baby dragon after all.”

“Yet, he talks and acts like a kid.” I said as I roll my eyes. She nodded before her eyes widen surprise before turning towards me, she sighs in relief once she sees it was me.

“Oh, its just you Jumper.” She said she exits the bedroom and went down to the main room as I follow her.

“Well yeah, sorry fo-” My face was then smacked by a book and Twilight Sparkle was careless throwing books everywhere, searching for a specific book.

“Elements, elements, elements... Ugh! How can I stop Nightmare Moon without the Elements of Harmony?” She groan in exasperation.

I pull off the book on my face. “Have you checked under E on a shelf?” Twilight gave me a confused look and she ran over to a shelf that was labeled E. Her eyes widen when she finds a book titled "The Elements of Harmony: A Reference Guide".

“The Elements of Harmony: A Reference Guide.” She read out the title when she pulled it out. “This could work.”

“And just what are the Elements of Harmony?” Twilight turns to see Rainbow glaring us both “And how did you know about Nightmare Moon, huh? Are you both spies? Whoa!” Applejack bites on Rainbow's tail and pulled her back.

“Simmer down, Sally. They ain’t no spy. But they sure knows what’s going on. Don’t ya?” She asks as she and her friends approach us.

“When you told about about the mare in the moon, what you’re saying is actually true?” Fluttershy asks me, I nodded as everypony focus their attention on me.

“Nightmare Moon is Princess Celestia little sister.” Everypony was surprised by this info. “She used to be named Princess Luna before her bitter jealousy manifest into what she is today.”

“That can’t be true can’t it?” Twilight said. “In the tale, it said that two regal unicorn sisters ruled together. I have known Celestia for years, never once I’ve known she has a sister.”

I turn to look at Twilight. “History is written by the victors, some random guy I met said. Its most likely a sore subject for her, thus she probably refuse to tell anypony about it, not even in a story book, not even to her favorite student,” I shrugged. “Now lets get to stopping her, I need to talk to Celestia and she will only show up once she was beaten.”

“I read all about the prediction of Nightmare Moon. Some mysterious objects called the Elements of Harmony are the only things that can stop her,” She flipped through the pages. “Here it is. There are six Elements of Harmony, but only five are known: Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, Honesty and Loyalty. The sixth is a complete mystery. It is said, the last known location of the five elements was in the ancient castle of the royal pony sisters. It is located in what is now...”

“The Everfree Forest!” We all exclaimed as we all now stand infront of the forest.

“Whee! Let’s go!” She cheerfully gallops before Twilight stops her.

“Not so fast. Look, I appreciate the offer, but I’d really rather do this on my own.” I hold my hand up to her.

“You are not doing this alone Twilight, just look at my arm.” I held up my cast infront of her. “I got bitten by a timberwolf in there, the only reason I wasn’t in a worst condition or dead is because Angel saved my ass.” Twilight reeled back “If you don’t have a death wish, let us join you.”

“Jumper’s right sugarcube.” Applejack said “We ain't lettin' any friend of ours go into that creepy place alone. We're stickin' with you like caramel on a candy apple. Even if he’s such a foul mouth.” I huffed at that.

“Are you sure you want to come with us Jumper? Your hand still hasn’t been fully healed.” Fluttershy asks me in concern.

“Like I said, I really need to talk to Celestia. Ain’t no way your convincing me out of this.” I said as we started walking towards the forest.

We venture into the Everfree Forest, while they walk in a single file line, I stay close to the cliff wall as possible.

Twilight decides to speak up. “So, none of you besides Jumper have been in here before?”

“Ugh, heavens no! Just look at it - it's dreadful.” Rarity shivered.

“And it ain’t natural.” Applejack added “Folks say it don’t work the same as Equestria.”

“You mean the fact that the plant life, animal life, and weather do everything on their own.” All four besides Twilight and Rainbow nodded at me. “Its normal to me really.” That got everyponies attention.

“Jumper! How could this dreadful place be normal to you!?” Rarity said to me in horror.

“Well where I live, its like the Everfree Forest except the creatures living here.” I shrugged. “Despite the last time I’ve been here, its feels the most like home out of all places in Equestria. You ponies only found it unnatural because you live in a land of magic. To everyone else in the world, yours is unnatural.”

As I expected, we heard a crumbling sound, the ground beneath them started to fall apart in a rockside as everypony who isn't a pegasus tumble down.

“Fluttershy! Quick!” She shouted as she dives after them.

“Oh my goodness, oh my goodness.” She quickly follows after. I take off my backpack and grab gloves, my elbow and knee pads. I quickly put them on and strapping back my backpack and I carefully slide down the rockside.

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy manage to grab Pinkie Pie and Rarity, looking down I saw Twilight hanging off the edge of the cliff.

“Hold on! I'm a-comin’!” Applejack lets go off a hanging root and slid to down and grab Twilight. I could've helped but Twilight needs this, so I purposely slow my descent down hill.

“Applejack! What do I do?” Twilight exclaimed.

Applejack doesn't what to do until she looked up. “Let go.” She said to Twilight

“Are you crazy?” Twilight snapped at her, finding it unbelievable.

“No I ain’t.” She swore. “I promise you'll be safe Twilight.”

“That's not true!” Twilight was panicking.

“Now listen here. What I’m sayin’ to you is the honest truth. Let go, and you'll be safe.” Applejack promised her.

After a few moment, Twilight decides to trust her and lets go, she screams as she fell only to be caught in both Rainbow's and Fluttershy's hold. Twilight almost slipped out of the hold.

“Sorry girls. I’m not used to holding anything more than a bunny or two” Fluttershy apologises as Applejack climbs down the cliff.

While I am still up here. I am standing on the edge of the cliff looking over them.

“Uh girls?” I exclaimed as they looked above to see me. “Need a little help getting down.” Fluttershy flew up to get me.

I looked at Fluttershy with concern. “Are you sure you can carry me Fluttershy? I am 69 kilograms.”

“I’ll try.” She begins carrying me by grabbing my shoulder as we slowly descent, I can see her visibly struggling. Rainbow just sighs and goes up to help Fluttershy.

When we reach a safe height, I jump down and landed infront of them.

“Alright lets get going.” I started walking when.

“Hold it right there for a second.” Rainbow Dash looks at me in suspicion as I turn to look at her. “When we were walking back on top of the cliff, you were conveniently walking along the cliff wall when a rockside happened. And you prepared knee pads for this.” She taps on my knee pads. “There’s no way you could’ve prepared for something like a rockside unless you already knew about it.” Everypony turns to look at Dash and looks at me. I sighed.

“You’re right for once Rainbow. I did know a rockside was going to happen. I know alot, even the future.” Everypony looked at me in shock.

“And yet ya’ just kept quite about that!?” Applejack said angrily.

“... Sometimes bad things need to happen inorder to get a good ending.” I turn to to continue walking while the rest just looked at me confused before catching up to me.

Everything then went like in the show. Fluttershy with the manticore, Pinkie with the terrifying trees, well for them as I just simply walk pass it as there's nothing stopping me from doing so. Rarity with the sea-serpent Steven Magnet, I use my umbrella to make sure we aren't soaked in water.

Twilight tries to get something out of me since I know the future, but I denied it and said that she will understand soon.

Overall I didn't bother to intervene and make me the spotlight. I just watch them at the sidelines, with some commentary or whatever thrown in.

After awhile of walking, we found it. In the distance we see an old castle ruins across a chasm.

“There it is, the castle of the royal sisters that holds The Elements of Harmony.” Twilight said. “We made it!” Twilight shot towards it.

“Twilight, wait for us!” Applejack said as we quickly follow Twilight.

“We’re almost there.” Twilight then completely falls off the cliff, she was screaming as she falls down to the chasm

This caught me by surprised, acting quickly I dive and using my long arms, I catch Twilight by the tail. I slowly begin lifting her up.

“I did not expect you to fall off a cliff.” I said, Twilight looks at me in embarrassment.

“What’s with you and falling off cliffs today?” Rainbow Dash said as I pulled her to land.

“Blame the writers.” I said, everypony that isn't named Pinkie Pie turns to look me at confused.

“Now what?” Pinkie complains.

“Duh.” Rainbow shows her wings to us.

“Oh yeah.”

“Now that I think about it, why can’t you just carry us over the riverbank by flying.” I questioned. Everypony realize this and face hoofed.

The rainbow mare dived down to the chasm and into the mist. Lifting the bridge and bring it to connect it to the other side.

Speaking of the other side, Rainbow was grabbing the rope-bridge and bring the other side of it to the other side.

“Rainbow...” An unknown voice calls out to her.

“Who’s there?” Rainbow looks around, trying to find the source.

“Rainbow...” the voice repeats.

“I ain’t scared of you! Show yourself!” Hse reels up, preparing to fight.

“We’ve been eagerly awaiting the arrival of the best flyer in Equestria.” The voice replies.

“Who?” Rainbow asks rather stupidity.

“Why, you, of course.”

“Really?! I mean... Oh yeah, me. “Rainbow bragged. “Hey, uh, you wouldn't mind telling the Wonderbolts that, would ya? 'Cause I’ve been trying to get into that group for, like, ever.”

“No, Rainbow Dash. We want you to join us, the Shadowbolts.” Three figures then comes out of the mist. They’re pegasus, wearing black and blue suits “We’re the greatest aerial team in the Everfree Forest, and soon we will be the greatest in all Equestria, but first, we need a captain.” The female shadowbolt said. Rainbow's eyes goes starry-eyed.

The most magnificent...”

“Yep.”

“Swiftest...”

“Yes.”

“Bravest flyer in all the land.”

“Yes,” She chuckles “It’s all true.”

“We need...” The female whisper into her ear. “you.”

“WOOHOO! Sign me up.” She flies in the air in excitement. She goes over to the rope-bridge. “Just let me tie this bridge real quick and then we have a deal.”

“No! It's them or us.” The female Shadowbolt gives her a choice.

“Rainbow, what’s taking so long?” She narrows her eyes to see three figures, the leader notices them and uses magic to expand the mist, blocking our vision entirely. “Oh no. Rainbow! Don't listen to them.” Rainbow cannot hear her from the other side.

“She won’t.” I said as a sweat drops from my head.

“Well?” The Shadowbolt said, waiting for Rainbow's decision.

“You... Thank you! For the offer, I mean, but I’m afraid I have to say no.” She didn't hesitate, as much as she dislike Jumper, she wouldn't let one pony make her ditch her friends. She fixes the bridge and went back to her friends. The Shadowbolts soon after she left, disperse into mist and left.

Rainbow flew back to us as her friends cheered. We walked across the bridge, I was surprised that it can support me.

“See? I’d never leave my friends hangin’. Well, except for you Jumper.” Rainbow gets rewarded by a smack in the head by Fluttershy. And by smack I mean a light tap. We soon manage to cross the bridge and to the other side as we walked towards to ruins of the Castle of the Royal Sisters.

We are now inside the castle, most of the roof is gone, moss and vines everywhere, a few broken windows and several pillars. Pretty much what you expect from a ruin castle.

“Whoa.” Twilight said. In the centre is a monument that held up five stones, five of the six elements of harmony.

“Come on, Twilight.” Applejack said. ”Isn’t this what you’ve been waitin’ for?”

“The Elements of Harmony, we’ve found them.” Twilight exclaimed as she approaches it

Rainbow and Fluttershy begin collecting the stones ”Careful, careful!” Twilight said not wanting the elements to break.

“One, two, three, four...” Pinkie counted them before letting out a gasp. “There's only five!”

“Where’s the sixth element?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“The book said: "when the five are present, a spark will cause the sixth Element to be revealed".” Twilight explained to us.

“What in the hay is that supposed to mean?” Applejack asked, wondering what she means.

“I'm not sure, but I have an idea.” She kneels before the stones. “Stand back. I don't know what will happen.”

“Come on now, y'all. She needs to concentrate.” Applejack lends us outside to wait. Soon it happened.

“Aah!” We heard Twilight screamed.

“Twilight!” They all shouted, we ran back inside the castle to see Twilight nowhere in sight.

“Twilight?”
“What?”
“Where did she go?”
“What happened?”
“What’s going on?” Everypony was worried for Twilight, wondering where she is.

“Twilight, where are you?” Applejack said, worried about her.

“Look!” Rarity pointed at a nearby tower that is filled with light.

“Come on!” Applejack said, we begin running to the tower to catch up with Twilight.

Sudden, we were by shadow looking creatures. They looked like ponies but their bodies are a nightly mist and their eyes are yellow.

I didn't see this coming at all. I'll call them shadow ponies.

“What the!? What the hay are they!?” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. She and everypony turn to me for answers.

“I don’t know, Nightmare Moon probably sent them at me because of what I did back at the town hall.” I assumed. “Just called them shadow ponies but right now we need to get pass them.” I exclaimed.

The shadow ponies came charging at us, we begin to fight. Rainbow dived at them, piercing through them as they disperse to smoke before fading away.

Pinkie grabs her iconic party cannon out of nowhere and blast them, not surprised since she never left home without it.

Applejack was just bucking them with her hindlegs. She knocked one of them into a crowd, vanquishing all at once.

Rarity uh... yeah the last three took care of them before she could do anything. Fluttershy was just cowering behind me.

More shadow ponies begin to appear. There's seem to be to many for them to deal with.

“There’s to many of them! How are we going to get pass them now.” Rainbow said. We desperately try to think of a solution.

I have only one however and I am not sure it will work.

“Uh... I’ll use my secret technique for this.” I said with my backpack off my shoulders as it was placed on the ground beside me.

“Oooooh, I wonder what’s your secret technique is?” Pinkie said with a curious tone as everypony looked at me in anticipation.

I stare at the army of shadow ponies as they prepare for a charging stance. I reach into my backpack and use my secret technique.

“RANDOM BULLSHIT GO!!!” I yelled as I throw a barrage of random items in my bag. Honestly I have alot of junk at my garage so I just lazily grab them anything without thought since I knew that the main six will win regardless.

Everypony was stunned by my epic technique. Even more stunned as the objects I threw are destroying the army as it went through them. Soon they're all dispersed, man they're about as weak as a skeleton army in clash royale.

“That... worked?” Rainbow said in disbelief at my technique that I just pulled out of my ass on the spot.

“Hey, whatever works, works.” I said to them as I picked back up any of the objects I threw that aren't shattered or broken.

We then headed towards the tower and once we reached it, we climbed up the stairs till we finally reach the top. At the top we see Twilight on the floor with Nightmare Moon cackling. The stones broken to pieces and shards around Nightmare Moon.

“Twilight!” All of her friends shouted as Twilight notices us.

“Sorry we are late.” I said, panting from climbing the stairs while carrying my load. Twilight's eyes widen with revelation with a spark when she sees me and her friends.

She stands up and looks at Nightmare Moon with a confident expression. “You think you can destroy The Elements of Harmony just like that? Well, you're wrong, because the spirits of The Elements of Harmony are right here.”

The shards of the elements all glowed and shivered around Nightmare’s hooves and rose up “What!?” Nightmare Moon exclaimed.

“Applejack, who reassured me when I was in doubt, represents the spirit of... honesty!”

Applejack finds herself surrounded by the shards as she floats in the air.

“Fluttershy, who tamed the manticore with her compassion, represents the spirit of... kindness!”

So did Fluttershy.

“Pinkie Pie, who banished fear by giggling in the face of danger, represents the spirit of... laughter!”

And Pinkie Pie.

“Rarity, who calmed a sorrowful serpent with a meaningful gift represents the spirit of... generosity!”

Rarity.

“And Rainbow Dash, who could not abandon her friends for her own heart's desire represents the spirit of... loyalty!”

And lastly Rainbow Tra-

“The spirits of these five ponies got us through every challenge you threw at us.”

“You still don't have the sixth Element! The spark didn’t work!” Nightmare Moon feels troubled by this display.

“But it did! A different kind of spark.” She turns to smile at us as her friends smile back at her. “I felt it the very moment I realized how happy I was to hear you, to see you, how much I cared about you.” She tears up. “The spark ignited inside me when I realized that you all... are my friends!”

A light shined above her, and the sixth element appeared, floating down towards Twilight.

“You see, Nightmare Moon, when those Elements are ignited by the... the spark that resides in the heart of us all, it creates the sixth element: the element of... magic!”

They all shined with power, the shards are transforming into necklaces while the sixth element became a crown on top of Twilight's head.

“Jumper.” I turn around to see Twilight smiling at me “This is what you meant, isn’t it?” I nodded at her.

Nightmare Moon growled at me. “This is all your fault!” She then blast a bolt at me, it was to sudden for me to react as I got hit by it, creating an explosion as smoke covers him.

“JUMPER!” Everypony exclaimed seeing him getting blasted, especially Fluttershy.

The smoke clears as I open my eyes slowly to notice.

That I was completely fine.

“W-what, how is this possible!?” Nightmare Moon in disbelief said before getting engulfed by a huge rainbow laser by them.

“Nooo! Nooo!” Nightmare Moon screamed in horror. Soon a bright white light flash all of us.

As the light faded, I open my eyes. I see the main six unconscious on the ground. I walk over to Twilight and sit down beside her, then I poke her in the cheek. She grumbles as her eyes open to see me.

“Wake up.” I told her as I held a helping hand. She takes it and uses it to help for stand.

“Ugh, my head.” I hear Rainbow groan.

“Everypony okay?” Applejack asked everypony if they're ok.

“Oh, thank goodness.” Rarity said, she was happy when she sees her tail now grown back.

“Why Rarity, it's so lovely.” Fluttershy complimented her, Rarity poses.

“I know! I'll never part with it again.” Rarity waved her tail, never wanting it to go again.

“No. Your necklace.” Fluttershy pointed out. “It looks just like your cutie mark.” Upon hearing this everypony checked theirs

“What?” Rarity sees that it has her cutie mark with her signature purple colour “Ooh. So does yours.” She pointed out to Fluttershy which also has her cutie mark with her pink.

“Look at mine! Look at mine!” Pinkie shows her was a bloon shaped with blue colours. Applejack's was an orange apple.

“Aw yeah.” Rainbow's was a red lighting shape gem. Twilight looks up to see her crown has a star shape gem.

“Gee, Twilight! I thought you were just spoutin’ a lot of hooey, but I reckon we really do represent the elements of friendship.” Applejack said while smiling softly at her.

“Indeed you do.” A motherly voice said. We all looked through the window, the sun started to rise through the horizon, as a light came down from the sun, revealing a tall and regal alicorn, her coat was white tinted pink, her mane was flowing with multiple colors, and wore a crown, hoofshoes, and a mantle, and her 'cutie-mark' was a shining sun! It was none other tha-

“Princess Celestia” Twilight said as she and I approaches her mentor. Everypony but her and I bow to her.

“Twilight Sparkle, my faithful student. I knew you could do it.” She soon notices me. “It seems you didn’t just make friends with other ponies.” Celestia said referring to me as they both hug.

“Jumper, its Princess Celestia. bow down, show some respect.” She tries to force me down by levitation but was confused and feels abit exhausted when nothing happened .

Celestia giggles. “It is alright Twilight. He is new after all.” She looks at me. “I welcome you to Equestria, what’s is your name?”

“Jumper, I am Jumper the human.” I replied, keeping a straight face.

“But... you told me it was all an old pony tale.” Twilight asks her mentor, confused.

“I told you that you needed to make some friends, nothing more. I saw the signs of Nightmare Moon’s return, and I knew it was you who had the magic inside to defeat her, but you could not unleash it until you let true friendship into your heart. Now if only another will as well. Princess Luna!” She walked over to what remained of Nightmare Moon, Pieces of armour scattered everywhere. Right there is an alicorn, smaller than Celestia, she had a deep blue coat and gentle blue mane and tail, wore a little black crown, and had the same cutie-mark, she gasp when she saw Celestia.

“It has been a thousand years since I have seen you like this. Time to put our differences behind us. We were meant to rule together, little sister.” This time nopony said anything, they already know that she is Celestia's sister from me.

“Will you accept my friendship?” She held a hoof infront of her.

Everypony leans forward in anticipation, Pinkie lean to much causing her to fall over. “Whoa!”

Luna looks at her hoof then hugged her sister tightly. “I’m so sorry! I missed you so much, big sister!’ Luna apologies to her as tears stream down her eyes.

“I’ve missed you, too.” Celestia comforts her. Pinkie was sobbing as she wipes her tears with a handkerchief, then she went full blown crying as she creates a pool of tears around her.

“Hey, you know what this calls for?” Pinkie exclaimed as she suddenly switch emotions.

“A party?” I said, knowing what this calls for.

Pinkie giggles, then confetti begins flying everywhere. “A party!”

Everypony in Ponyville is celebrating the defeat of Nightmare Moon, confetti and cheers everywhere. Although I did want this to be over with, I decided to spend more time here before I ask Celestia.

I make sure to spend extra time hanging out with Fluttershy, Lyra, and Button on this occasion.

I stand next to Twilight, which was looking a bit gloomy. Celestia notices it and address to her.

“Why so glum, my faithful student?” The Princess approach both of us. “Are you not happy that your quest is complete and you can return to your studies in Canterlot?” Princess Celestia asked.

“That's just it.” Twilight sadly confessed, her eyes fixed on the ground. “Just when I learned how wonderful it is to have friends, I have to leave them.”

Celesta takes a moment to respond. “Spike, take a note, please. I, Princess Celestia, hereby decree that the unicorn Twilight Sparkle shall take on a new mission for Equestria. She must continue to study the magic of friendship. She must report to me her findings from her new home in Ponyville.” Everypony cheers at this.

“Oh thank you, Princess Celestia! I'll study harder than ever before.” The book worm pony vowed to her.

“Isn't this exciting? Pinkie exclaimed. “Are you excited cause I'm excited I've never been so excited, well, except for the time that I went” She gasp deeply “but I mean really-”

Ok... its time.

I look right at Celestia, her height is just high enough for us to see each other at eye level. “Celestia?” She turns towards me. “I need to have a word with you.” Everypony present upon hearing this focus their attention at us. “I need your help with my situation.”

“Oh? What do you need help with mr Jumper?” Celestia wonders, Luna overhears this and joins in.

“Look at me,” I replied with a firm tone, Celestia was confused by this. “I am sure you never since beings like me before?” She nodded. “You’ve probably assume I came from a far away land. But no, its much further.” The Princess raises her eyebrow.

“I am from another universe entirely, this isn’t my reality.” Everypony gasp in shock except for Fluttershy who already knew and the Princesses who just stare at me wide eyed.

“I detected no fault hoods.” Celestia said. “Can you explain?” I nodded and begin to explain everything to her, from my time in Equestria from start to finish. I did reveal my knowledge about the future but I kept the details extremely minimal.

She closes her eyes. “I am sorry Jumper, but this is something me and Luna haven’t dealt with before within our entire lifetime,” I sighed. “But we will try to help you, we will search through our entire library in hopes of a way, its not guaranteed however.” I smile, there's hope.

“However,” Luna chimes in. “There is one thing on my mind. Its about you Jumper.” I cock an eyebrow at her. “How did you survive a blast sent at you back at the castle.” Celestia and the main six looked at me.

“Yeah,” Twilight said. “You were hit by a magic bolt from Nightmare Moon, yet you left without as much as a single scratch.”

Celestia puts a hoof in our chin in thought before she has an idea. “Stand back, I have an idea why.” Everypony take a few steps back as Celestia lits her horn at me, she seemingly is trying and struggling but nothing happened to me. “Just as I thought.” Princess Celestia said as she stops pointing her horn at me as she pants a bit.

“What did you do?” I asked.

“I tried to levitate you off the ground, but its like you weight a ton.” Celestia explained. “I have a theory, since you are from a completely different universe, our magic either gets blocked or absorb by you.” I grimaced, picking up what she is implying.

“Does... does that mean?” my voice cracking a little.

“It means you are completely immune to magic.” Everypony gasps at this “Since you are immune to magic, even if we have found a solution, we can’t send you home as that requires magic.” She gives me a sympathetic look. “I am sorry Jumper, there’s nothing we can do.”

Her last words echoed through my head as she said that. I dropped to my knee. Darkness swallows everything around me as I see darkness everywhere.

Then I feel a something warm, I snapped out of it to see Fluttershy hugging me. “Shh, oh you poor thing.” She gently said.

I slowly got up and looked around me as Fluttershy lets go off the hug. I turn and walked away as they all watched me leave.

Author's Note

Honestly not much I can think to change with this episode

Chapter 7: Dealing With Grief

The light shine across my face as the morning light shines.

I smile and got up, only to grimly frown when I see the same white void I always see when I looked outside.

Yesterday was real. The words Celestia said still echoed in my head.

“I am sorry Jumper, there’s nothing we can do.”

I wanted to yelled at her, I wanted it to be a lie, a joke, I wanted to be angry at her.

But I can't blame her.

“Its ok Celestia... you tried.” I weakly said. a pain came across my chest as I clutch it with my hand.

Damn it, it hurts more than I anticipated.

I didn't bother to brush my teeth as I change into my usual clothes. I went down stairs, seeing the portraits on the walls as I went to the kitchen.

I wasn't in the mood to cook anything today so I just eat instant noodles for breakfast.

I decided to check the garage so I entered the garage. I see my car just parked there, normally when I feel down I drive around the city with it. However the garage door, just like the windows, were jammed and unbreakable.

I rummage through the junk I stored in the garage, after a few minutes of searching I found it. My first photo album.

I went through each pages, each filled with precious memories from back home with my parents, celebrating my friends birthday parties, and a vacation to the beach.

I couldn't hold back as a tear dropped on the page.

I am sorry.

Angel Bunny [POV]

Angel Bunny was worried, not as much as when he thinks about Fluttershy's safely but worried none the less.

Staring infront of the massive door, he thought about what happened the other day.

Jumper, a friend of his. He came back inside her cottage, he entered his hone without looking or saying a word to us.

That look of his when I saw him.

I remember what Fluttershy told me yesterday about Jumper. Don’t worry Angel, he just needs some space.

He needs more than that. That look on his face, is a face of loss, grief.

The same look that I once had before when I look at my reflection from the river.

Honestly, if I didn't meet Fluttershy, I doubt I would've made it this far.

I really don't know what to do, how can I help him?

*Sighed* I just hope he doesn't go down the path I once took.

Lyra Heartstrings [POV]

I sat on the same bench, where I have first talked with Jumper.

Its been about a three days since Nightmare Moon's defeat. Jumper hasn't shown up in our usual meeting spot. I remember back at the celebration, Jumper was talking with Princess Celestia. I hadn't heard much from what they said but whatever it was, it left him heartbroken.

Thinking back to our conversations we had. everytime we talked, a reoccurring topic always pops up.

Family.

His face shows more expression when he talks about them. His mood shine gold like a lyre.

My best guess is that it has something to do with family.

From what I could see back at the celebration, its like he loss something very important to him.

If that's the case, I know how you feel Jumper.

Viola... sister where are you?

Button Mash [POV]

I sat in the middle of town, playing with my GameColt as always. I turn to look around, Mr Monkey Man hasn't shown up yet.

Its been a week, I wondered where he is?

Speaking of Mr Monkey Man, I don't understand why ponies don't like him. I heard them call him a monster who can mind... control? Whatever that means, and a bunch of other nasty stuff.

Mr Monkey Man isn't a bad pony, he is just like anypony else, hay he even plays video games, there's no such thing as a monster who plays video games.

We talked about strategies, cheat codes, a bunch of video game stuff really. The hoofheld device he has, he said that it was a gift from his dad.

I haven't met my dad yet so I don't know how it feels. He really loves his dad and really misses him, it makes me wonder how would I feel for my dad if I ever got to meet him.

When I told mommy about dad, she said that he is never coming back, mommy seems so sad, I don't know why.

Why is he never coming back?

Fluttershy [POV]

Everyday I get more concerned for Jumper, its been a week and he hasn't come out of his house.

It must've been really devastated for him to learned that.

I tried knocking on his door but he wouldn't answer, I can't get in because he locked it.

I was tending to my animals when Angel tapped on my hoof, I looked down to see him pointing at a window.

Confused, I looked outside to see Jumper. He was walking away from my cottage. I turn to Angel who gives me a look in his eyes, I understand what he wants me to do.

I exited my cottage and follow him, eventually he stopped at a hill as he sits down to look at Ponyville.

I sit next to him, he turns and jumps in surprised. “Oh... its just you Fluttershy.” He said.

“Jumper...” I said. “I am worried about you, Lyra is worried about you to. You haven’t come out of your home for a week now,” I turn to look at him with a determined look. “If you have something, I will listen.”

He just looks at me and sighs. “Its hard Fluttershy, being stranded in this world forever is hard. Away from my family, my friends, the life I had before I suddenly lost them.” He turns towards Ponyville. ”I don’t know how or why I am sent here, I have devices that I can use to contact my family, yet I can't, I feel like it was mocking me.” He rubs his eye. “I already accepted that I may possibly stay here permanently the moment I stepped in Equestria. It just hurts alot when it actually happened.” I lean against him. As we take a few moments to look over Ponyville.

“Do you feel better now that you let it all out?” I asked. He smiles abit.

“It does feel a bit lighter. I can’t be like this forever, the pain may never go away, but at least I have you.” He stands up and so do I.

We then went back to my cottage and we have dinner together before he goes to bed.

Chapter 8: Learning With The OCD

Today is the day, since I unpleasantly discovered that I am going to be staying here permanently.

Since I am going to be living in this world for the rest of my natural life, I am going to have to learn about this world as a whole. Even if it means going to the Golden Oaks Library where Twilight Sparkle resides.

Fluttershy's books have helped, but her cottage is not a library. I'll have to face Twilight, even if it means having to sit through a million questions.

I started to walk through Ponyville, I ignore the ponies around me. I am making my way to the library, every step make me sweat abit in nervousness.

Then, I finally see the library in the distance. I quicken my pace until I reach the front door.

I lift my arm to knock until I realized.

This is a public library. I simply just open the door and let myself in.

I entered the library, and then I got smacked in the face by a book and then multiple books fell on top of me

“Oh my gosh! I am sorry!” A female voice said. I pull the book off of my face to see Twilight Sparkle staring at me.

“Oh, Jumper! Surprised to see you again, I hope you aren't sad about what happened a week ago.” She said as she look at me with a sympathetic look.

“Oh, I am sad about it. The pain may never go away but I have to accept it. Anyways this is the second time I've been smacked in the face by a book.” I plainly said. Twilight smiled sheepishly.

“I was just reorganizing the library using levitation, it suddenly stopped working for some reason. What brings you here Jumper?” Twilight asked.

“I am here to read some books from the library, what else is there to do in the library?” I scratch my head. “Since I'll be here permanently, I need to learn about customs, laws, anything really to help me adjust living here.” Twilight's ears perks up.

“Well... since you're here.” She then levitates a scroll and quill as she put on a very wide smile. I gulp, knowing what's about to come.

Here we go.

Session

Me and Twilight looked at each other as we sit down. I speak up first.

“I think you already know what am I. I am a human, or homo sapiens if you prefer the scientific term.” She nodded as she writes down on the scroll.

“Where do you come from Jumper?” She asked.

“I came from the country of The United States of America in the state of Florida.” She writes them down.

“Could you tell me more about your species?” I nodded.

“We are pretty much the dominant species back home as we are the only sentient beings. Our lifespans are an average of 70 years but we can extent that with modern medicine and we are adaptable. We are everywhere in our planet, with 195 countries, each having their own culture and with a total population of over 8.1 billion.” Twilight jaw dropped in shock.

“8.1 billion!? How did you humans have so many!? Our population can barely reach a million!?” I shrugged.

“Advance technology. We don't have strength like earth ponies, we can't fly like pegasus, we can't use magic like unicorns. We use our brains and create things to make things easier or more efficiently. Our advance agriculture can fend all our people while our advance medicines extent our lifespans and make us live longer.” She scribbles all of that shit down.

“How advance is your technology compared to us.” I snatch my head.

“Pretty confusing, comparing our technology to your. I'll say its a combination of the mediaeval era, the industrial revolution, and the 1980s I think? By the way our current year is 2023.” I ended. Twilight again gobbling all of it up.

We talked for awhile as I exchange a bunch of stuff about humanity, Twilight's scroll is long as hell. Then its my turn to ask her questions about this world, apparently this world is named Equus, I begin learning stuff that I have never knew when I watched the show and learning their customs.

I've learned that further north in Griffonia there's apparently a land of the undead but Twilight dismisses it as a myth.

Yeah considering that this is the world of magic, I'll take that with a grain of salt.

“So, uh yeah I think we are done here for now.” I stand up. “Welp, see you tomorrow.” I quickly try to walk away not wanting to stay here much longer.

“Wait!” I stopped much to my chagrin. “I have one more thing to do.” Twilight walks up to me.

“And what is that?” I turn to look at her.

“I want to test your magic immunity, see how much it extents than just being immune.” She replied. I groan.

“Promise that after this, it will be everything for today?” She nodded.

Welp here we go.

Experimentation

We were testing the extents of my magic immunity to see if there's more to it, there was more.

Turns out I can cancel spells, when I touched a levitated book it dropped to the ground.

We have also found out I can redirect magic bolts, basically I can simply slap it away. Really useful if I have ever gotten into a fight with a magic user, I just have to catch it.

This immunity does have down sides, when I said its immune I mean immune. If I am gravely injured then I can't be healed with healing magic, sucks when your body is fragile, healing magic would've been super useful.

On the bright side cockatrices can't turn me into stone when they see me.

This magic immunity could explain why Pinkie couldn't sense me with her pinkie sense and her ability to somehow know things she shouldn't have. My guess is that Pinkie's abilities are their own unique magic because of generations living in a rock farm. Its probably why Twilight couldn't find magic in her when she test her in "Feeling Pinkie Keen".

Anyways I am tired as shit from answering Twilight long as questions. I was given a library card by Spike so I can burrow some of the books in the library for me to read, really tired as shit so I went to bed.

Today has been really knowledgeable, learned some slurs I could use as a last resort in case if a pony I encounter is a bitch.

Is it me or am I forgetting something?

Chapter 11: A Day Living In Ponyville

I wake up from my bed from the bright ass light that keeps shining me, because my curtains were thin as hell and I am either to busy or to lazy to replace it.

It became my alarm clock everytime I wanna wake up.

I got off of bed and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth, only to find I ran out of toothpaste. Great, I hope I don't get charge 100 bits for one because it will be even more bullshitter than carrots.

I went to take a hot shower, when its not hot enough? Crank it up to the maximum, much better. Don't know why they said that it will melt my skin off if they have that option.

Wear my usual clothes, green pants and shirt along with a blue coat. Make sure to bring pepper spray in case if a pony decides to break my neko neko knee caps.

Went downstairs to the kitchen to prepare some instant noodles as it's the only food option that can give me enough energy for most of the day since Ponyville is still in a food shortage.

I grabbed my fully charged DS and walk to the front door to enter Equestria. I always see Fluttershy when I came out, feeding her animals.

Exited her cottage and went into Ponyville, my relationship with most of the townsfolk hasn't change that much. Although now the demand for nails is lowered, doesn't mean there aren't scared, just not enough to make them board up their houses for the tenth time.

Entered the Golden Oaks Library to read, greeted Spike, pick a book and sat down to read.

I read a law book which made me realize that I wasn't given an immigrant status since Celestia most likely forgot to give me a certificate, not going to blame her as it slipped my mind as well.

Since I am not an immigrant, I am considered an illegal immigrant and I'll be deported back to where I came from. Since I can't go home, I suspect I'll be dropped off in a random country which I am not ready for yet.

I went to the town hall to apply for a equestrian citizenship since it happens to be very easy to get one. Just one problem though, Mayor Mare.

Out of all the ponies I expected to be racist, I didn't expect the mayor. That bitch didn't bother to tell me where can I register for one, we both probably spent several minutes arguing with each other before she pulled out pepper spray and sprayed my god damn face, granted its not enough to fully incapacitated me but it hurt regardless. I have to restrain myself from flipping her desk out of anger as it will put me in more trouble than its worth.

Thankfully there's an employee who helped me in my predicament, he is a unicorn stallion who gave me water to wash my eyes and help me register for citizenship. He's a pretty chill guy, and his name is Paper Stamper.

I exited the building with my citizenship in hand. If I see that mayor again I am going to slap her.

I visited Bon Bon's candy shop, me and Lyra hang around for a bit and I brought some candies from them. Unlike last time, the amount of sugar is not absurdly high to the point where I could die.

Lunch came and decided to choose to eat at a restaurant because I want to at least give it a chance. I sat at one of the tables and hold a menu up at my face. Most of the stuff they serve aren't even edible.

At the corner of my eye, a waiter approaches me. I lowed the menu to look at him.

“Excuse me sir?” The waiter said.

“Yes?” I just said.

“I am afraid that we have to ask you to leave.” I go what the fuck?

“The fu- WHY!?” I shouted.

“We don't serve pets here.” he said plainly.

My already sour mood from dealing with Mayor Mare didn't help at all. I am fuckin pissed that I wasn't considered a fucking person.

I left to avoid making trouble. I just went home and eat noodles again.

Vented my frustration towards Fluttershy, she was a great help and a good friend who will listen.

Went back out and meet up with Button Mash and played some video games together. He beats me in every single game, I feel like a useless piece of shit.

Me and Button went to Sugarcube Corner to get a snack to eat. I have to make sure Pinkie puts less sugar, and I mean less enough sugar so I won't get sick, have to get really specific.

Me and Button went our separate ways, later as I sat down at a random bench, I caught Bon Bon from behind me about to attempt knocking me out with chloroform. How did I caught somepony who works as a secret agent? Got a strange feeling that I was being watched, thanks evolution.

I made a promise to Bon Bon that I won't reveal her secrets. She is going to keep an eye on me.

Found a dental clinic on my walk, remembering that I am out of toothpaste I went in hoping I could buy some since the building doubles as a store for dental hygiene. Found that out from reading a poster from outside.

The pony who works there is surprisingly genuinely polite and express interest in learning about my dental structure. Her name is Colgate and she looks exactly like a pony named Minuette expect she has a toothbrush for a cutie mark, I am surprised to find out both of them are twins.

I let her study my teeth as I had nothing to do right now and she is pretty kind so why not? She isn't scared that she finds out I eat meat but excited to get to learn more about my canines.

After what felt like hours, she lets me go and I bought some toothpaste from her. Actually multiple as there's no human sized toothpastes.

Went back to her cottage, eat dinner with Fluttershy and went back to my house. I charge my DS and dash towards my desk. I booted up my computer to play some roblox tower defense games.

After an hour, I shut off my PC as I feel like melting out of boredom from grinding gems. Went to my garage and dive into my junk.

After that I went back upstairs to my study room and begin writing my book. Revising, adding, brainstorming.

Went to take another hot shower and switch to my pyjamas and then lay down in bed while turning on my phone to rewatch every episode of season 1.

And then I go to sleep. May or may not be ready to deal with tomorrow.

Chapter 9: Ticket Shenanigans (The Ticket Master)

“Are you shitting with me Golden Harvest?” I said with irritation at the yellow coat orange mane earth pony as she glares at me.

I am standing infront of her carrot stall trying to buy one fucking carrot using the bits I've borrowed from Fluttershy.

“I know I am new here but even I know the value of a bit. That guy over there,” I point to a stallion who is holding a bag full of carrots. “Bought a bag full for the same price as you are charging me for ONE carrot!” This is complete bullshit, I don't know why am I even surprised at all but still all I want is one carrot as I can finally finish the dish I wanted to make for lunch.

If you are wondering no, Fluttershy used all the carrots to feed her animals. Out of all the times to runs out of carrots.

Needless to say I didn't buy one because of equestrian stupidity. Seriously she tries to charge me 10 bits for one carrot, she probably thinks I am stupid enough that I don't know the value of their currency.

As much as I want to pepper spray her, that won't do good for my repetition even though its already shit anyway. I brought pepper spray everytime I went into Ponyville for self defense not for assault.

I grumble as I walk down the road, guess that meal will have to wait until I find another way of getting a carrot.

Down the road I see four ponies and a dragon, Twilight, Spike, Rarity, Pinkie and Fluttershy. I approach them.

“Hey girls, what are you four chatting about?” I asked, Pinkie zipped over to me.

“We are talking about our reasons on why we wanted to go to the Grand Galloping Gala!” She said with a cheerful voice. My brain is currently loading, I swear I remember something but I can't put my finger on it.

“What's the Grand Galloping Gala?” Everypony gasps and looking at me in shock upon hearing this.

“You don't know what is the Grand Galloping Gala!?” Rarity screech. I cocked an eyebrow.

“Uh, hello not from here?” I simply said, Everypony blushes in embarrassment.

“The Grand Galloping Gala is an annual royal ball created to celebrate the completion of Canterlot after Equestria was founded.” Twilight said. I widen my eyes.

I remember now! This is the events of The Ticket Master, the plot revolves Twilight getting two tickets to it but all five of her friends wanted to join. I frown upon realizing it.

“If you are wondering, no I will not be going to the Gala.” I said, Twilight tilts her head confused.

“Why not Jumper? Everypony wants to go the Grand Galloping Gala?” I facepalm from Twilight's words.

“Yeah, everypony. Also because its in Canterlot, and I'll probably be locked up or killed when the snobbish nobles calls the royal guards on me.” Fluttershy looks at me in horror while Rarity just look at me in disappointment.

“Darling, have more faith. I am sure the nobles at Canterlot won't call the guards upon the sight of you.” Rarity said, however Twilight hisses anxiously.

“Yeah... maybe its the best you don't go, speaking from somepony who grew up in Canterlot.” Rarity's face turns to horror when the book mare basically confirming my assumptions are not exaggerated.

“Anyways I gotta go, I still need to get that one carrot.” Fluttershy raise a brow.

“But I thought you went to the market to buy the carrot?” My face shows a little frustration.

“That mare who sells them tries to sell me the carrot for ten bits.” Fluttershy gasps. “I know, totally shocking” I said sarcastically.

“Hey wait a minute!” I then hear a voice who coming from a certain Rainbow pegasus. She landed infront of Twilight.

“Rainbow, are you following me?” Twilight asked.

“Wait for another minute! That ticket is mine Rainbow!” Applejack exclaimed as she appears.

Seems my presence changed their dialogues away from the original show, should make a mental note of that.

Everything soon devolves into an argument, five mares besides Twilight fighting over a single ticket.

However I legit don't care, I only care about how am I going to get that carrot.

“QUIIIEEETT” Twilight yelled, Everypony went quiet, well except for Pinkie Pie who talks about oatmeal before going silent as well.

Twilight tells them the tickets are hers and she should be the one to decide who gets to go. All five have a look of displeasure and soon walks away grumbling.

Then Twilight's stomach growls. And soon mine as well.

“Wanna grab lunch Jumper?” Twilight asked.

I waved her off. “No thank you, I am planning on cooking lunch myself. I just need one carrot.” And that me, Twilight and Spike went our separate ways.

Now how I am going to get a carrot. I don't think I can make one being an engineer.

I still haven't get a carrot yet. Walking around the streets, I was getting annoyed. Golden Harvest is the only pony who farms and sells the damn carrots, I don't think asking for one from the townsfolk will do me any good.

I turn the conner to see in the distance, there's a store. But that wasn't why it caught my attention, it was named Bon Bon's sweet shop.

I was reminded of Lyra, I pretty much forgot to visit her after the whole incident over a week ago. I should check on Button Mash too as well.

Then I got a realisation. I could ask Lyra if their fridge has any carrots leftover, I mean I am only asking one.

I walk over to the sweet shop and enter the front door to see Lyra sitting on a stoll chatting with and a cream colored earth pony at the counter.

They are to busy talking to each other to notice me. I walked up to them, got really close and said.

“Hey Lyra.” Both mares looked up in surprise, the cream colored pony took a step back but Lyra upon seeing me grin wide.

“Jumper!” Lyra said before getting off the stool. “Are you ok?” She asked worryingly. I smile.

“No, not yet.” I bluntly said. “It still hurts but I know I need to move on and accept it. How are you doing Lyra?”

“I am doing fine. What brings you here Jumper?” Lyra asked.

“Do you have any carrots I can borrow Lyra? I need one carrot for the recipe I am making for lunch.” Lyra raises a brow.

“Why? Can't you just go to the market to buy one?” Lyra asked confused. I grumbled.

“That mare in charge of selling them gives terrible customer service. She tried to charge me ten bits for one.” Lyra gasps.

“I'll have a talk with Carrot Top about it later.” Lyra's face turns serious. I look to see Bon Bon staring at me, I can tell she is analysing me. No surprise as she is a former secret agent, they need to have keen observation skills to be able to compile and retain relevant information. Then I feel the need to do some trolling as my smile turns mischievous.

I point to Bon Bon, “Hey Lyra, your marefriend is looking at me weird.” Both of the mares faces become red as a tomato. “With a look like that, she could very well be a secret agent.” Bon Bon recoiled when I said that as her pupils shrink to a diameter of a needle.

“Jumper!” Lyra said flustered as she nudges my leg “Me and Bon Bon aren't a thing! We are just great friends. Besides, even in the very unlikely possibly that she's a secret agent, she would tell me.” She giggled. “Right, Bon Bon?” Lyra asked. The earth pony rubs the back of her head and giggled nervously.

“Ye-yeah, I wouldn't hide something like that from you Lyra.” She said. She looks at me to see a wide smile that basically says that I know, she glares at me.

And suddenly, Pinkie Pie.

“Hey Lyra and Bon Bon!” Pinkie exclaimed as she suddenly pops in. Making us all jump from surprise. “I wanna throw Twilight a surprise, do you wanna join?” She asked.

“Uh-uhm sure?” Lyra said, her brain trying to comprehend this.

“GREAT!” Pinkie said in cheery excitement, before dragging Bon Bon and Lyra away as she exits through the front door.

I just stood there, it took awhile but I snapped out of it. I look around and shrugged.

“I doubt Lyra will mind if I take one.” I said as I went into their kitchen. It took a moment but I've found what I have been looking for.

I inwardly cheer that I finally got the carrot I needed. Walking back home, the streets are quiet but that's expected since they are all outside of Golden Oak Library.

Then I feel like someone bumped into me. I look down to see Twilight with Spike on her back.

“Sorry for bumping into you Jumper gotta go!!” Twilight urgently said as they run off.

I saw that she dropped something on the ground, I went to pick up it to see two golden coloured tickets.

“That monkey creature has the tickets! Get him!” I turn around to see a mob of ponies coming straight for me. My eyes pricked when I realized what I am holding.

The tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala.

Not wanting to be mobbed, I put the tickets into my pocket and made a dash for my life as the mob is chasing behind me.

I zipped around corners and went through back alleys, heck I even have to climb up a wall. Unfortunately due to my height and the fact I am not a pony, it makes it difficult to lose the mob as I stuck out like a sore thumb.

I am panting from exhaustion, if I don't do something fast, they will catch up to me and I'll probably be trampled.

Digging through my pockets, I pull out my pepper spray. Sure my repetition may be fucked over more but I rather not be sent to the hospital.

Besides they will probably destroy the carrot I worked so hard to find, and I am really hungry.

Hearing the horde of hoofsteps behind me, I whipped around, pepper spray in hand and spray the crowd. The crowd recoil as they begin to feel a burning sensation in their eyes, most fall to the ground as their instinct is to cover their eyes with their forelegs, making them lose balance. They all scream in pain as I took the opportunity to make a run for it.

The sun beginning to set as I turn to corner to see the Golden Oak Library. I dash over to the library, got inside and locked the door.

I sigh in relief until I see the main six except Twilight looking at me.

“Hey Jumpy! Where were you?” Pinkie immediately come face to face with me, she only grins at me.

“I don't know getting chase by a mob over two tic-” I pause. “Jumpy?” I cocked an eyebrow at that nickname.

“Its your nickname! do you like it?” Pinkie asked, I shrugged and nodded. Why the hell not?

I hear hoofsteps going down stairs, I look to see Twilight walking down stairs, a letter covered in a lavender aura. Spike came down as well to join us.

“Jumper? Are you ok? You looked exhausted.” Twilight asked in a worried tone. I pulled out the tickets from my pocket.

“Here's are your fucking tickets.” I said with a hint of irritation. “I got chased all over Ponyville because of it and I am tired as shit.” I put the tickets on the ground as Twilight levitates them over to her.

She stare into the tickets for awhile before putting them inside the scroll and rolling it. “I've made my decision.” She then was interrupted by Rainbow Dash.

“Yes! That ticket is mine!” She celebrates early. Everypony deadpan at her while I glare at her with a 'I will choke you' look. She chuckled nervously. “Heh-heh, sorry.”

“... Anyways, I decided my decision is that I will choose... nopony.” Twilight said as everypony gasps in shock. “if I can't bring all of you, the next best thing is that none of us go.” She gives the scroll to Spike. “I am sending these tickets back, they have been nothing but trouble ever since we got them.” No shit.

“Are you sure about this Twilight?” Applejack asked. She nodded.

“I don't want to disappoint you all, I want you all to be happy. But I can't do that with just two tickets.” Twilight nods at Spike, telling him to send it. Spike then burns the letter along with the tickets, a magical smoke trail sending to Princess Celestia.

Touched by this, everypony got into a group hug except me and Spike.

Suddenly, Spike begins to gagged. I pat him on the back, which cause him to burp out a scroll. “Can't the scroll be sent anywhere other than your in stomach?”

“I wish.” Spike said as he grabs the scroll and begins reading it. “My faithful student Twilight, Why didn't you just say so in the first place?” Underneath the scroll he found. “Seven tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala!” wait what?

“Now we all can go!” Pinkie excitedly cheered as everypony cheer with her.

Twilight and mine stomach growled, and loud. “How about we treat you both to dinner, we own you for the trouble we cause.” Rarity suggested.

“No thank you Rarity,” I hold up my carrot. “I am going home to cook something to eat as I finally got the carrot I needed for it.”

They each were given a ticket. Spike was given a ticket as I made it clear I don't want to go, Spike pretended to be upset about having to go before I wipe his bullshit up and called out his lie which made the girls giggle at Spike.

Spike lets out another belch and another scroll pops out. “Huh? Another one?” Rainbow Dash asked, raising a brow.

Spike reads it. “And one for you Spike.” Spike then pulls out a ticket as my eyes widen.

“Bloody hell, do I have to go to?” I said, irritated, I groan as pull my face with my hand. “Fine, I'll go but Celestia better pays for my funeral if I died because of her.” I grab my ticket. I hear Rainbow Dash grumble.

Twilight then walks up and opens the front door only to see an angry mob of ponies outside her door before she immediately slams and locks the door again.

“Why is there an angry mob outside the door!?” Twilight asked. Oh shit. I look outside the wind to see ponies gathering at the front door of her library with teary red eyes, they're really angry. I don't see Lyra or Bon Bon in the crowd, they either weren't in the crowd that I sprayed or just went home. I am hoping for the former.

“That's probably because of me.” Everypony and Spike turn to look at me. “I use pepper spray on them so I don't get piled over because of fucking tickets.” Twilight looks at me confused.

“What's a pepper spray?” She asked.

I show them the bottle. “This is pepper spray. Its a non lethal self defense weapon that sprays spicy particles into the eyes of an attacker, making it irritate like it was burning your eyes. A disabling weapon that temporary blinds people.” Twilight looks curious at it.

“You gotta let me study it.” She said as she grabs it with her hoofs. Magic doesn't effect objects from my world, the rule doesn't only apply to me.

“Uh, we have more pressing matters.” I point to the front door. “How are we going to deal with the mob outside.”

Yeah its gonna be awhile before I can finally get food in my belly.

Short: The Book

It took awhile but we manage to calm the angry mob down, some of them are still angry at me and wanted to press charges. Unfortunately for them because I was relentless chased around for hours by them, I can't be charge of assault under the gist of justified self defense. Take that!

I got back home and finally got something to eat, I am starving. I went to bed, tired from the whole ordeal.

The next day, I sat at my desk looking at my computer. I am surprised that I forgot that I can check the news on it.

Checking any news on earth, I saw a missing poster of me. I grimaced when I saw it, I faceplant on my desk.

I wish I can tell them I am ok.

Deciding I have enough for today I shut off my desktop and got off for today.

Choosing what I should do now, I looked through my garage to see what I can find in the pile of junk I never throw out.

Digging through boxes, I find a notebook. It has never been used, all empty pages.

Looking at the notebook, I got a spark. I grabbed it and went to my study room. I place down my notebook and write the title of this book. It shall be titled.

A Foreigners Guide To Living In Equus.

Prelude: Welcome To Equus

To whoever reads this, human, natives of Equus, or a foreign alien, I don't care.

It may be fortunate or unfortunate for you if you somehow ended up in the world call Equus, as they called it. This guide will serve you to help you survive and adapt to the new world you are forced to live in.

Depending on where you are stranded, most likely Equestria. You would have to face challenges of being a foreigner in a world that may or may not be familiar to you.

This is Jumper, I am a human and I hope this book helps you survive, and maybe make this world your home.

Chapter 1: The Basics

Starting off simple, you are not home anymore, you are in Equus. You will most likely be stranded in the country called Equestria, other countries I am not sure.

Thankfully, or completely screwed, is that the natives speak English, do note that they use a different writing system so you can understand what they said but you can't read anything written from it. I am 99% sure that every single sentient beings in this place use the same language. Confused? Mind boggling? This is actually our first topic.

Section 1: Don't even try to think about it

Yes I am being serious, its not a joke. If you hear or see something that's impossible or unbelievable just don't even think about it, you will save yourself the headache.

You are in a completely different world with its own system, like how the sun and moon has to be manually raised and lowered by two beings called alicorns.

Any knowledge or logic you have from your home, ditch it. Not everything you know will apply to your new environment.

I paused writing the first section of the first chapter. This book once I deemed finished will be polished and published.

There's alot more to explore out there, like the Undiscovered West, eccetera. Who knows what kinds of species, civilization, culture, and locations are out there?

Once I am ready, I am going on a journey around Equus, I am going to start something simple first, I already made my decision on where to go.

The Dragon Lands.

Chapter 10: Stubborn As Buck Season (Applebuck Season)

Its been a week since the whole ticket incident. Twilight came to my house because she wanted to borrow my pepper spray to study it, of course I refuse since she will probably break it and it's probably the only one I have.

Twilight is shocked that my house on the outside is just a door but the inside is a whole entire house. Other than Fluttershy and her animals I didn't tell anypony that my house is a pocket dimension.

I didn't leave Twilight empty handed however, I drew Twilight a diagram and a list of materials to make pepper spray which she was happy to receive. Not sure what Twilight did with them after that.

I stayed at home for the week. Gotta let the flames of last week died down, I am probably labeled as a menace to Ponyville or some shit.

I spend the week at home playing video games, messing around with my tools, writing the book, or chatting with Fluttershy. During one of my chats with Fluttershy she told me about the annual rabbit roundup, I was instantly reminded of Applebuck Season, it was an episode that I relate to.

There are boxes of vegan instant noodle packs inside my pantry, I remember a few months ago when me and all of my seven cousins who stayed over ordered boxes of them, one for each. But realized we ordered vegan instead of spicy flavored. I kept them as I don't want them to go to waste, used it a few times during my lazy days.

Right now its really handy as I am running out of vegetables and meat. I can't really buy stuff from the market as I'll most likely be overcharged with ridiculous prices, and Fluttershy can only provide me so much with her budget.

Knowing eating them everyday for a week isn't healthy, but hey a man's gotta eat.

After the end of the week, I decided to leave as I think everything cooled down. I should really visit Button Mash.

Walking down town, I look around for Button Mash. Ponies here are being the usual, they glare or barricade themselves. They rightfully keep their distance, knowing I have a weapon. They do not want to experience from that again.

I kept walking around, passing by various buildings. I turn to see Button Mash sitting on the ground, as always, playing that GameColt of his. I walk over to him.

“Hey kid!” I shouted, Button Mash looks up from his game and sees me, he grins.

“Mr Monkey Man!” He said as he pauses his game and runs over me. Once we closed the distance between each other, I patted his hair as he looks up.

“Sorry I haven't hung out with you for the pass two weeks, stuff happened.” I said with a smile. I hold up my DS. “Wanna game?” Me and Button Mash looked at each other with narrowing eyes as we smile. We sit down and pulled out our devices and...

Play Tetris, I am surprised they have Tetris but I guess with how simple the game is its probably a universal game across universes. We played to see who has the highest score.

“Kid! Get away from that monster!” Me and Button looked up from our game to see a stallion. The colt just looks annoyed, and I just looked at the stallion with an unamused look.

“Shut up, we are just playing video games. Go back to your failure of a marriage or something.” I retorted. The stallion then ran away crying, probably because what I said is accurate even though its came from pure luck. We then resume playing our game.

“I still don't understand why they keep calling you a monster.” Button said with annoyance, not taking his eyes off the game.

“Ponies often fear things that they don't understand. Making stuff up isn't understanding, its an excuse to not make an effort. They imagine all those things so they can pretend that they put effort.” I said in a casual voice. Button contemplates this piece of advice.

I'll admit, I lost, so many damn rounds. Kid is pretty damn good, I am surprised he hasn't gotten a cutie mark from it.

Both our stomachs begin to growl, I wonder how long we were playing. I don't feel like eating anymore noodles, since I don't have any food left to cook, I'll have to buy something to eat.

The market? Definitely out of the question, I'll probably be charge with a hundred bits for a carrot. The restaurant? They serve food that I can't eat without poisoning myself.

There's only two options I can think off, Sweet Apple Acres, and Sugarcube Corner. Those in charge are ponies that aren't going to bullshit me with overwhelming prices. One is a friend of mine, and another is just an acquaintance.

I don't feel like craving apples so its pretty obvious what I'll choose.

“Wanna go to Sugarcube Corner for something to eat?” I asked, Button nodded happily.

I just have to hope I don't get high blood sugar from taking a bite, gotta make sure to ask Pinkie to add less sugar.

We both trotted to Sugarcube Corner, on the way some random ponies get in our way because I was with Button. Of course they backed away once I pulled out my pepper spray. Button is irritated everytime it happens.

Eventually we reached Sugarcube Corner and entered, inside we see a crowd of ponies at the front of the counter, Lyra and Bon Bon are among them.

“Hey Lyra.” I said, both mares jumped in surprised before they turn around to see me. Bon Bon upon seeing me give me a glare.

“Jumper!” Lyra grins at me. “Its good to see you again.” Yeah I think they didn't get sprayed which is a relief.

“Good to see you Lyra, our meeting last week was cut short and I was chased around Ponyville because of ponies obsession over the gala.” I chuckled. “Pretty sure I am labeled the menace of Ponyville or something because I defend myself.” Lyra ears droop.

“Yeah... sorry about last week, we are with the crowd that chased you. I snapped out of it halfway but the others are difficult for me to stop them, sorry.” I patted her hair.

“All water under the bridge, Me and Button just wanted something to eat.” I pulled out a pouch of bits from my pocket. “This is money Fluttershy gave me weeks ago, I haven't got to use it due to, reasons...”

“Anyway why are you and many other ponies are waiting at the counter? It seems like you are eagerly waiting something.” I added.

“Oh! We are waiting to try Pinkie's muffin samples!” Lyra said, my pupils shrink upon hearing this.

Damn it, how can I forget this scene in Applebuck Season. My knowledge of My Little Pony is rusty, When I have time, I should rewatch it.

I look to see Applejack and Pinkie coming out of the kitchen, each holding a tray of muffins in their mouths. They place them at the counter.

“Free muffin sample spectacular!” Pinkie exclaimed, everypony begin to drool upon the sight of the muffins, even Button Mash is drooling at those unassuming steaming muffins. But I knew better.

“Yeah! Muffin spectacles! Get 'em while they're hot!” Applejack exclaimed, ponies begin grabbing the muffins off the tray.

Lyra and Bon Bon was going to grab one until I stopped them by grabbing their manes.

“I wouldn't eat those if I were you.” I said to them, they were taken aback a bit from how serious my tone is. I see Applejack leaving the counter and into the kitchen, probably exiting through the backdoor.

The ponies around us begin taking a bite out of their muffins. However the moment they do their face turn green as they begin falling into the floor.

Lyra, Bon Bon, and Button Mash gasps as they watch them moaning in pain and clutching their stomachs, one of them even vomited on the floor.

Pinkie looked at them in confusion. “Huh?” She then picks up one of the muffins. “What's wrong with the muffin spectacular?” She opens her mouth to take a bite, I looked at her in horror.

“Wait Pinkie no!” I shouted as I reach out my arm at her. To late as she already taken a bite.

Later me, Lyra and Bon Bon have to help transport all the sick mares to the medical tent. We helped, including Button Mash, nurse Redheart to take care of the ill, most of the sick ponies though show their displeasure at me taking care of them, however they feel to week to resist so they let me, Lyra make sure to silence them with a glare when they trashtalk about me.

“What happened? We came as soon as we heard.” I hear a familiar voice, I turn to see Twilight looking at the patients. Spike was also here as well.

“There was a mishap with the baked good.” Redheart answered.

“No... not baked goods.” Pinkie said as she lays sickly at one of the beds. “Baked bads.”

“Applejack...” Twilight announced.

Spike picks up one of the bad muffins, I don't know what the hell did it ended up here. He then eats.

“Want one?” Spike asked.

“A definite fu-” I stop myself. “Freaking hell no! Its common sense not to eat stuff that makes you sick. Well since you are a dragon and you are not getting sick from eating it, eat them as much as you like.” I responded.

“More for me!” Spike takes another bite of the muffin.

Twilight then leaves the tent to confront Applejack, I follow after her.

“I am coming with you Twilight.” I said. We make the walk to Sweet Apple Acres.

During our trot to Sweet Apple Acres, I asked Twilight about what she did with the diagram I gave her.

I've learned that she manage to recreate a bottle of pepper spray and sent it to Celestia to show her.

Now pepper spray is being use by any law enforcement in Equestria due to its usefulness in subduing threats.

... Why do I feel like its gonna bite me in the ass later.

We arrived at Sweet Apple Acres, we see Applejack sleep deprive face. She is in the air because the cart she was attach to flipped up right.

“Applejack... we need to talk.” Twilight said.

“Wha, huh? Oh, its you Twilight.” Applejack yawns. ”I know what you're gonna say, but the answer is still NO.

“Not to upset your applecart, but you NEED help.”

“Hardy har.” Applejack groans. “No I don't.”

”Then let Twilight and her friends help you.” I offered.

"Help? No thank you." She struggles with the cart. "A little more... little... there." She managed to get herself unstuck. "I'll prove that this apple can handle THESE apples.” She walks over to a tree and kicks it, but no apples fall. ”Come on apples…" She continued to kick the tree, but failed. "FALL OFF!"

“Applejack you are beating a fucking dead tree.” I said with slight irritation. Applejack looks up to see she was beating a tree with all their branches bare.

“Ah knew that.” She said. Yeah obviously not.

“No you don't.” I said back. Applejack glares at me.

Applejack walked further into the orchard, we both follow behind her.

"Actually Applejack…" Twilight started. "I had something else to talk to you about. I just came back from Ponyville Urgent Care and-”

“You know, I'm a little busy to get lectured right now, Twilight.” Applejack interrupted Twilight.

"But if you'd just let us help-” She was cut off again

"UGH!" Applejack groaned irritably. "No, NO, NO!” We stopped walking. “How many times do I gotta say it? I don't need no help from nopony!" She walks away.

"Ugh. That pony is stubborn as a mule." Twilight told me.

I just stare at Applejack as she slowly shrinks in the distance, I could walk away and do nothing but...

We heard a sound behind us. I didn't bother to turn around as I already knew what's behind us.

Twilight looks to see a mule. “No offense.” She said.

“None taken.” The mule replied.

Twilight turn to see Jumper missing from where she last saw him. She looked around to see Jumper walking to the direction of Applejack.

“Hey!” Twilight shouted, I heard it and turns to look at her. “What are you doing?” Twilight asked.

“You may have given up, but I sure as hell haven't!” I said. I wave my arm as Twilight stood there, watching me walk away.

A walk around the orchard later, I found Applejack bucking a tree, a live tree this time, its taking her a few kicks just to collect all the apples from the tree.

There's one apple left on the tree that Applejack is struggling to buck off. The trees in Equestria are shorter than the ones back home, I reach and plucked the apple off no problem. Applejack notices me and scowl.

“I though I told y'all, I don't need help.” She said, I give her a deadpan look at her.

“Yeah you did, I just chose not to listen to you.” I said, Applejack scowl becomes deeper.

“I've said it many times! I, DON'T, NEED, NO, HELP, FROM, NOPONY!” Applejack said angrily.

“Yeah, nopony.” I said, Applejack is unamused. “Also, not gonna listen. Try to kick me out? Good luck with that, I doubt you have any energy left to send me flying across half of your orchard with your strong kicks.”

I lean forward and put a finger into Applejack's forehead as my face turns serious. “I don't care if you don't need help, you need help. If you are going to be stubborn, then I will fight fire with fire by being equally stubborn. I don't care if you threaten me to send me to the hospital with a buck from you, you ain't shaking me.” I said firmly.

The rest of the day is spent me helping Applejack despite her refusal. No matter what she did, I stayed. Eventually she gave in knowing I won't budge, doesn't mean she won't speak out any displeasures. Applejack bucks the trees while I plucked some of the apples that haven't fell down as I will probably break my legs if I try bucking it. I've also helped her haling carts of apples and other chores that needed to be done, we got alot of work done than what I think she'll do alone. It lasted until 2 in the morning as I refuse to leave her until she is done.

Well, I gonna have to wake up early because tomorrow is the annual rabbit roundup. I should inform Fluttershy tomorrow as she is sleeping now, about how its not a good idea to ask help from a sleep deprived Applejack. I went back to bed and sleep.

The bright white light shines in my face. I just mumble and shifted, I cover my face with my blanket to block out the light and went to sleep.

I wake up with a yawn. “I wonder what time is it?” I grab my clock to take a look at the time to see its noon.

Wait... Isn't Applejack supposed to help Fluttershy with the annual rabbit roundup by noon?

... Well shit.

I hastily sprinted towards Ponyville after quickly finishing my morning routine.

Christ it has already happened, everywhere I walked I've seen destroyed gardens cause by a horde of baby rabbits munching on the vegetables and flowers off those gardens. There are alot more rabbits than I thought.

Later I encounter ponies lying on the ground, or more specifically the flower trio. And since this is Equestria, land of magic and coincidences, Twilight showed up as well.

"The horror, the horror!"

"It was AWFUL!"

"A disaster! A horrible, HORRIBLE disaster!" The flower trio each said.

Twilight looks around the area that is not ruined by the stampeding rabbits and is confused. “I... don't get it.” She said.

"Our gardens, destroyed!"

"Every last flower, devoured!"

" By... by... THEM!" One of the ponies toward a horde of baby bunnies munching on anything they can eat.

Fluttershy was trying her best to round them up and softly persuade them to stop eating everything on seen, but to no avail.

“Alright! That's it!” Twilight stomps a hoof to the ground.

I sighed. “That stubborn little orange blondie.” I rub my temples. “Alright, let's go.” I said as me and Twilight starts walking to Sweet Apple Acres. Oh yeah. “Also, next time build some fences around your gardens damn it!” I shouted.

Both of us went through the orchard and we saw Applejack trying to buck a tree and muttering something tiredly. Jesus Christ she looks like shit in person than watching the show.

We walked infront of Applejack as Twilight made a stern glare towards her. “Alright Applejack.” She said as she turns on lecture mode. “Your applebucking hasn't just caused YOU problems, it's over-propelled Pegasus', practically poisoned plenty of ponies, and terrorized bushels of brand new bouncing baby bunnies. I don't care what you say, you. Need. Help.” Applejack finishes bucking the tree is was working on.

“Ha! No I don't. Look, ah did it. I harvested the entire Sweet Apple Acres without your help. How'd ya like them apples?” She said proudly. I deadpan and Twilight sweat-dropped as we overlook the entire orchard.

“Correction,” I pointed towards the other side. “You harvested HALF of the Sweet Apple Acres without our help.” I said, Applejack looks to where I am pointing and her pupils shrink as she stares in disbelief.

Applejack begins mumbling. “Where'd all the apple...?” Then she passed out.

We ran over to her and tried to wake her up. “Ayo, wake up.” I said as I softly slap Applejack cheek until she woke up.

“Huh?” She said.

“You're done?” I said, half concern.

“Yes... I really can't do this on my own.” Applejack weakly said. “I... I need help, I could really use your help.” She pleaded.

I nodded. “Alright, Twilight you go get your friends. I'll take Applejack to her house, she needs bedtime.” Twilight nodded and ran to get her friends, I pick Applejack off the floor and carry her to her home.

“Thank ya, kindly. I am sorry Jumper.” Applejack said, I raise an eyebrow.

“For what?” I said, Applejack's ears droop.

“I am sorry for saying all those nasty things to you when only you are trying to help.” Applejack said. “I didn't realize until too late that I've been hurting other ponies around me from me working too hard.”

“Accepted.” I just said.

“I am glad to have you as a friend.” She said, I deadpan.

“But we barely even interact with each other. We are just acquaintances”

“Well now you are my friend now.” She smiled weakly.

I continued walking until I reached the house and I went upstairs to her bedroom and tuck her into bed.

“Thank you, Jumper.” She thanked him.

“No problem, need anything?” I asked.

“Its fine.” Applejack responded. “Can I ask ya a question?”

“Shoot.”

“Why do insist on helping me when I always shoved ya away?” Applejack asked, I signed.

“Because I hate seeing people, or anyone like this. I've seen and experience this before, one of my colleagues at my workplace cared so much about his responsibility that he neglects his health and help from anyone. He was sent to the hospital because of it.” I explained.

Applejack just stayed silent until she closes her eyes and falls asleep. I went back outside. We got some harvesting to do.

The next day, Me and the rest of the main six helped Applejack harvest all the apples for applebuck season. We finished real quick utilising magic and flying. Applejack completely recovered much to their relief.

After we finished harvesting every single tree in the orchard, we gathered at the farmhouse for some nice apple juice.

So yeah, Applebuck Season is dealt with, what hasn't been dealt with are the after effects. Yeah remember the bunnies that wreaked most of the gardens of Ponyville?

Yeah the town now has a food shortage problem. Shipments of food stuffs aren't gonna arrive until a few days, I offered my boxes of instant vegan noodles as I don't need that much.

I didn't expect for ponies to like them so much. After several ponies manage to replicate it and sell it to the public, yeah now its sold pretty much everywhere. I got payed for it since I was the one that introduced them.

Actually... why the fuck didn't I just do that earlier!? I could sell some human inventions and I'll be fucking rich!

I'll do that later, I went and hit the haystack.

Night.