Ch.2 Rattlesnake and Malachite
Author's Note
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Ch.2 Rattlesnake and Malachite
CHAPTER II
Rattlesnake and Malachite
“Thank you for choosing to commission Tiger-eye’s Timeless Treasury, and congratulations to you and your, uh...” The mare behind the desk gulped uneasily, eying the two mares in front of her. If Rattlesnake’s experience was anything to go by, she would say the mare was having a heart attack.
“My fiancée,” hinted Rattlesnake.
That seemed to help more than a drop of nitroglycerin. The assistant contractor took another glance at the commission form. “R- right, congratulations to you and your fiancée on your engagement, Miss Malachite.”
At that, Rattlesnake exchanged a look with the mare next to her. Her knowing smile was reflected on her lover’s visage.
She turned back to the intern, who was apparently very confused by the pair’s reaction. “Well, actually, my name is Rattlesnake, and she —” a hoof pointed to the changeling mare “— is Miss Malachite.”
“And soon-to-be Missus Malachite,” Malachite added proudly, winking at Rattlesnake. To make her point clearer, her hoof wormed across Rattlesnake’s wither and landed on the unicorn’s shoulder to pull her closer.
Realisation dawned on the assistant’s face. “Oh, sorry! Please, accept my most sincere apologies, Doctor Rattlesnake!” Her face paled at having mixed up her clients’ names and frantically tried to compensate for her mistake. “It’s just, uh, forgive me if I say that I wouldn’t... That I wouldn’t... Uhm...”
The poor mare trailed off, finding herself unable to finish the line, as any way it could end sounded more like an excuse than an apology. Her face was becoming even paler, which Rattlesnake wouldn’t have believed was possible with a white pony.
“That you wouldn’t expect a unicorn to bear a toxic reptile’s name, while her changeling partner goes by a gemstone?” Rattlesnake finished for her, offering a forced smile in an attempt to relieve her anxiety. “Don’t worry about offending us, though. I wouldn’t expect it, either! My parents were practically asking for something like this to happen when they named me ‘Rattlesnake’.” She nudged Malachite’s hoof off her shoulder. “And Malachite is fine with it, too. Isn’t that right, dear?”
“Yep, none taken. We’re good as long as you keep to your motto and have our rings ready by next month.”
The assistant let go of a breath. “Thank Celestia — Oh, I mean, and of course thank you as well.”
As the flustered girl tried to catch her agitated breath, Rattlesnake took a brief moment to notice her name tag. Talc Paste, it read. She wondered which was softer, the mare’s name or personality.
But still, this conversation had been off-track long enough. Rattlesnake turned to look through the jewellery workshop’s Prench window, through which she could see weather pegasi preparing the scheduled rain. At this rate, she was almost certain Malachite and she would have to enjoy their lunch date in a shower. It was going to be a drizzle, true, but it was still annoying to just think about it.
Plus, being a doctor at the city’s general hospital meant that she couldn’t just take a literal rain check for tomorrow, so Rattlesnake probably sounded a little irritated when she dragged the topic back. “So, how’s our form? Is everything in order? I’ve written down a list of customisations we want to have on the rings, so would you check if your jeweller can meet my requirements, please?”
She knew she did sound scary when Talc whimpered, cowering even deeper into her chair.
Holy myocarditis, she swore silently, now this is going to take forever.
“May I take over, Doctor Rattlesnake and Miss Malachite?” The mare had been standing behind Talc, silently observing everything. When she noticed the stalemate at Talc’s desk, she spoke up and moved to stand by the assistant, her fitted suit and gilded glasses striking Rattlesnake as a statement of business.
She was also smiling in such a convincing way that Rattlesnake could only nod to her question. Celestia, this mare was good at her job, that’s for sure.
“Thank you,” said the confident mare, satisfied. “Allow me to introduce myself: My name is Corundum Solitaire. I’m the chief contractor at Tiger-eye’s Timeless Treasury. I apologise for the problems you’ve come across with Miss Paste, but I would implore you to show leniency with her. She’s still in her internship, after all, and was also undertrained.”
She gave Talc a calculated pat on the back to silence her whimper and nodded towards the backside, urging Talc to take a break.
When Talc had disappeared into the employee lounge, Corundum pulled the chair over to sit down on it.
She turned to the waiting pair. “I thank you for your patience. Now, if I may ask for more of it, please allow me to first go over your commission.” She slid the form closer and inspected it with care. “Hmm, we’re talking about malachite for both ring’s centre stones, for very obvious reason, a romantic one as well.”
Malachite shone with pride at her idea receiving praise from a professional.
Corundum studied her reaction before continuing, “Then, we want chains for easier wearing, forged from sterling silver. As for diameters, I would presume that the larger one is for Miss Malachite?”
Rattlesnake nodded. “A changeling’s horn is thicker at the base than a unicorn like me.”
“Couldn’t have made a more important observation, myself, which brings us on to the choice of metal. We’ll use silver for Miss Malachite and…” Corundum paused and took a double take. “You want tungsten with three enchantments of protection on the entire ring? Can I — may I ask why, Doctor Rattlesnake?” For the first time, she was out of her sophisticated Canterlotian tongue.
And into typical northern unicorn tribe accent, noted Malachite instinctively.
“I’m a surgeon,” stated Rattlesnake, “and my department works with ER patients every day. If I want to wear my ring on a chain, I’d consider myself lucky to never lose it, but I can’t say anything about dropping and scratching.”
“Ah, right, I suppose that clears things up,” Corundum admitted, pulling her pen out to take notes in an attempt to cover up her embarrassment. “I’ll remember to consult Mister Tiger-eye to see if he can’t work with tungsten and let you know before you pay the front.” She pushed the piece of paper away for a little bit, squinting behind her glasses. “Next up are the accents. We are looking at melee diamonds, a conventional yet classic choice that will go well with the finest centre stone. Luckily, we have plenty of that in ready stock.”
“How much should we pay for the extra diamonds, though?” Malachite asked, a little worried about her lover’s choice. “We don’t really have a mountain of bits.”
At that, Corundum Solitaire just smiled, her previous moment of discomposure gone like a wisp. “Miss Malachite, please understand that Tiger-eye’s Timeless Treasury doesn’t sell gemstones or noble metals.” A practiced pause. “What we sell is the artistic touch that Mister Tiger-eye will bring into your life with unique design and perfectionistic becoming. Gold or silver? Only a choice of colour. Melee diamonds? Just accentuations.”
“Oh, that’s good to hear,” replied Malachite, clearly impressed by the contractor’s speech in addition to comforted.
“That, and also thank you,” added Rattlesnake, elbowing her changeling partner.
“With that matter settled, let’s continue to the design.” Corundum flipped the page over. “Interesting — no, brilliant, actually. An analogy of Miss Malachite’s wings? They’re as delicate as gossamer, I’d say, but I’m sure Mister Tiger-eye would love to take up the challenge...”
Not long after Miss Corundum had moved to regard the design of the shank, a pitter-patter began outside. Rattlesnake felt her ears droop at the noises.
So much for a lunch date. The old sandwich and coffee take-outs will have to suffice today. I just hope the sandwich isn’t too lousy.
Not bad. Not even half bad, decided Rattlesnake as she munched on her bean curd and lily sandwich.
After having their wedding rings sorted out, Malachite and Rattlesnake went to their usual snack place, only to discover that it was closed today, so they had instead taken a bit of a wander in the light rain, eventually coming across a café receded in the corner of streets.
Perhaps it was that Rattlesnake had caught a cold from walking in the rain and that the fever had already messed with her wit and bent her judgment, for Malachite had somehow convinced her to give those bean curds, which the changeling loved so much, a try.
All with but a peck on the unicorn’s cheek.
Despite initial reluctance, though, the only thing that had been lingering about Rattlesnake’s mind after the first bite was a simple question: Why hadn’t she tried this before?
She always knew Malachite ate it as a substitution for protein providers like chicken — or more often lizards, her buggy marefriend being omnivore and all, but no one had mentioned anything about how good the bean curds tasted. Oh, the juiciness when she chewed down on the pieces of textured bits! The bean curd had been marinated with spices and soy sauce so well, she might have chewed her tongue off!
She briefly contemplated the possibility that meat would taste as good to a pony, before stomping down on the dangerous thought. Malachite’s habits as a predator, it seemed, had rubbed onto her too much.
It was when Rattlesnake was almost done with her sandwich that Nurse Pager poked his head in. “Doctor Rattlesnake?”
Rattlesnake stuffed the rest of her lunch down her mouth, chewing and swallowing hurriedly. “Gjesh?” She tried again. “Yes?”
“Missus Heart is here for her check-up. Can I send her in?” Pager tried hard not to laugh at Rattlesnake. The cardiologist lived up to her name with her nasty snaps.
“Yeah, send her —” She was cut off by a hiccough. “— Send her in, and get me a cup of water while you’re at it, thank you so much.”
Pager was quick to close the consulting room door before letting out a laugh, loud enough to be heard by Rattlesnake.
Rattlesnake couldn’t help but frown a little as she sipped from her paper cup, filling her suddenly very dry mouth. The water tasted bland and dejecting, despite all water being tasteless to begin with, a quirk with all paper cups.
“Is everything in order, Doctor?” Heart wasn’t comfortable with how her doctor was reacting. “I’ve kept to all your orders. Seriously, I have! I’ve been going to bed early and eating far less salt and butter than before. Pyrite, too! He eats like a pony now, just so I wouldn’t feel left out.” The married mare entered an endless anxious babbling, but Rattlesnake was quick to filter her out, focusing on the case at hoof.
“I even feel better recently, but that could just be a hint the problem is going into a new stage, now is it? I hear from a friend that when a doctor becomes as quiet as you are now, there must be something very wrong. What is very wrong with me? Do I want to know it? Are you morally forbidden to tell me? Doctor Rattlesnake?”
“Just,” interrupted Rattlesnake, striking up a hoof with an audible snap, “give me a moment, please. No, your situation hasn’t worsened, and before you ask, no, I’m not lying to make you feel positive. Honestly, Missus Heart, you’ve known me for six months now, do I look like the kind of doctor who can’t break some bad news to my patients?”
That promptly shut Pretty Heart up. Finally free from the rattle, Rattlesnake went on with her train of thought.
There was no new complexion with Pretty Heart, but there was something wrong with her. The more Rattlesnake read through the entire log of medical records she had written, the more certain she became.
Of course, Mrs. Heart wasn’t alright, or she wouldn’t keep a weekly appointment with the cardiologist, but Rattlesnake wasn’t referring to that.
Yes, Mrs. Heart was an earth pony and her breed usually doesn’t get heart problems this early in life, but outliers weren’t unheard of. If everypony in a hospital got ill when and how it was said in the books, the life of a medical pony would be much easier, wouldn’t it?
It was the way Pretty Heart was wrong that was very wrong.
“So just tell me what’s making you frown that much, already!” demanded Heart, frustrated and scared.
Rattlesnake put the papers down and looked up sharply. “Fine, since I’m still in the dark, I guess honesty is the best policy now. I’m going to tell you, in untrained ponies’ words, what I find inconsistent with your symptoms. Whatever I’m going to say, if it rings any bell, let me know. Even a trivial detail could help me cure you. Do you get it?”
Heart nodded, trying hard to collect herself. “Yes, please go ahead.”
“Okay, so you know how they say a pony’s body isn’t unlike a watch?” At Heart’s hesitant nod, she continued. “Each part in a watch might have a different job, but when they work together, the watch will function normally. Even when broken, a watch should be consistent with how it’s made. Which part is broken dictates how the watch behaves.
“The same holds true with pony bodies. We’re built far more complex than a watch, but it’s still possible to predict symptoms from the problem, or to locate the problem from symptoms.”
“But now my symptoms aren’t predictable?” Heart ventured her guess. “You said I have heart problems. Is that still the case?”
“It is.” Rattlesnake could hear exasperation creeping into her voice as she told Mrs. Heart. “Your ECG results were clear on that. I can even show you where the problem lies in your heart with this model —” and she did “— but it’s not decreasing like it should, after all those medications and lifestyle changes you’ve taken through the months.”
“Is that… Is that an issue?”
“If a problem can’t be solved, it mustn’t be the problem.” Rattlesnake put her ridiculously expensive figurine back. “Something in your body is continuously damaging your heart, creating the problem in the first place, while also stopping us from curing it.” But that can’t be the case, either; I don’t see any tell-tales on her, aside from tiredness caused by suboptimal heart rate.
What if… This something comes from outside her body? I know it’s the Zebra, but haven’t I just ruled out the Pony? “Missus Heart, can I ask you a question? I will need you to answer to your best knowledge.” She looked into Heart’s eyes, trying to share with the frightened mare some confidence, even when she didn’t have much of it herself.
“You’re the doctor. I trust you have what’s best for me,” said Heart.
“Is there something you’ve been eating or drinking regularly for a long while? I suspect your problem might come from unconscious food poisoning.”
Pretty Heart squeezed her eyes close and sank into her head for a long moment, her lips reading silently. Finally, she opened her eyes again. “Other than my daily coffee that I’ve quit? No.” She averted Rattlesnake’s gaze, finding herself ashamed of not being able to help her doctor. “Pyrite and I have switched to tea after you warned me against coffee.”
“You drink it together? Does he have — Oh, wait, he’s a changeling, so equine physiology doesn’t apply to him. Ponyfeathers.” She sighed loudly, pinching with both hooves below her horn, rubbing slowly. “Well, I’m out of moves right now. There are too many possibilities to eliminate by asking. Who knows, it might even be an allergy.” She shook her head. “I’m sending you to toxicology.”
“Oh… Okay. Thank you so much, Doctor Rattlesnake, for being honest with me, I mean.” Heart gave her a tiny smile. “Where should I go, then?”
Rattlesnake tore her prescription off and floated it to Mrs. Heart. “Take this. Go find Nurse Pager. He’ll find somepony to take you to the toxicology department, if not available himself.” Noticing a sliver of doubt in her patient’s smile, she added, “Don’t worry. They’re going to draw some blood, that’s all. If the result comes out before three, you can come to find me. I’ll be off consulting at emergency after four, though. You can ask Nurse Pager to hoof your results to me and go home then.”
Heart nodded as she took the slip with her mouth. After a long pause, she walked slowly to the door, pushed it open, and left, her shoulders held low in uncertainty.
Rattlesnake laid her chin on the desk and took a deep breath, trying to clear her mind of the despair in Heart’s eyes when she was told of her problem. It was going to haunt her for a few days. That was for sure.
Rattlesnake sat in her room, alone, for a minute or two. There was work to do, so when she felt just barely energised from the break, the cardiologist straightened up and called into her pager. “Is the next appointment here yet?”
Apparently, it was, and then the one after.
After booking an operation with Mr. Will, Rattlesnake talked to two more patients before she was needed at the ER. Somepony was admitted for having an entire store shelf crashing onto them, and her colleagues at emergency were worried that crush syndrome might have started a heart failure.
And it turned out they were right. Sorting that out took another hour, so Rattlesnake was exhausted when she clocked out. Something nagged at her mind, but she was way too lethargic to pay it any attention. It probably had something to do with going to Nurse Pager, but meh, her next shift was on tomorrow morning, and since nopony came looking for her, it should be able to wait until tomorrow, right?
All she wanted right now was to snuggle up in her Malachite’s forelegs and laze off together on the couch. She could imagine herself falling into a nap as she listened in on the soap opera on the TV, her buggy marefriend snacking on her drowsy rays of love.
It was rare to see police in front of the hospital, but it didn’t register much in Rattlesnake’s head. It was a hospital, after all, perhaps somepony got into a fight. It had happened before. There, case explained. Damn, how she wished all her cases could be closed that easily!
She walked groggily all the way to the tram stop and hopped on a train home, not entirely lucid. Many riders were discussing some changeling stallion, or was it some newest criminal? Rattlesnake couldn’t care less about that. There was only one changeling in the world that mattered to her, and that changeling was a mare, so, not her problem.
In her semi-unconscious state, the unicorn dreamt of Malachite’s and her wedding. Her family was there. Father wasn’t entirely happy but still blessed them. Mother was smiling proudly, while Cuora busied herself eating the cake. As for Malachite’s family, her clustermates and former lieutenant were there, and then Queen Chrysalis arrived as well, carrying a huge jar of green liquid in the shape of a heart.
Then Queen Chrysalis began laughing maniacally as she and her changelings buzzed through the garden, soaking everypony in the green goo, which began to burn.
Desperately looking to her lover for an answer, Rattlesnake saw Malachite was burning as well. The former infiltrator captain opened her mouth to show her glittering fangs as she spoke in a weird voice:
“— end of the line, madam.”
“Wha—?” asked Rattlesnake, intelligently, as she finally woke up.
The driver wasn’t too happy to have tried this many times. “Thank Celestia you’re awake, madam. We have arrived at South Locust Street, where this train ends. If you would, please go off so I can get going.”
That was enough information to wake Rattlesnake up. “Whoops, sorry!” She looked around for a bit, before jumping up from her seat. “I’m leaving right now!”
“Sure, thank you so much,” muttered the driver under his breath.
The walk from the tram stop home was a quick one. Rattlesnake arrived in front of the door five minutes later, already feeling much cleverer than before her short nap.
Which was why she immediately knew something was wrong, when she opened the door. Her usual treatment of having an affectionate bug nuzzling her cheek upon arrival wasn’t there. Instead, she saw Malachite standing in the living room, staring attentively at the TV, some news on live.
“What happened, honey?” She called from across the kitchen, putting her bag down. “What’s the matter? You seem… worried.”
Malachite turned to her, a frown on her brows. “Oh, you’re back. Sorry, I didn’t hear you coming in.” She raised an elytra to point at the screen. “It’s… Something that happened at your workplace, and it’s sort of related to me as well. You probably want to see this.”
“What could have happened to make you go back to your ‘Spymaster Malachite’ persona? It’s cute when you’re serious, though.” Rattlesnake tried to joke as she walked to Malachite’s side, but any humour escaped her when she saw the news on TV.
“Changeling Love Venom Poisoning Found at City General Hospital,” it said.
Above the title, Rattlesnake recognised the victim and the suspected perpetrator.
They were Mrs. Pretty Heart and Mr. Pyrite.
