Yona Found Butter

by TheVClaw

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Profanity, Random, Slice of Life, Narcotics, Twilight Sparkle, Young Six, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Yona, Silverstream, Ocellus
Length: 18722

The Student Six are volunteering for the charity bake sale after school. Ocellus and Silverstream are busy making brownies, and Yona is tasked with getting more ingredients. Unfortunately, she decides to get something called "Cannabutter" instead...

As part of the School of Friendship's upcoming Charity Bake Sale, the Student Six were asked to help with getting everything ready. Sandbar, Gallus, and Smolder were working on decorating the gymnasium, while the others helped make brownies in the Home Ec room. While cooking, Ocellus and Silverstream asked Yona to go into town and buy some extra ingredients.

Yona does indeed find the items they need, but not in town. In fact, the yak found plant-based alternatives for all the necessary ingredients hidden in Sandbar's hiking bag. If only she knew Equestrian Botany a little better...

Published 2023-08-12 21:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2023-08-15 16:36:44 UTC

Chapter One

“Ummm… Ocellus? Are you sure that the sugar and flour measurements aren’t switched or something?”

The pink hippogriff winced worriedly, and her eyes darted back and forth between the two measuring cups in her claws. She kept double-checking the recipe book, but the confirmation of the correct sizes only made her beak skew more notably. It didn’t help that when she glanced back at her friend, the changeling in question had their insectoid eyes blinking repeatedly. It was hard to tell that Ocellus was having difficulty seeing, but they were clearly having some issues when they leaned in close to the recipe book.

“Uhhhh… No, that’s correct, Silverstream.” Ocellus smiled when they saw the correct measuring cups in their friend’s claws, and used their magic to float both of them out of her grip. “Yeah, flour might be the ‘foundation’ of a lot of baking recipes, but brownies depend on at least twice as much sugar to keep it dense and moist. That’s also why we need those chocolate chips, since they’re meant to melt and assist in binding everything together. Oh, and speaking of flour, you have a little on your face there~”

“Hmph…” Silverstream crossed her eyes for a moment, before rolling them with a scoff. She picked up a washcloth from the counter, and huffed with a smile while wiping some flour off the bridge of her beak. She took a moment to look around the kitchen space, which was thankfully not too messy aside from some empty packages and dustings of flour here and there. But since a couple of key ingredients were in need of replenishing, the hippogriff and changeling were left temporarily unable to continue their work. “So… What else did we need? I know that we already ran out of vanilla, and also chocolate chips…”

Ocellus tried to lean in and check a notebook lying on the kitchen island, but they had to wince and narrow their eyes with a couple rapid blinks. They eventually groaned and pulled back to wipe their eyes with the back of their hoof. “Ugh! Sorry, stupid shedding season… I, uhh… I think we’re also out of cooking oil.”

“Alright, umm… thanks.” Silverstream almost wanted to apologize for accidentally making Ocellus strain their eyes. But instead, she breathed out silently and glanced over at the clock on the wall. “Well, the Ponyville Marketplace doesn’t close for a couple more hours, so I doubt Yona will have much issue getting everything in time.”

Just in that moment, the door nearby opened up. Silverstream and Ocellus glanced over at the doorway, but it was an orange dragoness who entered from the other end of the classroom. Smolder was wearing a backpack as she walked past the rows of desks, and she poked her head through one of the openings in the partition that separated the class from the multiple Home-Ec kitchens. “Hey, guys! Starlight asked me to come down here and check on the brownie situation. Although…”

The dragoness paused briefly enough to sniff the air, and smiled with a satisfied sigh. Ocellus and Silverstream may have been in the room for a while baking, but Smolder was hit with that rich, chocolatey scent as soon as she stepped inside. “It definitely smells like you’re making progress!”

“Yeah, we have the first couple pans baking as we speak…” Ocellus pointed over to two of the baking ovens, which had their lights on to indicate being in use. However, they then pointed to a couple of large mixing bowls, as well as some pre-greased baking pans that were currently empty. “Right now, we’re waiting for Yona to come back from the market with some key ingredients we ran out of.”

“Oh, really?” Smolder quickly took off her backpack, and began to rifle through the contents inside. “Wait, I might have a couple candy-bars in here if you need them.”

“Ooh!” Silverstream’s face lit up before walking over to the dragon. “Maybe we can put them in the food-processor to substitute as chocolate chips!”

“Hmmm… Actually, that might work.” Ocellus used their magic to float out the candy bars from Smolder’s bag, but hummed with uncertainty upon reading the wrappers upclose. “Wait… Actually no, these have peanuts in them. Sorry.”

“Ahh, I should’ve known…” Smolder tucked the bars back into her bag, while Silverstream groaned with a disappointed pout. She looked back at Ocellus with slight concern. “Uhhh, you alright without your glasses, ‘Cell? Nurse Redheart said not to strain your eyes while you’re still shedding.”

“I’m fine, Smolder…” Ocellus sighed and walked back to the counter to reassess their remaining ingredients. Unfortunately, Silverstream could see the dragoness shooting them a suspicious stare.

“You really wanna say that after last night? Because I remember you needing my help getting all the crusty stuff off with a q-tip.”

“Oh, eww! EWWW!” Silverstream backed away with both claws up in disgust. She pointed over at Ocellus and added, “We’re literally making brownies, come on!”

“Just saying, you should probably double-check anything they read, alright? They almost walked into the men’s room this morning.”

“And how do you know that was an ‘accident,’ hmm?” Ocellus was quick to turn around and stare Smolder down. If it wasn’t for the Changeling’s compound eyes twitching with a painful wince, that question would’ve likely made Smolder second-guess her wording. But instead, Smolder held up a claw with two digits sticking out.

“How many claws am I holding up right now, Ocellus? And no shape-shifting either!”

“Ugh!” Ocellus just turned away with a light huff. Smolder scoffed to herself, but thankfully remained silent before glancing back at the doorway.

“Uhhh… wait, you said that Yona went into town?” She turned back to the others in confusion. “Because I walked into her a few min…”

Before Smolder could finish her statement, she and the others overheard some familiar rumbling from the hallway outside. The sounds of heavy, clomping hooves were scuttering towards the home-ec room at a frantic pace, until the floor underneath the students began to vibrate. It wasn’t until hearing the hooves skidding against the crystal floors that the three saw who appeared with an excited grin.

“YONA FOUND BUTTER!!” The burly brown yak was smiling as wide as could be, and held up a large grocery bag with several items inside. She proudly trotted into the classroom with the bag clutched in her muzzle. Meanwhile, Smolder just shrugged her shoulders and forgot what she was about to say.

“Oh, thank goodness!” Ocellus lit up their horn and floated the bag towards the kitchen counter. “You got the other stuff too?”

“Yaks best at gathering supplies for delicate missions! Yona got butter, vanilla, AND chocolate chips in record time! Oh, yak also borrowed Sandbar’s cereal to snack on~”

“Ooh, good idea! That can keep us from eating our sales.” Silverstream looked in Yona’s bag to inspect the items herself. She hummed with a tilted head, not recognizing any of those brands from the grocery store. “Hmmm…”

“Well, alright then! I guess there’s nothing to worry about.” Smolder readjusted the straps on her backpack, and gave a polite wave before making her leave. “Starlight needs me to finish up the decorations in the gymnasium, so I’ll leave you guys to finish up baking. Seeya!”

Even though Smolder just showed up, Yona waved her goodbye alongside the others. She was too happy to get their groceries in record time, so she was already eager to get back to baking. Smolder was already gone by the time Ocellus went to check on Yona’s haul. “Wow, you actually got to town and back that quick?! I don’t think Gallus could’ve done that if he flew there!”

“Oh, don’t worry. Yona didn’t need to go to town.” Yona placed several packages beside the mixing bowls, which all looked to be non-perishable items. While Silverstream tilted her head puzzledly, Yona held up a plastic tub in triumph. “Yona found everything we need in Sandbar and Gallus’ dorm room!”

“Wait, what?” Ocellus turned their head with their brows skewed. “Why would they have butter?”

“Well, it certainly looks like it. Although I think this is different since it’s canned or something…” Silverstream picked up the plastic tub and read the labeling closely. The lettering seemed a bit cartoony for a dairy-based product, and also looked to be misspelled. For some reason, it was labeled as ‘Cannabutter’ instead of ‘Can of Butter.’ Although, that may have just been because it wasn’t actually a can, so perhaps there was some legal reason to skew the name somewhat.

Beneath that was a logo of a smiling cow with red, half-lidded eyes. Silverstream’s beak skewed a little with a hum, mostly because of how many “new” Ponish words were there to confuse her; she was still unfamiliar with a lot of pony-lingo, so she made a mental note to ask Sandbar about what ‘Kush’ or ‘Potent’ meant.

“Hmmm… Wait, is this plant-based butter?”

“Yep! Yona already checked, and there’s no allergens listed. It’s made from ‘Cah-Nah-Bis’ oil. Yak thinks it’s butter that doesn’t need to stay cold!”

“Aaaahhhh…” Silverstream nodded after reading the specific word Yona sounded out. Since she spent most of her life underwater, she wasn’t too familiar with most Equestrian plants; and because there were multiple green, five-leaved plants scattered across the labeling, she could only assume that’s what the ‘Cannabis’ thing was. She was still a bit confused about some of the package’s nutritional specifics, especially what that tag in bold letters listing ‘1000 MG per Serving’ specifically meant. But after double-checking the ingredients listed in the back, she didn’t recognize any of those items as being a listed allergen from Starlight’s guide. “Okay, hmmm… Wait, would something like this work for brownies?”

“I think so?” Ocellus was struggling to read the tiny labeling on one of the little bottles of vanilla extract Yona also obtained. It also had a green leaf proudly printed on the front, and was clearly labeled ‘Vanilla-Flavored Cannabis Oil’. Even if they weren’t dealing with shedding, Ocellus would’ve had some difficulty reading the bottle without their glasses. They shrugged and placed it back on the counter, not noticing the teeny ‘500 MG’ tag underneath the logo. “Well, coconut oil is a popular substitute for a lot of recipes. As long as there’s no rules about Cah-Nah-Bis, I think we could use this as a replacement for butter.”

Technically, there were multiple rules in the School of Friendship’s guidelines related to that plant; unfortunately, none of the three students seemed to realize that when they went to work. Ocellus began to pour half-teaspoons of the concentrated ”vanilla” oil into the wet ingredients already in the mixing bowl. Meanwhile Silverstream cheerfully noticed the large bag of “chocolate chips” Yona also found in her coltfriend’s room. “Wow, they had chocolate chips too?!”

“Yeah, they were all in Sandbar’s hiking bag! Yona has no idea wh--BLECHHH!!” As soon as she ripped off the foil-packaging that sealed the tub of butter, she reeled back with a grossed-out wince. Silverstream cringed when she looked in the open tub, and saw what looked to be a bright green substance instead of creamy white. They looked oven more uneasy when they took a couple whiffs from the container, which was rather skunky and smelled nothing like butter. Ocellus turned to see both of them pouting in disappointment. “Uhhh, Yona may have gotten spoiled butter,” the yak admitted sadly.

“Hmmm, is it though?” Silverstream decided to open the bag of chocolate chips, ripping the tag that read ‘Mary Jane’s Special-Infused Space-Chips’ before any of them could read it. Much like the other products, there was a number that warned how potent even a quarter-cup of the chocolates would be; but alas, since that number was also torn out of sight, Silverstream ended up pouring at least a few servings’ worth into her palm. She took a clawful of the laced chocolates, and popped them into her beak to chew studiously. Ocellus and Yona waited a moment before the hippogriff shrugged and held up the bag. “These seem fine.”

“Hmmm…” Ocellus took the tub and sniffed the “butter” themself. They groaned with a wrinkled muzzle of their own, but was able to shrug and ask, “Ummm… could that just be the plant itself? Because the expiration date isn’t for a couple more months.”

Yona took a hoof-full of the chocolate chips herself, and seemed hesitant to Ocellus’ point while chewing. She blinked a couple times with a peculiar look after swallowing, and asked, “Hey, Silverstream! Does chocolate have weird aftertaste, or is that just for yak?”

“Mmm, no I kinda taste it too…” Silverstream’s beak skewed back and forth as she licked her teeth perplexedly. The chocolate itself tasted fine, but there was definitely an underlying bitterness with an almost… floral hint of some kind. She couldn’t put a talon on it, but it definitely had a difference from regular chocolate. She then sniffed that butter in Ocellus’ aura, and noted, “Well… maybe that’s the Cah-nah-bis leaves or something?”

“Well, let’s hope so.” Ocellus sighed when they glanced over at the clock, and decided to trust Silverstream’s decision. Considering how much time they spent waiting for Yona to get more ingredients, they needed to really hustle to get the rest of the brownies baked. So despite that skunky aroma, Ocellus scooped the entire tub’s contents out into a saucepan. “I’ll get this warm enough to melt down before stirring it with the wet ingredients. I already added the vanilla, so be sure to measure out the…”

Before Ocellus could even turn the burner on to begin heating the saucepan, they groaned when they saw Silverstream and Yona dump the whole bag of ‘Space Chips’ in the dry mixture. A light cloud of pondered sugar and cocoa powder poofed up and made the two reel back coughing. Ocellus rolled their eyes with a small chuckle, and began to stir that green oil mixture as best as they could with a plastic spatula. Yona came up from behind with a cheery smile, and surprised the changeling with a half-cup full of chocolate chips. “Does Ocellus want the rest of chocolate?~”

Ocellus turned their head back at her with a smile. “Aww, thanks!” They took the cup with a gracious nod, and poured a few chips into their mouth while returning to their work. From there, the changeling just started to casually munch on the chocolates in their hoof while the solid oil began to melt in the pan. “Hmmmm… so, does Sandbar usually keep food in his hiking bag?”

“Uh-huh! Sandbar got Gallus and Smolder to take up hiking with him as afternoon hobby! Yona wasn’t a fan of it, but a good girlfriend respects pony’s interests regardless.” Yona pointed at the empty containers and added, “That’s not even all of Sandbar’s hiking food! Pony has candy bars, gummy snacks, and even big baggies of spices! BUT! Yona only took what we needed, and even left a note with some bits to cover everything.”

“Okay, I was just about to ask about that.” Silverstream moved the bowl of wet ingredients next to the stovetop, which allowed for Ocellus to carefully pour the freshly-melted oil atop the eggs and “vanilla.” They made sure to keep their horn lit up so the mixture was instantly chilled while pouring, and thus unable to scramble the liquified eggs. While the changeling poured, Silverstream was using a whisk to mix the ingredients together vigorously. “Hmmmm… wait, why would they need butter and spices for hiking trips?”

“Hmmm… maybe for cooking meat, perhaps?” Ocellus shrugged after putting the emptied pan back on the stovetop and turning off the burner. “I mean, Gallus and Smolder both enjoy it, and Sandbar has local expertise in the area, so maybe he knows a private vendor somewhere.”

“Pbbt! Oh, please!” Yona openly scoffed at such an assumption, and grabbed all the emptied containers which previously contained more THC than a Clawchella concert. Since those chocolate chips would take a while to kick in, the yak felt perfectly fine when she tossed the evidence of their accidental felonies into the trashbin. “No offense, but Yona know Sandbar pretty well. And Sandbar is not the kind of pony to help get things like animal meat…”

She then turned around to face her friends with a wide and caring smile. “Sandbar is one of the most honest, morally sound ponies that Yona ever met. And if Sandbar had any secrets like that, Yona would’ve known already.”

Author's Note

If you want to read the story in full all at once, I have it on my Official Patreon Page. Specifically at this link

Chapter Two

Half an hour later...

Back at the school’s main gymnasium, which was thankfully right beside the campus’ dorm buildings, most of the decorations have been strung up across the ceiling beams and high-walled windows. Colorful streamers helped to illuminate the space with technicolor beams, while carefully-blown balloons hovered in the air with enough helium to hold up the banner signs freely. Instead of just hanging it off the ceiling, Sandbar and Gallus figured out how to have them semi-suspended by balloons to float around with the banner, “First Annual School of Friendship Charity Bake-Sale.”

About half a dozen ponies were working around the large space to make sure everything was ready. All of the tables were already set up and arranged, with most of them covered with long sheets of tarp to hide the plastic containers underneath. Most of the baked goods had already been made, including the cookies which nearly took all night by the evening baking classes. All that were left were the brownies, but they were expected to all be ready before the main event began. Only two of the tins were out so far, which were thankfully the ones made before Yona’s little “Shopping trip.”

Because of that, the mood all around seemed fairly chill by the time Smolder returned through one of the open windows with a couple water jugs.

“Oh, wow!” After putting the last of the stock behind the bleachers, she took a moment to look around with an impressed whistle. She had been so busy hauling boxes of supplies between the gym and the main lobby, that she barely noticed how well the decoration duties were going. Sure, it was still a gym through and through, but it was easy to see that a lot of effort was being made to make this worthy of Pinkie Pie’s approval.

Smolder was quick to help a pony who was trying to reach up with a streamer with their magic. The dragoness easily took the end of the streamer and tied it to the ceiling beam, which made the mare down below smile and wave graciously. Smolder then flew over to the stadium seats across the gymnasium, where a certain blue gryphon was busy fiddling with the helium canisters and a clawful of balloons. “Wow, Gallus! You could’ve saved me some work while I was gone.”

“Nnnnghhh… I think Starlight asked a few ponies to come over and help out with decorations while you were out. Ugh!” Gallus threw down the wad of uninflated balloons in frustration, and used both claws to carefully fidget with the tank’s nozzle. He grunted briefly, but eventually sighed with a smile when he heard a distinct click from the container. “Here we go! The stupid child-proofing on these things is so annoying.”

“Ugh, tell me about it! It’s like those lighters Sandbar always bought in bulk…” Smolder rolled her eyes and sat down beside Gallus. She made sure to pick up that pile of balloons, and held them out for the gryphon to use while he started using that canister. To Gallus’ credit, he seemed to pick up a quick and well-practiced pace as he started to inflate each colorful balloon one by one, tying the ends and letting them float away across the gym.

Smolder didn’t say anything for a while, but eventually leaned in with a faintly devilish smirk. She discreetly whispered into the gryphon's ear, “Speaking of Sandbar and lighters… you know where he is?~”

Gallus paused and looked up from the canister, staring off for a second with a flat expression. He didn’t even need to look over at her face, since that cheeky tone of voice made it clear what she was specifically wanting to ask about. The gryphon exhaled through his beak, before looking back at her with a playful roll of his eyes. “Well… I was planning to get all the balloons finished before suggesting a little ‘walk’ myself~”

Gallus shot an equally knowing grin back at her with a perk of his brows, but then immediately went back to his work like nothing happened. Smolder nodded to herself with an antsy smile, and remained beside him to help out like a good friend should. Of course, while Gallus continued to fill up balloons back-to-back, Smolder snickered and suggested, “Dude, we should totally take a few balloons with us when we do! Could you imagine adding that with helium?”

“Hehehehe…” Gallus snickered and nodded his head. “Wow, I didn’t even think of that, but I already love it~”

‘... oh no… oh NO…’

Both of them stopped giggling when they overheard that faint, but frantic-sounding voice in the distance outside. The two stared at each other, before turning to the open window Smolder where just came from. They looked just in time to see a familiar teal color flash past, and that voice sounded much more like their vacant friend.

“... Oh no… Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh NO!! Nnnnghhh…”

Now Gallus and Smolder were looking worried. Sandbar’s voice was now close enough for the other ponies in the gymnasium to hear him. A couple of them turned their heads up towards the gryphon and dragon, which made her clutch her backpack a bit tighter than expected. Luckily, all the ponies turned to the closed doorway when they heard the sounds of galloping hooves and clanging door-chains. Sandbar’s voice also sounded much more terrified as it echoed down the hallway. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO!!!”

The doors bursted open like the stallion was about to object to a wedding ceremony. “GUYS!!!”

Sandbar threw himself through the doors hard enough to fall and skid belly-first across the floor. He didn’t hear any of the panicked gasps around him, nor did he notice any ponies when he got back on his hooves. He threw his head up and cried out, “GALLUS!! SMOLDER!! SOMEONE BROKE INTO M--”

His muzzle instantly clamped up, and his pupils shrunk in fear. He had left the gymnasium before Starlight Glimmer sent more students down to help, so he didn’t expect to see several ponies here as well. He jerked his head around to look for his friends, who were still seated high above and covering their cringing faces. Sandbar’s muzzle skewed uncomfortably with a pained wince, but he was thankfully unable to finish his words. After taking a weak and trembling breath, the stallion grew an unconvincingly nervous smile.

“... uhhhh… t-they uhhh… they broke in… a… a higher score in pinball than m-me… I umm… I worked really hard on… on that…”

Even Sandbar knew that answer was flimsier than a faberge egg, and he hung his head as he sheepishly walked off with an embarrassed chuckle. The ponies were all looking at one another, but none of them seemed too keen on pressing into whatever issue that stallion was going through. Gallus and Smolder were able to easily sneak off, and they got out of sight by the time Sandbar snuck off around a corner. The pony was soon grabbed by two pairs of claws from behind some bleachers, and was yanked away from any of the other students’ sights.

Sandbar found himself standing under several rows of shadows, with Gallus and Smolder looming over him worriedly. Neither of them seemed mad or upset, but their friend’s behavior was definitely leaving them on edge. Gallus was looking around to make sure nopony was too close or able to eavesdrop on them. Meanwhile, Smolder leaned in and whispered in a firm tone, “Dude… what the heck happened?”

Sandbar closed his eyes to take a couple calming breaths. Unfortunately, he still appeared rightfully freaked-out when he hissed back at her, “Someone broke into our dorm and stole from my bag!”

With the way he emphasized that last word, it seemed that Sandbar wasn’t talking his regular schoolbag. Smolder seemed to know the distinction too, as her eyes immediately shot wide-open with a silent gasp. Gallus whipped his head back at him with an equally mortified look. “W-What!? You… You mean the bag?”

“Yes, I mean THE bag!” Sandbar clenched his eyes shut and tried to control his breathing. He was looking around just as paranoid as his friends. “I don’t know how much they took, but it was a lot. Right now I need your guys’ help to get a new hiding spot, okay!?”

“Shit!” Smolder winced and hoped that nopony away from the bleachers heard her say that. “Ugh… Okay, how about I come with you while Gallus stays here? It’d be too suspicious if we all left at once.”

“Wait, did they only take some of your stash?” Gallus leaned in and narrowed his eyes in confusion. “Like… what did they actually take?”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes in frustration. “What the?! I don’t know, dude! I know that my chocolate edibles AND the vanilla hash oil is missing! The cannabutter too…”

Smolder blinked a couple times. Her eyes began to widen slowly. She looked away from the guys, but the gears in her head were clearly turning enough for them to notice. By the time Gallus and Sandbar realized how silent she got, the dragon’s pupils shrunk to the size of two near-invisible slits.

In her head, Smolder kept hearing her friend’s cheerful declaration not too long ago:

… ‘Yona Found Butter!’

… ‘Yona Found Butter!’

… ‘Yona Found Butter!’

“... Yona found butter.”

Smolder almost didn’t realize she said that out-loud, since her voice came out in a petrified creak. Sandbar and Gallus looked at each other for a second in confusion. “Huh?!”

“YONA FOUND BUTTER!!!”

Smolder flew out of the gymnasium like it was on fire, nearly breaking off a few of the bleacher seats in the process. She barreled out through the open window, leaving the half-dozen other volunteers puzzled and stunned in place. Sandbar and Gallus had no idea what she was talking about, but her certainty was enough to worry both of them immensely. Despite not knowing where she flew off to, the stallion and gryphon were able to make a hasty escape through a back door to track her down…

In less than a couple minutes, Smolder managed to reach the outside of Sandbar and Gallus’ dorm room. She was already given an emergency copy of their key a while back, so she easily unlocked the door herself. Smolder closed the door behind her, and reached into the back of the tiny closet to find an old hiking bag. The zipper was still undone, so she just lifted the top flap and tried to look through carefully. “Nnnnghhh, come on! Is it here?! I need to make sure before…”

Smolder gasped, and her face paled when she pulled out a sheet of paper that was left inside by someone else. It was then that Gallus and Sandbar arrived back at their dorm, and yelped out in surprise of seeing her there. The dragoness looked like she wanted to strangle Sandbar when she held up the note. “DUDE, YOUR GIRLFRIEND DID IT!”

“WHAT?!?” Both guys shouted that at the same time, with Sandbar being the one to quickly snatch that paper from Smolder’s claw. As soon as he saw that scraggly hoofwriting, his expression turned to that of complete horror:

DEAR SANDBAR

YAK OWE PONY:

-1 CAN OF BUTTER

-1 BAG CHOCOLATE CHIPS

-TOO VANILLAS

ALSO, YONA STEPPED ON PLATE ON FLOOR AND BROKE IT (sorry)

ALSO ALSO, YONA OWES SANDBAR KISS :)

Sandbar almost put down the note before noticing something hastily written on the bottom of the page:

and cereal

“URRRRRGHHHH!!!” Gallus groaned hard with his face in his claws. Sandbar fell to his rump in a terrified stupor, landing right beside that broken plate he forgot to pick up the other day. Meanwhile, Smolder had to lean against the wall to keep herself standing; but alas, her knees were quivering in dread as she clutched her chest and tried not to hyperventilate.

“Oh no… Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no…” She turned to face her friends with a look of fear neither of them had ever seen on a dragon before. Her grim stare of mortal realization was enough to make the guys’ blood run nearly as cold as hers. She almost looked like she wanted to cry, but she thankfully held that back with a strong resolve as she sniffed strongly. Her exhale still came out close to a sob, but she pointed right at the door and spoke with a deathly serious tone. “G-Guys… We need to stop those brownies from leaving the kitchen. Right. NOW.”

“B-Brownies?” asked Sandbar with a tilt of his head. “You mean for the…”

In that split-second of realization, never did three students exit a room so quickly. Sandbar kicked his hiking bag to the back of his closet, and was the last to rush out of the dorm behind Gallus and Smolder. The dragon and gryphon flew at mach-one speeds down the hallway, ignoring all school rules as they brushed past other students and gusted wayward papers all around. Of course, Sandbar didn’t really help their frantic nature as he ran like a banshee behind them like a high-speed chase.

The three booked it across campus like Tarturus itself was about to open up. Smolder soared like an eagle across the open campus towards the Home Ec building. Gallus grabbed hold of Sandbar, and pulled him into the air so he wouldn’t get left behind in the dust. Smolder only paused long enough to hold the door for her friends, but all three were panicking in unison when they rushed down the hallway.

Unfortunately, despite the fact that they reached the Home Ec room in record time, the trio gasped when they skidded through the doorway and found an empty kitchen.

The rich, velvety aroma of chocolate was lingering in the air, while the room felt several degrees hotter from that recently-used oven. The mixing bowls were all cleaned and placed in the drying racks by the sink. The baking pans were empty as well, but were still cooling on top of the stovetop with dark brown crumbs around the inner-edges. The ovens may have had their lights on to indicate they were still hot; but judging by the dials all turned off, and nothing inside any of the ovens itself, it seemed that they just finished baking somehow.

“What the?!” Sandbar ran into the large multi-kitchen space, and darted around in a panic like a chihuahua that lost its owner at the store. “No! NO!! Wha… Where are the brownies?!”

“T-This doesn’t make any sense!!” Smolder ran around looking just as baffled. She knew that they needed to hustle to finish baking everything, but she also knew they could NOT bake that many tins of brownies in less than half an hour without her fire-breath. She even went as far as to try reaching inside each individual oven (thankfully something she could do without burning herself), but it was to no avail. Even though not enough time had passed, the girls somehow miraculously finished baking everything already…

“Something’s not right.” Gallus was still standing outside the kitchen space, but he seemed equally as unnerved while looking around the classroom adjacent to it. Most of the desks were empty, save for the few closest to the partition wall between the class and kitchen. A couple key items left behind were enough to warrant concern from Gallus, as well as Smolder and Sandbar when he pointed them out. Ocellus’ stack of books were left beside their satchel, neither of which the changeling ever left unguarded. In addition, a couple empty plastic wrappers were left on one of the seats. Sandbar walked over and picked up one of the crumpled bags, which was quickly revealed to have been literally bitten open. Gallus looked at the bag from the other side and asked, “Is that… Is that brown sugar?”

“Oh no…” Sandbar winced with a sudden look of understanding, recognizing those teeth marks well enough to discern who could eat that in one go. There were also several torn sugar packets scattered on the ground around the desk, although it was unclear if that was from only one culprit. Smolder decided to pick up Ocellus’ books for a moment, and took notice of a torn journal page that the stack was holding down to the desk. The dragon picked up the sheet, and gasped loudly enough to get the guys’ attention. “Look! I think Ocellus tried to use this spell! That might be why they’re not here…”

The glossy page looked to be from some Magical Science text, and titled, ‘How to Speed Up Baking in Seconds!’ Most of the paper was large blocks of text that went over the correct calibrations to make the spell work, but none of that meant anything to the non-magic students. What mattered was the fact that Ocellus somehow attempted to use a spell that only Starlight or Twilight could easily pull off. The three students could only imagine what else may have occurred while their friends were still in the room.

“Okay, I’m heading back to the gymnasium to make sure they don’t put those out!” Gallus quickly ran back to the hallway, but stopped long enough to point at Smolder and Sandbar. “Let’s split up to find our friends too! Smolder, you look for Ocellus! Sandbar can find Yona, and I’ll look for Silverstream!”

Gallus then flew off, hopefully to stop anyone in the school from trying any of those brownies. Smolder and Sandbar took a moment to make sure all the ovens and kitchen appliances were turned off, but were quick to exit the classroom for their rescue mission.

Meanwhile, the empty containers of all those used ingredients were left completely untouched, and still inside the trash can by the time the room was left empty once more...

Author's Note

If you want to read the story in full all at once, I have it on my Official Patreon Page. Specifically at this link

Chapter Four

Meanwhile, in another building…

“Ummmm… Yona? Yooooooonaaaaaaa…”

Sandbar’s voice echoed out far down the darkened hallway, which made him gulp worriedly with a skewed muzzle. Unlike his friends, the stallion had a slightly easier time tracking down his girlfriend. After seeing that emptied bag of brown sugar, his years of reading detective comics prompted him to search for more clues. Luckily for the pony’s investigative skills, that just meant following the surprisingly consistent trail of trash the yak left behind.

Just outside the Home Ec room, Sandbar found an empty box of saltine crackers. One of the corners had a very obvious bite mark taken out of it. Further down the hall, he was able to find a trail of torn pieces of foil that led Sandbar out of the building. He eventually found an empty, half-torn box for fruit snacks that came in individual packages. He had no idea where that came from, but he knew that family-sized pack would do nothing for Yona if she had the munchies.

He found a discarded six-pack of root beer after that, with all the cans still in the plastic rings while crushed and hanging off a bench. He tried following the sidewalk past that bench, hopeful that he could find the yak somewhere around campus. Unfortunately, all that Sandbar did was discover another piece of trash outside the Cafeteria building. He groaned with a disappointed pout, instantly recognizing the bag from his dorm room. “Oh, come on! She ate ALL my cereal!?”

Sandbar had just bought that huge bag of ‘Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs’ the other day, but now all that remained was an empty bag with one of the corners coated in drool

Sandbar wanted to be more upset, but his focus returned to the doors of the cafeteria. His eyes widened slowly, and he entered the building in hopes that there wouldn’t be any signs of the yak wandering in there. But alas, as soon as he walked through the doors, he was met with the unfortunate sight of all three of the school’s vending machines in the main hallway being ripped open from the door-latches. Nearly three-quarters of the stockpiles of junk food were ripped off the racks, with only the blue raspberry-flavored candies remaining.

Sandbar gulped with a knowing wince. Yona hated blue raspberry products with an unnatural passion, because in her words, ‘Yona doesn’t trust any food with colors that lie. Food has no reason to lie!’

Considering how that was her mindset while sober, Sandbar could only anticipate whatever she might have to say now. And just past the wrecked vending machines, a much more obvious trail of wrappers and empty bottles led down the hallway he was currently trotting down…

“Yonaaaaaaa…” He looked around frantically, but it seemed that no ponies were in this building while the bake sale was underway. He wanted to be grateful for that, but the emptiness of the spacious halls made him feel like he was about to star in his own horror movie scene. It didn’t help that the trail of garbage was leading him towards a darker portion of the hallways where the candles weren’t lit…

And to make matters worse, Sandbar froze when he heard some muffled grumbling from within the wall of darkness.

“Mmphhh… Mlem mlem mlem… Mmmmmmm~”

He closed his eyes tightly for a second, but breathed out before opening his muzzle. “Y-Yona?”

“Hmmm?” Her voice became much clearer after she cleared her throat. “Oh, Sandbar! Come on! Yak needs to hide evidence!”

He then heard more intense noises from Yona’s direction, composed mostly of wet slurps and something crunchy being broken repeatedly. He took a deep breath, and kept his muzzle tightly clasped shut when he stepped forward. When he ventured into the darkness, his eyes were slowly able to readjust to see the large moving figure huddled near a corner. Sandbar reached into his saddlebag, and used his trusty lighter to re-light one of the candles hanging on the wall. As soon as the hallway was reilluminated, he jolted back with a startled, “Nnnnghhh!!”

Yona was looking up at him wide-eyed, but she didn’t remove that pint-sized cup of ice cream wrapped around her muzzle. She also didn’t stop lapping up the contents inside, which somehow had something crunchy enough to make Sandbar’s ears twitch. She eventually pulled her face back with a sloppy-sounding squish, leaving her muzzle completely caked in melted vanilla and weird chunks of something bright-orange. She held out the devoured cup for the stallion, not noticing his grossed-out expression. “Ooh! Yak made this just now! It’s vanilla ice cream, and spicy nacho chips!”

She beamed wide and pridefully, looking like she just discovered the cure for cancer. Meanwhile, Sandbar reluctantly took the container with a wince, and watched as she went back to another opened bag. She had over a dozen different pieces of junk food circled around her on the floor, like some weird shrine dedicated to the Unholy Yak of Slobbery and Munchiedom. She wiped the melted ice cream off her face with the back of her foreleg, and then dove muzzle-first into a bag of pretzels.

“Aww jeez…” The pony bit his lip and placed the melted tub on the ground; he hated to admit it, but he probably would have enjoyed that if he was on Yona’s current level. Even with the limited lighting, Sandbar could see how red his girlfriend’s eyes were while half-lidded in bliss. He had no idea how Yona would react to the truth, but by this point he knew he couldn’t just pass off this behavior as being normal. Or at least, he knew that she would likely get really upset if he waited until she got sober to admit what’s wrong. “Ummm… Yona?”

“Hmph?” Yona still munched on pretzels with the bag around her face like a muzzle-guard. She still looked up at him quizzically, which just made Sandbar feel more guilty and avert his eyes.

“Uhhhh… I just checked the gymnasium, and… I was really hoping to ask where those brownies went.”

“Hmmmm…” Yona pulled the bag off her face, and sat with a contemplative expression that was littered with crumbs and food-stains. She tapped her chin with a hoof and looked up at the ceiling for a moment. Her bushy brows quickly flagged up as she put down her hoof. “Oh! Yak remember! Ocellus and Silverstream wanted to bake brownies super fast, so Yona got a book from Starlight’s office.”

Sandbar’s eyes widened, and his pupils shrunk worriedly. “Y-You what?”

“Don’t worry, Yona made sure the door was unlocked.” With a reassuring smile, Yona paused long enough to pour the remainder of that mostly-empty bag into her open maw. She slobbishly devoured the pretzels crumbs and all, leaving her boyfriend to stare at her behavior with a silent and confused blush. She made his cheeks turn even redder when she swirled her tongue across most of her face in a clockwise motion, before pulling it back into her mouth. She happily chewed on that mouthful she just lapped up, and swallowed so she could continue speaking articulately. “Anyway, by the time yak found baking spell, Ocellus and Silverstream went to the office with their batter in baking tins. Ocellus wanted to use magic, and actually got them cooked in seconds!”

“Uhhh… seriously?” Sandbar tried to show an impressed smile, but he knew that Yona’s word might not mean much right now. For all he knew, she could have severely misread that moment in her inebriated mind. “Well, uhhh… if that’s the case, where are the brownies now?”

Yona blinked a couple times while staring back at Sandbar’s wide-eyed stare. She took a deep breath, and revealed a more embarrassed look as she leaned away from the stallion. “Weeeeeellllllllll… Yona may have suggested we each try a piece to make sure they were good… And then after cutting, Silverstream went off to get plates for them. Ocellus uhhhhhhh… Ocellus thought they left bookbag in lobby, so they left too. And theeeeennnnn… huh.”

Sandbar blinked a couple times, and his eyes narrowed on her with concern. “What do you mean, ‘Huh’?”

Yona pouted to herself for a second, and then shugged her shoulders with a huff. “Yak forgot.”

Sandbar nearly gave himself a black-eye from how hard he face-hoofed himself. Before he could look back at her or say anything else, Yona narrowed her eyes on him with a similarly puzzled look. She blinked a couple more times, and hummed as she nodded to herself affirmatively. “Hmmmm… Okay, Yona have question now.”

Sandbar let out a deep, painfully long sigh as he dragged his hoof down his face. He took a breath before glancing back at her with a defeated wince. “Ummm… Yeah?”

Yona tilted her head curiously.

“... Is Yona high right now?”

It took a second for him to realize she actually asked that question out loud. But as soon as he did, his eyes widened to the size of frisbees. He was frozen at the spot, and left completely speechless while staring back at the smiling yak. He had no idea what to say, especially when Yona was staring at him so innocently behind reddened eyes. The pony eventually winced badly enough to look like he bit down on a lemon, and he slowly exhaled through his nostrils.

“Nnnnngggggg…” After that meager groan, Sandbar bit the bullet and nodded while his eyes were closed. “Y… Yeah…” He hung his head shamefully and refused to look at her reaction. “You… Y-You accidentally took my edibles… I’m really sorry, Yona.”

“PBBT!~”

Her chortled scoff was loud enough to make Sandbar jerk his head back up in surprise. She had her eyes clenched shut, and was shaking her head quite insistently. “N-No, Sandbar! No! Pony does not need to apologize! Yona didn’t ask and took weird food without permission. Only yak to blame…”

Sandbar opened his mouth for a second, but remained silent while processing that surprisingly mature response. While he didn’t want to just agree with her taking the full blame while she was baked, he couldn’t really dispute her perspective either. Nevertheless, he made sure to point out, “Still though, I shouldn’t have hidden that from you. I should’ve been upfront about what I do in my spare time, but… I dunno, I was worried how you would react. Like… culturally I mean? Ugh, anyway, that wasn’t right of me to do, and I should’ve placed more trust in you as a friend and as a partner…”

Sandbar closed his muzzle tightly, internally second-guessing the use of that particular term out-loud. While it may have sounded right in the moment to show his sincerity, he wasn’t sure how his girlfriend would react to being called a ‘Partner.’ Fortunately, Yona was quick to shoot him a smug grin while nodding her head. “Ohhhhhhh… Okay yeah, pony make fair point. Sandbar should been upfront.” She then gave another light shrug to add, “Still, Yona should’ve asked first, so… Call it even?”

Sandbar was able to smile warmly in relief, and nodded without hesitation. “You know what? I think that can work.”

He walked over to where she was sitting, and helped to lug the groggy yak back onto her hooves. She stumbled a bit, and ended up giggling by the time she stood up and had to brace herself against a row of lockers. She then stumbled back a couple steps, and bumped into the other row of lockers opposite in the hallway. Sandbar cringed and covered his face, his ears twitching from the loud clanging she was making. It was hard enough that she likely committed major vandalism from the vending machines, but the last thing they needed was for her to get the two caught now.

“Sooooo… Sandbar…” Yona barely paid any heed to the circular pile of garbage she left on the floor, and she stumbled up towards the stallion directly. He tried to scuttle back from her, but ended up trapping himself against the wall by the time Yona got up close to his face. Her smile widened with a more flirty, seductive stare that made Sandbar gulp worriedly. The pony soon found himself pinned against the wall as he was left standing bipedally on his hind-legs, while Yona held him by the shoulders with little effort. She paused just long enough to see her coltfriend squirm with a heavy blush, which made her chuckle with intrigue. “Hmmm… Since yak now knows why everything feels so nice… Yona want to take advantage~”

Without warning, Yona lunged in and locked lips with Sandbar for a deep and unexpected kiss. Sandbar’s surprised voice was cut off halfway through to leave only a muffled hum. His eyes shot wide-open, while Yona’s remained deeply closed in contentment. She took full charge of the situation, and dominated the stallion’s maw as she made out with him with unbridled intensity. As soon as he felt that floppy tongue of her slipping past his lips, his entire body locked up while his eyes rolled back uncontrollably hard. For nearly twenty seconds, the pony was left totally helpless to resist Yona’s passionate makeout session.

Sandbar’s eyes slowly closed, and he was able to try kissing her back during that oral assault. By the time Yona finally finished kissing, she slowly pulled back with a couple strings of saliva connecting her lips to his. Meanwhile, Sandbar was still tightly pinned to the wall as he ended up gasping loudly for air. He was barely able to think coherently, and his face was as red as a beet while his lips were coated in the yak’s drool. Yona still held him dominantly, and waited for a proper response while smirking with confidence. She looked the stallion up and down, and grinned even wider from how much he was squirming in her powerful grip.

When she looked back up at his face, however, her smile began to drop when she saw how suddenly he closed his mouth. Sandbar’s face grimaced tightly, and his muzzle skewed back and forth with obvious discomfort. He groaned a little in disgust, before opening his muzzle just enough to spit out something. Yona gasped in horror when she saw a couple unchewed crackers hit the floor with a grossly faint splat.

“OH!!!” Yona instantly reeled away from her coltfriend, which made him fall forward and nearly hit the ground face-first. He was lucky enough to catch himself at the last second, but Yona was too busy covering her muzzle in mortified silence to help out. Despite her attempt to try something special, all she did was probably traumatize the poor stallion from ever wanting crackers again. Her eyes widened in horrified realization, before tears began to bulb at the corners. By the time Sandbar was able to get back up on his hooves, the yak was already waddling off with a low and sobbing voice. “Waaaaaaahhhhhhh… Yona sooorrrrryyyyyyyy!!!”

“W-Wait, WAIT!!” Sandbar tried to run off after her, but nearly fell to the ground from how badly his hind-legs spasmed under his weight. Even after coughing a couple times, his face remained deeply red as he struggled to walk with his legs closer together. He groaned a little from the strain and confusion he was feeling in places, but he soldiered on to get to Yona before she could cry. “I-It’s alright! Yona, please! I promise it wasn’t bad at all! S-Seriously!! Please, it was actually really ho--”

-CRASH!!!-

Just as Yona was about to burst out of the main doors of the cafeteria to run away from her shame, she ended up skidding to her side with a frantic fall to avoid the carnage in front of her. The yak yelped out when she saw the doors crash open hard enough to nearly break off the hinges. A massive brown grizzly bear tore through the opening like a sentient pitcher of artificial fruit-punch, and leaned back to belt out a mighty and triumphant roar…

… or at least, as best of a roar as Ocellus was able to make in their regular voice.

“RrrrrRRRAAAAAaaaaaaahhhhhhh…”

Just outside the cafeteria, Yona could hear Smolder let out a heavy groan. “Ugh, oh COME ON! Fluttershy didn’t even see you! Why did you change?! That wasn’t the plan!!”

“Change of plans!” Ocellus, still in their burly bear form nearly three times Yona’s size, fell down to all-fours so they could more effectively run high-speed down the hallway. However, just as they were about to attempt to save the day, they stopped and turned around all wide-eyed. “Ooh! Wait!” Ocellus then stood upright, still as a bear, and cleared their throat before asking Smolder. “Hey, say that line again!”

“What!? NO!!” Smolder stormed in through the open doorway with a scolding glare. “This is NOT the time to--”

“Okay!” chirped Yona cheerfully, not even minding Ocellus’ ursine form when she spoke on Smolder's behalf. “Uhhh, did you mean ‘Why did you change?’ or, ‘That’s not the plan’?”

“BOTH! Or umm… wait…” Ocellus furrowed their brow for a second in puzzlement, but quickly re-widened their eyes with another enlightened gasp. “Ooh! Okay, okay, uhhh… But my dear and sexy Smolder, changing IS the plan! AAHHHH!!!”

Ocellus instantly caught what they blurted out loud; and judging by how quickly Smolder’s face reddened in her frozen stance, it seemed that she heard it too. The bear was standing upright and staring down at Smolder with a look of horror on their face. Their eyes darted back and forth with their muzzle agape, and eventually came to an acceptable answer for their accidental admission.

“... Uhhhhh… I mean, ummm… SMOLDER, LOOK OVER THERE!!”

Ocellus quickly pointed a paw behind Smolder, which made her dart her head around to see what caught their attention. The bear then tried to run away, which made their paws skid across the crystal floors like they were freshly-mopped. They eventually got enough momentum to begin running away, with their massive form ramming against those busted vending machines and scattering all the trashed food across the floor. However, unlike with Ocellus’ friend’s attempt earlier, Smolder was actually met with something that allowed the changeling to run off.

“Why the heck didn’t you stop them?!” Gallus landed on the ground outside the cafeteria, his face tightened into a frustrated and impatient scowl. Silverstream seemed to thankfully be apprehended during their midair scuffling; unfortunately, that meant that Gallus was now holding a long, lumpy duffle-bag that was rustling around violently against his side. He was trying his best to hold the bag securely, but he was obviously struggling as the bag’s strap dug into his shoulder. Regardless, he seemed more concerned with Smolder’s efforts than his own as he pointed a talon at her. “I just saw like, half a dozen ponies running up to Fluttershy because of that!”

“I know!” she hissed while pulling Gallus into the building. “Come on, before they realize it’s really Ocellus!” She slammed the doors shut, but the commotion was still getting worse from both the other high friends currently not in bondage. Ocellus was bumbling at full-speed down the hallway, brushing away all the trash Yona left behind and slamming up against lockers loudly with every galloping step. Since the main exit was blocked by Smolder and Gallus, Yona ended up just following the talking bear to escape what happened with her and Sandbar. The two burly and baked would-be bakers caused the ground to shake under their combined weight while pinballing down the halls in a mixture of embarrassment and desperation. It was unclear what either of them were capable of doing, but it left a trio of similarly scared looks on the faces of Gallus, Smolder, and Sandbar.

“Mmmph! MMPHH!!” Silverstream was still wriggling around in the duffle-bag like a magic act gone wrong. Gallus responded by draping a wing over the bag so it was pressed up more securely against his side. It was at that point that his friends realized what he did, and were staring at him with their mouths gaped in shock.

“What?!” Gallus shrugged like he did nothing wrong. “She hides in confined spaces all the time! Remember when she spent six hours straight in the washing machine as a seapony because she liked riding in it?”

That may not have been the same thing, but it was similar enough to make Smolder and Sandbar shrug reluctantly. Plus, if it meant that Silverstream couldn’t join the others in their carnage, they’ll tolerate the forced bagging for now. They were just about to run off down the hall towards the others, but the doors were thrown open with enough force to make all three of them scream. They all turned around (which nearly swung Silverstream against the wall in the duffle), and were met face-to-face with Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle together. Several worried-looking students were behind the two adults as they went up to the three.

“Guys! Thank Celestia you’re here!” Twilight Sparkle lit up her horn, which helped to better illuminate the space as she inspected the damage already left behind. Fluttershy was looking down the hallway while the Princess asked them, “We just got word that a bear was just seen running into this building! Did you see where it went?”

“Uhhhhh…” Gallus was looking over at his friend for support, but they appeared equally as unprepared for this sort of scenario. They could’ve just pointed to where the trail of destruction was clearly headed, but they couldn’t exactly send Twilight off after their friends. Without even thinking, the gryphon pointed over at Sandbar and blurted out, “I-I was making sure these guys were okay! I mean, they almost got knocked over when the bear hit those machines over there…”

By some unexplained miraculous force, Silverstream didn’t move too much or make any noises from Gallus’ side. Luckily, Twilight only took notice of the damage left behind, and sighed with an understanding nod. “Well, I’m glad that none of you got hurt…”

Smolder and Sandbar didn’t show any visible response, but the two made sure to shoot Gallus some very thankful stares. He understood them well enough to give the faintest nod out of Twilight’s line of sight. It was by that moment that Fluttershy returned to the others. “Oh dear… I don’t know who that poor bear was, but they must have been starving! I think they were even eating straight out of the garbage…”

Sandbar had to stop himself from clarifying anything in Yona’s honor. Twilight motioned for the others to follow, and led the way as she treaded down the trashed hallway first. “Well, alright then…”

She lit up her horn with her magic, and made the students gasp when they saw a blowdart-gun conjure in the Princess’ aura with a sudden poof. “Let’s see if we can get this guy tranquilized and off the campus safely.”

She loaded the long tube with a large-looking dart, and hovered it close to her face while walking down the hall with a determined stare. Gallus, Smolder, and Sandbar were all trying not to shit bricks beside Fluttershy, who seemed more worried about the crashing noises off in the distance. The gryphon leaned in close to Smolder’s ear and whispered, “Pst! Did they say what they were planning to do?”

“No, shut up!” Smolder nudged him hard, not wanting to get caught whispering right beside an Alicorn. Sandbar was stepping ahead to try and get a closer look at the darkened hallways ahead; but alas, neither he nor Twilight could see any signs of Yona or that totally real bear. The sounds of metallic clunking and scraping could be heard a bit clearer, but thankfully there weren’t any distinct voices to identify the culprits immediately. Fluttershy whimpered nervously, most likely for the bear and not herself; Gallus took that opportunity to pull to the back of the group, luckily keeping his squirming duffle out of sight from the teachers.

Smolder instinctually unfurled her wings to better hide Gallus behind her, but walked at a casual pace alongside Fluttershy. Meanwhile, Sandbar kept looking between the trail of discarded wrappers ahead of them, and the blowdart-gun hovering in Twilight’s aura. He gulped while keeping his muzzle shut, and hoped more than anything that the weapon wouldn’t need to be used.

“I’m sorry you guys have to deal with this so soon to the Bake Sale…” While leading the way with her weapon drawn, Twilight looked back at Sandbar to ask, “By the way, did you know if all the baked goods are finished? I heard that a couple of the tables weren’t fully stocked yet.”

“Aaaahhhhh… I-I wasn’t working in the kitchen today!” Sandbar was quick to blurt out that fact, mostly because it was the truest thing he could tell the Princess at that moment. Twilight seemed to accept that with a silent sigh as she shrugged her head.

“Okay, nevermind…” Her eyes narrowed in concentration, and she took aim when she caught sight of a moving figure within a massive shadow. It was right where the hallway made a sharp corner, leaving a blind spot that the candlelight couldn’t adequately reach. If Sandbar wasn’t thinking more about his friends’ best interests, he would’ve considered tossing a light source of some kind into the shadows to aid the Princess. But as of now, he preferred to just play dumb and hope she’d miss any potential shots.

Fluttershy ran up to get beside Twilight, providing Sandbar the chance to step back and hide behind them. Gallus and Smolder came up to his side, but unfortunately not alone. By that point, the duffel wriggling against the gryphon’s shoulder was also making some muffled giggling that was hard to conceal. Even when he tried to cover as much of the bag’s surface under his wing, he was clearly struggling enough to fidget and grunt against her squirming. “Nnnghhh, come on…”

Even with Smolder trying to hide Gallus’ antics, Fluttershy turned her head for a second with a raised brow. Her head quickly jerked back with the sound of glass breaking with a loud shatter. With that sudden crash, the figure stumbled back just enough to provide a clear(ish) target for the Alicorn to focus on. She brought the blowdart-gun up to her lips, and narrowed her eyes in focus before puffing out her lips.

‘FFFFFP!’

Fluttershy gasped in a panic and shouted out, “WAIT TWILIGHT, NO--”

-Thwap!-

By the time Fluttershy got out that horrified plea, the dart had already been blown with precise force by Twilight’s lips. It was too quick for her to use her magic to stop the impact, and the tranquilizer hit that large mound of brown fur with a leathery smack. The back end of the dart stuck out like a beacon to identify a successful hit, just as the figure stumbled out into the candlelight more clearly.

Twilight, Fluttershy, and Yona’s friends all gasped in shock when the yak stumbled backwards with that dart pinned in her buttcheek. Twilight dropped her blowgun and covered her mouth to hide her mortified expression. Fluttershy ran up and carefully tried to dislodge the dart from the yak’s butt. After a swift yank with her hoof, Fluttershy tried to turn Yona around so they could see her face. Of course, due to her current inebriation, the yak’s droopy smile and red eyes were more than enough to make Twilight drop her head in unbelievable shame. “Oh nooooooo… Yona, I’m SO sorry! I’m so, SO sorry…”

“Oh, wait! Yak know where brownies are!” Yona’s head perked up for a moment, providing a brief look at her sober cheerfulness. “Psh~ Yona almost forgot! The brownies are cooling down insi--”

-THUMP!-

Yona instantly fell face-first to the floor like a bag of bricks. Everyone was left stunned and horrified for the first couple seconds following that fall, but the tension was instantly relieved when the yak let out her first deafening snore. Off in the distance, the sounds of more crashing doors jerked the teachers’ heads up immediately. While Twilight groaned and kept her eyes clenched shut in defeat, Fluttershy meekly tried to guess, “Well, ummm… I think the bear might be out of here?”

Gallus, Sandbar, and Smolder all sighed in relief. Even the duffle bag seemed happy as it chirped out, “Thank goodness!”

“NNNGHH!!” Gallus jerked his body to the side away from the teachers, and ended up stumbling on his hind-paws. He yelped and fell to the ground, thankfully taking most of the fall and sparing the hippogriff stuffed in his bag. However, for some reason when the duffle was rolled off the gryphon’s body, the zipper was able to come undone enough for Silverstream’s body to push against an opening and push it out wider. She ended up literally rolling out of the bag like it was some choreographed act; and with her wings instinctually sprung out, she was able to land on all fours and stand like normal. Her wings furled back against her sides, just in time for Twilight and Fluttershy to turn and notice her beside the others.

“Hi!” Silverstream gave a biiiiiiiiig smile, and said that like nothing was weird at all. Although, that may have been because she forgot she was still wearing those stupid disguise-mustache glasses over her beak. Her eyes crossed together for a moment, allowing her to see the frames from the corner of her vision. She gasped in worry, before clearing her throat and reintroducing herself. “Uhhhh, I mean… Haalllllow thaaarrrr~”

She accompanied that unrecognizable accent with a wide, exaggerated wave of her claw. Twilight and Fluttershy just narrowed their eyes on her in shared confusion, before turning back to each other. Both of the mares looked like they wanted to say something, but they were interrupted when they heard multiple pairs of hoofsteps galloping down from where the “bear” had disappeared. Several pony students arrived to where Yona was lying unconscious on the floor, while a notable trail of destruction led out from both directions. Twilight instantly rushed over to them when she heard a couple horrified gasps. “I-It’s alright, everypony! Yona’s perfectly fi--”

Another obnoxiously loud snore interrupted the Princess as the yak rolled over to her back. She sprawled herself out on all fours, but was still out-cold as her muzzle remained open with her tongue hanging out. Each time she snored with the intensity of an engine struggling to start, trickles of drool leaked down to begin forming a puddle on the floor. Among that slobber, another unchewed cracker somehow slipped out and joined the clear ooze.

“Oh, EWWW!!” Both Twilight and Fluttershy reeled back in disgust, while the sober friends all cringed hard and tried not to panic. They doubted that Yona could be blamed for any of this mess, but she definitely wasn’t helping things while passed-out. Sandbar glanced over at the new ponies who arrived to inspect the damage, most of them stunned and aghast at what that starving grizzly did to the hallways. While about half a dozen ponies went to check on the teachers or Yona, one waited until everypony was out of their line of vision to ignite in a quick gust of green flames.

Ocellus hurriedly speed-walked past Twilight and Fluttershy, who were too busy dealing with several students each asking about what was going on. Unfortunately, they ran face-first into one of the lockers with another “Ouch!” They then stumbled away while rubbing their head with a wince.

The Princess had her horn lit the tiniest bit, and was trying to subtly float away the blowdart-gun before anypony could see it. Fluttershy bit her lip pensively, and gave a sudden stare down at Yona which caused the students around her to turn their heads; in the split-second they all looked down at the yak, Fluttershy tossed the used tranquilizer dart into a nearby trashcan behind her.

With most of the group reunited, and Yona most likely to receive a stellar treatment in the infirmary for her accidental tranquing, the remaining five students decided to take advantage of the commotion they caused to silently exit the situation. While Fluttershy half-heartedly tried to wake up the snoring yak, and Twilight pinched the bridge of her muzzle with her hoof in frustration, neither of them seem to notice the five friends of Yona’s who disappeared from sight. Ocellus and Silverstream were bunched into the middle of the group, with the other three hurriedly escorting them out of the building before any accusations could be pointed towards the group. During the scuffle, Ocellus gasped and pointed back to the doorway they were just pushed through. “W-Wait, WAIT! We can’t just leave Yona with them like that!”

“Don’t worry, she was hit with a tranquilizer while you were out,” said Gallus while keeping a wing draped over the changeling’s side. They just gawked up at him and did a double-take.

“WHAT?!”

“Well, think of it like this,” Smolder quickly leaned in from Ocellus’ other side to point out, “Twilight just accidentally used excessive force on a foreign student, and in a way which also covers up all her symptoms perfectly! They’ll probably be too busy trying not to get sued by Yakyakistan if this news gets out. If anything, they won’t even question Yona and blame everything on that ‘bear’ attack~”

Ocellus opened their muzzle briefly, but then shrugged and gave a more impressed pout. “Huh… That… That actually might work…”

Gallus gave them a thankful nudge and made sure to say, “Nice save, by the way!”

Ocellus looked away from him with a flustered smile. They glanced over at Silverstream for confirmation, but suddenly reeled back with a startled buzz of their wings. “GAHHH!! W-WHO ARE YOU?!”

“OH!” Silverstream took off the glasses, which made Ocellus instantly clutch their chest with a hoof and sigh in relief. Smolder and Gallus both face-clawed, while Sandbar tried not to snicker under his breath.

“Holy… W-Warn me next time, okay?” Ocellus’ voice sounded rather flustered alongside their heavy blush. Smolder took that moment to stare them down flatly and cross her arms.

“Seriously? You’re a literal shape-shifter. How does that fool you?”

Ocellus huffed with a saddened look that instantly softened Smolder’s stare. The changeling looked down with a confused pout and muttered, “I dunnoooooo…”

Smolder just sighed and decided to let Ocellus’ anxiety be. They were likely dealing with a lot today, and the dragon knew how crappy it’d be to screw with someone who accidentally had too many edibles at once. She came in to take over from Gallus’ assistance, and soon became the one to escort the changeling with a leathery wing over their back.

The gryphon didn’t say anything, but he gave Smolder a knowing smirk as he nodded in approval. Ocellus closed their eyes with a chittery purr, and tiredly nestled in against Smolder’s side with a smile. She tried not to blush too hard, but her faint smile wasn’t enough to push Ocellus away from her side. Meanwhile, Sandbar decided to check on Silverstream and ask, “Hey, did you hear what Yona said back there? She mentioned something about the brownies cooling down inside something. You have any clue what that might mean?”

“Hmmmm…” Silverstream paused and nibbled on one of the ends of her glasses while pondering that detail. The group were a notable distance away from the building by now, and heading back towards the gymnasium when they stopped at a grassy section on campus. The hippogriff may have been thoroughly zooted with her eyes a distinct shade of pink, but she tried to think with her beak clenched in concentration. “Cooling down… Cooling…”

Gallus’ head perked up wide-eyed. “Wait, maybe one of the fridges?”

“No, it wasn’t in the kitchen…” Ocellus shook their head, and tried to think themself despite their inebriation. Their eyes closed while their muzzle scrunched tightly. “Nnnffff… I was… I was worried they would be too hot… I couldn’t find the cooling spell, so I--HUUUUUHHHHHH!!!”

Ocellus’ sudden and terrified gasp caught everyone’s attention. All four friends turned to face them with varying shades of confusion and fear on their faces. Ocellus’ hooves were clasped over their face for a long while, but eventually pulled down to reveal the wide and terrified look in their compound eyes. By the time they finally revealed their quivering muzzle, Ocellus breathed out shakily and spoke in a faint voice.

“I, uhhhh… I know where we put them…”

Author's Note

If you want to read the story in full all at once, I have it on my Official Patreon Page. Specifically at this link

Chapter Five

Meanwhile, Completely Across Campus…

Since so much was happening in other regions of the school, no ponies seemed to be in need of any guidance around Trixie Lulamoon’s office. It had only been a couple weeks since she earned her new job and title, but she was appreciating the perks far more than expected. The powder-blue mare was sprawled out in her plus faux-leather chair, her hind-hooves resting on the oak desk like there wasn’t a care in the world. Her cape was carefully hung up on a nearby wall-rack, but she wasn’t coy enough to be without her trademark hat. Not only was it impeccably stylish, but it helped to shade her eyes from that pestering bright fluorescent light in her office…

“Mmmmphh~” Trixie happily munched on a thick, fudgy brownie with a gleam in her eyes, and the corners of her mouth nearly drooling in elation. The baked goods were remarkably good, with a rich and velvety texture that made each bite more satisfying than the last. The only complaint she may have had was how thirsty it left her; but then again, she was fortunate enough to have a whole pint of milk on standby. Trixie’s magic grabbed hold of the tip of an absurdly long silly-straw adorned with blue, pink, and white stripes, while the other end was firmly lodged inside the glass bottle. Without even needing to lean forward, the unicorn remained comfortably seated as she sipped from her super-long straw to quench her thirst. “Aaaaahhhhhh~”

-Knock! Knock! Knock!-

“Come iiiiiinnnnnn!!~” Trixie gave a big wave of her foreleg to greet whomever was on the other side of that door.

When it opened up, both Starlight Glimmer and her new Head-’Mare’ Sunburst rushed in frantically. Both of them had panicked looks on their faces, with Starlight asking, “Trixie! What the hay did you call us here for?!? We just got a report of a bear tearing through the cafeteria building!”

“AND one of the international students was accidentally hit with a tranquilizer dart!” Sunburst tried not to sound too freaked-out, but he winced when he noted how obviously aloof the mare was acting. “H-HEY! Trixie, what was so important that you needed us NOW?!”

“Ohhhhh… this is the thanks I get for saving the day?~”

Trixie spun in her chair just enough to pull her hooves off her desk, but she kept sitting all chill with a toothy grin. Both of the other unicorns could see the brownie bits lodged in her teeth, as well as the partially-cut baking dish that was on the desk between the three. A large square had been taken out right from the middle, foregoing any of the edges and just taking the interior like a psychopath. Trixie leaned forward with her horn lit, and began to cut up several more portioned squares with a plastic butter knife. Starlight and Sunburst were still looking rightfully confused, and just widened their eyes and motioned for her to continue.

“I know that neither of you feel like I take this job seriously sometimes, but I do take matters in my own hooves when the situation calls for it! For example, I just discovered and confiscated four tins of pot-brownies that could’ve gone out to the public.”

Both of the Head-Mares reeled back in shock. “WHAT!?!”

They turned to see the mini-fridge beside her desk, which had its door wide-open to reveal three more glass baking pans packed inside. Nothing else seemed to be removed, but it was obvious that someone made room to store all of them for cooling. Trixie also used that moment to float out a plastic bag, which was transparent enough to show the empty containers left behind in the kitchen. She tossed it over to the two to inspect, who noticed the cannabis labels almost instantly.

While the two stood with their muzzles agape, Trixie just rested back in her seat with her half-eaten brownie in her hoof. “And like a good, responsible adult, I’m making sure none of this reaches the student body~”

“E-EXCUSE ME!?!” Sunburst looked utterly appalled at the Guidance Counselor’s behavior. “Trixie, are you serious right now?! Who the heck made… p-p-pot brownies on campus grounds?!”

“Oh my gosh, this is bad…” Starlight was looking mortified as she read the disclaimers on the back of the vanilla bottle in her aura. “What the… where did you find these?”

“They were scattered across the lawn nearby the woods off campus...” Trixie gave that answer remarkably well, and finished up the brownie with a confident smile. After washing that down with another sip of milk, she made sure to add insistently, “And I already checked the Home Economics room. All of the baking tins were still accounted for, so I think these were made elsewhere…”

Starlight hummed to herself in suspicion, and leaned in to inspect the baking dish. It clearly wasn’t the metal ones used in classes, and most-likely weren’t for the bake-sale; however, since the brownies were already cut, there was no easy way to determine whether or not they were just lifted out of a metal tin and fitted inside of this one. She took that moment to walk over to the mini-fridge, and pulled out one of those glass containers to inspect the contents; but alas, all three tins were already pre-cut with the pieces spread about, thus ruining any potential investigation.

“Okayyyy… Trixie?” She peered back at her with her eyes more narrowed. “Where exactly did you find these brownies?”

“They were in an unmarked box outside the gymnasium.” Trixie pointed to a discarded box beside her wastebasket, which Starlight could’ve sworn was there the other day. Trixie then said, “If I were to guess, I would assume someone tried to take the rest of the real brownies meant for the bake sale, and replace them with these as part of some ‘prank.’ But since I acquired them in time, there won’t be any issues! Well, aside from the lack of extra brownies, I suppose…”

“Oh, nooooo…” Sunburst took off his glasses with his magic so he could cover his face with a hoof. Starlight closed her eyes for a second with a frustrated grunt, but huffed before staring at Trixie more intensely.

“Soooooo… you’re telling me that someone just baked a bunch of brownies with THC-laced ingredients, destroyed the brownies our students made, and were planning to sneak these in to drug a bunch of innocent ponies in a charity bake sale?!”

Trixie just shrugged her shoulders and nodded. “Well… compared to the things I did, I would consider this form of villainy pretty tame.”

Starlight groaned and face-hoofed. Despite how flimsy that retort may have been, she knew that both of them were guilty of doing worse than that assumed plan. Sunburst shook his head and tried to regain control by speaking up.

“W-Wait a minute! Shouldn’t we, like… report this to the police or something? This feels like… a-attempted terrorism or something!”

“Psh! Oh, don’t be so high-strung about this!” Trixie stunned both unicorns with that dismissive comment as she waved her hoof. “What’s important is that they’re not at the charity sale. It’s too late to cancel that event, and calling the police now would only hamper the efforts of everypony working on it. Besides, if word were to get out of this incident, all we’d be doing is ruining the sale ourselves, and giving whomever made these brownies a second-hoof win.”

Starlight wanted to say something, but paused to look over at Sunburst in silence. The stallion seemed quite a bit perturbed by Trixie’s hypothetical, and ended up biting his bottom lip while lost in thought. After a few seconds, he breathed out through his nostrils and shot Starlight a guilty shrug. “Ummm… Honestly, I… I can sorta see her point here?”

Starlight sighed and hung her head, basically showing her agreement without actually saying it. Fortunately, Trixie was too busy sipping her milk to gloat or act too smug in the moment. The Head-Mare eventually threw her head back up with a huff. “Ugh! So what, we’re just going to ignore this happened?!”

“Well, would you rather bring the authorities here to investigate a drug-lead, which would most-definitely be reported to the EEA and Chancellor Neighsay himself?” Just the mention of that name was enough to leave Starlight and Sunburst frozen for a moment. Trixie took that moment to wipe some milk off her upper-lip. “Plus, you just mentioned a bear-attack and… a blow-dart? Let’s be completely honest here: Do either of you REALLY think that reporting some brownies will do more good than harm?”

Neither of them had a word to say in response. Instead, the two pensively glanced between Trixie in her chair, and those other brownies all waiting in the fridge. They understood how seriously those individual pieces could stack up to a massive felony charge, so the weight of Trixie’s words definitely pressed down on their paranoia. Starlight bit her cheek and looked down at her hooves, while Sunburst scratched the back of his neck with an awkward wince. The two turned to each other with unified looks of contemplation, but it was the mare who was the first to sigh and close her eyes.

“Ugh… N… No…” She reluctantly shook her head in response to her friend’s question. “I… I can’t see that ending well for any of us…”

“Or any of the students…” Sunburst feebly nodded as well, but he turned back to Trixie to ask, “S-So what, are we supposed to just eat all of these?!”

“Well, not all at once!” Trixie scoffed at such an assumption, and finally got up from her seat. “Oh, that reminds me! Starlight, I might need to borrow your vacuum-seal thingy to bag up the rest of these! I was just about to clock out and enjoy my three-day weekend, so I think I got myself covered~”

The mare walked off with her dish, and began to float out the rest of the uneaten pieces to place inside individual sandwich bags. She took a moment to point back at the fridge and happily proclaim, “Go ahead, take your pick!”

Despite the mare’s enthusiasm, Starlight decided to smartly close the fridge door with her magic. She and Sunburst thought about it for another moment, but eventually turned to discuss things themselves.

“Okay, so… You check on the damage in the cafeteria, and I’ll rearrange the bake sale tables in the gym. Got it?”

“Alright, that can work… So, uhhhh… are we also, ummm…” He motioned back to the fridge with a heavy blush. Starlight’s face softened enough for her to raise her brows in intrigue.

“Have… Have you ever…”

“N-No! Ummm… No, I… I never had…”

“Hmmm… How about this…” Starlight made her way to the doorway, but shouted out to Trixie, “Alright, I’ll come back here with vacuum sealer after I get back from the gym! And then we can meet up with you this evening at your cart. Will that work?”

“Alright, but be quick! I have no idea how long I have before these brownies take effect…”

As the Counselor continued to work as diligently as she could in her state, the other two exited her office to return to their other duties. Starlight made sure to give her friend a comforting nudge before they parted ways, and whispered to him, “I promise you, I won’t speak a word of this to your Mom.”

She then ran off, bolting down the hall so she could get the bake sale finished as best as she could. Sunburst began to walk at a brisk pace towards the cafeteria, but he couldn’t help smiling to himself a little in relief. “Hmph… Wow, she actually knows me pretty well…”

At the end of the day, those brownies ended up causing quite a lot of havoc at the School of Friendship. Not only did half of the Young Six end up higher than kites, but they also accidentally caused several thousand bits worth of damages to their school. However, given the circumstances they were able to just barely avoid, the group found themselves unbelievably lucky to have escaped the blame so far. They had no idea what to do with Trixie, who was basically the school’s wild-card and now in possession of several grams of pure-grade THC. But alas, by the time Yona was able to safely exit the infirmary, the bake sale was already underway with everything running smoothly; and with a heavy veil of confusion and paranoid hitting all six of the now-aware students, they were very quick to make themselves scarce after their pre-organization duties were finished.

None of the students were ever questioned. Sure, there were definitely a couple weeks when all six of them were utterly terrified, but there was never any knocks at their doors by police, or surprise tests to force them to pee in a cup. If anything, the only sign they got of anything being amiss was their Head-Mare and Vice Head-’Mare’ needing to take a couple days off for “medical leave” following that weekend. The group were able to eventually relax a little, and accept their brush with edibles as a precautionary warning. From that moment on, Sandbar no longer kept his “medicinal” recreational goods inside of an old hiking bag stuffed in his dorm room closet…

… Instead, he and the others decided to keep them in a private chest in their Tree of Friendship.

The End

Author's Note

I hope y'all enjoyed this story! If you wanna show your support for future projects, please feel free to follow me on my Official Patreon Page!

Chapter Three

For about fifteen minutes, all three students were frantically running around the campus in hopes of finding their undoubtedly baked friends and their baked goods. All of them made sure to visit the gymnasium more than once, but were fortunate not to see any new tins of brownies on the last display table. However, even after scouring most of the School of Friendship from top to bottom, it turned out to be way harder than expected to find the only hippogriff, changeling, or yak in a mostly-pony space.

Since Gallus and Smolder could fly, the two spent a good time soaring around in hopes of finding one of their friends on the ground somewhere, or through the windows of one of the buildings’ upper floors. Eventually, Smolder tried to focus more on the interiors around campus, while Gallus stayed outdoors and kept an eye on the gymnasium. Luckily, he didn’t see anything to cause alarm, and ended up landing on the ground with a fretful sigh. “Ughhhh… Dammit, where could they be…”

Gallus took a couple calming breaths, and closed his eyes while thinking everything over. He may have known Silverstream fairly well as a friend (at least, as far as platonic friendships could form in an international boarding school during school months); but unlike Sandbar or Smolder, Gallus had no idea how the hippogriff would react to ingesting any edibles. He didn’t have any confirmation just yet, but he honestly would’ve been shocked if any of them refrained from taste-testing the brownie batter during the entire process. And with someone as inexperienced with modern culture as Silverstream at risk of being accidentally laced, Gallus had to really think hard about what she would do in her state of mind.

“Come on, come on… Ugh, where would she most likely go?” His beak tightened in a tight grimace as he struggled to think in her mindset. She may have been straight-laced, but Silverstream acted just as weird sober as Sandbar did after a few hits of that batch called ‘Birthday Cake’. He recalled when the group surprised her with a trip to a nearby shopping mall, she ended up riding up and down the escalator for four hours straight. She didn’t even visit any stores, although Sandbar did buy her a slush to keep her hydrated between her bouts of overzealous giggling. Gallus shuddered in dread, as he could only imagine how she might act while inebriated.

Or even worse, where all those “specialized” brownies could be lurking on campus.

“Think, think! Nnnghhh…” Gallus closed his eyes and groaned to himself in frustration. He tried his best to clear his mind, and then took a deep breath before thinking of the first word that came to his head when he thought of her. As soon as he imagined Silverstream’s smiling face, Gallus’ eyes shot wide-open with a gasp. “STAIRS!”

He was fortunate to be within walking distance, so he bolted off fast enough for his paws to kick up a couple pieces of the campus’ manicured lawn. He ran at full-speed towards the outdoor theater, which had massive stadium seats which were basically a giant set of U-Shaped stairs. He knew there were also several towers around the school with spiraling staircases, but he couldn’t imagine someone in her state venturing somewhere with that many heights or sharp drops. Plus, it was a really nice day outside, so it was a safe bet she could’ve been enjoying the weather.

Gallus stopped with a sudden skid at the top of the stadium steps, with the rows of seats and the stone stage laid out before him. He was able to quickly scan across the entire space from his higher vantage, and his eyes widened in an instant. He caught a split-second flash of pink that disappeared from behind the edge of one of the stage columns. He flew down to the stage in a flash, and landed right at the column to find it empty. His head darted back and forth in a panic, his chest convulsing from his heavy breathing.

“Hehehehehehe~”

Her cheeky giggle made Gallus whip his head around, only to see another flash of pink from backstage. A single pink feather lingered in the air, and floated down to the floor in front of the gryphon.

“You can’t catch meeeeeeeee~”

“Oh, good Grover…” Gallus face-clawed with a pained wince. While he may have been grateful to finally find her, now he was stuck playing Hide-and-Seek. He let out a sharp exhale and put down his claw. “Silverstream!” he shouted into the darkness of the backstage shrouded in shadows. “I need to know where those brownies are!”

“You gotta find me first!”

“Nngh! NO!!” Gallus tried not to get too upset, and closed his eyes to take a calming breath. “Nnnfff… Silverstream, please… We really need to know where you left those brownies for the bake sale!”

Several seconds of long, uncomfortable silence lingered between the two after Gallus’ question. The gryphon grew much more concerned, and widened his eyes with his beak clenched in worry. After an awkwardly long pause, Silverstream’s voice chirped out from the darkness:

“I dunno, but I found a great hiding spot! Come on, try to find me~”

Gallus had to do a double-take as his head jerked back. “W-WHAT?!”

“I said, try and find me! Hehehehehe~” Silverstream remained completely out of sight, although it was hard to discern where her voice was coming from. Gallus groaned through his clenched beak, but eventually settled down enough to keep his voice from sounding too confrontational.

“If I may ask… do you have any idea where the brownies could possibly be?”

A few more seconds of silence followed, like her answer was being written down before being spoken out-loud. It didn’t help that she asked in a carefree voice, “Well, uhhh… If I did, I’d just say that, wouldn’t I?”

“Well, can you at least guess where they could be?!”

“Uhhhhh… Hmmm.” After that brief hum, Siverstream seemed to actually be thinking it over for a second. “Oh, wait! I was wanting to ask you a question!”

Gallus braced himself before asking with a slight cringe, “Ummm… Okay? Wh… What is it?”

“Well…” During her pause, Gallus overheard what sounded like several metal cans falling over and dropping with metallic clangs against the stone. That was followed by the faint sounds of her pawpads skidding against the floor with each slow and cautious step. A dark shadow outlining her body soon appeared within the darkness, revealing that she was behind a table the whole time. She stood upright, and asked the gryphon with a tilt of her head, “Now that you asked, do you know where the brownies are?”

“UGH!!” Gallus rolled his eyes before storming up to her. “Come on! We need to find Ocellus and Yona! I don’t suppose you know where ei…”

As soon as Gallus got up close enough to see his friend clearly, he stopped in his tracks with a bewildered look on his face. He blinked a couple times when he saw the hippogriff’s getup upclose, and could only close his eyes with a disappointed sigh and shake his head. “Silverstream, where the buck did you find that?”

Silverstream remained standing rigid, but was seriously trying not to crack up. She was holding back a massive chortle with her beak clenched tightly shut, and her cheeks a deep shade of crimson. Meanwhile, a cheap pair of fake black-rimmed glasses, with a novelty fake nose attached to the end with a bushy mustache, were balanced on her beak to give a fake disguise appearance.

“Gnnghhh!! Hehehehe… ‘Whoo eez zees Seelveerstreem? Do you have a crush on her?~’”

She couldn’t handle her own joke, and she clenched her eyes shut before laughing in Gallus’ face. The gryphon was definitely annoyed, but he had to avert his eyes and struggle not to snicker a little. Regardless of the situation, that goofy accent was pretty damn funny. Gallus reassessed himself quickly enough to shake his head before returning to the topic at claw. “O-Okay, let’s try to focus here! Please, Silverstream… Where did you last see Yona and Ocellus?!”

The gryphon hoped that his firmer tone could help jostle her attention a bit, or even snap her out of her high long enough to respond coherently. But alas, the hippogriff just scrunched her face in like she was trying not to giggle again. Her friend’s serious expression just looked really silly, especially while one of those veins above his brow wriggled and pulsated like a little gummy worm. Silverstream’s beak clenched for a moment with a dopey grin, before she narrowed her eyes and grew a more mischievous tone. “Weeeelllllllll… That depends, Mister Gallus. Do yooooouuuuuu… have any gummy worms?~”

She smiled wide and expectantly, as if she expected the gryphon to just reach in his pocket and pull out a clawful of gummy worms for her. Gallus sighed with his eyes closed, but refrained from shaking his head. Instead, he motioned back to the school grounds and said, “How about this! We can get gummy worms on the way to find the others, alright!? Would that work for you?”

“Hmmmm…” She rolled her eyes back while humming hard in thought. She also leaned her head back a bit, like she was hoping for a light bulb to be over her head to turn on at any moment. With her disguise glasses still on, she eventually shrugged her head slightly. “Weeeeellllllll… I suppose I could help you find this ‘Silverstream’ lady. Hehehehehe… Oh wait, THERE SHE IS! LOOK!!~”

She suddenly pointed a claw out behind Gallus when she made that exclamation. She startled Gallus enough to instinctually turn his head and look to where she was pointing. “W-What?! What do yo--”

“AHA!!!”

Silverstream suddenly jumped over her friend with an impressive flip-trick, and landed at the front of the open stage with a theatrical pose. Gallus had to do a double-take while frozen in a defensive stance, but then grimaced and shouted out, “What the… Why did I fall for that!?”

She leaned back and grinned all wide and cockily, before dramatically taking off the glasses on her face. She stood on her hind-legs and laughed maniacally. “Aaaaahhhh, ha ha ha haaaaa!!! Behold, it was me! You were talking to Silverstream the whole time!!~”

Even in her triumphant stance, her face clenched in as she tried not to laugh again. Of course, that just made it look like she was sucking on a lemon while the corners of her mouth were pulling upward. All the while, Gallus just stared at her flatly without much of a response. He hoped that she could get the hint enough to act more seriously, but he soon realized how fruitless that was when she was back out in the sunlight. With the glasses off her face, he could see clear as day that her eyes were a noticeable shade of red.

“Oh no…” Gallus winced and shook his head meekly. “Please, I have to know… how many brownies did you eat?”

“Uhhhhh… Brownies?” Her red eyes darted back and forth, while she stood still for a moment with a newfound look of concern. It seemed that something just came to her head, which was clearly alarming enough to make her smile drop in an instant. Her eyes even widened for a split-second with what appeared to be legitimate panic, which made the gryhon’s own eyes show that same concern with much more intensity. She craned her head away from Gallus’ fretful expression, while her beak skewed uncomfortably. “Hmmmm… Well, ummm… Well, you see, I uhhhh… HUUUHHH!!!”

Silverstream suddenly pointed to something behind Gallus with a panicked look. “OHMIGOSH, LOOK!!”

“W-What, WHAT?!” Once again, Gallus jerked his head around to turn away from his friend in a panic. “What is--”

“YOU CAN’T CATCH ME! HAHAHAHahahahahahahaaaaa…”

“GAHH!! WHY DID I FALL FOR THAT AGAIN?!?”

By the time Gallus turned back around to face her, Silverstream took that moment to fly off with her “disguise” back on. She took a moment to turn around and face him while flying in midair. While her wings fluttered erratically enough to make her body bob back and forth, she cleared her throat before speaking in that ridiculous accent. “Ahem! ‘Iv you vant your precious Silverstream, you must apprehend ze notorious Mustache! Othervise, uhhh… I’ll, umm… Zen I shall be the Phantom of the Bake-Sale!’ MUAAAAAA- HA HA HA HA!!~”

She couldn’t even think of a childish ‘Nose-Picking’ pun in her state, and just flew off after that overdramatic guffaw. She was quickly followed by Gallus, who frantically flew after her with a look of impending horror. As the gryphon chased his friend down above the school grounds, Silverstream’s maniacal laughter was loud and rampant enough to echo all across the campus for students to hear. Many ponies stopped in their tracks to glance upward, only to see streaks of pink and blue moving like pieces in a pinball machine in the sky.

Meanwhile, back at the main building of the school in the main lobby, Smolder hoped that she didn’t seem too suspicious while walking around one of the top floors with a forced smile. She was standing upright with her claws behind her back, and whistling innocently as she looked around like a hawk. After spending months with the changeling as her roommate, Smolder had a fairly good knack for where their head could be most of the time. And after checking their dorm room, the library, and the pond behind campus to no avail, the dragon could only assume that they were lurking somewhere around here.

“Alright, Smolder. Let’s think…” The dragoness made sure she was alone while muttering to herself. She slowly walked down a spacious hallway, and stared intently at every individual object that caught her eye. “Hmmm… Okay, where would a NonBinary Changeling go as a first-timer with several tins of fresh brownies if it’s not the gymnasium?”

She winced fretfully, since she was starting to run out of options that could feasibly answer her rhetorical question. Unless she wanted to start checking every individual classroom, Smolder knew that she had to find a solution fast. She poked her head down multiple hallways, but every space she walked past felt vacant. She was just about to head back to the stairs to go down to the lobby’s main entrance, but she froze in place and slowly turned her head.

An oddly large, powder-blue vase with ornate decoration was placed in the middle of the hallway.

If it was up against a wall or beside a table somewhere, it likely wouldn’t have stood out in Smolder’s eyes. But now with the dragon staring at the vase directly, it didn’t take long before the seemingly inanimate porcelain twitched a little. Barely the slightest movement, but just enough for Smolder to recognize her roommate.

“Whoo… Okay then…” Smolder let out a soft, silent sigh in relief while keeping an unoffended look on her face. Knowing Ocellus, she could only assume that the changeling was really paranoid right now. She slowly walked up to the vase with her claws extended out, showing that she had nothing to harm them with. “Hey, Ocellus? Is that you? It’s okay, you can tell me…”

Slowly, the vase started to rock back and forth the tiniest bit, just enough to allow it to move in a gradual spinning motion away from Smolder’s face. That caused her to huff with a flatter look than before. “... Seriously?”

The vase kept wobbling without pause, almost as if the changeling was trying to maintain a steady pace for consistency as part of their “role.”

“... Ocellus, do you really think I’m going to believe a vase can just do that?”

The inanimate object finally went inanimate again, and stopped moving for a moment in reflection. After an awkward bout of silence, a meek voice could faintly be heard:

“... m… maybe it’s a magic vase?”

“Ugh!” Smolder rolled her eyes with a groan. “Celly, quit it!”

She reached down and flicked the lid of the vase with the tip of one of her claws. It instantly went up in a gust of green flames while Ocellus let out a pained “Ouch!” Smolder reeled back from the plume, which went up for only a second before dissipating back to the changeling’s regular form. Ocellus was left standing with their head hung low, and with a hoof clasped over their left eye. “Smolder, you hit my eye!”

“Ooh, sorry!” Smolder winced apologetically. “Although, in my defense, sometimes it’s hard to tell where your features can be.”

“Yeah, that’s literally the point of camouflage!” Ocellus groaned before putting their hoof back down, their eyelid twitching a little and remaining half-open. Their compound eyes made it hard for Smolder to tell whether or not they were inebriated. However, the fact that the changeling was standing with an antsy twitch gave a strong hint that they were overly worried about something. After a brief chitter to themselves, Ocellus scratched the back of their neck and tried to ask nervously, “H-Hey! Ummm… Wh… What’s up, roomie?~”

They accompanied that first-time nickname with a very forced smile, which was more than enough to make Smolder stifle a giggle.

“Mmph! Uhhh… I’m fine, Ocellus. Although, ummm…” Smolder breathed out quickly enough to drop her smile, and she leaned in to ask the Changeling nicely. “I was really wanting to ask where you and the girls left those brownies you made…”

“Oooohhhhh… Ummmm…” Ocellus gave a strong nod of their head to emphasize their understanding, but their raised brows and unblinking eyes warranted some slight concern. Their insectoid wings gave a couple of frantic buzzes, while their body gave a paranoid twitch that made them briefly skitter off the ground. Smolder didn’t say anything, but her face tightened up with worry about spooking her shape-shifting friend. Regardless, the dragon’s silence allowed for Ocellus to tilt their head and speak with a guilty wince. “Well, uuuuhhhhhhhh… I’m not, umm… I-I’m not sure. Or maybe I’m just thinking about something else. It’s like, I was turning a corner, and the pan was still in my hoov--Wait, it was hands! CLAWS! I had claws! I remember, they were like… not soft or anything… they were crackly, like noodles in the box…”

During their babbling rant, Ocellus was looking down at their hooves while their words turned to confused mutters. Their horn lit up to engulf both their forelegs in green flames, before rapidly changing their appendages to that of several different species’ arm or foreleg types. A couple different dragon claws, some yak hooves, a pair of hairless-monkey arms riddled with tattoos, and even some tentacles before settling back to their chitinous form.

Smolder didn’t say anything, but she gulped and took a mental note to ask Ocellus about that last one when they’re sober.

“Ummmm… noodles?” Smolder blinked a couple times in puzzlement. “You mean, like… pasta noodles? Or… wait, what?”

“I dunnooooooo…” Ocellus hung their head with that prolonged response, which ended up sounding like a whiny groan. Smolder could only assume that they didn’t know what they were talking about either; or at least, they probably forgot already. They took another breath before looking up at the ceiling, and they spoke while tapping their forelegs together. “Okay, it’s umm… it’s like this. We were getting everything set up, and we just got all the batter set up in the tins. Now, uhhh… at this point, we were starting to run out of time, so Silverstream asked about baking spells, and I wasn’t sure because we were using the cans of cah-nibbus. Or uhh, a can of Cah-Nabis, Cah-Nah-Bis, or--”

Ocellus’ head instantly jerked up, and their eyes stared straight back at Smolder in pure mortified silence.

The dragoness didn’t say anything, and just bit her lips shut to hide her grimace. She could tell that during her friend’s attempt to pronounce that specific word, they may have realized their own mistake too late. Their head tilted to the side, as their expression became more grave and panicked by the second. But alas, Smolder merely sighed through her teeth before nodding her head. “Ummm… Yeaaahhhh…”

Ocellus gasped with both hooves clasped over their mouth. Smolder hoped that their reaction would remain at that. Unfortunately, the changeling quickly threw their forelegs down and blurted out with a freaked-out voice:

“CANNABIS OIL?!?”

“SSSSHHHHHHH!!!” Smolder quickly lunged in and covered Ocellus’ mouth. She winced and looked around, hoping for both their sakes that nopony downstairs heard them say that. After a couple seconds, she let go of the changeling’s mouth so they could breathe normally. Unfortunately, that also allowed them to freely hyperventilate with a hoof clutched over their chest. Smolder kept herself hunched in close, and tried her best to keep Ocellus settled down. “Yes, yes I know, Ocellus. It’s okay, we just need to--”

“Oh my gosh, no! NO!!” Ocellus’ panicked voice made a frantic shriek before covering their mouth once more. They sat upright on their hind-legs while using their hooves to fan their face. Their magic ignited to turn their hooves to big aquatic-looking flippers so the fanning actually worked. But even with that precaution, Ocellus was still panting rapidly and staring down at the floor. “Ohmigosh, this is so bad! They’re all going to know. They all know already. I walked past so many ponies. I saw the stares. They knew! I heard a giggle! I’m going to get caught! I’ll get expelled! I’ll get arrested! They’ll shave my head and make me squat and cough! I’ll have to us--”

“Hey, hey, HEY!” Smolder got right up in Ocellus’ face with a threatening hiss. “Stop that right now! Nopony knows, Ocellus. No. Pony. Knows. You’re not that high. I promise you we’ll get through this. Do you understand?”

She hoped that her intense stare was enough to get through to the changeling, but Ocellus was too preoccupied staring down at their fidgeting hoof. When Smolder took notice, they were waving it back and forth with precise, rapid motions like they were working an invisible abacus. Their eyes soon widened in horror, and their head slowly panned back to their friend. The dragoness looked legitimately scared when Ocellus slowly shook their head, and gave a fearful pout with their bottom lip quivering.

“Smolder, I… I did the math…”

That statement was enough to make Smolder’s already cold blood nearly solidify in her veins. Her brows raised with much more concern, while Ocellus’ face winced in growing realization. They had to close their compact eyes completely shut for a moment, before letting out a trembling exhale.

“... I ate three brownies…”

Smolder looked like she was about to have a heart-attack. Regardless of how “safe” it may have been overall, she knew that three special brownies were WAY too much. Especially for the first-timer, who just cringed and hung their head in shame.

“... Theothersatemore.”

Smolder sunk her head into her claws, which helped to muffle her frustrated groan. “Mmmfffffff!!”

“WAIT! I know how to fix this!” Ocellus lit up their horn, just in time for Smolder to gasp in a panic and try to stop them. But alas, a sudden flash of magic engulfed their body in green flames, and they were shifted into the body of Fluttershy; interestingly enough, the mare looked to have very red eyes, most-likely something Ocellus wasn’t aware of. They suddenly flew up in the air, and caused Smolder to yelp and reel back from them. Ocellus still spoke in their own voice and pointed to a nearby window. “I think I know where Yona went! Come on, you can follow!”

“Ocellus, why the heck are you wearing that?!”

The changeling paused while hovering in midair, and blankly glanced down at the outfit they accidentally included in their shape-shifting. Their copy of Fluttershy was not only wearing a tight black corset with matching fishnet stockings, but also a pair of kitty-ears over their head. They gasped and immediately re-ignited themself in changeling flames, removing that costume just as quickly as it was seen. They were still in Fluttershy’s body, but now fully nude while smiling with a nervous blush. Smolder had to close her eyes for a second and mutter under her breath, “How the buck did wearing less clothing make that less revealing…”

Instead of waiting for an answer, the dragon shook her head and let out a huff. She flew up into the air, and tried to speak to Ocellus with a carefully articulated tone. “Okay… Ocellus, you need to listen to me here. You don’t say anything while flying. Just go exactly to where you need to go, and keep a low profile. Can you do that for me?”

Ocellus gave a firm nod, while carrying a wide-eyed and determined, albeit pink-tinted stare. They then took a deep breath, and flew head-first towards the window.

-WHAM!-

“Gahh!!”

Smolder winced and sucked some air through her teeth. Ocellus thankfully didn’t break the closed window with their head, but they certainly knocked it hard judging by that sound. They groaned and rubbed their head for a second, but quickly sighed in frustration before unlatching the window. They opened it and flew out in silence, allowing Smolder to roll her eyes and smile with a slightly blushed smirk. She hated to admit it, but that bookworm was pretty cute while all flustered and clumsy.

“AAAHHHH!!!” The sound of “Fluttershy’s” sudden shriek pulled Smolder out of her thoughts, and she rushed out the window while hearing her friend shout out, “H-Hi guys! I’m totally Fluttershy!”

“Yes, that’s right, now come on!” Smolder grabbed hold of her friend by the shoulders, and forcefully guided them away from a group of confused students standing nearby the building and conversing to themselves. As the dragoness and “pegasus” flew off above the campus grounds, neither of them seemed to notice the sounds of a hipogriff’s cackling laughter echoing in the distance. Of course, even though Ocellus was trying their hardest to lead the way, Smolder had to stay close behind them so they didn’t veer off for whatever reason.

“Huuhhh!! Ohmigosh, I hear the ice cream cart!”

“No, Ocellus! We need to find Yona!”

“But maybe she wants ice cream?”

“Ugh! Maybe after we find her!”

“But the cart will go away by then.”

“I can fly! YOU can fly! You can just look for it!”

“Ohhhhhhhh… Yeah, that’s a good idea.”

“Ughhhhh… Thanks.”

“OOH! Those ponies over there are having a picnic!”

“NO!”

Author's Note

If you want to read the story in full all at once, I have it on my Official Patreon Page. Specifically at this link