New Horizon

by Nugget27

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Death, Romance, Princess Luna, Drama, Original Character, Queen Chrysalis, Profanity, Adventure, Violence, Human
Length: 27540

Bald Ostri explores Equus.

Finally, at last, Bald Ostrich has made it out of Equestria. Away from Celestia, away from Luna. Ostri will encounter dragons, griffins, kumihos, all sorts of trouble will soon follow. Meanwhile, Equestria is at war with the Storm King, and Princess Luna comes to regret ruining her consort forever.

Published 2023-08-13 10:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-11-15 00:36:11 UTC

Entering Griffonia

The sun shined brightly, high in the sky, we had been traveling for a little over a day. Birds happily sang their tunes without a care in the world. Today we were stopping up by the side of a stream we had come across. I stared down into the water as fish swam by… It has been so long since I've had any form of meat. I drew my knife and quickly stabbed down when a fish got close enough to me. I grinned, knowing just how good this’ll taste compared to the food with a shitload of preservatives in it. After a few moments, I realized that the other fish probably swam off after I killed their friend. The size of the fucker was something to be happy about:

This bitch was huge!

I quickly spun around, seeing that Blaze and Chrysalis already had a fire going. “You ponies and your need to eat,” Chrysalis shook her head. “Are you certain you don’t want any more fish? I’m certain you can catch two, maybe three more if you tried,” she hummed as she sipped on a cup of hot cocoa she got from… somewhere. She probably bought some while we were stocking up on provisions. Dunno how she heated it up so fast though.

I raised an eyebrow and side-eyed Chryssy. “You just like watching my ass shake in the air while I was fishing.”

“Well… That is the main reason; you have a nice looking backside,” my marefriend giggled. “You are the one pony I’ve seen that’s even remotely decent at fishing; all of them think sitting and being patient with a fishing rod is efficient.” I snorted. “I forget just who I am dealing with, though. You are far, far from a pony where it matters.”

“Of course I am. I ain’t a pussy who squirms at the sight of something getting killed.” I chuckled.

“Still mad about what Luna said?” Blaze asked. She was gnawing on a bone. “Let it go, Ostri.”

“Meh, I just love how Luna has the audacity to call me a monster, undeserving of love,” I humorlessly chuckled. “I don’t know what I saw in that mare. I really don’t.”

Blaze sneezed. “I just don’t know what went wrong in that mare’s head. You two were deeply in love with each other a thousand years ago…” She sneezed again. “I want to play fetch,” she floated her bone over to me. “Throw it, but don’t touch,” I chuckled and did exactly that after skewering the fish and holding it over the fireplace with a wing. We sat and played while my food cooked. Eventually Blaze settled down and wrapped her tails around Chryssy after wearing herself out.

It was fun to see how quickly those two became best buds.

After I ate, Chrysalis decided to take a swim in the stream, as it was actually pretty big for a stream; it was more of a creek than stream. So I joined in, splashing water her way, making her hair droop over her face. Chrysalis squealed for a moment, before her head rose above the water again, spitting some of the water out. “Ostri, this is not something you wish to do; all out war against me is a fight that will not end well.”

“We’ll end up cuddling while we dry off,” I pointed out. Chrysalis tapped her chin.

“That is a good argument. En garde!” Chrysalis and I started assaulting each other with water while Blaze simply chuckled and judged us as we acted like children. Of course we got hit by a tidal wave when we got Blaze wet. It was fucking fun dude.

A couple of days later, we found our first town, it was occupied by yetis. The same motherfuckers that attacked Canterlot about a week and a half ago. “Halt pony, we are going to have to check your wagon.”

“You won’t attack me, my pet, or my marefriend when you’re done?”

“If you are not smuggling any Equestrian soldiers, we will allow you to continue on your way.” The yeti said. Well, if he doesn’t hold his word, he’s dead. Luckily for the yeti’s well-being, he checked, noted that there was only food, a kitsune, an ex-changeling queen, and my stupid ass on the wagon, he nodded. “You may proceed, pony. Enjoy your stay in Salt Lick.”

“Say,” I said before our wagon started moving forward. “How the fuck did you capture this town already?”

“The ponies already surrendered after seeing us. This is one of Equestria’s smaller towns, and further away from Canterlot; not many guards are sent out here. Why do you ask, pony?”

“I was just curious. I was once a general in my time, so I was curious about how you took over a town so quickly. Since you held your end of the bargain up, I have no reason to fight you. I just wanted to see the sights and whatnot. Any curfews I have to follow?”

“At ten at night, you are to remain in a building, or your wagon since you’re a traveler,” the yeti said. “Otherwise you are free to go and explore as you please; the Storm King is a fair ruler. Once he takes over Equestria and captures the Princesses, he will allow ponies to live their lives as they did before.” Huh. The Storm King doesn’t seem too bad. Not great, but not bad. “And as a sign of good faith, he’s allowing pony-owned businesses to continue running as if nothing is wrong. I personally quite enjoy this one restaurant called the Zurst.” Huh.

Me and Chrysalis have to eat lunch there before we leave! We asked the yeti for directions and started in that direction.

Luna set down her cup of tea and she took a deep breath. “Are you certain you do not need me, sister?” Celestia nodded.

“I’ve ruled Equestria on my own before. Ostri told you to look around your old bedroom, so go do it, perhaps we’ll find something of value. I can also manage all of this for a day; I will be fine, Lulu. Perhaps I will finally get Tempest Shadow to give up some details on the Storm King while you are away?” Luna nodded. “I would advise teleporting; it may be tiring, but I think the Storm King will shoot down any sky chariots we send out.”

“That was what I was planning on, sister,” Luna’s horn lit. With a pop, she was in the Castle of the Two Sisters, or rather, her old home. It did not take long for the Princess of the Night to find her old, private chambers. The very one she and Ostri had shared oh so long ago. Being in her bedroom brought memories to the Princess, wonderful ones, memories of a simpler time.

Like this one time, she and Blaze piled on Ostri in order to brush his messy mane out.

Luna sighed as she opened up her old nightstand. Many of her possessions have long since been moved to Canterlot, but there were a few things that remained. Such as an old jar of ink that was never opened, journals that were never written in… Even a small photo album of her and Ostri during the one year the two of them were dating. After looking through the album for a few minutes, Luna nodded to herself.

She went over to Ostri’s side of the room. To his old nightstand. Upon opening it, there were a few things of note. In the top drawer was Ostri’s award for when he defended Everfree Forest, an old diary, and a dagger or two. Even an old flint and steel. “I have not seen one of these in ages… Even back then I suppose Ostri was about finishing his work… with a bang.” Luna chuckled at her own joke.

After about three days and a half of traveling, we finally reached the border for Gryphus. It turned out that Salt Lick was one of Equestria’s border towns. I was let in pretty quickly, and the griffins present quickly enjoyed how ‘that pony has a spine’. Especially when one tried to search me and Chrysalis, then promptly attempted to attack Chrysalis, and then I knocked that son of a bitch the fuck out in a single strike. Hell, the captain of the border guards nodded to me, gave me a thumb’s up, and even offered to buy me a mug of mead in the small griffin town on the Equestrian border.

I took them up on that offer, obviously.

“So,” the captain said. The griffin was actually a girl by the way, a ‘hen’ according to other griffins. “Why are you in Griffonia, Bald Ostrich?” She asked. She took a swig of the bottle of mead she had bought for herself. “And I’m quite surprised to see you traveling with the legendary Queen Chrysalis!” She smirked. “Or that you’re dating her. You’re quite different from most just because of that.”

“Would you believe me if I said I was from the past?” My new friend raised an eyebrow. “I was once known as… the ‘fire lord’ amongst griffins. Ring a bell?” The lady's jaw dropped.

“Holy shit dude… You’re the stuff of legend amongst us griffins! That’s the one reason why griffins tried to unite their tribes together; we thought you were going to attack us too!” The captain punched me in the shoulder. It stung, but it didn’t hurt that much. “If what you’re saying is true, you have my respect and then some. We griffins love a pony with some backbone! You didn’t fight honorably, but you apparently wiped out most of the army sent into Everfree City! You changed up how we griffins fought.” The griffin extended a claw. “I am Eagle by the way.” I took her claw in my hoof.

“Nice meeting’ ya, Eagle. I’m surprised I’m not a fugitive for killing all those griffins.” I still get nightmares over that shit though.

“Dude, so many griffins would’ve killed to meet you, and simply trade war tactics with you. As a kingdom of warriors, we would’ve probably hold a good amount of respect for you!” We both grinned, and started talking about war. Well, I mostly told her of tactics from the human race, why I used fireworks, all that cool shit. She told me of her own little war stories from griffins, various generals, and failures of griffin generals. I even showed her an old fighting trick Luna had once shown me. Hell, I even pulled out a trick or two for fighting other quadrupeds that was pretty sound. Go for the hindlegs; it takes so much mobility if one of those breaks.

“Holy shit, you are a larger fountain of info than I’d ever imagined! I wouldn’t have thought to try and break anybody’s hindlegs from the get go,” Eagle nodded. “How’d you knock my soldier out so quickly anyways? I’m fully impressed; it’s why I haven’t arrested you, and why I don’t plan to; he did also instigate that situation by assaulting your marefriend.”

“Your chin,” I tapped my own. “Is the furthest point on your skull from your brain: Hitting that makes anyone’s brain rattle, hit them there and it’ll stun them for a bit and leave them with a bad headache. Hit them hard enough and it knocks them the fuck out. It works for quite a surprising amount of races. Ponies, griffins, yetis, you name it, if it has a brain and a chin, that trick will probably work on them. It’s about hitting somebody in the right places, not how hard you’re hitting them. I could punch you in the chest as hard as I can and do fuck all, or I can hit a joint until it caves in, and that would be more effective.”

Eagle sighed. “If only you were not taken; I would love to have you as a lover!” She giggled. “I’ll keep that mindset in mind next time I get into a bar fight!” Eagle is actually kinda cute… Chrysalis is cuter though.

Eagle raised. “Cheers to being friends, and cheers to being able to fight for another day!” I could give cheers to that. We clanked mugs together. “So why aren’t you with Princess Luna anymore? I’m sure you two were in love; I read that you only fought for Everfree City because you were Princess Luna’s consort?”

“Man, fuck that cunt. I pop back into existence and she fucking dumps me within twenty seconds of seeing me again! Then she has the audacity to tell me that I don’t deserve to be loved after I defended Canterlot against the Storm King’s initial onslaught!” Eagle’s eyes widened.

“The fuck…?” Her jaw hung for just a moment. “If I had a mate that would fight an army for me, twice apparently, I wouldn’t trade that mate for the world; a mate like that is a keeper! And Princess Luna just dumped you? To claim you don’t deserve to be loved or cherished? I could not imagine doing that to my mate even if they couldn’t fight an army for me. You love your mate, you hold them tight and close, and you fight for them. Not toss them out the moment they’ve served their purpose.” Man, if only Luna shared that line of thought. “I already didn’t respect the Princesses, and you’ve helped add to that disrespect.” I smirked in response. I have a new ally.

Eagle kept going after she took a swig of her mead. “And Queen Chrysalis was somehow a better choice? That bug swindled a griffin king in the past; that king was made fun of for the rest of his life… Despite that, you’re saying she’s more trustworthy than a Princess from Equestria.”

“Yeah, Chryssy has been so damn nice to me. We cuddle all the time, she grooms me, and actually gives two shits about me: It’s fucking nuts; I love her and she loves me. A foreign concept, I know…” I leaned back in my stool after taking a swig of my own mead. “Even if you’re not a guy, you’re proper bro material. You are super cool.”

Eagle grinned and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. “Same to you, Bald, a proper lad if I’ve ever met one!” She pumped her mead hand in the air, sending some of the precious liquid flying around.

“Oi, just call me Ostri; that’s what my friends call me. Hey, if you ever need a hand, send a message for me when I’m up in Gryphus, and I’ll come back into town as soon as I can.” Eagle nodded. Chrysalis slid in next to me with a huge bottle of mead. “Hey Chryssy,” my marefriend nuzzled me.

Chrysalis grinned. “I see you found a new friend?”

“Hell yeah I did. Why didn’t you tell me that griffins think I’m cool?”

“I didn’t know they would; you just did a good job at winning their respect. Griffins love it when a member of another race shows to not be a pushover, and they love war heroes no matter what race they’re a part of,” I looked at Eagle. “That is why I have not been put under arrest for what I’ve done. Griffins respect me for how easily I’ve swindled a king in the past, and for me kicking Celestia’s tail, in one on one combat, more recently.” Huh. I gotta ask about that later.

Eagle nodded. “She’s right about griffins, y’know; the King is gonna love you, Ostri, should you get in contact with him!” We all raised our mugs and got fucking smashed. The next morning, Blaze had to drag me and Chrysalis out of the bar after thanking our also very hungover griffin friend. While I was slurring, I fell the fuck asleep in the wagon. If it weren’t for the fact that I was drunk, I’d probably wake up after seeing a severed, scorched arm hit me in the face. I was in Canterlot during the invasion, Chrysalis was bloody and beaten behind me, and Blaze was just straight up dead. I was breathing heavily, staring directly at the arm while holding a hand to my chest. I blinked a couple of times when it all disappeared. What…?

“So you are capable of feeling remorse,” oh fucking boy. I know that voice very well. Suddenly the ruins of Canterlot opened up to a field, Everfree City. Luna, as she looked a thousand years ago, started walking up to me from the city. I had to admit… She looked just as beautiful as I remembered. Sadly, that didn’t matter, and neither did the slight stains around her eyes, nothing about her mattered. I don’t plan on trusting this cunt anymore. “So,” she sat down next to me. ‘How… is life going for you?”

“So now you care about hearing about my day?” I tilted my head. “Because you literally told me that I don’t deserve love… about three weeks ago? I dunno; it’s hard to know how long it’s been since I don’t have a calendar or a clock. Now cut the shit; why the fuck are you in my dream? Did the Storm King start beating you and your sister’s asses? Luna shook her head. “Get to the point then, or get out of my dream. I’m gonna wake up hungover; I don’t want my dreams to be filled with the same fucking monster that’s treated me like a bag of dogshit over the last two months.”

“I… Well, the Storm King’s forces have been bombarding Canterlot with artillery. But I am here to discuss what I have found in your nightstand, not discussing your return to Canterlot, please come with me.” Luna led the way into the city, which took a lot shorter of a time than it should’ve, in fact, as soon as we stepped into the city, it all melted away into our old bedroom. Luna’s horn lit up and my nightstand opened up. “I have already retrieved and moved all these items into Canterlot,” my diary had floated over before it set itself on the bed. A couple of my daggers soon followed. My knife was noticeably missing from the pile… then a jewellery box floated up between us. “I know you did not ask me to buy these…” The box opened up revealing two necklaces. And a note. “These are even more beautiful in the land of the living,” she whispered. “You’ve clearly bought them out of your own volition, so why-”

“Ah, our marriage necklaces. Good to see nobody’s looted those. I said was gonna marry you, remember?” I chuckled. “Of course you don’t; you didn’t love me.” I laughed. “Man, that was the dream of a dumbass; stupid, stupid younger me. Anyways, those were what we were going to wear to show that we were married, if we had gotten married. Good thing you kicked my heart in the dick and ruined what would’ve been!” I sighed. “If I didn’t get dragged into the future, we both probably would’ve been happy, not the happiest, but we would’ve been married, maybe have kids, and possibly stop the whole Nightmare Moon thing.” I chuckled. “Though I don’t believe I am worthy of your love, oh wise Princess. After all, I am a heartless monster that only knows how to hurt people.”

Luna stared at the necklaces. “You really did think I was the world to you…” She hadn’t taken her eyes off of the box. “And I threw you out so heartlessly,” she sighed. “I believe it is too late for us to amend our relationship, isn’t it?”

“Of course. Me and Chrysalis are happily dating,” I shrugged. “And I do not trust you or Celestia at all. I fucking loathe you, Luna. Not just that… I fucking despise you and everything you fucking stand for… What you said to me before we left really just sealed the deal; I doubt I meant anything to you, ever. You’ve broken me down so much… For no fucking reason. What you said… It hurt, it honestly hurt a lot.” My ears flattened. I took a deep breath. “To hear that, from the one I loved so much, and still kinda did despite everything you did to me… Fuck off, Luna, you fucking donut-“

I woke up to the worst headache ever. I even threw up a couple of times.

Author's Note

And thus, the first chapter. Unlike the previous two stories, this will be longer than ten chapters(hopefully). I am writing this mostly as I go, so we’ll just see how long it ends up.

A Date and Some Future Plans

I was finally let out of the hospital a week later, I was tired, I was kinda bored, and my leg still kinda hurt. Which leg? I dunno, one just feels slightly cramped. The sunlight made me flinch a little, but I quickly adjusted to the morning sun. I took a whiff of the air and let out a sigh of content. I hate being in the hospital. Chrysalis was now wearing a sundress she had apparently knitted while waiting for me to recover, and she looked kinda cute in it. Scratch that, very cute, very huggable, and sexy as fuck. So of course I hugged her as soon as we were out of the hospital. “How’d you even get the doctors to let you nurse me back to health? I asked.

“I merely threatened the doctors with castration; I did not trust them anywhere near you, when I have more medical experience and actually want you to recover. Those bastards wanted to keep you in order to rack up the bill from the organizers, hence the threats. Plus I did have the nurse outfit and I was hoping to pull it out at some point. And I know you liked it, you especially liked it when I was cuddled up next to you and sleeping.”

“Hey now, you are very cuddly…” The wagon rolled up next to us, with a very inpatient looking Kitsune-Kumiho in it. She did a few tippy taps while staring at us. “Let’s not keep our Kitsune waiting… Say Blaze, which side of you do you accept more? I don’t wanna actually make you upset.”

Blaze hummed. “I introduced myself as a Kitsune; I don’t like hurting anyone, believe it or not. If you refer to me as a Kumiho, I won’t mind, but I would prefer it if you called me a Kitsune.” Good to know. We hopped up into the wagon and sat down next to our fox. “So, are we going to explore Gryphus? This has to be the largest city we have come across so far, with a vastly different culture from what we saw in Everfree City, and even more different than what we saw in Canterlot or Ponyville. This would be a good opportunity to scout out for a location once we decide to settle down.” She took a whiff of the air. “I smell steak too. I may not need to eat, but I do want steak.”

I tapped my chin. “We may as well. What’s the point of a road trip if we aren’t going to explore the places we end up getting to?” Our wagon started heading up the street, taking a turn here, a turn there, and we finally stopped in what looked like a marketplace. We stopped at a few stalls, before we stopped at a very old-school-style bulletin board that had a bunch of jobs that the King was asking to have done. Of course, because there was a fuckload of souvenirs I wanted to buy, so I figured it’d be a good idea to take a few odd jobs before we start shopping.

I didn’t want to use our travel money on cool mementos.

The main difference with how old Equestria did these quests and how Gryphus seems to be doing it, is that you take the poster for the job down and store it somewhere. The job will not be reposted if the task was completed in a week, with solid proof that the task was done. Though if the task is not completed in a week, and somebody else takes the job, it is fair game if the job is completed before the new bounty hunter has completed it themselves. Basically, if I were to take a job and fail to do it within a timeframe, and somebody else takes the job, as long as I complete it before the new guy does, I’m the one who gets paid for the job.

So I took up a couple of easy jobs, getting them all done while Chrysalis and Blaze explored Gryphus without me. On occasion, a hiccup or two would occur, but it ended up with me accumulating a couple hundred bits. It only took about four odd jobs, which mainly involved delivering a package here and there. Maybe hold something for an old dude, allthst fun stuff. Despite me telling them to go explore, Blaze and Chryssy stayed relatively close by wherever I was doing an odd job. So when I got done with my last job, we decided to hit up a restaurant for more… Carnivorous residents.

I was surprised that Blaze was actually allowed in, or that a couple of griffins tried their claws at hitting on Chrysalis. Those that did ended up getting the stink eye from me. Except one, he decided to stick around because… “I bet you a little prey animal like you couldn’t be better in bed than a natural predator!” The griffin’s fist came down on the table we were sitting at. “I mean, I saw you at the tournament and you could barely even touch that dragon!”

“…That fucker had an extra meter of reach on me. If you want, I can make you suck your own, severed dick, keep flirting with my marefriend. I may have been your lunch a thousand years ago, but trust me…” I tapped my head. “I am no prey animal up here. Keep testing my patience; you will leave this restaurant with your own dick in your ass if you do.” The griffin simply laughed, while Chrysalis looked like she was being turned on by me being angry.

“Give me your best shot, pony. I’m certain-“ I uppercutted the motherfucker in the chin, sending his ass flailing to the ground. He groaned when he sat up, the birdcat’s head wobbled after his brain probably hit the back of his skull at the speed of sound. “Ugh… That hurt a lot,” he blinked a couple of times and shook his head. “What the heck are you even made of?” He slurred, probably because I punched him in the fucking chin.

“It’s called… Taking my shot at you. Now stop trying to flirt with my marefriend; she’s mine.” I growled. At that point our food got delivered to us, and I happily dug into my tiny little steak. You see, I think ponies can eat meat, and meat does feel good in my mouth. It’s just that I don’t think we can really stomach a whole lot of meat without either dying, getting sick, or getting sick and dying. It was like a holy man stuck his dick in my mouth and let me go to town on it.

Blaze and Chrysalis got a pretty big steak and were sharing it. Blaze probably could make use of the nutrients, but changelings apparently didn’t get anything out of eating, even if they could eat and enjoy the taste of whatever they are eating. “So,” I said, the griffin got back to his seat, but chose to ignore his food, since his head probably still hurt like a bitch. “Chryssy, wanna plan out our next date?” I asked.

“I would, but after you showed off how… predatorial you can be, I would enjoy doing more… Fun things tonight. Cuddles perhaps? Perhaps we can get even cuddlier and play.” We leaned in and nuzzled each other. “Now, my little griffin, next time you try to steal me from the love of my life, I will kill you. Ostri may be less inclined to do so, but I am more than willing to cause you bodily harm. My heart belongs to my stallion, not some pathetic rooster.”

The griffin’s head nearly hit the table. “But…”

“Sir, do you want to deep throat your own dick after I chop it off?” I asked. That woke him up pretty quickly.

“No! No! We… don’t need to go that far, pony. You’ve turned out to be more than I can chew.” With that, the griffin dropped some bits on the table and stumbled out of the restaurant. About an hour later, Blaze made me and Chrysalis go explore the city together while she watched the wagon. As for why? Well, that kitsune had a shit eating grin as she sent us on our way. So I was loaded with the money I got from the bunch of odd jobs I did earlier, and we were currently sitting on a bench, wondering what the fuck to do.

“So,” I leaned into Chrysalis. “What do you want to do?”

“I… Was going to ask you what you wanted to do; it’s usually the stallion that chooses what should occur during a date.” She hummed.

“Well, for humans, it’s usually the other way around; the girl, or the mare, chooses.” We both sighed.

“Cultural differences,” we said in unison. “You choose first,” we blinked a couple of times. “No, no, I can’t-” we both groaned.

“Horn, wings, hooves?” Chrysalis asked. “Loser picks,” ah that fun game. It was basically rock, paper, scissors. It basically played out the same way; horn trumps wings, wings trumps hooves, hooves trump horns. Usually you just say what you choose, since most ponies aren’t alicorns. After about six or seven rounds of us tying, we both groaned again, and we threw our backs into the bench we were basically stuck on. “I just want to know what you want to do; it would be nice to learn more about your personal interest!” Chrysalis shouted.

“And I just wanna hangout with you!” We both blinked again. “I suppose I’ll choose, but next time, you’re choosing something, missy, I want to learn more about what Chrysalis likes to do.” We both could agree to that. So we both hopped off the bench and started wandering around until we found a little carnival. It was pretty viking-esk, games such as ax throwing, archery, even a little wrestling arena for those who felt like doing so. “This looks fun,” I said as we paid for admission into… Well, the carnival.

“It does; I am quite excited to see you do the strength test. You did quite the number on that griffin earlier,” she hummed.

“Nah, I just sucker punched that fucker. I have never actually fought a griffin before. I stabbed that general while he was monologuing a thousand years ago, stabbed a griffin after he attempted to murder Cadance after faking a surrender, and then sucker punched the last two griffins I defeated. I don’t play fairly if failure leads to me dying a horrible death.”

“Good; honor is good to have, but self preservation is better. I hope you do not expect to fight in my stead at any point; we fight together should we have to. We are equals, and I am no slouch in combat, and I would rather us getting out of a fight alive rather than upholding any sense of honor. After all, I would much prefer you being alive, so that I can pester you every morning with kisses!” We both chuckled, before sharing one of those kisses. The two of us started going through each game, starting off with axe throwing. Every griffin who tried it seemed to be fairly decent, but none of them hit a bullseye. Me, being a genius at ax throwing, hit the wall… a solid foot away from the target.

I apparently had a good throw, but my aim was fucking amazing, as you can tell. Chrysalis then banned me from owning axes after I also nearly took my right, front leg off while throwing that ax. In fact, she dragged me away from ax throwing, before carrying me by the scruff of my neck. All while somehow scolding me and yelling at me for nearly getting myself killed on a magically dulled ax for children. How she managed to speak clearly with some of my fur and skin in her mouth is beyond me. “From now on, you are only allowed to use knives, any weapon I teach you how to use, and a bow and arrow.” She finally said, plopping me down at the archery game.

When I was given the bow and three arrows, I had one simple objective; destroy three vases. Each one had a little prize in it, all ranging from valuable to literally dirt. So when I hit the first vase… I got a ring, a gold ring with a ruby in it, it was more like a necklace that Celestia or Luna wore, so I’m going to assume that goes around Chrysalis’s neck. I shot three more vases and got a literal bag of dirt, and a thing of roasted sunflower seeds. I stared mostly at the bag of dirt while Chrysalis figured out how to put her new necklace on. “I won a bag of dirt…” I didn’t even care about the sunflower seeds, even if those would be a fun little treat later. What really mattered was a bag of dirt. “You know, there are things in life that I thought were either really funny, or really stupid. This is both,” I chuckled.

“This necklace is beautiful at least,” Chrysalis knelt down and hugged me. “I shall take a turn at archery; I want to get something for my handsome little stallion.” Chrysalis was handed the bow, as she held the weapon in her magic, she started aiming, had hit a hay bale, and actually hit two vases with one arrow. How she managed to become a goddess with that bow was beyond me, since she hit two more vases with her last arrow. “All I needed was a feel for this bow; it’s quite different from the ones I have used in the past,” she hummed. Chrysalis got a pair of matching rings, a silver crown, and a potato. Instead of the nice things, which she handed to me(she kept one of the rings for herself), she just stared at the potato while I put the ring and crown on. “I suppose we can grow potatoes on the wagon with your bag of dirt?”

“I don’t think ponies can even digest potatoes without having the runs later,” I hummed. “Do I look like a Prince?”

“You look fit to be my king, Ostri.” We shared another kiss, before stopping to get… smoothies I guess. That is one thing I had not expected to see at a carnival held by griffins, but they just had smoothies that were made from a combination of various fruits of your choice. Apple, banana, grape, sweet potatoes, oranges, all sorts of fun fruit. Chrysalis and I got one, large drink, took a seat at our table, and stuck two straws in it. It was mostly an excuse for the two of us to constantly nuzzle each other. At some point, Chryssy’s ears perked up and she had an idea. Within a flash, Chrysalis became Nightmare Moon, with griffin talons on one her legs instead of a hoof, and started scratching her ass with it. “Duh…”

“Chrysalis,” my ears flattened.

“I am duh night!” Chrysalis shook her ass in the air while scratching it.

“Chrysalis!” I yelled. My marefriend paused and immediately reverted back to her original form. “Please, do not become Princesss Luna, Celestia, or whatever fucking alteregos that they may have. I get that you mean well, and that you just want to make me laugh, but that isn’t my sense of humor. If anything, I get angry when I even see Celestia’s face, and I…” I let out a mix between a growl and sigh. “I’m sorry about yelling at you, Chrysalis, but please, please don’t assume Luna or Nightmare Moon. That just brings up a bunch of memories, memories that have long soured after what that cunt and her cunt of a sister put me through.”

Chrysalis’s ears flattened and she leaned across the table to nuzzle me. “I am sorry, Ostri, I merely figured you share my hatred for the Royal Sisters… I forgot that they left some fresh wounds on you,” she was actually crying now. “I-I-EEP!” I nipped her neck a bunch, bringing her right out of her shock.

“It’s fine, Chrysalis, now you know that our way of dealing with our hatred and pain are vastly different,” I walked around the table and hugged her. “Us dating each other, I want it to work, I know I love you, Chryssy. I also know that… We only started dating like two weeks ago? Three? There’s obviously some things we gotta iron out, and boundaries we gotta set,” we leaned into each other and sighed as we watched the sun begin to set. It was quite nice. “So,” I nuzzled Chrysalis. “How long do you wanna remain in Gryphus? I wanna head back down south into Equestria, so we can catch a boat, get to Eur Mono,” I pulled a map out from under my wing. “Then start heading west throughout Gilo Mono,” I drew my wing across to Hisui and Habando. “So we can visit Blaze’s homelands. Given her status, we might be safe in Habando, but it also turns out we may need to go through Habando anyways; it’s the closest point to Hisui for us to launch a boat from.”

Chrysalis hummed. “You have an odd knowledge of Equus, but I would not mind leaving Gryphus before the king notices that I am here and invites me to dinner. For one, I could walk into a trap, another, the king could also try to have me over for dinner. Though… I know you wish to help Blaze with her self confidence, but perhaps we can make a lot of stops? I, for one, would not mind seeing Prance, or even Layti.” Chrysalis tapped on an island that roughly looked like Greenland if it were to have all of its ice melt. Seriously, the only place covered in ice was Equus’s equivalent of Antarctica, and around where the Crystal Empire was, which was in the center of the North Pole. In fact, most of Equus looked a lot like Earth if most of the ice melted. “Let’s avoid this Tartarus Gate though, that’s where dragons live, and teenage dragons are horrible.” Good argument, we are steering clear of greenland.

Somehow, Doggerland was present, despite the apparently higher sea levels. Aso, on the bright side, Florida and Ohio were just fucking gone.

It was eerily similar to Earth in so many ways. “You know what?” I tapped my chin. “You raise a good argument, and I know Blaze knows where we wanna go, but we don’t have to rush through it. I did the math, using my world’s equivalent of the Wooly Path, and it would take about a hundred and forty days to travel to where I wanna go. We might as well stop and smell the flowers along the way; I only live life once, and I’ve always wanted to explore the world. Might as well do it in ponyland with my wonderful marefriend and beloved Kistune, right?” We then began plotting places to stop, and places to go after we pay Blaze’s homelands a visit.

Equu’s version of Australia was where the majority of Tartarus was, so of course I marked that as somewhere I wanted to go as a joke. “What? I’m going to hell anyways, might as well see what it’s like before I buy some property there.” Chrysalis snorted.

“I don’t know what hell is, but I can assume it is awful if you’re comparing it to Tartarus; I almost went there after I kidnapped Cadance’s little brat.” That was probably still better than accepting Starlight Glimmer’s offer of friendship, not gonna lie.

“Oh god, there’s more than four alicorns?” Chrysalis nodded. “Five bits says Cadance’s kid grows up into being just as much of a cunt as her ancestors?”

“I will not make that bet; it’s almost guaranteed for you to win.” We both shared a chuckle at that. We marked down at least fifty five different locations in just Eur Mono alone, or Europe if you’re a stupid, earth dwelling person. Gilo Mono, Asia’s Equus equivalent, had over a hundred spots to stop in. Africa, or Keshden, was our next stop after going through Gilo Mono. After a little while, a miniature tournament was set up in the carnival for anyone to join. Blaze had since joined up to watch me kick some ass.

Chrysalis mentioning how hot I looked while kicking the shit out of my first opponent in the first round, may, or may not have driven me to winning the whole fucking competition and fifty bits.

Author's Note

i have decided to heavily base Equus on Earth. Easy cheat sheet for the continents and existing country names:

Continent: North Amareca=North America
Equestria=USA
Griffonia=Canada
Mexico is still unnamed in my version of Equus.

Continent=South Amareca=South America

Australia= Literally Just Tartarus(borrowed idea from Diaries of a Madman)

Eur Mono= Europe

Gilo Mono: Asia

Keshden= African

North Pole is its own continent, mainly where the Crystal Empire is. It’s simple called ‘North Polaris’

Antartica has not been named in Equus. I did that on purpose, since I plan on having literally nothing live down there except racist penguins.
Also Atlanis Exists in the Pacific Ocean somewhere.

Will update cheat sheet in future A/Ns with countries, cities, etc.

Also, will establish a time since Dawn of a New Day with these A/Ns.

Also, cheat sheat for Timeframe for the stories in this series so far(timeframe for the period of time each story will stretch over)

Before the Night: A little under a year
After the Night: a month and a half.
New Horizons: Starts right after After the Night, so far, it’s been a month and half since the events of After Night. In total, Ostri has been in the present for three months.

I will speak to y’all in the next thing I post.

I found an orphan

We had long since left Gryphus and started heading back down south into Equestria. After asking around, it turns out Griffins do have boats, but the oceans on Equus were incredibly dangerous, sea serpents, pirates, krakens, all sorts of dangerous shit. Sirens were a thing, and apparently three were banished into another dimension a while ago for thinking ponies tasted good or some shit. Griffins, either to measure their dicks, or because they couldn’t, didn’t have airships.

Equestria, sadly, was the only country in North Amareca with airships for commercial use. Airships that can carry our wagon, because I don’t want to sell it, and it has terrible resale value from mine and Blaze’s fur. Before we left for Eur Mono, Chrysalis wanted to visit the badlands, where her old kingdom was located. So we were heading towards Canterlot again.

Mostly so I can also ask about this other dimension that those sirens were sent to.

“So, Ostri,” Chrysalis said, examining the trophy I had won during that little competition in the carnival’s fighting contest. “Would you be opposed to learning how to combat magic? Against anypony without a horn to use magic externally, I feel you would be more than a threat, but you’d be hard pressed to fight a properly trained unicorn and win. Not without a lot of ambushes and surprises up your sleeves.”

Blaze chuckled. “That’s why I am here. I may not be as strong as Princess Celestia is now, not in terms of spell casting at least, but I can fight most unicorns and win with magic,” her serene smile turned sour. “And if anyone thinks hurting my literal soulmate is a good idea, I will ensure their deaths are slow and painful.”

“Plus, if I am fighting a unicorn, I ain’t taking them head on,” I unfolded one of my wings. “I’ll fucking fly off and circle around. If I catch them by surprise, I can beat their ass into the ground. A unicorn ain’t gonna cast a spell if his head gets smashed into the ground constantly,” I chuckled. “Though when that’s not an option, and you and Blaze aren’t present, having a few pointers would be helpful.” Chrysalis nodded, before snatching my wing in her mouth.

And she started preening them. Oooh, that felt good. Within moments, I was a pile of pegasus puddy, and my tongue was hanging out the side of my tongue. Chryssy giggled. “I knew you’d love that; all you male pegasi love it when a pretty lady spoils you!” She then went to groom me, getting tangles out of my mane, cleaning my fur, pulling any loose fur or hair out, and helping along with my constant shedding.

With how winter was coming around, it was now fall, my coat was starting to shed a bit more, and clump up in some places- oh fuck, Chrysalis started grooming the fur on my belly. This… I see why dogs want you to rub their bellies so much; this is heavenly. Once Chrysalis was done, Blaze started pestering her for some grooming, and that’s how we spent most of our trip:

Pampering each other, stopping so I can cook something, sleeping, or stopping for an hour or two when we saw something cool. Occasionally Chrysalis would tell a tale from when she was ruling the Hive, I would tell a fictional story from Earth, or Blaze would tell us both to shut the fuck up and enjoy some birds’ cheerful little whistles. It was pretty fun. Before we knew it, we were already in Equestria again, heading further down south, by a railroad. The train had stopped, and a small wagon with a bunch of ponies wearing a bunch of shitty masks were waving daggers around demanding bits.

“You, pony!” One of the thugs pointed a knife at me. “Get in line or I’ll gut this bitch!” That thug grabbed a filly and held the knife up to her throat. Luckily, it was my turn to be on watch, so Chrysalis and Blaze were inside my wagon, so they weren’t visible. “And while you’re at it, grab anything valuable you’ve got, and get your stupid flank over here!” Chrysalis opened the flap of the wagon slightly.

“Ostri, what is going on?” She had a sleep mask on. It was kinda cute… I may have to kiss her later.

“Don’t worry about it, but be prepared to fuck somebody up,” I said before straighting my face out. I turned back, and hopped off my wagon. “I don’t really have much of value other than my hooves and wings, sir,” I said, with one flap of my wings, I landed next to the fucker. “So, I guess I’ll just sit here-” The asshat fucking kicked me, with both of his hindlegs! I grunted, and the filly was thrown at me.

“Put’em with the others!” The stallion shouted before going off to probably round up more train passengers. The filly was shivering and whimpering, and actually buried herself into my stomach for cover until we were promptly moved up into a circle of other hostages.

“W-why are t-they doing th-this?’ The filly whispered, burying herself back into my side.

“Some ponies… They're just terrible people,” I calmly said. I don’t know why, but… It wouldn’t feel right to leave this kid alone until I can somehow resolve this issue, and also find her parents. “Just…” I hummed. I could try some first responder tactics to keep the kid calm until I can find her parents. “What’s your name?” The filly didn’t have a cutie mark, was purple, and had a dark blue mane with a pink stripe going through it. If I didn’t know any better, I would assume this kid was related to Twilight Sparkle in some way; she was even a unicorn.

“M-my name… My name is Midni-night,” whispered. “Wh-what is your name, mister?”

“I’m Bald Ostrich, just some guy traversing the land. I’m a bit of a wanderer,” I started rubbing her back with one of my wings. “Where are your parents?”

“...When one of the bad ponies tried to grab me, my parents jumped to my protection. Both of them were hit with magic and didn’t get up afterwards,” she whispered. “Will they be okay?” Oh. What the actual… Okay.

“Point me the unicorn that hit them,” I coldly said. The filly pointed at a bright yellow unicorn, a knife was his cutie mark, the same one that was threatening to gut Midnight. “Okay, I am going to ask you a question… Do you know who Queen Chrysalis is?” The filly flinched. “Well, good news, she’s not evil anymore, and she’s my marefriend. Right now, she is hiding in my wagon alongside my pet magical fox, right now I am waiting for them to make a move,” I sighed. “I… have reasons to believe that your parents aren’t okay, kid, I’m not even going to sugarcoat it, I don’t think they will be getting up at all any time soon.” The filly whimpered and started crying, her snout buried into my chest. I ignored the feeling of snot in my coat. “I’ll protect you, I am going to keep you safe.” The same unicorn, walked up to what were likely his accomplices, two earth ponies and a pegasus. I hummed, before nudging the filly. “Okay, once that unicorn approaches us again, I want you to get behind me. Once he goes, this whole operation will be a piece of cake.”

It felt like hours, just sitting around, waiting for an opening. Throughout that time, more ponies were brought in, cowering in fear. Midnight was slowly getting herself back together, but I knew she was probably going to be depressed, and be broken for a while… Losing your parents sucks; I never even had parents and I could guess how poorly that would go. Once the unicorn, the same, yellow asshole, got close to us again, I nudged Midnight, and she got up and got behind me. The yellow unicorn sneered at me. I just sat there, staring dumbly. “Hey fellas!” The unicorn pointed at me after getting his buddies’ attention. “Have any of you idiots checked this asshat for weapons?” Wow, they only now thought of that. When the unicorn didn’t get the response he wanted, he growled before he started searching me for weapons.

When he got close to my left wing, where I usually kept a knife, I got a tiny bit uncomfortable, before he grinned; he found the knife. You see, I think he would usually be mad, but this knife was old as fuck and pretty ornamental. It had an obsidian blade, to match Luna’s night when we were still dating, had a golden hilt, with a gem of some sort in the pommel. Down the center of the blade was a silver line for stability in the weapon. If I remembered correctly, it was an old Lunar Guard weapon. Given that I was basically a general back in the day, it would make sense for me to wield a knife of some sort. The unicorn looked it over with a grin. “So you do have something valuable on you after all!” He pointed the knife at Midnight. “Now, tell me, does your wagon have anything else that’s valuable in it? If you don’t answer, I’m throwing this into that filly’s skull!”

“Yeah, there’s a huge bag of bits in the wagon, lemme take this kid with me.”

“That ain’t a goat, you blind, bucking idiot. Now show me that big bag of bits!” The three of us walked up to my wagon, before the yellow asshole convulsed a couple of times, before an audible snap could be heard. The fucker crumpled to the ground. Chryssy stepped out, looking pissed the fuck off. I grabbed my knife off of the unicorn before turning to the filly. “Midnight, I want you to get on the wagon and hide there until me and my marefriend are done, capeesh?”

“Capeesh,” Midnight whispered, before she started squealing. Blaze had grabbed the little unicorn, before proceeding to wrap her body around the foal. There was only a slight whimper of fear before Blaze started massaging the kid. Midnight immediately melted into the kitsune, a relaxed smile took shape; that’s the first time she’s smiled since I told her about her parents. Chrysalis had a small smile on her face, before turning to the group of ponies at the train. She transformed herself into a unicorn, an inconspicuous one, and we both headed into the group. I noticed the pegasus hovering around, waving a crossbow around, so I grabbed my knife and flew, as fast as I could, into the fucker, shoving my knife into his head all the while. By the time I had skidded to a stop, a disguised Chrysalis threw two, very not alive, earth ponies wearing masks on the ground. “Is everypony okay?” She asked.

“...There are a few injured,” one of the conductors shivered. “A few dead,” he shuttered. “But we are alright!”

“How… Did a few dudes on a wagon manage to capture a train?” I asked.

“The train broke down and we had to fix it,” of course. “Thank you for saving us!” The conductor bowed. “Everypony here owes you their lives! They were a moment away from sicking that unicorn on us!” I then noticed a hole next to the group, big enough to hold… a lot of dead bodies.

“Quit that bowing shit; just be happy y’all are alive, alright? Go find the ponies who were unfortunate enough to fall victim to this squad of assholes, and pay your respects for them,” I sighed. “C’mon Chryssy, let’s go check on the kid we now own, I guess.” Without another word, the two of us moved to our wagon to check on Midnight, and figure out what the fuck to do with her after all of this. When we got back onto the wagon, the filly was napping, using Blaze as a bed.

“All the stress from today got to her,” Blaze smiled warmly. “She is absolutely adorable, by the way, traumatized, but sweet. I’ve read her mind, so it was easy to get past her barriers. Right now she needs to be comforted, so let us rest here for the night, and wait to figure out what to ask her, and most importantly, what to do with her in the morning.” The kitsune sighed. “I hope we keep her; I love taking care of children no matter what species that child belongs to. It happens that midnight is rather sweet, and very cute, so I especially do like taking care of her,” the kitsune shook her head. “And the bastard that made her an orphan is dead, correct?” I nodded. “Good, monsters like that do not deserve to live.”

I woke up nice and early the next day, the train was still under repairs apparently, since it was just sitting on the railroad. Given there was apparently only one train in all of Equestria, that probably wasn’t a good thing, but whatever. What wasn’t whatever, was when I got a fire going to cook some breakfast, somebody from the train, probably a kitchen staff judging from the food cart they were pushing, came out. I was halfway through opening a can of chili, because ponies had that, but it wasn’t good chili… Okay, it was good, but there was no meat in it, which sucked. Oh well, the last thing I needed was to have the runs on the road. “Sup,” I offered my can, having a second one ready to feed Midnight should she feel hungry at all. “Hungry?”

“N-no sir, we were just going to offer you and your travellers some breakfast as a thank you for what you did yesterday,” the stallion sighed. “You came at a good time sir, those bandits were getting impatient.”

“I didn’t do what I did because I’m a good person, I’m absolutely horrible, I did it because they got in the way. Then I wanted to make them pay; they killed a girl’s parents right in front of her. I hate two things, myself, and murderous assholes like me. I don’t think I deserve anything… But leave the cart here, I’m sure some of the people I’m traveling with would like some pancakes.”

“...Okay,” the stallion went back to the train, probably to keep on working, leaving the cart.

It had been nearly an hour since the food card was left, so I took the pancakes and started reheating them on the fire when Chrysalis, Blaze, and Midnight stepped out. “Howdy,” I offered the plate of pancakes to the filly. “You gotta eat up; you aren’t gonna starve on my watch. Even if you don’t think you want to eat, your body needs to, and I’m sure nothing’ll cheer you up more than some pancakes and syrup!” I think I did a good job at convincing her, since Midnight immediately sat down, and dumped the cup of syrup over her food when I gave her the plate. Midnight’s tail wagged a little. You know, for a kid who watched her parents get killed in front of her, she’s doing pretty well.

I think. So, once she was done eating, Chrysalis the empty plate on the food card, and used her magic to send it back to the train. “So, what now?” I asked, turning to Midnight. “I… know you aren’t exactly happy about what happened,” I rubbed the back of my head. “Fuck,” I took a deep breath. “Do you have any relatives who are willing to take care of you?” Midnight shook her head, her ears flattened a little bit, and she looked a little sad. “No aunts?”

“No, my aunt and uncle treat me terribly, and my cousins just bully me whenever I visit them. Please don’t make me live with them,” she paused for a moment. “You aren’t going to dump me off at an orphanage are you?”

“...No. I grew up in one of those shitholes, kid. Trust me, nothing breaks you down more than sitting around, knowing nobody gives a shit about you, and getting kicked back into the dirt when somebody comes to adopt a kid, and you aren’t the kid they choose to adopt,” I shook my head. “I ain’t letting that shit happen to you,” I offered my wings. “I know I’m gonna be a shitty parent; I’m swearing like a sailor in front of you, after all. So I’ll make you an offer,” Midnight trotted up and nuzzled herself into my side, and I laid my wing over her. “You can stay with me and the crew,” I pointed to Blaze and Chrysalis. “Those are the crew, say hi.”

“If you call us the crew again, I am going to slap you,” Chrysalis interjected.

“...Never mind, forget that last bit about ‘the crew’. But you can still come with us,” I rubbed Midnight’s back. “And if you find somewhere you’d rather be than with me, you can tell me, and I’ll give you enough bits to keep you afloat until you find your footing. And if you choose to stick with me, hey, more power to you. I just don’t wanna send you back on that train, or send you out on your own, or just dump you here and hope you don’t die. For one, I’d feel like shit, secondly, that isn’t fair to you.” It also helped that Midnight, as Blaze said, was adorable. Plus, us orphans gotta stick together, eh?

“You’d let me stay with you?” I nodded. “Well… you would keep me safe, right?”

“If something gets to you, it’s because something already killed me, Chrysalis, and Blaze. I’ll treat you like you’re my own daughter, and I will fight to the death for you.” I chuckled. “Though, don’t take after me; I’m a horrible pony.”

“No you’re not! You saved me from those bad ponies!” Midnight got kicked a hoof out from under my wing, making me chuckle. “At least, you’re better than those mean ponies, so that has to mean something, right?” Midnight’s eyes held that childlike wonder, and it’s a wonder as to how… her parents got killed in front of her. How the actual… God, I gotta give this kid credit; I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if that were to happen to me.

“How… are you taking everything by the way? I know I couldn’t handle what you’re going through at all, not at your age at least,” I asked.

“Well… it hurts, but my Daddy always told me to keep moving forward, no matter what happens to him or Mommy. He said I would be doing them no favors if I were to give up and die if he or Mommy got killed. In fact, he said that no matter what the circumstances were, Daddy would willingly give up everything to make sure I live another day… and that is exactly what he did,” Midnight whimpered. “It hurts a lot, but I don’t want to fail my parents after they gave their lives up for me. And you’re giving me a chance, and you’re willing to take care of me! So that’s a good reason to keep going, right?”

“...Man, I wish I had your outlook on life,” I nuzzled Midnight. “Well, I hope you like seeing Canterlot or Ponyville; me and my marefriend were planning on heading there before we had to Eur Mono,” Midnight’s face lit up.

“I always wanted to go to Canterlot! Did you say Eur Mono? Can we go to Prance while we’re there?” Midnight got up and pranced around, going on about being able to dress up and be pretty like one of the Princesses. Ah… It is going to hurt like a bitch when I tell her that I hate all four Princesses, but I also don’t have to tell her that. “So what’s the hold up? Let’s get going, Ostri!” She headbutted me and my heart came back to life just to die again. This filly is definitely the cutest thing I have ever seen.

“Hey now, I still gotta eat my chili,” I said, holding my still half full can. This was meant to serve three people, and I ate about one and half people’s worth of chili in one go. My stomach kinda hurts now. I closed the can, and Chrysalis sealed it with her magic. “Aight, let’s get on the wagon, and you can tell me all about you, Midnight. What you like to do, all that fun jazz,” Midnight hopped up on my back, and I carried her off into the wagon. Chryssy and Blaze followed suit, and we were moving again.

I am going to be a terrible, adoptive father.

Some New Developments

I woke up at some point, a point way too early in the morning might I add, to a certain, little filly headbutting me. I blinked a couple of times as I lazily lifted my head, blinking a couple of times, before I nudged the filly. “Hey, eight in the morning is way too early for this, go back to sleep,” I grumbled, before laying my head back down. “Or better yet, go bug Chryssy or Blaze; I’m sure they’ll be happy to humor you,” I continued. A yawn escaped my jaws as I tried to rub the sleep out of my eyes.

“I tried with Chryssy, but she gave me the side eye and it was scary, and I can’t get Blaze to wake up,” Midnight said. “Plus, I wanted to spend more time with you anyways!” The filly tapped me with a hoof, in a similar manner to how a cat would try and paw at you to get your attention. “Please wake up and play with me…” Midnight gave me puppy eyes, very cute puppy eyes. I sighed. “Please?”

“Alright, what do foals play anyways?”

“...Don’t you know?” Midnight asked.

“Nope, no clue. I never had a childhood,” I said, sitting up on my ass. “Er, foalhood. Whatever ponies call their younger years,” I waved a hoof in the air.

“...What do you mean by that? You’re a pony, right?”

“No, I’m a monster in the body of a pony. I have killed hundreds before in cold blood; I am a terrible pony if I were one.”

Midnight’s eyes were as large as dinner plates now. “But…”

“Even monsters have hearts, kid. I ain’t gonna turn a blind eye to a cute, little filly that needs some help.” I nuzzled said filly.

So Midnight and I spent the morning playing together, she would try to headbutt or nip me, and I would try to catch her with my hooves. So far, Midnight had sixteen ‘points’ on me, while I had a whole three points. I know, I’m getting my ass kicked by a literal child, but her laughs are contagious and I couldn’t help but keep letting her win so that she kept on laughing. Chrysalis had long since woken up, and was watching us with a small smile on her face, and Blaze had folded her ears and flopped over to try and block out our noise pollution.

A couple of days later, a pass through of Salt Lick, which was now liberated of the monkey things, which was interesting. Stopped by some restaurant called the Zurst or something, and kept on heading south. After about a week or two, I honestly lost track of time, since keeping track would require owning a calendar, we stopped in Ponyville at long last. I took a breath of fresh air after stepping off the wagon while my companions disembarked from it behind me. Midnight sat there, in awe at the giant tree castle thing that Twilight Sparkle lived in. Chrysalis looked disinterested, while Blaze groaned.

“We best not spend more than a day in this stupid town,” the kitsune sighed.

“We won’t; we’re just paying Canterlot a visit, and this place happens to be on the way,” something nudged my shoulder, low and behold, it was Midnight giving me the biggest, cute little puppy eyes ever. “Yeah Midnight?”

“Can we visit please Princess Twilight Sparkle? Pretty please?” I looked to Chrysalis for help.

“Ostri, you did this to yourself for taking in a filly, creatures known for using ‘cuteness’ against you,” Chrysalis giggled. “I suppose we will have to stay in Ponyville for a little bit; you have a filly’s request to fulfill, after all.” With that, and me being a little bitch when it comes to saying no to Midnight, we rode the wagon throughout town, getting looks at how nothing was actually pulling the wagon aside from Blaze’s telekinesis, towards the giant, crystal, tree, castle thing. Because I’m going to assume that Twilight took a train, which meant she’d probably get back to Ponyville before my little group could travel through Equestria on a wagon.

When we stopped at the castle, I immediately hopped out of the wagon, since I had a few questions I wanted to ask anyways. Midnight and the rest of my group followed me up to the massive doors, when I started pounding on them. “Anybody home?” I shouted. Soon after, the door opened, and a purple little dragon opened the door. “Hey Spike,” I waved. “Is Twilight home by chance?” I asked.

“Yeah, let me go get her for you,” I don’t think Spike recognized me at all. I took a seat next to Blaze and just took the time to pet and let her use me as a pillow. It’s just been a minute since I just sat down and played with my kitsune.

“As soon as we are done talking with Twilight Sparkle, we are leaving Ponyville, I hope you know that,” Blaze leaned into my hooves.

“I know. Midnight just really wanted to meet Twilight Sparkle for some reason. You try telling me no to that face,” I pointed at the filly, who was now playing with Chrysalis while the four of us were waiting. “Spike’s going to be gone for a while; what is with rich people in power and big ass homes that they don’t need?” I hate castles. Before I could even blink, a purple flash of magic made me jolt, and Spike and Twilight Sparkle were standing in front of us. At first, you could see how happy Twilight was, only for her eyes to land upon me. I didn’t move, but Midnight was quick to try and greet her favorite alicorn.

“Howdy, Twilight,” I sat down at the map of friendship or whatever it was. It was just a table with six thrones. “How’s life going?”

Twilight and Midnight, having had their little meeting, Blaze immediately knew that the incoming discussion was not meant for little fillies. So she gave me a quick little lick on the cheek, before taking the filly outside. Twilight sat across from me while giving Chrysalis some weary looks. “So,” I started. “How’s things going with the whole war you and the other Princesses gotta deal with?” I asked. “Last I checked, I wrote a letter, while drunk, about a solution that Celestia could use.”

Twilight sighed. “Whatever it was, made the Storm King back off. Equestria’s been at peace for the last week,” she tilted her head. “Do you secretly care about Equestria and you’re trying to hide it?”

“No,” I quickly noted the checklist now suspended in the Princess’s magic. “You were planning for this?” I asked.

“Well… Given how Equestria is a hub for travellers, I figured you would make a few stops in Equestria each time you pass through. And… while I don’t think you’re a very savory individual, especially after the Friendship Festival, I can at least begin to see why you choose to do things the way you do. Given your position of being from another universe, your choice in pets, and… Marefriends, you are probably a fountain of information.” Me and my marefriend met eyes before shrugging.

“Alright so,” I pulled out my own notebook from under a wing. “I read up on sirens, and learnt of three specific sirens that Celestia and Luna dealt with. Those sirens were sent to a world, I quote ‘had weird, tall, bipedal creatures that were very ape-like.’ The description of the dominant race… is oddly similar to mine. The only thing I notice that’s different is the higher number of skin tones, from cyan, to completely purple…” I looked up from my notes. “I wanted to stop by and ask the local rulers if they knew anything about this other world. Because if I had access to it, depending on how technologically advanced these… humans are, I could use that.”

Twilight stared at me for a moment, considering what I had just said. “What do you plan on getting if you were able to go to the Mirror World?” Twilight asked.

“Probably not any weapons. A lighter would be nice, but probably useless with my hooves. I honestly don’t know, since my wings aren’t as dexterous as some other pegasi I’ve seen, but it would be nice to get simple comforts from home, such as a bag of chips, or actual fries. I also don’t really need to go to this other world, but I would like the option to be open. Just imagine how easy it would be to bring over some human technology and reverse engineer it for use amongst ponies.” I really didn’t care about pony usage, but I was trying to angle Twilight into letting me at least see this special mirror.

Twilight being able to progress her race forward with technology might be the key I need for this. I would like to have a shotgun before I enter Kumiho territory, since I don’t want to get up close and personal with a creature that can, and is willing, to disembowel me and eat my insides while I’m still alive because said creatures think human suffering is funny. Especially with a body not built for fighting predatory animals.

“Well… I don’t think I can show you the portal if…” Twilight sounded like she was about to bargain something for me to just see the portal. Before she could even begin speaking again, I got out of my chair. “Where are you going?” The Princess of Friendship asked.

I had already lost interests with the portal.

“I’m going to my wagon, gonna pass through Canterlot, and then hop on a boat and head for Eur Mono. From there, I’m going to head straight to wherever the fuck Kumiho and Kitsune live, stopping to and fro, enjoying the view, stopping anywhere that peeks mine or my companions’ interests, all that fun shit. Why do you ask?” I could practically see the gears turning in her head. “Let me guess, you wanna come along and drag your friends? Because you want to set a hoof in a dangerous environment to learn about animals that will probably try to kill you on sight.”

Twilight nodded. “Well… Nopony studied a kumiho, or a kitsune up close. I’d try to study yours, but she doesn’t seem keen on allowing me to do so, and you won’t order her to hold still.” Twilight pulled out a notepad. “And coming along with you, with my friends, would help me spread friendship, and I can study everything we find on the way!”

“Blaze is my pet, not my servant, Twilight. Not only is she my pet, but she is also a thousand years old, older than Celestia and Luna, and is scarily intelligent. I’m not going to make her hold still while you hound her with questions. However, if you want to come along with me, then you’re paying for your own expenses. If your friends come along, they’re getting their own wagon as well, and they better keep pace with me and Chryssy; we have zero reason to slow down for anyone. So you best hurry up and get prepared, because we aren’t slowing down today either.” With that, Chrysalis got up and I followed her out.

“Princess Twilight,” my marefriend stopped at the door. “I would like to… apologize to you, for everything that I have done to you and your friends. I won’t excuse myself by thinking I was in the right, or that what I did was good. I’m a horrible changeling, but I am making strides to better myself. Good day to you, and if you come along with myself and my coltfriend, I would welcome it. For some bizarre reason, he doesn’t hate you or your friends as much as he should.” Before I could protest, I was picked up by the scruff and, with dignity, let my girlfriend literally drag me onto the wagon.

By the time we were out of Ponyville, there was another wagon tailing behind us. The Elements of Harmony in it, with Apple Jack pulling it. The earth pony had asked us how our wagon was rolling without anything pulling it, but one look at Blaze’s eyes, which were glowing because of her magic, gave her that answer. Midnight, since she really liked the Elements, because they were national heroes, rode with the six mares instead of us. There was a flash of magic from inside the hooded wagon, for some reason, but I paid no mind to it. If the kid wants to learn magic from the literal Princess of Magic, I don’t mind. Judging from how they were at home and not helping the Princesses, I figured I could circumvent Canterlot’s airship business.

For one, it was expensive to just ride an airship, let alone ride one that carries wagons. So, we were either going by sea, or going for a cheaper airship company. We were heading up to Manehattan, which got Rarity very excited. Despite being told that Chrysalis isn’t going to hurt them, the six of them were understandably still not willing to immediately trust my marefriend. After all, she did invade Equestria twice, and captured them the second time around.

Meanwhile, in the Mane Six’s wagon

“So, Starlight, what have you learnt about Ostri, Chrysalis and Blaze?” Twilight asked. Starlight had dropped her disguise as a filly, having been put on that train for a reason.

“Well, despite what you told me, Ostri’s been nothing but sweet to me while I’m Midnight Starbright. He lets me play with him, lets me pin him down, and makes sure I’m well fed. Seriously, how he acts around foals is entirely different from how he acts around me as… Me. Or around the Princesses. Or even around you six. I know I said I was an orphan as Midnight, so maybe he has a bit of a soft spot? He said he never knew his parents. As for Chrysalis, while she doesn’t go out of her way to take care of me, and seems a bit untrusting of Midnight, she does give into her maternal instincts and grooms me when I get dirty. Blaze, Blaze is a sweetheart. If you don’t threaten either of her owners, or get her angry, she’s lovely.” Starlight hummed, before shivering a little.

“Blaze also knows who I am, she just hasn’t said anything yet; she’s waiting to see what we’re planning for Ostri and Chrysalis. I know you tasked me with tagging along with them, but I think we should all just stay home. Ostri’s not an idiot, and Chrysalis is scarily intelligent. Blaze probably knows what’s going on because of how advanced her telepathy is. I doubt any of them are going to be happy if they find out,” she rubbed the back of her head.

“About what?” Blaze had crawled out of Ostri’s wagon moments before sneaking onto their wagon. Twilight’s jaw dropped, an animal such as Blaze was moving a wagon continuously, something that would tire out most unicorns within a few hours, and seemed to have power to spare. “Twilight, you ponies are but flesh and bone, who have a strong ties to magic. I am literally magic in the shape of a nine tailed fox. I may have the mind of an animal, but trust me, I am not made of flesh and blood.” She laid down next to Fluttershy. “Now, what are you planning for my family? I know you, Twilight, have ulterior motives for traveling with us, despite your genuine interests in seeing the world.”

The alicorn blinked. “You aren’t ratting us out?”

“I will at some point, depending on if you’re putting my owner in danger or not, will determine when I tell him. If you don’t tell me, I’ll force the plan out of your damned skull, and tell Chrysalis and Ostri. And trust me, that changeling’s been feeding on the love that Ostri willingly gives her. She can wipe all six of you out in the blink of an eye, and if you threaten her mate, she will do just that.”

Twilight rubbed the back of her head. “Well, we were trying to see if we can get Ostri to change,” Blaze tilted her head. “I mean, he’s a bit of a monster. The only reason why he isn’t in a dungeon is because he technically hasn’t done any harm to Equestria, and because he’s a war hero. We want to redeem him and Chrysalis while we’re at it. Because I doubt the two of them are leaving each other’s side any time soon.”

“Specifically Chrysalis,” Starlight said. “She’s being put at ease by Ostri’s presence, and might be more willing to learn about friendship if Ostri mellows her out.”

Blaze chuckled. “Good luck, Ostri and Chrysalis do not believe in what Equestria stands for, which is friendship is magic, or whatever. Watching you seven try and change a pony and changeling that are more stubborn than bulls.” Blaze’s smile fell into a frown. “If you hurt either of them, Twilight, I do not care, I will go use my birthright to bring an army of Kumiho to Equestria. Ponies. Will. Go. Extinct. If. You. Hurt. Ostri. Or. Chrysalis. Do I make myself clear?” Twilight was shaking… The amount of power Blaze was now letting out of her body was… jarring. Even Rarity could feel just how strong the fox’s magic was. “Good!” Blaze was back to her ‘usual’, happy and cheerful self. She hopped out of the wagon, walked up to Ostri’s wagon and dragged him out of it.

The wagon kept on rolling while the Elements watched Blaze, Ostri, and Chrysalis all play tag while staying on the path towards Manehattan. Pinkie, being Pinkie, wasn’t shaken by the kitsune’s threat, and hopped out of the wagon to join them. Her laughter was soon mixed in with the trio’s. Ostri… was actually being nice to Pinkie, helping her up after she tripped over a branch along the way. Rainbow, being bored, joined them soon after.

“I think we should steer clear of Blaze,” Starlight shivered. “I think her magic is tied to her emotions… when she got angry, she felt like an alicorn, that wasn’t concealing their true power, was in the room.” Twilight nodded.

“Goodness, that beautiful fox sure does know how to make threats, doesn’t she?” Rarity shivered again.

In Canterlot, the Storm King sat in a prison cell. Across from him was Tempest Shadow. After being tricked by the Royal Pony Sisters, the Storm King found his residence in prison, and was only to be released if he surrendered to Equestria. The process of returning him and Tempest back to their kingdom was in progress… That only made the yeti king furious, while Tempest was still clearly shaken by… Whatever the ponies had done to her. Celestia and Luna were sitting at a tea table, reading over Ostri’s diary again.

“Truly sister, I think you’ve been reading that journal a little too much,” Celestia nudged her younger sister.

“That is exactly what Ostri would call it if we had found this before he disappeared,” Luna said with a humorless giggle. “Why did the two of us have to change? Why did I have to say what I did to Ostri when I first reunited with him?”

Celestia shook her head. “I am not sure… When he threatened to kill us both, I knew we had gone too far. But how do we recover a heart that’s been shattered? How do we regain his trust now? I couldn’t see past who he was beyond what he was, which was a brilliant little pony, with the ability to solve most problems that came his way with ease if he did them his own way. Had he not sent us that letter, Canterlot would still be being bombarded with artillery, and Equestria would still be at war. Perhaps, with Twilight and her friends traveling with Ostri, we can… perhaps get him to give us another chance.”

“Sister, that is a terrible idea… you already had the elements to go out with Ostri during his travels, didn’t you?” Celestia nodded. Luna shook her head and chuckled. “That stallion is going to develop trust issues, and he’s not even twenty four.”

Author's Note

i was really struggling with this chapter. Hence why it took so long. With this story, I want to take my sweet time with it to make sure it’s good. Hopefully it’s up to par.

Reaching Manehattan

After playing with Blaze, and Pinkie and Rainbow, I figured we should stop on the side of the road and have a bite to eat. Midnight hopped out of the Element’s wagon, and my Kitsune’s eyes locked onto her. Her eyes slowly followed the foal as she walked up to our little campfire. Sitting beside me was Rainbow and Pinkie, who had somehow gotten ahold of a napkin and a fork and spoon. Pinkie had managed to get a hold of a whole oven and was baking cupcakes. After playing a game of tag with these two, I was alright with sharing a pot full of canned chili. They were simply good people, and Rainbow saw past what I did at the Friendship Festival pretty quickly; she knew I had saved lives by doing what I had done, even if that wasn’t my intention. I hummed while looking down at the can… Now when did anyone manage to make this stuff in a can?

I sure as hell didn’t make it for anyone other than Luna, and that was a thousand years ago.

“Why are you staring at the can?” Rainbow asked, while I idly stirred the pot.

“I’m just surprised. According to Luna, back when we were dating, she'd never even heard of this stuff before I made it for us on a date. Now this stuff’s in a can, so just about anyone can make it.” I started reading over the ingredients. “Even has the same stuff I put in that same pot I made for Luna, but chili really isn’t a complicated dish.”

Twilight sat down next to us along with Midnight. Blaze’s eyes never left the alicorn or filly. It was kinda unnerving. “Somepony found a cookbook in the Castle of the Two Pony Sisters shortly after Luna made her return. It had odd sounding recipes such as mashing potatoes down, fries made out of potatoes, and then chili. Along with several other things,” Twilight said in a teacher voice. “Of all the recipes, chili stuck out the most, and somepony thought it would be good to sell in cans.” I hummed before chuckling.

“Of all the things that I left a mark on, comfort foods…” I shook my head. “Took an arrow to the arse, literally took on an army, and that gets erased from history… yet a cookbook I was making, so I wouldn’t forget the recipes later, that had a few preservation charms…” I leaned back a little. “It’s kinda bizarre, what your mark on the world would be. Some want to leave some grandiose mark, such as being the lead architect of Canterlot Castle. Or sometimes, you save a whole city, and you get forgotten about.” I shrugged, before lifting the pot off the fire. Chrysalis walked over and put a shield over the fire until it dissipated.

I poured a bowl for Rainbow and Pinkie, and then pulled some chicken out of an icebox on the wagon. After I quickly cut it up, I put it in a third bowl and gave it to Blaze. The ponies present looked at me with slightly wide eyes. I took my chili plain. “What?”

“Why do you have an icebox full of meat? Wouldn’t only Blaze want to eat that?”

“Sometimes I eat it too in small amounts. Meat’s good, and feels good in the mouth, especially chicken,” I sat down and leaned back into my Kitsune’s back. Her tails wagged a little more than they already were at the prospect of having a meal. “How’s the food, Blaze?”

“I wish we had a proper kitchen so you could spoil me rotten, but this is pretty close to what you’ve made me in the past,” she diverted her attention from her food just to lick my cheek, before returning to devour it. We both knew she really didn’t need the food, though she did like eating it, and rarely did she actually eat food. Even though she initially claimed she does need to eat, just not as often as something made of actual flesh and blood. “It tastes very processed compared to what you’ve made, though.”

“Yeah, but this shit expires in sixty years from now, that’s a long time for food to go bad. So all that processing at least went into something,” I had quickly finished my bowl. Apple Jack walked over to the rest of us, having made simple lettuce and tomato sandwiches for the rest of her group, to give Twilight one as well. “So, Blaze, why did it feel like the air around me was becoming more and more humid while you were on the Element’s wagon? It felt like I was underwater when that was happening.”

“Oh, some ponies were getting ideas that were pretty stupid,” she glared at Midnight. “And the Elements… may have an extra travel buddy,” Chrysalis laid down next to us, resting her head on the kitsune’s back.

“I felt Starlight Glimmer’s presence while we were traveling,” she added. “And weirdly, Midnight’s presence disappeared when that happened,” she eyed the filly. “I am holding my tongue, just in case Starlight is just teleporting to and from the Element’s wagon to keep Twilight posted about her stupid, little school, but I cannot explain why Midnight would disappear.”

“You didn’t feel how much magic Blaze was releasing? Magic like that could override other magical presences, especially the weaker ones from a filly,” Twilight said.

“That is bullshit,” Chrysalis tilted her head. “What was it? Yes, Blaze’s presence was strong, but I am old, Twilight Sparkle. I know how to pick out the weaker presences when a stronger one is nearby. I will drop this topic for now, but just know, if you are planning something ill-willed to myself or my mate…” Her smile never faltered. “Well, Equestria will be short of a super weapon.”

“Chryssy,” I interrupted. “You making threats,” I said casually while chewing on a cupcake Pinkie had given me, another reason to actually like the mare. “Kinda hot.” Chrysalis immediately started blushing while gliggling behind a hoof. “Though, leave Pinkie and Rainbow Dash, despite my earlier reservations, they’re cool.” I waved a hoof, before glaring at Twilight. “If I find out you’re pulling shit though, I’ll turn our little caravan around, I will drop your asses off in the Everfree Forest, and go. Or even better, I won’t even tell you I found out, and just leave you guys in Kumiho territory. I’m sure they'd love to see what pony livers taste like.” I slowly turned to Midnight. “Don’t be fucking with me.”

Blaze nudged me. “That’s Starlight Glimmer, by the way. Don’t say a word, I say we drop her off at an orphanage when we reach Manehatten, or dump her in a trashcan while she’s sleeping, and leave for Eur Mono,” Blaze said to me, and me alone. She also whispered her plan to Chrysalis because her ears perked up. “Trust me, this will be far healthier than just murdering Starlight.” The three of us nodded in our silent pack. “So, Midnight,” Blaze opened her telepathy back to everyone else. “Would you like to spend the night with Twilight Sparkle and her friends?”

“Yeah!” Oh, Starlight’s damned good at acting.

Over the course of the next few days, we would travel, sometimes Blaze would get one of us to play with her, mostly Pinkie since she was always willing. Blaze actually started to like that pink ball of energy because of that. Even though I was always down, Pinkie stepped up often before I could. Seriously, that mare is really nice, even if she is a bit much at times. She’s well intentioned, even if she lacks self control, but I can respect that she truly just wants the world to smile. And the world needs more people like her, that can get the world to smile; we’d all be less sad and depressed. So far, out of the elements, she was the best. Well, Fluttershy was a lot more reserved and distant, but I could respect her for just wanting some peace and quiet.

And her desires to stay distant from a monster like me.

Midnight, or as Blaze told me, Starlight Glimmer, spent a lot of time with me. Getting me to wrestle with her, or some other shit. On the way, we were halfway up to Manehattan, I think, before we came across an interesting village… full of Ponies. Ponies was the wrong word, I think. They were like goats with dragon scales. They had large, fluffy manes with a lion tail instead of the usual ponytail. There was one in Extra Large, that was probably the leader, and all of them were silent. Now, why were we here? Because Apple Jack and Fluttershy’s asses had red dots on them or something, so we had to stop by or some shit. I tried to take cover, thinking there was a sniper, but no. There's a friendship problem!

That has to be the gayest thing I’ve ever said in my life.

Well, no, I did say I wanted meat in my mouth, that’s pretty gay.

So, I was sitting in a village, watching a kirin, as they were apparently called, doing charades. They were sitting right in front of me, pointing at my fox, Chrysalis, and pointing at a well. “I don’t know how you expect us to do charades when you don’t have hands, but sure, I’ll bite.” I got up and walked over to the well. Low and behold… a baby kirin had fallen into the well, staring up at me, looking like it was about to cry but couldn’t. I stared down at it for a good three seconds. I hopped on down, caught my legs in the sides of the walls, and shimmied down. I grabbed the baby kirin, I think it’s called a cub, by the scruff of the neck, before shimmying back up. I dropped the baby on its butt and it ran up to the kirin that was doing charades.

Twilight sat down beside me while I was resting my hooves, letting Fluttershy and Apple Jack do the work. The farm pony had gone off with another Kirin at some point, one that could and was willing to talk. “Why are you smiling at me?”

“You actually helped somepony with a problem!” And without violence, I could hear that undertone.

“It was a kid stuck in a well, this time it was an actual kid since it’s basically a baby goat. There may be a lot of things that are fucked up about me, but I’m not going to turn a blind eye if a kid needs some help.” I pulled my notebook out from under my wing. “Why is that so shocking? I’ll happily help a kid out with whatever. I’m not that morally bankrupt.” I put away my notebook. Blaze came trotting up, and Twilight slowly backed away. “Hey girl!” Blaze yelped when I wrapped my arms around her neck, before happily flopping over and leaning into my embrace. I simply laid there, watching as Apple Jack had come back to yell at Fluttershy at least a few hours later about what was the best solution for the silent village around them. “You know, if it weren’t for Kirin being able to set themselves on fire,” I said as the Kirin from earlier ran in while on fire. “I would say they’re pussies who can’t handle a little argument.”

Twilight decided now was a good time to give her two cents. “How would you feel if somebody called you an idiot?”

“I wouldn’t be happy about it, but I also wouldn’t care. I’ve learnt a while ago to not care about what people think. And then that whole load of bullshit with Luna and Celestia made me really just not care. I’ve got two people I care about; Blaze and Chrysalis, if they continue to love me, that’s all that matters to me.” I readjusted my position while laying on my live bed. “Hey, Twilight,” I pointed over to the Kirin that was now carrying Apple Jack and Fluttershy. The rest of the Elements were preoccupied with something. Rarity was worrying about her mane or something stupid, Rainbow Dash was reading a Daring Do book, and Pinkie was… screaming down a well. “The Kirin are about to drown AJ and Fluttershy,” Twilight jumped to her hooves and looked where I was pointing.

“What?!” Her horn lit up to… a crowd of Kirin carrying Fluttershy and Apple Jack towards a window, both looked a bit(very) concerned. By the time anyone could do anything, the Kirin that dragged Apple Jack off, while on fire, ran in and saved the day! Wow, so fun!

“C’mon, Blaze, let’s get to Manehattan already; we have a world to see, not some stupid friendship lesson that I learnt while watching motherfucking Barney.” Blaze yipped. She got up and nipped me in an effort to get me to chase her, since she was running towards the wagon, I happily ran after her. Chrysalis stuck her head out of the wagon, laying in a little bundle of blankets was Midnight, who looked a bit cute, until I remembered it was some bitch pretending to be a filly. She was knocked the fuck out, snoozing and snoring away the day. “You know,” I sat down beside Chrysalis as we watched the Elements scramble to say goodbyes to the Kirin Village and get on their wagon to catch up to us. “We really should stop by an orphanage and see if there are any organic foals in there.”

Blaze and Chrysalis nodded. Chryssy was the first to speak. “You know, I do enjoy taking care of children, pony, changeling, anything. I know Blaze definitely enjoys taking care of foals, and I believe Midnight… could use a few friends. And your food supplies haven’t particularly dropped since traveling with our filly, so we could handle one more foal.” We all chuckled. Ah, Starlight, I would really love to murder you right now, but leaving you in an orphanage sounds really fun right now. “I hit Starlight with a sedation spell; she’ll be out until we’re already out at sea.”

“Smart, and devious… fucking christ, Chrysalis, there’s a child in the wagon!”

“Contain your hormones, Ostri, we have free entertainment behind us,” Blaze stuck her nose out the back of the wagon. Low and behold, the Elements were yelling at each other while packing their shit. They were falling behind because they took too long to say goodbye to one particular Kirin.

A couple of weeks later, we were in Manehattan. For some reason, Rarity was ecstatic about being in this place, while I was… at a loss for words. This place looked like it was straight from Planet Earth. Granted, this place was only the size of Manhattan, and had a third of the population to match what was Earth’s equivalent. I sat there for a moment, and got a nudge from Chrysalis, who was currently in a white, unicorn disguise. The disguise had a very similar build to Chrysalis, being rather thin, long, sleek legs, and a blue mane. She was supermodel levels of attractive for ponies, and any stallions, and a couple of stallions would try and steal a glance at her from the corner of my eye. “Are you alright? You hopped out of the wagon four minutes ago and just stared at Manehattan. Does something like this not exist in your old home?” She asked, concern washed over her entire body, she had slumped over slightly, and her ears were drooping.

She was beautiful, but I would’ve liked to see natural, undisguised Chryssy. That is the best Chryssy.

“No, it’s just…” I looked around. “This place is so eerily similar to New York City, a city back on earth. It’s like this place was ripped straight from home, but… that sign over there with the population on it? That’s nowhere near my world’s equivalent…” I sighed. “It’s just a bit surreal.” I took a couple of deep breaths. “Okay, I am normal, I am a normal horse with a pair of wings,” I nudged Chrysalis. “Say, before we drop Midnight off, can we see if there’s an actual orphan we can take care of? I’d like to raise a kid, not some mare pretending to be one.” Chrysalis nodded.

“I wouldn’t be opposed to taking care of another child, though when we get to the orphanage, I will have to drop my disguise; I don’t want to deceive any children we pick up-” some stallion came barreling out of an alleyway we were walking by. Blaze yelped and hopped out of the wagon, mostly because that stallion decided to take a knife out and hold it up to Chrysalis’s throat after taking her hostage.

“Give me your money, colt, or your marefriend gets it!” He shouted. The elements came out of their wagon, two of the six forgot that they had horns. Three of the six also forgot they had wings. They were just shocked to see me and Chrysalis getting robbed.

“Let go of my marefriend,” I unsheathed my own knife.

With the Elements.

Twilight and her friends sat and stared at Ostri as he and the stallion holding Chrysalis hostage circled each other. For some reason, Blaze hadn’t done anything, and Chrysalis didn’t just drop her disguise and kick the stallion. “We should probably help them, don’t you think?” Fluttershy whispered to the group.

“But that stallion’s got Queen Chrysalis, why should we care about her?” Rainbow hissed.

“Because she’s probably the only thing keeping Ostri from killing everypony!” Twilight hissed back.

“Buddy,” Ostri’s voice rang throughout the streets. There was a cadence that none of the Elements of Harmony had heard from the stallion. “Go rob somebody else, you’ll live another day in a dungeon, but you’ll live. That mare that you’re holding, is one of the few things in this world that I still care about.” He paused. His smile never faltered, as his voice got smoother and smoother. “Trust me, it’ll be best for everyone involved if you run in the other direction.” The mugger didn’t relent, and in a blink of an eye, with Rainbow Dash being the only one to comprehend what had happened, Ostri flew right into the stallion, angling himself perfectly to avoid hurting Chrysalis.

The mugger got punched in the face and was sent reeling back. He stumbled a bit, shaking his head in pain. Now the six could get a closer look at the stallion, an earth pony, a rather tall and muscly one. Standing across from him was probably one of the thinnest pegasi that Rainbow had ever seen, yet Ostri wasn’t backing down. He just stood there, having put his knife away. Chrysalis, still disguised, laid on the ground behind him, her tail wagging slowly as she watched her coltfriend slowly make his way to the mugger.

I punched the mugger in the throat, making him crumple to the floor while he choked and coughed, his forehooves were caressing his injured windpipe. “So buddy,” I whispered into his ear while he was still violently coughing. “I’ll leave you off with a warning! Next time, you’ll be leaving my presence as a mare! So next time, you better cooperate!” I whispered cheerfully before turning around and quickly rushing to Chrysalis. I got down on my knees and I skidded to a stop before her. “Are you alright?” I asked, wrapping my arms around her neck.

“Of course; if I knew you couldn’t have saved me, I would’ve kicked his head off or blasted him with a spell.” Blaze quickly darted to the stallion. She grabbed his tail and spun him around, until she let go. The mugger flew into a nearby trash can, landing perfectly in it. “Though, I also only didn’t fight back because I wanted to see you get angry again,” she got nice and close to my ear. “For such a performance, I may have to book a hotel for the night so I can reward you.” Oh. I felt my cheeks warming up. Chrysalis giggled and clapped her hooves. “Well, let’s go; we will introduce our filly to some more children.”

The two of us were joined by Blaze as we walked back up to the Elements and our wagon. The kitsune grabbed the sleeping ‘foal’ from the cart with her magic, and laid her on Chrysalis’s back. “You guys can book a hotel or whatever; we’re not in a huge rush so we’ll be Manehattan for a day. My family’s going to go… explore the city.” The six mares gave odd looks to each other, before nodding. We walked on down the street, with a map that Chrysalis had acquired, towards the nearest orphanage.

We could get a cardboard box and leave Starlight in it,” I suggested.

“But then she’ll just teleport home. If we leave her in an orphanage, she’ll have to act the part until she can run away,” Chrysalis glared at the filly on her back. “I am trying my damn best to help piece you back together. And mares like this, Celestia and Luna make my job rather difficult; she deserves to suffer at least a little bit. Just ignore what she’s done to me, what she’s doing to you is enough of a reason for me to kick her head off. But…”

“I’m trying to curb both of your desires to kill people. It’s great and dandy at times, but I doubt you two want to be in a dungeon for killing some random idiot…” She nudged the filly on Chrysalis’s back, who had just been hit with another sedation spell. “Or killing somepony; especially one ponies will notice have gone missing. At least this solution of dropping her off in a foster home is legal, so we can’t be held accountable.” That is a good point. Blaze chuckled. “Of course it is, I’m the smart one of our family.”

“So am I,” Chrysalis said with a grin.

“Hey! I’m not an idiot!”

“You are not, but us females are simply smarter; we know what’s best for you,” Chrysalis said with an even larger, shit eating grin.

“C’mon, let’s just drop this bitch off at an orphanage and go to another one and adopt a kid.” We turned into an orphanage that was literally around the corner to do just that.

We Visited a Bunch of Cuddle Bugs and I Ended Up Dying

“I just… I just… We can’t care for a filly. We barely make enough to get by ourselves,” Chrysalis was doing her best ‘poor lady that can’t care for a kid’ act. It was convincing as fuck. The secretary nodded, before taking Midnight. “She fell asleep on the way here; we’re a traveling couple and Manehattan was the nearest city we could drop her off at… Please find her a good home.” Chrysalis said with a hint of sadness. Blaze had opted to sit outside of the orphanage for the time being. The wagon had just rolled up, and she had hopped in it to remain out of sight.

“Of course we’ll find this little filly a home… You’d think she’d be awake by now.”

“...Actually,” I chimed in. “She’s been crying her eyes out; I found her shortly after some bandits caught her and her family… The parents weren’t super lucky. She’s been crying all night, and only managed to go to sleep this morning.” Hey, I wasn’t lying, I guess. That’s the story Starlight wanted to give herself. The secretary’s eyes widened.

“Oh you poor thing,” she whispered to the ‘filly’ in her arms. “We’ll take good care of her until she’s adopted, or can stand on her own,” the secretary rushed off, likely to get the foal checked in.

“Okay, run before we have to sign anything or pay any fees,” I said. Nobody needed to be told twice, she grabbed me by the scruff, and teleported us out onto the wagon. I stumbled a bit… Damn, that’s only the second time I’ve been teleported. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that. Blaze didn’t need to be told a word, the wagon just started rolling down the street at a much, much faster pace than the sedate pace we were going at while out on the road. “Well, there’s that kid gone,” I leaned back. “I feel a bit bad…”

“But also, it was Starlight Glimmer trying to manipulate us.” Blaze pointed out.

“True to that…” I need alcohol.

Chrysalis started snickering. Beside her was a set of paint… that was the exact same color as Midnight’s horn. “I may have painted a magic prohibitor and stuck it on Starlight while you two were sleeping. It’ll be a while before she can leave that orphanage. And I believe the most common deaging spell keeps you at that specific age until the spell wears off. So it should be a long, long week for Starlight.” She chuckled, before nudging me. “Remember how I asked if we could visit the Badlands before we left Equestria?” She asked.

“Oh… Fuck. We can go tell Twilight, or ditch them and take off at a different dock along the coast.”

“We should let them know, since I believe Twilight Sparkle will try to follow us anyways, and I believe Rarity would like to spend a day or two in Manehattan,” Chrysalis nuzzled me. “Thank you for agreeing to visit my old kingdom with me. And… sorry for putting a wrench in our plans.” She wrapped her hooves around me.

“You do know that Ostri forgot your desire to do so, right?” Blaze asked. “Because he was about to tell you about how it was his fault.” We both glared at the kitsune, who simply giggled behind her wall of tails.

So, while the three of us would like to find a new foal, we figured going to the Badlands would be a good idea. Plus, we might find a griffin kit, since they were adorable and Chrysalis said she’d let me keep one if I were able to find one. So, we went on to the hotel where the Elements were staying and told them the news. Twilight, being Twilight, immediately grabbed at the opportunity to study the new changelings, and was hoping to use Chrysalis for a comparison between new changelings and old ones. She quickly figured out how bad of an idea that was when one of my marefriend’s hooves turned into a hand and flipped Twilight the bird… Aw, she learnt that from me!

I am so proud.

So, because she didn’t wanna leave Twilight alone with us, Rainbow Dash tagged along, and Pinkie hopped in the wagon last second before it started to roll off. Apple Jack had brought apples with her, and wanted to try and sell some, Fluttershy was terrified of me and Chryssy, and Rarity just wanted to be in Manehattan because she’s a psycho who likes fancy clothes.

“Hey Ostri, where’s Midnight? I thought you’d wanna take her with us,” Twilight tilted her head.

“Left her with a foalsitter,” I lied. “Chryssy told me that the path to the badlands can be rather hot, dangerous, and no place for a filly her age…” I chuckled. “Okay, I can’t keep lying, uh, I know who she is, Twilight.” I started chuckling even more when Twilight and her two friends’ looked shocked. “Starlight knowing how to become a filly’s a new one; I wouldn’t have dreamt of seeing anybody do that a thousand years ago,” I took out my knife and examined it, like I had just killed somebody.

“But… That could’ve been an innocent filly! You kill-”

“I’m not that cruel, Twilight. If that was just a cute, sweet little orphan, I wouldn’t hurt her. No, I just stuck her in an orphanage and Chrysalis stuck a ring around her horn after painting it.” I nudged the Queen behind me, and the Kitsune that’s leaning on me. “I have two, very, very credible sources to believe that Midnight isn’t who she claims to be, one who can literally read minds, and I trust Chryssy more than I trust most ponies. Which says a lot given…”

“How I tried to get you isolated and alone so I could kill you when we first reunited?” She tilted her heads, and I dunno if she intentionally did it, but her ears kinda flopped when she did that, and I wanted to kiss her.

“And then became jelly upon being hugged?” We both chuckled. “That was surprisingly cute, by the way. The way you just slowly lowered yourself to the ground to get hugged better.” We both turned to Twilight. “You’re on thin ice, lady. That was a devious little plan, having your student spy on us, but there is something important that you should understand.” I nuzzled my marefriend. “I might not care about what happens to me anymore, but two very powerful people do, and they are more than willing to…” I hummed. “Chat with you about ruining me even more than Luna did. I’m a bit far gone, and I’m only not an unhinged, deranged killer because I would like to retain some of my humanity while I’m living in Equestria.” I kept examining my knife, before using a cloth to clean it. “But don’t be mistaken about humans, Twilight, since I know you’ve probably met a few in that Crystal Mirror…

“Let’s just say that we are at the top of the food chain, Twilight, for a reason.” I put the knife away and sat down right in front of Rainbow Dash, who had quickly changed her tune back to trusting me after I said I didn’t kill Starlight. “So, how’d you learn to fly so fast?”

“Oh, I was always like that-”

So the six of us ended up playing a board game that Pinkie had somehow stored in her mane. Halfway through, she was using me as a pillow, rolling a dice. Chrysalis definitely wasn’t excited about that, but she only allowed it because she probably sensed that Pinkie wasn’t trying anything. In fact, Chrysalis stopped glaring at the earth pony shortly after she became Pinkie’s cuddle buggy. The board game heavily resembled Monopoly, and played exactly like it, it was Monopony, and was literally Monopoly, but with pony puns.

“Say,” I said after bankrupting Twilight who had to have the worst luck I’ve ever seen(she landed on Horse Walk, the Horse version of Boardwalk six times, the last time there was a hotel on it). “Blaze, if Starlight can turn herself into a foal, can you turn yourself into a puppy?” Blaze nodded. “Can you do it?” I clapped my hooves together. “I bet you would be really cute,” I coaxed.

“You just want to hold me,” Blaze chuckled. “But because you look so excited to see me as a puppy…” She opened her eyes and she was enveloped in light. As soon as it dissipated, sitting before me, with wagging tails was a fox kit with nine tails. She reassembled a Vulpix from Pokemon, but had her same coat colors with a creamy white, black ears, and black tail tips. Her eyes were huge… almost at the same proportions as a pony’s. The rest of us sat and stared at her, having forgotten Monopony. “Well? What do you all thin- woah, Ostri, put me down!” She ended up being cradled, snuggled and nuzzled for the rest of the trip. Kitsune puppies are adorable.

Only when the Hive was apparently getting close, did she turn back. “Blaze, you did not tell me you would be dangerously cute,” I said as I nuzzled her. “Can you do that again, sometime?”

“You look like a pup with those big ol’ eyes… I’ll do it on your birthday, and for when you get married to Chrysalis; she’s planning it all in her head as we speak. From the dress, to your suit, to the mating rituals that will follow suit during your honeymoon.” Chrysalis threw a book at Blaze which only made the fox let out a very, very, unsettling human-like laugh.

“So, Chrysalis,” Twilight said, who had finally looked up from her book. “Why did you suddenly want to visit your old Hive? You have to know that they probably hate you now, right?”

“Whether they hate me or not is up to debate, whether or not that they hate me matters not. Every single drone in that Hive were my children. I may have not been a good mother, I may have been an awful Queen, but I would still like to make sure that they are doing well. Perhaps even give a few words of advice to Thorax; he’ll need all the help he can get when it comes to ruling.”

“How do we know you won’t try to use him to take over Equestria again?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Chrysalis nudged my shoulder. “For one, I love this stallion, and I would rather spend the next century with him than plot revenge that I should know won’t go anywhere. Secondly… I have been ruling a starving country, entirely made up of my offspring, and barely managing to scrape by every year for the last thousand years. I do not wish to rule anymore, and I don’t wish to have any more quarrels with Equestria.” Chrysalis shivered and I pulled her into a hug. “I bucking hate watching my children starve to death in droves every damned year because I couldn’t fucking be a good mother and find them food.” A tear rolled down her cheek.

Our guests remained silent, up until Pinkie walked over and pushed my marefriend’s frown into a smile. “Cheer up Chrys! You may think you’re a failure, but your actions inadvertently have put your Hive in a better place! That has to mean something, right?”

Chrysalis shook her head with a small smile forming. “You are as enthusiastic, Pinkie pie, I can see why Ostri actually puts up with you; you’ve got me smiling with such a silly sentiment… Thank you, Pinkie.”

Upon reaching the… Hive, okay, it was more like a mountain that got blown up and there was a throne in the center of it. There was a boatload of… I think those are changelings, but I could be wrong. For one thing, they were colored like ponies, another, they didn’t have holes in their legs. They had wing covers that weren’t too different from a lady bug’s, minus the pattern. They had tails that kinda looked like Chrysalis’s mane, but they were more sparkly. Sitting on the throne was a bug moose, from what I could see, and a whole bunch of changelings staring at us from it. Bits and pieces of the mountain that the Hive was built into, still stood and probably served to split the thing up into sections.

“...The Hive has certainly gotten more colorful since I’ve come here,” Chrysalis was under a disguise. Just a simple, brown, female unicorn with a black mane. “You know, I am surprised that Pharynx didn't call us a bunch of trespassers.” Her ears flattened. “Suddenly, I don’t know how I feel about visiting my children anymore,” she whispered to me.

“But… how will they know it’s you?”

“Most changelings, through pheromones, can pick up a disguised changeling. I’m sure you’ve noticed how ponies have their own distinctive smell, and changelings are the same. Except we changelings have a stronger sense of smell, so we end up… knowing exactly which changeling we’re speaking to. Now take into account that I was the Queen…” Oh, a few changelings were, in fact, snarling by the time we got to the entrance. Sitting before it was the tall, yellow bug moose from earlier. From here… I could tell he had a green underbelly and butterfly-like, transparent wings. Beside him was a shorter, dark purple bug moose with a red set of antlers.

Neither of them looked particularly happy.

Well, the yellow one got a bit happier when he saw Twilight and her friends hop out the wagon first. Blaze was sitting in the wagon with us, waving her tails idly. While they chatted, the three of us disembarked from the wagon. “Hey Thorax,” the shorter of the Bugmooses nudged who I assumed was Thorax. “I’m glad you’re happy to see your friends and all, but how do we know they aren’t being mind controlled by that thing?” He said, pointing at me and Chrysalis.

“Yeah… you’re actually right, Pharynx,” the tall, yellow beetle moose’s demeaner quickly shifted from happy and bubbly,to a poor attempt at being mean. “Chrysalis, we know that’s you, so drop the disguise.” He snarled. The attempt didn’t go unwarranted, since my marefriend immediately dropped the disguise and started giggling behind a hoof.

“Oh Thorax, that was a terrible attempt at being assertive…” She sat down. “I will give you credit, if it were not me you were speaking to, you’d probably scare the daylights out of them,” she began to scan the faces in the horde of changelings behind both bug meese. “I see you are all doing well, and look better fed than while I was ruling,” Chrysalis looked to Thorax. “I know you probably do not want me here, so I’ll make my visit brief. Just… Thank you for inadvertently forcing me to drop my position of power; it was becoming too much to bear and it started to influence my decisions towards the end.”

“You foalnapped us!” Rainbow shouted. “Though, after hearing what you said earlier, I guess it makes sense.”

“...What does Rainbow mean by that?” Thorax asked. “Actually, how do we know that this isn’t some ploy to take your crown back?” Chrysalis took the crown that was on her head, threw it to the ground, and zapped it with a spell so strong that I could feel the heat from a couple meters away.

“If I may say something,” I stepped up, walking past the burnt remains of Chrysalis’s crown.

“And why should we listen to you, pony? You’re probably-”

“I’m not defending Chrysalis for what she did. She’s done terrible things, just as I have. However, I am her mate, and I’ll say this; she genuinely just wants to make sure her children will be well off without her. If you would believe it or not, she loves all of you, and wishes you the best. Hell, if ruling and watching generations of her kids die didn’t drive her mad, she’d more than happily would’ve given each, and every single one of you drones the time of day one on one.” Chryssy nodded.

“And his eyes are not tinted green, so I am not influencing him; he simply is my mate.”

“WHAT?!” The entire Hive shouted.

“Well…”

“Congratulations!” The entire Hive said in unison. We blinked a couple of times. Pharynx and Thorax looked at each other, before the taller of the assumed rulers walked up to Chrysalis. Thorax… was actually a foot shorter than his mother.

“You’re… not being evil anymore?”

“Of course not. I never wanted to be evil. I will not ‘reform’ and assume that new form; it’s too colorful and hurts my eyes. However… I will refrain from doing horrible things when I can. Unless you threaten Ostri, then I will do some highly illegal, possibly evil things to you.”

“She dressed up in a nurse outfit because I got hit in the face by a dragon,” I chimed. “Kinda hot, not gonna lie.”

“...Sweet mother of changelings, she actually loves you…” Thorax whispered. “Does that make you our Dad?” What?

Chrysalis looked just as shocked as I was. “You… I expected to be chased off by now.”

“W-well…” Thorax rubbed the back of his head. “As much as you did horrible things, you were still our mother,” he said. “You were just doing what you could for us. The invasion that got many of us killed? That was to give the Hive a stable future when you had no other options. Then you went and tried your hooves again because you wanted to avenge those that got killed during the first invasion…” Thorax was now nose to nose with his mother. “And you were kind of scary.”

“I would have welcomed you to spend the day with me, so I would seem less scary.”

“…That’s the thing; you weren’t actively mean to us. Sure, our living conditions weren’t great, but we were barely scraping by. You may not be our Queen anymore, but you’re still our mother.” Pharynx snorted when his sibling hugged Chryssy, making her squeak. “You’ll change, right?”

“If… it means I can return in a few centuries now to see how the Hive is flourishing, then yes. If nothing else, it is so I can remain with Ostri without any fear of being put down.” Chrysalis nuzzled Thorax. “Pharynx? Can you come here?”

“So you can give me a hug? I’m not a cuddlebug, Mom.”

And there’s the puppy eyes. “Please?” She asked again. “I haven’t gotten the chance to hug you since you were but a nymph!” Pharynx shook his head with a small smirk. He, and several other drones came up to receive a hug from their old monarch. “You know, Ostri is your new father…” She said with a sly smile. What are you doing, Chryssy? “He could smile a bit more, and…

“We can make a changeling pile to help him smile-“

I started running for my life as a horde of changelings chased me down to give me a giant, group hug.

Author's Note

originally, i wanted Ember to come in and try and have her kick Chrysalis’s shit in. I’m gonna have Ember meet Ostri and Chryssy out at sea.

My Tour of the Hive

While Thorax gave Chrysalis a tour of the new Hive, I was sitting across from Pharynx. I was offered a cup of tea by the changeling, which was shocking, given how he was earlier. Blaze was laying her head on the table, while trying to steal some cookies that were on a plate in the middle. Several other drones were behind Pharynx, staring up at me. “So, how did you get Mom to actually fall in love with you?” The bug moose asked. “Mom went from cold and heartless, towards ponies at least, to happily cuddling and bedding one shortly after she lost her crown. What did you do to her, or what did she do to you?”

“Your mother’s been stressed out for the last thousand years, Pharynx. And while she clearly loves you guys, she’s barely been able to interact with anyone, or even be social. So she comes along, tries to get me killed, and then I hug her and cuddle with her.” I shrugged. “From there, we just traveled together, and she showed me loyalty where my ex could not; I appreciate that.”

“...Say what you want about Mom, but I suppose she’s loyal; most of us ‘lings will happily follow whoever is willing to feed us. Wait a second… you were actually feeding Chrysalis for her to be so loyal.”

“We also basically only had each other. I was alone, being manipulated at every turn by Equestria’s wonderful rulers, and Chrysalis was a criminal. We stuck together, through all the bullshit we had to endure, and she let it slip that she’d give dating me a chance. With… How loyal she’s been, I took that chance, we’ve been going at it for the last month or two. She loves me, I love her, we’ve got a few boundaries to iron out, but I’m loving everything about her. She actively nursed me back to health after I'd nearly been killed by a dragon.” Pharynx nodded.

“Well, know that Chrysalis is still our mother, Ostri,” he warned. “If you hurt her, we will all come after you.”

“She’ll probably break my neck if I hurt her,” I chuckled. “Seriously, that woman is sexy as fuck when she gets mad or takes charge of a situation.”

“So,” one of the other drones raised a hoof. “How is Mom in bed?” He asked.

“...That is your mother,” I said flatly. “Why do you want to know about her sex life?”

“...Uh…” That drone tilted his head. “I don’t know, that’s what ponies do when they hear somepony is mating with a cute mare,” he said. “I didn’t really think about it.”

“What’s your name?” I asked.

“Stinky, sir!” A portal opened up, a pink hoof grabbed the changeling, who wasn’t reformed by the way, before pulling the poor bug into said portal. The portal closed shortly afterwards.

“What… The actual-”

“Sorry about that Ostri,” Pinkie Pie sprung up out of nowhere. “I was just saying ‘hi’ to Pinkie Pie!” I’m just going to go on the wagon and drink alcohol until I pass out. That sounds like a good idea. Unfortunately for me, Thorax and Chryssy came by, Thorax was blushing bright red while Chryssy got on him for finding somebody named Ember attractive. By the time she had reached the table, Thorax was burying his face into Pharynx, who rolled his eyes.

“Mom, you just had to tease him about his crush, didn’t you?” The Bugmoose asked.

“It’s not my fault that my child brought up this interesting dragoness, talking about how pretty she is,” Thorax squeaked. “How tough she is.” Another squeak. “How assertive she is…”

“Mom! Stop!” Thorax shouted.

“Thorax, I am a thousand, one hundred and twenty three years old. My entire life was spent wooing stallions and figuring out what they do when they find a certain mare, or stallion, attractive. You, my son, are suffering from puppy love and it is adorable!” She clapped her hooves. “If you two have grandhatchlings, you must send me a letter so I can come see them!”

“Mom!” Pharynx was now laughing at his brother’s misfortune.

“...Okay,” I got out of my chair. “That-” Thorax’s horns lit up and I was suddenly brought over to him by his magic. “What?”

“C’mon! You’re my adoptive father, and the father to everyling in the Hive. I know we buried you in a changeling pile, but I figured…”

“You just wanna get away from Chryssy so she stops teasing you for finding a dragon’s ass to be nicely shaped, don’t you?” I smirked.

“Ugh! Not you too!” I hopped up on my hind legs and noogied the bug moose.

“Hey, you’re technically my child now; I’ve always wanted to tease my son for staring at a girl’s ass. Guess who fits the description of you being my child?” Thorax groaned. “C’mon, you know it’s all in good fun. Hell, if you need help, send me or Chryssy a letter, and we’ll turn our wagon right the buck around and help you… Just a tip of advice,” Thorax slowly looked at me. “Don’t get too cuddly with Luna or Celestia should your taste in ladies change.”

“...This is because of what Mom told me, isn’t it?” I raised an eyebrow. “She told me why I shouldn’t make my relationship with any of Equestria’s Princesses more than professional. Luna really threw you out because you weren’t needed anymore?” I nodded. “Because fighting wars is a thing of the past for ponies… I can tell that that’s messed up. Mom is treating you better, right?” He asked as we waved to a couple changelings that were passing by.

“Oh yeah. She makes damn sure that I’m happy, and I’m trying to hopefully work her back into somebody sane… That time alone, from all of you guys? That drove her mad. You, after getting your Hive together should’ve gone out and got her, by the way. She shouldn’t be given power, especially since she won’t see a reason to need it if she no longer has a Hive to look after, but she’s your damn mother. She broke her ass seven ways from Sunday just to make sure y’all had some love in your bellies.”

“...Yeah,” Thorax rubbed the back of his neck. “I didn’t know if finding her again would’ve been a good thing. Especially now that she knows that I have a crush on Ember.”

“So… how nice are dragon thighs?” Thorax summoned a newspaper and hit me in the face with it.

We stopped by what looked like an adolescent changeling, who was teal in color, and had matching eyes. On the floor around her looked like a bunch of textbooks. The room we had walked in was full of younger changelings, all doing their own little thing. “This is Ocellus, she attends Twilight’s School of Friendship and is home for the summer. Ocellus,” the little changeling looked up. She is adorable. “Say hi to Ostri?”

“You mean the weird pony that thought dating our Mom was a good idea?”

“…Why would dating Chrysalis be a bad idea?”

“You’ve heard what she did, didn’t you?” The young changeling asked.

“Kiddo,” I sat down in front of her. “Do you understand just how much your mother had to go through just so you can ‘reform’ and learn about friendship? Because while all that happened because she was overthrown, that doesn’t negate everything else she did for you and your Hive for a thousand years.”

“Like kill ponies?” She asked.

“Kid, she did that to get love for every single drone in this Hive. For a thousand years, after she took that crown, she did her best to feed all of you. That woman watched hundreds of thousands of drones starve to death because she couldn’t get enough food for y’all. What’s worse? Chrysalis had a last ditch effort, that last ditch effort ended with a lot of her kids dying. And she tries to avenge them, and what do y’all do? Kick her out of her own damned home because she’s ‘evil.’” The young changeling’s jaw dropped.

“On top of that, she tried, didn’t succeed, but tried to get to know every drone individually; she loves all of you. She probably remembers bits and quarks of changelings from the last century, she definitely misses those changelings, and yet she pushed on for y’all. She pushed on for me, and she’s in a much happier position now, Ocellus. Chrysalis did some fucked up shit, I’ll give you that, but at the end of the day, she was a struggling mother of thousands of changelings. Don’t you dare say she deserves what she got handed.” I took a few deep breaths.

“Sorry about getting mad; Chrysalis is my marefriend, I know what she’s gone through. I know how close she is to being insane, and I would’ve gone insane if I were under just as much pressure as she was.”

“I-I… Chrysalis watched how many changelings starve to death?” Ocellus looked about ready to cry.

“Not just changelings, all of you guys, surrogate or biologically, are her children. She, from the very moment Celestia casted her out, until the moment she got casted out of here, she watched children starve to death, because she couldn’t get you guys a stable source of love.”

“That… isn’t what I was taught at school. We had a recent history class, and one of the subjects was on changelings… It didn’t paint her in a good light.” The young changeling sighed. “Can I come see you and Mom before you go back to exploring Equus?” She tilted her head. “I know Mom isn’t a good changeling, but… she was trying to be a mother and help us…” I patted the kid on her head. “I wanna give her a hug.”

“I’ll make sure we stay here long enough for Chrysalis to reconnect to all of you guys. She said otherwise when we first reunited, but she’s your mother; she can’t not at least love you guys in some capacity.” I chuckled, and picked the kid up. “Wanna join me and Thorax on the rest of my tour of the Hive? It’ll probably end up with us meeting back up with Chrysalis and Pharynx.” Ocellus nodded. So I placed her on my back, since she was clearly an adolescent, but she was tiny enough to comfortably curl up and lay on my back.

The tour ended up at some hot springs that had been dug into. I got shown dancing changelings, a bunch of other pastimes changelings have picked up now that they aren’t struggling for food, and a changeling that was happy that their soup had cooled down. That changeling was my favorite because he was so happy to have room temperature soup. I couldn’t help but give that one a brohoof and tell him ways to cool his soup down better.

A few hours later, we were sitting outside of our wagon, Occellus was hugging Chrysalis while the two of them were crying. Twilight and her friends soon came out of the Hive after chatting with Thorax a bit more. “Yo Thorax!” I used my hooves to help direct the sound. “Lemme know when you wanna hook up with Ember, lemme know! I’ll be your wingman!’

“Ostri! If you say I anything about my crush on Ember, I swear I will-”

Something crashed into the ground right beside him. The dust soon cleared up and… A female dragon, standing upright, and pretty small for a dragon; even the teenager I fought was larger. She had feline-like legs, was light blue, and admittedly, kinda adorable. If she weren’t a dragon that could set me on fire, I would probably ask her who’s a good girl. “What was that, Thorax?” She asked. Tilted her head. “Who are you…” Her eyes fell on Chrysalis and I. I happily waved while Chrysalis slowly put the adolescent changeling that she was hugging down on the ground, before jumping between Occellus and the new dragon. Her horn lit.

“Chrysalis,” the dragon snarled.

“Hey!” I shouted. “If you two murder each other, I am going to beat your asses!”

“Shut up, pony! What’s your name? Lighting Flash?” The dragoness asked.

I chose to ignore her. “...Hey, Thorax,” I, in a single flap of my wings and a leap, landed right next to the changeling. “This is Ember?” I asked.

“Ostri… If you tell Ember, I swear to Celestia-”

“Hey, you’re Ember, right? Dragon Lord Ember?” The blue dragon tilted her head.

“...Yeah, why?”

“Thorax thinks you’re pretty,” I said flatly. “He’s probably gonna kick my ass for this later, but uh… he wants to start dating you and doesn’t know how to profess his love for you.” I got hit in the back of the head with a newspaper. “So…” The dragon froze up, her expression was blank as she slowly turned to Throax. The Changeling King, the strongest Changeling, the Changeling that looked his Mom in the eyes and challenged her rule… was blushing and hiding behind his translucent tail.

“You have a crush on me?” Ember asked.

“...Yeah,” Thorax’s ears drooped. “If you-” Ember snagged Thorax by the neck and pulled him closer. They stood muzzle to muzzle.

“You… Where did my assertive lessons go? You could’ve told me at any time!” She yelled. “I was waiting to see if you were going to ask me out!” She pulled back and punched the changeling in the shoulder and huffed.

“Hey now, he thinks you’re very attractive. Most dudes,” both rulers looked at me. “Tend to see a pretty girl and assume that she’s out of their league. He was terrified that you would turn him down.” I shrugged.

“I hate you,” Thorax whispered to me. Then, Ember snatched the changeling and pulled him in for a kiss. As soon as the two of them pulled away, Thorax fell flat on the ground while Pharynx snickered behind his fallen brother.

A few days later, we were traveling back to Manehatten so we could hook up with the rest of the Elements. Rainbow Dash was taking a nap, while using my shoulder as a pillow. Pinkie was playing with Blaze, and was giving Blaze a run for her money in terms of energy. Chrysalis was reading a book while Twilight was glaring at me and Rainbow. “Okay Ostri, tell me why Rainbow and Pinkie Pie are having such an easy time with becoming your friends, but I, the Princess of Friendship, can’t befriend you?”

“Pinkie is genuinely really nice, even if she is a bit hyperactive, and I can tell she has moments of calm. I can’t fault that mare for wanting to try and make me smile,” I chuckled when Pinkie managed to successfully puppy eye her way into getting Blaze to turn herself into a puppy again. “She does a good job at that, it’s a nice little reprieve from the rest of the world.” I patted Rainbow, who admittedly, looked really cute while asleep. “Rainbow is a bit weird.

“On one hand, I didn’t like her at first, since she kept trying to get me to race her. After we started traveling though? Rainbow’s a bit cocky, rightfully so, she’s amazing at flying, and she has her moments. Though playing tag with her probably helped a lot with me liking her. She’s competitive, but she’s a good sport, and actually… pretty nice. Loyal as hell too; I can fully respect anybody as loyal as Rainbow.”

Twilight nodded. “Me and Starlight can be nice, and you liked Starlight while she was a filly-“

“Starlight was pretending to be a filly. I have a soft spot for kids, especially recently orphaned kids,” I leaned back and pointed at Twilight. “You told her, for whatever stupid reason, to do that. Fuck you for that, by the way.” Rainbow lifted her head and yawned at the end of our little conversation. She smacked her lips a couple of times, and Chrysalis… Actually offered the cyan pegasus a canteen. She took a swig, before sighing.

“Your shoulders are really comfortable,” she sat up with a stretch. “Of course, you can’t beat a cloud, but that was a good nap.” She tossed the canteen back to Chrysalis, who caught it, and put it off to the side. “What were you two talking about?”

“Twilight really wants to befriend me for whatever reason. She’s doing a bad job at that,” I sat up as well. “Try not to cuddle with me too much; Chryssy may get jealous.”

“Rainbow isn’t into stallions, Ostri. I have no worries about her, and if she was, I’m still not opposed to starting a herd should you want to, and Rainbow would be more than welcomed to join us should we start one,” Chrysalis purred. “I do like how fit she is, and I’m sure you would too, if you were not dating me.”

“H-hey now… I don’t want to date a changeling. Not one that’s already taken at least,” Rainbow chuckled nervously. She took a deep breath before turning back to me. “Why don’t you like Twilight?”

“For starters, she’s heavily influenced by Celestia; I don’t trust Celestia, and by extension, Twilight: So far, I’m being proven right if that little stunt with Starlight is anything to go by.” I patted Rainbow on the head with my hoof, which was a bit awkward since she’s actually taller than I am. “She also didn’t like what I did at the Friendship Festival, which I admit, was awful, but it saved a lot of ponies.”

“I’m sure you’ll like Twilight eventually,” Rainbow shrugged. “Not everypony is without a skeleton in their closet, and… Oh jeez, I sound like Egghead over here with this sappy stuff.” We both had a good chuckle at that.

“I might. Though on the friendship’o’meter in my brain, she’s well under zero. Mostly because of her trying to use her student to manipulate me.” I eyed Twilight. “Also, Blaze knows you’re trying to do some shit with Chryssy too, you hurt Chryssy, and you’ll be looking a little less prissy.” I paused. “And probably dead.”

“Hey! Don’t threaten… well, if Twilight does hurt Chrysalis, I would get why you’d want to hurt her back. But you shouldn’t seek vengeance!” Rainbow punched my shoulder lightly.

“Hey, if Chryssy and Blaze get killed, I have no reason to keep living. So I might as well throw my life away at an overpowered, purple horse that can erase me from existence.” I yelped when a puppy Blaze tackled me and started showering me with love and affection…

“You will become my friend, Ostri, mark my words!” Twilight declared… I think. I don’t know, I had a wiggly, extremely cute, energetic little baby kitsune in my arms and I didn’t give a shit about anything else.

Author's Note

Will Rainbow join the herd? I dunno.

Don’t Fist Fight Dragons

After traveling for a couple more days, we ended up in the middle of nowhere, because we were still heading up to Gryphus, the capital city of Griffonia. Blaze often ended up being the main attraction on the trip, as she would often make us play fetch, tickle me or Chryssy, and overall just make the trip feel less like a drag. Honestly, she did a good job. Between me and Chryssy making out, to Blaze being Blaze, to even some of the scenery, this trip felt fun. Eventually we did stop because we stopped by what might be the equivalent of Niagara falls, or something like it, because we were at the bottom of a huge, absolutely enormous waterfall. I hopped out of the wagon as soon as it came to a stop to stare at it in wonder…

It was gorgeous.

The sounds of water crashing down into the massive lake filled the air, but not in an unpleasant way. Where the water was crashing was a long way away, and was quite nice. There was a nice, double rainbow, shining brightly and looking incredible. Blaze had hopped up in the wagon for cover; there was a slight mist, almost rain in the air as stray water droplets acted as a very, very like drizzle. Chrysalis had followed me out of the wagon, the buzz of her wings stopped as she landed beside me. “Oh my… days…” She whispered. “This place is…” She paused, seemingly at a loss for words. “I have only seen something like this in Neighara falls, and that pales in comparison to what I’m seeing right now.” She laid down to just stare up at the waterfall above us.

“This… I’ve only heard of this sort of thing back on Earth; I’ve never had the opportunity to even see this in person...” I laid down next to my marefriend, and she quickly pulled me closer to her side while we drank in the wondrous sight.

“I’m glad you two are enjoying yourselves; I hate getting my fur wet!” Blaze let out a high pitched whimper. “I admit, it is stunning, but I cannot enjoy it if it’s constantly drizzling due to the sheer scale of this waterfall.” She hummed. “I believe my homeland has something more brilliant than this; I’m sure you two will want to see it?”

“Your homeland… Why the heck are you even so far away from where Kitsunes are typically found?” Chrysalis asked, turning to my fox. “If I know Kumiho and Kitsune, they usually never venture far from where they are born.”

“I have several reasons for leaving Hisui behind, Chrysalis. One is hunting; griffins, ponies, everyone that liked how nice my pelt is, loved to try and hunt both myself, my kind, and our Hanbandonian counterparts. They weren’t successful, never were, you would be hard pressed to kill a Kitsune with any physical means, and Kumiho had outright tortured any hunters that stepped foot onto their land.” Blaze took a sniff of the air. “Though I am sure you two would rather enjoy the view than hear of this old hag’s backstory. That is for another time.” I hopped up, before leaping over to the wagon to hop right in, leaving me right next to Blaze.

“You aren’t getting off that easy, girl.” I nuzzled into my Kitsune’s side, hugging her head, and laying my wings over her. “What’s wrong?”

“Am I really that bad at hiding my desire to not speak of my homeland?” Blaze tilted her head, probably as a ploy to look cute so I’d forget about this conversation. “Curses, that didn’t work… Why are you so intent on hearing this anyways?

“We’re going to be stopping in Hisui at some point; you may as well tell me now. It is better to be prepared than to end up not being ready for your home because you didn’t tell me anything.”

“Well…” Blaze shuddered. “I am what you would consider a halfbreed.” What? “I am part Kumiho, part Kitsune. It’s why I haven’t truly stopped you from killing anything, but not overtly aggressive or cruel. In fact, you’ve helped curve that darker, more animalistic side of me, Ostri. You are nice to me, cuddling me, treating me as your friend and pet… That appears to appease my Kumiho side, that secretly just wishes to be loved. It also does not help that I am technically a ‘Princess’ for Kumiho and KItsunes; I didn’t want to choose to rule over one or the other, so I ran away to Equestria oh so long ago… I may be old, older than Celestia, but I am quite young for a Kitsune or Kumiho. I was only a century old when I first met you. Any number that I gave you at the time… Was a bit of a cover up; I am a halfbred freak, and I hate it.”

I reeled back. “Blaze, you are not a fucking freak. Do not, I repeat, don’t you fucking dare call yourself a freak. You can’t control who the fuck your parents were, Blaze. You can control who the fuck you become, and who you choose to be, not your parents. You are my friend, I love you, you are my pet, I love you. You are Blaze, and I love you. You aren’t ‘Blaze the Kitsuneho’ or whatever the fuck a crossbreed between a Kitsune or Kumiho are called, you are somebody I love.” I pulled Blaze into a tighter hug, and Chrysalis soon followed. “Don’t you dare think that I think you’re a freak. You’re my best friend, and that’s all there is to it. What’s in your blood, if you have any, doesn’t mean shit to me.” Blaze let out a very canine-like whimper.

“Ostri, this is why I choose to stay by your side,” Blaze wrapped her tails around me. “You… It appears I still have some self esteem issues despite how old I am.”

“Hey, no shame in that, bud.” I nuzzled my fox. “I love you, and that’s final. I will help you accept yourself if you want, but just know… I already accept you; if we ever drift apart, all you have to do is find me, and I’ll let you cry into my shoulder, alright?’ Blaze nodded and started licking my cheek. After that, we all climbed out of the wagon to get some water, have a swim, and explore around the waterfall until we got bored.

After a couple more days of travel, we made it to Gryphus. I could tell because of the giant fucking sign out front. It looked eerily similar to a less colorful version of Everfree City. It was much, much larger, but it just reminded me of home. I quickly noted the Roman style colosseum, along with a bunch of advertisements for a tournament for anyone to enter. The winner gets a huge pile of bits, a trophy among other things, and a ton of respect amongst the griffins.

Even an audience with the King.

Oh, the only rule was you weren’t allowed to kill anyone during the event. You can beat the shit out of them, but you cannot do anything lethal or permanently maim, anyone in the event. “You should enter the event,” Chrysalis said, sipping on some more hot cocoa(where the fuck does she get some much of this shit?). “We could use more money to fuel our road trip, and at worse, you just get knocked out as we go.” That was a good argument, and if nothing else, it was good exercise. So we kept heading towards the colosseum so I could get signed up. Once we got there, I gave my full name, what race I was a part of, and was signed up and given a roster for the tournament.

There was only one other pony in the whole event, some dumbass unicorn named Fruit Punch. There was a teenaged dragon, a fuckload of griffins, a minotaur, and a changeling or two. Though it was mostly griffins participating. It made sense; this was a city full of those birdcats.

The tournament was to start in a day, so we hopped in our wagon and waited for the tournament to begin. The next day, I was put up against a griffin. Though my match wasn’t meant to happen yet, that other pony from earlier was ahead of me. The pony in question was a brown, boring looking unicorn. From the looks of things, he was buff as fuck. Chrysalis whistled at the sight of his muscles. You see, I would’ve been angry about that, but listen, Fruit Punch was ripped, and actually pretty handsome. So I couldn't even blame Chryssy for taking a double take on that son of a bitch.

I’d probably be gay for somebody that ripped.

Anyways, one hop and a skip, and the griffin that was fighting Fruit Punch was screaming for mercy. It all happened in a flash, the griffin ran in, got one swing and a miss, and then got punched in the shoulder repeatedly until a loud ‘snap’ could be heard. Fruit Punch simply nodded to the griffin and let off of him. “Fucking christ…” The unicorn shouted. Huh? Nobody else uses that phrase but me! “That’s right, Bloodbeak, I ain’t no pussy!” The unicorn walked off stage.

Several matches later, and several griffins kicking ass, I was up next. You can tell how excited I am about how I quickly glossed over the rest of the matches, because this match was a curbstomp. I was actually going to murder whoever came up with this lineup. I, the only other pony in the event, gets to fight the one, fucking dragon in the whole event! What makes things better… The dragon was taller than Chrysalis, buff as fuck, and one of his claws was the size of my leg. Needless to say, this was a very fair matchup. I coulda gottenchangeling and beat their ass. I coulda gotten the unicorn and speed blitzed him. I literally could’ve been put up against anyone else, and I got to fight a teenage dragon.

I just stared at the dragon dumbly as the referee counted down. The dragon flipped me off mid-countdown, because I guess being fully capable of beating my ass into the ground wasn’t enough. Fuck you, Stormfly looking motherfucker. I sat down and brought my hooves up to my chest as I signed my own death warrant. “God almighty, I know I don’t believe in you, but eat a massive dick,” I whispered. The match started and the dragon and I charged each other. On the bright side of this whole ordeal, I got hit once and everything went black almost immediately. Nah, I got thrown into a wall and then knocked out! I only got to hear the crowd roar after I hit the ground.

When I came to it, it was several days after I got knocked the fuck out. Chrysalis was sitting next to me, I was laying in a hospital bed, and the nurse had a newspaper. “Good news,” Chrysalis said. “You didn’t come dead last…” Oh great. “In other news, the winner was a unicorn. He beat Tartarus into the dragon during the final match, and I believe… He is currently drinking his ass off in the palace with King Bloodbeak.” Wow… So cool.

If only my face didn’t hurt.

“My spine feels like somebody used it as a toothpick…” I groaned. “My face feels I got fucked in the mouth by satan’s flaming dick.” I coughed a couple of times. “I’m alive though! Ain’t that neat!” Chrysalis sighed.

“Luckily, the tournament organizers are paying for your hospital bill. On the downside… We will have to be anchored down in Gryphus until you recover,” Chrysalis’s form was enveloped in fire, before revealing her usual form… In a nurse outfit. “And luckily for you, I have some… Heavy experience in being a doctor, and I think you would enjoy it if I were to nurse you back to health!” The nurse outfit… was very clearly made to be as visually appealing as possible. Stockings that ended in high heels on the hindlegs, held up by suspenders, stockings for the front legs, a nice skirt that only revealed enough of Chrysalis’s ass to let you guess how glorious it is, and it hugged the Queen’s body so tightly that it left little to the imagination as to how curvy she was. Her nurse hat didn’t have the usual medical symbol on it, which was the Red Cross for some fucking reason, but rather a pink heart on it. “Well? What do you thinK?”

“I think I am going to have a good week being bedridden is what I think!” Chrysalis pranced in place, before summoning several bits of medical equipment and looking me over, and occasionally hitting me with ‘diagnostic spells’. She nodded, before going full doctor mode. “Okay, you are going to need to be hit with a healing spell once a day, which will make you pretty drowsy for most of the day, which is good. That means the spell is using spare resources in your body to heal you a little faster, but not enough to kill you or ruin your figure once you get out of the hospital. You will need to eat a sizable meal to make the healing spell safer for you, I will cook for you, and then you are to be supplied with cuddles and love until you fall asleep…” She got up close to me and whispered that last bit.

I was as red as a tomato.

Chrysalis trotted out of the room, so I was stuck, sitting alone for a few hours. “Hello, Ostri,” Blaze poked her head over the window. “Don’t ask how I am seeing into your room, that is on the second floor of a three story building. What matters is you’re recovering. Between myself and Chrysalis, you should be in tip-top shape! You may also get a visit from a certain alicorn; she was in the lobby recently.”

“Wat… Equestria’s at war though.”

“Apparently Twilight Sparkle was sent out on a quest to find some means to defeat the Storm King for good. One of her stops was in Gryphus, and as it turns out, the tournament was a front to gather fighters for Equestria’s militia.” Oh son of a cock sucking thunder cunt! “I know, you are so excited to meet your favorite alicorn, Twilight Sparkle. Remember what you said earlier? About her not being that bad? Well, she is just as bad as I said she was.” Blaze shook her head. “I don’t understand why Celestia doesn’t just go down to where the Storm King is, and drop a bit of the Sun on him, if her very existence is tuned into the sun.”

That would solve a lot of Celestia’s current problems. I could go tell her to do that. I won’t though.

Chrysalis trotted in the room with a bowl of tomato soup and a couple of breadsticks. A small smile formed on my face as she approached.

Twilight Sparkle buried her face into the table. Sitting before her was the champion of her little tournament, and he didn’t seem to care. “Look Sparkles, I know your country is kinda fucked, but like… I don’t give a shit! Bloodbeak here, he’s my bro, and he made a bet with me on entering a fighting tournament and winning one round.” Fruit Punch was not very cooperative. “That dude owes me so much booze,” Fruit chuckled. “So go fuck yoursefl!” Twilight is going to be stuck here for a while.

Pinkie Pie was with Twilight; she somehow found the unicorn to be familiar.

A couple of days later, I was able to at least get out of bed without Chrysalis leering at me. I… actually kinda enjoyed just settling down for a while after traveling. Currently, Chryssy, in her maid outfit, was ‘kissing my booboos away’ and it felt like heaven. Chrysalis was oddly warm, but her exoskeleton was soothingly cool to the touch. Blaze wasn’t ever allowed in the hospital because the griffins thought she was just an oversized fox with nine tails. “You know, I always did find a guilty pleasure in healing sick stallions. You may be my first true lover, but I have been, while in disguise, married before. It always felt a little… Nice to take care of my sick ‘husband’ while it lasted. This time, I get to care for my coltfriend without the fear of being found out or chased away!” Chrysalis wrapped her hooves around my neck and laid her head over mine.

“I’ll make sure to get injured and sick more often; if you enjoy taking care of me, I'll let you do so… You best get sick every once in a while though; I love caring for my fallen Queen. Chrysalis clapped her hooves together.

“I cannot wait for you to nurse me back to health one day!

Luna was sitting next to Celestia in her private chambers. They were sitting at a table with Bald Ostri’s diary. “There appears to be nothing in regards to strategies, or battle tactics if you are cornered,” Celestia hummed. “He did seem to quite enjoy it when you got sick and had to cook you some tomato soup though,” she hummed. “It… is quite surreal to read these events from Ostri’s perspective; he even wrote down the main summary of a play I told him I was writing.”

“It is… A bit disheartening,” Luna laid her head on her hooves. “Ostri truly did care about us, and we drove him away in such a horrible fashion. We drove him into hating us,” she sighed. “Sister, I doubt we’ll dive into the mind of Ostri while on the field,” Luna’s eyes widened, and she turned the pages to the exact date of the Battle of Everfree City.

So, I got shot at by a fuckload of griffins. I sucker punched the general of this tribe of griffins and it was great… Until he sicked the whole army on me. The only reason why I’m alive is because Blaze used some voodoo magic to raise a shield. I also only ran as hard as I did, because I still had a Princess to go massage after I’m done writing this. Well, now Luna’s gonna be pampering me; I kinda got shot in the leg and it kinda hurts a lot. I’ll live though!

Luna sighed. “Of course there’d be nothing about the tactics he employed…” Suddenly a scroll popped into existence with after flash of magic. It was from Bald Ostrich.

It wasn’t even formally written.

“Hey Celestia. You’re only getting this advice because I’m bedridden after getting my ass pounded by a dragon and Chrysalis is keeping me in a good mood. Surrender to the Storm King and then hold him hostage. Capture him, torture him, and make him give up. If he doesn’t give in… Kill him,” Celestia read. “That… Is quite a terrible way of achieving victory, but I suppose Ostri was never about keeping things harmonious.” She sighed. “I shall write a letter to the Storm King, then.” Celestia got up to go inact Ostri’s idea.

Twilight was leaning a hoof on her head, an empty cup of mead laid before her. Fruit Punch was going on about some, strange, bucked up version of the Mirror World.

Author's Note

There is now a third Fruit Punch in the Nugverse.