What Are You Doing?!

by RunicTreetops

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Celestia, Human, Anon, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 2770

Celestia has a bad habit of walking in on her family during the most inopportune moments.

Since retiring and starting a family with Anon, everyday life for Celestia has been mostly peaceful. At least, it has been when compared to what a typical day was like as a princess. However, that doesn't mean her new family isn't really good at keeping her on her hooves anyway.

Just what are they doing now?!

Published 2023-08-14 17:40:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-08-14 17:40:00 UTC

What Are You Doing?!

"What are you doing?!"

Celestia has just returned to her quaint Ponyville home after a routine visit to the doctor's office. It's a bit rare for her and her alone to be out of the house. Seeing as how her human husband, Anon, still has a day job running a local store and she is a retired mother of two, she doesn't get to be alone all that often. However, she prefers it that way. Thousands of years of ruling a nation may seem like a surefire way to be surrounded by ponies, but it doesn't make you feel less alone, especially without your sister by your side for much of it. Thankfully, that's all in the past, now. With her loving husband, her alicorn daughter Hopeful Skies, and her still very young earth pony son Passing Comet, not to mention her no-longer-evil sister being a quick teleport away, she can relish the fact that she gets to be surrounded by loved ones every single day.

But as she looks up at the roof, where her husband appears to be holding her eldest child over his head, she can't help but wonder what series of events could have possibly led to her life looking like this.

Both Anon and Hope look down at her like she just asked the weirdest question ever conceived.

"Throwing Hope off of the roof. I thought that was kind of obvious," Anon says with genuine confusion in his voice.

"WHY?!"

"We're practicing flying!" Hope's voice is light and excited, her oversized wings flapping gently as she speaks.

Hopeful Skies is a filly of around ten years old. She has a shoulder-length bright pink mane and a snow-white coat. Her magenta eyes look just like her mother's, as do the sparkles that occasional appear in her mane and tail. Said tail is a bit too long for her, and it drags along the ground when she walks. Her horn is typical for unicorns of her age, though her wings are much bigger than average. She still has yet to receive her cutie mark. She wears her favorite white dress with a gold trim that is enchanted to change size when she shapeshifts.

Which, by the way, she can do. Apparently having a magical human dad lets you shapeshift into a human, too. Go figure.

"Comet had better not be up there with you!"

"He's not! He's down there with you!"

Celestia's attention is suddenly turned towards her son, whose head peeks around the corner of her house. Realizing that his mother has arrived, he runs up to her with a smile on his face, quickly giving one of her long legs a hug. She wraps another leg around him protectively and gives him a smile.

Passing Comet is an earth pony colt, now four years old. He has a faded green coat and a messy, jet-black mane. He has short, pudgy features and a rounded face. Being that young, he obviously lacks a cutie mark. His bright green eyes shine with the same enthusiasm as his father's. Although he is still young, he's much smaller than other colts his age. In fact, he is surprisingly different from his sister, too. Not being an alicorn is one thing, but he also lacks the ability to shapeshift. As far as they can tell, he's just an ordinary (albeit a bit small) earth pony. Not that his family cares one bit, they love him all the same.

"Why did you leave him down here on his own?!"

Despite having a lot of experience taking care of children, what with her school and all, Celestia still has a habit of acting a bit overprotective towards her own progeny.

"I can keep an eye on him from up here. Would you have preferred I brought him onto the roof with me?"

"N-no! I mean- ugh!" Celestia rubs her temple with a free hoof. "You shouldn't be up there at all! Hope, you don't need to be jumping off of buildings to practice your flying! And Anon!" She looks at Anon with a stern look that only a mother can give, sending a shiver down his spine. "You should know better than to encourage this behavior! I step away for one day and THIS is what I come back to?!"

Anon winces. However, rather than answer, he glances up at Hope, who looks at him with guilt.

"Sorry, papa. I didn't mean to get us into trouble."

Anon gives Hope a smile.

"Don't worry about it, Hope. It just means that you'd better make this last one count."

"Last one? W-wait, really?!"

"Get ready!"

Celestia watches as Anon takes a few steps back, seemingly winding up to do something. Meanwhile, Hope smiles and unfurls her wings, causing Celestia's eyes to go wide.

"Don't you dare!"

"Alright Hope, on the count of three. One! Two! ...Three!"

Taking a couple of steps forward, Anon moves through a surprisingly practiced-looking motion as he chucks his daughter through the air like a football. Celestia gasps as Hope begins to descend, but just as she thinks she's going to have to make a move to catch her falling daughter, a single flap of Hope's oversized wings brings her higher into the air. Laughter fills the space as Hope gains more and more altitude, easily turning around in midair and doing small circles around the house. Anon watches with a proud smile on his face. She's been getting better. Celestia may not know it, but they've done this dozens of times. If she falls (which she has before), Anon is more than capable of catching her with his magic. Is it irresponsible parenting? Yeah, probably. But he sure as heck doesn't know the first thing about raising an alicorn, and she is flying now, so he has to be doing something right. Right?

A quick glance towards his wife on the ground is all he needs to know that he is gonna be in for it as soon as he gets off that roof. He lets out a nervous chuckle. Meanwhile, Celestia glares at him, unaware of the look of amazement and wonder on her son's face as he watches his sister soar through the air.

Celestia lounges on her couch, leisurely reading a novel she has been really into lately, "Phoenix Ranger Feathermare R." She ponders the silly outfits the characters are apparently wearing with a smile on her face when her ear suddenly twitches. Immediately, she closes the book, narrows her eyes, and just listens. She can very clearly hear Anon in the kitchen preparing dinner, but apart from that...

Nothing. The most suspicious sound of all. Comet is a very quiet colt, but Hope has enough energy to make noise for the both of them.

Bringing herself to her hooves, she slowly and carefully makes her way into the kitchen. Sure enough, Anon is standing near the counter preparing a few vegetables.

"Sunshine?"

"Hm? What's up, Tia?"

"Where are the kids?"

"Uhh, up in Hope's room, I think."

"What are they doing?"

Anon shrugs.

"I assumed they were playing. Why?"

"Do you hear that?"

"...No?"

"Exactly."

Moving silently but with a grace that only ex-princess Celestia could possibly pull off, she heads upstairs in the direction of Hope's room. She raises an eyebrow as she realizes that the door is closed. Pressing an ear to the door, she hears the stifled sound of Hope giggling. Celestia's horn gently glows with magic as she slowly and carefully opens the door just a smidge, peeking into the sizeable pink bedroom.

Immediately, she is greeted with an appalling sight. Comet's tiny form is stuck to a wall, his entire body except his head covered in duct tape. He has a curious look on his face, but doesn't necessarily appear uncomfortable. Celestia's eyes are half-lidded in disappointment as she opens the door, causing the nearby Hope to jump in place.

She's in her human form at the moment, her taller stature naturally lending itself well to the mischief that she is oh-so-good at getting into. In this form, her pink mane remains largely unchanged as a head of hair, though it does look a bit messier on her human head. She has soft features indicative of her age. Her skin is the same color as her father's, and she is already starting to show some of his height as well. Her favorite enchanted dress is still draped over her lithe form, the two slits in the back allowing for her wings, which look a lot smaller in this form, to comfortably rest along her back. Her long tail sticks out of a third hole in the dress, but even as a human, said tail reaches all the way to the ground. She could easily get it cut, but she likes it that way. Like her wings, the small horn sticking out of her forehead also looks a lot smaller when she is in her human form, but it works just as well as when she is a pony.

And right now, her small, dainty hands are behind her back in a failed attempt to hide the mostly used roll of duct tape from her mother.

"Hope?"

"Yes, mama?"

"What are you doing?"

"...Nothin'."

"Nothing?"

"Mmhmm."

"Care to explain why your brother is taped to your wall?"

There is a stern judgement in Celestia's voice. She was a master of the "mom" voice even before she became an actual mom, and yet she just seems to get better at it with time. Sure enough, her guilty looking daughter is like putty in her hooves.

"...Thought it'd be fun."

"And did he agree to this?"

"He didn't disagree to it."

Celestia turns to look at her son, who looks back at her with an emotionless expression.

"Do you want to be stuck up there, Comet?" Comet shakes his head as if to say "no." Celestia looks at Hope with a quiet fury. In response, Hope droops her head. "The absence of a 'no' is not the same thing as a 'yes,' Hope. And even if he DID say yes, you're his older sister! You should know better than this!"

"...I'll get him down."

"Good. By the way, your duct tape privileges have been revoked. And, if this happens to leave a mark on your wall, you'll be hearing from your father."

"N-no! Don't tell papa!"

Anon may be a doting father, but he is a stickler for spending money. He doesn't really need to be considering how wealthy Celestia is, but some habits die hard. Regardless, him finding out that Hope did something to the house that would need fixing is something Hope would rather avoid.

Wordlessly, Celestia turns to leave the room, closing the door behind her as she does so. However, as soon as she is out of the room, she stops in place. After waiting a few seconds, she turns around and opens the door again to see Hope using a pair of scissors much too big for her (that she isn't supposed to have) to try to cut Comet down from the wall, getting said scissors dangerously close to his soft, squishy body. Hope, hearing the door open, sheepishly turns towards her mother with the most guilty smile she's ever given. Her mother doesn't need to say anything. She already knows...

She's dead.

Celestia wipes the sweat from her brow as she takes a quick break. She has been plucking weeds from the large garden behind her house, and the summer sun is really getting to her. Ironic, she knows, considering that she is often associated with the sun, but she is also not used to doing her own gardening. A large hat protects her head while her mane, which has been tied back into a ponytail, droops along the side of her neck. She removes her sunglasses as the sweat is cleared from her brow, a sigh leaving her all the while.

Technically, this is Anon's garden. However, with him currently at work and her having nothing better to do, she figured she would give him a helping hoof while she has the chance. He's just as busy with the kids nowadays as she is, after all.

Speaking of, while Hope is currently at school, Comet is still too young to enroll. Celestia knows that he is in the backyard with her. After all, he's much too small to get over the fence by himself. However, it just occurred to her that she doesn't actually know how he is currently entertaining himself. She turns around and begins to scan the yard for her son.

She sees a few of his toys not too far from where she is sitting, but she sees no Comet. She instead shifts her gaze to the back of the yard; perhaps he is resting in the shade of their large oak tree? ...No, he's not there either.

Now standing up, Celestia narrows her eyes as she realizes that she has no idea where Comet is. He is a very quiet colt, so this is a fairly common occurrence, but it never fails to freak her out. Taking a few steps away from the flowerbed she was working with, she begins to call out to her son.

"Comet? Where did you go?"

"..."

"Comet?"

"Up here, mama."

Celestia suddenly looks up, her eyes immediately going wide. Sitting comfortably on one of the tree's limbs perhaps fifteen feet off of the ground is Comet, a nonplussed look on his face as he tilts his head at his mother.

"Wh-what are you doing?!"

"Sitting."

"How did you get up there?!"

"Climbed."

"Okay, but how?"

"Sissy taught me."

"...Right," Celestia mumbles under her breath, "of course she did."

Without another word, Celestia unfurls her wings and flies up to Comet, carefully cradling him against her chest as she carries him back to the ground. Gently placing him onto the grass, she lets out a deep breath while he looks up at her with bright, curious eyes.

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, Comet." Celestia shakes her head. "Just don't do that again, okay?"

"Okay, mama."

In a familiar motion, he gives his mother's leg a tight hug. With a tired chuckle, Celestia bends down to return the hug as best she can. Unlike his sister, Passing Comet typically tries to stay out of trouble, but his young mind and naivety don't do him any favors.

In short, he's just as hard to handle as the rest of the family. Go figure.

Celestia glances at a nearby clock as she rises from the couch. It's 9:00 PM, rain is pouring down outside, the day was extremely hectic, and she is exhausted. Luckily for her, it's a Friday night, and she doesn't have to get Hope ready for school in the morning.

"I'm going to bed," she says with a yawn.

Anon, who was sitting on the couch next to her, looks up at her as she stretches a little bit.

"Already?"

"Hmhm, like you aren't even more tired than I am."

"It has been a long day, I won't deny that. I'll join you soon."

They smile at each other before Celestia turns around and heads upstairs, ready to finally collapse in bed. On the way, she glances into Hope's room. Her children seem to have built a small tent out of Hope's bed sheets. Deciding not to say anything, Celestia just chuckles as she walks into the bathroom.

She has never been more ready for bed.

About fifteen minutes later, Celestia yawns once more as she exits the bathroom. However, before she can reach her bedroom, she is interrupted by Hope and Comet, who both pick a leg and give her a hug.

"Goodnight, mama!"

"What are you doing?" She asks with a chuckle.

To her surprise, rather than her children responding, she notices Anon approach her from behind, stepping around their kids as he reaches down and gives her a quick kiss. He gives her a warm smile before speaking.

"Just reminding you how much we love you, Tia."

Celestia is left speechless as her family hugs her. Her cheeks go pink while a smile forces its way to her face. Yes, this family of hers can be a lot to deal with. They surprise her, they drive her crazy, and they leave her so tired that she can barely function sometimes.

But she wouldn't trade them for the world.

Author's Note

I love this silly family.

As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!