The green outskirts of Ponyville were beautiful all year round. But if you were to ask Sweetie Belle, she'd say that they were particularly nice during the Autumn season. She wasn't sure what exactly made the whole world look so mysterious and inviting once the leaves turned orange and began to rain upon the dying grass, but she always felt a sense of peace deep inside her soul when she would stare at this scenery.
A pair of green eyes sparkled while gazing at the dim orange sky above. Frigtened thoughts slowly filling the filly's head. "What if I never get my cutie-mark". She thought to herself. "It seems that just about everyone has found a purpose in their lives". She pouted to the sky.
"Maybe I could get a cutie-mark for leaf staring... no. That sounds dumb, on the other hand I do wonder what would that look like" She placed a hoof near her forehead just below the horn, trying to imagine what such a mark could look like.
"Hmm. Maybe a looking glass and a brown leaf. Oh, oh maybe an eye staring at a fallen leaf or multiple fallen leaves... nah, that would be creepy" she shuddered for a moment.
Her thoughtful expression was slowly turning into a frown. Oftentimes she even believed that a cutiemark would never even grace her flank. Such an idea should probably bother her deeply. After all she was scared that others would judge and tease her because of her blank flank for the rest of her life. Yet... she found herself only really caring cause of fear and not sadness.
Actually. She was almost certain that her flank would remain blank for the rest of days. But weirdly enough she was slowly making peace with that fact. After all. did she even need a dumb symbol to determine her happiness or worth? Even if she was quite aware that Scootaloo and Apple Bloom would look at her as if she was in dire need of professional help cause of such statement. She could only care less and less. On the other hoof. Who could blame Scoots and Bloom. The whole CMC idea, their entire group was made for the sole purpose of finding them a cutiemark.
But by this point Sweetie Belle only wanted to spend time with the Pegasus and Earth Pony that were always there for her, even when everything looked bleak. They were always there, ready to lend a helping hoof. Yes. it usually just resulted in an even bigger disaster, but they would always try. That thought made Sweetie chuckle a bit.
"I mean. Is it really that hard to just admit that we like spending time together, it's almost as if we only do so under pretence of gaining a cutie-mark." The more she thought about it. The more it actually started annoying Sweetie.
This line of thought has been subconciously seeping through Sweetie's behavior.
So much so that she recently found herself only really suggesting they do something fun because she wanted to do it. No longer really having the heart to come up with elaborate schemes and dangerous tricks because of a cutiemark. No; instead she only came up with elaborate schemes and dangerous trick because she actually liked them.
Sweetie Belle took a deep breath. The wind was now gently caressing her two-toned purple mane which made her relax. She took a few steps forward, amused at the sound of dried leaves satisfyingly crunching underneath her hoofs. She made it into a little game. Trying her best to squish as many fallen leaves as possible. This was not only fun and amusing to her, it also made her worries drift away.
She must have been at this for at least an hour before exhaustion started overtaking her legs. Seeing as there was still an abundance of leaves and only more were coming she finally decided to quit for the day. She slowly trotted herself over to the pond and layed down on her stomach.
The clear blue water was very pleasing to the eye. She remembered how Cheerilee told them that water was actually colorless and that it was just a trick of light, but she didn't care. After all, it still looked beautiful and it seemed blue-ish enough to her. An idea suddenly crossed her mind. A green aura started eminating from her horn as she picked up a small pebble that nested close to a tree-stump.
She threw the pebble as hard as she could but the little thing just sank without jumping once. Sweetie Belle was determined however. She quickly pulled in two slightly bigger pebbles and threw one after the other with the same force she applied before. But the results were also the same. Both pebbles sank like hammers underneath the pond.
Sweetie Belle let out a frustrated groan and slowly started walking away from the pond. "How does Scootaloo even do this. She makes it look so easy" She mutteres to herself with a pout.
"Wait. I think Scootaloo once tried to explain how this works. I can't seem to remember how it went." It's not like Scootaloo ever had the patience to explain too much of anything but she occasionally did try. Sweetie Belle vaguely remembered how Scoots told her that the flatter the stone, the better it was for skipping on water.
"Hmm... Makes sense... I think." Sweetie Belle once more lit up her horn and started floating a few pebbles at once. "I mean they are all pretty flat" she thought to herself, "only a few are kinda sharp, I guess I'm just not good at this. Although maybe I can try and remember what else did Scootaloo tell me"
Sweetie Belle tried real hard to remember Scootaloo's words. She was certain that Scootaloo told her how the pebble should be thrown with its edge facing the water. So Sweetie now tried throwing them from the sides. She first started with a few overhead swings that only sunk.
"Ok. Maybe the edge doesn't have to face the water. What if I threw it like a frisbee." The next pebble she carefully picked up and studied. Her eyes making a few calculations on how to throw it, but she was mostly just fishing her mind for the rest of Scootaloo's lecture on the art of stone skipping.
When she was unable to recall anything else she decided on trying the frisbee thing. Once again hurling the rock with as much force as she could muster her eyes went wide open when she saw the rock jump once before it sank.
What was in reality a miniscule achievement was making Sweetie Belle's heart race in excitement
"I did it. I did it, yay that was awesome" In her overjoyed mind she could suddenly see an image of a memory. Scootaloo always threw the pebbles in a sidehoof swing as she also did when playing as a baseball pitcher.
"So... Maybe I should try throwing it from right to left like a baseball ball instead of left to right like a frisbee. Alright let's try that out." She gripped the corners of the pebble with her telekinetic hold and threw the rock as if she was trying to pitch a ball, also trying to maintain it so that the throw's height was just below her shoulders. To her absolute surprise the stone had skipped twice before it finally sunk. She stood there speechless, eyes wide open for a good minute before she finally spoke.
"CUTIEMARK CRUSADERS STONE SKIPPERS YAY!" Sweetie Belle screamed out at the top of her lungs to the audience of trees and empty pastures and valleys. Even though there was nopony here she still found herself blushing out of embarassement. After all. It wasn't that impressive.
Scootaloo was already a pro at this and Apple Bloom probably knew how to skip stones too. "It's just that I'm a slow learner" she lowered her head and looked at the grass. "Scootaloo can probably make a stone skip like 5 times before it sinks. Pffft. It's Scootaloo I'm talking about she's like the most athletic and sporty pony in the whole Ponyville." This sudden realization made Sweetie Belle's heart sink.
"She's better than me at everything. I can't even dance better than her. She beats me at almost every game and usually rubs it in my face. *GASP* What if she only hangs out with me so that she can gloat. No, no that can't be right. We are friends. She would walk through fire if it meant saving me or Apple Bloom. Something that she ready demonstrated multiple times." Sweetie Belle raised her hoof to scratch her cheeks only to find that she let out a few tears.
"But if I know that Scootaloo isn't trying to make me feel bad, why does it still hurt. Am I actually jealous of Scoots. Nah that can't be I mean sure she's awesome and funny and tough and here I am able to burn juice while trying to cook. Bu...." That last thought made her pause. Tears very soon began welling up in her eyes. But before she let her sadness take over she aggressively wiped her eyes.
"Come on Sweetie Belle. Pull yourself together, I mean by the same logic I should also feel the same way when around Apple Bloom. Hahaha... I remember when the two of us hoof-wrestled I couldn't even make her leg budge." Sweetie Belle paused for a second.
"She let me win. Now I remember how she looked at me... Her golden eyes were filled with sadness. She lowered her hoof trying to trick me into thinking that I was stronger than her, even Scootaloo called her out on that but she refused to admit." Sweetie Belle felt her chest constrict as an idea entered her head.
"W-was she pitying me?" Sweetie Belle felt a sudden rage enevloping her body so much so that she began stabbing her horn into the bark of a nearby tree, trying to calm herself down.
"They probably do think I'm a loser. How didn't I notice that sooner. Maybe they just hang around me cause they feel bad for me."
Sweetie Belle's horn had drilled through the tree by this point, something that she didn't mind all that much. If anything it provided her a nice and stable way to rest her head.
Sweetie Belle stood there motionlessly for a few seconds before she let out a small sob. Soon there was another one, and then another. She tried to compose her mind, she tried to distract herself by looking at the grass, she even tried to just close her eyes and meditate. But none of that worked. She could feel tears streaming down her pale cheeks, soaking the grass below. She quietly sobbed there under the beautiful autumn sky as the sun was just about to fully set.
Her heart felt as if it was being ripped from her chest. The idea that she was talentless hurt her, sure, but the thought of Scootaloo and Apple Bloom thinking of her as inferior hurt so much more. The downpour of tears never seemed to stop. She yelped and sobbed and sniffled, trying to ease the pain of her heart in any way she could.
When all else seemed to fail her, she let out a muffled hum. Tears didn't seem to subside but Sweetie continued. She hummed again and again. At first it was just a incoherent mess of sounds and mumbling but it soon started picking up both the pace and the rhytm.
Sweetie Belle soon found herself humming out a beautiful sounding melody that calmed her very being. She closed her eyes in an attempt to focus on her own voice. The humming was soon accompanied by hoofstomps as Sweetie's legs tried picking up a pace
Sweetie soon found herself singing. She wasn't sure what song it was, but it didn't sound half bad. In fact. It was actually pretty great. The tears that her beautiful green eyes shed had died down and her heart felt a rock lifted. A sweet smile soon spread itself across Sweetie Belle's muzzle. She suddenly felt at peace with her feelings and circumstances.
"Wow! Sweetie Belle. You have a beautiful voice" A memory flashed through her mind. It was a memory of Scootaloo. She started recalling a rather painful day that happened about a year ago. Scootaloo was trying out a new trick on her scooter which ended in a disaster. She got hurt pretty bad and was hospitalized. Sweetie couldn't recall the whole event. She was so scared back then that the whole thing now feels like a blurred image.
But one thing that she does remember is just how tough Scoots was. She did not shed a tear. She did groan and scream. But she absolutely refused to cry.
"She told me and Apple Bloom how Rainbow Dash would never cry because of some dumb injury, so why should she." That put a smile on Sweetie Belle's face. "Scootaloo is so cool. Dare I say she's even cooler than Rainbow Dash. I know that Scootaloo would never admit it but she really is the coolest in all of Ponyville. No, in all of Equestria is more like it."
"But. On the other hoof. I was a slobbering mess. I cried my heart out when we visited her in the hospital. I was so scared. I thought that I'd lose somepony who means so much to me. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom actually had to comfort me and not the other way around."
"It took me a few minutes. But after I calmed down I decided that it would be a good idea to sing a song to Scootaloo, to try and brighten the mood. I remember that moment as clear as the blue pond's water. It was an old song that Rarity taught me when I was a very young Filly. It's still one of my favorite songs. It always was. I remembered how Scootaloo looked me in the eyes. So did Apple Bloom. Even besides that, I'm pretty sure that the whole hospital heared me sing.
"They both sat there just listening to me sing. Not a word they spoke. I could tell that they were enjoying the song. It made me so happy I went all out and sang through the whole song."
"After I was done both Scootaloo and Apple Bloom pulled me into a tight hug. But what really surprised me was what Scoots said aftwrwards."
"She told me how beautiful my voice was. Scootaloo! Said that a mushy song was beautiful" Sweetie Belle still couldn't believe that actually happened.
"She told me that I could sing for her whenever I wanted to. My cheeks were beet red afterwards and so were Scootaloo's. Both of us and Apple Bloom started giggling like idiots afterwards. It was so much fun."
Sweetie Belle soon sprang back into the present, still standing in the same position where she left off. Her horn lodged into the tree. Her back now almost fully covered in leaves and the sky was almost dark. She struggled for a while trying to pull her horn out of the bark. Raising her front legs, she pushed vigorously against the tree.
After a couple of tries, Sweetie managed to violently remove her horn from the tree's damaged bark. She used so much force it actually sent her flying back a few feet.
*THUMP*
"Ouch!" Exclaimed Sweetie as she rubbed her back. She did not even hurt herself, it was more out of surprise than anything. She soon raised herself from the ground. Currently rocking her mane left and right to try and shake off leaves and dirt that were stuck to it After she decided that her mane was mostly clean, she did the same thing with her back. Managing to get rid of most leaves that nested there too.
She recomposed herself and took a few deep breaths. She finally felt at peace and as she raised her head her eyes she saw the beautiful pale moon above.
"W-woah." Sweetie Belle stammered. Luna's moon was just as beautiful as Celestia's Sun. It shimmered and shined from up above, piercing the night with its mesmerizing glow.
Sure. It was scary out at night time and Rarity was probably worried sick about her, but Sweetie Belle didn't really care at the moment. She suprisingly felt unphased by everything, her mind drifting off to the memory of a night that she experienced a few odd months ago.
During that night, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom were looking at the stars from the top of their clubhouse. The moon was just as beautiful then as it was tonight, perhaps even prettier. They both waited for Scootaloo to arrive. While the waited they sparked up a conversation. Talking about nothing in particular.
This memory of her and Apple Bloom meant so much to Sweetie Belle. But what exactly made it any different from so many others they were together, she was unsure of. Well for one Apple Bloom had removed her bow, letting her red hair float in the wind. But it was also the night when Apple Bloom showed something to Sweetie Belle. Something that is really not so important. But Sweetie Belle would be lying if she said that it didn't mean a world to her.
That was the night that Apple Bloom taught Sweetie Belle her family dance. It was a simple and plain dance, one that even a pony with two left hoofs could learn in no time but to Apple Bloom it was special. After the dance was over, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle shared a hug. Apple Bloom would probably not admit it, but she was beaming with pride and joy when Sweetie Belle told her how much she loved her dance.
All these memories had left Sweetie Belle smiling. She started remembering just how important she is to Scootaloo and Apple Bloom.
"So what if I'm not good at sports, or cooking or strong enough to hoof-wrestle against Apple Bloom. I'm a good singer, my magic is getting better and better and I try to do my best every time.
She gazed at the moon. Rethinking a lot of stuff about herself.
"Maybe life is all about the small things. Dancing with Apple Bloom. Singing to Scootaloo. It didn't earn us a cutie-marks but it made me happy. It made us happy."
Sweetie Belle felt herself becoming drowzy. She let out a loud moan and then a small smile appeared on her face.
"It's scary to think sometimes. My thoughts are my own worst enemy. I often feel like I'm just not good enough, but the truth is it's okay not to be special. I like my life. I love all the plans we come up with during crusading. I love Scootaloo and Apple Bloom.
I care about all my friends and family. Maybe that's enough. Just remembering all the things we did together over the years. The joy, the sadness, all the experiences. All the memories and times we had. I'm the luckiest filly that ever lived."
Sweetie Belle let out a happy, squeaky squeal as she started skipping and jumping happily in the direction of the Carousel Boutique.
The orange and red leaves still falling around her as she darted through the night. Her green eyes sparkled as she made her way into the streets of Ponyville. As she ran she noticed a lonely bench near a small playground. Nobody was around and while it was a bit scary at night, she figured that ten more minutes won't hurt
"This is the playground where I would often come to before I met Scootaloo and Apple Bloom. Back then I would often come here to think. Ever since she was a very small foal Sweetie Belle loved singing. Singing is something that Sweetie Belle always felt in her very soul. The time before she had just met Scoots and Bloom was a very hard period in her life. She remembered how others made fun of her blank flank and how other foals sometimes avoided her because they considered her weird.
During that time she would come to this park and sing the very same song that Rarity taught her. The same one she also sang to Scootaloo while she was in the hospital.
"A Unicorn Without A Horn" was the name of the song. It was about a young Unicorn who's horn fell off. The Unicorn believed that he would never feel happiness again. Then one night while the Unicorn galloped he saw a lonely Alicorn. He approached the crying Alicorn and asked him what's wrong. The Alicorn told him how he lost someone who was very dear to him. The Unicorn in return told the Alicorn how he lost his horn and was unable to feel happy. The two of them hugged as the moon shined above.
That was where the song ended. Leaving what happened to the two open to interpretation. While it was a bittersweet, if not an outright sad song, it always left Sweetie with a strange feeling inside her heart. It always made her feel sad, yet happy. It was a feeling like no other to her. There were nights where it would make her tear up, other times it would lift her spirits instead.
All she knew was that the song meant a lot to her. Sometimes there didn't have to be a reason. Sometimes you like something just because you do. That little fact always made Sweetie Belle smile. Knowing that there would always be something that could cheer her up. Even in the worst darkness there will always be a light, a spark of hope that will guide you through the night.
"But as much as I love the song, there is someone else who means so much more to me." Her thoughts went back to Scootaloo and Apple Bloom.
"What would I do without the two of them. I love them with all my heart. I will always be willing to put up with anything they want to do if it means just spending time with the two ponies that mean more than anything else to me."
Sweetie Belle sat there, feeling a cool breeze in her mane. She watched the beautiful leaves fall down all throughout the playground.
Sweetie Belle soon got up from the bench. She took in the sight for a couple more minutes before she finally began galloping back to the Botique where Rarity waited for her.
Her mind was filled with images of Scootaloo and Apple Bloom. The Pegasus and an Earth Pony that gave her so much strength to push on. She knew that tomorrow would be a bright day as long as she could spend it with the two of them.
While Sweetie Belle galloped off to the Carousel Boutique the moon glistened above her, as if to wish goodnight to the white Unicorn.