The Houvre: an institution once established to display the creative minds of Earth Ponies now lends its halls to arts of ponies everywhere; from crystal sculptures of the quaint Unicorn village of Bridlewood to the oil paintings of the finest artisans of the Pegasi utopia Zephyr Heights, it shares culture from far and wide in one place. During its opening hours, a lone unicorn colt wanders the ornate halls, head darting between paintings and sculptures, in awe of the surreal and mundane expressed in so many different ways. It was when he came across a corner that a particularly-eye-popping painting caught his attention. Surrounded by surreal paintings of smaller sizes is a landscape oil painting depicting a bridge before a fjord made of drab, uninteresting colours, but the true subject is in the foreground; an azure mare screaming in anguish with hooves against her cheeks, made of brighter colours that emphasize her truly-unique rainbow-patterned mane.
The colt couldn't help but glue his eyes on the painting when the sound of approaching trotting from behind awoke him from his trance. "Hey, kid, you okay there?" asked a concerned mare's voice.
"Huh?" he turns around, and is met by a yellow Earth Pony mare with a flowing pink mane wearing an artist's beret. "Hello. Who're you?"
"I'm Posey Bloom, the curator."
"Oh, cool, that means you know what these paintings are about, right?"
"Indeed." Posey turns to the right wall. All of the paintings you see here date back to Ancient Equestria, and most are sized copies by their original artists." She points to some of the surreal paintings. "And as you can see: two paintings depict the same subject, which suggests this mare may have been a popular model in ancient Equestria." She points to a cubism painting and a pop art painting depicting a mellow-mannered mare with thick dreadlocks.
"What about this one?" the colt points at the large painting above all others.
"This was given to us from Zephyr Heights as part of their cultural art exchange. Unlike the others in this collection, this is an original, and a well-made one. According to its handlers in Zephyr Heights, they barely needed to do restoration on it." Posey Bloom summarized rather excitedly.
"What's it called?"
"While painted by Steedvard Munch, the name is lost to history, but given many nicknames: Sutre, the Whinny of Nature, but I like to call it Colours of Despair, because of how vibrant the subject is compared to her surroundings."
"Who is she? And what is she whinnying about?"
"I'm not quite sure, but I'm sure it must've been so heart-wrenchingly terrible that it drove an artist to capture such a powerful emotion for themselves!"
Long, long ago in Ancient Equestria, Rainbow Dash sat on a stool at a bridge overlooking a beautiful fjord in scenic Neighway, looking content and happy, contrasting the despairing subject she would soon become and would be immortalized for. Before her is the back of a massive canvas on an easel, and behind that is a concentrating stallion, and Applejack; one of Rainbow Dash's closest friends. "Thanks fer offerin' ta paint Rainbow Dash, mister Munch. Ya jus' made this vacation of ours a whole lot better." Applejack thanked the stallion.
"Likewise. It's not every day I see a mare as vibrant as her, in both appearance and attitude." The artist responded with a Neighwegian accent. "She shall be my best muse yet! And this shall be my greatest piece yet!"
"How ya feelin' over there, Rainbow?" Applejack yelled to her friend from the other side of the canvas.
"I'm great! I won a raffle for an early copy of the upcoming Daring Do book, I got travel to Neighway with you for my latest aerial show, and I'm getting myself immortalized by the great Steedvard Munch out of nowhere! How could this day get any better?" Rainbow Dash answered excitedly.
"Ah-ah, Rainbow Dash." Steedvard raised his hoof. "Keep that smile of yours still until I finish."
At that moment, Rainbow Dash returns to her initial posture and smile. "So… how long do I have to be here?" Rainbow Dash asked through her teeth.
"An hour, perhaps. My last piece took three hours to complete." Steedvard answered.
"An hour? Rainbow Dash can't even stay still fer ten minutes!" Applejack blurted.
"Then could you ensure nothing distracts your friend? Concentration is vital to both the painter and his muse." Steedvard requested.
"Oh, if it means makin' Rainbow happy, then sure." Applejack acquiesced.
For the next hour, Rainbow Dash has remained still on her stool with only a couple instances of minor fidgeting. Applejack darts her head around for any outside threats to Steedvard's work when she spots a Pegasus stallion in a Wonderbolts uniform, recognizing him as Thunderlane. "What's he doin' here? He ain't part of Rainbow's show."
"Is that Thunderlane?" Rainbow Dash pointed to the dark grey blip in the sky.
"Lower your hoof, please." Steedvard requested.
Thunderlane was about to land towards them when Applejack signals him to land on the other end of the bridge, which he acknowledged with a salute. "I'll go check 'im out." Applejack said before crossing the bridge to meet Thunderlane.
"Applejack, can I speak to Rainbow Dash? It's urgent." Thunderlane requested.
"She's a lil tied up at the moment. Whaddya need to tell 'er?"
Thunderlane uncertainly scratches his neck. "Uh, you know the show she's scheduled to lead, right?"
"Riiight… aaand…?"
"It's cancelled." Thunderlane sighed.
"Cancelled?! Why's it cancelled?!"
"Soarin' somehow got lost in the Peaks of Peril, Surprise was injured during a birthday party, and Blaze—"
"That's almost half her team! What happened to reserve?!" Applejack asked.
"Filling in for other duties. We don't have enough hooves for her show."
"Oh, I'll tell her later. She ain't gonna like this." Applejack sighed before Thunderlane flies off.
"What did Thunderlane say?" Rainbow Dash asked Applejack as she returns to Steedvard's side.
Applejack opened her mouth to tell Rainbow Dash, but something told her it'd upset her and ruin the painting. "Uh, I'll tell ya later." Applejack sheepishly smiled.
"Oookay, then." Rainbow Dash droned, weirded-out by Applejack's behaviour.
"Hush." Steedvard insisted.
Applejack turns around to wipe the sweat off her brow. "Hope we don't have any sudden bad news like that from now on."
Applejack continues to watch Rainbow Dash and Steedvard paint, when she notices Rainbow Dash smacking her lips. "Hey, need some water?" Applejack asked.
"Nah, I'm good." Rainbow Dash dismissed.
Then, Applejack sees in the sky another flying shadow, and when it parts through the clouds, reveals a grey mailmare with uneven eyes waving at them. "Hey, ain't that…?"
"Mail? All the way out here? Somepony must've paid extra for express." Rainbow Dash chuckled before Steedvard hushes her.
"Sit tight, I'll get it fer ya." Applejack told Rainbow Dash before meeting the mailmare on the other end of the bridge. Once Applejack's hoofs touch the soft snow, she awaits the mailmare to land, only for her to splash into the fjord.
After trotting out of the water, the mailmare shakes herself dry before approaching Applejack. "Oh, hi, Applejack. I've got mail for Rainbow Dash."
"She's busy. I'll take it fer her." Applejack insisted.
"Okay!" the mailmare opens her mail carrier and hoofs her an envelope. Unusually, it was stamped "OPEN NOW!" in green. "Oh, there was something else I needed to tell you, but I'm having a hard time remembering what is was…" The mailmare scratches her head as Applejack opens the envelope.
Applejack unfolds the note, and was horrified to see its contents. In scraggly writing made of green ink, it read "I'M COMING FOR YOUR TEAM, THEN I'M COMING FOR YOU. GET READY AND GET SET, RAINBOW DASH" marked with a green lightning bolt. In shock, she tosses it away. "Who sent this threatenin' note?!" she asked the mailmare desperately.
"I dunno." The mailmare shrugged before widening her eyes. "Oh, now I remember! I was supposed to send this three days ago, silly me!"
"Three days ago?!"
"What happened three days ago?" Rainbow Dash shouted to Applejack.
"Uh, well—" Applejack panics.
"I forgot to send your mail!" the mailmare blurted.
"Of course you did." Rainbow Dash rolls her eyes before Steedvard beckons her attention.
"Who'd we know goes by a green lightnin' bolt?" Applejack wondered as the mailmare leaves. "There's that gaudy stunt team that rolled into town once. What're their names, 'gain? Washboard? Whiteout?"
"Rainbow Daaash!" Applejack's ears picks up a distant roar, and scans the area for the source. Then, she sees a teal shadow rocketing towards her. When she focuses her eyes, she sees a teal Pegasus mare with slicked-back yellow mane, parting the snow below with her flight's turbulence whilst wearing a rageful face: Rainbow Dash's self-proclaimed rival Lightning Dust.
"Hey, A.J.," Rainbow Dash casually called to her friend. "Can ya get some water? I think I'm actually drying out."
"Sure thing, sugarcube!" Applejack nervously obliges and gallops towards the foe. "Oh, of all days fer one o' Rainbow Dash's blunders ta bite her back…" Applejack groans as she gets some distance away from Rainbow Dash and closer to Lightning Dust.
Lightning Dust spots Applejack in her way and grits her teeth. "Get outta the way, or I'll make you!"
Applejack turns around, plants her forelegs into the ground, and winds her hindlegs for a mean bucking. "Ya ain't ruinin' our vacation, whoever you are!"
As Lightning Dust steps on the gas, her face is blinded by a sudden snowball, causing her to lose concentration and fly right into Applejack's bucking hooves, catapulting her the way she came. "I'll get her next tiiime!" Lightning Dust shouted before disappearing into the horizon.
When Applejack turns around to see her fly off, she also spots her helper: a silver stallion wearing a cowboy hat much like hers hiding his face and a brown jacket long enough to hide his flank, tossing a single snowball up and down. "Thanks fer the assist, stranger."
In response, the stranger tosses a piece of paper fast enough to cut through the air, which Applejack catches with ease. "Have you seen this guy? He's a friend of mine. His name's Juggler."
On the paper, Applejack sees an artist's rendition of a copper stallion with a black-and-red mess of a mane, wearing a black suit, and a spiky piercing covering the edge of his left ear. "Can't say I have." When Applejack raises her head to the stranger, he tosses a water bottle.
"Thank you. If you see him, tell me."
"How'm I supposed to tell ya if I don't know ya?"
"The world is round. We'll run into each other eventually." The stallion answered before putting a harmonica to his mouth and begins playing a dramatic, slow tune as he walks away from Applejack.
Weirded-out by the strange encounter, Applejack looks down at the water bottle, shrugs, and returns to Rainbow Dash.
When she returns to the bridge, Applejack hoofs the bottle to Rainbow Dash. "What took ya so long?" Rainbow Dash asked her.
"Eh, jus' bumped into a couple strangers."
The painting continues, until Rainbow Dash stirs in place more, agitating both herself and Steedvard. "Can we hurry up? I've got an early copy of the newest Daring Do back at the hotel to soak in before public release." Rainbow Dash groaned. "It features the return of Mareion Ravenhoof, who I totes ship with Daring Do! If she gets with anypony other than her, I'll flip!"
"Could you please sit still?! It's only been an hour!" Steedvard insisted.
"If you expect me to sit still that long, I gotta have a Daring Do book in front of me."
"That's it! Five minute break, but you better be in the same spot, smiling the same way as before, or the entire piece is ruined!" Steedvard burst into anger as he trots away.
"Ya really gonna blow a gasket if two characters don't get hitched the way ya wanna?" Applejack inquired.
"Yeah." Rainbow Dash pouts.
"That sounds like an excuse to get angry jus' because." Applejack crosses her legs in disbelief.
"You don't get it! It's not like any other cockamamie ship like DariZotl, or DariShot, or Celestia forbid… DariLleron!"
"Say wha—?"
"She has serious chemistry with Mareion in every book! The way they play off each other ain't like how Daring treats any other character! They. Are. In. Love!"
"Rainbow Dash, is that you?"
Rainbow Dash turns her head a full 180 to see her idol A.K. Yearling approach with a waving hoof. She zooms over to her, an inch shy of her nose. "I can't believe it! You're here!"
"Well, fancy seeing you here, too. How's the book I sent you?"
"I haven't found the time, but when I get to the hotel I…" Rainbow Dash trails off when she sees a brown, grey-bearded stallion with a polo and flat cap come up from behind A.K. Yearling. "Doc- I mean, Groom Q.Q. Martingale? You're here, too?"
"As you can see, I am." 'Groom' answered.
"I thought you travel alone. Why's he here?" Rainbow Dash asked A.K. Yearling.
"Well…" A.K. Yearling blushed before 'Groom' takes the lead.
"We've been travelling so long together; we've started to grow very close. After years of adversity, we looked past our differences and gazed upon the treasure within each other."
"W-what are you saying?" Rainbow Dash asked nervously.
"Rainbow Dash… we're in love." A.K. Yearling stares into 'Groom's' chartreuse irises, and he her rose eyes.
"B-b-but what about Mareion Ravenhoof?!"
"Her? We're just friends. The professor would kill me if I dated his daughter." A.K. Yearling shot back before 'Groom' redirects her stare into his.
"Don't worry about her. It's just the two of us now." He assured her before they kiss.
"No." Seeing their lips peck, Rainbow Dash's world was shattered. "No!" Her heart sank like a ship on an iceberg, falling to the ocean of despair. "Nooo! My headcanooon!" she threw her head up to the sky, screaming her lungs out like a siren.
As he tucks into a sandwich slice from his lunchbox, Steedvard turns to this pathetic scene played out by Rainbow Dash; enamoured by such a powerful display of hopelessness. "Magnificent… magnificent! This is exactly what was looking for!" Steedvard giddily picks up Rainbow Dash from where she stood and placed her back on the stool, still screaming her head off, and goes double-time on the painting.
"Did we come at a bad time?" A.K. Yearling asked Applejack.
"Yeeeaaah…" Applejack embarrassingly glances at Rainbow Dash, scrunching her face in shame. "You lovebirds mosey on, now."
"And mosey we shall." 'Groom' smiled before he and A.K. Yearling flee the scene.
After what felt like an eternity of broken dreams, Rainbow Dash falls onto her back, staring at the cloudy night sky. "It's over… it's all over… I'll never enjoy Daring Do the same way again."
"Oh, thank Celestia yer done." Applejack came up to her face.
"How long was I screaming?"
"Two hours, give or take." Applejack answered as she helps up her friend. "Plenty of time fer Mister Munch ta finish yer picture." She gestures to the distant artist admiring his latest creation.
"I thought it was ruined." Rainbow Dash raises an eyebrow.
"Apparently, he really liked it when yer screamin'. Guess it's an artsy-pony thing." Applejack answered, equally confused.
"My greatest creation yet!" Steedvard was absolutely beaming at his creation when he turns the canvas around to the mares.
The moment Rainbow Dash sees the painting, her despair transforms into an impressed eyebrows-raise. "Huh." She gazes at the fresh oil splotched and stroked against the canvas shaping her distressed form.
"What do you think? Is it a perfect snapshot of your most vulnerable moment? A flawless capture of your misery?" Steedvard inquired his muse excitedly.
"Never thought I'd look this good in oil, especially when I'm screaming. Not bad, not bad." Rainbow Dash nods in amusement.
"I must thank you for your services as a muse. You shall be immortalized for years, maybe centuries to come, long after we have passed!" Steedvard thanked her.
"Whaddya gonna name it?" Applejack asked Steedvard.
"Too soon to say, but it'll come to me." Steedvard answered before packing up the painting. "If you excuse me, I shall take my leave. See you at the art gallery!" He bid his goodbye before trotting off.
"Rainbow, ya feelin' 'kay?" Applejack asked her.
"Don't sweat it. It's not the end of the world, plus I'm gonna get even more famous than I already am!" Rainbow Dash assured Applejack. "Although I might not enjoy that early copy as much as I should now… aaand I'll never see MareiDare the same again."
"It's been a long day, an' I'm sure ya need a tall glass o' water back at the hotel." Applejack added.
"A tall-? *COUGHS*" Rainbow Dash hacked her throat, strained from the hours-long screaming.
"Or two." Applejack chuckled before they walk off the bridge.
"If that book ruins me, at least I got a full day of supersonic flying to look forward to!"
"'Bout that…"
In the present, the colt and Posey Bloom stare at the painting. "Perhaps we'll never know why she's screaming. It's only a story ponies back then would know." Posey concluded.
"Oooh…" the colt hummed in awe at the painting. "Well, that was cool. I'm gonna wander off again. Thank you miss curator!" he then eagerly trots away.
"Thank hoofness foals nowadays still appreciate art." Posey sighed in relief before a cry hits her ear.
She turns to find the royal guards Zoom and Thunder sitting before a pitch-black painting, the latter absolutely bawling. "I don't get it… but I can feel it!" Thunder cries as Zoom comforts him.
"Oh, this piece? This has been here forever." Posey approaches them. "It's called A Thousand Nights in a Hallway, painted by Spearhead."
"What can you tell us about it?" Zoom asked.
"Well, like you two, Spearhead was a guard in ancient Equestria…"
THE END
