Soulmates and Leftovers (Doubles and Singles and Nothings At All)
Wallflower sat on a bench in front of Canterlot High School, waiting for one of her parents to remember to pick up their daughter and give her a ride home from school.
Two Twilight Sparkles walked past, holding hands. They had eyes only for each other, whispering in each other's ears.
Wallflower sighed.
A Pinkie Pie bounced across the lawn towards her. "Wally! I'm so happy to see you here!"
"Why's that?"
"Because now I can invite you YET AGAIN to my special mixer. This could be your chance to--"
"Pinkie, I know you've been planning this party for weeks. But there isn't any point anymore. Ever since everyone knows about the Portals, and everyone even knows how to get their own R63 gender conversion ray...practically everyone has already FOUND a 'special someone' who understands them better than anyone else ever could. Someone who...well, you know what's been going on around here."
"Sure do!" Pinkie said. "But that isn't the only way to find a special somepony!"
"Listen to yourself. 'Special somepony.' You're talking like THEM now. And if your 'special somepony' is a pony, maybe that's fine. Maybe that makes you happy. Maybe you love your pony self, and she loves you. But there isn't anyone over there like that for me. And now that everyone has decided loving their own self is the greatest love of all...I'm just a leftover. I mean, I was always a leftover, but now there's no way I'll ever be anything else."
"Aw, don't give up so soon. There's still hope for you."
"Yeah, that's what I used to think. But now I know better. So just go away and leave me alone, ok?"
Pinkie hugged Wallflower, who tried to push the enthusiastic girl away. After a moment, Pinkie released her classmate. "Sorry, Wally. But I really hope you'll reconsider."
Pinkie walked away, pouting.
A tall, muscular shirtless man with long pink hair ran across the lawn. Riding on his shoulders, Fluttershy giggled.
"Oh, for..." Wallflower grumbled. "Do you HAVE to show off like that?"
Fluttershy's hands played in the man's hair. "This is wonderful," she said. "I was just wondering...later on...if you'd like to..."
The man nodded.
The two walked around the corner of the building.
***
Principal Celestia and Vice Principal Luna walked past, slowly.
Luna asked her sister, "Going to Equestria again, this evening?"
Celestia smiled. "My other self offered to give me more flying lessons. Flying through the sky with wings of my own! Can you imagine it?"
Luna pursed her lips. "Lately I've been having the oddest dreams. So I suppose I CAN imagine it."
Celestia put her hand on her sister's shoulder. "So come along! I'm sure Princess Luna would love to meet you."
Luna said, "I have...paperwork to do. For the school. A lot of things to take care of."
"You can't be busy EVERY night, sis. You have to remember to live a little."
"Do you and Celestia ever talk about her other job? Raising and lowering the sun?"
"Do we! She said if I get good enough at flying, after that the sun might be the next lesson. She said she really wants to find out if I can do it. Because if I can...that would be a backup for her. It's a good idea to have more than one responsible pony who can take care of things like that. Just in case."
Luna said, "I see. I'm sure that's true. But...today I'm not coming. Maybe next week."
"You have to meet yourself! Your other self, I mean. You two will have SO much in common!"
Luna murmured, "That's what I'm afraid of." She turned and went back inside the school.
***
Sunset hurried across Canterlot Gorge, her feet making the bridge's pedestrian walkway ring and echo. As she neared the green-haired girl sitting with her legs dangling off the span's edge, Sunset slowed her steps.
"So," Sunset said. "I couldn't help but notice. You're sitting on the part of the Canterlot Gorge Bridge where the canyon is deepest, wearing a warm jacket. Even though the weather is sunny and beautiful."
Wallflower didn't even bother to turn her head and look. "Hello, Sunset."
"And your jacket looks...lumpy."
"Yes." Wallflower sighed. "My jacket is full of rocks. If I fall off the bridge and hit deep water, I would sink, not float."
"Want to talk about it?"
"Not really."
"Mind if I join you?"
"I'd rather you didn't."
Sunset sat down anyway. She kept her own legs entirely on the walkway. "If you stop to talk with me, what have you got to lose?" Sunset asked.
Wallflower sighed. "Nothing, I guess."
"I know I don't know what's going on with you. What it's like."
Wallflower clenched her fists. "At least I didn't used to be...the only one. Practically the only one. It was easier for me, that way. Not like now."
Sunset didn't reply.
A minute later, Wallflower said, "If only Princess Twilight hadn't done it."
"Done what?"
"Let everyone know about the Portals. That we could go to Equestria. That the Equestrians can come here, whenever they want to. And about how we can R63 ourselves anytime we want to."
Sunset nodded. "It is pretty weird, seeing everyone get into it."
"They don't even think it's weird anymore!" Wallflower's hand slammed the bridge's deck. "Ouch. It seems like almost everyone but me is just fine with it. They all love it. Everyone gets someone who really understands them. Mutual understanding and love. What's not to like?"
"I think you've found something not to like."
"Oh, fuck you, Sunset Shimmer. I don't want to talk about it." Wallflower picked up her purse, and thrust it towards Sunset. "I know why you're here. And the way you came here when you saw me on the bridge with all these rocks in my jacket PROVES it."
"What?"
"I know you've stopped threatening people for their lunch money. Because you've found something better."
"Oh?"
"I saw you in the Astronomy lab, with a telescope. And I've seen you use your phone to look at a webcam you put on this bridge. I know you watch to see when someone is getting ready to throw themselves off the edge."
"Um."
"Because in THIS world, there aren't any pegasi to fly up and rescue people. So if somepony comes to THIS world to jump off a bridge, no one can save them in time. After they die, you go through their pockets or their purse, and take anything valuable. And THAT'S how you make ends meet as a high school student trying to live in this world, while you don't even have proper citizenship papers to help you get a job."
Sunset lunged towards the purse...and past it, grabbing Wallflower tightly.
"Let go of me! Let me go!"
"Do you think that's how things are for me? That I just watch the bridge like...a vulture? Some kind of heartless scavenger?"
"Sure. Isn't that how you've always been? Looking for people's weaknesses, and taking advantage of them?"
"I'm trying to change! Don't you even know what's been going on with me and my new friends here? Haven't you noticed me trying?"
"Sure," Wallflower said. "Princess Twilight came to this world, and she found you having a little 'oh I'm so evil' crisis, and she saved you. You tried to take her crown away from her, and you tried to brainwash everyone into being your obedient little slaves, and she made all nicey-nicey with you. Because at least she noticed you were in trouble. The more trouble you made, the crueler you were, the more she at least noticed you. At least she noticed you were in trouble!" Wallflower hit Sunset's side. "At least someone noticed!" Sunset adjusted her grip on Wallflower, to hold the other girl's arms against her sides. Wallflower wriggled and screamed. But after a little while, she stopped struggling.
After a few minutes, Sunset said, "Isn't this kind of nice?"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"At least we're hugging. So this isn't ALL bad."
Wallflower laughed, and sobbed, both at the same time. "You're crazy, you know that? 'At least we're hugging.'"
"You told me a little about what it's like to be you. Would you like to know what it's like to be me?"
"I already know that. You're pretty, and popular, and tough and smart and even though you were the most horrible, nasty and evil bitch to everyone in the whole school for three years, somehow everyone has forgiven you like it was nothing. Because they care about you, and they don't give a piece of fertilizer about me. Because people suck."
Sunset said, "Have you ever met my 'special someone?'"
Wallflower said, "Everyone knows Flash Sentry."
"Now Flash Sentry is dating his other self, in Equestria."
"Great. So you can go to Equestria, and you and your Equestrian self and both of Flash Sentry can go on a double date. I'm very happy for you."
"I'm FROM Equestria."
Wallflower blinked. "What?"
"So far as I know, I was born in Equestria. I grew up there. I didn't always feel I fit in, but...I studied and practiced unicorn magic as hard as I could. I was an EXCELLENT unicorn-style mage. For magical power, strength and skill, I was top of my class. Probably the best of my generation."
"So what are you doing here, in this world? Why don't you go back and be the strongest witch in Equestria, and leave us alone?"
"Like I said, I didn't feel like I fit in. So I came through a Portal, and then I got stuck here for a while." Sunset sighed. "I learned to like it here, kind of. And then when I made friends with Princess Twilight and some other people, she taught me some things. Things I'd never had any idea I could learn. This summer, after I graduate from high school, I don't even know which world I might want to live in. Because both worlds have their good points and their bad points."
"Great. I'm so happy for you, you've got TWO worlds where you could be happy. But I don't have anyplace."
"But there's one thing this world, and Equestria too, DOESN'T have for me. I don't think anyplace has it. And that's...another me."
"Figures. You're so cool and SO perfect, no one else could be like you. This fucking world. I hate it. I hate BOTH the worlds. Because everyone thinks you're the best and loves you."
Sunset snorted. "Lately, everyone is too busy 'loving themselves' to pay much attention to me. And certainly not in THAT way. Not in the way Flash Sentry used to love me, kind of."
"Oh."
"What I'm trying to say is...Wallflower, have you ever been kissed?"
"Kind of."
"'Kind of.' Sounds like there's some things you've missed out on. Things you've never even gotten to try."
"I'm sure it would suck anyway."
"But I've never gotten to do those things either. Go on a date with a cute girl...holding hands...maybe a little more..."
Wallflower sighed. "Fine. I give up. I'll give you a chance."
"Thank you!" Sunset said. "I just hope you won't regret it. I'll try so hard to keep you from feeling as alone as I'VE been feeling ever since this whole 'be your own special somepony' thing seemed to...take over the world. Took over TWO worlds."
Wallflower said, "I really need to go use the bathroom. Is it ok if we get up and go somewhere?"
"Can I hold onto at least ONE of your hands until we get off the bridge? Just in case?"
Wallflower laughed, for the first time in a while. "Sure. Let's try that."
"I'm so happy!" Sunset enthused.
One of Sunset's hands clamped tightly onto one of Wallflower's. The two girls stood up, and walked towards the end of the bridge closest to Canterlot.
Wallflower thought, this didn't seem like the worst thing in the world. At least she was getting to try something new, holding hands with the hottest girl at CHS.
Maybe it would be ok.
Soulmates and Leftovers (Doubles and Singles and Nothings At All)
Soon, the pair reached Sunset's motorcycle, which was parked beside the road, just beyond the nearer end of the bridge.
Sunset said, "I'd really like to take you out on a date. Maybe a nice dinner? But there's something I have to take care of, first."
"Um...ok?"
"Just wait right here. Please." Sunset walked rapidly into the woods.
When she was out of Wallflower's sight, Sunset turned onto a narrow path. She followed the path to a line of concrete stairs built into a steep hillside. She stepped onto the topmost stair, and started trotting downward.
"I guess every day is leg day, when you're me," she said to herself. "Gotta keep in shape...or else."
After literally dozens of flights of stairs, Sunset reached the bottom of the gorge. She pushed her way between rocks and brambles and tall weeds. "Come on," Sunset told herself. "You can do this. Even if you couldn't reach her in time, you can still try to do something for her family."
Sunset tripped, sprawling across some muddy ground. "Mother of Celestia's--" She glanced back the way she'd come.
Sunset had tripped over a corpse.
"This is the WORST job," she said. Sunset crawled to the corpse, where she ran her hands skillfully across the clothed body. She found a wallet.
It had some bits inside, but Sunset didn't take them. She just put the bits and wallet back. As of the last few months, Sunset was on the Equestrian government's payroll.
Sunset reached inside her own leather jacket, pulling out a small notebook. The notebook's pages were ensorcelled so that any message written within would also appear in another world.
Dear Equestrian Government, Dept. of Human World Affairs
I found another jumper. ID says Winter Breeze. When somepony comes to this world to try to end things by jumping off a tall building or a bridge, why is it so often pegasi?
Do they think it will feel almost like flying? Because from what I've seen, it's not. I doubt there's anything else so horrible for a pegasus as trying to fly, and suddenly realizing your wings don't work anymore. Because you don't have any.
Sunset used her phone to check and double-check the location.
Even though I couldn't reach Winter in time to save her, when I got to the bridge there was an odd coincidence. Someone else was already there, a human local who had her jacket full of rocks. I think she might have been about to jump.
Maybe it would help Winter's family and friends feel just the tiniest bit less agony about what happened to Winter, if you tell them Winter died helping to save someone else's life. I'm not sure whether that's a huge exaggeration, or not. But I guess it's close enough to the truth.
Apologetically,
Patrolpony Sunset Shimmer
Sunset sighed. From her carryall bag she pulled out a large piece of cloth.
Sunset laid the cloth out on the ground, and wrapped the body into a bundle.
Finally, Sunset put one hand on the bundle, and whispered the words of an activating spell. In a flash of light, the bundle disappeared.
***
Sunset climbed the stairs less quickly than she'd hurried down them. By the time she reached her motorcycle, Wallflower was fidgeting.
"Hi," Sunset said. "Sorry I took so long."
Wallflower asked, "What were you doing?"
Sunset took a deep breath. "I guess there's no point in trying to keep it a secret from you." She pulled her little notebook out of her jacket's inside pocket, and handed it to Wallflower.
Wallflower opened the notebook to the first page, and read silently. "This is your after school job? Working for Equestria? Reporting ponies who...didn't want to live anymore?"
Sunset nodded. "Reporting pony deaths is part of it. Ever since Starswirl's portal spell leaked, and everypony found out how to create portals...a lot of things are different now. Ponies come to the human world to take advantage of a lot of different opportunities. To find their soulmate, someone who they believe can understand them better than anyone else ever could. To buy and sell things that are rare in one world, but common in another. There's some drug smuggling, too. And...this. Most pegasi aren't afraid of heights. For them, if somepony wants to die...I guess this seems like the least scary way to do it, for a lot of them."
"I never would have thought..." Wallflower's voice trailed off.
"I don't think most ponies thought about it, not really. Or they would have done a better job of keeping Starswirl's spell secret."
"I guess not. I'm so sorry, Sunset."
Sunset tried to smile. "Look on the good side, Wally. Someone stopped you, before it was too late. Because I can guarantee you, whatever problems you have in this world...someone would have missed you. The people who would have missed you might not be good at showing you how they feel, what you mean to them...but there's always someone, or someones. No exception."
Wallflower sniffled. "I'm a terrible person."
"Come on," Sunset said. "Put on this helmet, so I can give you a ride." She straddled her bike.
Wallflower climbed awkwardly on behind her.
"Hold on tight."
Driving very carefully, never going faster than fifteen or so miles per hour, Sunset gave Wallflower a ride back into town.
Author's Note
I thought it was interesting that some fimfic people seem to be SO ENTHUSIASTIC about selfcest. So I wondered, what if everyone at CHS (or even everyone in TWO worlds) felt the same way?
And what about the people without known counterparts, the 'leftovers?'
