Two Thin Coats

by RunicTreetops

Rating: everyone
Tags: Anon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Second Person, Warhammer, Romance, Comedy, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Human
Length: 2289

Celestia really wants to relate to you more. As a result, she asked you to teach her how to build and paint those models you're so fond of. She... really isn't into it.

Life is crazy. Never mind the whirlwind that was winding up in Equestria in the first place; being married to an alicorn ex-princess doesn't exactly lend itself well to a quiet lifestyle. As such, your little hobby of building and painting Warhammer 40,000 models offers you some nice, calm respite.

Now, Celestia, who has been feeling self-conscious about not being able to relate to you, wants you to teach her about the hobby. You're more than willing to do so, and you're a very patient man.

Unfortunately, she isn't a very patient mare.

Cover art partially edited by Shadow of Death.

Published 2023-09-09 10:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-09-09 10:20:01 UTC

Two Thin Coats

"There are just... so many."

"I know. It's beautiful, isn't it?"

"That's one word for it, I suppose."

You and your wife, the ex-princess Celestia, stand before a large, flat wall. Many shelves are mounted upon this wall, each displaying dozens upon dozens of plastic boxes depicting small models. These models take many forms and come in all shapes and sizes. The many, many options to choose from throw Celestia off guard. She knew about this little hobby of yours, but she didn't realize how in-depth it all is.

"Well? See one you like?"

"Frankly, sunshine, it's hard to tell. I'm not quite sure what I'm looking at."

"Well, they're separated by faction, so let's do a brief rundown, shall we?"

"S-sure, sunshine."

You give your wife a smile before slowly and carefully going over each faction in as simple of terms as possible. The ponies in the cool armor are the Space Marines, soldiers created for the sole purpose of battle. The green beast-like creatures are Orks, a race of aliens that love war. The scary bugs are Tyranids, creatures that consume all organic life in their path.

This conversation goes on for a while, and you do everything in your power to not start Celestia down the rabbit hole that is Warhammer 40,000 lore. Eventually, you finish your explanations and turn back to her with a sheepish grin on your face.

"But don't forget the most important thing here."

"And what's that?"

"Rule of cool."

"Rule of cool?"

"Pick whichever one you think is the coolest. Never mind their story, or how they work in the game. Since you said you wanted to get into the hobby like I do, and all I do is build and paint models I like, then all you should worry about is picking out a kit you think looks like fun."

"Hmm..."

Celestia squints her eyes as she examines the boxes in more detail. In the meantime, you quickly glance around the rest of the hobby shop. A few ponies are in the extra space behind the counter playing a few games of Warhammer themselves, though it's clear that they're all quite distracted by the presence of your lovely wife. She is still more or less a celebrity, you suppose, and you doubt that they ever expected to see her visit someplace like this.

A few moments later, Celestia smiles and nods to herself before using her magic to grab a box from the top shelf. She happily levitates it towards you and lets you take a look.

"Custodes, huh? Not a bad choice. And... somewhat fitting for you, actually."

"I just like how bright and in-your-face their armor is. Hah, I should have gotten something like that for the Royal Guard!"

The two of you share a laugh as you make the purchase. She picked out a squad of five units, each a stallion clad in big, gold armor and wielding massive weapons and shields. They're a bit more complex than some other options she could have picked, but you're not going to judge. Learning and getting better is half the fun, after all!

After exchanging a glance and a nod, the two of you depart from the hobby shop and head back to your quiet Ponyville home. Luckily for Celestia, you already have a pair of cutters, plenty of glue, and every shade of paint and primer she could ever need.

This should be interesting.

Celestia looks at the table in front of her with a confused expression. The collection of gray plastic sprues spread out before her seems to put her on edge.

"Hm? What's up, Tia?"

"Wh-what are these?"

"The sprues? Those are the parts you'll use to build the models."

"The PARTS?"

"...Yes?"

"I thought they came packaged like this!"

Celestia holds up the box and points to the professionally painted, finished models pictured on the front.

"Haha! Not at all! Where would be the fun in that?"

"What do you mean?"

"At that point, it'd just be basic figure collecting. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but that's not exactly the appeal of Warhammer."

"So... I need to build them?"

"Right."

"And then paint them?"

"Yup! I'm not sure why you seem so surprised by that, though. You've seen me doing both of those things before."

"I never really connected the dots. I didn't realize that these hunks of plastic and the finished models were the same thing. A-and I thought that when you were painting, you were just customizing already finished models."

"Nope, it's all done from scratch."

"..."

"...Having second thoughts?"

"N-no! I can do this! Pass me those cutters!"

Retrieving the instruction manual, a half-filled bottle of plastic glue and your well-used cutters, Celestia gets to work on putting together her first model. You lean back and watch as she struggles to do so, occasionally answering a question clarifying where something is supposed to go or where she is supposed to cut. All the while, a smile is plastered onto your face.

You and Celestia have been married for a few years now. The two of you get along extremely well, despite the fact that you're an alien from another world. Beyond the physical differences, you're both just extremely different individuals. She's much more social and prone to seeking out thrills and fun. Meanwhile, you're much more reserved, capable of relishing in the peace and quiet. You'd think this would cause some friction in your relationship, but surprisingly, it only makes you love each other even more. She pushes you outside your comfort zone to see and experience things you never would otherwise, while you help her learn how to relax after over a thousand years of having the most stressful job in Equestria. All in all, things are going pretty great.

However, your lovely wife approached you a few days ago as you were painting a Necron. She's seen you doing things like this before, but she never really questioned it. You were surprised by her sudden interest, but you explained that the process of building and painting models is, to you, a relaxing yet fulfilling pastime. Apparently, this piqued her curiosity. She expressed disappointment in her inability to relate to most of your hobbies, and a little while later, she asked if she could give it a try.

Now, here you are, watching with great interest as she slowly places the head onto her first model, finally finishing it.

"I did it!"

"Hoho, look at that!" You walk around the table, placing your hands on her shoulders and giving her a quick kiss on the cheek before inspecting the model in a bit more detail. "Ooo, uhh..."

"Hm? What's wrong?"

"I think you used the wrong shoulder piece."

Celestia looks at the model's shoulders. Sure enough, one of them is on backwards and was clearly designed for one of the other models in the kit.

"Dang it! H-how do I undo it?"

"The glue is mostly dry already. I wouldn't recommend trying to pry it off, you could make it worse. Since it's your first model, let's just run with it, okay?"

"Ugh... that's going to bother me to no end."

"It's okay! We all make mistakes like this. And it's your first time! I certainly wasn't expecting you to get it perfect!"

You also choose not to mention the many noticeable scratch marks and plastic nubs from where she cut poorly. The poor mare might have a heart attack if you do so.

Celestia sighs before speaking up again.

"Fine, if you say so. What's next?"

"Well, that's up to you. Your kit has five total models in it. You could start on the second, or if you'd prefer to see the other half of the process, we could try to paint this one here."

After some deliberation, Celestia seems to come to a decision.

"Let's paint that one, that way I know what the whole procedure is like from beginning to end."

"Sure! I'll go grab some primer."

"Okay, so what now?"

Celestia once again sits before the model, now primed, dried, and ready to be painted. A plethora of bottles, many brushes, some paper towels, a paint palette, and a cup of water surround her, and she looks around at them as though she's completely overwhelmed.

"Well, let's start with this: How do you want to paint them?"

"I thought they were supposed to be gold?"

"That's what they are on the box, but they're YOUR models, Tia. You can paint them however you like."

"...I-I think I'll stick with gold."

"Sure. We can start with your base coats, then. Luckily for you, I have some base gold right here." You set the appropriate bottle in front of her, as well as a small brush. Celestia grabs the brush and nearly dips it into the paint before you stop her. "Woah woah woah! Not so fast!"

"What's wrong?"

"You'll want to pour a little bit of the paint onto your palette, then add some water to it bit by bit until you get the consistency you want. Here, let me show you."

You guide the alicorn through the motions of preparing the paint and using small strokes to check when the consistency of said paint is just right.

"I would have never thought to do that."

"I'm not saying it's impossible without doing that, but you're far less likely to get it all goopy and uneven. Now, remember what I told you while we were priming it?"

"Uh... 'two thin coats?'"

"Exactly. Two thin base coats. Go over the whole model with that one color, then go over it again."

The two of you slowly go through the entire painting process, from base coats, to details, to highlights, to even some more advanced techniques like dry brushing. Finally, the model is painted. You quickly show her how to texture the base, and her first ever model is completely finished.

"There you go! Your very first Custodes!"

The two of you look at the model. To be frank, it doesn't look incredible. The shoulder is wrong, the paint job is very clearly an amateur's work, and there are a few misplaced splotches and uneven sections that make the whole thing look... less than professional. However, it doesn't look terrible, either. It certainly looks better than YOUR first attempt, that's for sure.

"So this is what the hobby is like."

"Sure is! How do you like it?"

"..."

Celestia narrows her eyes and looks away from you. It's an expression you don't see from her all that often.

"Tia?"

"...I-it's fun!"

She suddenly turns back to you and gives you an obviously forced smile. You give her a gentle one right back.

"Come on, Tia. You're obviously lying."

"..."

"What's wrong?"

After a few silent moments, she sighs once again.

"It... it really wasn't fun. I felt stressed the whole time I was building it, I thought painting it was long and tedious, I have a headache, and the darn thing doesn't even look very good!" You open your mouth to speak, but she puts a hoof up to stop you. "And yes, I get it. I'll 'get better with time.' But even setting the quality of the model aside, I just... didn't like it."

She looks you in the eyes once more, her expression disheartened and somewhat apologetic. With your smile widening, you lean forwards and wrap your wife in a sudden, tight hug. She blushes as she attempts to compose herself following your sudden display of affection.

"Good for you, Tia."

"S-Sunshine? You aren't upset?"

"Why would I be?" You pull back and hold her two front hooves in your hands. "You gave the hobby, something that we both know is far from your comfort zone, a genuine shot for my sake. You put up with the entire process to see if you could relate to me, even though it clearly wasn't your thing from the get-go. How could I be anything but happy?"

"Surely you'd be happier if I DID enjoy it."

"Mmm... not particularly. What's important to me is that YOU have fun. Yes, I enjoy building and painting models, but that doesn't mean you have to!"

"Still, I feel as though I'm letting you down, somehow."

"...Tia, do you remember the last time you put me on a zip line?"

"Over by Vanhoover? How could I forget? Your face was green for hours."

"And ever since then, you haven't asked me to join you on your zip lines."

"Right, because you hate them. Where are you going with th- ohhhhhhhh."

You give her hooves a quick squeeze and you widen your smile.

"Thank you for trying, Tia. Just the fact that you're willing to try so hard for me means a lot."

"Hmhm. Of course, my sunshine."

Celestia leans forward, and the two of you share a quick, love-filled kiss.

You and Celestia might be different, but that doesn't mean you don't love each other. It's okay to not share the same interests, so long as the unshakable love you have for each other holds strong. Human or pony, extrovert or introvert, model-builder or zip liner... it doesn't matter. And as your wife heads off to bed for the evening, you take a moment to appreciate your model-building desk, now featuring a crudely made Custodes model proudly displayed for all to see.

Author's Note

Was this fic an excuse for me to gush about a hobby of mine while also writing more of my favorite pony? Maybe. Do I feel bad about it? Not even a little!

As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!