Fallout Equestria: The Ashlands Timeline

Date: Thursday 11/12/2287
POV: Maud Pie
Stable 5

The puppets made Maud want to smash them for their creepiness alone. They looked like pony marionettes without strings, moving with clicks and whirrs that betrayed their robotic nature. It did not help that they were festively dressed in bow ties and silly hats. Their black eyes with white pupils were the worst, and the very un-pony sharp teeth did not help.

But restraining herself as she watched them chop up this poor forgotten stallion was the hardest thing she had ever done. Perhaps they were angry about the door opening because the brutality they used exceeded any of his other corpses she’d seen.

‘Pinkie often has no issues with violence,’ commented Pinkie’s soul gem. ‘But this exceeds her tolerance. Yes.’

‘For sure,’ said Boulder. ‘I wish they’d let him diorite.’

Yet Maud did not turn away as she stood in her invisible corner. She felt like she owed it to Forgot for someone to see his noble sacrifice. The only other one with her was Crimson, who rode Maud's back so they wouldn’t become separated when they followed the bot. Maud backed up to the wall behind her to pin Crimson’s hips in place; the excited grinding got annoying. Crimson grumbled and pulled up her pipbuck, since she could use it in the upgraded stealth field.

The others had stationed themselves outside the entrance under an invisibility dome, remaining there in case they needed to open the door from the outside. It was good they couldn’t see this; most already looked ill from the stench of this place. By the time they finished, Forgot’s remains were spread from one end of the corridor to another.

‘They finally finished, Empress,’ Maud informed her.

‘Crimson, what did you find?’ Starlight asked over the PCB.

‘Maps on their network,’ Crimson sounded bored now that it was over. ‘And a terminal I could use to turn them off or change their mode to non-violent.’

‘Why would they program other modes into machines built for one purpose?’ asked Maud.

‘Stable-Tec over-complicated everything,’ said Crimson. ‘If you told them to make a fuel line de-icer, they’d end up giving it neuro-toxin capabilities. Anyway if they don’t have others, I can just shut them down.’

‘I wonder if we could figure out how to control them,’ Starlight wondered.

‘Everything is a method of conquest to you,’ Olivia commented. Maud kept forgetting she was on the PCB now, and likely so did Starlight.

‘We need everything we can get in our war to free Equestria,’ Crimson made an excuse for Starlight by reflex.

‘Maud and Crimson, proceed as planned,’ said Starlight. ‘Retrieve the life recycler and, if possible, Forgot’s new body.’

'We will retrieve both,' Maud assured.

‘Careful,’ Limestone’s soul gem said. ‘They will probably wake when you access the terminal.’

‘Limestone says they will wake when we access the terminal,’ Maud said over the PCB, knowing the others lacked the gift to hear her sisters.

‘Then Crimson will work quickly,’ said Starlight. ‘I’m sure she wants her wife to remain safe, and I can’t guarantee that if we have to hold them off.’

Maud wished she would stop with the threats. A grunt doing it was one thing, but royals resorting to it was distasteful. They should be better than tools like Maud.

This was why they needed Maud’s sisters back, so they had an alternative with a right to the throne. Starlight strangely didn’t realize this, almost as if she’d forgotten. Her mind was as slippery as her emotions, far more so than Maud remembered when they met before the Breaking. She’d wondered how much of the real Starlight was copied and how much was improvised by questionably-enchanted magitech.

With Forgot passed, the machines stopped cackling and strolled back down the corridor. One ripped the life gem from the back of Forgot’s neck, leaving his body there to rot like the others. Maud snuck after the mechanical menaces with Crimson atop her, stepping in time with the robots so they heard no hint of her walking.

‘Careful,’ Limestone’s gem said. ‘There will be some kind of special defense near the device.’

‘You can do it, Maud,’ encouraged Boulder. ‘You rock!’

‘The mystic rock should be careful over-using rock puns,’ said Pinkie. ‘The author can only think of so many. Yes.’

Stable 5 was well-kept aside from the cadavers littering it, and did not even seem smaller than the other stables. The brothers must have been off their noodles by the time they ordered this one built. Maud wondered if those constructing it even realized how it would be used.

‘I’m glad you’re here to carry me,’ said Crimson over the PCB. ‘My legs still hurt from your bone-breaking fetish.’

‘Next time I will break your neck,’ Maud said. 'Then none of your legs will hurt.'

‘Please keep flirting off the PCB,’ Starlight advised. ‘You’re on a mission, not a date.’

The one they followed led them to the door that Forgot described. The hoof plate that looked like the unlocking device was a red herring, though, as the creature simply knocked and waited for it to open. That was unexpectedly simple.

The noise of machinery behind the wall grew louder and the breath of fresh air from within was a relief. It beat the corpse party in the rest of the stable. Maud moved close to the creature and slipped through the door behind it.

The source of the noise was a tall balefire generator and the assembly line. There were several puppets ready to be finished, though Maud didn’t imagine Forgot ever killed many.

A screen readout displayed the words ‘Active: 205’. A graph below it showed the number increased as Forgot improved at avoiding them, starting at a mere five. He would never make it 60 days if they kept increasing. It was beyond an impossible task, but his skills at stealth must rival Maud’s by now.

A machine behind the assembly lines looked similar to a soul recycler, where the creature plugged Forgot’s life gem. After activating, it went through what Maud recognized as the body building sequence, starting with the skeletal structure. They needed that machine, but first had to shut this place down to make it out with it.

Above the machines was a catwalk that circled the room, a maneframe terminal on one side. Maud assumed that was where Crimson would need to be and moved towards the stairs leading up to the catwalk.

“Potential intruder detected,” said an cutesy robotic voice. “Scanning for murder-able objects in the immediate vicinity.”

Maud turned to see the speaker as she continued moving. It was another robot, but this one was different. It looked more advanced, with interwoven steel plates instead of disjointed gears. Most of it was white, but it had a pink and purple mane and tail. It would be cute if not for the lethality.

The green irises in its eyes scanned the room as its head turned. Maud assumed it was who opened the door and the closest thing to an overmare.

While she doubted it detected her, Maud took no chances and sped her movements. She kept her steps inconsistent so they would be hard to detect as hoof steps beneath the buzz of machinery.

“Switching to heat-signatures,” the Overbot said.

That was not ideal; if anything, her armor was hotter than her. She hurried to the base of the steps, but the catwalk would not be easy to walk on without sound.

“Intruder located,” the Overbot announced. “The fun begins immediately.”

Oh well. Maud could use some life-or-death combat to relax after the long trip there.

Maud turned and bucked Crimson off her back, sending her flying towards the top of the catwalk. Crimson landed with a grunt, and Maud bucked the stairs leading up to it. The metal groaned as it gave out and the stairs collapsed, leaving no easy way to the top so the Overbot would concentrate on her before Crimson.

Maud let the pulse barding’s stealth field fall and faced the creature. The Overbot faced her in return, assuming a wide-hooved stance and zeroing in.

“Oh, that’s nice!” Crimson staggered to her hooves. She galloped to the maneframe terminal. “You better not let it kill you, you cheating slut!”

Maud grumbled at Crimson then added to the PCB. ‘They have detected us. I am holding them off while Crimson works.’

Maud could not risk using Ashmaker with the balefire reactor and other dangerous or important things nearby. She had the AIE grenades they got from the raider base too, but those were out of the question since they could fry both the terminal and the life recycler, and she didn’t want to use Gigglers for similar reason if she could help it. She pulled Mite out instead and stood on her hind hooves to hold it with her front. She hoped it didn’t have any...

“Set phasers to hug!” the Overbot exclaimed as twin barrels unfolded from either flank.

Maud leaped to one side as jolts of energy rang through the room and charred the wall behind her. She took cover behind a steel beam, but couldn’t hide long lest it attack Crimson.

“That was not a hug,” Maud responded. “But if it is, I advise you not to hug in a room shared with a balefire reactor.”

“Targeting systems will not allow damage to the reactor or other valuable components,” the Overbot informed. So it would not fire on Crimson with her standing next to the maneframe, which was good.

‘Stand in front of the reactor,’ Limestone’s gem suggested. Maud was so glad to have Limestone’s advice even if its existence made little sense.

Maud feinted one way before moving the other as soon as its barrels trained on her predicted location. The blasts of energy missed again as Maud rushed to the reactor and took her stance in front.

“Unfairness detected!” the Overbot complained.

Who the buck programmed this thing?

The strategy worked and the robot charged her. It reared forward, front hooves splaying out as blades extended. Maud activated Mite’s rocket attachment, hitting a home run against its head and sending the whole robot flying across the room and over the assembly line. It quickly staggered to its hooves, merely dinged.

The puppet that brought in Forgot’s life gem joined the fray, charging her from another angle. That was easy enough as Maud slammed the hammer down on its head. Remembering the open door where more could enter, Maud kicked the rest of the smashed bot to slam against the door opening mechanism. The door slid shut just as several other puppets were rounding the corner, locking them out.

Maud leaped backward, landing atop the reactor, staggering but keeping her balance on the slanted edge. While the ones outside didn’t look like they could climb, the Overbot rushed the reactor and effortlessly scaled the side. Oh good, it had cybernetic sticky hooves for climbing.

‘Try not to damage the legs,’ Limestone suggested. ‘They might work for Kamikaze.’

“I will do my best,” Maud advised. Kami would definitely like the knife-hooves.

‘Maud! Crimson! We got company out here,’ Starlight’s voice came over the PCB. ‘They haven’t seen us yet, but we’ll have to engage them if they look like they might close the door.’

‘Tsk, such a cliché line to have ‘company’,’ complained Pinkie’s soul gem.

‘Why is it taking so long?’ Starlight asked.

‘I’m trying!’ Crimson replied. ‘I’m in but like I said everything is over-complicated. Finding my way through the menus is like finding a virgin whore in Las Pegasus.’

‘Get it done, both of you!’ Starlight said. ‘If they manage to close the door and we can’t stop them, there’s no guarantee we can open it again.’

The Overbot rushed Maud again. She backed up against the most vital looking components and swung for another home run. The thing adapted, ducking the swing and coming low instead. Maud leaped into the air in time to avoid dismemberment and landed back on the floor near the assembly line.

‘You have Pinkie’s explosives, do you not?’ Pinkie’s gem suggested. ‘You should use the giggler grenades! Pinkie wants to hear them cackle one last time. Yes.’

Maud had wanted to avoid them if possible, as using them in here had a very high chance of damaging something she didn’t want damaged, especially if the Overbot kicked it away. No matter how fun grenades were, it seemed like a bad idea, at least until Limestone agreed with it.

‘Albeit by accident, she has a point.’ Limestone added. ‘Pull the pin, so it would activate if you dropped it, but don’t.’

Maud would not stop following Limestone’s orders, even if unsure if it was her own subconscious. She pulled out a giggler, activating it and holding it against one outstretched hoof.

The Overbot charged off the reactor towards Maud, but skidded to a halt and returned to a battle stance, not wanting to risk damage to the assembly line. This eliminated its options for attacking her, so they played a staring contest, the Overbot processing how to kill Maud while Maud pondered how to dispose of the grenade without losing her advantage. The Overbot stood near enough the reactor that Maud would not attack it with the grenade either.

“Deactivate the explosive device and surrender your life, you meanie mean pants,” the Overbot demanded.

Finally the Overbot decided to do what Maud hoped it would not. It turned and climbed the wall to the catwalk.

“Almost there,” Crimson said as if not seeing what came for her.

“You have incoming, Crimson!” Maud called.

Maud turned, slamming a hoof against the door controls to open it again. She tossed the grenade into the puppets standing outside before closing it again. As an explosion rang out from outside and the frame of the door shuddered, Maud galloped to leap to the opposite end of the catwalk from the Overbot.

“I’m typing it!” Crimson called out as she watched the Overbot charge her out of one corner of her eye.

‘It is about time we had a scene where we barely have enough time to do something,’ Pinkie’s gem said. ‘Yes.’

Maud galloped and leaped over Crimson’s head, landing her hind hooves on the Overbot’s head seconds before it could make contact with Crimson. She brought her hammer down against its front, breaking the extended blades. Kamikaze would have to hope those could be fixed.

That did not stop it though. It rolled, sliding out from beneath her and grabbing hold of one of Crimson’s legs. It bent it back at the knee until it snapped.

“I bucking hate déjà vu!” Crimson squealed as she collapsed, continuing to type with her magic.

Maud slammed her hooves into the bot again, knocking it back to the floor, but it immediately climbed again. Maud gritted her teeth, glancing at the life recycler once more to make sure it was okay.

Wait. Where did Forgot go?

Maud found Forgot just in time to see him twist a power cable from the assembly line with his magic. The mad little stallion did not realize that it was not so easy to bring back Maud and Crimson if he killed them in the process of stopping the Overbot.

As the bot landed back atop the catwalk, Forgot tossed the cable up to the metal. Maud grabbed hold of Crimson and tossed her off. The sound of Crimson landing on the floor included a sickening bone crunch, but it beat the alternative as the cable touched the catwalk.

As the energy surged through the catwalk, the pulse armor absorbed enough to prevent serious damage. The Overbot had no such luck. Sparks flew and smoke belched as it screamed out random robotic noises and collapsed, hitting the floor with a dull thud.

“Buck you too!” Crimson cried out. “So desperate to get in a leg snap before I die? Bucking hurts...”

Crimson did not bother pretending to like pain when alone with Maud. Fairly alone at least, but Crimson did not see Forgot yet.

“Did we win?” Forgot asked.

“Oh, hay there,” Crimson turned to see him as she rolled over onto her back, then looked to Maud. “The ones outside are in butler mode, and good luck taking them out of it since the maneframe terminal fried.”

Maud landed on the floor near Crimson and wheezed, the violence having made her somewhat hot and bothered. She growled and looked at Crimson, eyes locking onto her.

“Am I about to die?” Crimson chuckled. “Or just get bucked?”

“You are about to do both if you fail to get me off quickly enough,” growled Maud.

Maud tackled Crimson onto her back and began to shed her own armor.

“Uh, what are you doing?” Forgot whimpered. “Did I cause a fight? I’m sorry…” The poor stallion had forgotten what sex was, and certainly what lesbians were.

‘She’s getting her rocks off!’ said Boulder, not that Forgot could hear his awful puns; that was Maud's curse.

POV: Twilight Sparkle

It had been somewhat random to find an old magic school friend inside the stable, though she wasn’t sure if they met in this timeline. With him lacking memory, it didn’t matter, but she still felt terrible for sending him to die.

Now, Twilight stood with the others in the tunnel outside the stable door, ready to hold the door if needed. They stayed under Starlight’s invisibility dome, which gave them more room than the stealth field. They could see one another inside the dome, but couldn’t move outside without being seen.

Everyone had stayed, though Tranquil and Mercury were near the back. Gloomy, of course, remained next to Twilight. Starlight stood at the front of the group, Olivia next to her with her grimoire against her chest. Twilight wondered how powerful her magic was, but hadn’t seen her face anything powerful enough to test it, and she couldn’t exactly ask what her power level was.

As the dog stood there, Twilight noticed she regularly glanced at Mercury. Twilight wondered if Olivia suspected Mercury knew something about Kyo, and Twilight considered telling her, except that she promised Mercury she wouldn’t. Maybe she could convince Mercury to allow it.

“You sure you’re alright?” Gloomy asked her in a whisper, yet again. “Sorry I didn’t notice that when it happened.”

“Very, and now is not the time, there’s bigger daisies to munch than Crimson being...Crimson,” Twilight replied. She hated to brush it off like a childish prank, but dwelling on it didn’t really help. Besides that, in a weird way it showed how much more Crimson respected her that she’d even go for it.

‘They have detected us. I am holding them off while Crimson works.’ Maud said over the PCB.

Twilight didn’t respond lest she chance distracting Maud during combat, as did the others. She looked to Starlight to see what she would say.

“We’ll hold unless it looks like the bots can move the obstruction from the door,” Starlight said aloud.

There were a few already clanging into the atrium to look at the door and more would doubtless follow when they saw the large steel beam Starlight obstructed it with.

‘Should we call for the dog guards further out?’ asked Gloomy over the PCB when they got closer.

‘I’m sure Crimson won’t take too long,’ said Starlight. ‘Let’s not owe them one if we don’t have to.’

‘You do realize that I am one of ‘them’, yes?’ Olivia commented.

‘I meant no offense,’ Starlight jerked slightly. ‘I just don’t want to tax our relationship so soon by asking for a lot of help.’

Starlight had a lot of confidence in her friends, which was good, though maybe she saw them as minions. She might also just be cocky due to her luck so far; unfortunately, Starlight's wickedness seemed directly proportional to her confidence.

‘This is a big problem,’ Mercury sighed as she stepped up to the rest. ‘There are a lot coming in there, maybe near a hundred.’

‘We could really use Pinkie’s chaingun about now,’ sighed Starlight.

‘Stand steady,’ Olivia said, stepping past Starlight to the edge of the dome and opening her grimoire. It automagically flipped open to the spell she wanted as she stretched out the opposite palm to face the stable door. ‘If they make progress, I will destroy them.’

‘Destroy them?’ Starlight sounded incredulous.

Twilight had to admit she was as well, perhaps a bit of shameful dog stereotypes remained.

‘Any reason you’re waiting?’ asked Starlight, sounding irritated, possibly offended Olivia had stood in front of her.

‘Because the more that are in the atrium,’ said Olivia, the runes glowing on her grimoire. ‘The more that I can destroy in a single blast. I’m being efficient.’

“Right,” Starlight said, seeming to dismiss the claim and charging up her own horn.

‘Save your magic,’ Olivia informed her. ‘It is unnecessary.’

Olivia glanced at Starlight with the very beginnings of a smirk. Perhaps she wanted to show Starlight what she was capable of as intimidation, especially if she had suspicions, but it seemed unlikely she could take out a room full with a single spell.

When over a dozen of the creatures were tugging on the beam at once, it began to shift, and that was what Olivia seemed to have been waiting on. She released the spell she’d been charging.

A funnel of magic shot from her outstretched palm, incandescent energy blasting through the corridor and into the atrium like a wind tunnel of death. Sparks and metal flew as a blender of magical blades shredded the puppets into pieces, raining to the floor in chunks.

The blast funneled through the large room beyond like a whirlwind, and when the magical energy dissipated, every robot in the atrium was raining spare parts clattering onto the floor. Twilight’s muzzle fell open. Not only was it an extreme amount of energy, but it was perfectly controlled, barely touching anything in the room that wasn’t a target. Not even Twilight at her most powerful could have matched the precision.

Olivia’s magic seemed to channel through the book on its way into her hand and out into force, making Twilight want to look in Olivia’s book more than ever. She doubted she’d allow it.

The spell nullified the invisibility Starlight had cast, and Starlight prepared to fire her own spell, only to pause and look at Olivia with wide eyes. As more puppets flooded into the room again, Olivia raised her palm again, waiting for them to get closer. The creatures didn’t seem bright enough to know the danger they were in even as they waded through the last batch, so maybe a surprise attack getting most of them wasn’t even needed.

“You… can actually do that more than once?” Starlight stared, while everyone else, including Twilight, were speechless.

But before there was a need for a second blast, everything stopped. The puppets skidded to a halt, a few tumbling flat on their faces from the momentum. They remained still for a moment before walking back towards the interior of the stable as if nothing had occurred.

“Did she do it?” Tranquil stammered.

‘Maud, Crimson?’ Starlight asked over the PCB. No answer.

“We have to get to them,” said Twilight. “Even if they succeeded, they could be hurt.

Starlight projected her map in front of her. She eyed Olivia one more time, then cantered back into the stable. Mercury was next to her, while Twilight, Gloomy, and Tranquil followed them.

Olivia, on the other hoof, turned and walked out of the tunnel leading into the stable, likely to speak to the dogs outside. Perhaps she wanted to send a message about their progress.

The others didn’t speak to one another as they hurried through the corridors. They passed animatronics that would have tried to kill them earlier, but the creatures appeared docile. They were cleaning up the corpses and carrying them off for disposal.

As they approached their destination, they found Forgot standing outside the open door amongst the remains of exploded puppets.

“Ah, hello,” Forgot stammered, shivering as if not being in danger freaked him out more than what he was used to.

“Is everypony okay?” Twilight asked as Starlight moved ahead through the door. She moved to Forgot instead, smiling in an effort to calm him.

“Um, yes and no?” Forgot shrugged. “I don’t know. They’re being weird at each other. I felt uncomfortable and left.” His voice got lower. “I think they might be hurt, they don’t have… thingies between their hind legs.”

“I’m sure they’re fine,” Twilight assured awkwardly. The poor thing forgot there was more than one gender too it seemed, and hadn’t noticed until now, which meant they’d taken off their armor, which meant...

“Maud, no!” Starlight screamed after entering. “I told you not to kill ponies without my command!”

Yep. Any affection between those two could definitely be mistaken for attempted murder.

Twilight followed inside in time to see Starlight pull Maud off of Crimson with her magic. Crimson was on her back, overcome with violent twitching as Mercury rushed to her, one of her legs broken at the knee.

“I was not killing her,” Maud claimed, both calm and breathless. “I believe the correct term is ‘hate sex’. Also I am not the one that broke her leg this time. The Overbot did it for me.”

Mercury looked over Crimson, pulling bandages from her saddle bags and wrapped the broken leg as she moved a potion to Crimson’s lips. Tranquil leaned down with her, assisting with the bandaging as much as she could and looking worried.

Crimson was bruised as if having been pummeled, but if Maud had actually tried to kill her, she’d be in pieces.

“If you really want to make me feel better, you could do one of your dances,” Crimson grinned to Tranquil.

“Ah, um,” Tranquil blushed and shook her rear slightly while continuing to work. “That’s all I can do right now, I’ve gotten a bit rusty.”

“Hmph,” Crimson seemed disappointed, but looked over to the others instead. “I saved the day I guess? I better find someone innocent to kill soon to make sure my alignment doesn't shift. Where’d that Forgot guy get to? Someone needs to give that guy emergency sex ed; I’d advise emergency gender reassignment too while he’s still gullible.”

Twilight looked around for him as well. Maud and Starlight examined the life recycler with Forgot now looking on in fascination but seeming afraid to get too close. He'd probably never seen the instrument of his eternal torment.

“It's an early model all right, no wonder he’s got memory issues,” Starlight said. “We can't even use it with your gems, but some components are the same. Can you still carry it to the wagon?”

“Always,” Maud nodded. “We must get this to Solar.”

Starlight nodded and looked thoughtful.

“It's fine, Oliver,” Twilight placed a hoof on Forgot's shoulder when she noticed him staring into space. “You're free and safe now.”

“I-I'm free?” Forgot jumped at the touch and looked confused. “N-no… they’ll find me… I should die forever just to be safe…”

“You need to get that out of your head,” Gloomy said. “You never know when your life might suddenly change for the better”

“Oliver,” sighed Twilight. “Please, life is worth holding onto. I know we only just met, but I care about you, and so do… some of the others. I’m sure more will in Holder, the safe haven we’re based in. Please…”

As she smiled gently at Forgot, she noticed a flicker of light. Once again, she saw rainbows reflect across a pony’s eyes. Forgot didn’t react as Crimson had, simply staring as if momentarily catatonic from confusion.

It happened again?

“Oliver?” Twilight asked slowly.

“Yes,” he nodded. “You’re right… I want to get to know more ponies like you. I want to heal others, like you healed me, and that means… hanging on to life, I guess like you said.”

“Good,” Twilight smiled. “Um… wow this is going to be even harder to explain to you.”

She turned, opening up her saddlebag and a smaller sack of things inside it.

“This stuff again?” Gloomy shook his head and smirked. “You actually brought a bag of random gifts in case you needed them?”

“Well, it turns out I did need one, didn’t it?” Twilight smiled back at him.

Twilight tugged out a beaded necklace, slipping it around the confused stallion’s neck. Sure enough, it shimmered again with a rainbow glimmer. It puzzled her though, because like with Crimson, she wasn’t sure what Element he was. His lesson seemed to be about love and life, but that didn’t match any Element she knew. It was the same with Crimson. Was her’s Mercy? Justice? It hadn’t occurred to her previously that the Elements might change with each iteration, perhaps based on what the world needed.

“I got this from a zebra merchant in Holder, where you’ll be going,” Twilight told him. “She told me the green beads represent life, and the white ones healing. It can remind you of your lesson.”

“I-I’ll keep it forever,” Oliver teared up as he reached a hoof up to feel it.

“Good,” smiled Twilight. “I’ll… explain more about it once you’ve had some time to settle in, but do keep it safe.”

“Is everything okay here?” Olivia asked as she entered, having found her way following the signals.

“It seems so, Olivia,” smiled Twilight.

“If you no longer wish me to put you down,” said Maud as she turned to Oliver. “We can escort you to Holder as we return the recycler there for study.”

“We can't escort him back now ourselves,” Starlight shook her head. “Olivia, now that they have no need to guard the entrance, can the soldiers outside escort Forgot to Holder? It’s important that we not be delayed.”

“The Over-bot too,” Maud said, motioning to the more advanced looking robot crumpled on the floor nearby. “Its legs are repairable and could work better for Kamikaze.”

“I am sure they would be happy to,” nodded Olivia. ‘Though, if Holder is not to your liking, or you’re not comfortable near another stable, you’re welcome to live in my home city Ramble. We have a number of ponies living there happily already.”

“T-thank you,” Forgot nodded, then blinked as his eyes went lower on the dog. “You don’t have one either…”

“One what?” Olivia tilted her head.

“A-am I the only one with one?” Oliver’s eyes widened. “Am I deformed?”

“Oh goodness,” Twilight face-hoofed with a heavy blush. “No, Olivier… look… I’ll explain that a bit before you head to Holder.”

Oliver nodded, putting a front hoof on his new necklace and playing with it.

“You sure I shouldn’t explain it to him?” asked Crimson. “I can do the opposite of my favorite spell on him and..”

“Crimson…” Twilight peered at her. “Please do not speak to him about anything, until I’ve explained. And if you try to illustrate using my body like earlier, I swear to Celestia my horn stub is going up your butt so hard that bits of you will rain down on fire.”

Twilight could barely believe her own words, but she meant them. It scared her a little that the tendency to threaten friends with murder might be rubbing off on her.

“Whoa, mascot finally got kinky!” replied Crimson with a chuckle and a slap to Twilight’s ass, making her sigh. She should’ve seen that one coming, realizing too late that Crimson would take it for a flirt.

“D-did I cause another fight?” Oliver sounded ready to tear up.

“Crimson attracts fights on her own,” Maud said. “She is allergic to peace and quiet.”

“Allergic?” asked Olvier.

“She breaks out in terrible rashes,” claimed Maud, too dead-pan for the joke to be obvious. “That is why I was hitting her earlier. To protect her.”

“Maud, please,” Twilight sighed. While she was sure Maud was only being playful...

“Really?” Oliver looked at Crimson as if pitying her. He also forced himself to speak louder, as if thinking it would help her ‘allergy’ to quiet. “I’m sorry to hear that! I hope things go better for you, but I don’t think I can hit you… I’m really sorry!”

“You know what?” Crimson smirked. “You’re right, Not-Midnight. I can’t do it, he’s actually too innocent for me to want to corrupt. Whoever thought we’d see this day?”

“Twilight, explain sex to him before he breaks,” Starlight sighed. “And why it should only be done when ponies have time and a damn room.”

“Maybe warn him about Solar, too,” Mercury helpfully suggested. “For when he gets to Holder.”

“Maybe advise the PUB instead, if he wants to try,” Olivia suggested, adding to the already weird conversation. “They would be gentle and I can send a letter requesting he receive a free service of his choice.”

Twilight blushed...this was going to take a while to go over, and she didn’t have her best sex ed books on her, so she’d have to say it all herself.

“Right,” Starlight rolled her eyes. “Then we’ll send him on his way with Olivia’s guards and head to Ramble ourselves. I'd like to speak with their leader before we sleep, if possible.”

“Chief Fluffy, that is,” Olivia said. “He will be most interested to speak to you I am sure.”