It Can't Be Taught

Chapters

Ms. Cheerilee
The Human
Parent-Teacher Conference
At Their Worst
A Drinking Game
Bending the Rules
Spoiled
The Grand Galloping Gala
What I've Learned
Dancing in the Dark
It Can't Be Taught
World Experience

Ms. Cheerilee

Author's Note

This story takes place sometime during the second season of Friendship is Magic.

As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!

Ms. Cheerilee

A yawn escapes from a purple-pink mare as she crawls out of bed, her eyes still half-lidded in response to the sunlight pouring through her window. She stretches a bit as her hooves hit the creaky wooden floor, a painful-sounding snap coming from her back as she does so. She slowly makes her way across the room, each hoofstep echoing through the mostly empty house. A slight groan can be heard as she enters the bathroom across the hall before lazily brushing her messy mane out of her face. Right now, she feels exhausted and downright miserable.

This is a normal morning for Ms. Cheerilee, Ponyville's resident elementary school teacher. She's known for always greeting everypony with a smile, and she is a well-respected member of the community. However, as far as she's concerned, that's only because nopony can see her when she's like this. It takes a lot of effort to always be presentable and "in a good mood," but if she wants to be a role model for Ponyville's colts and fillies, she's gotta do what she's gotta do.

She yawns again as she exits the bathroom and makes her way to the kitchen, immediately getting to work on brewing a fresh pot of coffee. Without the sweet nectar known as caffeine, there is little doubt that she wouldn't make it through a school day. As the water heats up, she trots out of the kitchen and into the connected dining room. She starts to reach for her bag, but as she does so, she notices some mail being pushed through the slot in her door. With a sigh, she bends over to pick it all up. Let's see... bill, bill, junk, bill, junk, the morning paper, bill, junk. Great.

Still not entirely awake, Cheerilee tosses the junk into a nearby trash can (which appears to have not been emptied in weeks) before setting the bills down on her table, adding them to an ever-growing pile. With that out of the way, she reaches for her bag yet again, double-checking that she has everything she needs for the day. As far as she can tell she's good to go, and with a familiar-sounding ding coming from the kitchen, a smile finally makes its way to her face.

Cheerilee pours herself a cup and sits down at the table after deciding to skip breakfast today. Taking a sip of her coffee, she uses her free hoof to grab the paper. The "Equestria Daily" never misses a beat, even if there hasn't been much news lately. Her eyes calmly skim over the massive headline, which reads "Aliens in Ponyville: Fact or Fiction?!" Cheerilee scoffs as she reads the sensational article.

They're not technically wrong. An alien did, in fact, arrive in Ponyville a few days ago. Nopony knows how it got there, not even the alien itself. However, it does appear to speak the same language as them, and as far as they can tell, it bears them no ill-will. The town's librarian, Twilight Sparkle, took on the responsibility of taking care of it and learning about it. If she weren't Princess Celestia's student and one of the mares responsible for saving Equestria a couple of times over now, Cheerilee imagines there would have been a bit more kickback surrounding her decision to do so. For her part, though, Cheerilee doesn't really care either way.

Heck, she doesn't have time to care. No matter what anypony says, teaching is an extremely strenuous and time-consuming job. If she worried about every little thing that Twilight and her friends got up to, she'd never get anything done.

Speaking of, it's about time that she got going.

"And that, students, is how magical researchers and inventors came together to create the practice we know today as enchanting, which is vital to many of our modern technologies!"

Cheerilee, now looking as picture-perfect as ever, looks out over her class. She continues to smile a warm smile at her students, even as she realizes that none of them are paying attention. Most students, like Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara, are clearly looking in another direction or doodling in their notebooks. Some, like Scootaloo, are asleep at their desks. The most attentive student is Twist, and even she has eyes that appear to be glazed over.

"Are there any questions?" Cheerilee scans the classroom. Either none of the students even registered that she asked a question, or none of them care to answer. Her smile wavering ever-so-slightly, she calls out to the sleeping Scootaloo. "Scootaloo!"

"Huh?!"

Scootaloo shoots awake, the fear in her eyes prompting a few nearby students to giggle.

"Were you listening?"

"Er... o-of course I was, Ms. Cheerilee! It's just... e-everypony knows all of that stuff already, hehe!"

"Oh? Then I suppose you'll pass today's pop quiz with flying colors!"

The class collectively groans as Cheerilee produces a stack of papers from behind her desk. She promptly passes them around and asks the students to get going. They do so, each and every one now awake and anxiously filling in the blanks. Cheerilee withholds a sigh and glances out a nearby window. The Ponyville schoolhouse isn't very big. It's well-maintained, sure, but there isn't a whole lot of space. Thankfully there's plenty of room outside for the children to play, but even the playground equipment is old and falling apart. For how much the school board loves to breathe down her neck, they sure don't do a whole lot to actually help the school's funding... nor her paycheck.

After ten minutes pass, the bell begins to ring, signalling the start of recess.

"Leave your quizzes on your desks, they will be graded when you come back in!"

Without any hesitation or even a sound of acknowledgement, the students all race out of the building, eager to be anywhere but in class. Finally alone, Cheerilee lets out that sigh she had been holding in. She slowly forces herself to walk from the front of the room towards the students' desks, methodically picking up each and every quiz and sorting them in alphabetical order. This would likely be time consuming if it weren't for how much practice she gets doing it every single day.

It only takes her about five minutes to grade the quizzes. As she suspected, even her top-performing students like Silver Spoon and Twist did poorly. She rubs her temple in frustration, making sure to smooth out her coat afterwards so as to not make it obvious that she was upset. This poor performance has been a trend over the last few months. In fact, everything has just been on a bit of a downward spiral. The students don't have the excitement for learning that they used to, and their attentiveness and grades are both hurting because of it. Meanwhile, this is causing Cheerilee to lose passion for her job that she has loved for so many years. That, combined with her nonstop exhaustion as of late, has made the Ponyville Schoolhouse a place where nopony is happy.

Cheerilee looks through the window yet again, carefully watching the students as they enjoy the fair weather. This is the time of day when the students are at their happiest. Smiling students are why she does this job, after all. And yet, even recess isn't a true escape from her growing worries.

On the far side of the playground, she can see Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon circling Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo. Although she is too far away to hear what they are saying, it's clear that they're teasing the three. Cheerilee isn't stupid, nor is she ignorant to the plights of her students. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are bullies, through and through. For a brief moment, Cheerilee considers marching outside and putting a stop to all of it. However, she can barely take one shaky step before she stops herself. With a deep breath and a heavy heart, she sits back down at her desk, hoping that recess passes quickly for those poor fillies.

If it wasn't for that stuck-up little so-and-so from the school board, Spoiled Rich, she wouldn't think twice about putting Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon in their place. However, as it stands, her hooves are tied. She can't deny a direct order from the school board lest she lose her job, and with Spoiled Rich being Diamond Tiara's mother (and more than willing to use a threat or two to get what she wants), Cheerilee finds herself stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Thankfully for her, the bell finally rings. She quickly calls the students back inside, knowing full well that those two fillies wouldn't dare continue their bullying in front of her. Not even Spoiled Rich could defend her daughter being a bully in the middle of class.

Now, if only she could get these students to pay attention.

Snips and Snails finally exit the schoolhouse and close the door behind them, leaving Cheerilee alone once again at the end of the school day. The sun will begin setting soon, and it's about time for her to head home as well. She takes a deep breath and attempts to collect her thoughts before reaching for her bag.

One more day down.

However, as Cheerilee opens the door to exit her place of work, she jumps at the unexpected sight that greets her. On the other side of the door is none other than Twilight Sparkle, the unicorn librarian from the Golden Oak Library. Her hoof is lifted in the air as though she was just about to knock on the door when Cheerilee opened it, and they both look at each other with wide eyes.

"O-oh! Good afternoon, Twilight."

"Good afternoon, Ms. Cheerilee. Erm, am I interrupting something?"

"Not at all, I was just about to head home for the day. What can I help you with?"

"Well... oh, how do I put this?" Cheerilee tilts her head as Twilight brings a hoof to her chin, carefully considering her words before she tries to speak again. "Are you aware of the creature that appeared in town the other day?"

Cheerilee opens her mouth to speak, but briefly hesitates. That was not what she was expecting to hear.

"Y-yes, I suppose so. I only know what I've read in the papers, though."

"Well, the long and short of it is, his name is Anon. He is a creature called a 'human,' and we have no idea how he got here."

"Okay, I'm following so far."

"I got Princess Celestia and Princess Luna to help me, but we still can't figure out where he came from or how to send him back. We're loath to admit it, but right now, it looks like there's nothing we can do for him."

"That's terrible!"

"I know. Thankfully, he's a really nice guy. He's just a bit... well, confused. Our ways of doing things are completely foreign to him, after all."

"Um, Twilight?"

"Yes?"

"Not that I don't sympathize, but what does this have to do with me?"

"Well, about that..." Twilight fiddles for a moment, rubbing her right hoof over her left leg as she breaks eye contact with Cheerilee. "Princess Celestia advised me to find somepony who might be... you know... willing to act as his mentor?"

"Mentor? Like, you want me to take him on as a student?"

"Not exactly." Twilight takes a deep breath before looking at Cheerilee again, the anxiety clear on her face. "Anon is an adult, after all. It would be strange to put him in a classroom full of children. Still, he doesn't even know some of the basic fundamentals of Equestria, like the differences between the ponykinds or how the country was founded. It's going to be hard for him to become self-sufficient if he doesn't get a firm grasp on how things work around here. So, we were hoping you might be able to act as a sort of guide for him after school hours end. You know, give him a lesson or two, show him around, that sort of thing?"

"I'm... flattered that you would consider me for this, but why me specifically?"

"You're the only teacher in Ponyville. On top of that, you're a darn good one. It might be simple, but I think that's a sound enough reason to make you a prime candidate for this. I'd do it myself, but I have a tendency to... er... get lost in the weeds, as it were."

"Hm."

Cheerilee thinks to herself for a moment. The agreeable mare in her that's passionate about teaching wants her to say yes. She knows that it's probably the right thing to do, but lately, she's had her hooves full on a normal schedule. How could she hope to do what she's already doing and act as some alien's mentor figure?!

"Did I mention that Princess Celestia offered financial compensation?" Cheerilee's ears immediately perk up. "We know it wouldn't exactly be the easiest task in the world, so we thought-"

"I'll do it."

"H-huh?"

"I said I'll do it. I'd be happy to help. Plus, I'm sure it'll be interesting trying to teach an alien, hmhm!"

"Oh. Oh! Yes, right! Good! I'm glad to hear that!" Twilight looks extremely relieved, and Cheerilee realizes that Twilight didn't have a backup plan had she said no. "I can bring him here after school ends tomorrow, if that's okay with you."

"Sure, Twilight." Cheerilee nods and gives the unicorn a smile. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Great!" Twilight vigorously shakes Cheerilee's hoof before turning around. "I need to get back to the library, we're still sorting out his living situation. I'll see you tomorrow!"

"Goodbye, Twilight!"

Cheerilee waves as Twilight begins to trot away. Once she is out of earshot, a deep sigh escapes the tired teacher. She really, really doesn't want to teach some alien guy during her off hours, but she also desperately needs the money. After double-checking that her saddlebag is secured to her body, she slowly makes her way back home, dreading what the next day might bring.

The Human

"Goodbye, everypony! And remember to have your reports finished by Monday!"

Cheerilee calls out to her students as they flood out of the door to the schoolhouse, each and every one excited to go home for the weekend. Despite her irritable mood, the tired teacher just smiles and waves as the last few students exit the room. However, shortly after the final student closes the door, she hears a few shrieks coming from just outside. Suddenly at full attention, she jumps to her hooves and throws the door open, ready and willing to do whatever she needs to do to keep those children safe.

What she sees doesn't exactly catch her off guard, but it is a relief. The children are perfectly safe. The shrieks were apparently made out of excitement, as she sees about seven students crowding around two figures. The first figure is Twilight Sparkle, though the students seem to be ignoring her. Instead, their attention is focused entirely on the creature standing next to her. One look is all it takes for Cheerilee to identify the creature as the alien that she is supposed to be mentoring. There was a picture of him in the paper a few days ago, but she didn't expect him to be so tall.

Easily over six feet tall, the creature is a bit hard to ignore. He has no coat, nor does he have a tail. However, he does have a head covered in dark, messy hair. On top of that, he appears to be growing a bit of a beard, though whether that is by choice or due to not having a chance to shave since arriving in Equestria is up in the air. His features appear somewhat hardened, but the most notable part of his face is the way his eyes take everything in. They seem sharp, and for all intents and purposes, they are the eyes of a creature carefully considering everything he sees and hears. All in all, if she were to go off of looks alone, Cheerilee would describe him as rough and imposing.

His clothes, however, don't quite match that description. He appears to be wearing a very nice suit and tie. The craftsmanship on said suit is immaculate, and it looks as though it was made to compliment his features perfectly. Cheerilee isn't exactly a fashion expert, but even she can tell that this alien's suit was carefully crafted by Rarity, Ponyville's premier fashion designer.

The human has a smile on his face as he kneels down to greet the children. Admittedly, this puts Cheerilee on edge at first, but she breathes a sigh of relief as she sees him start to answer their questions with laughter in his voice. Between that and Twilight's apparent lack of worry, she figures that it's probably okay. As she comes to that conclusion, Twilight looks up from the small crowd and notices Cheerilee in the doorway, giving her a happy wave after she does so.

"Alright everypony, we have some important stuff we need to do. Be safe getting home, okay?"

Cheerilee smirks to herself. Twilight might say otherwise, but she's a natural at teaching. The children listen to her without arguing, and a few moments later, the crowd has dispersed. Twilight and her companion glance at each other before finally approaching the school house. Twilight happily trots up to Cheerilee, but the teacher's attention is directed towards the new guy in town. She watches him lag behind a little bit, a noticeable hesitation in his slow gait. He stares at the schoolhouse with a scowl on his face, but his expression softens as he catches up to the two mares.

"Good afternoon, Ms. Cheerilee! This," Twilight says as she motions towards her companion, "is Anon. As I stated yesterday, he's a human from... somewhere far away, it seems."

"Nice to meet you, Ms. Cheerilee."

The human kneels down a bit and holds out a hand towards his new mentor, a gentle smile on his face that doesn't quite reach his eyes. With the slightest bit of hesitation, Cheerilee shakes his hand. For a moment, she starts to think to herself. Why is she hesitating? He's shown that he's quite polite, and he can be good with kids, too. What reason does she have to distrust this "human?"

"It's nice to make your acquaintance as well, Mr. Anon. I've been told that I am to be your mentor starting today?"

"That's what Twilight told me."

Anon stops kneeling down, and Cheerilee can't help but notice how imposing his presence is when he is standing straight up. She has to crane her neck quite a bit to look him in his piercing eyes.

"Anon, Ms. Cheerilee is an incredible teacher. You'd do well to listen to her!"

"Thank you for the opportunity to learn." Anon glances between Twilight and Cheerilee. "Both of you."

"Oh, it's really no big deal," Cheerilee says with a forced smile. "I'm always happy to help others learn, no matter who they are!"

"Thanks again for this, Ms. Cheerilee. I really owe you one!" Twilight turns back to Anon with a smile on her face. "I'm going to get back to looking into that lead I found. You know the way back to the library, right?"

"I do."

"Great. I'll see you tonight." With a smile and wave, Twilight begins to trot away. "Goodbye, Ms. Cheerilee!"

"Bye, Twilight!" Once Twilight is sufficiently far away, Cheerilee turns back to Anon, still forcing a smile as she does so. "Please, come in!"

"Hm."

Anon's only response is a slight grunt as he slinks into the schoolhouse. Is it just Cheerilee, or did his demeanor suddenly shift? She closes the door behind them as they enter the one-room schoolhouse. Anon stops in place and takes a moment to look around. The look on his face isn't pleasant.

"Well, feel free to take a seat wherever you like!" Anon glances down at the desks, which barely even reach up to his knees, before looking back at Cheerilee with an unimpressed, somewhat angry expression. "Ah. R-right. Hold on, I think I have a larger chair in the corner over here..."

Before Cheerilee can even begin to make her way towards said chair, Anon has already reached it, grabbed it, and sat down in it, being sure to place it mere feet away from Cheerilee's desk. He looks at her with disdain, and when he speaks, his voice is much more gruff than it was mere moments ago.

"Is this the part where you teach me whatever dumb kiddie shit Twilight told you to cover?"

"I... excuse me?!"

Cheerilee is appalled. Not only is this a complete 180 from how he was just acting, but in all of her years of teaching, she has never been spoken to like that! Not even the rowdiest of students would dare!

"Let me make something clear for you right now." Anon leans forward, his sharp eyes staring daggers into her. "I don't want to be in Equestria. I don't want to learn how Equestria does things. I don't want to be stuck in some little red schoolhouse with a horse that plans to treat me like a baby." Without taking his eyes off of her, Anon reaches into his back pocket and produces a small notebook and a worn-out pencil. "So why don't we get this over with as soon as possible, hm?"

A million thoughts shoot through Cheerilee's mind at once. She feels her eye twitch as she desperately tries to hold on to her last nerve.

So, even after everything she has gone through, not even the alien wants to be here, huh?

She returns Anon's determined stare with an exhausted, dead-inside stare of her own. She reminds herself that she desperately wants... no, needs the money. It's true that this isn't going to be fun. It's true that this is going to take up most of what little free time she had left, and it's true that she really wishes she were anywhere but here right now. And yet... she doesn't really have much of a choice. Just like every other day of her life.

Letting out a sigh, she finally responds to the errant human.

"Just watch the profanity."

"You're not my mom."

"But I am your teacher. And I will be reporting your progress to Twilight."

She was taking a shot in the dark when she said that, but it seems like she hit her target regardless. It's slight, but Anon's determined stare wavers ever-so-slightly when Twilight is mentioned, piquing her curiosity. What kind of influence does Twilight have on Anon, and why?

"...Fine. Just start teaching already."

Cheerilee holds the stare for a moment more before turning away from Anon and beginning to write on the board behind her.

"I'm assuming we don't need to cover reading or writing?"

"Nope, they're the same where I'm from."

"Good, then we're going to start with the most basic of basics concerning how Equestria works by discussing the three ponykinds, starting with earth ponies."

Cheerilee draws a crude outline of an earth pony and begins to describe their role in Equestria. They have physically sturdy bodies and often find themselves caring for the land more than their flying or magical kin. When she finishes describing how earth ponies function, she turns back to face Anon, who appears to be looking in a random direction with a bored expression on his face.

Of course he is.

"Are you paying attention?"

"Eeyup. Earth ponies are farmers, or whatever."

"...Fine."

Choosing to swallow her pride, she continues her lecture. As she speaks, she notices that Anon seems to be losing interest more and more. He never quite falls asleep, but it's very clear that he is bored out of his mind and not paying attention whatsoever. For a moment, she considers exploding on him. After all, if he's an adult, he should be able to take it, right? She doesn't have to hold back on him, right?

...No. No, that's not who she is. No matter how angry she gets, or how much this job frustrates her, Cheerilee will always try to be the best teacher she can be. She will do her utmost to help every student, no matter who they are.

Doing her best to keep her composure, she finishes discussing the ponykinds and transitions into the tale of the first Hearth's Warming, emphasizing the importance of unity between the ponykinds and how the traits that make them unique allow Equestria to thrive. Finally done speaking, she turns to look at Anon once again, who is resting his head in his hands and yawning.

"Did you get all of that?"

"Mmhmm." His voice is unenthusiastic, and he sounds barely conscious.

Cheerilee glances out of a nearby window. The sun has set, and the moon is beginning to rise into the sky.

"Well, that was all I had prepared for today. We'll meet back up again tomorrow."

"Tomorrow is Saturday."

"I am aware. Twilight informed me that this is an every day type of deal."

Anon groans.

"I don't want to do this every damn day."

"Language. And trust me, Anon, neither do I."

She winces, realizing that she's letting her frustration leak out a little bit.

"...Whatever."

Anon rises from his seat and makes no effort to put it away before making his way to the door. He doesn't say another word and throws the door open, disappearing into the darkness and leaving the tired teacher alone yet again. Once the door shuts behind him, Cheerilee immediately lets out a yell of frustration and slams her head onto her desk.

It doesn't matter who the student is. It doesn't matter who the one asking her to teach is. It doesn't matter what she's teaching. It doesn't matter how much effort she puts in. It doesn't matter that nopony knows what she goes through every single day just trying to survive, and it doesn't matter that there is now a literal alien involved in those everyday affairs.

In the end, it's just more of the same.

Parent-Teacher Conference

Cheerilee wavers as she stands in place, her fatigue finally catching up to her. She fights with all her might to stay conscious, doing her best to focus on the cool morning breeze that causes her mane to gently sway back and forth. She stands before the Golden Oak Library a few hours before her scheduled meeting time with Anon. She has a purpose, but as she tries to rub the crustiness from her tired eyes, she starts to ponder if this trip was even worth it.

In that moment, Cheerilee hears a few voices from behind her. She turns slightly and glances at the dirt road leading to the library, noticing Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon walking by. They look in her direction, causing her to immediately look back towards the library. She cannot let her students see her like this, least of all Diamond Tiara.

Choosing the lesser of two evils, Cheerilee approaches the tree-made-library and gently knocks on the door. After a few moments, she is greeted by Twilight's assistant, Spike, who looks up at her with a smile.

"Good morning Ms. Cheerilee. Um, not that I'm trying to shoo you away or anything, but you know the library doesn't open for another couple of hours, right?"

"Good morning to you too, Spike. And yes, I know. I was hoping to speak to Twilight, if she's available?"

"Let me go check. Knowing her, she stayed up all night studying and is still asleep at her desk."

Cheerilee chuckles as Spike disappears behind the door, his tiny dragon feet making audible pitter-patter noises on the wood flooring beneath him. Unsure of what to do with herself, Cheerilee tries to straighten out her mane and tail in an attempt to make herself look as not-tired as possible.

After a couple of minutes, the door opens once again. This time, it's Twilight who greets her.

"Hello, Ms. Cheerilee! Is there something I can help you with?"

"Actually Twilight, if you weren't too busy, I was hoping you might have a few moments to discuss... you know..." Cheerilee leans in closer to Twilight, though she's not quite sure who she's trying to keep this a secret from. "Anon?"

"Oh. S-sure! Come on in."

Twilight steps aside, allowing Cheerilee into the library. Despite it being so early, Spike has already made the tree feel cozy and comfortable. The hollowed-out tree is illuminated by several windows as well as a number of freshly lit candles scattered across a few tables and shelves in the main reading space. As a result, the whole room feels like it has a warm glow and a relaxing atmosphere, which is exactly what Cheerilee needs right now.

"Can I get you something to drink?"

"No no, I'm okay. I don't think this will take too long."

"Well, okay then. Please, take a seat wherever you like." Cheerilee finds the nearest place to sit down, which happens to be on the end of a decently comfortable sofa. Twilight gives her a gentle smile and sits in a small wooden chair not far from said sofa, turning it to face her guest. "So, what's going on? I have a bad feeling it's not good news."

"Well... I'm just a bit confused, is all."

Cheerilee looks at Twilight with guilt and trepidation, but Twilight just smiles and gently nods her head.

"Go on."

"Well, his behavior is... questionable, I suppose."

"Wait, really? What has he been doing?"

"Everything a student shouldn't. He talks back, he doesn't pay attention, he actively insults both me and the material... he's essentially every part of a problem child at once. And I can't figure out how the heck I'm supposed to discipline him since he's a grown adult! What do I do, take away his recess?"

Twilight stares at Cheerilee with wide eyes, her mouth slightly agape. She sits like that for a few awkward, silent moments before finally remembering to speak.

"I... I'm sorry, I'm just trying to process this. That doesn't sound like the Anon I know at all."

"How so? What's he like with you?"

"He's the epitome of a gentlecolt! Or, I suppose in his case, a gentleman. He always treats my friends and I with respect. He apologizes frequently. He's fun to be around, and even when he does something wrong - which is often - he always bounces right back with a smile on his face. He's never once complained to me about anything! Well, except his homesickness, I suppose."

"He's never sarcastic with you? Or passive-aggressive, or rude, or angry?"

"No, never."

"..."

Cheerilee stares at the floor with a blank look on her face. It seems she was right about Anon acting differently towards Twilight, but she wasn't expecting this. He has Twilight completely fooled!

After a few moments, she looks back up at the unicorn, determination and anger on her face.

"Twilight, I think he's taking advantage of you."

"Excuse me?"

"I saw it myself when you dropped him off the other day. He was acting all nice and everything, but the second we were behind closed doors, it was like he was a different person. If nothing else, he was most certainly trying to get under my skin the whole time!"

"Not that I don't believe you, but I just can't imagine him acting like that."

"..."

"Heh, you know, this is sort of like you approaching the parent of a problematic student, isn't it?" Cheerilee looks up at Twilight, who gives her a sheepish grin. "Surely you've had this kind of conversation before."

"I... suppose I have, yes."

Cheerilee's frustration slowly begins to fade as the dots begin to connect in her head.

"Then maybe you're right. I don't know why Anon would try to stay on my good side, but it's unacceptable if he's behaving like that when I'm not around." Twilight sighs. "I just wish he was honest with me."

"I'm sorry you had to learn this way, Twilight."

Cheerilee bites her tongue before she can say anything more. In the span of this brief conversation, she figured it out. Twilight is giving Anon everything he could ever want. She's given him protection thanks to her status, she's given him friendship with ponies that will make professionally tailored suits for him, and she's given him an entire freaking house. For free. Of COURSE he acts nice around her! Meanwhile, why would he need to hide his true self from his teacher, who has nothing of the sort to offer him? THAT'S what he's really like.

...Right?

"This changes quite a few things, I think." Twilight looks up at Cheerilee, and she notices a growing sadness in the librarian's eyes. "I'll go speak to him. For now, I don't want you to have to go through that anymore. You can consider your job done from now on. I'll handle the rest." Twilight gets up from her seat and starts to step towards the door, taking a deep breath as she does so. "Thank you for your help, Ms. Cheerilee."

Cheerilee stands as well. For a brief moment, she feels relieved. This is what she wanted, isn't it? To be rid of this burden? For Twilight to learn who Anon actually is? To be able to reclaim that little bit of extra free time every day?

...

"Wait, Twilight."

"Hm?"

Before Twilight can reach the door, Cheerilee runs up alongside her and places a hoof on her back to stop her.

"I don't think that will be necessary."

"What do you mean?"

"The more I think about it, the more I'm realizing that Anon is... complicated. If I just spend a bit more time with him, I think I'll be able to figure all of this out without any need for confrontation. B-besides..." Cheerilee is hesitant to finish her thought. She doesn't even know why she's doing this. After all, Twilight is the type of mare who will pay her regardless of the fact that she's only been teaching him for a couple of days, so why even bother? And yet, something in her heart won't let it end like this. "Maybe we're wrong. Maybe there's more going on than we think."

"I really hope so," Twilight says, her gaze falling to the floor. "I genuinely thought things were going well with him."

"Give me one more day. I'll send you a letter later tonight letting you know whether or not I'll be continuing with him."

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm gonna do what I do best." Cheerilee gives Twilight a forced smile as she walks in front of her and opens the door. "I'm going to give him a pop quiz."

"Done."

Anon, having been forced to use Cheerilee's desk as it is the only one large enough to accommodate his comparatively massive body, slides his stapled-together packet of paper towards his teacher, who sits across from him. All of the blanks are filled in, just as she asked. She glances at the clock. He had ten minutes to take the quiz, but he finished it in six. Most of her regular students can't even accomplish that. Granted, she's never given this specific quiz to her students, but she digresses. After all, this pop quiz was meant to cover everything she discussed with Anon over the last couple of days. In particular, she wrote extremely specific questions about the topics he wasn't paying attention to.

In truth, she has mixed feelings about this little experiment of hers. On one hoof, she still doesn't know what compelled her to do this in the first place. She wants to be done with this, to wash her hooves clean of Anon and move on with her miserable life. On the other, she feels a strange desire to see Anon succeed, as if he were just another one of her students. But just LOOK at him! He's a grown adult seated uncomfortably across from her in a schoolhouse made for little children. Heck, from their conversation, it almost felt like Twilight sees him as a child!

Wait. How has she been seeing him? She did just talk to Twilight like that mare is his mom or something. Heck, she's giving him a purposefully difficult pop quiz to, what, prove a point? To who? Herself? Twilight? Anon? Why is she doing this?!

Ugh. Oh well. Nothing to do now but see if he managed to retain a single bit of information over these last few days.

...Huh?

Huh?

Huh?!

"Anon!"

"Yeah?"

"Y-you got a perfect score!"

"I know." Anon looks at Cheerilee with a bored-yet-cocky smile. "Did you expect anything less?"

"How?! I know for a fact that you haven't been paying attention!"

"Then maybe you have your 'facts' wrong." Anon reaches into his back pocket, once again producing the small notebook he had a few days ago. Cheerilee glances at it, and her eyes widen as she realizes that the page it has been opened to is filled with writing. "I know how to listen."

"But... but you've been complaining every step of the way!"

"Trust me, I'm not exactly a fan of you rambling on and on all day long. But considering you never shut your trap, it's hard to not catch what you're saying."

"I-"

"Besides, you made this quiz way too easy. That's your fault, not mine." Anon grunts as he stands up, stretching his back as he does so. "And I believe you said I could go home if I passed your stupid little quiz. So, I'm outta here."

Anon nonchalantly walks towards the door of the schoolhouse, throwing it open with one hand and stepping outside.

"Wait, Anon!" To her surprise, he does actually stop, though he doesn't turn around to look at her. "...Thank you."

"For what?"

"For proving me wrong."

"...Don't get your tail in a twist over it." Anon raises one hand into the air to do the low-effort wave Cheerilee has gotten used to seeing from him. "See ya tomorrow."

"Goodbye, Anon."

She barely manages to say her goodbye before the door closes behind him. She stares at that closed door for several quiet moments before a tiny smile makes its way to her face.

Make no mistake, she still doesn't like him. She also still hasn't quite figured out why he acts the way he does, but despite the morning's events, she can't help but want to give him the benefit of the doubt. Besides, unlike her other students, he has actually proven that he has been listening. Her lessons did mean something. In a strange way, for the first time in a long time, she really, truly feels like a teacher.

A smile still on her face, she immediately finds some paper and ink.

Dear Twilight Sparkle, I believe that we may have both been wrong about Anon. I will continue to act as his mentor. In the meantime, I feel that it might be best to give him some extra space to figure things out on his own. I'm interested in seeing where this goes. Regards, Cheerilee

At Their Worst

Slowly, the days turn to weeks as Cheerilee gets adjusted to this new normal. She wakes up earlier than she'd like, she gets ready for school, she gets the schoolhouse ready to go, she teaches a class of uninterested students, she watches helplessly as said students get bullied, she dismisses the class, she starts teaching Anon, she gets increasingly frustrated with his behavior, she heads home when the sun is already half-set, she eats whatever scraps she can afford for dinner, and finally, she passes out and prays that she wakes up on time the next morning. All the while, she hopes she has enough money to pay whatever bills came in the mail that day.

Lately, she hasn't.

She glances down at her kitchen table, her exhausted, freshly awoken eyes filled with contempt. The pile of unpaid bills is getting progressively bigger. She decides to check on her funds, a slight sparkle in her eyes as she does so. Teaching Anon is definitely a lucrative job. After all, she's essentially getting paid by Princess Celestia herself, and that mare has money to burn. Frankly, considering her credentials, she couldn't even dream of a job that pays as much relative to the time commitment.

It seems like she'll finally have enough.

As she adjusts to being awake properly, she shifts her attention to the single letter lying next to the pile of bills. It's completely unmarked, and was likely dropped off by the sender themself. Cheerilee knows exactly what it is. She hesitates for just a moment before letting out a sigh of resignation and opening it in a borderline violent manner. Just as she expected, it's another notice.

...W-wait, what? Why is it even more this time?!

Her eyes start to lose focus and her mind begins to drift. There's no way this is real, right? She was finally making enough money... so why?! What has she been struggling for?! What has she been sacrificing her time and her well-being for?!

What is the point in any of this?!

Cheerilee stumbles, just barely managing to catch herself before she falls to the ground. Her body feels cold, to the point where she's shivering. Her breathing starts to become shaky. She finds herself leaning on the table for balance while she does what little she can to calm herself down. She HAS to calm down. She has a job to do.

...

She suddenly takes a deep breath. Something feels strange. She glances towards a nearby window, and she immediately recognizes that the sun is higher than she remembers it being just a moment ago. Realizing this, she frantically looks at a nearby clock.

She's late! How long was she just standing there?! With a terrified yelp, she hurriedly grabs her bag and sprints out the door, hoping to make it to the schoolhouse before the students get too worked up.

The schoolhouse door flings open, causing the room full of confused colts and fillies to look at their exhausted, unkempt teacher in shock.

"Hello, everypony! I'm so sorry I'm late, I hope I didn't worry you too much!"

Cheerilee trots towards her desk, her smile doing little to hide her disarray on account of her unfocused eyes and unkempt mane. Her ear twitches as she hears the students murmur amongst each other. She most definitely catches the word "human" in there more than once. She's not sure what kind of gossip is going around about her, but she's going to ignore it for now. It wouldn't be the first time baseless rumors were spread about her.

"Uhh, Miss Cheerilee?" Apple Bloom speaks up above the mumbles in an attempt to get her teacher's attention. "Are you feelin' alright?"

"Of course I am! Just... really excited to get going today!" Cheerilee typically doesn't have to force her smile in front of children, but right now, she doubts that there is a force in the world that could coax a genuine one out of her. "Speaking of, where were we? Ah, right! Cultures of the world!" She clears her throat and begins to write on the board, doing her best to start the day without bringing too much attention to the state that she is in. "It's no surprise that Equestria is populated mostly by earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorns. However, there are many other species both inside and outside of Equestria that you'll probably meet one day! You might have seen a griffon participate in a local flying competition, or perhaps you've even seen a yak during their travels. Plus, I'm sure most of you know Spike, Ponyville's resident dragon! All of these creatures function differently than ourselves, but that isn't a bad thing! In fact, it's the differences in our cultures that are our greatest strength!"

Although Cheerilee talks with practiced ease and feigned enthusiasm, she realizes pretty much immediately that very few of her students are listening. Doing her best to hold onto the last of her patience, she continues knowing full well that nopony in the class is going to retain any of this.

Again.

Cheerilee wakes up to the sound of knocking on the schoolhouse door. She picks her head up from her drool-stained desk, realizing that she must have passed out after the children left. By the time she gets her bearings, the door is already being opened. Unsurprisingly, Anon enters the classroom. He stands tall, though his expression looks almost as tired as Cheerilee's own.

"G-good afternoon, Anon." Cheerilee, now curious, glances at a nearby clock. He's over an hour late. "What took you so long? Even for all of your faults, you aren't typically late."

Anon sticks his hands in his pockets, his sharp eyes focused entirely on the floor as he makes his way over to the only chair that fits him.

"I'm sorry, or whatever." His voice seems just as tired as his expression. "But it's none of your business."

Cheerilee gives him a once-over as he sits down. She's seen a lot from him in the past few weeks, but this is new.

"Considering I'm supposed to be helping you adjust to life in Equestria, I don't think that's true."

"Yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?"

He is still refusing to look directly at her. For the most part, he never has any qualms with doing so, and it puts Cheerilee a bit on edge. Still, it doesn't bother her as much as it annoys her, just like everything else he does.

"Well, excuse me for being concerned."

"..."

"Anyway, today we're going to be covering some of the local flora and fauna you can expect to find around here."

"How riveting."

"You'll be thanking me when you almost stumble into a grove of poison joke. Now, pay attention. I'm going to be covering the important things you'll need to look out for first."

"Oh no, I sure hope the posies and the raccoons don't get me!"

"Do I need to tell Fluttershy that you've been mean to the wildlife?"

"Fluttershy? Really? Why would I be scared of Fluttershy?"

"It's not Fluttershy that would be the problem. It's the angry mob of ponies that would be out for your head when word got out that you upset her." Anon opens his mouth to speak, but quickly closes it again. "That's what I thought. Now, let's go over timberwolves."

This sort of back-and-forth goes on for the better part of an hour. Despite the constant bickering, both of them have grown quite used to this by now. In a way, it's almost comforting. However, that near-comfort is thrown off when there is yet another knock on the door. Unlike with Anon, whoever is on the other side is polite enough to not just throw the door open.

"Coming!" Cheerilee rushes over to the door before gingerly opening it, revealing none other than Twilight Sparkle on the other side. A dark expression is on her face. "Oh, hello Twilight. It's been a while, I-I wasn't expecting you."

"I'm sorry for dropping in unannounced, but this was the only time I knew I would be able to find Anon. I've got some important news from Princess Celestia." Her voice is low and somber, almost like she's on the verge of tears.

Anon notices Twilight's presence and immediately gets to his feet. The two mares walk further into the schoolhouse and close the door behind them for privacy, meeting Anon in the middle.

"Oh? Did she finally find a way to send me home?" Twilight doesn't respond, opting instead to stare at the floor with her bangs purposefully covering her eyes. "Twilight?"

"...She found out what happened to you, Anon."

"This... doesn't sound like good news."

Anon visibly shivers. Cheerilee can only watch with bated breath as Twilight prepares to share what she's learned, though she's fairly confident that both she and Anon already know what is about to be said.

"A magical surge. It's a rare phenomenon, but not completely unheard of. They happen suddenly, very suddenly. All we really know about them is that they carry unfathomable amounts of magic, and their affects can vary wildly. Long story short, you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"..."

"And..." Twilight takes a deep breath. "Even if we were somehow able to find exactly where you came from, not even the princesses would be powerful enough to send you back." Cheerilee watches as tears begin to fall from Twilight's hidden eyes onto the wooden floor below. "I'm so sorry." Her voice is shaky, hardly even loud enough to be considered a whisper.

Meanwhile, Anon stands perfectly still. His eyes are on Twilight, but their usual sharp focus has been replaced by an empty nothingness. The color has drained from his face, and his breathing is so slight, you might think he wasn't doing it at all.

The three of them stand there for what feels like an eternity, none of them knowing quite what to say. Eventually, Cheerilee is the one who breaks the silence.

"So, what now?"

Twilight finally finds the courage to lift her head. She is no longer crying, but her eyes tell a story of guilt and sorrow.

"Princess Celestia was prepared for this outcome. There is more to her message, but I don't want to overload Anon with-"

"I'm fine." The two mares look up at Anon with surprise. He isn't looking at either of them, his unfocused eyes instead trained on the wall in front of him. "It's not like I hadn't considered this possibility myself."

"But, Anon, you-"

"I said it's fine!" Both Twilight and Cheerilee flinch. In that moment, Cheerilee realizes that even with all of their bickering, she has never heard Anon sound like that. His voice isn't just angry or annoyed, it's full of dread. Of rage. Of sorrow. And never before has he ever raised his voice around Twilight for any reason. "...Just share the rest of the message."

"If... if you say so." Twilight takes a moment to compose herself before continuing. "Because you have nowhere to go, she is granting you citizenship, effective immediately. You'll get the necessary documents within a few days after they're processed. On top of that, she's also giving you this." Twilight's horn glows as she magically opens her bag, producing a small sack that jingles a bit in the air. "Until you can get a job of your own, she's providing you with some limited funds to keep yourself afloat. That way you don't have to keep working for me part-time at the library for what little I can afford to give you."

Anon doesn't speak for a moment, nor does it even look like he heard Twilight in the first place. However, when she opens her mouth to speak again, he interrupts her.

"Tell her I said thanks."

"O-okay. I'll just... leave this here."

Twilight places the sack of bits down on a nearby desk as she sheepishly smiles at Anon.

"Is that all?"

"Well... there's one more thing. She was hoping she might be able to lift your spirits a little bit."

Anon scoffs.

"And how did she plan to do that?"

"With these."

Once again, Twilight's horn glows as she digs around in her bag. After a few moments, she produces two golden tickets and levitates them towards Anon, who grabs them out of the air.

"What are they?"

"Tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala."

Cheerilee tries to hold in a gasp, but in doing so she only succeeds in snorting quite loudly, garnering the attention of both Twilight and Anon.

"S-sorry." Cheerilee attempts to clear her throat. "I just wasn't expecting that."

"...The heck is the 'Grand Galloping Gala?'"

"It's only the biggest, fanciest gala in Equestria! Literally everypony dreams of getting to go to it!"

Anon raises an eyebrow at the suddenly very excited Cheerilee.

"You included, I see." Cheerilee, now realizing that her excitement is showing, blushes and turns away. Anon, meanwhile, looks back at Twilight. "I think I remember you mentioning it, now. Didn't you and your friends ruin it last year?"

"Yeah, we're not exactly proud of that. This time, we're going to be on our best behavior, though."

"...Right. And why did Celestia invite me?"

"Well, you've been all over the newspapers lately. You're pretty much a household name now." It's slight, but Anon winces. Twilight doesn't notice. "Apparently, a lot of the folks in Canterlot are worried about 'the alien.' The princess wants to spend some time alongside you there, both to get to know you a little better, and to show you off to the gala crowd. You know, prove that you're actually civilized and respectable. ...Anon?"

Twilight notices Anon looking away from them. Where there were many conflicting emotions just moments ago, there is now nothing but a quiet fury. Cheerilee tilts her head in confusion.

"Anon? Is there a problem with that?"

When Anon speaks, his voice is quiet. Distant. Cold.

"'Show me off?' 'Prove I'm civilized?'" Anon lets out an incredulous snort. "She wants to parade me around like a damn circus monkey."

"Anon?"

"After all, I'm different. Either you're afraid of me and you hate me, or you're not and you think I'm stupid. Those are the only options, aren't they? "

"I can promise you, that is not Princess Celestia's intention! She isn't like that!"

"Yet she sent me to an elementary school like a child. She's giving me an allowance. She wants to 'show me off' to her colleagues like she has anything to do with me. And she thinks an invitation to some gaudy party makes up for the fact that she can't send me home!"

Anon, whose voice suddenly rose in volume, holds his head in his hands.

"You don't-"

"Twilight." Cheerilee places a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Just give him a moment."

Sure enough, Anon stands silently for a while. The two mares simply look at him with concern, but to their relief, his features slowly begin to soften as he calms down. Finally, he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. When he opens them again, they have regained their sharp focus that Cheerilee has grown used to.

"...Sorry about that."

"I-it's okay. You just had a lot dumped on you."

"Is there anything else?"

"No, that was everything."

"...Thanks."

"Y-you're welcome." Twilight glances nervously between Anon and Cheerilee. "Well, I, uh, I suppose I'll be getting back to the library now." Twilight politely turns away from the two. "I'm sorry once again. Goodbye."

In a rushed, awkward manner, Twilight dips out of the schoolhouse. Cheerilee feels incredibly awkward as she is left alone with a potentially emotionally unstable Anon. She stands extremely still as she side-eyes him, doing her best to read what he's feeling.

"...Not you too."

"Hm?"

"You're scared of me now, too. Aren't you?"

"N-no, absolutely not! It's just... what would you have me say right now? 'Everything is going to be okay?'"

"It's not."

"That's my point. There's nothing I can say that will magically fix everything." Cheerilee turns back around and sits at her desk, taking a deep breath as she does so. "...But. If you need somepony to talk to, I'm willing to listen."

Anon lets out a single, incredulous laugh.

"Really? You?"

"I'm trying to help you, damn it!"

Anon's mixture of powerful emotions immediately evaporates, replaced entirely by shock. His eyes are wide as he looks to Cheerilee, who stares back with an angry expression of her own.

"Did you just-"

"Yes! I did!" Cheerilee slams her head down on her desk. After everything that happened today, everything that's been happening, she was barely holding herself together. Then, when she tries to console Anon, quite possibly the only creature in Ponyville having a worse day than her, he continues to treat her like garbage! "And I really don't feel like arguing with you again!"

"Jeez, what happened to you?"

"You want to know what happened to me?!" Cheerilee raises her head from her desk. She knows that this is not the time nor the place for this. In fact, this is quite possibly the single most inappropriate, selfish time to explode on Anon. And yet, she can't stop herself. "You don't know a single thing about me!"

"Oh, and you're so knowledgeable about my life?!"

"I guarantee I know more about you than you do about me! You have no IDEA what I go through!"

"I'm literally stranded on a foreign planet for the rest of my life!"

"Wow, I'm so sorry Princess Celestia herself is giving you free money, and that Twilight Sparkle gave you a house, and that you were sent tickets to the most grandiose event in Equestrian history that I've only dreamt about going to since I was a filly! It must SUCK having everything given to you on a silver platter!"

"And you're any better?! I know damn well how much Celestia is paying you to 'mentor' me!"

"Hah! And what good THAT'S doing me!"

"I... huh?"

Cheerilee groans. She doesn't have to tell him a darn thing. She rubs her temple with a hoof, grabs her bag, and stands up from her desk.

"Fuck this. I need a drink."

"You're telling me."

With an almost delirious smile, Cheerilee continues to make her way towards the door.

"Why don't you join me then? Your next lesson can be about what a mare is like when she's at her absolute worst!"

To her surprise, Anon beats her to the door and opens it for her. Stupid long legs.

"Now THAT I have to see."

Cheerilee freezes just long enough for her to glance up at Anon and see his dumb, tired, cocky grin.

"I was being facetious." Cheerilee takes another few steps into the now-nighttime air. "...Ugh. Fine. Let's go."

A Drinking Game

"One more bottle."

The bartender, an older stallion with a combed mane and well-maintained mustache, nods silently at Anon before reaching behind the bar and sliding him another bottle of whiskey. Anon digs into the sack of bits Twilight gave him and pays the modest price before taking the bottle with him to the back of the tavern. There is a small half-circle shape in the back wall where a large circular table rests, a well-padded booth built into said wall acting as the seating. This table provides a great deal of privacy, which Cheerilee can appreciate. Not that there's much need for said privacy, as the only other patron in the tavern is Berryshine, who is conveniently asleep at her table.

Cheerilee glares at Anon as he reaches the table. Her cheeks are a bit rosy, and although there is a bit of color to Anon's cheeks, it isn't quite as pronounced as Cheerilee's. There are three shot glasses at the table, only one of which is within reach of the tired teacher. Anon sits across from her, where the other two glasses are. An empty bottle of whiskey sits in the middle of the table, its contents having already been hastily consumed by the bickering pair.

"I couldn't tell ya the last time somepony bought me a drink."

"That's not surprising."

"Oh, shut up."

Cheerilee immediately reaches for the bottle, pours herself a shot, and throws it down effortlessly.

"I gotta say, I didn't take you for a drinker. You come here often?"

"No. I couldn't afford to if I wanted to."

"Ya know, you keep saying something to that effect, but I don't really get it. Twilight's paying you a lot to mentor me. I know teachers don't get paid much, but Ponyville isn't exactly an expensive place to live. What's up with that?"

Cheerilee smiles. It seems genuine, but there is a quiet sadness to her eyes when she does.

"No amount of liquor will get that out of me, so don't bother asking."

Anon puts his hands up innocently.

"Alright, fine. I didn't want to know about your stupid finances anyway."

"Peh. Well, what about you? Drink often? Looks like it, considering you've had twice as much as I have."

"I'm also twice your size, Lee."

"...Lee?"

"We're both off-duty right now, and I give my friends nicknames. Deal with it."

"Haha, what? You don't even have a job to be 'off-duty' from. And who says we're friends?!"

"You know as well as I do that I'm not referring to work. We're off-duty from our public images."

"I-"

"And yeah, I'd say you're the closest thing to a friend I've got in Equestria." Anon briefly widens his eyes as he is reminded of the day's events, immediately pouring two more shots in response. "Sounds like I'm gonna need more from now on."

Like Cheerilee, he downs both shots with ease.

"What about Twilight? Isn't she your friend?"

"Our relationship is... complicated."

"I've been wondering about that. What's the deal with you two? Why do you act so nice around her?"

Anon looks Cheerilee dead in the eyes. Neither are all that drunk yet, but they're both feeling a buzz, and they're both in the mood to act a bit more open than usual. This gives Anon an idea. He reaches for the bottle and pours another shot on Cheerilee's behalf before pouring two of his own.

"How about this? We take turns. You take a drink, you get to ask a question for the other to answer. If you refuse to answer or you fail to keep your drink down, you lose. You in?"

Cheerilee raises an eyebrow before an amused smile makes its way to her face.

"Sure. This day can't get any worse, so why not?"

Anon smiles right back at her, feeling a similar sentiment. He motions towards her glass, and she smiles and takes a shot.

"Well, to answer your first question, it's because she's the one that found me."

"That's all?"

"My... appearance over by the library wasn't exactly gentle. A bunch of magic was coursing through my body, essentially burning me alive from the inside out. Of course, I didn't know that at the time. I just knew I was dying. Then, in came a purple horse with bangs. Her little horn started to glow, and the next thing I knew, there was this light shooting out of my mouth and my body started cooling down. Then I passed out again."

"She saved your life?"

Anon nods.

"I have a personal policy to repay my debts, but that's not one I can ever truly repay fully. It'd be ridiculous to devote my life to her or whatever other movie trope you might be thinking of, so I do my best to give her as little trouble as possible."

"That simple, huh?"

"What were you expecting?"

"I guess I don't know."

Anon shrugs.

"Either way, you got your answer. My turn." Anon nonchalantly stretches, easily downing two shots before folding his arms behind his head and leaning back with a smirk. "If you're such a good teacher, why do you let those three fillies get bullied all the time?"

Cheerilee glares at Anon. He really went right for the jugular first, didn't he? Well, up yours, Anon. Two can play at that game.

"You know Diamond Tiara, the pink one?"

"Snooty little thing, that one."

"Yeah. Well, there's this mare that holds a powerful position on the school board named Spoiled Rich. For all intents and purposes, she is my boss. If I ever disobey a single thing she says, I'll lose my job. Guess who Diamond's mother is?"

Anon laughs boisterously, his voice echoing throughout the quiet tavern.

"That's how it goes, isn't it? There's always an authority figure pulling strings for personal gain."

"Not necessarily, but whatever. Anyway, it's my turn." Cheerilee has a devilish grin on her face as she prepares to ask her question. Once she has one, she takes her shot. "Who were you before you came to Equestria?"

Anon gives Cheerilee an amused, yet confused smile.

"I'm not refusing to answer here, but I do need to ask for clarification, Lee."

"What do I need to clarify?"

"That's a bit of an open-ended question, don't you think? Unless a philosophical debate is what you're going for."

She chuckles.

"Just give me a quick summary of your life. Sell yourself."

"Alright, fine." Anon cracks his neck - a nervous habit perhaps - as he prepares to answer the question. "Well, my name is Anon. I grew up in a town called Quinceton. Tiny place, population of maybe five hundred. I was an only child, and my mom died when I was still a baby. It was just me and my dad for a long time. Things were... rough, growing up. Don't get me wrong, my dad loved me with all of his heart, but he had a gambling problem. Money was tight." Cheerilee blinks as she hangs on Anon's every word. "I learned how to penny-pinch wherever possible. Then, I graduated high school. I had good enough grades to be accepted into a small college a few towns away with a scholarship, and I eventually got a degree in accounting. I moved out of my dad's place, got a job as an accountant (surprise surprise), and then... I lost it all in an instant." Without being prompted, Anon pours himself one extra shot just for the hell of it. "Anyway, was that what you were looking for?"

"Anon, I... wow."

"Come on, it wasn't that interesting."

Cheerilee slams her hooves onto the table and lifts herself up in an attempt to convey her sudden anger.

"You mean to tell me you have a COLLEGE DEGREE, yet you still act like a fool in my classroom?!"

Anon laughs again, this time shrugging as he does so.

"I passed your stupid quiz the other day, didn't I?! I know how to study, but I never said my professors liked my attitude!"

Cheerilee glares at Anon for a few moments before sitting back down.

"Sure, whatever."

"Hah. Anyway, back to me." Anon pours himself two more shots and downs them like water. "Why are you so tired all the time?"

"Heh, that's an easy one. It's because everything SUCKS, Anon."

Anon grins at her through half-lidded eyes.

"Come on. You can do better than that."

"Well, that's the truth. Everything sucks. I thought being a teacher was my calling. I love seeing students excited about learning, and I love watching them figure things out and grow up right in front of my eyes."

"You sound like you'd make a great mother."

"Pfft. A sweet thought, but that's not gonna happen. Not at my age." There's an awkward silence for a moment before Cheerilee shakes her head. "Anyway, it's been getting harder and harder lately. It's like the kids don't have any drive to learn anymore. They don't care what I say. I'm doing the best I can, but with the EEA breathing down my neck... ugh."

"What's the EEA?"

"The Equestrian Education Association. They make all the big-shot rules about schools in Equestria."

"And I take it they make it hard for you to do your job?"

"You don't know the half of it. Between that, and the pay not being very good, and YOU..." Cheerilee closes her eyes and downs another drink, ready to take her turn. Her face is becoming more and more flushed, and her demeanor is "loosening up" even more. "Anyway. Hmhm. Why are you so rude all the time?"

"I'm not rude ALL the time. Just when I'm around those that I really really like, or really really don't like. It's fun watching those that I don't like get pissed off about it. Those that I do like usually know me well enough to not take it seriously."

"And which one am I~?"

"At first, you were the latter. You've become the former since, though." Anon's cheeks go a bit red, but whether that's due to his words or the alcohol is up for debate. "Either way, I just find it easier than wearing my heart on my sleeve. Too easy to get hurt, you know? I make an exception for children though, they don't deserve my sarcasm."

"How noble," she says in a mocking tone.

"Whatever, Lee." Anon quickly downs two more shots, clearly doing better than Cheerilee at this point. "How old are you?"

"Didn't your mother ever teach you not to ask a lady her age?" Anon gives Cheerilee an unamused stare. "...OH! Oh I am so sorry."

Anon laughs out loud again.

"I'm kidding. Keep going."

"Well, I'm thirty-four years old and counting. Happy?"

"Wait, really?"

"I'm well past my prime, Anon."

"Bullshit, you look great, Lee."

Cheerilee looks at Anon in complete shock for a moment. She is most likely blushing, but it's almost impossible to tell through her alcohol-induced flushed cheeks.

"Th-thank you..."

"And before you waste one of your questions, I'm only twenty-six."

"...Well, you're younger than I thought."

"Is that a problem?"

After a moment, Cheerilee smiles and starts laughing for no particular reason.

"Not at all!"

Anon smiles back, patiently waiting to see if Cheerilee takes another shot. After she calms herself down, she does.

"What do you plan to do for work? O-once we're done with our lessons, I mean."

"Don't know. We'll see if my accounting degree can be of any use, but considering it's from another world, I've got my doubts about that. I'll find something, though. That a good enough answer for you?"

Cheerilee pouts, and it's surprisingly adorable.

"You're a lot less sure of yourself when you're drunk."

"Or maybe I'm just not hiding my true self in here." Without saying anything else on the subject, Anon takes a couple more shots. "Apart from financial security, what's your biggest dream in life?"

Cheerilee smiles and mumbles to herself in a drunken manner for a moment before focusing enough on Anon to respond to his question.

"The gala."

"The... gala?"

"We talked about it earlier, dummy! Ever since I was a little filly, I've wanted to go to the Grand Galloping Gala!" Cheerilee rests her head on the table, a look of longing on her face all the while. "I want to wear a pretty dress and eat the high-class food and just get to be where the actually important ponies are." Anon stares at Cheerilee for a moment or two, though she doesn't notice. What she does notice is a golden ticket being placed on the table right in front of her nose. "H-huh?"

"Celestia sent me two. Twilight already has one of her own, so, you know."

"..." Cheerilee doesn't move. Instead, she sits in her seat as still as can be, her eyes trained on the ticket. Her pupils widen and begin to sparkle, a tiny, involuntary squee leaving her mouth all the while. Eventually, she reaches out to poke the ticket. It does, in fact, react to her touch. Seeing this, she reaches out again, this time picking the ticket up. Sure enough, the ticket is real. "Anon... I..."

"Don't get emotional on me Lee, you're-" Anon is cut off by Cheerilee sliding around the booth and giving him a sloppy hug. "Drunk."

"Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou~!"

"Come on Lee, you're gonna be really embarrassed about this in the morning."

Anon practically pries her off of him and holds her at bay until she finally settles down enough to sit on her own.

"Itsh... my turn now, right?"

"No, no I think we're gonna call this a draw. I'm cutting you off."

"Aww, come on!"

Before Anon can react, Cheerilee fills all three shot glasses and pours them into her mouth simultaneously. Seconds later, she sprints to the restroom.

"...Yeah, that's about what I expected." Anon nonchalantly reaches for the glass of whiskey, which is still about half full. With a shrug, he pours the rest of it into his mouth without showing any sort of strain. While there is a slight hint of pink to his cheeks, it doesn't look much worse than after their first bottle. "These ponies cannot hold their liquor. This crap is basically water compared to the stuff back home."

Cheerilee groans as sunlight pours through her window and into her eyes. She slowly begins to sit upright, but she is immediately hit with an awful headache. It's been a long time since she has felt this way, but she knows damn well what this feeling is. She's hungover.

...Wait a minute. She has work today!

Doing her best to ignore the throbbing pain in her head, she glances at a nearby clock. She's darn near two hours late! Booking it out of the bedroom, she immediately rushes towards her kitchen table to grab her bag.

"Hey, Anon."

"Morning, Lee."

"...W-wait, what?!" Cheerilee jumps in place, only now realizing that Anon is lying on her couch. He starts to stand up, stretching as he does so. "What are you doing in my house?!"

"You got really sick last night, Lee. I had to carry you home. Then I had to hold your mane for you while you vomited." Anon sighs, and Cheerilee notices the dark bags under his eyes. "All night long."

"I... oh Celestia, I am so sorry."

Anon waves her off.

"Eh, I ended up crashing on your couch, so we'll call it even."

"Well, as much as I appreciate it, I need to get-"

"Stop."

Anon steps in front of Cheerilee, cutting her off right as she was making her way towards the front door.

"Anon, I need to get to school!"

"I already got a substitute for ya. As far as anyone else is concerned, you weren't feeling well during our lesson yesterday and asked me to inform everyone that you were taking the day off."

Anon winks.

"I... look, I know you mean well, but I can't afford to-"

"To what, pass out in front of your students?!" Anon raises his voice at Cheerilee, catching her by surprise. She is speechless as she looks at him with wide eyes. "Look at yourself, Lee. You've barely been able to make it through a REGULAR school day. Can you honestly tell me that you'd be able to get through the day in your current condition?" Cheerilee opens her mouth to speak, but no words come out. Her gaze slowly falls to the floor. "That's what I thought."

"...You don't understand, Anon. I need the money."

"I'm sure you do. But you also want to be an exemplary role model for your students, right?" She looks back up at Anon, her eyes growing misty. "It's just one day."

"...Just one day. Right."

"Now get back to bed. I don't want to have to watch your old mare ass all day long."

"H-hey!" Although she is at first offended, Cheerilee surprises even herself when she catches herself giggling at Anon's insult. It looks like he's right back to his usual self after all. "Goodnight, Anon. Or, I guess, good morning?"

Anon just smiles and holds one hand in the air as a wave goodbye, opening the front door in the process.

"See ya, Lee."

Cheerilee smiles back at him as the door closes behind him. Although her memory of the previous night is fuzzy, she remembers being really, really happy for some reason. She just shakes her head and walks back into her bedroom, ready to go back to bed and hopefully sleep off her hangover.

And that's when she sees the golden ticket sitting on her counter.

"...Sweet Celestia." She grabs the ticket and gingerly turns it around in her hooves. "I'm... I'm going to the Grand Galloping Gala." Unable to contain her childlike excitement, Cheerilee begins to trot in place and squeal. "I'M GOING TO THE GRAND GALLOPING GALA!" It takes her some time to regain her composure, but that headache of hers speeds up the process dramatically. She places the ticket back down on her counter and crawls into bed, her exhausted eyes falling closed almost immediately. Sleep overtakes her, but not before she mumbles one more thing beneath her breath. "Thank you, Anon."

Bending the Rules

Cheerilee's day off was better than she could have ever imagined. At one point she got out of bed to make herself some food, and she spent a little bit of time cleaning up before settling down with a book she hadn't had time to read in months. It was a slow, relaxing day, something that she hadn't had in a long, long time.

Then, when the following day came around, she had energy to spare. It's true that her class was still as unenthusiastic as ever, and she still felt herself becoming more and more drained as the day went on. However, when it came time to act as Anon's mentor again, she found herself not hating it as much as she had been. Yes, he was still acting like a douchebag, with a quip or a sarcastic remark prepared for seemingly every little thing she said. And yet, she didn't feel any hostile intent from his words. In fact, she caught herself responding to his strange sense of cynicism in kind, which seemed to humor him. Sure enough, by the time he went home, she didn't feel tired at all. How strange.

Thus, the next several weeks continued just like this. Yes, she is still exhausted. Yes, her life is still looking quite bleak. But there can be no doubt that she is, at the very least, happier. And now, she finds herself teaching Anon in the late afternoon once again.

"And that's how the Pillars of Equestria banished the three sirens to another dimension, never to be seen again!"

"By Equestria, you mean."

"I... huh?"

"So, they threw the sirens into another dimension. What about the creatures living over there? How did they deal with the sirens?"

"Well, I... I suppose I never really questioned that."

"That's how you ponies are, isn't it? Out of sight, out of mind."

"HAH! I think I'd be better off if you left my mind whenever you weren't around."

"Ohoho! You think about me that often?"

Cheerilee blushes just a tad and looks away from Anon.

"As if!"

"Not my fault I'm so irresistible."

"You know what? I'm assigning you homework!"

"H-homework?"

"That's right!" Cheerilee looks back at Anon, the blush not quite gone from her face, but a confident smile still breaking through it. She quickly grabs some paper from a nearby cabinet and begins furiously writing. "Here!" She slams the paper down in front of Anon, who looks at it with trepidation. "A scavenger hunt!"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me! A scavenger hunt!" Cheerilee points to the first item on the freshly written list. "An Apoca Bloom, a copy of 'Chromeo and Mareiet,' and a necklace of jade!"

"Why?"

"All items that we have been covering in class, which you would know if you pay attention as much as you claim to." Cheerilee tilts her head back a bit and attempts to look down at Anon, but fails miserably due to how tall he is even when sitting down. "Surely a task like this isn't too much for a 'grown man' like you, hmm?"

Anon grumbles something beneath his breath before grabbing the piece of paper and crumpling it in his hand as an act of defiance.

"Oh, I'll get your stupid project done. Heck, I'll get it done tonight."

"I look forward to seeing you try."

The two lean in extremely close in an attempt to intimidate the other, but they both stop when their noses are barely an inch apart. They both decide to turn away as their cheeks turn red.

"I'll see ya tomorrow, Lee."

"That's Ms. Cheerilee to you!" Anon sticks one hand in the air again as he exits the schoolhouse, not able to hear Cheerilee mumble beneath her breath. "In here, at least."

As Cheerilee takes a moment to regain her composure and collect her belongings, she suddenly freezes. According to EEA regulations, she isn't allowed to give out projects like that anymore. Especially not on a whim!

Oh no. Oooooooooooooh no no no no no no. This is bad. REALLY bad. She can't defy the EEA! What if somepony finds out?! She could lose her job! She could lose her income! She could be exposed for-

Cheerilee purposefully slams her head against a wall, forcing her thoughts to stop. It hurts. A lot. But at least her head is quiet. Closing her eyes, she takes a deep breath.

Anon's education isn't being handled through the EEA. Nopony is going to say anything. She's going to be fine. She's going to be fine. She's going to be fine.

...Yeah. She's going to be fine.

With a resolute nod to no one in particular, she finally grabs her bag and heads home, surprisingly eager to see how Anon does.

As Cheerilee's students return to the schoolhouse after another typical recess, they're caught off guard by the dark expression on their teacher's face. She sits at her desk, resting her chin on her folded hooves as she silently watches them enter. A stack of papers sits before her, and every single student knows darn well what those papers are.

"Class." The students takes their seats, each and every one too terrified to say a word. "Do you mind telling me why not a single one of you passed this month's test?" The schoolhouse is silent, the room full of terrified, guilty looking children all waiting for anyone else to say something. "Anypony?"

Finally, Scootaloo of all ponies manages to break the silence.

"...S-sorry, Ms. Cheerilee. It's just... learning about foreign cultures is so boring. It's hard to remember all that stuff!"

"I promise you, it is not 'boring,' it is one of the most important lessons for you to learn here! What if you run into a creature different than yourself, and they need your help? What will you do?"

"Uhh... help them?"

"And if you don't understand what they're saying, or what they need?"

"If I can't understand them, why are they asking me for help?"

"Scootaloo, that isn't the point! What if... you know, if you were to... ugh!"

The students all flinch as Cheerilee's head hits her desk. About as soon as that happens, she picks herself back up again, trying desperately to play it cool.

"Ms. Cheerilee?"

"It's fine! Everything is fine!" Cheerilee takes a very deep breath to calm herself down before speaking again. "Anyhow, let's move on. Perhaps you'll actually retain the lecture this time."

The door to the schoolhouse flings open. Cheerilee picks her head off of her desk to see Anon arrive shortly after her last student departed. He makes no effort to close the door behind him as he enters, opting instead to let it close on its own as he appears to be carrying something.

"Got the shit you asked for."

Anon haphazardly dumps a glowing white flower, a book, and a necklace adorned with little green gemstones onto Cheerilee's desk.

"...Huh."

"Told you I'd get 'em."

"And how did you?"

"Got help from Zecora, got help from Twilight, and got help from Rarity. In that order."

"Don't you think that's cheating?"

"Wasn't the whole point of our little mentorship bullshit to teach me how to acclimate myself to Equestria? That's exactly what I'm doing, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is, but... but... huh."

Cheerilee trails off, her eyes losing focus. However, the exhaustion in her face seems to lessen just a little bit. Anon raises an eyebrow.

"What's wrong with you? You might be old, but you shouldn't be ready for the glue factory yet."

"..."

"...Lee?"

"Wha?!"

Cheerilee suddenly snaps back to the present, as if she only just remembered that Anon is there.

"You good?"

Anon's teasing takes a slight turn towards genuine concern.

"Y-yes, I'm fine."

"...Come on. Spill it."

"Hm?"

"There's something on your mind. Out with it."

"It's really none of your-"

"Just shut up and tell me."

"..." Cheerilee stares at Anon for a moment or two before sighing. "You need to learn to give up."

"I was thinking the same thing about you."

Cheerilee chuckles.

"It's just... I wish I could teach my students the same way I teach you."

"Hmm?"

"You just... you get it! I can give you projects! I can take you out to the town whenever I want. I can prove a point however I deem necessary, and guess what? It works!" Cheerilee throws her hooves into the air before slamming them back down again. "Can't do that with these damn kids! Not if the EEA has anything to say about it!"

"How would they know if you just bent a rule here or there?"

"Trust me, Anon." Cheerilee locks eyes with her human companion. Her expression is about as serious as he's ever seen. "They'd find out."

"Then screw 'em over in another way."

"Feh. And what do you mean by that?"

"I mean that you don't have to break the rules." Anon leans onto Cheerilee's table, bringing himself ever closer to the tired mare. "You just need to think outside the box. Be the reason why they make new rules."

"Heh. As much as I love the idea of sticking it to the EEA, that'd never work. Their rules are more or less all-encompassing. Not much I can do to wriggle out of them."

"Then let's brainstorm. What's something that the little gremlins like?"

"Recess."

"And?"

"Going home."

"And?"

"..."

Cheerilee thinks for a moment. Due to her extremely busy schedule, she doesn't really get a chance to see the students outside of class all that often. She can make a guess or two, but the last time she actually saw them all collectively excited outside of recess was...

Wait a minute.

Cheerilee looks to Anon, her eyes sparkling with the glow of a mare that just had an idea.

"I like that look in your eye, Lee." Anon quietly laughs to himself. "Let's fuck some shit up in the most tame way possible."

"Any questions?"

Every student in the schoolhouse raises their hoof, their eyes glued to the front of the classroom and excited smiles plastered to their faces. Cheerilee just sits back and watches, an ecstatic look on her face as well.

"What about you, Snails?"

Anon, who stands before the classroom, points at the orange colt in the back.

"Uhh, what do you humans eat in your world?"

"Oh, it's a lot of the same stuff you ponies eat! There are some differences, though. We don't eat flowers, we typically have fewer veggies, and... oh yeah, we can't eat hay!"

The class erupts into a combination of giggles and gasps.

"You can't eat hay?! That's terrible!"

Anon smiles at Snails and laughs, knowing he'd get that type of reaction out of them. Hay is a very popular food among schoolchildren after all, easily comparable to french fries in his own world.

Even though this world also has french fries. Weird.

"That's just normal for us! We can't digest it as well as you ponies do. Still, there are plenty of things we eat that you all don't."

"Like what?"

Cheerilee leans forward, a look of warning on her face as she glares at Anon. He wasn't supposed to go there.

"Ever have deep fried butter?" The students react with a large range of emotions, from joy, to disgust, to intrigue. "We humans are pretty good at coming up with weird stuff like that! Can't say I'd recommend it, but I'm sure somepony would like it!"

The class laughs once again and Cheerilee stands from her desk, happy with Anon's performance.

"Well class, now do you see? Learning about other cultures is interesting! You just have to dig a little bit deeper!" She glances at the clock, seeing that it's almost five minutes past the time the students are scheduled to go home. "Alright, you're all dismissed. Be sure to thank Mr. Anon before you leave!"

"Thank you, Mr. Anon!" The class shouts in unison.

The students all gather their things and make their way out of the schoolhouse with noticeably more energy than is normal for them after a school day. Once the last few students are out the door, Anon shuts it and turns to Cheerilee.

"Well?"

"I'm still shocked at how good you are with kids. Did you see them?!"

Cheerilee beams from ear to ear. She hasn't felt this energized in years.

"Oh, I saw 'em. I think they're going to remember a thing or two about that."

"I'll say! They haven't retained anything from my lectures! Every single one of them failed their tests, but today... Scootaloo didn't even fall asleep! It's like a miracle!"

"That's what bending the rules gets ya, Lee. Who are the EEA to tell you how to do your job?"

"You know what?" Cheerilee laughs, and it sounds almost hysteric. "You're right! Fuck the EEA!"

"Yeah!"

"I don't have to listen to them!"

"Yeah! Down with authority!"

"I'm a teacher, damn it! And I'm gonna teach!"

"You do it, Lee!"

"Now get out!"

"I... huh?"

Cheerilee begins to shove Anon out the door, a smile still on her face.

"It's nothing against you, Anon, but I have SO MANY IDEAS! I need to get started right now! We'll meet back up again tomorrow!"

"O-okay?" She closes the door behind him, leaving him outside of the schoolhouse with a confused, albeit amused expression. "Good luck, Lee."

Alone once more, Cheerilee immediately begins to dig through a few cabinets. She grabs some paper, markers, sticky notes, and everything in-between. Forget the EEA. Forget their regulations. She is going to help these kids learn!

And help them she did. Over the next couple of weeks, she assigned the students strange projects. She sent them on scavenger hunts, put them into groups and had them create posters, asked them to talk about things that actually interest them to tie it all back into the greater lessons at hand. She was breaking every single rule the EEA had placed on her. And yet, for the first time in a long time, she felt like she was actually doing something. She was actually teaching.

And the students were actually learning.

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were less huffy after class, meaning that they largely left their victims alone. Scootaloo displayed more energy than ever. Test scores finally started improving, and the students were actually asking questions! What a world!

Cheerilee breathes in the cool evening air as she walks home. She woke up feeling good. It went well with her class. It went well with Anon. Despite it all, she actually feels... happy.

Maybe everything is going to be okay after all.

Spoiled

"And you're sure you understand Equestrian law? Thoroughly?"

"I do." Anon sits across from Cheerilee, his arms folded over his chest. School just got out about fifteen minutes ago, so they've only just gotten started with the day's lesson. "Twilight went over most of the common laws with me when I first arrived, and they're pretty similar to the ones we had back in my old world."

"Alright, but don't blame me if you end up in jail over a misunderstanding."

"Can I still ask you for bail money?"

"Ha! As if I could afford that."

The two smile at each other. Over time, these "lessons" have been getting less and less formal. Heck, at this point, it feels more like a daily meetup between close friends than anything else.

"Speaking of, I've been meaning to ask you... do you have something ready to go for tom-"

Anon is cut off by the sound of the schoolhouse door suddenly opening. One mare enters the building, her form illuminated by the setting sun behind her. Her coat is a light pink, and her mane is varying hues of purple. She wears a shirt that appears to be made of fine silk, and she is adorned with all manner of jewelry. Her piercing eyes carry an intensity that outmatches even Anon's, and despite the fact that he's never met this mare before, her mere presence tells him everything he needs to know about her: She's a big deal, and he isn't going to like her. She eyes Anon with disdain as she slowly enters the schoolhouse. Anon glances over at Cheerilee, though he raises an eyebrow when he notices that she is frozen stiff, her eyes filled with fear.

"Cheerilee." The mare's voice is cold and commanding. Anon immediately narrows his eyes at her, carefully watching her every move as she approaches the teacher. "Another fine day of teaching, I take it?"

"..."

"I believe I asked you a question, Cheerilee."

"...Y-yes." Cheerilee avoids direct eye contact with the mare. When she speaks, her voice is quiet and shaky. Whoever this mare is, she has her in a near state of panic. She attempts to clear her throat, but it's so forced it sounds almost painful. "W-what are you doing here? There wasn't a school board meeting scheduled for today."

"It is not required for the head of the school board to provide notice ahead of a meeting. If I feel that there is an appropriate enough reason, I can stop by whenever I please. And believe me, Cheerilee." The mare leans in close, causing Cheerilee to cower away slightly. "We have much to discuss."

"Back off." Anon takes a step towards the mare, but she doesn't even flinch. She looks at him, the contempt on her face enough to make most ponies recoil. "I don't know who you are, but you're in her personal space."

"I take it you're the alien, then. Peh." The mare scoffs. "Clearly Cheerilee is doing a poor job of teaching you if you don't know who I am."

"Enlighten me, then."

The mare raises an eyebrow.

"...Spoiled Rich. Head of the school board."

"Hm." Anon holds out a hand. "Anon. Full-time student, I guess."

Spoiled Rich stares at Anon's hand for a moment before scrunching up her nose in disgust, clearly having no intention of returning the greeting.

"Get that disgusting thing away from me. And get out of my schoolhouse. This is a meeting between civilized ponies, not... whatever you are."

"Excuse me?!"

Anon takes another step forward, but Cheerilee quickly steps in front of him.

"Anon, please." Her voice is low, but still loud enough for Spoiled to hear. "Just... just go, okay? We'll meet up again tomorrow."

"Ugh." Cheerilee turns around at the sound of Spoiled's vocalized disgust. "You're lucky this little arrangement comes from a direct order from Princess Celestia. Had it come from anywhere else, I promise you that the EEA would have shut this whole thing down. Equestrian education is for ponies only. They - we - are quite clear about that." Anon glares at Spoiled Rich. Cheerilee stares at the floor, too terrified to say anything. "Now then. I will not repeat myself." Spoiled looks Anon dead in the eyes. "Get. Out."

"..."

Anon and Spoiled stare at each other for an uncomfortable amount of time. Eventually, Anon is the one who backs down first. He quickly glances at Cheerilee, who cannot bear to look him in the eyes. Wordlessly, he exits the schoolhouse, not once looking back. The door slams behind him, and Spoiled lets out a cold chuckle.

"About time. This is no place for animals." A cocky smile on her face, Spoiled begins to slowly pace back and forth across the front of the room. "I've been hearing some troubling reports, Cheerilee."

"L-like what?"

"Children spouting nonsense about 'other cultures.' Three fillies running amok across town causing mayhem for the sake of their 'cutie marks.'" Spoiled stops directly in front of Cheerilee, unwaveringly staring directly at her. "My daughter coming home with ridiculous projects to complete. Projects that, may I remind you, are not compliant with EEA regulations."

"..."

"You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?"

"..."

"Speak up, Cheerilee. You're a grown mare."

"...Their grades have never been higher."

"Oh? Last I checked, it appeared that my Diamond no longer has the highest grade in her class."

"Well, yeah. Twist has a two-point lead in mathematics."

"Unacceptable!" Spoiled Rich's voice booms throughout the schoolhouse, and Cheerilee visibly cowers. "Diamond Tiara knows all there is to know about what it takes to succeed in a school accredited by the EEA. The only reason her grade is slipping is because of you! You, who thinks she can get away with breaking the rules set up specifically by the EEA. By me. Do I really need to remind you that I am on the EEA council as well? You didn't honestly believe I wouldn't catch on to your little scheme, did you?"

"..." Cheerilee takes a deep, shaky breath, though she is still unable to look Spoiled in the eyes. "Her grade isn't slipping. It's the highest it's ever been."

"And if it isn't the best, it may as well be the worst. And let me tell you, Cheerilee. She is the best. Do not forget that." Spoiled finally gets out of Cheerilee's face, slowly trotting past her. She speaks up once again, even as she faces away from Cheerilee. "We wouldn't want word of this to get out, would we? I mean, if anypony else in the EEA were to find out what you've been doing, little Ponyville would no longer have a school teacher."

"N-no! These students need their education!"

"I agree. You're lucky that the only one who knows about this is me. How generous I am to not inform my colleagues, as my position demands."

"..."

"Though, I wonder just how much my silence is worth to you. Hmm?"

Cheerilee's breathing grows even shakier. She trembles slightly in place, though whether or not Spoiled even notices is beyond her.

"P-please. I can't... I can't afford any more."

"Oh? You mean to tell me that Celestia isn't paying you to teach that... thing?" Cheerilee's eyes widen. "Hm. That's what I thought." Spoiled finally turns around again and starts to make her way towards the door, but she stops just before she reaches it. She turns her head to look at Cheerilee, who is barely holding herself together. "Oh, and Cheerilee?"

"What?"

"Diamond Tiara told me that you had your little pet project give a lecture in class." Spoiled turns yet again, approaching Cheerilee one final time. "On top of that, I had a talk with my old college friend, Berryshine. She told me you were getting quite intoxicated. In public. With your alien student." Cheerilee's blood runs cold as Spoiled gets even closer, her face directly in front of Cheerilee's own. "Not very becoming of an elementary school teacher. I may not be able to defy Princess Celestia's wishes, but all she asked of you was to mentor that cretin. He isn't anything more to you than an animal, a beast to be tamed. Am I clear?"

"..."

"Am. I. Clear?"

"...Yes." Cheerilee stares at the floor, doing her best to fight back tears. "He's just a side job. Our lessons are almost done, anyway. There's no need to worry about him, he won't be a bother for much longer."

Cheerilee finally looks up at Spoiled Rich. All of the emotion has been drained from her face. She no longer has the energy to be scared, or angry, or sad. Instead, she feels nothing at all. However, Cheerilee's attention is not focused on Spoiled for long.

"Very good." Cheerilee hadn't looked up the whole time their conversation was taking place, so she had failed to notice the shadow being cast beneath the door to the schoolhouse. Only now is she made aware of its presence as the shadow shifts to the side and disappears out of the doorway. Through a nearby window, she sees Anon walk away. He wears a scowl, but even from this distance, she can see the pain in his eyes. It's a look of sadness. Of anger. Of betrayal. "I'll see you at the next school board meeting. Do try not to be late on your payment this time, hmm?"

With a hearty laugh, Spoiled Rich finally exits the schoolhouse, just as Anon turns a distant corner and disappears out of sight. The door closes behind her, leaving Cheerilee all alone once again. A long, shaky breath escapes from her. Without Spoiled or Anon around, she no longer has to hold herself together. Immediately, tears begin to fall from her eyes. She slowly makes her way over to her desk, nearly stumbling as she takes a seat. She looks down at a pile of papers she needs to grade, but she cannot make out the words through her tears. With no other options, she simply buries her face in her hooves and quietly sobs as the setting sun slowly plunges the schoolhouse in darkness.

The Grand Galloping Gala

The first thing to breach Cheerilee's senses is the faint sound of knocking. The second thing is an intense, throbbing pain in her head. The third thing is an unrelenting feeling of hopelessness.

She forces her eyes open, the crustiness on both them and her cheeks indicating that she had cried herself to sleep. The pain in her head will not go away, to the point where her vision is blurry even after she rubs at her eyes. She groans as she attempts to sit up, only to realize that she already is. As her vision slowly begins to clear, she reaches out in front of her and realizes that she fell asleep sitting at her kitchen table. Her hoof bumps into something, which promptly falls to the floor. The sound of shattering glass fills her house, and she winces as she realizes what happened.

She drank herself into a stupor last night before apparently passing out at the table.

She licks her dry lips and attempts to stretch her back, feeling a painful pop as she does so. A quick glance to the side reveals that she has knocked her ever-growing pile of unpaid bills onto the floor, along with the letters from Spoiled Rich. She must have done so in her drunken state last night, of which she remembers very little. She starts to crawl out of her chair, but she stops herself as she realizes that the floor is now covered in the broken glass shards of what was once a bottle of wine. A quick scan of the kitchen reveals that she drank almost three whole bottles of the stuff. It's a miracle she isn't in the ER.

Now having carefully lowered herself to the ground while avoiding the glass, she immediately walks over to a nearby closet where she retrieves a broom and dustpan. As she starts to clean up the glass, a sound catches her attention. There is someone knocking at her door.

...Well, that explains what woke her up. Also, this is perhaps the worst possible time for her to have a visitor. A nearby clock shows that it's almost ten. She's lucky that it's a Saturday, otherwise she would be in a whole lot of trouble.

Doing her best to finish cleaning up the glass as quickly as she can, she shoves the broom and dustpan back into the closet and makes her way to the door. However, just before reaching it, she freezes, choosing instead to grab the two other bottles of wine and hide them behind her fridge before answering the door. In the process, she gets a quick look at herself in the reflection of a small mirror she has on her fridge. She looks like an absolute wreck.

Hastily trying (and failing) to fix her mane, she finally opens the door.

"Mornin', Lee- WOAH! What happened to you?"

To her surprise, it's Anon, the man she spoke poorly of the evening prior under just a bit of pressure from Spoiled Rich. Which he heard.

"If I may steal your line, it's none of your business."

"Well... can't argue with that!"

Cheerilee narrows her tired eyes at Anon. He's dressed impeccably well. He tends to dress nicer than most thanks to Rarity's influence, but today he looks... well, to be frank, charming. The pink tie is a bit different for him, though. She didn't really think pink was his color, but what does she know about fashion?

However, as she looks closer, she notices something else. Dark circles are faintly gathering beneath his eyes. He has a bit of a slouch, too. If she had to guess, she'd say that he didn't get any sleep last night. On top of that, he carries a large, flat piece of what looks like black canvas in his arms.

"What are you doing here? It's not time for our lesson yet."

"I... huh?" Anon tilts his head at Cheerilee for a moment before his eyes open a bit wider, his expression indicating that he just realized something. "Oh! Oh my gosh, I cannot believe you forgot what today is."

"Is today something special?"

"Well, I was under the impression that it's going to be one of the most important nights of your life, but I mean, if you'd rather not go to the gala, I'm not making you~!"

Anon looks to the side with a cheeky smile. Cheerilee's ears droop and her eyes widen as his words finally register with her. Amongst everything that has been going on lately, she had completely forgotten.

Oh this is bad.

"I... I... I'm not ready! Oh sweet Celestia, I'm not ready!"

"Calm down, Lee. Our train doesn't leave for another couple of hours."

"Then why did you come over so early?"

"We'll just blame it on my intuition. I, er, figured something like this would happen."

"Something like what, exactly?"

"That you would be woefully unprepared for the gala."

"I would really love to argue with you, but I guess my words wouldn't carry much weight when I look like this."

"No, no they wouldn't. Now, what do you need to do to get ready?"

"Well, let me think." In truth, she has no idea. She is so unprepared for this that she's not sure how much she can do. She can't afford to get her mane done, she doesn't have time to doll herself up as she'd like... heck, she doesn't even own a formal dress. This is going to be a disaster, isn't it? "I need to fix my mane, I suppose. Grab my ticket... er..."

"You don't have a plan, do you?"

"You know me so well."

"Luckily for you, I was prepared for that too."

"I honestly don't know whether I should be flattered or offended."

"Both would be funny. Anyway, here."

Anon hands the flat whatever-it-is to Cheerilee, who only now notices that there is a zipper going down the center of it.

"What is it?"

She asks that question as she unzips it, but the answer makes itself known before Anon says a word. As it turns out, it's a bag for protecting formal clothing, and within that bag lies a jaw-droppingly gorgeous pink-and-green dress. She stares at the garment with wide eyes, unable to find the right words to convey what she's thinking.

"Rarity said she already had your measurements, so unless you've gained weight or something it should fit just fine."

"What a way to ruin the moment!" Cheerilee kicks Anon in the shin, but it isn't enough to hurt. He simply chuckles as he watches her eyes begin to grow misty. "This... Anon, I can't accept this."

"Sure you can. It's a gift. Besides, you're my date, aren't you? Plus, I got a matching tie!"

"S-since when am I your date?"

"Is that not implied by you being my plus one?"

"Aren't your friends bringing their friends and family? Those aren't dates!"

"Sure, but I'm bringing you. I suppose we could refer to it as a more casual sort of thing if you'd like, but that doesn't make my tie match your dress any less."

"Enough about the tie!" Cheerilee fights back tears as she cannot bear to look away from the dress in her hooves. Never in her entire life, even prior to Spoiled Rich's interference, could she ever afford something this nice. "How did you even get this?"

"I called in a favor from Rarity."

"How did you-"

"I did her taxes for her."

"W... what? How? You've only been in Equestria for a couple of months."

"So? Turns out, my degree was good for something. I just had to get the bit conversion rate lined up in my head and then it was all second nature."

"I..." Cheerilee cannot think of anything else to say. Instead, she throws herself at Anon, wrapping a hoof around his waist as best she can in the closest approximation to a hug she can manage given their height difference. "I guess I'll go put this on."

"Woah, hold on there. The dress is the last thing you need to put on."

"I'm sorry?" Anon reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small, silver ticket before handing it to her. "What is this?"

"A voucher to the spa. They'll get you all sorted out. Pretty sure Lotus can even do your mane for ya."

"I can't-"

"Shut up and go, Lee." She looks up at Anon, who gives her a knowing smile. "Gotta look your best when your dream is coming true, right?"

"But you... aren't you mad at me?"

"Hm? What for?"

"..." Did he not actually hear what happened yesterday? She wants to breathe a sigh of relief, but she'd feel bad if she did. Either he did hear what she said and he's playing dumb for her sake, or he didn't and she's hiding the fact that she talked smack about him behind his back. Either way, she's unsure of how to respond. "Never mind. Th-thank you, Anon. Truly. Nopony has ever done something like this for me before."

"There's a first for everything, right? Even an old mare like you needs some love." Before she can make a retort to his playful jab, he's already pulling her out the door. "Now come on, I know I said we have a couple of hours but we're still on the clock."

"Are you going to the spa, too?"

"Nah, I have some errands of my own to take care of. You enjoy yourself, okay?"

"R-right."

"We'll meet up at the train station before noon." Anon begins to walk away, but instead of his usual half-hearted wave goodbye, he turns around to face her as he walks backwards. "And don't forget your ticket! That would be a really predictable and avoidable problem!"

"Okay!"

Cheerilee is struggling to handle the whirlwind of emotions she's feeling at the moment. Her head hurts, she's tired, and her life may as well be crumbling around her. And yet, here she is, dress in hoof, about to get pampered at the spa and then taken to the gala of her dreams.

What else can she do but smile?

"Woah." Anon looks at Cheerilee with surprise as she approaches him at the train station. He wasn't kidding when he said the spa would get her sorted out. She got cleaned up, got a massage to wash away her fatigue, got her mane done, and she even got a hooficure. After that, she stopped by her house to try on the dress. Sure enough, it fits perfectly. She got a good look at herself in a mirror before she left, and the sight alone was enough to make her blush. The dress clings to her figure in all the right ways, and the color matches her coat and her eyes in a way that make both seem even more lovely than before. Never in her life has she ever felt so... "You look beautiful."

Yeah. That.

"I feel different, that's for sure."

"Got your ticket?"

"Right here."

Cheerilee shows Anon her ticket, which was tucked away in one of her dress pockets.

Yup. That's right. Her dress has pockets.

"Good. I already got our train tickets, so we're good to board."

He gives her a smile before taking a few steps towards the train and motioning for her to enter before him. She does, giving him a sly elbow before completely passing him by. With that, the two finally get on the train and make their way to their designated car. Along the way, they pass a few other ponies that are also dressed well. Not all of them are going to the gala, of course, but some most certainly are. And yet, each and every one has their eyes drawn to Cheerilee. There can be no mistake: She looks gorgeous.

Eventually, they make it to where they are supposed to be. There are a fair amount of ponies in this car as well, but they easily find their seats. Among the ponies sitting around them, Cheerilee recognizes several. Specifically, she recognizes Twilight Sparkle and her friends, who are right next to the pair.

"Hello, Anon! Hello, Ms. Cheerilee!" Twilight greets them with a smile. Her mane is done up as well, and she has a beautiful dress that compliments her features perfectly. And yet, it somehow still doesn't quite compare to Cheerilee's despite being made by the same pony. "Both of you look wonderful!"

"Thanks, Twi." Cheerilee glances at Anon. Seems like Twilight has reached that elusive nickname status he told her about. "You're all looking good, too."

"Well, Rarity did work really hard on our dresses."

"Speaking of!" Rarity, who sits next to Twilight, excitedly looks at Cheerilee with sparkles in her eyes. "I'm so happy to see that it fits you, darling. I must say, it was by far the greatest challenge I had to face going into this gala. But, after Anon told me about how excited you were, I knew I could give you nothing less than my absolute best work possible."

"G-goodness, I didn't realize it was so much of a hassle." Cheerilee blushes as she speaks.

"Not at all, darling! It was a very enjoyable challenge, and I am quite proud of the result."

"Thank you, Rarity. Really."

"You're very welcome! Ooo, I'm just so excited about tonight!"

After that, the group begins to converse about their expectations for the night to come. Twilight and her friends seem very adamant about tempering said expectations, and they advise Cheerilee to do the same. Granted, Cheerilee is older than them and feels like she has a better idea of what to expect, but hey, what does she know? Meanwhile, Anon stays quiet, silently grinning as his attention continues to be split between the group and the landscape outside the train's windows.

"Hey. Anon." Cheerilee keeps her voice low in an attempt to prevent the others from hearing her.

"Hm? What's up?"

"You're doing that thing you do when there's something on your mind."

"Am I?"

"Staring wistfully out the window while acting uncharacteristically quiet?"

"...Well, you got me there."

"Something on your mind?"

"I'm, er... I'm just not really looking forward to meeting with Celestia."

"Haven't you met her before?"

"Sure, but only briefly. Plus, Twilight did most of the talking for me. This is the first time I'll be around her for a prolonged period of time, and I'll be all on my own. Well, save for the untold amount of nobles that she plans to 'show me off' to."

"Princess Celestia is beloved for a reason, Anon. I don't think you have anything to worry about."

Anon hesitates for a moment as he stares out the window, his attention never directly geared towards Cheerilee.

"We'll see."

The two say nothing more as the train enters Canterlot. It gradually slows until coming to a complete stop at the train station, and the passengers are directed off of it one-by-one. Anon and Cheerilee walk side-by-side with bated breath as they slowly make their way across the grand city towards the castle that looms over all of Equestria. As they walk, Cheerilee notices how many looks the two of them are getting. Not only is she not the typical sort of high-class pony to attend an event like this, but Anon's human form sticks out like a sore thumb. The fact that he is essentially acting as her escort doesn't help matters. However, not even that can quell the growing excitement within her stomach as they slowly make their way across the small drawbridge and into the castle.

The Grand Galloping Gala has begun.

What I've Learned

The castle is vibrant and beautiful. The murmurs of the well-dressed, well-mannered crowd prevent the space from growing too quiet, and there are ponies as far as the eye can see. The large corridors and marble rooms are flawlessly decorated for the occasion, and the atmosphere itself feels high-class. In a way, it's almost stifling.

"Well?"

Anon nudges Cheerilee as he looks down at her. She seems completely mesmerized by the gala, and her jaw is slightly agape.

"It's even bigger than I imagined."

"That's what she said."

"Can you go ten seconds without ruining the moment?"

"Not when you're around." Anon gives Cheerilee a sly wink before walking further into the castle. "Come on, let's get the night started."

"Oh? You sound like you know where you're going," she says as she hastily follows behind him.

"I do. Well, I know where I'M going. What you do is entirely up to you."

"Wait, we're not sticking together?"

Anon doesn't respond. Instead, he guides Cheerilee around a particularly large crowd of ponies before nodding towards the back of the room. She follows his nod and sees a large staircase, upon which Celestia stands. She doesn't get a chance to see the princess all that often, and the regal aura she exudes is almost breathtaking. She stands much taller than the average pony, her alicorn form is downright majestic, and her dress is probably the fanciest thing Cheerilee has ever seen. One glance is all anyone would ever need to know that she is the ruler of Equestria. At the moment, she appears to be occupying herself by greeting the many nobles and other gala attendees who approach her, one at a time. Cheerilee looks down the steps and realizes exactly what the massive crowd in this room is: It's the line to greet Celestia. A formality, if she had to guess, but an honor nonetheless.

"Well. I guess I'd better get this over with."

"Oh, you're meeting with her now?"

"She didn't tell me when to do so, and I'd like to be done with it as soon as possible."

"A-alright."

Cheerilee's voice is hesitant, and Anon doesn't fail to pick up on it. He gives her a smile before kneeling down a bit to meet her at eye level.

"You go enjoy the gala, alright? I can't guarantee that we'll get a chance to do this again, so go live out your dream!"

"Trust me, I plan to. I... er..."

Anon chuckles.

"I'll go find you as soon as I'm done. I wouldn't want to leave my date alone all night, would I?"

He gives Cheerilee a nod as she playfully shoves him away with a smile.

"Alright, alright. Go let the princess show you off, Mr. Fancypants."

"I'm pretty sure Mr. Fancypants is in line, actually."

"Th-that's not-! Ugh, you're impossible sometimes. Go!"

Cheerilee pushes Anon in the direction of the line, causing him to laugh. Meanwhile, she steps away from the crowd and does her best to make herself scarce. However, she does not leave. Instead, she finds a quiet corner and watches on with curious eyes. How exactly will Anon, the human with some of the worst manners she's even seen, deal with Princess Celestia herself?

Those curious eyes of hers immediately go wide as she watches Anon ignore the line completely. He walks right around the crowd, which looks at him first with interest, then disdain, then anger. More than a few angry grumbles can be heard, but none dare raise their voice in front of Celestia. Sure enough, after a few moments Anon reaches the bottom of the stairs and begins climbing them before the mare being greeted by Celestia is finished. The princess smiles at the mare, causing her to walk away just in time for Anon to take her place. The customary thing to do would be to bow in front of Celestia, and perhaps kiss the back of her hoof. Anon does no such thing, opting instead to stand even straighter than he was before to meet her at eye level (despite being a couple of steps below her). His sharp eyes meet her own, and he smiles a wicked smile as if challenging her authority directly. The crowd gasps and waits for Celestia's response with bated breath. However, she seems to take no offense to this. In fact, her own eyes narrow ever so slightly as a similar-looking smile makes its way to her face. From this distance, Cheerilee can tell that they are exchanging words, but they appear to be whispering to each other on purpose, so she has no clue what they are actually saying. After a few moments, much to the surprise of the crowd, Anon ascends the last couple of steps and stands directly next to the princess, looking out at the crowd much like she is. When they're standing on even ground, he's easily a couple of heads taller than her. Frankly, if it weren't for the fact that she is centered on the steps, one might assume that he is the focal point here.

Cheerilee watches in complete disbelief as Celestia motions for the next pony to approach. It's an older stallion, though his outfit and demeanor make it clear that he is another of Canterlot's elite. He bows before the princess and kisses the back of her hoof. Afterwards, they exchange more words Cheerilee cannot hear before he looks up at Anon, who gives him a completely informal nod of acknowledgement and says absolutely nothing. Celestia gives him a strange, almost knowing side-eye as the stallion walks away before allowing the next pony to approach.

Anon is going to die, isn't he?

Cheerilee stands by the refreshments table, doing her best to take up as little space as possible. She followed Anon's suggestion and explored the gala. In a way, it's everything she ever dreamed it would be. It's bright, it's fancy, it's grand, and it's almost overwhelming. However, in many other ways, she can't help but feel... well, "disappointed" isn't quite the word she's looking for.

She takes a sip of her drink. It's got a bit of alcohol in it, sure, and she's likely never going to get to try something this expensive ever again. However, it simply doesn't taste very good. To be honest, the only reason she hasn't thrown it away yet is out of embarrassment. Is it a faux pas to throw away a drink without finishing it at a place like this? She doesn't know, but she isn't willing to risk it.

Speaking of, that's her biggest problem. Her whole life, when she imagined coming to the Grand Galloping Gala, she always pictured herself among the nobility. Among the Wonderbolts. Among the princesses. She imaged herself as somepony that actually matters.

All she feels now is out of place.

Sure, she's gotten a few looks. A lot of looks, actually. It seems that Anon wasn't lying; she does look beautiful tonight. Heck, a few ponies have even tried to start a conversation with her, apparently enamored by the "mystery mare." However, once she told them that she was an elementary school teacher from Ponyville, they all quickly lost interest. She's starting to wonder if all those stereotypes about rich folk are true.

That discomfort permeates through every part of the gala. Over the past couple of hours, no matter where she went, she was always hesitant to actually try to do anything. She doesn't want to dance for fear of attracting attention to herself. The food is beyond her palate. The other ponies aren't exactly approachable either, save for Twilight and her friends. But even then, she's not quite sure what she'd say to them. Why go all the way to the Grand Galloping Gala just to talk to ponies she could see whenever she wants back at home?

Cheerilee sighs. Is she wasting what little time she has here? Ugh. Maybe this wasn't what she wanted, after all.

Suddenly, she freezes. She isn't exactly sure why, but the air around her suddenly feels tense. She feels her ears twitch as time seems to slow down. She looks around herself. She can still see everypony just fine, happily socializing with each other and enjoying the party. However, to her, it's like all sound has suddenly ceased. She feels her breathing grow slightly ragged, just as a voice finally graces her ears. It comes from directly behind her, each word cold and angry.

And it's the last voice she ever wanted to hear.

"Cheerilee."

She doesn't move. Despite the volume of the gala, she can hear the hoofsteps of the mare behind her, each one like a cannon going off in her mind. The mare slowly circles around Cheerilee, coming to stop directly in front of her and looking her in the eyes. She gulps.

"Spoiled Rich."

Spoiled Rich glares at her with a mixture of disbelief and rage.

"That's Mrs. Rich to you." Spoiled narrows her eyes at Cheerilee, the quiet fury present within them proving to be more than enough to send a chill down Cheerilee's spine. "And just what do you think you're doing here?"

Cheerilee tries to clear her throat, but her voice still cracks when she speaks.

"I-I got a ticket. Same as you."

"How? It makes perfect sense for a mare such as myself to attend a gala like this, but who in Equestria do you think you are? This is a gathering of the most important ponies in the country, and I promise you that you are NOT on that list."

Cheerilee steels herself for what is about to happen.

"B-be that as it may, I still have a ticket."

She produces the ticket from one of her dress pockets, which Spoiled immediately snatches from her and begins inspecting.

"Hah! A plus one?! I knew you wouldn't be invited to an event like this."

"But... aren't you Mr. Rich's plus one?"

Spoiled's face immediately goes red, and she forcefully gives Cheerilee back her ticket. Cheerilee stuffs it back into her pocket as her gaze falls to the floor.

"That's irrelevant!" Spoiled clears her throat in a much more dignified manner than Cheerilee had before continuing. "And where did you even get... that?"

Spoiled points at Cheerilee's dress, and Cheerilee notes that Spoiled's isn't nearly as well-made as her own.

"R-Rarity made it for me. I'm very appreciative of-"

"And how exactly did you afford it?!"

"I... I'm sorry?"

"I know you don't have-!" Spoiled's eyes go wide for just a moment before she composes herself once more. "I was under the impression that you didn't have that kind of money."

"It was a gift."

"A gift?! Hah!" Spoiled grabs the bottom of Cheerilee's dress and pulls on it, forcefully bringing Cheerilee even closer to her as she inspects it. "Not even I can deny that it's an incredible dress. Too bad it's wasted on the likes of you."

"..."

Cheerilee stays silent, afraid of what might happen if she were to voice her thoughts right now. This is quite possibly tonight's worst-case scenario, and it's playing out right in front of her. All her life, she dreamed of going to the Grand Galloping Gala. Now, she wishes she could be literally anywhere else.

"Go home, Cheerilee." Cheerilee finally looks back up at Spoiled. She's breathless as she tries to process Spoiled's words. "...Well? You heard me."

"I... I don't have any reason to leave yet."

"Of course you do. I'm tired of peasants like you dirtying the sanctity of this gala, and I want you gone. That should be all the reason you need." Spoiled leans in extremely close, her face mere inches away from Cheerilee's as her voice turns to a hushed whisper. "Heck, I may as well raise your 'rate' while I'm at it. Since you can get your hooves on a dress like this without much issue, I suppose paying a bit more won't be a problem either."

"No... please..."

"Now get out before I march right over to Chancellor Neighsay. He's here too, you know."

Cheerilee feels tears beginning to fill her eyes. What can she even say in a situation like this? What could she reasonably do except give in to Spoiled's demands? Of course, even if she does, she could never hope to afford another increase in her payments. No matter what she does, she's done for.

And as she comes to this realization, she feels her vision begin to grow blurry. It's all just too much.

She can't take it anymore.

...

"Get away from her."

Cheerilee suddenly snaps back to her senses. She looks up to see Spoiled still standing in front of her, but she isn't the only one there. Towering above Spoiled is Anon, who stands directly behind her with his arms crossed. A quiet fury is evident on his face, and Spoiled's frustration only seems to grow as she turns around to greet the new arrival.

"Ugh! Who let you in here?!"

"Princess Celestia."

Spoiled Rich's eyes go wide, though they appear no less angry than before.

"Wh-what?!"

"I was invited by the princess herself. Since Cheerilee is my plus one, you could say the same is true for her. If you have a problem with that..." Anon bends over to get his face right into Spoiled's, much like she typically does to Cheerilee. "You're free to take it up with Celestia."

"I..." Spoiled attempts to clear her throat again, but much like Cheerilee, she utterly fails and causes her voice to crack when she speaks. "I trust the princess's decisions. I will say no more on the matter."

Spoiled attempts to walk away, but Anon moves to block her path. His arms are still crossed, and Cheerilee looks on with shock and confusion. She's seen Anon in many different contexts. Heck, she's seen him absolutely livid before. And yet, never has she seen him speak with such clarity and conviction as he is doing now.

It makes her heart skip a beat.

"Oh, but I have plenty to say on the matter." Spoiled practically snarls at Anon, but he doesn't back down. "Do you recall the last time we met?"

"Peh, barely. I have little reason to remember such trifle matters."

"Well, you indicated to me that I should know who you are."

"Of course you should! I am a member of the Rich family, the most important family in Ponyville!"

"I won't deny your family's importance, nor their integrity." Anon narrows his eyes as his mouth contorts into a cocky, almost devious smile. "But I will question yours."

"Excuse me?!"

"I did exactly as you asked. I looked into your family. Well, to be precise, I looked into you specifically. So I could 'know who you are,' of course."

"Tsk. And where are you going with this?"

Anon stares at Spoiled for a moment before reaching into his suit. From somewhere inside, he produces an unmarked, tan-colored folder filled with a few papers. He hands the folder to Spoiled, who briefly recoils before snatching the folder from him and looking at its contents.

"I have to say, for a mare who is listed as a 'school board member' and an 'EEA official,' you sure seem to make a lot of money. I mean, those are lucrative jobs, but these numbers still don't line up."

"Wh-why do you have these?!"

"Financial records are public in Equestria." Anon turns to Cheerilee and winks. "That's something I learned not too long ago. Surely there's no issue with me looking into yours?"

"O-of course there is! Aren't I entitled to a bit of privacy?"

"Officially, no. You're not."

Spoiled Rich scoffs.

"Peh. I suppose I'll need to speak to Mayor Mare when I get home. It sounds to me like some policies need changing. At least then I'll be able to keep nosy little brats like you out of my business."

"Ooo, nice threat. I'm almost impressed. However, it falls flat considering that you aren't actually going to follow through with it."

"And how can you be so sure I won't? Trust me, beast." Spoiled's voice drops, sounding almost growl-like. "I have more influence than you could ever dream of."

"And I have the mystical power of not giving a shit." A few nearby ponies, who were clearly listening in on the conversation, gasp at Anon's audacity, Spoiled herself included. "Besides, that would be a detriment to you, wouldn't it? I mean, how could you possibly hope to spy on Cheerilee's income if her records weren't public?"

Spoiled's eyes go wide. She makes a strange grunting noise as if she had a retort ready but lost it when Anon caught her off guard.

"E-excuse me?! How DARE you make such an inflammatory claim?!"

"Mayor Mare didn't have any qualms with telling me that you look at Cheerilee's records almost monthly."

"That good-for-nothing...!"

"Actually, I was interested in her records myself."

Now it's Cheerilee's turn to look at Anon in shock.

"Why would you want to look at my file?!"

"Well, I overhead an interesting conversation the other day." Anon smirks as he begins to circle around Spoiled, much like she tends to do to Cheerilee. "Putting aside the derogatory remarks made about me, I couldn't help but hear some hushed whispers about payments. Payments that sounded a lot like blackmail, mind you. And I will admit," he says, loud enough for anypony nearby to hear, "I haven't been in Equestria for very long. But even I know that blackmail is very illegal."

"Your accusations have gone far enough!" Spoiled glares at Anon with fury, sweat beginning to form on her brow. "You have no proof that I have been doing anything of the sort!"

Anon's smirk disappears as his expression goes cold. It's enough to make both Spoiled and Cheerilee freeze in place. Slowly, he reaches into his suit and pulls out another folder.

"Don't I?" Anon continues his slow circling of Spoiled, ensuring that she doesn't move from where she's standing. "These are Cheerilee's records. It says here that her monthly expenses have been going up lately. On top of that, they're way, way higher than they should be considering typical Ponyville living expenses. Curiously, that difference is listed under the 'miscellaneous' section. Strange, wouldn't you agree?"

"I... I don't see how that has anything to do with me."

"Well, why don't we take a look at your records then?"

Now appearing quite distressed, Spoiled clutches the folder containing her records close to her chest.

"I don't think you'll be doing anything of the sort!"

"Oh, that's fine." Anon's smile returns as he reaches into his suit a third time, producing yet another folder. "I brought more than one copy." Spoiled looks like she is about to throw up as Anon opens the folder. "Now, let's see here. As we briefly discussed earlier, you're making quite a bit of money. And I will admit, most of that clearly comes from your family. However, some of it still can't be directly traced." Anon clicks his tongue. "It's that pesky 'miscellaneous' section again. What a strange way to categorize a source of income. Of course, if you hadn't listed the income at all, I'm sure Equestria's tax services would have loved to have had a word with you." Anon glances at Cheerilee again, who just watches on wordlessly. "Regardless, I thought that number looked familiar." Anon chuckles. "Well, I won't beat around the bush any longer. Spoiled, you've been mysteriously making the same amount of money Cheerilee has been mysteriously losing. Between that and what I overheard at the schoolhouse... well, it would be remiss of me to not give you a chance to explain."

Spoiled opens her mouth to speak, but she begins to stutter. She's red in the face, and clearly becoming drenched in sweat rather quickly. Cheerilee doesn't know quite what to say or what to do. All she can do is watch on as Anon continues questioning the mare that has tormented her for moons. As she waits for Spoiled to respond, however, she makes note of something that Spoiled does not. The room has grown almost completely silent. Both the music and the voices have stopped. Nearly all eyes are on them, and those that aren't waiting for Spoiled's response are looking at the pair of ponies approaching her from behind.

"Th... this proves nothing! How dare you accuse a Rich of such a thing?! I don't care what Celestia says, you will never see the light of day again when I am done with you! Do you understand me?!" Spoiled is now yelling, her voice echoing throughout the large, quiet room. However, her tirade does not stop as her attention now turns from Anon to Cheerilee. "And YOU! You can be certain that Chancellor Neighsay will be hearing about this!"

"About what, exactly?"

Spoiled's eyes go wide as her heart drops. Slowly, she turns to face the stallion that just spoke. Anon smiles a cocky smile, and Cheerilee just watches silently as two ponies make their presence known. From behind Spoiled Rich, Princess Celestia and Chancellor Neighsay stand side-by-side, their faces serious and cold.

"Ch... Ch... Chancellor Neighsay?"

"I heard everything, Mrs. Rich. If I were you, I'd avoid making an even bigger fool of myself than I already have." His voice is cold and commanding, spoken with a confidence only a pony of his stature could produce. "Princess Celestia and... he already told me everything, anyway." Neighsay speaks with disdain when referring to Anon, which Cheerilee doesn't fail to catch. "And while I will admit that I have more than a few reservations about his presence at this gala, I trust Princess Celestia's judgement. Besides, I am much more concerned with you at the moment."

"M-me?"

"Your actions are an embarrassment to the EEA. In the past, Ponyville has produced some of Equestria's best and brightest ponies. Their education is to be treated with the utmost care. You, it seems, have been taking measures to circumvent that."

"I... I have done no such thing."

"Really? Because from what I hear, the policies that we introduced not too long ago proved to be greatly detrimental to the health of both students and teachers across Equestria. Policies that, may I remind you, were put into place at your insistence."

"A-and those policies work."

"No, Mrs. Rich. No they do not." Neighsay looks over at Cheerilee. He carries a naturally cold and oppressive demeanor, but he looks at her with genuine kindness. "Ms. Cheerilee here has proved that."

"W-wait, so you knew she was breaking the rules?!"

"Nothing gets by the EEA, Mrs. Rich. You should know that by now. And if it weren't for your position, you wouldn't have gotten by us, either." Neighsay closes his eyes and raises his voice, apparently preparing to make a point for all to hear. "And as such, you are hereby fired. You are never to work alongside the EEA again." Spoiled's lip quivers. For the first time in her life, she's at a complete loss of words. Cheerilee can hardly believe what she is seeing, and she almost smiles until Neighsay looks back at her. "And as for you, Ms. Cheerilee. I am aware of your past deeds. However, thanks to your part in finding this... rat amongst us, as well as the flawed nature of our recent choices, we are choosing to overlook them." Neighsay smiles, which is a rare sight to behold. "Please continue to be the excellent teacher you always were. It's no coincidence that you're Ponyville's only teacher."

Cheerilee looks back at Neighsay for what feels like an eternity as tears slowly start to fall from her eyes. Eventually, she finds her voice again.

"O-of course, Chancellor Neighsay!"

She courteously bows her head. Meanwhile, Anon strolls up alongside her, his arms still crossed and a smile still on his face. However, he says nothing. Instead, it is Celestia who finally speaks up.

"Now, then. EEA business aside, I believe we have other matters to attend to, Mrs. Rich."

"O... other matters?"

"Blackmail is a crime. Surely you were taught that in school?" Spoiled has no words, and she puts up no fight as two members of the Royal Guard approach her from the rear. "Now, why don't you do as these fine stallions say? They have a few questions for you. Outside the gala, that is."

"W-what?! You can't do this to me!"

Spoiled continues to fruitlessly make claims about herself as she is escorted away by the Royal Guard. Her voice can still be heard in the quiet room up until they turn a corner and make their way outside the castle. Once they are gone, Celestia and Neighsay turn their attention towards Anon and Cheerilee. To Cheerilee's shock, Celestia bows before her.

"Ms. Cheerilee. I cannot apologize enough for how you've been treated."

"P-Princess Celestia, please! You don't need to bow for a pony like me!"

"I must disagree. You've suffered long enough, and only because of my failures as a ruler. If even one creature in Equestria is unhappy, then I'm not doing my job well enough." Celestia rises once more, a warm, apologetic smile on her face. "I hope I will be able to make it up to you one day."

"Y-you don't need to do that. Just... not being extorted is good enough for me."

"Hmhm. Then you may consider thanking Anon, here. This was all his idea." Celestia winks at Anon. "And it was quite bold of you to propose such an idea right there on the steps in front of everypony. You didn't even bow."

Anon laughs.

"Well, I've never really been one for tact, and you hadn't earned my respect yet."

"Oh? Past tense?"

"...I may be reconsidering my opinion of you."

"Haha! I'm glad I could make such an impression."

Chancellor Neighsay clears his throat before looking at Anon. His expression is serious, and it's just as cold as when he was confronting Spoiled Rich.

"I stand by the EEA's opinion that Equestrian education is for ponies only. However, it seems like Ms. Cheerilee has already taught you everything you need to know." Neighsay closes his eyes and lets out a resolute sigh. "So long as you stay out of trouble, the EEA will not bother you. But we will be keeping an eye on you."

"Chancellor Neighsay, is that really necessary?" Celestia's voice is soft and gentle.

"It's alright, princess." Anon smiles, but rather than the cocky demeanor he had before, he carries a certain warmth and sincerity that Cheerilee has only seen behind closed doors. "I'll be on my best behavior."

Celestia sighs.

"Very well, then." She looks up at the room around them. Immediately, the many onlookers go right back to their own business, and the space is filled with voices and music once more. "I suppose we should be getting back to the gala. Please, enjoy the evening! You are my guests, after all."

With a smile and a chuckle, Celestia turns and walks away with Neighsay trailing behind her. Anon turns to Cheerilee, who looks back up at him with a mixture of emotions on her face. What is she supposed to be feeling right now? So much has happened in such a short span of time, she's not sure if she can process it all. What should she say? What should she do? What should-

"Hey, Lee. Want to go get some air?"

"H-huh?"

"Over in the garden. You know, I've heard it's awfully beautiful out there."

"...Y-yes. I think I'd like that."

With a smile, Anon offers Cheerilee his hand. She looks at it with confusion for a moment before locking eyes with him, prompting him to give her a big, toothy grin. She hesitantly places her hoof in his hand, and the two slowly make their way through the gala and towards the gardens of Canterlot Castle.

Dancing in the Dark

The air outside is pleasantly cool. There is a gentle breeze causing the many bushes and trees of the royal gardens to lightly sway, and the sound of their leaves and branches brushing up against one-another creates a peaceful atmosphere. Compared to the gala going on inside, it's downright relaxing out here.

Anon and Cheerilee walk through the gardens, neither knowing quite what to say. Occasionally, one will open their mouth to speak or glance at the other, but nothing will come of it. Both wear expressions indicative of their mixed emotions, but despite their lack of communication, there isn't any tension between them. Neither are purposefully hesitating to speak, they just don't know where to start.

Eventually, they come across a well-maintained wooden bench. Cheerilee stops in front of it, prompting Anon to do the same.

"We've been standing ever since we got off the train. I think I'd like to rest my hooves."

"Yeah, that seems like a good idea."

Cheerilee happily places herself onto the bench. Anon sits next to her, but it immediately becomes clear that, like most furniture in Equestria, this bench was made with ponies in mind, so it's uncomfortably low to the ground for him. The two sit like that for a while, their awkward silence continuing for what feels like an eternity. However, Cheerilee finally ends up breaking the silence by briefly clearing her throat.

"I... ugh. Look, I don't really know how to..."

"You don't need to say anything, Lee."

"Thank you."

She turns to look directly at Anon, and he looks back at her with a straight face.

"Really, you don't-"

"I do." Her voice is resolute. Confident. "If you hadn't shown up when you did, she would have raised the amount she was charging me for her silence even more. I can't cut any more corners to make ends meet, Anon. I just can't."

"Well, you no longer have to. Spoiled Bitch is out of the picture, right?"

Cheerilee sighs.

"For the most part, yes. I can't imagine that this is the last I'll ever see of her, but if I'm lucky, she'll think twice about pulling something like that again. So... yeah. Words can't really express my gratitude."

"Well, it's not like I had the authority to do anything. That was all Celestia. And Neighsay I guess, but I hate that guy so I'd rather not dwell on him."

Cheerilee laughs out loud, catching Anon off guard. She has been tense almost all night, so it's nice to see her loosen up like this.

"But you told them about me. You were the one who dug into my personal business. If I weren't so grateful, I'd smack you upside the head for that."

"If you didn't want me digging around, you shouldn't have told me it was legal to do so!"

"I shouldn't have to... ugh!"

True to her word, she smacks him upside the head. It isn't hard enough to hurt though, and they both quickly find themselves laughing once more.

"By the by, I've been meaning to ask you: How did you end up getting blackmailed to begin with?"

"Anon, I've told you before, it's none of your... well. I suppose there's no harm in sharing anymore."

"If you'd rather not, don't force yourself."

"No no, you deserve this much." Cheerilee takes a deep breath as she prepares to share her story. "Do you remember Snips?"

"The colt with the orange mane? Scissors for a cutie mark?"

"Yeah, him. Well, I accidentally got him hurt."

"How so?"

Cheerilee hesitates for a moment and tilts her head backwards. The night sky is crystal clear, and she decides to recall her tale while gazing at the stars. Anon follows her lead and does the same as he waits for her to speak.

"It was right after the EEA put those regulations into place. The students were really confused about why all of the 'fun parts' of school were no longer allowed. They were upset, and frankly, they were right to be. Children learn in all sorts of ways, and you can't just shove them all behind a desk, put standardized tests in front of them, and expect all of them to succeed. Some may be fine, sure. Heck, they might even prefer it. But no two children are alike. The EEA... or, I suppose I should say Spoiled Rich, tried to justify the decision by saying that it puts all the students on an even playing field. Really, it did exactly the opposite."

"..."

"Anyway, the days kept coming. The students were getting more and more desensitized to school. Meanwhile, those new regulations meant that I had a whole lot more paperwork to do. I'll tell you what, spending all day teaching students just to go home and spend all night preparing for the next day takes a lot out of you. Then, when you do go back to school, the children don't even want to be there. I do what I do because I want to help them learn and grow, but... well, when they aren't passionate, it's hard for me to be passionate. It doesn't help that their grades were slipping across the board, too."

"I imagine that must have been soul sucking."

"You don't know the half of it. My workload was basically tripled, my desire to work plummeted, and my sleep schedule was fucked. I may as well have been a walking corpse."

"You weren't much better when I met you."

"I was even worse, but we'll get to that. Anyway, I eventually threw in the towel. 'Screw it,' I thought. 'I'm gonna teach these kids in a way that makes sense to them!' So, I took them on a field trip."

"Where to?"

"The Everfree Forest."

"W-wait. Isn't that, like, one of the most dangerous places in Equestria?"

"We didn't go into the forest, of course. We just observed it from the outside." Cheerilee sighs deeply, but she doesn't look away from the stars. "At least, that was the plan. I neglected to pay as much attention to the students as I should have. I was giving my lecture, pointing out specific trees and sections of the forest, when Snips and Snails sneaked away from me, right through the treeline."

"I don't like where this is going."

"Good, because it ends exactly how you think it does. It took me just a bit too long to realize that they were gone. As soon as I did I raced into the forest after them, of course. By the time I reached them, they had already experienced a run-in with some of the local fauna. Snails was fine, but Snips... he had a big gash down his back. There was... a lot of blood. I remember it so clearly."

"Wait, but he seemed fine to me when you had me act as a guest speaker?"

"It turned out to be treatable, thank Celestia. But that doesn't erase the fact that it happened."

"Lee, you shouldn't blame yourself for-"

"Yes, I should!" She finally looks down from the night sky and gazes directly into Anon's eyes, a serious expression on her face. "And I don't mean that in a 'woe-is-me' kind of way, either. I am his teacher. I was his chaperone. It was my responsibility to keep him safe, one way or another. It doesn't matter that I didn't do it on purpose. It doesn't matter that he did something he shouldn't. You cannot blame the children for things like that. It was my fault, through and through. And I still carry the guilt of that with me to this day."

"..."

"I wasn't going to try to hide what had happened. I mean, his health was the most important thing in that moment. I rushed him to the hospital and contacted his parents. As I said, he ended up being okay in the end. Plus, his parents didn't even blame me. Even though I told them it was my fault, they just smiled and said 'these things happen, just keep doing your best.' What saints they are." Cheerilee takes a deep breath. "However, the rest of the children saw what had happened. Most of their parents were understanding and didn't make a fuss about it, but then one day, in walked Spoiled Rich. She made her demands. I struggled to afford them. And, well, you know the rest."

"Lee... I'm so sorry."

"I'm not looking for pity. That's just what happened. I thought that mistake was going to be the end of me." Cheerilee's serious expression slowly melts into a warm, embarrassed smile. "But then, in came Twilight with an alien to dump on me."

"Who, little old me?"

Cheerilee chuckles.

"Seriously, Anon. I basically owe you my life."

"You owe me no such thing. As far as I'm concerned, we're even now."

"Even?"

"I told you I repay my debts, didn't I?"

"Well, yeah, but what did I do?"

"You taught me everything I needed to know. You tried to understand me. Like, really understand me." Anon takes a deep breath before smiling, his cheeks becoming a slight shade of pink. "You actually wanted to be around me."

"I feel like our problems were on wildly different scales."

"Eh, agree to disagree."

"...Heh. You know, it's strange. I never saw myself becoming this close with anyone, let alone an alien with a bit too much snark."

"I could say the same about a pink nuisance like you. I mean really, you're thirty-four years old and still this childish?" Cheerilee smacks Anon on the back of the head again, but it still isn't enough to hurt. Sure enough, both of them smile and start to laugh. "I probably deserved that."

"Jeez. I can't stand you, you know that?"

"Well, I can't stand you either. After all, I believe you referred to me as 'just a side job?'"

"So you DID hear that?!"

"Sure did. Heh, and look at you, acting like a guilty teenager when I call you out on it." Anon wears a cheeky grin as he teases Cheerilee. "You really are childish."

"Yeah, like the alien that the government told me I have to babysit is any better!"

The two of them have been slowly leaning forward as they sling their obviously-not-serious insults at each other, smiles on their faces all the while.

"And clearly you didn't even do a good job, considering all the bullshit I just saved you from."

"If it means I have to keep dealing with you, then all you did was replace one pain in the ass with another."

Clearly, after the stress of the evening and the nature of their strange relationship, both Cheerilee and Anon find catharsis in these faux arguments of theirs.

"Believe me, I'd like nothing more than to never have to deal with you again, either! You teachers never shut up."

"Like you're one to talk. Apparently humans like the sound of their own voices, because I don't think you've ever stopped spewing garbage since we met."

Their faces are mere inches apart now. They can both feel the other's breath through their grinning faces.

"The only one spewing garbage here is you, Lee. You, and your... beautiful dress."

"Yeah yeah, whatever you say, man of the hour."

"Shut up."

"Make me."

Anon cups Cheerilee's face in his hands and closes the rest of the gap between them, eagerly pressing his lips to her own. She lightly moans as both close their eyes and lean further into the other. They begin to embrace, neither breaking their passionate kiss. Their faces grow flushed, but the evening breeze prevents them from getting too hot. Thus, the two of them stay like that for a long while, the quiet-yet-burning love in the air seen by none but the skittish creatures of the garden.

Eventually, they're forced to part in order to catch their breaths. They stare into each other's eyes for a few moments as they fruitlessly try to regain their composure, neither brave enough to bring up how flushed the other looks.

"...Wow," Anon mumbles.

"I, uh... hm."

"..."

Anon and Cheerilee, who just had a heart-to-heart followed by a strangely happy argument that immediately led into a heat-of-the-moment kiss, turn away from each other and look at the ground, their faces red as can be.

"H-hey, uh..." Anon nervously speaks up. He glances towards Cheerilee, but is too anxious to look her in the eye. This is fine by her, as she's just as flustered. "You are my date at this gala, right?"

"I... wouldn't object to you saying that."

"Then, would you, er... like to dance?"

"...Yeah." Cheerilee smiles as she finally brings herself to lock eyes with Anon, who smiles in turn. "I think I would."

The two stand from the bench and begin to slowly approach each other, their cheeks still red as can be. However, once they're right in front of each other, they realize that there is a problem.

"This height difference is going to be an issue, isn't it?"

"Hmhm. Don't underestimate me, Nonny."

"Nonny?"

"What, I'm the only one who gets a cute pet name?"

"...Heh."

To Anon's surprise, Cheerilee stands on her hind legs and presses her front legs against his chest. Catching on to what she's doing, he grabs one hoof in each hand as they lose themselves in each other's eyes.

"Well? Aren't you supposed to lead, big guy?"

"You have no idea how a human dances, do you?"

"No, but I'm a fast learner."

"Haha! I guess I'll be the teacher tonight, then."

Thus, the two slowly begin to dance under the moonlit sky. The quiet gardens of Canterlot Castle provide the perfect place for this strange, newly formed couple to celebrate the first day of the rest of their lives, all while the merriment of the Grand Galloping Gala continues in the distance.

And neither have ever been happier.

It Can't Be Taught

"Congratulations, everyone!"

A roar of cheers rings out across Ponyville as dozens of caps fly into the air. Cheerilee, who sits on a makeshift stage that was set up in front of the town hall, is right there with the cheering crowd, a proud smile on her face as she does her best to hold back her tears. Her students have now officially graduated, and the whole town is celebrating their transition into their adult lives. Said lives will take many forms, of course. Some plan to attend Princess Twilight Sparkle's School of Friendship. Some plan to pursue a higher education elsewhere. Some already have jobs lined up, and some are still working on that part. It's a turbulent time in their lives, but also an exciting one. These events always get Cheerilee emotional.

From behind the podium, the class valedictorian steps down. Cheerilee glances to the seat next to her, where the salutatorian sits. Said salutatorian glances right back and gives Cheerilee a warm smile. It's a smile that she's been seeing more of lately, especially since Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo got their cutie marks. Indeed, the student with the second-highest grades in the class was none other than Diamond Tiara. Both glance back at the valedictorian, who smiles at them as she takes her own seat. Ultimately, it was Twist that ended up having the highest grades. Cheerilee quickly scans the crowd, and she notices Spoiled Rich sitting near the back, an uncomfortable look on her face.

Cheerilee withholds a chuckle as she recalls the night of the gala, which was several years ago at this point. Thanks in no small part to her status, Spoiled did not actually end up in jail. However, she did still face criminal charges and had to pay a hefty fine. Not that money really matters to a member of the Rich family, of course. The bigger issue for her was the irreparable damage she did to her own reputation. She lost a lot of respect that day, not to mention her place in the EEA. To this day she still retains her place on the school board, but the other members of said board keep her in check. Really, at this point, she's just a glorified wallet for the board. Not that Cheerilee's complaining, of course.

Meanwhile, without Spoiled breathing down Cheerilee's neck, she was able to intervene whenever she saw Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon up to their old tricks. It wasn't actually that hard, all things considered. Even the slightest pushback from authority got them to stop. However, she was still unable to do much about their behavior when they weren't on school grounds. Thankfully, on that fateful day when Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo got their cutie marks, she seemed to have a change of heart. Now, bullying is a problem of the past. At least, as far as she can tell.

Chancellor Neighsay himself approaches the podium. He already gave a speech earlier in the ceremony, so all he's doing is giving a few closing thoughts before directing ponies on how to leave in an orderly fashion. Once he finishes his thoughts, Cheerilee and the other prominent ponies seated on stage stand up and quietly make their exit. Diamond Tiara gives her one final hug before rushing off to meet her friends, all of whom appear to be celebrating together. Cheerilee scans the crowd one final time, a content smile on her face all the while. She makes eye contact with Spoiled Rich very briefly, but neither maintain said eye contact for long. Without a daughter to put through school anymore, Cheerilee imagines that Spoiled will likely be stepping down from the school board of her own volition.

Meaning she won't be her problem anymore.

Chuckling to no one in particular, Cheerilee excuses herself from the crowd, which is slowly growing louder now that the ceremony itself is over. The smile never leaves her face as she trots down the evening road, illuminated only by the moon and the street lamps. Her house isn't actually that far away, so it doesn't take her long to arrive. When she does, she stops for just a moment before reaching for the door.

Her house is a far cry to what it looked like several years ago. No longer is it dirty and falling apart. The wood looks nice, the ceiling was replaced just a few months ago, and there is even a nice garden growing in the landscaping. Not that she's responsible for any of that, of course. She's awful at taking care of her house, even when she CAN afford it.

It's a good thing she doesn't teach home economics.

Smiling to herself, she takes out her key and opens the door. The lights inside are already on, and a distinct smell hits her nose. She closes and locks the door behind her before taking a few steps towards the kitchen, being careful to make as little noise as possible. The sound of a deep voice gently humming is coming from her kitchen, and she doesn't want to alert the creature it belongs to. However, just as she thinks this, the humming stops. She stands perfectly still until a voice rings out.

"I already heard you close the door, Lee. You're not fooling anyone."

"Ah, darn it!" Cheerilee takes the last few steps she needed to enter the kitchen, where Anon waits for her. He looks a bit older than he did at the gala. He's more muscular now, and his beard is now full and well-groomed. He wears a light-green apron while cooking that goes surprisingly well with his plain white tee. In general, he looks casual and comfortable, and he greets her with a grin. "One of these days I'll get ya!"

"Doubt it. Lucky is better at keeping me on my toes than you are."

"Speaking of, where is-"

"BOO!"

"AAAH!"

Cheerilee jumps directly into the air like a startled cat at the sudden noise that came from right behind her. She lands in Anon's arms unharmed before elbowing him and forcing him to put her down. Now facing the other direction, she can confirm what she had suspected. Sure enough, a young colt is looking up at her with a cocky smile on his face.

"Gotcha!"

"Lucky Leaf, if you do that again, you are in big trouble!"

"But you just tried to scare dad."

Cheerilee stares blankly at the colt for a moment before sighing.

"I suppose I did."

This spry colt is Lucky Leaf. He's six years old, and he has no cutie mark. His coat is a dark-pinkish color and his short mane is a mixture of light pink and black. His tail is similar to his mane, but its unkempt tip makes it clear that he's not very good at grooming it. He has a chubby face, though he is rapidly growing to be taller than other colts his age. His sparkling green eyes look just like his mother's. In fact, he takes after his mother a lot, much more than he does his father.

Which is to be expected, Cheerilee supposes, seeing as how his father isn't a pony. He is the son of Anon and herself, after all.

"Dad, when's supper gonna be done?"

"It'll still be a while. Is your homework done?"

"W-well..."

"You have more than enough time to finish it before the food is ready. And if it isn't done by the time the food is ready, you won't be getting any."

"Ah!"

Without another word, the colt sprints down the hall and enters his room, slamming the door behind him in the process. Cheerilee just watches on as she withholds her laughter.

"How was graduation?" Anon goes right back to cooking as he asks his question.

"It went perfectly. For once."

"Sorry I couldn't make it."

"Well, one of us had to pick Lucky up from practice. And unless you want to be the one on that stage, then I'd say we ended up where we needed to."

"Careful with the sass, Lee. I'm holding a knife."

"Like you'd cut your wife."

"Eh, she's an old mare anyhow. I doubt anyone would notice."

The two glare at each other, though the grins on their faces make it clear that this banter is both humorous and normal for them.

"Old mare is right." Cheerilee breaks eye contact and walks to Anon's side before leaning on him. "Every graduation makes me feel that much older. Remember when they were small?"

"When they were a bunch of little shits? Yeah, I remember."

Cheerilee elbows Anon again.

"Stop it with that, what if Lucky hears you?"

"Lucky has heard worse from me."

"And you're going to be hearing even worse from me if our son picks up your foul language!"

"Alright, alright. I won't teach him what 'fuck' means."

"You didn't even... ugh. I really can't with you sometimes."

"You never could. And yet!" Anon confidently bends down and places a kiss directly on Cheerilee's lips before gently grabbing the necklace she has around her neck, which prominently displays a ring at its center. Said ring perfectly matches the one Anon has around his finger. "You married me anyway."

"Heh, that was just because you'd be all alone for the rest of your life if I didn't."

"I seem to recall you telling me that being a mother 'isn't gonna happen at your age,' or something along those lines. And yet, here you are."

"I... what does that have to do with anything?"

"I'm saying that'd be true if not for me taking pity on you."

"Oh, you're gonna get it!"

The two continue their playful back-and-forth for quite some time until Anon finishes making dinner. Cheerilee sets the table as he prepares the food and calls for Lucky, and the three enjoy a pleasant, albeit somewhat late, dinner. After finishing up, Lucky decides to retire to bed of his own volition, but his parents know darn well he's going to be reading his Power Ponies comics late into the night while pretending to be asleep. They've seen it all before.

Now alone, Anon and Cheerilee retire to their living room and practically throw themselves onto the sofa. In what seems like a practiced motion, Cheerilee leans over and rests her head on Anon's chest while he holds her tight. Both look to be barely awake, yet they're a whole lot cuddlier than one might expect based on the bickering that was going on not long ago.

"How was work today, Nonny?"

"Busy. For once, Derpy filled out all of the correct information. Unfortunately, she did it all on the wrong form." Not long after his "lessons" with Cheerilee formally ended, Anon got a job as an accountant in the town hall. He works right there with Mayor Mare taking care of the public's information, though he also does some work helping the locals with their taxes and the sort. At first, few ponies wanted anything to do with him. He was, after all, still an alien. However, over time, he slowly began to gain their trust. Now, he's mostly respected as a helpful and friendly face around Ponyville. There are still a few ponies that are cautious around him, but for the most part, he's made a name for himself in town and he couldn't be more satisfied. "You look tired, Lee."

"Yeah, well, talking in front of a crowd is a lot different than talking in front of a classroom full of children. I think I'm allowed to be tired tonight." Anon opens his mouth to respond, but Cheerilee interrupts him before he can say anything. "Don't give me any more sass. I'm all sassed out now."

She buries her head even further into Anon's chest, and he simply chuckles and gently strokes her mane.

"Alright, alright. Though, I wasn't even planning on giving you more sass."

"Hm?"

"I was just gonna say that I can tell you're tired because you get really cuddly when you're exhausted."

"Am I exhausted that often?"

"Well... not anymore."

"Hm. Maybe I should change that."

"What, you want me to put you back into debt?"

"No, I want you to hold me tighter." Cheerilee whines in a playful manner, causing Anon to roll his eyes, grab Cheerilee in her entirety, and pull her into a tight hug. "That's better."

"You sure you're feeling all right?"

"Yeah." Cheerilee lets out a deep, contented sigh. "I've just been reminiscing."

"Oh?"

"...Don't worry about it."

The two sit quietly for a long while, simply enjoying the embrace and relishing the company. Eventually, however, Anon mumbles something into the quiet room.

"I heard you're going to be getting a griffon student next year."

"That's supposed to be confidential, Nonny."

"I had to handle his paperwork, Lee."

"Oh. Right." Cheerilee shifts just a bit in Anon's arms before getting comfortable again. "Well, yes, I am."

"How do you think that's gonna go?"

"Well, the EEA has been revising their 'ponies only' policies ever since the debacle at the School of Friendship, so it shouldn't be an issue."

"Do you think you can teach a griffon?"

"I taught a human, didn't I?" Her words cause Anon to laugh out loud, which he does his best to keep as quiet as possible.

"Yeah, I'm sure he's gonna be just fine with you in charge."

"Thank you, Nonny."

The couple returns to their comfortable silence, each happily holding the other tight. It took them a while to reach this point, but against all odds, they ended up finding the happiness they were so desperately seeking when they met. The lost, confused, pessimistic human found someone to love, someone who actually understands him. Meanwhile, the exhausted, depressed, financially ruined teacher was able to see justice be done, and the system that broke her changed. These two weary creatures, who will likely continue to face new forms of hardship throughout their lives, can at least rest easy knowing that they have help. They have their family. They have each other.

And that's something that can't be taught.

Author's Note

Thank you all so much for joining me on this journey, and thank you for all of your wonderful feedback! I had an incredible time writing this story, and I hope you enjoyed reading it as well!

As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!

World Experience

Cheerilee stands in an empty schoolhouse, her saddlebag still draped over her torso as she does whatever she can to keep herself awake. It's a good thing there aren't any students around, because the bags under her eyes would make her growing exhaustion obvious to anypony who saw her.

Her bored, tired torment comes to an end when she hears a knock on the door. Before she can answer it, however, her guest opens it on her behalf. Unsurprisingly, Anon is on the other side, his well-made suit still worn over his imposing figure. Just like the day prior, his sharp eyes pierce Cheerilee, a look of disdain all over his face.

"Good morning, Anon."

"...Yeah." Anon lets out a frustrated grunt. "I assume I need to take a seat again?"

"Not this time." Anon raises an eyebrow. "Twilight didn't just want me to teach you basic knowledge, she wanted me to help you adjust to your new life here in Equestria."

"If I had my way, that life would be short lived."

Cheerilee glares impatiently at Anon's comment, but chooses not to respond to it.

"Regardless, life isn't taught in a classroom. We're going to get you some real world experience."

"Right, because I don't have plenty of that already."

"Watch your tone, or we'll be going through a four-hour lesson on pony mating habits instead."

"...Pfft."

Anon glances away with an impatient huff, and Cheerilee celebrates her small-yet-significant victory silently in her head. With a smug look on her face, she walks past Anon towards the still-open door.

"Now, come on. I'm going to give you a tour of Ponyville. Luckily it's not too big, but it should have enough to cover everything I wanted to teach today."

Anon says nothing, opting instead to silently follow his new teacher with a scowl on his face. He has to actively slow himself down as he walks beside her, as his large stature means that his natural walking speed is a great deal faster than Cheerilee's. It doesn't take long for them to reach Ponyville's open-air market, filled end-to-end with stalls of all shapes and sizes.

"This is the market, where most ponies do their grocery shopping. There are some other hoof-crafted goods around too, but most of the time you'll find that the market is typically geared towards perishable items."

"I know what a market is."

Cheerilee withholds a sigh.

"I never claimed otherwise. That's not the point anyway." Cheerilee shakes her head and starts pointing at various stalls as she speaks. "I was hoping to highlight the specific types of things you can usually see at the market. Over there is Big Mac from the Apple family, who is predictably selling some fresh apples. That over there is the flower stand, run by Daisy, Roseluck, and Lily Valley. They take their jobs very seriously."

"Surely they don't get enough business to care that much?"

"Hm? Why wouldn't they?"

Anon glances down at Cheerilee with confusion.

"Outside of, like, holidays or anniversaries or whatever, what's the point of flowers? Besides, aren't there flowers all over Ponyville?"

"Well, sure, but you wouldn't eat a wildflower, would you?"

"I wouldn't eat any kind of flower. What do I look like, a cow?"

Cheerilee stares at Anon for a moment as she feels heat rising to her face. Hold it in, Cheerilee. It's not worth it. It's not worth it. It's not worth it.

"Excuse me?!" Okay maybe it's worth it. "First of all, that is extremely insensitive to cows, several of which live in Ponyville! Second of all, even if I were to take that as an insult, it was completely uncalled for!"

Anon looks surprised for a moment, but said surprise quickly turns to anger.

"I wasn't even trying to insult you, but hey, if the boot fits, feel free to take it as one!"

"What could you have possibly meant to convey if not an insult?!"

"Humans don't eat flowers, smartass!"

"Then why didn't you start with that, you... you..." She forces herself to close her eyes tight before taking a deep, deep breath. Keep it together, Cheerilee. You're better than this. With a twitching eye, she looks back up at her newest student, finishing her thought through gritted teeth. "I suppose we'll need to discuss the differences in our diets, won't we?"

"...Fine."

Anon's voice was noticeably quieter and less angry, catching Cheerilee by surprise. However, her anger has not yet subsided. Without another word, she trots right past Anon, motioning for him to follow her.

It's going to be a long day.

Cheerilee and Anon sit across from each other at a small outdoor table in front of a local sandwich shop. While Cheerilee appears to be uncomfortable around her human companion, it's clear that he is much more uncomfortable. However, this is most likely due to the fact that his large stature means that he is squeezed into his small metal chair extremely tightly, and his knees are higher up than he is likely happy with. His half-lidded eyes and (at this point, nearly permanent) scowl convey his feelings far greater than words ever could.

The two sit in awkward silence for a minute or two before a waiter arrives at their table. He slides menus over to each of them, but not before giving Anon a judgemental side-eye. Cheerilee notes that such side-eyes have been a common sight since they left the schoolhouse. After they both receive their menus and are served a couple of glasses of water, the waiter departs, leaving the two alone yet again. Apart from them, the establishment appears to have no patrons. Cheerilee is thankful for the umbrella over their table, as without it, the hot sun would almost certainly make this an even more uncomfortable lunch.

"So. This is a sandwich shop. The menu is a bit limited, but the options should give you an idea of what a lot of common ingredients are in Equestria."

"This part here just says 'hay.'"

"Hay is a pretty common side dish. Or, if you'd prefer, some have it as their whole meal. It really is the cornerstone of most diets."

"Humans don't eat hay. Well... not on its own like that, at least. I think."

"Ah. If you ever go to an establishment for food, you'll probably need to specifically request to not get hay. It usually comes with a meal."

"...I see."

Cheerilee looks up from her menu at Anon, who doesn't notice on account of being absorbed in his own menu. He's being strangely compliant right now.

"Well, most of the other items on the menu are sandwiches or salads, so I guess this just boils down to what kinds of sandwiches or salads you like."

"You ponies don't eat meat, do you?"

"What?! N-no, of course not!"

"Hm."

"...D-do you?"

"Used to. Looks like I won't be anymore."

Anon never takes his eyes off of his menu. His voice sounds strangely disappointed, lacking the gruffness and icy tone she is used to hearing from him. Cheerilee feels a slight chill run down her spine.

"Did you... er..."

"If you're about to ask if I ever ate pony meat, no, I didn't. That wasn't exactly commonplace where I'm from. I suppose it's not completely unheard of to eat horse meat, but I've never done it." Cheerilee cannot find the right words to say as her mouth hangs slightly agape. Anon continues to read from his menu for a moment before finally looking up at Cheerilee, a slightly amused expression on his face. "Settle down, I'm not gonna eat you."

"Then what are you going to eat?"

"There are plenty of things I can have on this menu. I'll just have to stick to a vegetarian diet while I'm here."

"Oh. G-good!"

Cheerilee isn't quite sure how to follow up on that conversation, leading to the two falling silent once more. Eventually, their waiter comes around and takes their orders. Cheerilee gets a lily-and-mayo sandwich while Anon just gets a salad. It doesn't take long for them to get their food, and they end up eating their lunch in silence. However, before Anon can finish, he suddenly freezes.

"Um... are you paying for this?"

"I was going to, yes. I figured you didn't have a job."

"I don't." Anon stares into his salad silently for a moment before he goes back to eating, but not before mumbling something that Cheerilee barely catches. "Thanks."

"Um. Y-you're welcome."

Cheerilee stares at Anon, who pays her no mind as he continues digging into his food. Did he just thank her? Like, sincerely? She certainly wasn't expecting that out of him, that's for sure.

...Ugh, why can't she get a read on this guy?!

The rest of the afternoon went about as Cheerilee expected. She showed Anon various landmarks around Ponyville, each with an associated lesson on pony culture. And for each thing she tried to teach, Anon retaliated with sass or a thinly veiled insult. In a strange way, she almost feels like she's getting used to it. For better or for worse.

Now there is only one landmark left for them to cover, and she already knows that he is going to have no interest in it whatsoever.

"Finally, this is the town hall. It also doubles as Ponyville's courthouse, though with how little crime there is in Equestria, that part rarely gets used. I suppose the only reason you'd really need to go here is if you had business with Mayor Mare, like if you wanted to get a permit or something, or if you wanted to access somepony's income information."

"Income information?"

"Well, yeah. You know, their salary, their expenditures, their tax payments, all of that."

"First of all, they just have that information ready to go? Second of all, what do you mean by 'somepony's?' Surely you just mean my own, right?"

"Why wouldn't they have that information? Also, yes, I was mostly referring to your own, though I guess it doesn't necessarily have to be. I don't know why you'd want somepony else's income information, but it is publicly available."

"Isn't that a huge breach of privacy?"

"Uh..." Cheerilee is shocked by the intensity with which Anon is suddenly asking questions. With the exception of lunch, this is the most engrossed she has seen him all day. "Not really? I haven't really given it much thought."

"You could learn a lot of invasive things about someone with that information!"

The two of them continue to walk as they converse.

"But why would somepony even want those 'invasive things?'"

"There are tons of reasons! There's no way that doesn't lead to all sorts of fraud."

"Well, it doesn't. As I said, there is next to no crime in Equestria, fraud or otherwise."

"..."

"I don't know what it's like with you humans, but we're just fine having our income information publicly accessible. It's really not that big of a deal."

Anon sighs, his face suddenly appearing almost as exhausted as Cheerilee's.

"If you say so."

The pair comes to a stop in front of a small, bland-looking home. Cheerilee suddenly realizes that ever since their conversation started, Anon has been the one leading the way. She was so engrossed in what he was saying that she failed to notice until now, leaving her confused as to where they are.

"Where have you taken us?"

"This is my new home, I guess."

Cheerilee carefully inspects the shoddy looking home. It's a great deal smaller than her own, and it doesn't look to be in much better condition. In fact, it appears to be falling apart. If she had to guess from its size, she'd say that it likely has a kitchen, a small living area, a bathroom, and a single bedroom. Pretty much the bare minimum that a house in Ponyville can get away with.

"I thought you said you didn't have any money."

"I don't. Twilight pulled some strings for me."

"It's, uh... a bit of a fixer-upper, don't you think?"

As if on cue, one of the shutters next to a nearby window falls to the ground with a loud cracking sound. Anon takes a deep breath. Cheerilee notes that his expression has changed, now seeming almost wistful.

"Maybe, but I don't plan to complain."

"Heh. That's surprising, coming from you."

She immediately covers her mouth with her hoof, realizing that she just said that out loud.

"I won't downplay the fact that buying a house is a major financial burden. Twilight has relieved me of that burden." Anon sighs before finishing his thought. "And I've saddled her with it in the process. The least I can do is be thankful for it. Well, until I can actually pay her back, that is."

"You're going to pay her back? For a whole house?"

"When I get a job and can afford it, yes." Anon finally looks back at Cheerilee, the wistful expression never leaving his face. "Is that really so strange?"

"No. No, I suppose it isn't."

Cheerilee isn't quite sure what to make of this situation. Anon is sending her all kinds of mixed signals, knowingly or otherwise. Plus, she can't imagine being in his shoes. He's right, after all. Even in Equestria, which has a very strong economy, buying a house is no laughing matter. If she were offered a house, she wouldn't think twice before saying yes. And if it were a gift, like Anon's seems to be, she wouldn't even consider paying it back. She doesn't have that kind of money! That's why her house looks just as run down as this crummy little thing!

"Well, if that's all, I think I'm going to go inside now."

"Oh! R-right. Have a nice evening, Anon. I'll see you again tomorrow."

Anon says nothing, opting instead to raise his hand in a low-effort wave before entering his home and closing the door in Cheerilee's face. Now alone, she turns away from the small house and begins walking in the direction of her own humble abode.

The orange-yellow glow of the afternoon sunset illuminates Cheerilee's path as she slowly makes her way down the winding dirt roads of Ponyville. Countless thoughts race through her mind as she questions Anon's behavior today. Somehow, he ended up being exactly as rowdy, rude, and unapologetically flippant as she was expecting. And yet, here and there, she could swear that she got a glance at something else underneath, like a genuine curiosity about the world around him. That's not even mentioning the attitude shift when his house was involved. Was he really showing gratitude towards what is quite possibly the biggest gift Twilight could have given him, or was that just a result of whatever it is about Twilight that gets him into such a tizzy?

Ugh. How troublesome.

As Cheerilee finally makes it home and steps into her dark, quiet, lonely house, she decides to just shake her head and simplify all of her thoughts down into one easy-to-digest sentiment.

She still doesn't like him.