The Bird Is The Word

by Summer Dale Pony

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Death, Alternate Universe, Bat Pony, Adventure, Violence, Wonderbolts
Length: 2270

MLP x Full Metal Jacket

My name is Rocky Climb, and like all my comrades, I am an Equestrian pegasus. I fly as part of the 3rd Squadron of Wonderbolts under the command of Captain Sharp Edge. Our unit prevented the infiltration of the lunarist heresy into our ranks. We are faithful to our duty to protect and serve our country and Princess Celestia the solar patroness of all daytime ponies.

Published 2023-10-05 04:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-10-05 04:50:01 UTC

For What It's Worth

In a partially ruined building, a wounded pegasus flew in and shouted "GENERAL DAWNLIGHT IS TRAITOR!"
These famous words of Sergeant Skyblue, spoken on the day when the sun did not rise, marked the beginning of the Great Civil War in Equestria, also known as the Second Lunar Rebellion.

My name is Rocky Climb, and like all my comrades, I am an Equestrian pegasus. I fly as part of the 3rd Squadron of Wonderbolts under the command of Captain Sharp Edge. Our unit prevented the infiltration of the lunarist heresy into our ranks. We are faithful to our duty to protect and serve our country and Princess Celestia the solar patroness of all daytime ponies. That's why on that fateful day we were dispatched to the far edge of the Everfree Forest by the traitors seeking to restore the lost cause of Nightmare Moon, away from the Castle of the Two Sisters, where they planned their Grand Betrayal.

But they underestimated how fast pegasi of our elite squadron are. Equipped with tactical gear, semi-automatic carbines, and radios, we could take the initiative in any situation. So, upon arrival at the alarm signal, we found a group of ponies in the uniform of Equstrian infantry tearing off their identification marks and attaching silver crescents instead.

"How dare you cast aside our solar emblem, treacherous deceivers?" asked our captain to a gray unicorn.

"These are pegasi; they are not part of the conspiracy! Run!" he commanded his group.

"What are our orders?" I asked the captain.

"We must teach them a lesson before they cause any trouble. Attack!"

Under a hail of our bullets, the apostates fled into the thick of the Everfree Forest and began to return fire. One of the bullets whizzed right by my ear, making me pale with fear. But we are not easily defeated; the battle is just begun. I took cover behind a fallen log, while the rest of the pegasi took up other positions to crossfire.

Traitors likely understood that there were outnumbered, surrounded and doomed. Their only way out was to surrender.

Our captain began negotiations, "We have bombs. In the name of Celestia, drop your weapons and surrender, you scoundrels!"

The fanatics ranted and shouted the same nonsense they should have kept to themselves, "Chew on our tails, Glory to the New Lunar Republic!"

The captain nodded decisively.

Motion Drive executed his signature Hoofball move, hurling a howling explosive right into the enemy's hideout, and following his command... *BOOM!* ...our brave Wonderbolts rose from their cover and turned the thicket into a sieve, *boom! boom! boom! click boom! click boom! click.* Dry wood, leaves, and patches of soil flew into the air.

And... is that all?

Complete silence fell, tension rising. The sharp eyes of the pegasi tried to discern the results of the battle in the ominous darkness.

A pegasus in the adjacent hideout reloaded his carbine, and following his lead, I decided to change magazines.

Reloading... I retrieved a spare magazine from my belt with my teeth, just like in target practice. But then silhouette flashed between the trees. I reacted, aimed my carbine... and... *click.*

"Rotten hay, what a mess!" I said and shoved the magazine into the carbine. Bitter remorse for the missed chance gnawed at me.

"Hold on... what?" Following the first one, one after another, the traitors started leaping out of their hiding spots right in front of me.

*Boom! click boom! click boom! click*

And one of them fell to the ground like a leaf.

Nervousness in my legs, breath caught in my throat. One second, two...

Today, I shot my first enemy.

The scoundrel lies there and won't get up again.

"Guys!!! Did you see that?" My smile spread from ear to ear.

Taking life away is... easy.

***

They say the alicorn sisters battled until the elder prevailed and raised the sun. The Lunar Rebels had to leave the lands of Equestria and retreat to the southeast jungles of the wild land of Thestralia, which had already thrown off the rule of Equestrian colonial garrisons.

***

Four months later...

The small Thestralian settlement of Noxville was left in ruins during the battles, and the fate of its inhabitants was left to the discretion of the military.

A blue pegasus with short, silver mane stood with a few comrades over a group of adolescent thestralian colts. They had their eyes and legs bound with fabric scraps.

"Sir, I swear we're not helping the Night Empress's soldiers!" said the blue batpony.

"We will be your helpers... work for you, sir. Just let us go!" chimed in another.

"Ugh... I don't need helpers like you. You will simply flee to the jungles as soon when you get such a chance. And Gallop Ray dungeons are already filled with ones like you..." replied the pegasus, lighting a cigarette.

A drop of moisture gathered at the tip of a bush leaf and fell down. The sounds of a few shots barely disturbed the colorful exotic birds in the dense tropical undergrowth.

The group of pegasi returned to the barracks. The silver-maned one spat out and crushed his cigarette with his hoof.

"Just to be sure we'll stay away from troubles, huh, Stiff Mane?" they greeted him.

"Look at it from another perspective All native mares in this village will be ours now!" the white pegasus, who had just sprawled on one of the uncomfortable bunk beds, exclaimed with a self-satisfied look.

"After we win the war, each of us will take home a thestral wife!" another one joined in.

"Nah... They're all so skinny..." finally spoke Stiff Maine.

"And they have fangs!" added the robust yellow pegasus called Sand Castle.

"We can file their fangs down," said the white one.

"Why... I wouldn't mind being bitten by a thestral mare," replied the yellow one.

The scarred blue pegasus, who hadn't said a word until now, warned, "Don't mess with thestral mares; they're cunning and treacherous creatures."

"We'll handle it, old pony," interrupted the blonde.

Sleeping at night was a rare luxury for us. In Thestrallia, spilled blood is never left unpaid. According to simple statistics, when you take someone's life, someone will eventually take yours. I had already been in that line too.

It was getting dark outside. The barracks were stuffy. I wanted to get some fresh air.

"Oh, Rocky! You're here too," my good friend Lime Shine was lurking outside.

"Hello," I said.

"What do you think about all of this? You wouldn't read about this kind of stuff in newspapers..."

"I don't like to think about it too much. But, you know... I no longer see a reason to regret thestrals. They're the ones to blame for this war outbreak... Tartarus should take the Moon Harlot and her whole kin. Maybe what's happening is... right. For the sake of Equestria's welfare," I expressed my uncertain thoughts.

Lime Shine didn't respond. The conversation didn't continue.

"Listen... The spotlight from the surveillance tower has been shining in one spot for quite a while... Don't you find that strange?" the green pegasus asked.

"Maybe the guys from the tower went to take a leak?" I ventured to guess.

"They can't do this..."

"EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"- A prolonged screech, the source of which could never be determined, made us cover our ears and run.

"Thestralian attack! Thestralian attack!" we shouted in alarm.

Enemy bullets pierced the thin walls of the barracks in several places. Guys started rearranging furniture to create cover. A firefight began.

Well, it seems this is the end for me...

Lime and I stood on either side of one of the windows. I cautiously tried to aim at the shadows.

*Boom! Click, boom! Click, boom! Click*

"I... I can't. I can't see!" I said to Lime.

He tried to peek out cautiously to assess the situation. And...

"Ah!"

"Lime!!! Dear Celestia, they shot Lime! Hang in there, buddy, I'll get you to safety."

"It's... okay..." he replied, letting go of his rifle. I picked up my friend and dragged him to where he could receive medical attention.

Meanwhile, our dark-maned captain, Sharp Edge, was yelling into the telephone receiver, "RECEIVE! Pegasopolis, do you read me?... We require urgent air support! I repeat, air support!"

I felt myself getting wet with blood. Lime lowered his head passively; his neck had been injured.

"Friend, say something..." I kept speaking to him in vain.

Being killed... is easy."

***

"Usually, the flying fortresses never arrive in time to help. But this time, we were already under Pegasopolis' cover by midnight. Shells flew like comets through the night sky, and when they hit the ground, they engulfed the jungles in sacred solar fire! Against the backdrop of the fires, we could see the figures of savages as if it were daytime.

So the counterattack began.

To hell with statistics. Right now, I just want to shoot down a few monsters!

Moving organically across the terrain with short flights, the Wonderbolts shifted between positions. Bullets whizzed by us repeatedly, but the light of the fire blinded the thestrals, making their aim worse, and we relentlessly pursued them. Some were already skirmish in the air; those were the thestrals trying to escape, but the pegasi were faster. Ammunition ran out, and there was nowhere for the Festrals to retreat behind the curtain of fire. A hoof-to-hoof battle ensued.

"For the children of Thestrallia!" shouted a violet Thestrallian headhuntress, and the Batponies ponies charged into the attack.

The blond one struck one of the savages in the head, and something snapped. Pegasi were simply stronger.

The violet one lunged at the yellow pegasus and bit into his neck with her fangs. He roared in pain and received a blow from a hoof-dagger under his ribs.

I, the blond one, and his comrade surrounded the beast from all sides. She had bright yellow eyes and bloody-red leather membranes on her wings. She tried to break free and sent the blond one into a knockout. The other one hesitated to attack, so I did it and knocked the thestral to the ground with my hind hooves. I reared up to finish the creature off, but violence was stopped by the captain.

"Enough. They surrender. The Equestrian army... does not kill prisoners," he ordered.

The entire area was littered with wounded and dead. The battle was over.

***

On the table, a fan was blowing. A bay pegasus in a sky blue uniform with a neatly combed salad-yellow mane looked through closed blinds at the courtyard. The dim moonlight illuminated another figure in the room. The pegasus adjusted the lightning bolt, symbol of Wonderbolts, badge on his collar.

"Oh, Midnight Haze, you're as punctual as always. Can I offer you some whiskey?" said the one taking his place at the table.

"General Firewood, I must decline," replied the gray thestral, taking off his ranger hat adorned with a silver moon emblem and a purple ribbon.

General Firewood nodded, filling his own glass with alcohol.

"I see you've used incendiary rounds again," thestral inquired.

"Yes. What else could I do? Tribal warriors attacked our camp in Noxville and started a real massacre," the pegasus replied.

"They had their reasons..."

"Why these damn nocturnal raids? If you wish, we can arrange a pitched battle," Firewood interrupted him.

"I'm not ready for a pitched battle yet," thestral admitted.

"I see. So we met because I have a matter to discuss with you – lately, the situation hasn't been looking very good for our army. For example, the failed Ocean Shore's offensive in Talatilica. The entire squad taken prisoner is bad publicity. It would be highly advantageous if you could return our prisoners and help us cover this from Princess Celestia," Firewood explained.

"This has happened for the third time!? – Midnight Haze was surprised.

"Ocean Shore is still an inexperienced commander..." Firewood explained.

"Excuse me, but this won't be for free. Return the representatives of the Yeshatli clan you took as prisoners under Noxville," Haze demanded.

"I don't think that's possible. I didn't consider that option. We would just give up our achievements in that battle. The leaders of this clan... they're not like you, do you get it? You can't make deals with them. They will return and cause more trouble," Firewood explained.

"Then you'll receive your prisoners with necklaces made from their own entrails!" Haze flared up.

"Hey, don't get so worked up. I believe you could handle this situation again, like when you stopped twelve chieftains from storming Fort Warm Way," the bay pegasus pleaded.

"In that case, you could fulfill my request, like when you stopped Coltumbia in the Scaled Mountains from firing upon my retreating forces," Haze remembered.

"Alright, I'll figure something out," General Firefly finally agreed to the Thestrallian leader's conditions.

*** In the Noxville camp, ponies in Equestrian military uniforms were opening cages and placing captured thestrals into cargo trucks.

"What's going on? Where are you taking them?" I asked the military police officer.

"Higher command issued an order for a prisoner exchange," replied the Earth pony in a steel helmet.

"But these are dangerous headhunters! You can't just release them!" I protested.

"We have to do this so our comrades don't rot in thestral slavery deep in the jungles. You wouldn't want to be in their place, would you?" the earth pony said with a glare.

The violet thestral headhuntress made a throat-slitting gesture with her hoof and whispered, "Beware, feathered one."

I felt uneasy, and I swallowed hard. I don't know what this war is all about anymore.