Twilight takes Celestia Back to Mcdonalds
by TheCrimsonDM
Twilight had recently acquired her very own personal vehicular machine, otherwise known as a 'car'. It was supposed to be a great way to travel from Ponyville to Canterlot, of course that was before Celestia decided it was a great way to relax. Having taken up most of the back seat laying down and sticking her head into the front seat, Celestia stared at Twilight as they drove through the town.
“Are we there yet?” Celestia asked. Her tone mostly innocent.
Twilight looked out the window. The giant red sign with it's accursed yellow M was glaring at her from up ahead. “Almost.”
“I want the happy meal with the pink human toy.”
Twilight let out a sigh. This again. “Don't you already have that one?”
“No, I have all the others, but I need the pink one so that the purple human can have a partner to date. I like shipping those two together.”
“Isn't it odd those 'human' toys are very specifically colored and designed?”
Celestia blinked at her. “no. Dusk Shine is a very original toy, as is the one I want Bubble Berry, he's pink and cheerful and always throws parties. I don't know any pony like that, do you?”
Even Twilight wasn't dense enough to not see the blatant resemblances and probably infringements on her character... but if it made Celestia happy that would be fine. So long as she wasn't-
The sun began weaving in and out of the horizon like a drunken sailor.
“Celestia! Stop that!”
she looked back to see Celestia playing with another one of her toys, Rainbow Blitz she believed, making them fly in tandem with the sun's movements. “Whee, look they can fly with the sun all day long.”
“Celestia your going to cause another mass panic.”
The sun stopped it's drunken wavering. “Fine... sorry, I'm just bored. I need my new toy.”
They pulled into the drive through and Twilight wasted no time. “Give me a happy meal with the pink human in it or we may very well see another apocalypse this year.”
There was silence for a moment then a crackle and buzz as a static filled voice replied back. “Twilight? Sure, sure, come to the front. It's on the house.”
They understood after the last tantrum, do not upset the sun-wielding alicorn or their book pony pupil. She pulled up to the driveway and they passed off the meal with a look of pure terror in their eyes. It wasn't often that two princesses came to get food here, nor with such questionable reasons but given the frantic movements of the sun just now, anything was possible.
As Twilight drove off she let out a sigh of defeat. “This is the last time okay. Your scaring them.”
“Okay... now that I got Bubble Berry to date Dusk Shine I can...”
She frowned as she dug in the box and looked up at Twilight. “Twilight, we have to go back to McDonald's. They gave me the wrong toy.”
“They did what?”
They turned the car around and immediately began driving back. It was one thing to go here in the first place, but to go here and receive the wrong toy. Now that was an insult. One she'd take up personally with the manager if she had too. They parked out front and both aliconrs left the small confines of the vehicle.
“Twilight, I don't want to cause a commotion. I just want my toy.”
“Oh no, we are getting both your toy and an apology. I swear to all that is holy of moley, I do not drive out there just to be given the wrong freaking toy.”
They walked inside, Celestia looking far more modest despite her immense size. Where Twilight looked fuming mad. Her fur nearly sizzling with rage. She marched up to the front counter where the same pony she saw at the drive through looked at her. His acme was positively terrible, like the craters of the moon but it was just pimples on his face.
“T-Twilight, Princess Celestia how can I be of service?”
Celestia took the initiate. “Oh I don't mean to bother you, but I got the wrong toy. I need the pink human, you know Bubble Berry. You see I need Bubble Berry to date Dusk Shine or Dusk will be forever alone.”
Twilight hissed. “I am not forever alone.”
Celestia smiled down at her. “Of course not, dear. You have me. Now about my toy if you please good sir...”
The pony nodded shakily. “Of course Princesses. Um... about the old toy do you still-”
Celestia smiled “I ate it.”
Twilight growled. “Not again, you know how much that upsets your tummy.”
Celestia “It was a mistake honest. Their just so small like the little apple slices. And it was Applejack after all.”
Twilight “They didn't even rename that one? Who runs this show?”
Celestia “oh its Fazbo Entertainment, they make the toys and the shows and the music and the movie coming out soon that has nothing to do with any of it. Can you believe, Dusk Shine will go to a world where they all become ponies!”
“I hate every single word you just said.”
The stallion spoke carefully as he shook and shivered. “I'm t-terribly sorry miss, but if you lost the toy you'd have to buy another happy meal to get a new-”
Twilight fixed him with a glare so hot that the tips of her main caught on fire. “Excuse me?”
Celestia rolled her eyes. “Twilight don't do the fiery thing again, you look like a Pokemon and Luna keeps throwing pokeballs at you while shouting about rapids and dashes.”
The stallion lifted up a bag with a little plastic toy human with an uncanny resemblance to a mare she knew. “Please don't destroy my restaurant again.”
Twilight purred. “Good pony. Get your toy and lets get out of here.”
Celestia let out a sigh grabbed the toy and stopped just long enough to give an apologetic expression to the stallion. “Thank you for the toy. I'll put in a good review with my sister.”
The pair of them left and once back on the road Twilight attempted to relax. This nightmare was finally done with and she could never return to McDonald's again.
Celestia giggled as she held her two toys aloft having them kiss. It was Dusk Shine and Rainbow Blitz. Twilight had to ask, “Why are they kissing?”
“Oh, Dusk Shine is cheating on Bubble Berry, but its okay because Bubble Berry is sleeping around with Elusive.”
Twilight grumbled. “I would never cheat on you.”
“Of course not, dear. Your the best pony that I could ask for... these humans on the other hand are in constant heat, so... eheheh.”
The End
Author's Note
Just a short story I came up with after seeing this picture. It's been a long time since I've made normal fiction, been writing visual novels too much. This was a fun little break though. Enjoy the absolutely deranged versions of your favorite princesses, normalcy will never return to them.
