Cutie Mark Crusaders Fight Club, Yay!

by ArcadePonyFubuki

Rating: teen
Tags: Diamond Tiara, Romance, Silver Spoon, Equestria Girls, Apple Bloom, Comedy, Profanity, Scootaloo, Violence, Sweetie Belle
Length: 11794

The CMCs go for their last-ditch effort to leave their mark on the school yearbook

The end of the school year is coming up, and the CMCs still don’t have their place in the yearbook. This leads them to the most obvious solution: beating the shit out of each other.

Published 2024-03-30 15:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-03-30 15:30:00 UTC

Rule #1:

MONDAY - THE CAFETERIA - 11:30 AM

“Gaw dammit girls! I just don’t know what we’re doing wrong!” Apple Bloom dropped her head on the table. “We’ve tried everything and still no Cutie Marks! I’m starting to think we gotta just throw in the towel..”

Ah yes, the Cutie Mark. CHS’s cute name for an arbitrary title in the yearbook that only focuses on one small aspect of your being. But also, the only sign that you did anything worth a damn during your high school career. Everyone wanted one, and no one would be caught dead without one.

“What?! We can’t quit now! We’re so close, I can feel it!” Scootaloo hyped up.

“I thought you couldn’t feel anything after we tried chemistry.” Sweetie Belle questioned.

“It’s a figure o’ speech Sweets.” Apple Bloom lifted her head before dropping it down again.

“Besides, that was only in my left hand. Good ol’ righty is still hanging in there!” Scootaloo flexed their right arm.

“Well what does everybody else have that we don’t?” Sweetie Belle wondered aloud.

The three scanned the lunch room for an easy answer they didn’t have to think of themselves.

“Friends?” Scootaloo said, staring at the mane six, er, seven.

“Nah it’s not that, me and Sweetie have those.” Apple Bloom pointed out.

“True.” Scoot shrugged.

“Girlfriends?” Sweetie Belle said, staring at Lyra and Bon Bon.

“I think that actually gets you taken out of the yearbook.” Apple Bloom explained.

“I knew they shouldn’t have put Mudbriar in charge.” Sweetie pouted.

Apple Bloom stared intensely at every group until she took notice of a massive revelation. “That’s it!” She shot up. “Everybody else here is in a club! Just look around, the magic club, the computer club, the brain surgery club, It was staring us right in the face, how didn’t we see it before?!”

“Are we not a club?” Scootaloo questioned.

“Crusadin’s different, I’m talkin’ a real club! With like, more than just us three.” Apple Bloom proposed.

“Woah, woah, we’re gonna talk to other people? That’s a bit extreme don’t you think?!” Scootaloo was astonished by Apple Bloom’s bold idea.

“I know it’s a lot to ask of y’all, but we must do what we have to if we wanna get those Cutie Marks. Now who’s with me?” Apple Bloom stuck her hand out. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo placed their hands over Apple Bloom’s, setting the three off into another of their far out plans.

“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS CLUB MAKERS, YAY!!”

_______________________________________________

MONDAY - MAIN HALL - 2:15 PM

“Join our club!” Apple Bloom said in her best salesperson voice as she held out a flyer to passerby’s.

“Won’t you please join our club mister?” Sweetie Belle did the same.

“Join our club or I’ll kill myself in front of you!” Scootaloo followed suit.

“Hey Scoots you think ya can dial it back a bit?” Apple Bloom advised.

“What? You gotta give the people what they want.” Scootaloo argued.

“We’ll have to unpack that later but for now, PLEASE JOIN OUR CLUB!!” Sweetie Belle shoved a full stack of flyers onto somebody.

“Well well well..”

“Aw fuck me.” Apple Bloom groaned.

“..if it isn’t the Cutie Mark Failures.” Diamond Tiara approached the trio, Silver Spoon at her side.

“What the hell do ya want Diamond?” Apple Bloom immediately got on the defensive.

“Oh nothing, just wanted to see what stupid club you’re trying to start. What is it anyway? An intro to how to be an embarrassment?” Diamond teased relentlessly.

“Nice one.” Silver Spoon fist bumped Diamond.

“I’ll have you know it’s.. it’s a uhh..” Apple Bloom stalled as she quickly realized they never actually decided what their club was about.

“IT’S A KISSING GIRLS CLUB.” Sweetie Belle screamed involuntarily, sweat dripping down her brow. Her eyes darted nervously as everyone stared at her dumbfounded.

“Uhh w-with your fist! It’s a fist.. kissing… club….” Scootaloo recovered.

“So it’s like a fight club, or something?” Diamond Tiara said with clear confusion in her words.

“Uhhhhh yeah! A no holds barred, rough and tumble, bloody knuckle fight club!” Apple Bloom crossed her arms proudly.

“That’s.. actually kinda badass. Good job Cutie Mark Crusaders, you’ve done something not lame for once. Who knows, I might even have to show up to the first meeting.” Diamond Tiara said, ever so slightly impressed.

“Wednesday, after school, in the yearbook room. I expect to see you there, if you’re not chicken.” Apple Bloom challenged.

“You’re on, farm girl.” Diamond walked off in a huff.

“..hey so uh, is that kissing girls club still happening or..?” Silver Spoon inquired.

“SILVER!” Diamond Tiara called out from across the hall.

“Coming!” Silver Spoon quickly ran off.

“Apple Bloom! What the hell was that?! You just personally invited Diamond Tiara to our club!” Scootaloo chastised.

“Hey I’m not the one that made it a fight club, what were you thinking??” Apple Bloom shot back.

“I was just trying to save it after Sweetie Belle botched it!”

“Did somebody say my name? I zoned out for a second.”

“Ugh, whatever, we got us a club now don’t we? And besides, I’m not passing up an opportunity to put that no good prissy jerk in her place.”

“Well I’d rather not have a club with just us and her.” Sweetie Belle pointed out.

“Would it help if we asked people we actually knew by name?” Scootaloo asked.

“Y’know, that idea ain’t half bad Scoots.” Apple Bloom nodded.

“Funny, that’s the exact opposite of what my therapist says.”

_______________________________________________

MONDAY - THE TRACK FIELD - 2:50 PM

“Now why ‘da hell did you start a fight club?”

The Crusaders were standing on the side of the track field recruiting their first, intentional, club member.

“We didn’t mean ta, honest! It just sorta happened.” Apple Bloom shrugged.

“Fight clubs don’t ‘just happen’ Bloom. Have you guys been a gang this whole time or something?”

“What?! No we’re not a- look Babs are you in or not?” Apple Bloom handed a flyer forward.

Babs Seed looked over it curiously.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll join ‘ya gang.” Babs smirked.

“Great! First meeting is this Wedne- Babs.”

“I’m joking, I’m joking. I’ll see ‘ya fellas Wednesday, alright?” Babs winked as she ran back onto the track field.

“See ya there!” Apple Bloom called out. “Alrighty, who else should we ask?”

“How about Pipsqueak?” Scootaloo proposed.

“While I would enjoy punching a British person I don’t think he’s exactly fight club material.” Apple Bloom shot down the suggestion.

“Lily Longsocks would be perfect!” Sweetie Belle beamed at her own brilliance.

“Yeah, for getting us killed! Everyone knows she’s on some freak shit.” Scootaloo rejected Sweetie’s brilliance.

“Might I make a suggestion?” A girl about a foot shorter than the crusaders appeared between the group.

“AAHH!!” All three jumped back in surprise.

“I don’t mean to intrude, but I couldn’t help but hear that you need club members, correct?”

“Where did you..?” Scootaloo looked around in confusion.

“Well allow me to introduce your newest member: me!”

Sweetie Belle gave a small laugh under her breath. “No offense, but aren’t you a little..” she gestured with her hand, insinuating the girl’s small stature. The girl responded by scowling and grabbing Sweetie’s hand, bending back a finger until it loudly snapped.

“OW FUCK!! WHAT THE- GODDAMIT!!” Sweetie fell to the floor.

“The name’s Cozy Glow, I can’t wait to play with you again!” She snatched the flyer out of Apple Bloom’s hand.

“You shouldn’t have tempted her.” Scootaloo looked down at Sweetie Belle as she rolled back and forth.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP SCOOTALOO” Sweetie shouted through tears.

“Well that makes two besides us, good enough for me.” Apple Bloom stated. “Now we just gotta wait for Wednesday..”

_______________________________________________

WEDNESDAY - YEARBOOK ROOM - 3:00 PM

Apple Bloom stood before the members as they sat in a row on the floor, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo to her side.

“Hello everyone, thank you all for attending the first annual meeting of the.. Canterlot High… fight club..” Apple Bloom cleared her throat. “A-anyway let’s go over the uh.. the rules first, I suppose.”

Apple Bloom stepped out of the way and motioned for Scootaloo to take her spot. Scootaloo walked up with a piece of parchment paper in their hands.

“Mhmph.” They cleared their throat. “The first rule of fight club, is to TAKE NO PRISONERS!” Scootaloo ferociously ripped the paper to shreds. “IF YOUR HEAD HITS THE MATT YOU’RE OUT BITCH! SPILL BLOOD OR GET SPILL-“

“Thank you Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom laughed awkwardly as she held Scootaloo’s mouth closed. “Why don’t ‘cha just skip the rules and demonstrate a match for us?”

“Oh! Good idea Apple Bloom, rules are boring anyway. Ok let’s see here… Babs! Come on up here!” Scootaloo called excitedly.

Babs reluctantly got up and walked to Scootaloo’s side as they instructed her what to do.

“Alright so before every match the two people stand like this and bow all karate style, and then we fight!” Scootaloo bowed.

“We just go into it? No like countdown or ‘nothin?” Babs questioned skeptically.

“Yeah, yeah! C’mon just do it!”

Babs copied Scoot’s bow, if a little confused.

Scootaloo eagerly put their fists up. “Now don’t hold back Babs, we can’t teach these people if we don- ACK”

Babs swiftly drove her fist into Scootaloo’s stomach, leaving them breathless and on their knees.

“Nice… nice shot Babs.. you win.” Scootaloo gasped before falling to their side.

“..glad to be of service, I guess.” Babs walked back to her spot on the floor, unsure if she did all that right.

“Oh my god this is stupid.” Diamond Tiara groaned under her breath.

Apple Bloom dragged Scootaloo off to the side as Sweetie Belle took center.

“I suppose it’s my turn..” Sweetie Belle scanned over the members, looking for the meekest of the group. “Silver Spoon! Why don’t you come up.”

Silver Spoon timidly got up from her spot and went up to Sweetie Belle. The two stared each other down for a second too long until Sweetie snapped back to the present.

“Right!” She shook her head. ”Just like they did before.” Sweetie bowed, Silver copying her. The two put their fists out unsurely. They both simultaneously swung a fist forward, Sweetie her left and Silver her right, which clashed into each other with an uncomfortable crack. The both of them immediately began to tear up and retreated to their spots as their respective hands went limp and sore.

“Oh for fuck’s sake this is embarrassing. Apple Bloom! Fight me bitch!” Diamond Tiara shot up from her spot.

“Now who the hell do ‘ya think you are telling me what to do?”

“Fine, don’t. Guess you’re just too much of a wuss.” Diamond stared her down smugly.

Apple Bloom felt her fists tighten involuntarily. “Ok bitch, you asked for this.” she walked up with her fists out.

“Damn right I did.” Diamond Tiara followed suit.

Apple Bloom immediately shot a fist towards Diamond’s head, which she narrowly dodged. Diamond retaliated with a hard shot to Apple Bloom’s side, making her stumble back a bit before she pulled her arm back and sent it flying forward, clocking Diamond across her face. Diamond Tiara was sent tumbling down. She shot a glare at Apple Bloom as blood trickled out her nose. Before anyone could react, Diamond Tiara pounced forward and tackled Apple Bloom to the floor, beginning to wail on her.

“Hey! Hey! Break it up!” Sweetie Belle stepped forward cautiously, attempting to stop the fight.

“No! I got- OW- this! I can- SON OF A- I can take ‘er!” Apple Bloom said between strikes. She found an opening between Diamond’s punches and managed to push her back and immediately follow up with a strike to the chest. Diamond stumbled and hit the floor with a thud. Apple Bloom got to her feet with a wobble and stood over Diamond Tiara. With the small amount of energy she had left, she held her hand out towards Diamond. Diamond Tiara stared at it for a second before reluctantly holding onto it. Apple Bloom pulled Diamond to her feet and weakly shook her hand.

“Good match Diamond.” Apple Bloom said through heavy breaths.

“..whatever.” Diamond harshly pulled her hand back before returning to her spot, Apple Bloom looking on with slight disappointment.

“Ok..” Apple Bloom gave a heavy sigh. “I think that’ll be all for today. It was a very… productive, evening.” She gave a glance to Scootaloo, still laying on the floor. “Thanks for coming and uh.. I hope to see y’all next week.”

The lineup on the floor all got up and collected their belongings, murmuring to themselves as they exited.

“Didn’t even get to do anything fun.” Cozy Glow hissed to herself, being the first to leave.

“Hey DT I really think my hand’s broken.” Silver Spoon winced.

“I don’t want to hear it.” Diamond dismissed as they both made their way out.

“Hey Bloom if you and your friends here need any uh, serious medical care and all’at don’t be scared to ring me up y’know. Sorry about that cheap shot Scoots.” Babs paused on her way out.

“It’s good.” Scootaloo gave a thumbs up from the floor, Babs returning the gesture as she closed the door.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle leaned against the wall and slid to both sides of Scootaloo, all three releasing a heavy sigh in sync.

“Well that was a shit show.” Apple Bloom said bluntly.

“Honestly? Better than expected. I was anticipating at least two concussions.” Sweetie Belle admitted.

“That was badass. At least the parts I was able to stand for.” Scootaloo beamed.

“The only part you were up for was when you got folded by Babs.” Apple Bloom pointed out.

“Hell yeah it was.”

“Oh, hey, Apple Bloom, you uh, you got a black eye there.” Sweetie meekly pointed at Apple Bloom.

“Do I now, that’s gonna be hard to explain. How’s ‘ya hand holdin’ up?” Apple Bloom pointed back to Sweetie.

“It hurts. Hurts like hell, actually. If Rarity sees it she’ll probably never let me do anything ever again. But yknow, could be worse.” Sweetie gave a small smile. “Do you think you can stand up Scootaloo?”

“I’ll violently throw up if I do, so I’m gonna lay here for like, an hour, or two.”

“That sounds nice.” Sweetie Belle peacefully shut her eyes and leaned her head back.

“Good idea. I’ll text Applejack that we’re staying over at Scoot’s house. That should cover us.” Apple Bloom copied Sweetie Belle.

“Sleepover.. yay!” Scootaloo quietly cheered.

_______________________________________________

WEDNESDAY - DIAMOND TIARA’S ROOM - 6:15 PM

“So.. what’d you think of that fight club?” Silver Spoon peered up from her science homework.

Diamond Tiara shot a glance back before returning to her math work. “It was fine.”

“Cool, cool.. are you gonna go back next week?”

“Are you?”

“Uh, yeah, I was planning on it.”

“Then, sure, why not.”

“Ok, cool…”

The two sat in uncomfortable silence for a moment, Silver trying to start a sentence several times before finally biting the bullet.

“Hey DT is.. is something wrong? You’ve been all moody since we left school, er, more than usual, at least.”

“Uh, no, no. It’s just.. just this math, y'know, so boring.” Diamond uncharacteristically stumbled through her words.

“Oh, ok.” Silver said simply. She could tell Diamond wasn’t being entirely truthful. She could also tell whatever was bothering Diamond, she wasn’t ready to talk about. So she decided to let it rest for now and unpack it later. But for the time being, she had to get this damn chemistry sheet done…

Rule 2: There Is No Rule #2

WEDNESDAY - YEARBOOK ROOM - MEETING #2 - 3:00 PM

“Ok, wow, didn’t uh.. didn’t expect you all to come back.” Apple Bloom found herself once again speaking in front of the same four people sitting in a row on the floor. “A-anyway, happy to see y’all again. Now, we’ve heard some of your complaints about a ‘lack of involvement’.” Apple Bloom’s eyes wandered to Cozy Glow, who returned the look with an innocent fluttering of her lashes. “So we’ve made sure everyone will get a turn today. You’re all gonna come on up one by one and choose a sparring partner for the day, does that sound good?”

A chorus of indifferent grunts answered Apple Bloom.

“That sounds wonderful Ms. Bloom!” Cozy Glow’s high pitched voice echoed out.

“Please don’t call me that. Alrighty now, who wants to come up first?”

Everyone stood eerily still, all but Cozy of course, whose hand was eagerly waving in the air.

“I figured as much..” Apple Bloom sighed. “Alright Cozy, come on up.” Apple Bloom wandered over to Sweetie and Scoots.

“Oh gosh, I just don’t know who to choose! Everyone looks so strong, I dunno if I’m cut out for this..”

“That’s ok now, maybe I can choose for-“

“I choose Silver Spoon!” Cozy cutoff Apple Bloom.

“What? But I thought you just..” Silver Spoon sputtered.

“Come on up silly, what’re you waiting for?”

Silver gulped and cautiously approached Cozy.

“I dunno girls.. I’m starting to think ‘fight club’ ain’t exactly the winning idea we thought it was.” Apple Bloom said as she sat in between her best friends.

“I’m enjoying it.” Scootaloo said matter-of-factly.

“Well I knew you would, but I’m just not seeing how this is getting us any closer to our Cutie Marks.” Apple Bloom said.

“Wha?… Right! Yeah, that’s why we’re doing this. I-I knew that.” Sweetie Belle flashed an overcompensating grin.

“Ugh, ya see what I mean! Maybe it’s time to change course..”

“HEY!” A loud yell cutoff Apple Bloom’s train of thought. “Get your fucking hands off her you freak!” Diamond shouted as she marched towards Cozy, who was currently driving her shoe into the side of Silver Spoon’s face.

“Golly, do you wanna play too Ms. Tiara?” Cozy playfully asked.

“Alright you little creep..” Diamond growled as she rolled her sleeves. She charged forward and shoved Cozy back as hard as she could. Cozy Glow held onto Diamond’s collar and pulled her back with her, sending the two into a back and forth tussle that eventually brought them to the floor, with petty pot shots ensuing.

“On second thought, I’m starting to see the appeal.” Apple Bloom relaxed a bit. “Actually pretty entertaining when it ain’t one’a your friends getting their shit kicked in.”

“Should we stop them? My allowance isn’t gonna cover getting sued by Diamond’s dad.” Sweetie Belle winced.

Scootaloo waved a dismissive hand. “Nah, they’re fine. In fact..” they pulled a pencil box out of their backpack and emptied the contents as they got to their feet. “Place your bets now! Who’s gonna come out on top?!” Scootaloo waved the box around.

“What in the sam hill are ya doing?!” Apple Bloom whisper yelled.

“Being engaging! Gotta give people a reason to come back, y’know?”

“With gambling?!”

“I’ve got ten on Cozy.” Babs dropped a bill in the pencil box. “And this is betting, way different than gambling.”

“She’s got you there.” Sweetie Belle pointed out.

“How about you girls, who’re you willing to wage on?” Scootaloo waved the box back and forth over Bloom and Sweetie, donning their best shit eating grin.

“All I’ve got is three dollars and two nickels. Just put it on Cozy I guess.” Sweetie Belle dropped her savings into the box.

“Sweetie!” Apple Bloom shouted, appalled.

“What?! You know I hate getting left out!”

“Ugh, what’ever. Look, I’m putting one dollar in on Diamond, only ‘ta shut ‘ya up.” Apple Bloom slipped the bill in.

“I’ll take it!” Scootaloo clasped the box closed.

A heavy thud caught everyone’s attention, serving as a proverbial bell to end the match, as Diamond Tiara hit the floor, laying opposite to Silver Spoon. Cozy Glow spat out a shot of blood as she stared down at the two. Without anything but a huff she returned to her seat on the floor. Babs took a couple precautionary scooches away from her.

“Yowch, tough break Apple Bloom.” Scootaloo snickered as they returned Babs’ and Sweetie’s money.

Apple Bloom was too distracted by Diamond Tiara’s borderline unconscious state to notice Scoot’s blatant thievery.

“Oh shitshitshitshit!!” Apple Bloom scrambled to her feet and quickly hauled Diamond Tiara over her shoulders, practically dragging her out of the room.

“Hey! Wait up!” Sweetie Belle followed suit, struggling to lift Silver Spoon. “Scootalooyou’reinchargewhilewe’regonekbye!” Sweetie rushed out the door.

Scootaloo stood silently, the slow dawning of realization creeping over as they looked at their only two options for a sparring partner.

“Aw shit.”

____________________________________

WEDNESDAY - THE HALLS OF HIGH SCHOOL - MEETING #2 - 3:34 PM

“Where are you even going?!” Sweetie asked as she followed Apple Bloom with Silver Spoon leaning on her shoulder.

“I don’t know! Im looking for a place where we can check on them!” Apple Bloom hurriedly explained as she carried Diamond.

“We better turn around then, cause the nurse’s office is the other way.” Sweetie began to change direction.

“Are you crazy?! Silver’s missing two of her damn front teeth, we can’t explain that to the nurse without getting damn near incarcerated!” Apple Bloom objected.

“Where the hell do you wanna go then?!” Sweetie Bell began to crumble under the anxiety.

“Ummm.. uhhhh…. there!” Apple Bloom pointed to the bathrooms. “No one’ll bother us there!”

Apple Bloom rushed off with Diamond Tiara. Sweetie winced at the conditions of this plan but followed Bloom anyway, despite her better judgment.

The two settled down in the biggest stall and sat down their hazy club mates, quickly checking for any major marks and blemishes.

“Ok.. doesn’t look like they’re bleeding or nothing, and they’re still breathing, mostly.” Apple Bloom took a breath.

“What were we thinking letting that psycho in!? Soon as we get back we gotta tell Cozy she’s out.” Sweetie said authoritatively.

“Pssch, have fun with that. I’ll be sure to write to ya’ in the hospital.” Apple Bloom scoffed. Sweetie lost all previous power in her posture at the thought of actually confronting Cozy Glow.

“So…. do ya’ think they’re gonna wake up soon?” Apple Bloom stared worriedly at Diamond and Silver.

“I hope so cause I am not spending another night here, I woke up like four times to the janitor trying to sweep me up.” Sweetie shuddered.

“Well…. w-with that hair.. can.. can you blame him?” Diamond Tiara’s eyes flickered as she slowly came back to full consciousness.

“Are you kidding me?” Sweetie deadpanned.

“Oh thank goodness you’re awake! Quick, how many fingers am I holding up?” Apple Bloom sat up and shot up three of her fingers.

“Tell me how many I’m holding up.” Diamond shot up the bird as she shakily got to her feet and pushed Apple Bloom out of her way. She took a couple wobbly steps towards the bathroom exit before stumbling and falling against a wall.

“C’mon, let me help ya’ now.” Apple Bloom came to Diamond’s side and tried to support her arm.

“I’m fucking fine! Just leave me and let me go kick that freak’s ass!” Diamond waved Bloom away as she stumbled a little bit further.

“Ugh… where.. am I? What’s going on Sweaty.. Ball..?” Silver Spoon slurred as she came to.

“Silver Spoon!” Sweetie’s eyes lit up with relief. “You got hurt pretty bad, er, not to say you didn’t put up a good fight! Eh heh, we just took you to the bathroom to see if you were alright.”

“Oh, t-thanks.. did I really do good in that fight? Cause I feel like I went out pretty fast.” Silver questioned.

“Oh, yeah, totally!” Sweetie flashed her most convincing fake smile. “You really showed that Cozy Glow what for.” She chuckled awkwardly.

“Woah.. I’m so cool..” Silver stated in a dizzy stir.

“I SAID I DON’T NEED FUCKING HELP!!” Diamond shouted, her voice echoing in the small room.

“You can barely walk! Like hell you don’t need help, now hold my goddamn hand!” Apple Bloom stomped her foot and yelled back.

“In your dreams farm girl, I’d rather get caught dating Snips than holding your muddy hand.” Diamond dismissed the offer and staggered forward.

“Ugh, I really, REALLY, didn’t wanna do this..” Apple Bloom sighed. She rolled her sleeves up and swiftly hauled Diamond over her shoulder.

“HEY! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!” Diamond yelled in appalled shock.

“This is just as embarrassing for me as it is for you.” Apple Bloom grumbled.

“I HIGHLY DOUBT THAT!” Diamond whined as she weakly pounded her fists on Apple Bloom’s back.

“We should probably follow them. I mean, unless you wanna stay here together…?” Sweetie told Silver.

“….has anyone told you you’d make a cute horse?” Silver tilted her head with a glazed look in her eyes.

Sweetie dropped her head and sighed. “Y’know, no one ever has.” She promptly stood up and dragged Silver back to the club room.

____________________________________

“Babs! How’s about we go for round eight!” Scootaloo spat out a bit of blood nonchalantly.

“Uhm, are ya sure? You’re getting pretty fucked up not gonna lie.” Babs whispered in concern.

“Listen up I’m not fighting that thing over there so just start kicking my shit in already.” Scootaloo pleaded.

Before Scootaloo could get their shit kicked in again, the club room door swung open, Apple Bloom stepping in with Diamond still over her shoulder.

“Club dismissed.” Apple Bloom commanded flatly before dropping Diamond on her ass.

“Ow! Watch it you clutz!” Diamond complained.

“Oh thank god.” Scootaloo whispered to themselves as they got ready to leave.

“Ah darn! And just when we were having fun.” Cozy solemnly said aloud.

“Yeah, don’t think I’m letting you kick us out before I get to pound her face in.” Diamond confronted Apple Bloom.

“I don’t got time for all this squabbling, if you wanna go fight do it behind the Denny’s like normal people.” Apple Bloom waved them away.

“Gosh you can be such a meanie Ms. Bloom! I thought that was Diamond’s job!” Cozy whined as she turned to leave.

Diamond growled under her breath as her hand instinctively clenched into a fist. She quickly whirled around and threw her fist forward, striking Cozy in the back of the head. Cozy stumbled a bit before rolling her neck and facing Diamond. She did nothing but snicker to herself as she raised her fists. This only annoyed Diamond further.

The two threw themselves into their second ugly fight of the day, pulling at hairs and pounding fists where need be.

“Hey! I said we were done here now!” Apple Bloom broke the two up and pushed them away. “I swear, I’ve cleaned pigs with better behavior than you tw-“ Apple Bloom was unceremoniously cut off by Cozy’s fist colliding with her face.

Babs and Scootaloo went silent as they darted eyes between each other. Diamond stared with a blank shock on her face, before uncontrollably bursting into laughter. Apple Bloom rubbed her cheek and she stared at Diamond with a betrayed anger in her eyes.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! …well I’m not, but still you gotta admit that was hilarious!” Diamond tried to regain composure.

Apple Bloom covered the anger on her face with a playful smirk. “I’ll give ya’ something to laugh about.” She said before picking up Diamond by the legs tumbling to the floor with her.

“Uhh.. hello? I was trying to make this club actually fun, can we get back to that?” Cozy tried to gain the room’s attention back.

Bloom and Diamond continued to tussle on the floor, uncontrollably laughing as they took petty pot shots at each other.

“Am I the only one that feels like they shouldn’t be watching this?” Scootaloo whispered to Babs.

“No no I get it, it’s like watching two wild animals tryna kill each other before they mate.” Babs responded.

“I would’ve used literally any other comparison but, yeah.” Scoot said.

The two took a few final shots before weakly getting to their feet, still giggling under their breath at it all. As they stood up they locked eyesight with each other for a few seconds. The room went silent. They exchanged a few labored breaths before their minds went blank and eyes went shut as they fell towards each other, firmly planting lips together.

Sweetie Belle and Silver Spoon collapsed into the room. “Oh hey! They finally opened that kissing girls club!” Silver said excitedly.

Rule #3: You Do Not Talk About Kissing Girls Club

WEDNESDAY - YEARBOOK ROOM - MEETING #2 - 3:49 PM

Diamond Tiara’s eyes shot open, she pulled away from Apple Bloom and promptly punched her in the face. Apple Bloom held her cheek with a stunned expression.

“Did I deserve that?” She questioned, genuinely confused.

“I-I don’t know.” Diamond Tiara answered with the same amount of confusion. She hurriedly grabbed her belongings and ran out the room, practically jumping over Sweetie and Silver. Apple Bloom quickly followed after.

Everyone was at a loss.

“…let’s.. call that a day.” Scootaloo broke the silence.

————————————————————

THURSDAY - BACKSEAT - 7:10 AM

“Hey Sweets did you do Mr. Sunburst’s history homework from yesterday? I was gonna do it but I found this video of birds on skateboards so I was kinda on that for a while.” Scootaloo asked as they stepped into the back of Rarity’s car.

“That’s really the most pressing matter to you right now.” Sweetie Belle said flatly.

“Uhh, yeah? Those birds were awesome, what else would I wanna talk about?” Scootaloo questioned.

Sweetie widened her eyes and gestured with her hands, finding it hard to not find her insinuation obvious. Scootaloo just raised their shoulders and made a face that said “I’m still stuck on the birds tbh”. Sweetie sighed and cusped her fingers together in a duck bill shape, tapping both her hands together while making kissy noises. Scootaloo’s eyes widened in unease.

“Like.. right here? You could at least ask me out first.” Scootaloo politely declined.

“What? No! It’s- UGH!” Sweetie fell back in her seat in frustration.

“I have always said you were a bit subpar at charades, dear.” Rarity commented from the driver’s seat.

“Here, see if you can get this.” Scootaloo said before cusping their fingers together in a duck bill shape and tapping them together while making kissy noises.

“THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I JUST DID!” Sweetie yelled in exasperation.

“No it’s not! You were doing “Scootaloo will you please kiss me” I was doing “that time Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara kissed yesterday”, it’s completely different.” Scootaloo explained.

“Even I got that one Sweetie.” Rarity added.

“Thats- I ju- y- we- UGH!” Sweetie Belle sputtered out some scattered gibberish before dropping her head into her hands.

“Hey speaking of, I haven’t really heard from her since then. She was all quiet the rest of the day and she didn’t respond to any of the skateboarding bird videos I sent.” Scootaloo pondered.

“I just hope she’s doing ok..” Sweetie solemnly said with a sigh.

“We have arrived ladies! Now you two have a good day today, and don’t forget to catch me up on all your tasty drama!” Rarity announced as they pulled up the school’s entrance. They all exited the vehicle and regrouped with their respective friend groups. Or, at least Rarity did.

————————————————————

THURSDAY - SCHOOL ENTRANCE - 7:16 AM

“…maybe she’s just late.” Sweetie Belle suggested.

The two present members of the CMC were at the group’s usual meeting area they reconvened to at the beginning of each day, with a certain overall clad girl missing this time.

“She lives five minutes away from school, I don’t think it’s possible for her to be late.” Scootaloo pointed to the visage of Sweet Apple Acres in the distance.

“Oh. Right.” Sweetie said, a hint of worry in her voice.

The two stood around for a bit after, hoping Apple Bloom would suddenly appear at the last second. Scootaloo’s eyes wandered aimlessly before landing on a scene that was becoming all too familiar. They tapped Sweetie Belle’s shoulder and directed her attention to Silver Spoon, who was also standing alone.

“That’s just sad to look at.” Scootaloo commented.

“Should we go see if she’s alright?” Sweetie suggested.

“Yeah, but you’ll have to do most of the talking, I only have a D in psychology.” Scootaloo said.

The two approached Silver Spoon, who quickly readjusted her demeanor.

“W-what do you two want?” Silver tried her best to sound standoffish.

“We’re just seeing how you are, is Diamond not here?” Sweetie responded, well, sweetly.

“…No, she’s not. She hasn’t been responding to any of my messages since yesterday..” Silver opened up a bit.

“Same here with Apple Bloom..” Sweetie said worriedly.

Scootaloo took notice of the dwindling energy among the two and decided to step in with their special brand of wisdom.

“Hey, they’re both probably going through a lot of funky emotions right now. If they wanna take a day off, who are we to sit here and psychoanalyze them for it?“ Scootaloo put it as they saw it.

“Y-yeah, they’ll be back tomorrow. We just gotta give them time.” Silver Spoon sniffled as she wiped the tears forming in her eyes.

“Exactly. Oh! I know what’ll make you feel better, have you seen those skateboarding bird videos?” Scootaloo lit up.

As if on cue, the school bell rang, signaling everyone to make their way to their first periods. The three entered the school halls together, hoping for a brighter rest of the day.

‘Just gotta give them time.’ Silver Spoon thought to herself.

————————————————————

THURSDAY - SWEET APPLE ACRES - 9:10 AM

Apple Bloom stared at the ceiling. Back against her bed. Occasionally glancing at the phone to her side. Picking it up to check a notification.

Not her.

‘Of course she ain’t messagin’! Ya don’t just chase after someone to give them yer’ number and then expect them to call ya!’

Another notification. Check phone.

Not her.

‘Just forget it already, act like nothin’ happened.’

Check phone.

Not her.

‘Ya can’t do that, somethin’ did happen! Somethin’ big! Huge! Ya gotta do somethin’ about it. Ya gotta tell ‘er it was a mistake, that it didn’t mean a thing. Ya gotta, ya gotta, ya gotta, ya gott-‘

*KNOCK KNOCK*

The sound of a knock on her door broke Apple Bloom out of her spiral. The door peered open as Big Mac poked his head in.

“Just checking how you’re doing. Everything alright in here?” He asked.

“Eyup!” Apple Bloom answered with the phoniest smile she could muster.

Big Mac simply looked at her and raised an eyebrow. Apple Bloom stared back, feeling a hole burning right through her facade.

“….Nope, everything’s not alright.” Apple Bloom crumbled with a sigh.

Big Mac walked over and dropped next to her on the bed. “C’mon now, tell me what’s goin’ on.”

“I.. I k-kissed a girl..” Apple Bloom confessed. “And gave her my number..”

“Oh. Well ain’t that something.” Big Mac said to himself.

“I just feel so stupid! I don’t even know how it happened! We were just standing there and.. and then…” Apple Bloom elaborated.

“Well, do ya’ like this girl?” Big Mac questioned.

“Ugh! I’m not even sure about that!” Apple Bloom groaned as she fell back onto her bed. “I don’t think I can ever show my face to anyone ever again.”

“Hmm, well, the way I see it..” Big Mac started as he laid back onto the bed. “..you and this girl are gonna have to have a serious talk about this. Who is this girl anyhow?”

“…D-Diamond Tiara…” Apple Bloom answered under her breath, honestly hoping her brother couldn’t hear her.

Big Mac’s eyes went wide. He sat back up and patted Apple Bloom on the head. “Eyup. A long, serious talk.” With that, he exited the room.

Apple Bloom sat at the edge of her bed, contemplating Mac’s words.

‘Just talk to her… I.. just gotta ta-‘

Another notification.

————————————————————

THURSDAY - THE RICH HOUSEHOLD - 9:10 AM

Diamond Tiara stared at the ceiling. Back against her bed. Occasionally glancing at the phone to her side. Picking it up to write a message.

Not yet.

‘You can’t text her! She just chased after you to give you her number and then expected you to call them!’

Write message.

Not yet.

‘Forget it, just act like nothing happened.’

Write message.

Not yet.

‘No, you can’t do that, something did happen! Something crazy! Insane! You have to do something. Tell her you’re not interested, though still flattered. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta, you gott-‘

*KNOCK KNOCK*

The sound of a knock on her door broke Diamond Tiara out of her spiral. The door peered open as Filthy Rich poked his head in.

“Just checking in before I head off to work. That fever still botherin’ you?” He asked.

“What? Oh! Uh, y-yeah, still- still there.” Diamond fumbled a bit.

“Oh, my poor princess. You stay hydrated now, and get plenty of rest.” He advised as he closed the door.

“Wait!” Diamond called before the door shut. Filthy stopped in his track and stepped back in to hear what she had to say. “Umm.. I… I.. need, your help, with something..”

“Oh? What is it dear?” Filthy walked over and sat on her bed.

“Well.. well, you know how Silver can be with all her drama, and well, she uh, had her first kiss yesterday, w-with a girl and.. she’s not sure if she actually likes her and doesn’t know what to do about it..” Diamond explained half-truthfully.

“Hmm. That is a toughie..” Filthy put a hand to his chin. “Well, back in my day, your first kiss was usually your truest, I mean, just look at me and your mom!” He laughed to himself. “So maybe Silver’s brain might not know how she feels, but I’d bet her heart does. You can tell her that’s a Rich original right there.”

“It’s corny, but it’s something. Thanks da- wait weren’t you like thirty-seven when you met mom?” Diamond said.

“Oops looks like I’m gonna be late I better go love you princess!” Filthy rushed out the door.

Diamond Tiara sat at the edge of her bed, contemplating her father’s words.

‘My heart knows… My heart knows.‘

Write a message.

————————————————————

THURSDAY - SUGARCUBE CORNER - 10:30 AM

‘This is where she said to meet right? Did I show up early? Did she cancel? Was her phone stolen and that message was actually from a notorious kidnapper that’s been on the run for forty years?! MAYBE-‘

Apple Bloom’s frantic thoughts were cut short by the ringing of the bell at the front door. Looking up, she saw the violet-haired girl she was anticipating finally enter the diner. Apple Bloom’s whole body tensed as Diamond Tiara took notice of her and approached her booth. Diamond took her seat across from Bloom. The two sat silent for a moment or two before taking a deep sigh and opening their mouths.

“We gotta talk.” They said in unison.

They both stopped in surprise before sharing a light chuckle between each other. As their laughter died down, Diamond began to speak.

“So. We kissed.”

“Y-yes. We did.”

“Did you, umm….. did you, like it?”

“I.. think so.”

“Hm.”

“Did, you like it?”

“..I’m not sure. I mean, I didn’t not like it.”

“Better than nothin’, I suppose.”

“So, does this mean we’re like, a thing now?”

Apple Bloom pondered Diamond’s question. She definitely wasn’t apposed to the idea, but she wasn’t sure she was ready to call it that just yet.

“I don’t think so.. I mean, unless you want us to be a thing now.”

“Yeah, not sure about that one. Though I’m not sure about any of this really.”

Diamond’s eyes drifted away as she sunk a bit into her seat. Apple Bloom noticed the change in Diamond’s demeanor and reached across the table to take her hands into her own.

“Hey now, there really ain’t anything wrong with what we did. There’s no reason for us to be actin’ up so much over it.”

“I know, I know, it’s just.. ugh! Why do I feel so stupid about it!”

“Oh boy tell me about it, I mean what was I thinkin’ runnin’ after ya yesterday? I wouldn’t blame ya for never talkin’ to me after that.” Apple Bloom laughed at herself.

Diamond Tiara laughed along as she thought back on the situation. “Oh my god, I literally punched you in the face! That was insane!”

Their laughter became more uproarious and joyful as they realized how absurd all of this has been so far. The two girls spent the afternoon at Sugarcube Corner, reminiscing over the past week and getting to actually know each other for the first time. A couple hours and an ordering of dessert later, the girl’s time together came to an end.

“Y’know Diamond, we ought to do this more often. I think I’m free on Thursday if you wanna hang out again.” Apple Bloom offered as they both exited the diner.

“You mean like a date?” Diamond responded slyly, a cheeky smirk on her face.

Apple Bloom’s face immediately went as red as her namesake. “Wha- I- I ju-“

“Cool it farm girl, I’m just messing with you.” Diamond playfully hit Bloom’s shoulder. “Though, it totally would be a date.”

“Well then I guess it is one, see ya there?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.”

With their impromptu first date at an end, Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara bid farewell. On their respective walks back home, they both had a final thought to themselves.

‘Wow, I expected that to go WAY worse.’

Rule 4: Expand, Expand, Expand

FRIDAY - CANTERLOT HIGH SCHOOL - 7:15 AM

“C’mon, C’mon, C’mon, C’mon, C’mon..” Sweetie Belle rapidly tapped her foot as she stood outside CHS, eagerly awaiting something.

“Hiya girls! How have y’a-“

“OH MY GOD WHERE WERE YOU YESTERDAY I WAS SO WORRIED AND I MISSED YOU AND I’M SO HAPPY YOU’RE OKAY NOW!!” Sweetie practically threw herself onto Apple Bloom, immediately breaking down into a sobbing mess.

“Hey Apple Bloom.” Scootaloo greeted nonchalantly.

“Uh, hey there. Y’all know I was only out for a day, right?” Apple Bloom inwardly cringed at the amount of Sweetie Belle tears that now coated her attire.

“Yeah! And you didn’t answer any of our messages! You can’t do that to people!” Sweetie Belle emotionally chastised.

“Right.. I’m real sorry ‘bout that. I was a little, uh, caught up… with something.” Apple Bloom awkwardly tried to tiptoe around the topic.

“Skateboarding bird compilation? I’ve been there.” Scootaloo gave their condolences.

“What could’ve possibly been more important than letting your best friends know you’re ok?” Sweetie Belle criticized some more.

“I.. I was.. on a uhh……… a date.” Apple Bloom whispered as low as she could without going completely silent.

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo could only stare with stunned shock on their faces as they stood completely still.

“Are you.. are you oka-“

“YOU WERE WHAT?!”

————————————————————

FRIDAY - CANTERLOT HIGH SCHOOL - 7:15 AM

Silver Spoon stood alone outside the entrance to CHS, periodically checking her phone to make her seem like less of a loner weirdo. After many instances of lowering her phone and scanning her surroundings, Silver was finally met with the sight of Diamond Tiara arriving to school.

“DT!” Silver called out excitedly.

“Good morning Silver Spoon.” Diamond Tiara passed by and entered the school with a suspiciously brisk walk.

“Hey, hey wait up! Where were you yesterday?” Silver inquired as she caught up with Diamond.

“I was just at home. Doing nothing important.” Diamond lied through her teeth.

“Oh no, nuh uh, you can’t pull that on me. I know you better than I know myself, which my therapist said I need to work on, so I know when you’re trying to lie to me!” Silver Spoon accused.

Diamond murmured some incomprehensible noises in an attempt to respond before huffing in defeat. She quickly checked to make sure nobody was near and pulled Silver Spoon into the nearest room.

“You can’t tell another soul about this, this is for me and you and her to know. Do you understand?” Diamond got insanely serious.

“Of course I understa- wait who’s ‘her’?” Silver questioned.

Diamond took a deep breath and whispered to Silver. “Yesterday, I.. was.. onadatewithapplebloom.” She blurted out.

Silver’s eyes slowly grew as the words registered in her brain. “You were WHA-“

Diamond practically shoved her hand down Silver Spoon’s throat. “Shhhh shut the hell up! We.. actually kinda sorta hit it off.. so please don’t mess this up for me!”

“Yor wigh-“ Silver pulled Diamond’s hand out her mouth. “You’re right, I promise I won’t say anything to anybody, you have my word.”

“Alright, thank you. Now let’s get out of here befo-“

The room was suddenly filled with light as the door swung open. The two girls stood frozen in fear.

“Ugh, I told you the broom closet was gonna be taken.” Lyra Heartstrings groaned.

“Sorry about that, we’ll let you two finish.” Bon Bon politely shut the door.

————————————————————

WEDNESDAY - YEARBOOK ROOM - MEETING #3 - 3:00 PM

“Howdy y’all! Unfortunately Babs couldn’t be here today so… uhh, what’re you doing here?” Apple Bloom stopped her introduction in confusion. Before her sat two new members she doesn’t remember inviting.

“Hey AB!! It’s sho cool you have your own fight club, my parentsh would never let me have one!” Twist greeted Apple Bloom excitedly.

The boy beside Twist was too engrossed in his game to notice Apple Bloom had even begun speaking. Twist gave him a little nudge to notify him the meeting had started.

“Huh? Oh shit are we starting?” He cleared his throat. “Yo, it’s me Button Mash, but you probably know me better as SaiyanKnight98 on YouTube, PSN, XBLive, Steam, Pictocha-“

“Yeah yeah whatever, what the hell are ya’ doing here?” Apple Bloom questioned.

“Oh gosh, are we not allowed to invite friends? I’m sorry Ms. Bloom, I was just having so much fun here and I wanted to share it with everyone I knew! I promise it won’t happen again.” Cozy Glow flashed her most innocent smile.

“We’re friends?” Button Mash said to himself.

“Oh. That’s.. wonderful.. Cozy, thank you so much for that.” Apple Bloom said through gritted teeth, using all her will power to not strangle the girl right then and there. “Scootaloo, why don’t ya’ introduce our, ‘new members’, to how things work ‘round here.”

Scootaloo saluted in understanding as they made their way to the front of the group. Apple Bloom took this opportunity to sit next to Diamond.

“So.. where you wanna go tomorrow?” Apple Bloom asked.

“I know just the place, there’s this adorable little cafe my dad used to take me to all the time. Their pie is to die for, you have to try it!” Diamond answered enthusiastically.

“Now that sounds good, I bet it’s not as good as my granny’s pie though.” Apple Bloom playfully gloated.

As the newly coupled chattered off together about their incoming date, Silver Spoon looked on longingly before sighing to herself and staring off into nothing. Sweetie Belle took notice of the bespectacled girl’s solemn demeanor and quietly scooched to her side.

“So, I never thought they’d hook up, huh?” Sweetie started.

Silver jumped a bit in her spot from the start of an unexpected conversation. “Oh, y-yeah, never could’ve guessed that one.” She softly laughed.

They sat silently for a moment, fingers fidgeting and eyes darting in an effort to keep the conversation alive.

“So… does this mean we’re like, cool now? Or something?” Sweetie asked.

“I guess. If I’m honest I never really had anything against any of you guys. I just.. I..” Silver Spoon sighed in embarrassment. “Not to sound cliche, but I was just following Diamond around. I guess I never said anything because I didn’t want to fight with her and, lose her, in some way.”

“I understand, kinda..” Sweetie cringed a little inside thinking back on everything Diamond and Silver did to her and the CMCs. “Ok, I don’t, but I don’t hold anything against you if that makes you feel better.”

“Y-yeah, sure..” Silver responded, unsure how to take that comment.

Sweetie mentally kicked herself in the back of the head as Silver visibly grew more distant from her. ‘Stupid, stupid, stupid! Stop saying the worst thing possible for once!’

Sweetie delicately placed a hand on Silver’s shoulder, who shuddered a bit in response. She took her hand back and decided to cut the bullshit and just go for it.

“Sorry, about all that. It’s just, well, there’s this cute pop up at the mall tomorrow and I was wondering if maybe you.. wanted to check it out?” Sweetie fought all the doubt and anxiety in her to get this out to Silver. She was clearly taken aback by the offer, her eyes drifting off to nothing in particular as she went deep in thought.

“Why are you asking me? I’m sure Apple Bloom and Scootaloo would like to go.” Silver got a little instinctively defensive.

“Sure, they’ll say they’d like to go, but I know it’ll be too cutesy and soft for them to really enjoy.” Sweetie politely explained. “N-not to say you’re soft, or anything, I-I just thought like-“ She hurriedly sputtered before being cut off.

“Ok. I’ll go.” Silver said with a small smile. She had her reservations, but Sweetie Belle had never shown intentionally malicious intentions before. Besides, it’s not like she had anything else going on tomorrow.

Sweetie Belle practically beamed at this answer. She quickly wrote her number down and gave it to Silver before pulling her into a hug. “I can’t wait, you’re gonna love it!”

Silver’s brain immediately told her to pull away, but she almost instantly melted into the embrace, simply smiling without saying a word.

As the newly befriended chattered off together about their incoming hang out, Scootaloo was still trying to get Button Mash to understand the simple rules and customs of your average fight club.

“Ok ok wait. So wavedashing isn’t allowed?” Button Mash raised an eyebrow.

“WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THAT.” Scootaloo grit their teeth.

“I’m just saying, every other league allows it!” Button Mash defended himself.

“Woah, how many fight clubsh have you been in?” Twist tilted her head in amazement.

“Look! Just do the cool karate bow and start fighting already!” Scootaloo explained for the 50th time.

“I would but you guys don’t even have any set ups ready! Like where’s the controllers, the TV, I don’t even know what console we’re using.” Button pointed out.

“TV?? Controller- what’re yo- bitch this is a real fucking fight club! She’s gonna punch you in the face!” Scootaloo snapped.

“Well I’ll try to, no promisheshs.” Twist tried to not play herself up.

Button Mash burst into laughter. “That’s a good one! No but seriously what’re we doing here? ……….wait a minu-“

“GO!!” Scootaloo started the match.

Twist immediately pulled back and flung her fist forward, landing squarely in the middle of Button’s face, who was sent tumbling flat on his back.

“Now this is gonna be fun.” Cozy Glow laughed to herself as she watched from the sidelines. “C’mon Button! You can do this!” She cheered on in phony encouragement.

With renewed energy, Button staggered to his feet and reentered the fight. “Your cheers and support has given me a new sense of power! Thank you Cozy, my dear frie-“ Twist responded with a swift kick to the chest. Button was back on the floor, most definitely for good this time. Cozy was also now on the floor, in an uproarious fit of laughter.

“Wow! That wash sho totally aweshome! Good match Button!” Twist squealed.

“No proberm..” He groaned from the ground.

“Now that’s what I’m talking about! Am I a damn good teacher or what?” Scootaloo praised. “Oh! Maybe you can all start calling me sensei!”

“I don’t think I want to do that.” Twist said with blunt honesty.

“Yeah no I regretted it as soon as I said it HEY APPLE BLOOM I TAUGHT THEM HOW TO PUNCH EACH OTHER!” Scootaloo announced from across the room.

Apple Bloom visibly jumped in surprise from the sudden callout, which Diamond got a nice chuckle out of. She sighed and put her and Diamond’s talk on a brief pause. “Just give me a sec to deal with this, ‘kay?”

Apple Bloom made her way to the front of the room alongside Scootaloo. “Good goin’ Scoots, they sure did.. punch.. each other, y’know what this seems like a real great time to call this a day, that way we’re all on the same page next week. See y’all then!” She quickly rushed through her outro. As soon as she was done she ran back to Diamond to continue their flirty conversation. Sweetie Belle and Silver Spoon were also caught up with continuously chattering off with each other. Scootaloo watched as both duos made their way to the door with the rest of the club members.

“See you guys later!” Scootaloo blurted out with an awkward smile plastered on their face. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle turned around and gave a quick ‘See ya Scoots!’ while Diamond and Silver merely waved over their shoulders. Scootaloo sighed to themself and somberly picked up their things. They turned to Twist and decided to shoot their shot.

“You got plans for the day?” Scootaloo asked.

“Shorry Shcootaloo, I gotta practicshe my moves for next meeting, it’sh gonna be sho aweshome!” Twist spat her answer.

“Oh, well, you have fun with that.” Scootaloo said, hopefully successfully masking the disappointment in their voice. With that, Twist ran out of the room with a pep in her step. Scootaloo stood in the empty room, almost as if exiting would confirm to them that they really did have no one to turn to for the rest of the day. They took a deep sigh as they rubbed the water from their eyes, and took a step out.

Rule #5: Connections

THURSDAY - LUNCH PERIOD - 11:15 AM

Now, usually, Cozy Glow made sure to not interact with another soul as she made her way down the school halls. Today decided to not be usual.

“Yo Cozy-G, what was your PSN tag again? Is it the same on everything or do you like to change it up?” Button Mash asked as he followed the vertically-challenged girl.

Cozy felt her brain tap into the rarely used part of itself that incited fear as she gave Button a piercing gaze of confusion while he continued rambling on about whatever an ‘XBone’ is.

“Oh my god, there was this one guy at a local once that insisted his main was S-Tier potential when he was barely even C, and he had the gall to-“

“Bet’cha can’t beat me at the quiet game!” Cozy forcibly pinched his mouth shut.

He politely plucked Cozy’s hand off his face. “You’re right I can’t. Anyway I’m just tryna figure out what you wanna jump on tonight.”

“What I wanna WHAT!?”

“Y’know like some CS:GO, maybe a bit of 3rd Strike, whatever you’re feeling.”

“I’m feeling annoyed.” She muttered under her breath.

“Oh then you’d love League.”

“Listen Mr… Mutton Bash I wanna say it was? I’d love to keep talking about the game boy or whatever but fourth period starts soon so, y’know.” Cozy blew a raspberry to highlight her immense disappointment with this riveting conversation coming to an end.

“Oh shoot you’re right, thanks for the heads up!” Button yelled as he ran off to his next class.

Cozy sighed as if all possible energy she had left for the day was taken in that instant. She was just happy to finally be left alone with her own voice and her own thoughts.

Ding.

There’s that fear in her brain firing off again. Cozy reached for her phone and nearly screamed at what she saw.

‘I’ll be on mw2 aftr school. SaiyanKnight signing out ✌️’

How. How did he get her number. She doesn’t even have her parents on there. Well, she doesn’t even have parents at all but that’s besides the point. This worm must be dealt with. She must destroy all that he stands for. Or her name isn’t Cozy fucking Glow.

——————————————————————

THURSDAY - SCOOTALOO’S HOUSE - 3:48 PM

Scootaloo stepped into their home and dropped their backpack off their shoulder and to the floor. With their two closest friends off on dates, this was the first time in a long time that Scootaloo had an afternoon all to themselves, whether it was by choice or not. Scootaloo sighed as they stood in the doorway.

The whole afternoon to themselves.

——————————————————————

THURSDAY - CANTERLOT MALL - 5:04 PM

“EEEEE!There it is!” Sweetie squealed as the pop up shop entered her view. She held Silver’s hand and ran off. “Oh my gosh look at this one!” She said excitedly picking up the first piece of jewelry she saw. “Oh this would be just adorable on you!”

“Really? Isn’t it a little.. sweet?” Silver said skeptically as she inspected the earrings, little charms of what looked to be strawberry smoothies hanging off them.

Sweetie gave a smug look in response to Silver’s apprehension. “Please now, I’ve picked up some notes from my sister. I know a good accessory when I see one.” She held the charms over Silver’s ears to confirm her theory. “Yep, just as I thought. Totally adorable.”

Sweetie Belle opened her pocket book and pulled out her wallet.

“Oh Sweetie Belle, you really don’t have to.” Silver tried to save Sweetie’s bank account.

“Please, please. I insist.” Sweetie smiled. “Now, how much for these earrings?” She asked the clerk.

“$70.”

Sweetie clenched the wallet in her hand as a pained expression spread across her face. “…I guess the lawn needed to be mowed anyway.” She sighed as she handed over the needed amount.

With the transaction completed, Sweetie grabbed the jewelry and dropped it into Silver’s hands. Silver Spoon stared at it for a moment as it laid in her hands. She wasn’t entirely sure why she now owned it, or if she deserved to. She knew literally why but… why?? What had she done for this? She wasn’t sure if she’d ever entirely understand, or if she wanted to.

Locking the gift in her grip, Silver Spoon wrapped her arms under Sweetie’s and rested her head on the girl’s shoulder. Sweetie stumbled a bit in surprise before returning the hug passionately. The two softened a bit, meeting eye to eye. Sweetie raised her hand and wiped a forming tear off Silver’s cheek.

“So, where do you wanna go?”

——————————————————————

THURSDAY - SCOOTALOO’S HOUSE - 5:04 PM

“PAHAHAHAHA THIS SHOW IS HILARIOUS!” Scootaloo hollered at the television.

“I know right?! They just don’t make them like this anymore!” Scootaloo concurred.

“I wouldn’t go that far, I saw this new show recently tha-“

“Oh shut up Scootaloo no one asked you.” Scootaloo shot down Scootaloo’s attempt at playing devil’s advocate.

“Shh! Shh! This is my favorite part!” Scootaloo quieted the room.

The TV continued to show static, just as it had for the last hour and a half.

“Huh, I remember that being funnier the first time I watched it.”

——————————————————————

THURSDAY - CANTERLOT MALL - 5:28 PM

“Ok I’m ready!” Silver Spoon announced as she stepped out from behind a changing room curtain, dawning a short, poofy, royal blue dress. “So, how does it look?”

“Woah, it sure does look expensive.” Sweetie Belle commented.

“Hehe, thank you!” Silver smiled brightly. “Now it’s your turn!”

“Yeah! Wait, what?” Sweetie Belle questioned before Silver dropped an assortment of frilly, heavy, elaborate, and otherwise large price tag carrying garments into her arms.

Sweetie Belle worked her way through every last piece of apparel Silver Spoon had handpicked for her, said girl getting more and more giddy with every new fitting. The looks ranged from (relatively) simple combinations of varied pieces to full blown designer gala dresses that have no business being in sizes made for 14 year olds.

“Are you sure you’re not Rarity’s sister?” Sweetie Belle joked as she dragged the seven feet of silk trailing off the end of her current attire.

“Ok, so I might be a bit more into fashion design than I let on.” Silver Spoon laughed softly.

“You don’t plan on actually buying all of this, do you?” Sweetie Belle asked in concern.

“Oh definitely not, no way. I’m just trying to get a feel for your style. And besides daddy doesn’t let me spend more than ten-thousand a month.” Silver Spoon said like that was a given.

Sweetie Belle felt her world view twinge in pain at that last comment before her mind rewound to what Silver said before. “My style? Do I even have a style?”

“Everyone has a style honey, and let me just say yours is absolutely stunning. I suppose I’d call it a mix of vintage casual and decora lolita, with a hint of the usual girly aesthetic.” Silver explained in very succinct terms.

“I think those sounded good.” Sweetie Belle tried to not make it obvious she had no idea what Silver just said.

“Or in laymen’s terms, you’re like, really really cute.” Silver said, a hint of a blush creeping on her cheeks.

Sweetie Belle’s face similarly grew a deepening red upon hearing the compliment. She moved forward and smoothly put Silver’s hand into her own.

“Well, now that you know my style, do you maybe wanna head to your place and, I don’t know, design some clothes to go with it?” Sweetie Belle asked as she stepped closer and closer, leaving mere inches between her and Silver Spoon.

“Uh, y-yeah! Sure..” Silver Spoon gave an awkward smile as she lost control of the blush spreading on her face.

Sweetie Belle didn’t react to Silver’s answer, only continuing to close in. She blinked and realized just how close she got, feeling Silver’s breath brush past her neck. She quickly backed up and could only stare back at Silver’s eyes, the two too stunned to make a move. Finally the words processed in Sweetie’s head and she was able to speak again.

“W-well then we better g-get on out of here, aheh.” Sweetie stuttered uncontrollably as she paced for the exit. The store was then filled with the loud beeping of the anti-theft monitors. “Almost forgot to change! Silly me!”

——————————————————————

THURSDAY - SCOOTALOO’S HOUSE - 5:28 PM

“Okay, okay, hold it hold it.” Scootaloo directed as their pencil moved furiously in their sketchbook. They sat upon the edge of their bed, guiding the utensil in majestic curves, forever immortalizing the model before them in the confines of their sketchbook. A piece of such fidelity that if it were to be colorized it could be mistaken for a living photograph, awake with life and worn by love.

“Aaaaaaaand there!” Scootaloo excitedly flipped the sketch book around to present the finished piece to their artistic muse. The mirror in the corner of the room responded to the perfect replication of its likeness with a resounding silence.

“I knew you’d like it!”

‘…’

“Makes you look fat? Oh please, if anything I made you slimmer.”

‘…’

“Oh don’t flatter yourself pal, there’s a reason Susan left you.”

‘…’

“Shit, sorry, you’re right, I shouldn’t have gone there. Look we’re both friends here let’s just put this all behind us.”

‘…’

“Cool, so do you wanna go out for drinks or what?”

‘…’

“What?! You’re busy tonight too? You’re a mirror what the hell do you have to be busy for!”

‘…’

“Whatever, you never pay your have of the tab anyway.”

Scootaloo flopped back onto their bed, ready to give up on today and begin the next. They released a heavy sigh as they reflected on their past two hours of boredom.

“I wonder if this what being unemployed feels like.”

——————————————————————

FRIDAY - CANTERLOT HIGH SCHOOL - 7:15 AM

Cozy Glow was deep in thought. Methodically taking note of every face that entered her gaze. Categorizing each and every person by the clear flaws and fears they exhibited. There wasn’t a single soul at this school that she didn’t know how to destroy.

“Yo yo yo if it isn’t last name Glow first name Cozy!”

Except one.

“Hey why weren’t you on last night? I thought we were gonna get a good grinding sesh in.”

“Listen you mutant, I will not today, tomorrow, or ever want to-” Cozy stopped. The creeping feeling of a devilish plot entering her head. A truly evil, manipulative, selfish, and very un-friendship-of-her-ish kind of idea.

“Hey Cutting Gash.”

“Button Mash.”

“Bless you. You like playing games right?”

“Yeeeeesssss?” Button answered, very concerned on where this was going.

“Well I know a pretty cool game, but I don’t know, it might be too hard for you.”

“Too hard for me? Please, I beat Combat Evolved on legendary without ta-“

“Yeah yeah real cool, do you really think you’re up to it? It’s pretty hardcore.”

Cozy put her hand out, offering Button Mash the chance to give full allegiance to her. He stared at it for a moment as he contemplated how much he could really trust Cozy. She was a shifty, conniving, backstabbing, unforgiving tyrant, and she would no doubt drop him at a moment’s notice. But then an even scarier thought entered his head: if he turned down her challenge he’d look like a total pleb. Taking this into consideration, he smirked in misplaced confidence and took her hand in his, signing the proverbial devil’s contract.

Cozy laughed to herself. “Good choice, now get ready to have some fun.”

“What kinda fun we talkin’ here?” Button questioned what exactly Cozy’s definition of fun entailed.

“It’s really very simple! You just gotta get as many people as possible to join that nifty little fight club we’re in! Doesn’t that sound fun!” Cozy Glow put on her most endearing performance.

“Oh. It’s that kinda game. Are you sure you’re old enough to be going to high school?” Button was now severely less hyped.

“Aww c’mon! Bet’cha I can get more than you!” Cozy decided to dig deeper into his psyche.

“Ok, ok, I see you small stack. If it’s a contest you want, then it’s a contest you’ll lose!” Button gloated.

“Alrighty! We’ll meet up at the end of the day and see who won! Good luck frie- what did you call me.”

Button Mash had already ran off, both so he wasn’t late for first period and so he could get a quick head start. Cozy was in no rush to catch up as she snickered to herself.

‘He plays the stupid games and I win all the prizes.’

——————————————————————

FRIDAY - CANTERLOT HIGH SCHOOL - 7:40 AM

“Psst”

Her ear twitched at the noise. It had repeated several times throughout class now and she was hoping to ignore it but..

“Pssssst”

..It beats taking notes I guess.

“What is it that you wish to tell Trixie?!” The magically inclined girl whisper yelled as she turned to the source of her annoyance.

Two rows back and one table to her left sat the culprit.

“Do you wanna fight?” Button asked bluntly.

“To be entirely honest I would not mind punching you right now.” Admitted the candid and truthful Trixie.

“Cool! I got this club I’m in, y’know, nothing big or whatever, just a badass fight club. Meetings are every Wednesday in the yearbook room, but you didn’t hear that from me.” Button spilled the beans.

“Yes I did. You just said it. Who else would I have heard it from?”

“No it’s just- you- I didn’t- oh forget it just show up.”

——————————————————————

FRIDAY - CANTERLOT HIGH SCHOOL - 8:23 AM

“Hello there ma’am, do you think you can help me with this problem?”

Lyra Heartstrings looked to her side and saw a small girl handing her a math worksheet, the girl’s watery puppy dog eyes piercing her soul.

“Oh! Uhh, sure, though be warned math isn’t really my strong suit.” It was then that Lyra had a realization. “Why are you doing math in English class?”

“Well, I already finished today’s work, so I asked if I could get a head start on next week’s!”

“Uh-huh, very humble.” Lyra examined the worksheet and took note of the name written at the top. “So, ‘Cozy Glow’, what’s it about math that seems to stump ya?”

“It’s just so hard to keep track of all those tricky numbers!”

“Tell me about it, everybody I know has tried to teach me these tricks and stuff to help but none of them have really worked.” Lyra then remembered who she was talking to and their, assumingely, young age. “N-not that they won’t work for you! It’s just- the- well the- y’know it… just forget I said anything.”

“Already have!”

“Look I’m sorry kid, I don’t think I’m the tutor you’re looking for.” Lyra handed the paper back.

“Aww, don’t worry about it. I go to a study group after school in the yearbook room every Wednesday, I’m sure they’ll help me out!”

“I didn’t know there this school had study groups, how long has it been around?”

“Not very long I don’t think, why don’t ’cha come to the next meeting!”

“Hm, I just might have to take you up on that offer.” Lyra fistbumped Cozy.

“See ya there!”

——————————————————————

And so Cozy Glow and Button Mash spent the whole day discreetly (well, Cozy was discreet about it at least) indoctrinating new members. At the end of the day they met back up like they agreed upon.

“So Cozy-G, bet I totally crushed your score. Try beating seve-“

“Eleven. I got eleven people.”

Button zipped his mouth in slight embarrassment.

“Seven ain’t bad! More than I expected.” Cozy said that last part to herself.

“How do you know I wasn’t gonna say seventeen? Or even seventy!” Button got defensive.

Cozy gave him an unamused stare.

“Ok it was just seven.” Button dropped his head.

“It’s a start. And look on the bright side, this club is about to get real interesting.” Cozy smiled devilishly.

Everything was finally going her way, even if a certain propeller-hatted-nuisance was still sticking its head where it didn’t belong, it won’t be long until the residents of this school never forget the name Cozy Glow.