Unorthodox

by RunicTreetops

Rating: everyone
Tags: Romance, Anon, Comedy, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human, Mayor Mare
Length: 2792

After many years, Mayor Mare has finally found a special somepony. He just... doesn't happen to be a pony. Also, she has a lot going on right now.

Mayor Mare has been living in Ponyville for quite some time. Not as long as she'd have you believe, mind you, but a long time all the same. During this period, she had dreams and aspirations, and as far as she's concerned, she accomplished each and every one. But what do you do when you've already achieved all of your goals?

Well, she was pretty lonely. And although she obtained the exact career path she wanted for many moons, she had much less luck with the stallions in her life.

She never would have imagined that the solution would come in the form of a human, or what that solution would eventually lead to. The result is quite unorthodox.

Published 2023-11-07 05:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-11-07 05:10:01 UTC

Unorthodox

Mayor Mare groans as she places her quill down and leans back in her chair. It has been a long, LONG day. Being the mayor of Ponyville is rewarding work, but nopony said the paperwork part of the job would be fun. She tiredly stretches her aching joints, wincing when her legs and back pop. She's never been more ready to go home.

Slowly, she removes herself from her chair and walks around her large wooden desk. With a yawn, she gathers her belongings that she had left nearby and prepares to depart from the town hall. On her way out, she glances through a nearby window. The sun is beginning to set, and its rays are reflecting beautifully off of Princess Twilight Sparkle's fancy new "Castle of Friendship." It really is nice to look at, but it'd be better if it weren't one of the causes of her current headache.

She doesn't blame anypony for the sudden change, least of all Twilight herself. She did help save Equestria from Tirek, after all. That said, the destruction of Ponyville's library was already going to be a logistical nightmare for her. Throw in the sudden arrival of a castle of all things, which was not built with any amount of proper decorum and certainly didn't follow standard zoning laws or town ordinances, and you have a recipe for disaster. And paperwork. Throw that in with the news she learned this morning, and...

Ugh.

Mayor Mare doesn't want to complain, however. She's perfectly content with this job. More than that, actually. While she would have never dreamed of being a mayor when she was a teen, adulthood hit her hard and it hit her fast. She set her sights on this position and got to work obtaining a proper education, campaigning as best she could, and eventually getting the job she desired so much. To her surprise, it actually is more or less everything she ever wanted. She's happy with it, she's good at it, and Ponyville seems to like her leadership well enough (at least, when it isn't being undermined by the librarian-turned-princess). Boring paperwork aside, she has no qualms with her life as it is.

However, the more interesting aspects of her life have been occurring outside of work.

After she adjusted to her position as mayor, it was easy to become complacent with the life she had. After all, everypony always says to chase your dreams, but they never say what to do when you've actually reached those dreams. She had a nice job. She had a nice home. She lived in a happy community. She had plenty of money. What else was there for her to pursue?

In a way, she was almost afraid to chase that line of questioning. The last thing she needs is her ego getting the better of her and causing her to become a worse politician because of it. She needs to act with Ponyville's best interests in mind, no matter what! And if that meant settling into the groove she was in, then that's just fine. She does not want for anything, so she shouldn't be complaining!

...That said, a boyfriend wouldn't have hurt.

Mayor Mare smiles as she exits the town hall. The sunset has bathed the whole town in a beautiful warm glow. It's her favorite time of day, and the fact that it's so fleeting makes her appreciate it all the more. With her belongings tucked under one of her legs, she begins the short walk back home.

In order to make herself seem more "official" while campaigning for office, Mayor Mare dyed her usually pink mane a light gray color. She thought it made her look quite respectable and wise beyond her years. However, during those once-in-a-blue-moon occasions where she went out on a date, she found that the stallions in her life often believed she was older than she was. This led to some... awkward conversations, to say the least. She is a grown mare, of course, and a fair deal older than a certain princess and her friends, but she isn't THAT old!

Right?

She chuckles to herself as she reminisces on the terrible, terrible dates she went on. She isn't sure if it was the twentieth or thirtieth stallion that made her give up on love, but either way, she was done. She decided to just be happy with what she had and maybe adopt a cat or two. At least, that was the plan.

Then one day a bipedal alien stumbled into her office with a big dumb grin on his face and the trajectory of her life was changed forever.

...Wait, what?

The smile still on her tired face, Mayor Mare reaches her modestly sized home. It's two stories tall, and frankly, much bigger than she ever needed. If she were as young as she was when she took office, she'd buy a smaller house. She was a bit less humble in those days, but she supposes it all worked out. She yawns again as she slowly opens the unlocked front door and steps inside.

To her surprise, the house is mostly dark. That's strange, usually it's around this time that her husband cooks dinner. She sniffs at the air, and sure enough, there is the distinct smell of vegetable stew in the house. Did he just go to bed already or-

"AaaAAAHH!" Mayor Mare yelps as she is suddenly grabbed from behind and lifted into the air. She drops her belongings and her eyes go wide as she tries to make sense of what's going on, but before she can ever turn around, she feels the back of her neck being pelted with... kisses? "Anon!"

"Hey."

She hears her husband behind her chuckle as he continues to cover her with kisses, slowly working his way around her neck, up to her cheek, and eventually placing one long, loving kiss right on the lips. Her face goes beet red, but she doesn't struggle. When they part, she has to take a moment to catch her breath, both because of the kiss and because of the scare he just gave her.

"You always do this!"

"What, am I not allowed to give my favorite mare a little lovin'?"

"You don't have to give me a heart attack every time you try!"

Anon places Mayor Mare back down on the ground. She bends down to pick up the stuff she dropped, and when she comes back up, she finds Anon adjusting her glasses for her. Really now, she loves that man, but sometimes he drives her crazy.

This is Anon, a human displaced from his home. There was an incident involving some magic shenanigans over in the Everfree Forest, and the next thing anypony knew, a tall, fur-less thing was walking around town. Princess Twilight insisted that they treat him with kindness and respect, and sure enough, he did the same to them. Ordinarily, these strange happenings would never be Mayor Mare's problem. She may be the mayor, but she isn't some sort of superhero. She does politics, not... whatever Twilight and her friends do on a weekly basis.

That said, it was still her responsibility to make sure he got all the proper documentation after Princess Celestia declared that he be made a citizen. That includes identification, a new social security number... the works. Since citizens don't typically just appear as fully functional adults, the process took some time. Anon had to do a lot of waiting in her little office, but he isn't the type to sit back quietly. He wanted to chat with her, and let it be known that Mayor Mare is not a poor host. Although awkward at first, she slowly allowed herself to grow more comfortable around the human, who only seemed more and more interested in her as time went on. Then, the day finally came when they were done and he could move on with his life. By all accounts, they would likely only ever see each other in passing going forward, which was probably for the best. Heh, who would ever want to spend time with-

"Hey, would you like to join me for dinner?"

"H-huh?!"

Thus, she had a date. A date that, to her complete shock, actually went really well! Cut to a couple of years later, and here they are, happily married and living out their quiet lives in Ponyville. ...Even if Ponyville has only been getting louder in recent months.

And right now, she's hungry.

"Did you make dinner?"

"How'd you guess?"

"What do you want me to say, instinct? I can smell it, silly."

"Oh. Right."

They both chuckle as they start to settle in. Dinner is, as usual in their household, delicious. Anon is an excellent cook, and although he isn't a househusband by any means, he is a lot better at domestic stuff than she is. That's good for quite a few reasons, but right now, she's just happy to have this stew. She's really hungry, enough for seconds even.

"Wow, you're really scarfing it down tonight."

She looks up from her bowl with a slight blush on her face. A single bead of sweat forms on her forehead.

"I-I'm hungry."

"Haha, I never said there's anything wrong with that! Help yourself, I made plenty."

Ultimately, their dinner wraps up without a hitch. Mayor Mare lets out a satisfied sigh as Anon collects their dishes and washes them in the kitchen sink, leaving her to rest for a while at the table. When he finishes, he sits across from her.

"How're you feeling?"

"I'm exhausted, Anon. It's been... quite a day."

"Looks like it. Are you perhaps too exhausted to join me for an evening walk?"

"It's a bit late for that, don't you think?"

"Maybe, but it's been a while since we went on one. You've been spending all of your time either cooped up in here or cooped up at the town hall. It couldn't hurt to get outside for a bit."

She thinks for a moment. She's a bit leery about getting too much physical activity right now, but admittedly, some quiet time outside with her husband sounds nice. Besides...

"Sure, let's go."

With a smile on his face, Anon offers his hand to his wife. She rolls her eyes and places her hoof in said hand. She knows that it only serves to make it more difficult for him to walk, but he adores holding her hoof. The joy is evident on his face as they make their way outside and begin to leisurely pace around Ponyville's dirt roads. At this hour, it's pretty quiet outside. However, it isn't completely barren, and the snickers from three passing "Cutie Mark Crusaders" at the sight of the pair embarrasses Mayor Mare (though Anon doesn't seem to mind any). Eventually, she starts to make light conversation.

"How did your day go?"

"About as well as it could, I suppose. We finally finished the patchwork needed on Berry's house, so that should be the last of the damage Tirek caused." Anon works construction around Ponyville, and lately, he's had his hands full trying to help the town recover from Tirek's attack not long ago. Not that she's complaining, of course. He's a lot more... toned than he was when they met because of it. "I know I already asked you how you're feeling, but are you sure you're alright? You seem... distracted."

"Hm? O-oh! Yes, I am fine, thank you. Hmhm, typical for a mare my age, no?"

"Come on May, you're not that old and we both know it." She smiles at the word "May," it's a pet name he gave her not long after they started dating. "You sure you're fine?"

"...Why don't we sit down for a bit, Anon?"

She gestures to a nearby bench, which is conveniently illuminated by a street lamp hanging above it.

"Alright, I guess."

The two make themselves comfortable, though to her dismay, Mayor Mare finds herself being pulled into a cuddle by Anon.

"N-not in public!"

"Come on, nopony is out here anyway. Just relax."

"...Mmm." She makes a strange combination of a huff and a squeak as she allows herself to be pulled even tighter into Anon's embrace.

There, the two sit for a few quiet moments. Neither really need to say a word. The evening air is comfortable, their shared embrace is wonderfully warm and soft, and the love that they share cannot be denied, despite how unorthodox it may be.

"Anon?"

"Yeah?"

"How would you... well..."

"Yeeeees~?"

She sighs.

"How do you feel about our current life?"

Anon blinks. What kind of a question is that?

"Well, I suppose I'm quite comfortable with it. I'm happy, I have everything I need, and... well, so long as I have you by my side, I think any life would be satisfactory for me."

"Ugh, you're such a sap."

"Guilty as charged," he mumbles as he places a smooch on her forehead.

"Well, what if... what if our lives got a bit more... complicated?"

"Complicated how?"

"Like... louder? And with... more ponies in it?" She pulls away just enough to look up at Anon with an extremely anxious and forced smile on her face.

"More ponies? May, I don't know what you're talking..." Anon trails off as she gently grabs one of his hands with both of her front hooves and slowly guides it to her belly. It's at this point that Anon realizes she's looking just a bit more... plump than usual. "...May?"

"I went to the doctor this morning."

"You don't mean you're-"

"With twins."

"..." After staring at the anxious mare for an uncomfortably long time, Anon quickly pulls her back into his embrace, causing her to gasp. "May, that's incredible!"

"You're okay with this? W-with an old mare like me?"

"How could I not be?!" Anon pulls her into a kiss, which catches her off guard, but allows her anxiety to immediately melt away. She smiles as she presses back against him, and the two hold the kiss for quite some time. When they finally separate, both are grinning ear to ear. "May, you're the best thing to ever happen to me. And this?!" Anon motions down towards her belly, which would be completely unidentifiable as pregnant, much less with twins, unless examined by someone familiar with it. "This is the best news I've ever received. Well, right behind you agreeing to my marriage proposal I suppose."

"I thought you'd be more, I don't know, nervous? Angry? Confused?"

"There will be time for anxiety later! Right now I just want to hold you and squeeze you and never let you go!"

"P-please be gentle!"

Anon carefully avoids her now-sensitive stomach and nuzzles up against her face, causing her glasses to almost fall right off. She goes red in the face once again, but she doesn't lean away from the gesture.

Their joy is interrupted by the sound of a rustling bush behind them, causing both of them to turn around.

"Ah, dang it, Scoots!"

"Sweetie was the one who pushed me!"

"Come on, they were just gettin' to the good part!"

The eager, excitable faces of Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo stick out from a large shrub sitting a few feet behind the bush, only to be met with Anon kneeling down mere inches away from them.

"AAAAAH!" They all yell in unison before scampering away in surprise, causing Anon to laugh.

"I told you we were in public, dear," Mayor Mare says from behind him.

"You say that like I have any regrets."

She lets out a happy, tired sigh.

"Either way, shall we be heading home? I must admit, my hooves are quite tired after the day I've had."

"Oh? Let me help with that."

Mayor Mare's eyes go wide as Anon carefully picks her up bridal style.

"C-careful!"

Anon places a smooch on her cheek.

"Sorry, I just want to enjoy the feeling of being able to carry my family in my arms... all at once."

"...Heh. You're such a sap."

"I know, but I'm your sap."

She chuckles as the pair make their way back home. From the outside looking in, their lives must look extremely unorthodox. But to them?

To them, it's the most natural thing in the world.

Author's Note

You know, I said I was going to do this as a joke, but then I remembered how much I love mares. And Mayor Mare is a mayor of mares, which makes her the mare-est mare in Ponyville, so I should love her too. That makes sense, right? :pinkiecrazy:

As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!