Discord’s Bet with Pinkie Pie
Author's Note
This is apart of Ciderfest's Celebration of Writers this year and is being released alongside a few other stories written by me and edited by: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/27861/Nyronus
In order to give a preview of the convention stories to be presented a couple of weeks in advance.
Commence the Bet
Barley stared across the short distance to someone who was apparently playing with a stick. No not playing with it, he was organizing a set of sticks. Barley raised his eyebrow towards the pony and slowly approached. He also couldn’t help but notice the massive field of sticks put into small tiny tent like structures one would expect for campfires. “Umm…. hello?”
Mudbriar slowly and deliberately raised his lips and let out a shhh…. “You’ll disturb them.”
Barley looked around very confused by all this, “Who?”
Mudbriar pointed at one set of sticks, “The sticks, the twigs, and then kindling.” He said this affirmatively as he pointed at each slightly different set of sticks.
Barley stared at Mudbriar as if he were asking if he was serious. While contemplating all this and putting himself to thinking about it particularly hard; a flash of magic echoed between the two ponies.
They both looked up, Mudbriar with his usual expression of absolute contemptuous boredom and Barley in genuine shock. “Why hello there, my little pony chums! I’m here to make your day much more interesting.”
Mudbrair looked upon him with deadpan eyes, “My day is already extremely interesting, I have sticks to tend to here upon my stick farm.”
Barley stared at him rather stunned, “That seems like you are saying work is fun? When I can’t imagine how working on a stick farm would be fun, much less the purpose of a stick farm.” He then snapped his head back to Discord, “Wait! You’re Discord! Oh no, please no, I don’t need this today already with Fizzy and everything—”
He soon found his mouth missing as Discord snapped his fingers.
“I have a different proposal, I want to make your day interesting, whimsical and full of a bit of chaos. So with that in mind,” Discord snapped his fingers again for Barley’s mouth to reappear then another snap as the carefully laid sticks all suddenly sprang to life in a flash of magical chaos. They grew extra limbs made of trees and eyes appeared upon leaves that sprouted along with a mouth upon their central twigs. If it were not cartoonishly animated, it would have been horrific to gaze upon.
“I spent all day on that field segment, now I’m going to have to start over.” Mudbriar spoke with his usual monotone through with the slightest hint of irritation to his voice.
Discord laughed and smirked, “Oh you’re serious?” He then started laughing harder as the sticks joined in with his laughter. “You’ve got to loosen up some, seriously. And don’t worry! We’re just having a bit of fun, and I’ll set it all back, right as rain when we’re finished.” Discord gave a small grin. “Well, mostly, at least!””
“Barley my dear, come here, I feel something coming on.” Discord forcefully wrapped his arm around Barley and pulled him in tight. “Mudbriar you too!” Discord exclaimed as he wrapped Mudbriar in his tail and pull him up until he was pulled into the large group hug embrace.
“A hug?” Barley asked while wincing that he was this close to Discord’s rough skin.
“More than that little Barley” Discord smirked with a harder squeeze.
“The right to put me down and cease this hug.” Mudbriar replied without missing a beat. A beat was forming somewhere smooth slow dancing jazz started to play as if spawning from thin air.
“Oh but of course, can’t be hugging a pony who doesn’t want it.” Discord said as he dropped them both into a spin, holding onto their hooves as they both leaned back away from him to see him dressed in a three piece suit and both of them dressed in ball gowns.
Barley’s ball gown was made of sweet lace and a deep blue with glowing teal highlights. Meanwhile, Mudbriar’s ball gown was full of ruffles and lace, made of a deep dark mahogany red, with the ruffles made of spring green leaves. A flower adorned each of their heds.
“I feel a soooonnnngggg…” Discord started to tap dance, working himself to trade between his two semi-reluctant partners through his face, Barley was rather relieved he only needed to be in a dress and dance to the tune. Mudbriar’s face as usual was unreadable to the average pony but Discord swore he saw the hint of a smile.
“Listen here little ponies, it comes along a day you need a little chaos” The sticks that had become alive also now started using each other for musical instruments. Violins for some, trumpets for an entire section, several became drumsticks and used old logs for their beats. Within moments they had a full dance big band orchestra.
Discord flashed his teeth in a wicked smile, “What am I to do with a stick in the mud like you?” He turned to Barley, “A hint of Barley sounds like a great way to spice this morning dew.”
The trumpets rose for a moment of solo as the interesting three way flamenco dance twirled and swirled with the two stallions.
“As one would guess it’s rather hard especially when he makes things so blue.” Discord deflated then used his arms to put the two stallions dancing together in their dresses. “But it seems you two make quite the interesting brew.”
“A fun loving one who is just ready to go and do,” He snapped his attention from Barley and bulged his eyes out of his head as they touched on Mudbrair’s forehead. “Then we get something exciting. I should stick it to you like glue.”
Mudbriar and Barley found themselves with their hooves stuck together and their rear legs having found they could not stop dancing at that moment. “Listen here that hair, it’s just pee-ew!” With a snip of scissors and a flash of magic, Mudbriar found his bowl cut transformed into the shape of a Spanish galleon complete with sails of hair that caught the breeze. Which gave him a twirl back into Barley’s hooves to keep their dance going to Discord’s tappy tap of his tap shoes.
“Meanwhile you over there, distressed and distraught,” Discord leaned in and rubbed on Barley’s shoulders. “Worry not, I’m here to make you relax and enjoy your search for a clue.”
“Oh just what is an agent of chaos to do? You two seem to fit like a good shoe.” Discord waggled his tap shoes in the air, defying gravity entirely and also all forms of physics when they kept making their tap noises as if they were still striking the rocks on the ground.
“Surely there is something that we can go to with a view.” With a snap of his fingers the three were returned to normal, though the big band kept going behind them. They looked over a sunset, across beautiful mountains swirling with smokey clouds and even a hint of a rainbow through the sky. “Or maybe we should just get up and go to the zoo!”
The three of them in a flash were inside a chimera’s cage full of seven of the beasts, each one a different combination of three very predatory animals from a crocodile-hippopotamus-dingo combo to a lion-snake-shark combination. Barley as if he were a lion tamer leathers complete with a chair and a whip. Mudbrair in a rodeo clown outfit with oversized shoes, a big red nose, and hair that poofed out so large it partially blocked Barley’s sight. Discord was nowhere to be found until they realized he was one of the chimeras.
It’s three heads harmonized with him as two acted like backup singers for himself, “You know I can’t just let you sit there and stew. I gotta put some chaos in your life that you never knew.”
He suddenly vanished when Barley caught him with the whip only to appear again as Mudbriar’s nose, who looked at Discord completely unamused. “Even if it’s just for a second, you’re still in my queue.”
Mudbrair swatted at Discord only to find himself hitting his own nose and they were back in the dresses dancing as Barley put his hoof above his head and twirled him like a ballerina before dipping him low and down. “Oh my you two are quite the show through and through,” Discord sang as he slithered between them and split himself into two upper torsos and heads each one facing a different pony. “But you boys sure are so much fun too!”
Discord snapped his fingers and brought them up onto stage with him, holding each one by the hoof as the chaos trapping shred, even Mudbriar’s hair until they were both back to normal but standing on a stage headed up towards the clouds. “Sometimes it’s good to take a moment and spruce it up, afterall we all need a bit of a moment to shine up to your stage debut.”
“Come on boys sing it with me.” He spun them both around to face the sticks slowly dying down and returning to where they were before. “Oh just what am I to do with you too? Always so stuck up and worried sick, it’s a real conundrum for my kazoo!” He blew a kazoo that appeared in all their mouths. “But lessons in strange things like kung fu; perhaps just a lookie loo? Anyway I look at it when I’m with you, a little chaos will always,” Discord brought them in close and made his voice particularly low and deep, full of bass and reverb. “Just have to make, doooo….”
He slowly lowered his voice into the depths as the stage came back to the ground and disappeared. Mudbriar’s field returned entirely to how it was. “See there, no harm no foul, even adjusted a stick or two I would say.”
Mudbriar looked out and pointed his hoof at several, “Seven to be precisely accurate are adjusted from where I placed them.”
Discord looked at him starting to frown until for the briefest second, Mudbriar smiled then dropped the smile almost immediately back to his neutral face. “See there! Pinkie Pie owes me on out little bet!” There was a flash of a camera from somewhere and a polaroid photo appeared in Discord’s claw. “I’ve got picture evidence that he can indeed smile. Thank you for your assistance, Barley. The portal you want is six stick farms down and on the right through the field of angry berries just past the trees of pony eating apples.”
“Don’t you mean, tasty apples?”
Discord laughed and the sky itself darkened as did his face when he leaned down. “I meant what I said.” He spoke before vanishing leaving both ponies just as stunned as to what just happened.
(Song is original Work)