Midlife Crisis

by David Silver

1 - Buying Toys

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Hello.

My name is David Silver, I'm in my early 40s, and with that come many of the things that come with 40s, and some extras. Pain has become a constant friend of mine, destined to remain until the day I die.

But let's not dwell on that. That's a boring story. No, I was in my backyard. I was hoping to get a building constructed there, an ADU they call it. Renting it out would help a lot with boring money things.

But one can't ignore boring money things, not in the world that we humans made for ourselves. I had to handle the boring money things to keep on living, so I wanted that building.

My dog, Django, was eagerly sniffing at things and exploring, and I was keeping half an eye on him.

At least until he found something that didn't belong. It was a bright purple, and I recognized it immediately. Fearing he'd tear into it, or worse, I called him back. "Django, c'mere!"

I patted my side, calling the dog over with promises of gentle pets.

Once he was calm, and away, I strode purposefully to the purple splash. "What are you doing here?" A life-sized Twilight, crashed there in my backyard?

She looked clean and dry and unblemished for her journey, but surely that wouldn't last if I left her there.

Also, I never had a plush toy so large! I crouched with a wince. There was that pain, but it would not stop me from grabbing Twilight Sparkle.

Twilight let out a small squeak of surprise as I lifted her plush body from the grass.

"Careful!" she said, her voice muffled against my chest. I adjusted my grip so I could see her stuffed face.

"Sorry about that," I said, almost dropping her in surprise. "But what happened? Why are you here like...this?" I gestured at her fabric coat and yarn mane.

Twilight wiggled in my hands. "It's rather embarrassing actually. I was attempting a transdimensional teleportation spell to observe your world firsthoof. But something went wrong and I've become trapped in this plush form!"

I blinked down at the talking toy pony. "So...you're the real Twilight? The magical one from Equestria?"

She nodded, her head flopping. "The one and only! And no one seems able to see me either, only you." She sighed, blowing a bit of stuffing from her mouth. "I don't know how long I'm stuck like this or how to fix it."

I glanced around instinctively as if someone would be watching this unbelievable encounter. But the backyard was empty, and I saw no movement from any neighbors' yards.

"Well, we'll figure something out," I said, tucking Twilight under one arm. Her hooves dangled limply against my side. "I can't just leave you out here. Let's get you inside for now while we think of what to do."

As I carried the pony into my house, my mind reeled. What was I going to do with a magical talking plush pony? But I pushed the questions aside for the moment, focusing on making Twilight comfortable. This was certainly going to be interesting.

"Allow me to say." I go directly to my room, letting my dog in along the way.

I set Twilight on the bed and close the door to my room, barring Django. "I'm both excited and... Mostly excited, gonna just say... again."

"You know me?" With no other living creatures in sight, Twilight sat up despite being a plush toy. "Oh, I can move..." She tested each hoof one by one. "Why?" She looked around the room slowly. "Hm..."

It seemed to arrive at her and she brought her hooves together with a cloth thump. "I'm not being watched."

"I'm watching you." I reach to gently ruffle the top of Twilight. "Um, is it alright if I do that?" I shy the hand away. "That might have been rude."

"A little." Twilight reached up and captured my unsure hand between her hooves. "But only because I don't know you that well yet. I'm Twilight Sparkle, which you seem to already know?"

Twilight smiled up at me, her plush face almost seeming to move fluidly despite its stuffed nature. "You certainly know me, though I must admit at a bit of a disadvantage here about you."

I grinned excitedly back at her. "Oh wow, I can't believe I'm actually meeting you! I'm David - just an average human but a total fan of My Little Pony. Your show's meant a lot to me."

Twilight tilted her head. "My...show?"

"Oh right!" I said. "In this world, your adventures in Equestria and with your friends are a popular animated TV series called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. So you have tons of human fans here."

Twilight's eyes went wide. "Really? A whole television show about us?" She tapped a hoof to her chin. "Well I suppose if magic brought me here in plush form, the existence of a TV show isn't too unbelievable. Though it's strange to think anyone would want to watch little old me and my friends on adventures."

I chuckled. "Trust me, you all have big fanbases here. Though I guess celebrity status isn't too important right now - figuring out how to get you back home in one piece is." I hesitated before gently patting her mane again. "Don't worry Twilight, we'll get this sorted. I'm just thrilled to actually meet the real pony behind the character!"

Twilight smiled, leaning into my touch. "Well, I certainly lucked out finding the one human who already knows me. With your help I'm confident we can solve this interdimensional plush problem!" She held out a hoof for me to shake. "It's nice to meet you too, David. Let's get to work!"

I joyfully shook her tiny hoof, eagerness rising in me. Maybe having a talking pony fall into my life wasn't so bad after all! Except the thousand things that could go wrong... "One thing."

"Yes?" She sits back, watching me evenly.

"I'm not young."

Twilight inclined her head. "I didn't think you were a foal." She paused and blinked. "Oh, um... child? You're clearly not a child human. I've seen those."

I chuckled at the misunderstanding. "Not one of those, but also not a young adult. You're one of those, right?"

"Yep." She put a hoof on her plush chest. "I am a young adult pony mare unicorn, if we're getting all of that out of the way. You are a...?"

"Middle-aged human male." I counted on fingers with each word. "Can I ask a dumb question?"

"You don't strike me as the sort to ask those, but we've only just met." She inclined her head slowly. "Go ahead."

"What sort of magic can you do? Can you do magic on me?"

Twilight seemed to hear something in that. "Is... something wrong?" She looked me over with new attention. "Are you hurt? I heard you make a sound before."

I winced, remembering it. I hated showing pain as a habit, but that was life... "Yeah. We can start with age, but I have a few other things clogging things up."

Her plush horn glowed and sputtered out. "Mmm... No. I can't do much like this. Figuring out how is half the reason I haven't already gone home."

Twilight frowned, tapping her chin with a hoof as she studied me. "Hmm, it seems being trapped in this plush form has severely limited my magical abilities. I can barely produce a spark!"

She shook herself in frustration, wrinkling the soft fabric of her body. "Oh, this is going to make solving this problem so much harder. I was hoping to analyze the teleportation spell remnants or residues to figure out what went wrong. But that requires magic!"

I gave her a sympathetic pat, feeling the smooth faux fur under my palm. "That's rough. But don't worry, we'll figure something out even without magic to start. Two heads - or a head and horn I guess - are better than one!"

Twilight sighed but then set her mouth in a determined line. "You're right. I may not have magic but I still have my mind and knowledge. Between the two of us, we're bound to find an answer."

She turned and clambered awkwardly onto my leg so she could look me straight on. I sank into my computer chair, forming a seat for her in the process. "Now then, tell me more about these issues of yours. Perhaps they relate somehow to why only you can see me or provide other clues. Don't leave anything out!"

I chuckled at her sudden intensity. Even without spells, her thirst for information and solving mysteries was clearly unabated. And her close attention made warmth spread through me despite the oddity of the situation.

"Well, it's kind of a long story regarding health stuff," I said. "Might take a while to get through it all. But for my favorite pony?" I gently booped her plush nose. "I've got all the time in the world."

Twilight sparkled, grinning up at me as she pulled out a miniature notebook and quill from...somewhere. "Excellent! Now start from the beginning while I take plentiful notes..."

"So, I have Mulitple Sclerosis. Do ponies know what that is? I'm just as happy if they don't."

Her flat expression was answer enough. "It means my body, my immune system, is attacking me. Specifically the nerves in my brain and spine, which is bad, since I need those."

Twilight winced, plush nose wrinkling. "I should imagine so... Did you anger a wizard into cursing you with this malady?"

"That would be easier on some levels." I imagined such an irate spellcaster. They could be reasoned with, in theory, and asked nicely to undo the hex. "It's a disease, with no cure. I take drugs to slow it down, but that's the best we have."

"Mmm..." She stroked at her chin thoughfully. "That is an unkind disease, to put it mildly. I am happy to report that no such thing exists in Equestria."

"Good."

Twilight shook her head slowly. "You look happier that we don't have it than you seem upset that I don't know how to fix it right away."

I cupped her round cheeks. "I woke up this morning not expecting to be cured. That hasn't changed."

Twilight leaned into my touch, her eyes full of sympathy and determination. "Well, uncurable or not, you've still helped me when I mysteriously arrived here as a plush stranger. So now allow me to return the favor!"

She dramatically swished her tail as if casting a spell, though sadly no magic came. "I, Twilight Sparkle, pledge myself to doing everything I can to research the ins and outs of this MS disease. Perhaps I can uncover something that helps make it more manageable!"

I smiled at her earnest proclamation. "Twilight you really don't have to - "

She raised a hoof, cutting me off. "Tut tut! I absolutely do have to. Because that's what friends do - we look out for each other!" She playfully booped my nose back. "You have been more than kind already David so please, allow me to shoulder some of your troubles too. After all..." She glanced down at her plush body, shrugging with a sheepish grin.

"...it seems I'll be relying on your help for a while yet. So let me contribute too! I may not have magic but I can certainly put this brilliant mind of mine to the task of learning everything there is to know about Multiple Sclerosis and exploring ways to improve life with it."

I could feel a blush spreading over my face as I rubbed the back of my neck. "That's...really thoughtful of you, Twilight. If anyone can pull new insights from books and research, it's definitely you." I put my hand gently on her back. "Let's start with an idea I had. Maybe the literal brain damage is why I see you?"

Twilight blinked slowly at that. "Brain... oh! Yes, you did mention your body... is attacking itself. Up here?" She pointed at her head.

"Yep." I pet Twilight idly. Having a Twilight to pet was even better than a dog. Yes, I was quite happy to keep on petting her if she was alright being pet, which she seemed to be. "I've already had extensive damage up there and along my spine, so my brain isn't where it started. So I'm talking to a plush doll now. I've heard of more horrible fates."

Twilight skewed an ear back. "I'm not sure if you're joking, and that's the worst part... I know I'm real, but are you really comfortable not being as sure? Would you really talk with a toy?"

"If it talked back," I reasoned. "Why not?"

Twilight considered my words, idly leaning into my pets. "Hmm, I suppose that's a fair perspective. And I imagine having a disease attacking one's brain could make questioning reality more understandable."

She tilted her head. "Though for what it's worth, I can assure you I am indeed real and not a manifestation of illness or injury." She gestured down at herself. "Well, real in the sense of who I am, if not my current plush appearance."

I chuckled. "Don't worry, I believe you Twilight. Like I said, talking to a pretty pony isn't the worst hallucination I could have."

At that, her cheeks seemed to flush deeper purple under the faux fur. "Oh, um, pretty? That's kind of you to say." She ducked her head, scuffing a hoof self-consciously.

My own face heated again. "Well, yeah. I always thought you were the cutest on the show too." I coughed. "Anyways..."

Twilight shyly tucked a strand of yarn mane behind her ear. "Ahem, yes, anyway... While brain differences could explain why you see me, we should test that hypothesis further. Learning more about your illness may provide more clues too."

She tapped her hooves together eagerly. "Ooh this is so fascinating! Interdimensional magical malfunctions meets unknown neurological disorders. We have so many avenues to investigate!"

I smiled wryly at her enthusiasm. "Take it easy there. Let's start slow with seeing what resources we can find first." I patted her back. "But it'll be nice having help looking into all this."

Twilight smiled back brightly. "Absolutely! This is why research is always better with a trusted friend by your side."

"Now..." I twirled the seat towards my computer and reached around her, moving the mouse and clacking the keys. "There are a thousand websites about this, filled with dense technical information. No cures, but a lot of medical analysis. Is that... helpful?"

Twilight's eyes shined as information came up on the screen. "You're good at that. For having brain damage, you're better at that than I ever was." She made pawing motions at the keyboard. "You should have seen the last time I tried to use one of these... Not my best day..."

"I wasn't made stupid. I... Ugh, it's frustrating." I slow to a stop in the research. "Like I'll think of a word, and know the word, but can't remember how to say or spell the word I have the concept of in my head. I'll sit there feeling stupid for a minute or two until the connections come together again."

Twilight reached out a hoof and gently rested it on my arm. "That does sound deeply frustrating. I can't imagine what it must be like to have your mind rebel against you so."

Her eyes were soft and understanding. "But for what it's worth, I certainly don't think you seem stupid at all. On the contrary, you've been remarkably thoughtful, articulate, and yes - skilled with that computer contraption."

She nodded firmly. "So please don't ever feel stupid on my account. Everypony...er, everybody has strengths and weaknesses. Why if it makes you feel better, I'm still getting the hang of this toy body myself!"

She held up her hooves and flexed the soft plush hooves. "Not very dextrous I'm afraid. But together we balance each other out!" Her voice took on a soothing tone.

"Also, please remember frustration and difficulty concentrating can also be symptoms of the disease itself. So don't judge yourself harshly over what you cannot control."

I sighed but gave her a small smile. "That's good advice Twilight. Having an outside supportive perspective really does help. Thank you." There was also the fact that I had a Twilight Sparkle to talk to, and pet. That was a plus.

She beamed. "Think nothing of it! That's what friends are for after all." She leaned in to examine the screen. "Now then, shall we dive into researching this tricky condition? Between unicorn brains and human fingers, I know we'll make progress."

I couldn't help an eager grin back. "One thing." I hiked a thumb at myself. "I love that you're thinking about me. I appreciate it... But I'd rather get you home."

Twilight's eager expression faltered. "Oh...of course, you're right. As curious as I am to learn more about your illness, the priority should be figuring out what happened to trap me in this form and get me back to Equestria."

She sighed, glancing down at her plush body. "As helpful as you've been David, I'm sure my friends are worried about where I am. And there are my royal duties to consider as well."

Looking back up at me, she set her mouth in a determined line. "So you're correct - solving the mystery of my magical mishap comes first. Once I'm restored, I can better assist with research from my end."

I nodded, minimizing the medical websites to pull up some physics and magic reference sites instead. "Don't worry Twilight, I understand. Friendship is magic after all - so we need to get you back to give your pony friends some hugs. Maybe we can find some clues about interdimensional teleportation tricks."

Twilight smiled, placing her hoof over my hand on the mouse. "Thank you for understanding...and for being such a good friend yourself." Her eyes softened. "Hopefully I can repay the favor someday. For now though..." she rubbed her hooves together, "let's study some science and magic!"

I really wasn't sure what I could find that would help a unicorn with their magic... But I was determined to give it my all, helping her navigate from page to page and helping her search around. Hours slid by without either of us noticing or caring much.

It was the start of a lovely relationship, if one asked me about it.


Author's Note

It's a story about me, literally. Me and Twilight, trying to figure things out. But what lies at the end of this path?

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