Ready to Rumble - a Ciderfest App Story

by Snowday_Pegasus

Rating: teen
Tags: Iron Will, Bulk Biceps, Violence, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Prince Rutherford, Tirek, Angel, Adventure
Length: 2386

Iron Will has found a page from the Book of All Stories, and he used it to start a professional wrestling league

On top of the Marewaukee Convention Center is the Minotaurnado Airship, home of the Creature Wrestling Federation arena. Stampede Smash and the Legion of Darkness are about to square off in a tag team match, and it's up to you to decide the outcome.

Published 2023-11-26 01:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2023-11-26 01:00:00 UTC

Beginning: Step into the Squared Circle

“Ponyville Ciderfest 2023, everycreature of the multiverse! Steaming Live from the CWF MinotaurNado Airship, currently moored to the Hilton Marewaukee City Center! We’re here to bring you edge-of-your-seat commentary on Tonight’s ‘Creature Wrestling Federation’ Pay-Per-View event, ‘Crossworld-Carnage!’ I’m Iron Will, President of the CWF!”

“And I am Gladmane, famous Las Pegasus tycoo–

“Former tycoon. Didn’t you lose your Casino?”

“And it still breaks my heart, but I thought you lost your Airship to the bank after that “Princess Cruise” fiasco. Where did you find the funding for all of this?”

“Magical page; made a wish, of course!”

“I reckon that’s as fair of a way to become successful as anything.”

Grubber’s voice booms. “Approaching the ring, in the blue corner, weighing in at a combined total of 1265 pounds, one is an expert smasher, the other flies slow and screams loud, Prince Rutherford and Bulk Biceps are… Stampede Smash!”

Gladmane grins. “Iron Will, I wagered on their opponents. But I’ll admit these two look mighty formidable, uh-huh-uh-huh!”

“Best of luck to you, I’m betting on Stampede Smash! These two icons are absolute powerhouses!”

Grubber says, “And in the red corner, with a combined weight of 700 pounds– 97 percent of which goes to the centaur, the Legion of Darkness, Lord Tirek and Fluffy… Fury!”

Iron WIll says, “Angel Bunny making his debut as Tirek’s tag-team partner. I’m amazed this hare made the cut, but Tirek’s manager, Cozy Glow, must have seen something she liked.”

“How right you are, and Cozy Glow’s game is deception. I think this bunny is going to surprise us.”

Ding! Ding Ding!

Iron Will shouts, “Tirek and Rutherford squaring off first. Rutherford charges at Tirek, Tirek sidesteps, Rutherford off the opposite rope, headbutt! Tirek is staggering. Rutherford off the ropes again, another headbutt. Again. Ohhh, Tirek bucks Rutherford. Tirek on the offensive now with a chop, and another, and another! Rutherford goes low and hooks his horns under Tirek’s arms. Is it? The Yakkaplex! Rutherford flips Tirek onto his back!”

“Even for a Yak, tossing 694 pounds like that is mighty impressive.”

“Tirek’s slow getting up. Rutherford tags in Bulk Biceps. Biceps wasting no time, climbing the turnbuckle!”

Biceps reaches the top of the ring corner, raises his arms screaming, “Yeeeeeeeeeeeah!!!”

Iron Will yells, “It’s the Pegasus Plunge!”

“Tirek is down again! Oh, I’m not liking the looks of this.”

“Neither are Cozy Glow and Fluffy Fury; they’re in a panic! Biceps tagging in Rutherford, Rutherford climbing the ropes now for the Himalayan Splash. The crowd chanting ‘Yak Smash Yak Smash!’ This could be it for Tirek; Fluffy may not even get to wrestle.”

“There goes my 500 Bits– wait, what’s happening? Cozy Glow hurt her wing somehow. She’s in tears! Poor thing. The referee coming over to make sure she’s OK–”

“Ref, that’s not your job!”

“She’s just too adorable. Look at her. How could you resist helping that poor, defenseless, filly?”

“Look! Fluffy Fury running across the rope like a gymnast, he just hit Rutherford with a carrot! Rutherford falls off the turnbuckle to the floor on the outside. Ref still checking on Cozy Glow, turn around!”

“The crowd is on their feet now, and I’m gonna win big.”

“They’ve still gotta get through Bulk Biceps though.”

[CHOICE]

Who are you rooting for?

Stampede Smash. (Chaos)
Legion of Darkness. (Villain)

Stampede Smash (Chaos)

Iron Will puts down his headset for a moment and mutters something to a nearby official.

Gladmane glances over. “What did you just say, something about a ‘butterfly?’”

“Looks like Cozy Glow feels better, the ref is finally watching the match again. Tirek taking a breather from that pummeling he received, and now it’s Fluffy against Snowfl– I mean Bulk Biceps! Biceps tries to get Fluffy with a hoof stomp. Again, and again! Fluffy is too fast. Biceps bends over and grabs Fluffy, whoa! Fluffy Fury just flipped Biceps over by the arm. Biceps has no idea what happened!”

“I don’t think anycreature has any idea what happened.”

“Biceps better not risk another frontal assault. That rabbit's dynamite. What? It looks like Biceps is out and Fluffy is just hopping up and down, pummeling him!”

An unexpected cheer comes from the crowd.

“Who is– is that Fluttershy?”

“Fluttershy marching down to ringside and she looks very upset. She’s climbing the stairs. Fluffy Fury looks nervous.”

Fluttershy yells, “Angel! What are you doing with these ruffians? This is way too dangerous for you!”

“Does she even see the giant Pegasus that he took down?” Gladmane asked.

“Fluttershy has nudged Fluffy Fury out of the ring, and the crowd is not happy.”

“Neither is Lord Tirek. He’s coming over. Uh oh!”

“What?! Tirek grabbed Fluttershy by the throat, Celestia! No! He– he just choke-slammed her! Fluttershy is down!”

“I’ve got nothing against underhanded tricks but that was low! Listen to the boos from the crowd!”

“She’s not mov– no, she’s shaking. The ref is down there, checking a real injury this time. Angel is there too, he doesn’t know what to– wait, he’s back in the ring, he’s attacking Tirek! Rutherford’s in! Biceps! All three of them pummeling him! Tirek’s trying to fight them off.”

“Cozy Glow dragging a folding chair towards Fluttershy. No, Cozy Glow, don’t! The referee sees her with the chair, he calls for the bell! Disqualification! This match is over!"

Ding! Ding! Ding!

“Stampede Smash wins, and– there goes my Bits.”

“They’re still fighting in the ring! Look at this! Tirek off the rope, clothesline! Biceps is down! He headbutts Rutherford– they’ve literally locked horns! Rabbit punch from Fluffy!”

“The crowd just exploded, what do they see?” Gladmane asks. “Look! Discord’s coming towards the ring!”

“Uh oooooooooh!”

“My oh my, does he have fire in his eyes!”

“You’re right, Gladmane. He really does have fire in his eyes! Look at those flames! Discord, still recovering from his fight against Bill Cypher back in September, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this angry!”

“The whole crowd is on its feet and who can blame them? Discord kneels and places a paw on Fluttershy. She’s awake, they’re talking. EMT’s are coming to check on her, encouraging Discord to let them do their job. Discord stands up, he’s staring down Tirek!”

“The referee, Biceps, Rutherford, and Angel are clearing the ring, they don’t want to be anywhere near this! No love lost between these two.”

“You are so right, Iron. Tirek betrayed Discord before; now he’s opened Pandora’s Box. I would not want to be Tirek right now. Discord climbing the steps. I say, this… has been a long time coming. Friends, only here tonight at Crossworld-Carnage, can you experience this!”

“Discord raises his claw, here comes the finger snap. Nope, he’s not doing it. He points! He’s going to fight Tirek without magic?!”

“He might still be weak, Iron. Saving his power.”

“Tirek walking right up to Discord, getting in his face. Tirek shoves Discord back and bucks him in the chest. DIscord takes it and he’s right back in Tirek’s face. Ohhhh sweet Celestia! Look at those eyes!”

“Discord punches Tirek. Tirek punches back. Blow for blow, wailing on each other!”

“Look, here comes Sombra! Sombra in the ring now! Sombra and Tirek ganging up on Discord! Double-flying kick! Discord goes down!”

“Now what? Applejack coming at full gallop, over the ropes, ohhhhhhh! She just bucked Sombra clear out of the ring!” Applejack and Discord against Tirek. Look, Gladmane!”

“Grogar! The real Grogar!”

“Oh, no!”

“Grogar gets to the ring and oooooh! His head is slammed into the steel steps by Skorpan!”

“Angel Bunny, Biceps and Rutherford are back in. Everyone is in! This is total chaos!”

“Discord throws Tirek into the turnbuckle! Bam! Tirek staggers forward, he’s down on his face! Discord climbing the ropes. He leaps into the air, tucking his legs and arms in!”

“Cannonball!” Discord screams and then turns into a giant cannonball!

“Tirek rolls away, the cannonball broke through the apron!”

“Where’d he go, and did the ship just shake?”

An alarm goes off and the ship starts tilting!

“We’re falling out of position!” Iron Will yells. “Cut the moorings!”

The Marewaukee skyline whizzes by as the ship dives towards the streets, but the action in the ring continues. Half the crowd is in a panic, the other keeps watching the show. Officials scramble to break up the fight. The ship bounces off the ground, sending many diving out of the way. It tears up the street and eventually comes to a stop. Discord materializes nearby, holding Fluttershy. He looks at the ship. “Oops.”

Fluttershy says, “We should make sure everycreature is alright.”

Discord limps towards the ship, still carrying Fluttershy.

Legion of Darkness (Villain)

“Looks like Cozy Glow feels better; the ref is finally watching the match again. Tirek taking a breather from that pummeling he received, and now it’s Fluffy against Snowfl– I mean Bulk Biceps! Biceps tries to get Fluffy with a hoof stomp. Again, and again! Fluffy is too fast. Biceps bends over and grabs Fluffy, whoa! Fluffy Fury just flipped Biceps over by the arm. Biceps has no idea what happened!”

“I don’t think anycreature has any idea what happened.”

“Biceps better not risk another frontal assault. That rabbit's dynamite. It looks like Biceps is out and Fluffy is just hopping up and down, pummeling him!”

“Look at Cozy Glow laughing, rubbing her hooves together. The Chessmaster had a strategy and you can tell by the look in her eyes that it worked perfectly.”

“Rutherford is back on his feet on the outside, hoping Biceps can tag him in. Biceps crawling over, he reaches out– another flip by Fluffy Fury lands him back in the center of the ring! Fluffy hops on his chest for a pin. One! Two! Biceps slaps Fluffy Fury away with his hoof.”

“The end-game may be one weakness Fluffy Fury will have to figure out how to contend with. No matter how strong he is, he still only weighs a few pounds.”

“Fluffy tagging in Tirek. Tirek struts over and stomps Biceps in the head. Over and over again! Tirek tags in Fluffy. Fluffy leaps effortlessly to the top rope. Tirek looks ready to catch Fluffy Fury who takes a leap– Tirek catches him with his magic! Look at this! Fluffy levitating above Tirek with that evil orange magic swirling around him!”

“I knew about this one, they’ve been practicing it all week, Iron Will. Uh-huh-uh-huh! It’s called the Hare-Raiser!”

“Fluffy glowing like a fireball with that Centuar magic, Tirek sends him splashing into Bulk Biceps! Wwwwwwwow! Did you see that explosion of energy?!”

“I sure did, and it was bee-autiful. Uh-huh-uh-huh!”

“Biceps is still somehow moving! Rutherford pounding his hooves on the mat as Biceps crawls towards him. Fluffy Fury pulling him back, like a cat toying with a mouse.”

“Bulk Biceps is in a world of trouble. Fluffy Fury and Tirek playing it smart under the guidance of the Chessmaster, keeping him at the center of the ring, cutting him off from Prince Rutherford. I called it, Iron Will. I called it.”

“I’m afraid you did, Gladmane.”

“”Uh-huh-uh-huh! Tirek puts a hoof on Biceps’s chest– he’s flexing his muscles to the crowd! One! Two! Kickout!”

“Tirek loves to showboat but that’s the first time I’ve seen him flex during a pin– showing off his biceps while standing on Biceps.”

“Tirek is trying it again!”

“One! Two! Biceps trips Tirek by the legs, rolls him up, One! Two! Tirek kicks out!”

“That was a close one, Iron Will. Tirek’s getting cocky, and Cozy Glow is mad!”

“Tirek straying too far from her playbook almost cost him the match, Gladmane, and she is giving him an earful from ringside.”

“Tirek losing his patience, he tags in Fluffy, Fluffy hops to the top rope, they’re going for the Hare-Raiser again. Tirek catches Fluffy with his magic– wait, Tirek is climbing the ropes now, still levitating Fluffy Fury!”

“I have never seen something like this before, Gladmane– Tirek balancing himself on the corner, levitating Fluffy Fury above him, charging him with that dark magic. Fluffy nearly ten meters in the air– this is going to finish off Biceps– what’s Rutherford doing?”

“Seems to be walking away from the ring, Iron.”

“Did he quit? No, he’s turning! Coming straight at the ring, he’s gonna ram it! POW!!! Tirek and Fluffy fell off the ropes onto the mat! Rutherford just knocked the ring a full meter with that big Yak head of his!”

“He saved Biceps but he’s paying for it; he is stunned!”

“I’m not surprised, Gladmane. That was a dangerous move by Rutherford. Tirek and Fluffy trying to recover, Biceps crawling to the corner, Tirek tries to grab him, tag in! Rutherford is in the ring, charging, headbutts Tirek into the turnbuckle! Fluffy Fury hops up on Rutherford, trying to hurt him, that bunny is running all over his back throwing random punches. Rutherford just flips over, slamming his back into the mat with Fluffy under him!”

“Oh, that hurt him. Tirek tagged out; he can’t help. Fluffy Fury has not moved. The referee is counting to ten for the knockout. Aww, it looks like Cozy Glow has sustained another broken wing.”

“Yeah, the referee isn’t falling for it this time.”

“What? Not believe Cozy Glow? What kind of monster are you?”

“Minotaur.”

“I was being rhetorical– Tirek arguing with the referee! What’s that about?”

“Probably angry that the referee isn’t giving Darla Dimple his complete attention.”

“Cozyglow’s wing is miraculously, fixed, Iron Will!”

“Yeah, so miraculous she’s flying with a chair and she slams it on the head of Prince Rutherford! He’s dazed!”

“I don’t think that would normally be enough to do that to him, but after hitting the ring like he did–”

“Another hit! Rutherford goes down! Cozy Glow trying to get Tirek’s attention, Tirek sees it, he goes for the pin! 1, 2, 3!”

Ding! Ding! Ding!

Grubber speaks, “The Winners of this match, the Legion… of… Darkness!”

“Well it’s over, Iron Will, and you have to give credit to Cozy Glow for her masterful strategizing.”

“I’m giving credit to her ‘broken’ wings.”

“Doesn’t matter, Iron. If the referee didn’t see it, it didn’t happen. Uh-huh-uh-huh!”