Crisis of Infinite Trixies

“Ugh.” Laughter groaned, shaking her head to free the cobwebs. She blinked in confusion, unsure where she was. It was pitch black, and she shivered as she rose from the cold stone floor. Thick iron bars blocked her escape, not even rattling as she shook them. She was a caged animal.

“A cage?” she blinked in surprise. Then their attack on Alchemax Labs returned in a rush. That Kraven the Hunter had dosed her with something. That must mean she was the prisoner of the alternate version of her friend, Honey Do.

Beyond her prison, she saw nothing but a cold, damp basement. Rats scurried in the distance, and Laughter repressed a shudder of revulsion.

“Hey!” Laughter shook the cage harder, but its iron bars refused to budge. It didn’t stop her from screaming at the top of her lungs, though.

“Ah, I see my guest has awoken.” A familiar voice said, slinking into view from the shadows like the mighty cat of which she wore.

“Why is Trixie here?” Laughter said, glaring at her captor. She paused as she got a better view of the alternate version of her friend. “And why are you covered in spiders?”

Hundreds of arachnids crawled across the hunter’s body, many Laughter recognized as deadly enough to kill with a single bite. She shuttered, scooting away from the creatures.

“It’s nothing personal. You are here because I need bait to draw in the Spider. Fear not. I will release you once our battle has concluded.”

“Great.” Laughter grimaced as a spider crawled across Kraven’s eye, but the mighty hunter remained impassive.

“As for why I cover myself with spiders? Simple. To beat your prey, you must understand its every aspect. For years, the Spider has evaded and beaten me, vexed me at every corner. It made me realize I hadn’t done my due diligence as a hunter!”

“Okay, but does it need to involve literally covering yourself in spiders?!”

“It is necessary. The spider gives Spider-mare her power. Understand that source, and she’ll be powerless against me. But studying the spider isn’t enough, I must partake of its flesh! Understand the very nature of its being!” Without preamble, Kraven suddenly ripped the spiders from her body and pulled them into her mouth.

Laughter watched in fascinated revulsion as Kraven chewed the arachnids, their little tiny legs poking out of her mouth.

“Fear not for your safety, Trixie. You should be free soon. My clash with The Spider will happen soon enough. No doubt she’s already heading for my lair.” Kraven said, as if she hadn’t just chowed down on spiders.

But any snippy response caught in Laughter’s throat, too horrified to speak. I’m in the lair of a mad mare. Please, somepony, anypony, come and save me!

—

“Tsk.” Shade ground her hoof against the carpeted floor, furious with herself. Razzle sympathized with the mare, knowing how much their leader's failure was tearing herself apart inside. They’d rescued one, only to lose another of their number.

“Okay, Spider-mare.” The name sounded odd on Shade tongue, like she disapproved of it. Still, Shade won’t reject the masked unicorn help if it meant rescuing their friend. “Who is this Kraven the Hunter? What do you know about her?”

“Bits and pieces,” Spider-mare replied. For some bizarre reason, the superhero hung from the ceiling instead of speaking to them the right way up like a normal pony. “She emigrated from Loshad sixty years ago after the Soviets took over her country. Rich nobility doesn’t really jibe with communism. Using her vast fortune, she earned a reputation as a fierce hunter, bagging many furry, friendly animals as trophies. But that didn’t satisfy her, so she came after me, your friendly neighborhood Spider-mare.”

“Wait, sixty years?!” Shade stared, dumbstruck. “But Daring Do didn’t even look past thirty!”

“Beats me,” Spider-mare admitted. “Some Zebra voodoo magic or something. She’s definitely not a normal pegasus. She’s given me quite some tough tussles over my career. Never somepony you should underestimate.”

“I see.” Shade scowled, not liking the sound of this. “Where would she keep Laughter captive?”

“Kraven owns a castle on the outskirts of Manehatten. That’s my best bet.” Spider-mare replied.

“A castle?” Iron Will said, steam snorting from his nostrils. “People in this universe sure love their dramatics.” He gestured out a window. “And it looks ready for a storm, too. A perfect setup for an epic showdown.”

“And how do you own a castle in Manehatten?” Razzle thought, mystified. The type of money involved would be insane!

“Yeah, that is fortuitous,” Spider-mare said, wincing.

“Will there be other nasty surprises?” Shade asked. “No doubt Bayou Runner has hired other nasty supervillains to ambush you, Spider-mare.”

“No, Kraven wants to fight me alone. Which I’m going to do.” Spider-mare said, her voice brooking no argument.

“But!” Shade’s jaw tightened in stubbornness. “Laughter is my responsibility. I got her into this mess."

“I suppose it is their showdown.” Though, Razzle wasn’t happy about leaving Spider-mare to fight the supervillain alone, either. The other Trixie offered their own protests, wanting to join the fight, regardless of the danger.

“I’m not so sure.” Northern Lights said. “We might only get in their way. It’d be better to act as backup.”

“No, I say we join forces and claw that bastard’s throat out!” Kassa said, flexing her claws.

“Woah! Woah!” Spider-mare said. “Nopony killing anyone!”

“I don’t care. That mare’s a murderer and a sicko” The lioness didn’t seem ready to back down. “She’s getting hers.”

This surprised Razzle. She’d never seen the usually lazy, laid-back lioness this angry before. Kassa paced the room like a trapped animal, her teeth bared. Everypony kept their distance from their irate teammate, even the unflappable Jade.

“Kraven’s tasteless jacket must really offend Kassa’s sense of honor.” Shade said, after a moment of pondering. She’d clearly never seen his side of her teammate, either.

“Yeah, that’s why I need to go alone,” Spider-mare said, keeping a wary eye on Kassa from under her mask.

“Fine, you’re all useless, anyway!” Before anypony could stop her, Kassa had already torn open the window and leaped through it. Everypony rushed over to see if her teammate was okay. Their hotel room stood on the fourth floor. But Razzle sighed in relief when she caught a shaggy form already darting past a corner, scaring pedestrians as she passed them.

“She’s not usually like this.” Shade gave a weak smile.

Spider-mare put a hoof on her forehead before bounding through the open window. “I’ve got this handled. Don’t follow!” With a quick web on a distant building, the superhero was already slinging through the Manehatten skyline with astonishing speed. That’d all happened in a single eye blink.

“Darn it!” Shade vented her frustration, knowing she was helpless against that ancient and dangerous hunter. Razzle shared her feelings of uselessness. Unlike the other Trixies, she didn’t have battle skills or powerful magic. She was only an actress. Razzle sagged, depressed. Why was she even here?

“We’re not staying put, are we?” Iron Will said, crossing his muscular arms. “I just got free. I’m eager to bust some heads.”

“Yeah, boss, what’s the plan?” Northern Lights said. Everypony turned to her for guidance, waiting patiently for her opinion.

Shade rubbed her temple. “Rushing after Spider-mare didn’t work so hot last time. But we can’t stay put, either. Not with Bayou Runner after us.” On top of all that, the insane and monstrous Venom, was still out there as well.

Their leader came to a decision. “We’re on the backswing. It can’t stay like this. We can’t always depend on Spider-mare for help.”

“The boss has a plan.” Northern Lights brightened. Everypony in the room perked up their ears in interest as Shade spoke.

“The Kingpin’s too tough to take down easily. We’ll worry about him later.” Shade sounded discouraged, but still not ready to abandon her vengeance against the earth pony mobster. But Razzle wasn't so eager, fearing Bayou Runner's wealth, power, and influence too great to overcome. “Instead, we need to track down and defeat Venom.”

“But that’s crazy!” Razzle said, alarmed. “We can’t stop her!

“She’s dangerous, but not unbeatable. We have to save her from that thing hijacking her body. And I have a plan.” Shade said.

The stubborn tightness to Shade’s jaw told Razzle any arguing would be fruitless. Their leader was determined to continue on this path, despite its dangers. So Razzle surrendered, not bothering to argue.

And who knows, this might actually work. Once from her alien parasite, this Trixie might actually be nice and reasonable. Razzle hoped this, at least.

“May I get some help here?” Bayou Runner said as he fiddled with his tie. He frowned, having some difficulty pulling it off. Ties were difficult for earth pony hooves. Thankfully, his wife came to his rescue. A pink aura pulled at the right piece of fabric, and the red tie slipped off. While a key part of his professional image, he despised them, hating how they constricted this throat.

“Thanks.” He discarded the piece of fabric on his bed. “Do you think I should switch to a bow tie instead?” They weren’t in fashion, but if anyone could change that, it was Manehatten’s business and society king, Bayou Runner. Everypony followed his hooves.

His lovely Fleur gave the matter some serious consideration before shaking her head. “No, I don’t think it suits you, dear.”

“Figures.” Bayou Runner said, with a half-chuckle, resigned he was stuck with those wretched things.

“Regardless of what you wear, you’ll still be the most handsome stallion in Manehatten,” his wife said, kissing him full on the lips.

“Only Manehatten?” Bayou Runner half joked and kissed his wife back. He always appreciated Fleur’s feminine touches. She made anything she touched come alive.

“Sir.” His butler, Shipshape, said, getting his boss’s attention. “You have a call. It requires your urgent attention. It’s from a concerned employee.”

“Ah, I’ll take it in my office.” Bayou Runner knew what that code meant. It had to do with his less-than-reputable business dealings. “Excuse me, dear.”

“Have fun.” Fleur didn’t sound that interested, assuming the message was about some banal problem.

It was better that way. His beloved wife or young son didn’t need to know about his criminal activities. He knew she’d never approve if she learned he was the Kingpin. He still hadn’t decided if he’d bring Cinnamon Tea into the family business yet. His father had pulled him into his, and what a disaster that had been. His “dear” father was an incompetent without the talent for the finer points of business, and his bumbling had landed Bayou Runner five long years in prison. But that was a lifetime ago, that Bayou Runner long since dead. He was a reformed civil servant, and nopony was the wiser.

The phone quivered with Bayou Runner’s pent-up fury. He should have guessed those Trixies would get underhoof. While they had accomplished little beyond saving their minotaur ally, the Kingpin wouldn’t allow such an insult to stand.

“I’ll be right there.” Bayou Runner’s tone returned to neutral, keeping his temper under wraps. He’d kept it simmering until the proper moment. “Sorry, honey, but business calls.”

“Pity, I was hoping for a night with the two of us alone,” Fleur said, her tone saucy and suggestive.

“I shan’t be long.” Bayou Runner said, giving his lovely wife a kiss. “Keep the bed warm for me.”

As he stomped into Alchemax Labs, he found everything in total disarray. Ponies scrambled about like chickens with their heads cut off, rushing about with no plan to restore order. His head of security, Security Detail, gave a weak smile as his boss approached.

“Hello, sir.” A brown-coated unicorn stallion said. “The crisis is over. We’ve subdued the threat.”

“So, you say you’ve done an amiable job in the face of a sudden crisis?” Before the stallion could reply, a mighty hoof made the foal see stars.

“Please, I..!” But Security Detail pleas fell on deaf ears as Bayou Runner tore the unicorn stallion apart.

“This never should have happened. It’s your job to see that intruders don’t steal away precious test subjects.” The Kingpin unleashed his pent-up fury, reducing the head guard’s face into a bruised paste. He dropped the unconscious Security Detail on the ground, rounding on the other pony that failed him.

“And you. You allowed them to slip through your hooves.” The Kingpin said to the tentacled mare who stood on the sidelines. Seeing her boss’s fury, Doctor Octopus did her best to placate him.

“The building’s defenses aren’t my job. I’m a scientist!” Octavia said, sweating under Bayou Runner’s glare. “I just chanced upon them. I would have gotten them, if that irritating Spider-mare hadn’t intervened.”

The Kingpin already knew this, but he made the scientist sweat further before pulling away his fury. That arachnid-based superhero had a habit of ruining his plans. Besides, Doctor Octopus was too valuable to discard. Security Detail, on the other hoof? With a satisfying snap, Bayou Runner crushed his collarbone with a single stomp. Blood splashed on the legs of his suit. Pity, he rather liked this suit, but examples had to be made. The Kingpin tolerated neither incompetence nor failure.

“Dispose of this trash.” The Kingpin said, walking away. “Tell me at least the crown is secure.”

“It remains secure,” Octavia said, joining him.

“Excellent.” Still, this situation was coming dangerously close to unraveling. This resistance won’t be tolerated any longer. “I believe it’s about time to unveil Proto’s gift.”

“I look forward to it.” Doctor Octopus’s eyes blazed with excitement. “With the crown, nothing is beyond your grasp.”

“Indeed.” But power came at a cost, and Bayou Runner didn’t trust a gift given to him by a stranger. It might contain hidden dangers. While there weren’t any obvious ones, Bayou Runner wouldn’t take any unnecessary risks. Still, power had its time and now was it.

They walked through the more secure part of the facility, guards saluting as they approached. A retinal scan allowed him access to Doctor Octopus’s private lab. It mirrored the scientist’s meticulous tidiness, all operating under the mare’s invisible symphony. A gentle classical piece played from an antique record player. Doctor Octopus cooed in delight as it hit her delicate ears.

Steam poured from the sealed briefcase as the Kingpin’s hoofprint unlocked it. Inside was a silver crown, a simple, unassuming piece of polished metal. But appearances often deceived.

“And it responds to my thoughts?” He asked as he placed the device on his head. His body gave a slight jerk as a jolt traveled through his brain, and then the entire world opened up to him. Senses he never realized were there became alight as they became aware. It was like a deaf person suddenly gaining hearing as the Kingpin gently floated into the air.

“Yes. Quite marvelous, isn’t it?” Doctor Octopus said, beaming. “There’s no sensation like it when you’re given a taste of the power cosmic.”

“Incredible.” The Kingpin stared at the energy gathering in his hoof as it crackled with power. With a thrust, a table exploded into dust as he released the energy. He could get used to this. Combined with his intellect and physical strength, he’d be unstoppable. A cruel smile formed across his lips. “How about we hunt some annoying insects?”