After the reception finally ended, Twilight decided that she’d rather take the ‘long way’ back to The Citadel. The whole day had been nothing but a near-endless source of stress for the mare and she knew that there wasn’t any way that she was going to be productive if she went back to either her office or her apartment’s study right this moment.

Major Rarity was tending to—though ‘fawning over’ was the term Twilight privately used in her head—the chancellor and getting him and his staff properly settled in for the night. Tomorrow morning they would be getting hosted by the griffon embassy, with the dragons hosting that same afternoon—there’d been a coin flip. Twilight expected it to be an altogether mentally exhausting experience. All the more reason to try and recenter herself this evening before being subjected to even more stress.

To that end, she was undertaking a stroll through the fort’s commercial hub.

Ponyville was the ‘heart’ of Harmony Six and, like a heart, it had a beat, with rising and falling periods of activity and quiet. In the predawn hours, a traveler would be hard-pressed to catch anycreature walking down the streets. Just after sunrise, however, the markets would be host to a rising din of traffic as the residents left their homes to go to work. Creatures shopped and talked and ate and worked all through the morning hours. Then lunch would come, along with a slight lull in the mayhem as creatures took a pause in their day to eat.

The afternoon would see a return to form though, reaching even greater highs of activity and noise towards evening as creatures took care of what few errands they had time—and money—for after leaving their jobs. Then came dinner and another lull. This lull would deepen though, and last for a good while longer than the lunch one. It wouldn’t last through the night though. Eventually the bars would close and foist their drunken patrons onto the streets, which is when the activity level would rise for the final time that day.

Presently, Ponyville was in the middle of its early evening winding-down period. Shops were encouraging their last customers of the day to complete their browsing and make their purchases. Cafes and restaurants were filling up with patrons either stopping by for a soothing drink after a long day of work or those who were looking to enjoy the day’s final meal before retiring back to their homes for the night. Store owners locking away their wares and drawing shutters of curtains closed over their windows gave the purple unicorn the very real sense of the island ‘putting itself to bed’, and it helped to relax her.

Twilight wasn’t quite as anxious now as she had been since getting word that the chancellor would be coming to visit. It was obvious that Fancy Pants was quite happy with both the Harmony Project and how she’d been managing the fortress thus far. Her career was safe and Harmony Six would continue to get the support that it needed in order to fulfill its mandated purpose. That all represented a considerable weight off of her withers.

Which wasn’t to say that some small amount of anxiety didn’t continue to occupy her gut. After all, the heart of Equestria’s leadership was still present on the island. If anything happened to either Fancy Pants or Neighsay while they were in Twilight’s care, the Cavalry would have to invent a new rank below private so that there was something suitably low enough to bust her down to as a fitting punishment. Twilight suspected that she wasn’t going to get a sound night’s sleep until the chancellor and vice chancellor were back aboard the Fleur De Lis and gone from sight over the horizon.

Until then, the little unicorn would have to seek out ways to reduce her stress level in the hopes of at least getting relaxed enough to doze off for a few hours at a time between the inevitable panic attacks. Right now, a walk around Ponyville surrounded by other relaxed creatures seemed to be doing the trick—

The mare’s ear twitched. She turned her head in the direction of the frustrated tones that she was picking up from nearby.

“—just been standing there for hours, not saying a word!” A mare was saying, sounding equal parts frustrated and nervous. “He won’t tell me what he wants, won’t speak to anypony, won’t leave. He just…stares!”

Her curiosity about the source of this latest disturbance piqued, Twilight headed in the direction of the commotion. She easily spotted the sable pegasus mare whose furtive expression marked her as the one with the issue. A unicorn stallion wearing a gray vest which identified them as one of Applejack’s MPs was patiently listening to the pegasus, a pad and pencil floating between them as he took notes on the mare’s complaint.

“He hasn’t really bothered anypony, so I didn’t flag any of you down earlier,” the sable mare continued with her explanation to the security pony. “I didn’t want to make a scene and it’s not like it’s against any laws for somepony to just stand around. But I want to close up for the day and he’s still here and he won’t even acknowledge me when I try to tell him to go!

“I don’t want him arrested or anything; I just want him out of the building so that I can go home,” the pegasus finished with something approaching an exasperated whine. She was clearly a pony who’d had a long day of her own.

Twilight’s gaze drifted upwards to the sign hanging above the door. It was then that the purple unicorn realized that this wasn’t a store, per se, but rather one of the local offices for an Equestrian shipping company. It was where creatures could go in order to arrange for space on ships that were owned or leased by the company for transporting cargo, passengers, or even just mail. Twilight’s eyes then dropped to one of the windows which allowed her to see into the dimly-lit interior.

The unicorn blinked in mild surprise. She recognized the stallion standing inside. They weren’t anypony that Twilight knew, specifically, but she did recall having seen them before. After all, it had only been a few hours ago. He even still had the boxes balanced on his back.

It was the earth pony who’d collided with Agent Nightshade while they’d been showing Chancellor Fancy Pants through Ponyville. He was standing inside in the middle of the office, staring. It was hard to tell from outside, but it didn’t look to Twilight like the pony was staring at anything in particular. He was just…looking straight ahead of him. A considerable amount of time passed before Twilight even noticed him blink.

The little purple unicorn detoured closer to the pair of ponies interacting outside the office. “What’s going on?”

“Please just move along—” The unicorn stallion’s statement started with a hint of annoyance before he’d fully turned his head enough to see who it was that was approaching. The MP’s eyes locked first on Twilight’s deep blue uniform, then darted to the sleeves of her forelegs in search of her rank. When no chevrons were found there, the stallion’s gaze instantly moved up to Twilight’s shoulders, where they finally locked on to the silver owls framing the mare’s neck.

Only then did the other unicorn finally seem to look at Twilight’s face. The MP’s features blanched noticeably, even in the dim evening light of the street lamps, and he quickly snapped to the position of attention. “Oh! Colonel Sparkle, ma’am; I didn’t realize it was you.” His hoof crossed over his chest in salute.

Twilight patiently returned the gesture. “It’s no problem, corporal.” She nodded her head in the direction of the earth pony visible through the window. “What does he want?”

The pegasus mare was the one who answered, looking somewhat more relieved upon seeing Twilight arrive. Likely because the office worker believed that if anypony could resolve an issue on the island, it was the pony in charge of the island. “Colonel, please, I just want that pony out of the building. He came in hours ago and hasn’t said one word the whole time. He just stands there, staring at the shipping schedule!”

“Have you tried talking to him?”

“Of course! I greeted him and everything when he first came in, but he basically ignored me,” the feathered mare insisted. “Some ponies are like that—you can’t work a customer-facing job and not deal with the occasional rude jerk—so I didn’t think much of it at the time.

“But then he just kept on not moving or talking. I’d try to ask him if he wanted help every so often, but he never answered me even once! I had other customers to help and work to do, so I just started ignoring him too. Like I was telling the officer here,” the mare gestured towards the MP, “he hasn’t done anything wrong—I don’t think—and I don’t want him arrested or anything.

“I just want him outside the office so I can lock up for the night,” the pegasus jabbed a wing at the ground, fixing Twilight with a pleading look.

“Alright; we’ll go talk to him,” Twilight assured the other mare, giving the MP a quick glance. “You just wait out here. Corporal?” The unicorn nodded and fell into step behind the purple mare as she headed inside.

The cyan earth pony didn’t so much as twitch or flick an ear as the pair entered the office. He just kept staring straight ahead. A quick glance by Twilight confirmed that the stallion was indeed looking rather intently at the posted list of vessels which the shipping company owned or chartered, along with the dates that they’d be leaving Harmony Fortress and what ports they were heading to.

If the pony had given a name during their earlier brief encounter that day, Twilight didn’t remember it. Given how the mare outside had described her—non—interactions with the earth pony since his arrival, she suspected that no name had been provided to her or the MP either. But it was worth at least asking the question to make sure.

She glanced at the uniformed stallion at her flank. “Do we know his name?”

“No, ma’am.”

Twilight shrugged and turned her attention back towards the earth pony. “Sir?” Perhaps unsurprisingly, she didn’t garner a response either. She supposed that she really shouldn’t have been surprised, given what she’d been told thus far. On the other hoof, Twilight had been on the island long enough to learn that creatures would often have a lot more to say to her than they would to just about anycreature else. After all: Twilight was the mare in charge. Many creatures took this to mean that, if they complained long—and especially loudly—enough to her, then the mare might do something about their issue.

The purple unicorn stepped around the earth pony and positioned herself directly in his line of sight and repeated her query. “Sir? I’m Colonel Twilight Sparkle. Can we talk outside for a moment…?”

Her words trailed off as she finally noticed the glassy quality of the cyan pony’s gaze. It looked distant and unfocused. Like he was lost in thought or caught up in a daydream. He certainly hadn’t heard anything that Twilight had just said.

The unicorn MP stepped up beside her and peered at the other pony. “Pupils aren’t dilated or pinprick,” he noted aloud.

“He’s not drunk or high,” Twilight provisionally agreed, before adding a qualifying: “At least, not on anything with visible effects like that.” The unicorn was running through a list of potions she knew of that might leave the imbiber in a similar disassociated state. There were a few that came to mind, but she dismissed them all as possible candidates for the stallion’s current state. None of the potions she could think of which could produce this level of apparent obliviousness to the world would permit the pony to stand under their own power at the same time.

“He’s clearly under the effects of something,” the corporal said. “Maybe some new kind of drug?”

“It’s possible,” Twilight conceded, though she didn’t like the idea of some unknown substance being available on her island, especially if it could affect ponies like this. There were less concerning possibilities though. After all, there were a lot of creatures that came through Harmony Fortress, and not all of their physiologies reacted the same way to the same substances. “He may also have just used some seasonings that he shouldn’t have,” she hoped.

“Either way, we should get him to the clinic to be evaluated,” Twilight decided. “Sir, if you can hear us: we’re taking you to see a doctor to get checked out.” She reached out with a hoof and tried to guide the earth pony towards the door.

The stallion started to turn with Twilight’s gentle push, but then abruptly stumbled and spun back around until they were once more staring wordlessly at the board. She frowned and tried one more time to pry the earth pony away, only to be met with the same lack of success. The unicorn MP with her soon lost patience with the other stallion.

“Alright, buddy; we’re not playing this game anymore.” He lit his horn and wrapped the earth pony in his telekinetic field. “Time for you to leave.” He started to forcibly drag the presumably catatonic pony towards the door.

In response, the earth pony started to try and drag themselves back to the posting board once more, though with only marginal success against the soldier’s stronger magical hold. It was still taking considerable effort to haul away the stubborn stallion though, if the MP’s grimace was any indication. If he kept fighting, somepony was going to get hurt.

“Get ready to catch him,” Twilight warned the gray-vested unicorn. The moment she received a nod from him, she fired off a modestly-powered stun bolt at the earth pony, striking him directly between the eyes. Instantly, the cyan stallion went limp, sagging slightly in the magical field enveloping him. Twilight hesitated for a brief moment as she checked to ensure the stallion was indeed unconscious before using her own telekinesis to shift him across the back of the MP. “Let’s get him to the clinic so he can be checked out.”

It wasn’t the ideal conclusion that Twilight might have hoped for, but the purple mare reasoned that it wasn’t the worst outcome either. The pegasus mare could close up her office and nopony had truly gotten hurt. There was still the matter of finding out what had caused the earth pony to act as he had though. Twilight was conflicted on whether or not she wanted to learn this was all the result of some new kind of drug. On the one hoof, that would provide for a ready explanation of the earth pony’s actions this evening. On the other hoof, Twilight did not want to have to deal with drug smuggling going through her island—especially not while the chancellor was present.

Twilight wasn’t surprised to find that the clinic was still open. It was always open, as there was no telling when a creature might get hurt or fall seriously ill. What did surprise the fort’s commander was that Doctor Fluttershy was still the physician on duty, even at this late hour.

“I work rotating shifts,” the pale yellow pegasus explained as Twilight and the security pony jointly levitated the unconscious earth pony onto the bed in one of the clinic’s examination rooms. “It helps me to get to know all of my staff, as well as all of our regular patients that work different shifts.”

Doctor Fluttershy started to look over the cyan stallion, performing a basic cursory physical examination. She glanced at the pair of unicorns who’d brought her this latest patient. “What happened to him?”

“We’re not completely sure,” Twilight responded for the both of them. “He wandered into a shipping office a few hours ago and started staring at the departure board.” She glanced at the MP to see if there was anything more that the other unicorn wanted to add, but he just nodded in agreement. “The mare working in the office tried telling him to leave so that she could close up for the night, but he ignored her. He wouldn’t react to either of us either. He didn’t answer us when we talked to him, or come with us when we tried to escort him out.”

Fluttershy nodded, continuing with her examination. “Then he collapsed?”

“No, I stunned him.”

The pegasus mare paused for a moment, before glancing at Twilight out of the corner of her eye. “He wouldn’t talk to you, so you stunned him?” She let out a little huff before turning away from the purple mare and picking up a stethoscope with her wing.

Twilight frowned. “I didn’t stun him just because he wouldn’t talk to—!” Her protests were interrupted by the doctor slipping the stethoscope over her ears and signalling for silence as she began her auscultations. The unicorn stifled her rebuttal, opting to silently fume instead.

She took a breath before turning to speak to the unicorn stallion in low tones. “I think we’re good here, corporal. Go ahead and write up a report and then return to your duties. Limit the citation to a Section 3.01(c), ‘failure to comply’.” It was a minor offense under most circumstances, and could be settled by paying a modest fine. The pegasus office worker had said that she didn’t want to press any charges for the trespassing, and so Twilight wouldn’t. However, that didn’t change the fact that several other regulations had been violated on top of the trespassing.

The corporal nodded and left. Twilight waited in silence for the physician to finish her evaluation. “His vitals all appear normal,” Fluttershy finally announced, slipping the stethoscope from her ears.

“Take a blood sample to test for any drugs in his system,” Twilight told her. “When he wakes up, collect some urine too. I want to know if he was under the influence of anything.”

Fluttershy made no move to comply with the unicorn’s orders. “...Is he one of your soldiers?”

“No; he’s a civilian as far as I know.”

“‘Failure to comply’ under a three-oh-one-see is a minor infraction when applied to civilians. It’s not sufficient to procure a warrant for blood,” the pegasus said.

The doctor was technically correct, Twilight acknowledged. While Harmony Six was, first and foremost, a military installation and thus subject to military penal codes, it had been deemed to be unreasonable for the soldiers assigned to the island, and the civilians who happened to be living on it or passing through—especially the non-Equestrians—to be held to the same rigorous degree of harshness that was expected for soldiers. So provisions had been written into the codes that created lesser tiers of offenses for those civilians. Offenses that would have seen an enlisted pony getting serious punishments only incurred modest fines for civilians.

This also meant that Twilight couldn’t treat civilians like they were one of her soldiers. Regulations allowed for a commander to order any soldier under their command to undergo a drug test to determine their fitness for duty at any time. However, that same latitude did not extend to the common pony—or creature—without her first being able to establish a sound reasoning as to why the test was needed.

That being said, Twilight wasn’t really interested in using the results to further punish the stallion. She just wanted to know if there was something present on Harmony she needed to be aware of. Something to tell Applejack to be looking out for, or a reason to have Rarity’s customs ponies be more thorough in their searches of cargo. “I won’t have him charged if you find anything, doctor. I just want an explanation for his behavior.”

“And I don’t want to violate my patient’s trust,” Fluttershy lightly rebuked. “You can ask him to submit to a voluntary screening when he wakes up. Or you can charge him with something more serious that would allow you to compel me to collect a sample.” There was the slightest hint of challenge in the otherwise soft-spoken voice.

Twilight’s muzzle twisted into a slight frown but she elected not to push the issue. She wasn’t going to get into an argument with the physician over this, especially when she was forced to acknowledge that the doctor was correct where the letter of the regulation was concerned. Following the regulations was important, even if they happened to be inconvenient in the moment. “Very well, doctor. I’ll ask him when he wakes up.”

The purple unicorn lit her horn and extended her magic towards the unconscious earth pony on the examination bed, dispelling the residual magic from her earlier stunning spell. Almost immediately, the stallion began to groan and stir on the bed as consciousness began to return to him. Fluttershy glanced at her out of the corner of her eye that wasn’t hidden away by her unbound mane but didn’t say anything.

For her part, Twilight allowed herself a satisfied smirk. When the doctor saw the earth pony’s catatonic state, she’d be obliged to draw blood to perform tests on it in the hopes of determining a potential pharmacological cause, the unicorn reasoned. Doctor Fluttershy surely wouldn’t decline to provide treatment for a patient who was obviously suffering from the ill-effects of something. Those results would reveal the presence of any illicit substances in his system and Twilight would have her answer.

The cyan stallion’s eyes fluttered open and he started to glance around the room. “W-wha…? Where am I? What happened?” His gaze locked onto Twilight first. “Colonel Sparkle?”

Both ponies exchanged mutually-confused looks with one another, and largely for the same reason: neither had expected for the earth pony to ‘wake up’ in the clinic. Twilight’s own shock was very briefly replaced by a moment of frustration that her intended plan hadn’t worked out, but that feeling was quickly overshadowed as she realized that having access to a pony who was finally willing to talk with her would help get her the answers that she was after.

“You’ve recovered. Good. I’d like to ask you some questions about what happened at the shipping office.” Twilight floated a quill and roll of parchment out of her saddlebag.

“...Recovered? I was hurt?” The stallion glanced over at the nearby physician before giving the parts of his body that were visible a look. Finding no signs of wounds or bandaging, he amended his question. “Or sick?”

“‘Catatonic’ is likely the most medically correct term to describe the condition you were found in,” Twilight supplied, giving the nearby pegasus mare a look as she sought confirmation. Fluttershy didn’t react, likely because she was unwilling to agree to a diagnosis based on symptoms that she hadn’t witnessed first-hoof. Instead, the physician began another brief examination of her patient, now that he was awake and—apparently, now—responsive.

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

“Remember?” The stallion’s features scrunched up in concentration as he sifted through his memories. “I was going home after some shopping…” he began, hesitantly. His words only became less sure sounding as he went on. “I…needed to leave?” He seemed to be searching Twilight’s face for confirmation of his own recounting of events, which only served to further frustrate the purple mare’s quest for answers.

“Is that why you were at the shipping office? You were leaving the island?”

“...But I live here,” the earth pony insisted. “Why would I leave? Where would I even go?”

Twilight let out a mildly exasperated sigh. “I was hoping you could tell us. You were the one standing in the office for hours looking at the departure board.”

“I don’t remember that.”

“Clearly. Did you eat anything unusual today?” The unicorn asked, changing tacks. “Maybe stop somewhere for a few drinks?”

“Nothing that I don’t usually have,” the stallion replied. “There’s a minotaur-run bistro near my apartment that I eat breakfast at, and then I grabbed lunch later at the Ponyville market. I don’t drink. At least, not anything that’s not water or juice,” he insisted.

“Would you mind submitting to a drug test?” Twilight inquired, nodding her head in Fluttershy’s direction. “It’s possible that your food was tainted with something.” The fortress’ commander was willing to entertain the notion that the stallion hadn’t—knowingly—been operating under the influence of any mind-altering substances. It wasn’t impossible for him to have been exposed—either accidentally or intentionally—without his knowledge. Though Twilight didn’t yet have any worthwhile theories which would have explained the why of it. That could come later if anything was found.

“I suppose that’s alright,” the stallion agreed. Then, a little more hesitantly, he asked, “Am I in trouble, colonel?”

Twilight opened her mouth and was about to respond in the affirmative…but then stopped herself. She’d told the MP to write up a citation against the stallion, but that had been before she’d had a chance to speak with him. When she’d been working under the theory that he’d intentionally intoxicated himself somehow. However, now that she’d seen how the earth pony reacted upon being told of his earlier actions, she wasn’t so sure anymore. He could be lying, she supposed. Ponies involved in illegal activity often lied, after all. But if that was the case, then this stallion had missed out on receiving his cutie mark in theater, because his acting was extremely believable.

“If your food or drink was tainted somehow, then no; you’re not in trouble,” Twilight assured him, making a mental note to tell the corporal outside to hold off on publishing the report and the citation until Fluttershy had concluded her tests.

She looked at the pegasus in question. “Please let me know if you find anything concerning, doctor. If tainted food is indeed on the island, we need to know as soon as possible. Especially if it can cause creatures to behave erratically like that.”

Harmony Fortress did have a few acres of arable land that allowed for the cultivation of some fruits and vegetables, but it wasn’t nearly enough to support the island’s entire population. Food needed to be shipped across the ocean constantly, and in large quantities. If some of those provisions had gone bad for some reason, they needed to know so that it could be confiscated and replaced. Quickly.

Fluttershy nodded and started to collect the needles and tubes that she would need in order to perform the tests. “...I’ll let you know if anything is found that you need to know about, Colonel Sparkle.” She then turned a cool blue eye towards the unicorn. “If you’re done with your questions now, I’d like you to leave. He’s still my patient.”

Twilight kept from saying anything in rebuttal in front of the earth pony civilian. The island’s population didn’t need to know about the friction between herself and the fortress’ senior medical official. Instead, she merely nodded and left. After having a brief conversation with the MP corporal about the report she wanted him to write, Twilight left the clinic entirely and started her journey back to The Citadel.

Harmony Fortress had slid into its final period of increased activity for the day as the bars all started to close and disgorge their clientele into the street. The air was filled with the drunken caterwalling of poorly-pitched songs sung in unsynchronized choruses and slurred conversations between friends and lovers whose blood-alcohol content had robbed them of the ability to exchange words at anything quieter than a boisterous shout. Captain Applejack’s security ponies were doing their best to herd the ambling mass of revelers off of the streets and into their homes.

After the exceptionally long day that she’d had—though one that had been perhaps more emotionally exhausting than strictly physical—Twilight was very much looking forward to getting back to her own bed. She’d want to be well-rested for the next day of chaperoning Chancellor Fancy Pants and his delegation. The visits with the dragons and the griffons were sure to be particularly draining, she was sure.

Just the thought of listening to Ember and Gilda blaming each other for the state of the hostilities between their two nations was enough to make the unicorn groan aloud.

“Now you look like a pony who’s in dire need of a cupcake. With extra sprinkles!”

The purple mare jerked at the sound of the proclamation coming from nearby. Then she blinked in rapid succession as she stared at the pink-frosted cupcake that was being held right in front of her, taking up nearly all of her field of vision. Her gaze then darted to the equally pink hoof that was holding the pastry aloft, following it along the rest of the foreleg until she finally found its owner.

“You!”

“I!” Responded a familiar-looking grin. There was a pause, then: “Okay, your turn!”

Twilight blinked again, the next words that she’d intended to say derailed by the rather unexpected follow-up from the pink-on-pink earth pony. What should have words focused on trying to get an identity out of the mare instead manifested themselves into a singular perplexed “...What?”

“Oh, that’s wrong; but you were very close!” The mare, who was still holding up the cupcake, said. “You should have gone with: ‘why’.”

“Why?” Twilight was unable to keep herself from echoing as her brain struggled to resolve where this conversation was heading.

“Because it is sometimes,” came the nonplussed reply from the earth pony, as if the conversation were still flowing along an easily navigable path.

The unicorn felt like she was still struggling though. “It’s what sometimes?” She desperately reached for clarification, hoping to find some way back towards comprehending what the other pony was talking about.

“Oh, no; I don’t think it can be that any time.”

“...What can’t be?”

“Right!”

“What’s right?”

“No, ‘what’s wrong; I just told you that!” The pink mare replied, now looking at Twilight with a mildly concerned expression. “Are you feeling okay, Twilight?”

Twilight closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She spent a few moments sifting through the preceding exchange of words that she categorically refused to qualify as being a ‘conversation’, lest word of her doing so got back to one of her professors at the university and they retroactively rescinded her literary degree for such an affront. Instead, the unicorn opted to promptly discard the whole affair as being utterly unintelligible. Her hoof came up and started to massage her temple as she finally released a long-suffering sigh. “I think I’m starting to get a headache…” she muttered under her breath.

“Oh. Well then you should go back into the clinic and get looked at,” the earth pony unhelpfully suggested with what sounded like complete sincerity, bereft of even a hint of sarcasm. “You probably should have mentioned it while you were in there having that stallion checked out.”

“How did you—?” Twilight cut her own question off mid-sentence. If the unknown mare had been close enough to see her come out and—apparently—had been specifically waiting for her in order to deliver the cupcake, then it stood to reason that the earth pony had watched all three of them enter the clinic in the first place.

“Who are you?”

The pink mare waved her hoof at Twilight. “Woah; hey! You can’t go tossing that question around just yet; we’re not at that point in the story.”

“...What?”

“Besides, there’s way more important questions you should be asking creatures before we get to that one!” The earth pony insisted, flashing Twilight a broad grin.

“I remember you from my first day on the island,” the purple unicorn desperately tried to restart the conversation that she’d intended from the moment she’d realized who the pony holding the cupcake was. “I’ve been trying to find you, so that I could compensate you for all of those pastries. I can’t accept gifts,” Twilight explained, her magic already flipping up the lid of one of her saddlebags. She didn’t carry around a lot of bits as a general rule, since there wasn’t a lot that she needed to actually buy in the way of daily necessities, but she’d be able to write out a voucher that could be redeemed at the quartermaster’s office for fair compensation in hard currency.

The earth pony’s expression shifted into one of abject horror. It was as though the mare had been sent physically reeling by the fortress commander’s words. “You can’t accept gifts?! That’s horrible!” It was difficult to tell if the pink pony was more outraged at the revelation, or if she was simply expressing indignation on Twilight’s behalf. In either case, the exclamations were loud enough to draw quite a few annoyed stares from those inebriated enough to take exception to unnecessarily boisterous noises.

“That means you haven’t had any birthday presents! Or Hearth’s Warming presents! Or Mare’s Day presents! Or Unification Day presents—I know that one doesn’t involve gift-giving usually, but the hypothetical opportunity still exists!” The mare hastily amended before diving back into her verbal list. “What about Yule Day? Or your Cuteceañera? Or Nightmare Night?

“You’ve never gotten gifts for any of them in your whole life?!” The earth pony produced parchment and a wax crayon and began to scribble. “I’m going to need to work a lot of overtime if I’m going to make up the deficit before I leave…”

Twilight forgot about the voucher amid the onslaught of questions, “I meant professionally!” She protested. Then her mind caught up to the—nearly—all-encompassing list that had been rattled out and she blinked once more before narrowing her eyes at the pink mare.

“...Why didn’t you mention Hearts and Hooves Day?”

The pink mare poked her head up from behind the parchment, her previously pained features flowing seamlessly into a knowing look. Nothing was said aloud. She simply regarded the unicorn with a slight quirk of her lips and a held stare whose meaningfulness felt as though it gained considerable weight by virtue of being offered over the top of the parchment still hiding most of her features.

Twilight felt her cheeks flush, her mouth opening and closing wordlessly for several excruciatingly long seconds. “Give me your name,” she didn’t quite growl once she found her voice again, her telekinesis resuming its search for a quill and roll of parchment within her saddlebag.

“Do I have to? I’m kind of using it right now,” the other mare quipped, her lips pulled into a broad, teasing, smile. “Plus, I got it from my mother so it holds a lot of sentimental value for me.”

The purple unicorn glared now, her patience wearing thin. “I need it.”

“Why? What’s wrong with the one you already have?” The innocent-sounding mare asked with an impressively earnest expression. “Personally, I think ‘Twilight Sparkle’ sounds really nice! Certainly way better than ‘Black Snooty’…”

“...Your name is: Black Snooty?” Twilight asked hesitantly, her eyes wandering over the body of the pink-on-slightly-darker-pink coat and mane of the earth pony standing in front of her. The unicorn realized that she hadn’t seen the cupcake from earlier in a while, but that tidbit of information didn’t quite register on a significantly conscious level as she kept trying to navigate the winding exchange she was having with this stranger.

Heavy emphasis on the leading syllable.

“Of course not; that’d be a ridiculous name for a pony like me to have!” The earth pony deflected with a snort. “I’m much more of a Periwinkle Booty,” she snickered, giving her hind end a little wiggle. Before Twilight could comment one way or the other, the mare was suddenly standing right beside her, a foreleg draped over the colonel’s withers as the unicorn was drawn in close for a conspiratorial-style stage whisper. “Between you and me: I ‘taste-test’ way too many of my own cupcakes; if you know what I mean?” The earth pony’s nearest baby blue eye gave an exaggerated wink.

Twilight jerked and took several steps to the side in order to free herself of the invasion of her personal space. “...Periwinkle is actually more blue than pink,” was all she managed to idly say, her thoughts otherwise too preoccupied with trying to fathom how the earth pony had moved so fast as to be right up on the unicorn in less than a heartbeat.

“Really? Huh. Weird. Because that name just sounds pink; you know what I mean? Like, I can’t hear it and not think about something pink. Like chartreuse!”

“That’s more of a yellow—” Twilight snapped her muzzle shut with an audible smack before shaking her thoughts vigorously back into order. She glared at the earth pony, her magic lancing back into her saddlebag once more, in search of writing materials.

“Tell me your name!” Twilight was all but seething now, at her wit’s end with this mare’s shenanigans. The unicorn had half a mind to call out for assistance from an MP in order to have the pony taken into custody; except that Twilight couldn’t think of any charges that could have been levied—if only provisionally—to justify the detainment. ‘Being flighty’ wasn’t something covered in the fort’s judicial code.

Twilight made a note to send a request back to Canterlot to have the statutes amended in order to correct the oversight…

“Chartreuse is yellow? Well that’s disappointing. Why can’t the words that sound pink actually be pink? I’d have loved to be associated with a word like ‘puce’...” The earth pony muttered in a dejected tone.

“Puce is a shade of pink—” Twilight corrected automatically before she finally lost her patience with her fruitless efforts to find her quill. She knew that she’d packed it earlier! She wrenched the saddlebag from her back and held it open in front of herself so that she could physically look inside. “—Where is my quill?!”

“Here, you can use this one,” the earth pony said, holding out a scarlet quill resting upon her hoof.

Twilight glanced up and saw the offered writing implement. “...Thank you,” she said reluctantly, taking up the feather in her magic. Then her eyes narrowed as she started to scrutinize the all-too-familiar-looking quill. “...Hey! This is mine!”

The purple unicorn looked up and glared…at a vacant section of road where she could have sworn there had been a pink earth pony standing only a moment ago.

Her head whipped around from one direction to the other, but Twilight wasn’t able to spot any sign of what should have been a profoundly visible pony, even considering the late hour. There didn’t seem to be any sign of her, or an indication of which direction the mare had gone. Twilight spent a few moments fuming at the fact that the pink earth pony had managed to effectively vanish as if by magic a second time before floating the quill into her open saddlebag.

That was when the unicorn hesitated, her eyes narrowing slightly as she beheld something within that she didn’t recognize. Something that she was certain hadn’t been in the bag earlier in the day: a piece of parchment that had been folded into a cube.

Cautiously, Twilight extracted the paper box, holding it aloft with her telekinesis. She vaguely recognized the technique which had been used to create the paper craft as being a form of traditional art practiced by the kirin. The purple unicorn noted that the little box had some weight to it—not a lot, but there was clearly something inside of the little container. So she used her magic to carefully unfold the parchment…

…And revealed the same cupcake with pink frosting and liberally covered in sprinkles which had been offered to her by the earth pony earlier.

Twilight’s lip quirked up into a resigned smile. It seemed that disappearing into thin air wasn’t the only feat of magic which the earth pony was capable of performing. Filching the unicorn’s quill and planting a confection into her saddlebag without the little purple mare being any the wiser was an impressive enough accomplishment to—narrowly—outweigh her annoyance. Now that she’d been granted a moment to process their interaction, Twilight had to wonder if the pink pony’s intent hadn’t been to intentionally frustrate her in order to keep Twilight distracted by her own annoyance.

Distracting the mark was ‘Slight-of-Hoof 101’. And Twilight had fallen for it without hesitation, because it hadn’t occurred to her to suspect any sort of ulterior motive from the baker. She’d know better for next time—something inside Twilight simply knew that there would indeed be a ‘next time’.

Deciding that there wasn’t likely to be any lasting harm in it—and the cupcake smelled very good—Twilight took a bite. Just as with all of the pastries from that first encounter, it was one of the best cupcakes that the unicorn had ever had.

The unicorn was mid-chew when she noticed that there was something written on the unfolded parchment still clutched in her magic. Curious, the mare’s telekinetic field smoothed out the paper and she read over the words:

You’re not asking the right creatures the right questions.

Why are you here?

Twilight couldn’t help but feel that the nominally cryptic message lost something of its intended weight due to the fact that it was written in pink crayon.

Still, there was something to be said for not discounting offered information simply due to its appearance. While the earth pony was clearly excentric—which felt like a considerable understatement after this most recent interaction—there was something more to her than meets the eye. She had managed to avoid all of Captain Applejack’s attempts to locate her for several weeks after all.

“Why am I here?” Twilight murmured under her breath as she folded away the parchment into her saddlebag and resumed making her way back to The Citadel. It was a simple-sounding question with an obvious answer: Twilight was at Harmony Six because she’d been assigned here as its commander.

As for why she’d been granted the assignment: it had been presented to her as something of a reward. Her actions at White Tail had seen her branded as a ‘war hero’ during Equestria’s war with the zebras. Surviving the Battle of Canterhorn Mountain had also served to further inflame her ‘legend’ within the Cavalry. Promotions had come quickly as a result. Most of her peers were the better part of a decade her senior in age, as well as rank. There were paltry few commands available for a pony of her rank as a result. Not without stepping on the hooves of more senior colonels with powerful friends in the Cavalry and the government.

Twilight had been staring at the strong possibility of winding up on the staff of some general—hardly a terrible fate for an officer, but certainly nothing befitting ‘The Hero of White Tail’. So, when Harmony Fortress had completed construction…she’d been given the—dubious—honor of being made the distant island fort’s commanding officer. She was a new colonel with a garrison command. It was practically fast-tracking her for brigadier!

What other reason for the assignment could there be if not as a way to help propel a star officer up through the ranks?

Though, as fate would have it, there was hardly better timing available to the unicorn than right now to seek confirmation of her theory: she had the chancellor within hoof-reach, after all. While Fancy Pants hardly made the assignment decisions for all of Equestria’s military installations, Harmony was his project. He was bound to have had a say in who was placed in command here. Or at least final approval of anypony suggested by the Cavalry’s leadership. He’d know why Twilight was here if anypony did—

…asking the right creatures…

Twilight paused midstep as she ran the message’s words through her mind once more. She even spared a moment to reread the parchment to be sure she wasn’t misremembering them.

Not ponies; creatures…

After that conversation—which was a descriptor that Twilight was still only provisionally using to refer to that exchange—the unicorn wasn’t so sure that the pink mare was the sort to pick her words without special care. She wasn’t being inclusive for the sake of political correctness, Twilight didn’t think. She’d been suggesting that the one who held the actual answer wasn’t a pony.

The first place that Twilight’s eyes darted to after that thought entered her head was to the airship moored at the top of The Citadel. The alicorns would certainly have had the diplomatic pull to influence the selection process, she supposed. Of course, Twilight couldn’t come up with any reason why the alicorns might want her here specifically.

That didn’t mean that the alicorns hadn’t had a reason.

Deciding that she wasn’t going to come up with any meaningful answers standing around Ponyville in the middle of the night, Twilight finished her cupcake and headed for her quarters. She’d find the time to ask the chancellor about some of the details behind her appointment. Then she might have some inkling as to why the reason for her being sent to Harmony Six would even matter.

Twilight recognized that Harmony Fortress was an important posting, and that its commanding officer would be in a position to wield a lot of influence; but what exactly was she going to accomplish here that no other reasonably competent officer could?

What made Twilight so special?

Author's Note

Can you even cast a foreshadow at night?

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