It was a peaceful afternoon in Falmouth, and Misty and Faven were out on the seafront. Faven had the day off work, so she was taking the opportunity to spend time with her daughter. Given that Misty had been taken from her so long ago, Faven felt she had a lot of catching up to do when it came to her relationship with Misty.

"Had a good day so far?" Faven asked, as they looked in the direction of the amusement park. There were all sorts of things under construction both on the land and on the pier, including what looked like a very scary roller coaster. Misty didn't like roller coasters at all.

"Yeah," Misty replied. "Mom, this is gonna sound weird, but I've never truly figured out something- my age. Opaline never said anything about the topic, and given, well, you're my mom I was wondering if you could shed any light on the matter."

Faven nodded. "I noticed people assume you're a teenager based on your build." She sighed. "Misty, I'm not quite sure how to tell you this... but you're nearly twenty."

Misty's jaw dropped in surprise. She looked down into the water at her reflection. "What? How?"

Faven walked over and put a hand on her shoulder. "I had you when I was in my thirties. Alphie and I had been married a few years, but we'd always wanted children. Sadly things didn't go to plan- I lost the first pregnancy."

Misty looked in confusion. "Sorry, but I'm not quite sure what you mean."

"I miscarried."

Misty looked upset. "Sorry for your loss, mom."

"It's OK. You weren't to know. Understandably, it made me a bit reluctant to try again, but when I did get pregnant again I was a bit worried it would happen again. Thankfully, I carried to term and you were born." Faven looked down. "That's why you going missing affected me so badly. The universe had finally allowed me to become something I'd always wanted to be- a mother- and now that was snatched away from me. I don't think I could bear to lose you again, Misty, which is why I want to make the most of the here and now."

Suddenly, the pair's attention was drawn by noise from the yard. An engine was pulling some parts for what looked like an amusement park ride into the sidings. The engine looked very strange. He was long and boxy, and although he was emmitting steam from a chimney he looked like a clockwork toy. He also had no running board, which gave him a very odd appearance.

"Easy does it!" called a voice from the footplate, as they rolled to a stop. "Just like at the Bluebell, eh Neville?"

"I guess," the engine replied, as a young woman hopped down to uncouple him. The young woman had mixed purple and white skin, making it look like somebody had emptied several cans of paint on her. She had purple, turquoise, and pink hair styled not too differently to Misty, and like most engine drivers was clad in a boilersuit.

"Perhaps best to make this a quick turnaround," Neville said. "The sooner I'm back on home turf the better."

Misty looked at Faven. "He doesn't seem too friendly."

"Misty, don't judge a book by its cover," Faven said firmly. "There could be any number of reasons he's keen to head home."

Misty nodded. "Yes mom."

Just then, they heard an unfamiliar voice.

"Oh, I bid farewell to the port and the land/
And I paddle away from brave England's white sands/
To search for my long ago forgotten friends/
To search for the place I hear all sailors end!"

Before the female voice they had heard joined in.

"As the souls of the dead fill the space of my mind!
I'll search without sleeping 'til peace I can find!
I fear not the weather, I fear not the sea/
I remember the fallen, do they think of me?
When their bones in the ocean forever will be."

Later on, Misty was getting Bellerophon prepared to do some shunting when Charles backed into the shed. "What utter rudeness!" he said. "Fancy him ignoring me like that!"

"Charles, nobody is under orders to speak to you," Zipp said.

"Well, they should be! I am an very important engine!"

Bellerophon looked over. "What's going on?"

Charles huffed. "That new engine, the one that looks like he's made of LEGO bricks. I said hello to him as I passed earlier, and he didn't reply! I know the Q1s could be a solitary bunch, but to ignore another engine's greetings is just plain rude!"

"Maybe he didn't hear you?" Misty suggested.

"Perhaps with all the racket he was making," Charles grumbled. "Oh well. Off to the next job."

As Bellerophon left the yard, Sophie backed in to take on fuel. "Hello everybody! Have any of you met the new engine?"

"Don't bother," Charles said. "He's rude. I heard he said something about being back on home turf, the better. Clearly he thinks he's better than us."

Sophie was surprised. "That's an odd attitude for a preserved engine to have. He may just be homesick!"

"Possibly, but then again he's not hugely friendly."

Charles hammered away from the depot and went to collect his train, whilst Rebecca arrived with passengers. "Don't talk to that new engine!" he said. "He's rude and thinks we're below him!"

Rebecca hadn't talked to Neville yet. "OK then," she said. "Charles, I know you're puffed up in the radiator, but isn't there a possibility you may have gotten this wrong?"

"Wrong? Me? Never!"

Later on, Bellerophon was shunting the sidings at Perranwell when Neville rolled in with a freight train. He had to stop before the red signal, and so he did.

"Hello!" Bellerophon called. "I don't believe we've met!"

Just then, Salty rumbled by with a goods train from Newham Docks. "An Ugly Duckling out here!" he said. "Quite a varied bunch, we are!"

Neville sighed. "There really is no point, is there?"

"No point in what?" Bellerophon asked.

"I'll never fit in," Neville said. "No matter where I go or what I do people and engines mistreat me. I can't help being a wartime economy design."

Misty secured Bellerophon in place and walked over. "It sounds as though you're hurting."

"What could possibly give you that impression?" Neville said, sarcastically.

Misty didn't pick up on the sarcasm. "You struggle to make friends, and the distrust others feel towards you means they don't always see who you truly are."

"If they knew what I've been through they wouldn't act the way they do."

Misty looked at Neville in surprise. "What do you mean?"

Neville looked pained. "It was a long time ago, far away. But I remember what they did... what type of people they were... why they all deserved to die."

Radstock, April 1942

The air raid sirens blared overhead, the familiar rising and falling tone striking fear into anybody who heard them. They all knew what this meant.

The Germans were here, and another bombing raid was imminent.

"Neville, you're needed immediately!" shouted a member of railway staff. "Bath urgently needs more anti aircraft guns to ward off the Luftwaffe, and you're the only engine strong enough to move them!"

"On my way!" Neville said, and he moved off from the shed towards the sidings. A rake of rail mounted anti aircraft guns, leftovers from the previous war, sat in the sidings. They were old and not hugely accurate, but every bit of flak fire could count- after all, Neville had heard a Home Guard member had shot a Stuka down with a revolver once.

He was hooked up, and they got on their way towards Bath. The run was difficult, not least as the enemy were aware of the railway line and the fact war equipment was being moved via it. Neville knew one of the engines that had been working an ammunition train which a fighter had strafed, and had had a narrow escape as a result.

He hammered through Midford and started the climb towards the tunnel, working hard to keep the train moving. Bath was depending on him. The more bombers got shot down, the fewer bombs fell on Bath, and the more people survived.

Once through the tunnel, he rolled down the gradient and into Bath yard. But the sight that awaited him was horrifying.

On the left hand side of the line sat the engine sheds of Bath Green Park. Or rather, where they had been. Buildings had been flattened and torn apart, the materials used to build them scattered about like toys. There were fires burning everywhere, and firemen were working hard to put out the blaze.

Neville advanced deeper into the smoke, and saw something which he knew would haunt him for the rest of his life.

The remains of dead locomotives lay everywhere. Many had parts scattered across the landscape, and others had been blown apart. One engine had taken a direct hit from a bomb, his boiler blown apart into fragments. Another engine, still alive, was pinned down under collapsed girders, begging for help.

The scene was horrifying enough, but accompanying it all were the screams of the dying and injured. Neville knew he would never be able to forget that horrible sound.

He backed out of the conflagration to find help. "We need help here!" He looked up at the sky and saw German aircraft flying overhead, still dropping bombs on the city.

He gritted his teeth together. "You killed my brothers and sisters. You all deserve to die."

Just then, another engine rattled in with extra help. A 2-8-0 rolled to a stop next to him and looked on in horror at the scene before him, the burning ruins of the shed he had once called home.

He looked at Neville. "What happened?"

"The Germans bombed the shed," Neville replied. "They're all dead, Radstock. The bastards killed every last one of them."

Radstock went white with shock. "Fowler preserve us," he said. "What are we going to do?"

Neville looked at him, his previous despair replaced by a barely contained rage. "We're going to make them pay, Radstock. We're going to make them pay. And tomorrow can't come soon enough."

Neville had a tear in his eye as he finished. "And that is why I still hate them. After all they did, how can they expect us to forgive and forget?"

Misty had sat there, listening, the whole time. And then she spoke. "Holding onto all this pain isn't healthy, Neville. I know what you went through was traumatic, but I do understand you."

"How can a human possibly know what it's like?" Neville asked.

"Because I've suffered through similar myself."

Neville looked incredulous. "Have you been through the horrors of war? Have you seen your shed bombed and your friends reduced to nothing? Have you sat in a scrapyard, unable to escape, hearing the screams of your fellow engines as greedy men ripped them apart for copper and steel? You might want to look in your drawers and ask yourself where the steel that made your cutlery came from."

Misty looked back. "I've never been in a scrapyard, but I have stared death in the face more than once. I was abused by a woman who dared to call herself my saviour. I endured verbal abuse, beatings, was sent off on dangerous missions, and was thrown from a train and left to die. I could continue to wallow in all that, and to a degree I can't escape from it. Like it or not, it happened.

"But during that time, I found Sunny and her friends. They opened their hearts to me, and accepted me as one of them with no conditions. The Havens took me in and have cared for me, helped me get back on my feet. Lady Haven even says she regards me as one of her own. By opening my heart to others, I received happiness I hadn't known in a very long time."

There was a pause before Misty continued. "It's only a passing thing, this pain. We can't let it control us. A wise woman once said that history, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage need not be lived again. Being with them caused me to realise something profound."

"What was that?" Neville asked.

"That there is some good in this world. And it's worth fighting for the dream of a better tomorrow. I intend to leave this world a better place than it was when I found it. I'm certain engines would be willing to be your friend if you extended the olive leaf to them."

Neville was silent for a moment. "Then I'll try. It may not work out, but they can't say I didn't try."

Misty nodded, and then to Neville's surprise started to sing.

"Now that I'm staring down at the darkest abyss...
I'm not sure what I want, but I don't think it's this.
As my comrades call to stand fast and forge on/
I make sail for the dawn 'til the darkness has gone!"

Neville, knowing where this was going, joined in. As did his driver.

"As the souls of the dead live for'er in my mind/
As I live all the years that they left me behind!
I'll stay on the shore but still gaze at the sea/
I remember the fallen and they think of me!
For our souls in the ocean together will be!"

Before Neville finished on his own.

"I remember the fallen and they think of me!
For our souls in the ocean together will be!"

Neville's driver stepped over. "I don't believe I got your name," she said.

"Misty," Misty replied.

"I'm Violette," the girl replied. "Nice to meet you. Maybe we could be friends?"

"The more, the merrier."

Author's Note

This chapter combines the basic plotlines of Thomas and the New Engine, an episode of the ninth series of Thomas and Friends, and Swirlpool Starlight, an episode of the second season of Tell your Tale. As the latter episode is dealing specifically with the theme of historical trauma, it in my opinion blends well with a story about not judging somebody by initial impressions. The title is taken from a sea shanty about a sailor suffering from survivor's guilt. The song is also featured in this chapter.

Faven's family history is drawn from my own-my mother nearly lost the pregnancy which resulted in my brother. Tragically, miscarriages occur in up to 20% of pregnancies, with the risk increasing depending on the age of the mother. MLP G5 had a distinctly tragic atmosphere with the sheer number of missing parents and broken families (even extending to the villains such as Allura).

Neville is a Southern Railway Q1 0-6-0, a design built in 1942. A total of 40 were produced, and their unusual design is owing to wartime restrictions; extraneous features such as running boards were emmitted, and the frames were built with all equipment on the outside to allow easy access for repairs. The result was the subject of ridicule from the railway establishment; William Stanier, the Chief Mechanical Engineer of the LMS, reportedly remarked 'where's the key' when he saw one for the first time. However, the design was incredibly powerful, producing 30,080 pounds of tractive effort, making it amongst the most powerful British 0-6-0s ever built. One, 33001, survives in preservation, and as such Neville carries this running number.

Neville's flashback takes place during one of the Baedeker Raids. In April and May 1942 the Luftwaffe initiated a bombing campaign on targets known for cultural and historical value in an effort to destroy British morale. The name comes from the fact that the Baedeker Books, a series of tourist guides aimed at Germans visiting the UK, were used to select targets owing to the books containing detailed city maps. Bath was bombed three times between 25th and 27th April 1942, resulting in many historic buildings being flattened or severely damaged.

The scene Neville comes across is based on the aftermath of the Baedeker Raid on York, which occurred the day after the Bath raid ended. York North shed was completely destroyed in the bombing, along with several locomotives. Today this is the site of the National Railway Museum, and a small memorial to the incident can be found in the Great Hall.

Misty's concluding speech is based on my visit to the Greenwood Museum in Tulsa, Oklahoma, which serves as a memorial to the victims of the Greenwood Massacre (a night of ethnic violence directed against Tulsa's Black community). In summary, although memories of the past can be painful, acknowledging them and making amends is the only way we can truly heal and move forward.

Violette Rainbow is a character originally from the G5 comics, who is a fan of Izzy Moonbow and suffered bullying owing to her unusual appearance. She also made a selection of appearances in Tell your Tale, and the fact she got a speaking role in Swirlpool Starlight implies she was going to have a prominent role going forward had TYT not been cancelled. Her inclusion here is partly at the request of Thomlight Sparkle 1.