Chapters The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Prologue: The Epic Story Of Mare
Once upon a time, in the town of Ponyville, there lived a simple earth pony named Mare. Some would say that she was the most cultured elephant in all the land. The only problem? She was so boring. Seriously. She had the most bland looking OC design ever. Honestly, it was like someone put a prompt into a pony creator website and she was born. Well...that explains a lot actually because she didn’t really have any parents. For some reason, and she did not know why they were all dead. Anyway, she lived a normal life away from society and wait, didn’t I just saying she lives in Ponyville? Oh yes I did! Screw it. I will not edit this. That's right, she led a normal life away from humanity in Ponyville and had no friends. Well, maybe one friend, but that was her stuffed Teddy Bear named Bear. And he didn’t really talk either, so she ignored him because he wasn’t real, which made him really sad and he silently vowed that he would one day overthrow his master and seize the means of production for his fellow stuffed animals.
She kept mostly to herself and had no intercourse with anyone. After all, her existence was so ordinary that she never expected that she would be destined for something much greater than herself. She fed the countryside and cut down the winter grain. I know it's such a boring job. Seriously, how much more boring can ponies get than they already are? Farming is so boring.
"I am so content with my life," exclaimed Mare happily. "There is absolutely nothing that can go wrong now!"
One fateful day, her life changed forever when a certain villain named Villain appeared out of nowhere and took over all of Ponyville! The Six Mane tried to stop her, but she was too powerful and could not be stopped. In a tragic twist, she used her intentionally unexplained OP powers to banish them all the moon. It seemed like all was lost just like that..But that was when none other than Twilight Sparkle arrived and fought Villain alone in a magical duel. The battle was fierce, and everyone watched in horror as the two Titans battled for control.
However, when Twilight was about to get the upper hand, I mean a hoof (I’m still not editing this thing, you can't make me), Villain stabbed her in the heart with a sword! Oh no! The Princess of Friendship was dead! We can't let that happen! Suddenly there was a ringing sound and Villain checked her cellphone (yes, cellphones exist in G4 Equestria now, Yay), only to see that Hasbro had called her from the great beyond. She hesitated. How could Hasbro be calling her?
She sighed and picked it up. "Yes?" "We can't have you be killing our main character," Hasbro stated through the line. "Death is an absolutely taboo subject that cannot be in any MLP story! Not even implied!! You know how sensitive kids are in today’s society. If you don't bring Twilight back, we're suing you for 10 billion dollars!!”
"Haven't you guys moved on to G5 already?" He argued wrongly. "What does it matter if I kill your old protagonist? Time doesn't matter!"
Hasbro looked into it. “Oh…yeah. That's right." Then the pride quickly returned. "Well, we still want her for marketing and likeness purposes! Bring her back or we'll file a lawsuit against you!"
She moaned softly. "Ugh, fine. I can't handle any more lawsuits."
So Twilight was revived using a Hoof-Powered Recovery Center that appeared right next to her dead body, and was banished to the moon with her friends! It didn't take long for Villain to take over Ponyville and cover the sky with a red cloud. The kingdom became an apocalyptic wasteland where all the ponies are out for themselves and coolness has literally died. She took the throne and brainwashed the rest of Equestria into following his lead.
Unfortunately for her, one pony escaped and that was Mare. Hiding far from the city, she vowed to save Equestria and rid the country of Villain's evil curse.
"I will save Equestria and all the ponies in it!" Mare declared proudly. "I don't know why I have any investment in this mission, I mean, I don't know anypony here, but who cares?! I'm the main character and this has to be done!"
So she embarked on an epic quest beyond Equestria in an attempt to find the only artifact that could defeat Villain called the Generic Macguffin. It was an ancient device that Celestia and Luna used to imprison a even eviler evil called the Even More Villainous Villain, who is Villain's great-grandmother.
Armed only with a map in her hoof, she tore through the odds and trekked through the fiercest weather. She did not suffer and would not allow herself to be deterred at all. She would see the day saved at no cost, because she was the main character of this story, and all that was all that mattered.
Her quest took her to the Temple of Arcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa(Story.exe has stopped working ), which was where the artifact was last seen. Unfortunately for her, a great pool of lava blocked his way, and she had to cross. There was no bridge nor rocks, which seemed to end the road for her at that very moment. But she was deterred. She would find the artifact no matter what and use it to defeat Villain.
So she grew wings and flew over the lava. Entering the temple, she finally found Macguffin sitting atop a table, unguarded. But just as she was about to grab it, a roar was heard, and an evil-looking snake slipped under the table. Yes, I know snakes don't roar, but this one does. Don’t ask me why, he just does. Don't question the logic of this story or else-
I am a snake," the snake introduced itself. “The snake that was sent here on behalf of all my fellow snakes to guard this Temple and the Generic Macguffin! You shall not pass!"
"I need the Generic MacGuffin to save my minions,” Mare told him boldly. “An evil villain named Villain has taken over Equestria and turned the kingdom into a wasteland.”
"Before you pass, you must answer a riddle." The snake replied calmly.
"Fine."
"All right then!!" announced the snake. "Which is 8 billion÷3,000,000,000,000÷7,000,000,000-9 divided by the square root of 79 to the power of zero÷0-80+99 all that is multiplied by 2+4+9+10+11+12+13+14+ 35+4444 +60 bazillion +2,500,000,000×1/2 multiplied by the square root of pi?"
"9!" Mare replied happily. Since she was the wisest elephant in all of Equestria, she certainly knew what the answer was. She knew everything.
"Correct!" The snake was so proud that she had answered the riddle accurately. “No one has ever managed to crack this riddle in ages! Here. Take the MacGuffin. But to be warned. With great power comes great responsibility.”
“I'm a Mary Sue,” Mare pointed out. "I don't need to be told this."
“Fair point,” the snake conceded. “After all, you did randomly grow wings out of nowhere. Whatever, just get out of my sight so I can go back to bed. I sleep on the floor.”
"Oh…" Mare commented, feeling a little bad for the guardian. "That's…actually kind of sad."
Anyway, so Mare just left the poor snake to cry alone in his misery for the rest of his life (what a cool and likeable character, am I right?), and with the Generic MacGuffin secure in her possession, she returned to Equestria and he confronted Villain in the cliché ultimate final battle for harmony.
She burst through the doors with relative ease as there was no one guarding it. It turns out that Villain didn't really have the whole "conquering Equestria" thing figured out, as she forgot to pay the annual bills for new royal guards, so the IRS got mad and took them away, leaving her with no protection whatsoever.
"Villain! Your reign of terror is over!" The horse challenged her. "I have acquired a generic MacGuffin and challenge you to a duel for the fate of Equestria! If I win, I will leave the kingdom forever.”
"How did you escape?!” Villain screeched, his fury increasing by the second. "You can not be here! I MIND-CONTROLLED EVERYPONY IN THE LAND!!!"
"It doesn't matter," Mare replied calmly. “I am here to save my fellow ponies. I'm here to avenge the Princess. And I'm here to fight for friendship.”
"You will never defeat me!"
"Taste me."
Villain was stunned by her confidence, even though she would never admit it. She would not show weakness. She was a villain and villains did what villains always did. They got the job done, and she would never let herself be defeated by a mere helpless mortal who had accidentally grown wings out of nowhere, simply due to the plot of the story demanding that of her.
And so the duel began. Both brandished their lightsabers and fought to the death. The fight between them was intense and leveled the entire castle. As the hero and villain tried to destroy each other, thunder sounded outside, and lightning struck the ground. There was no mercy to be had. Either one of them died or the other. Redemption would not be found in this darkest hour.
However, try as she might, Mare was finally overwhelmed and forced onto the ground. She had lost, and was about to be killed. Villain raised her sword in the air and prepared to slash her. Normally this is where I want it to end, right? A strong, charming villain kills the plucky protagonist. But since we can never have win the bad guy in these types of stories (seriously, when has THAT ever happened? Honestly, it’s heresy), it can't end like this...can it?
And so the cliche Deus Ex Machina moment occurred. Just when she was about to die, she remembered that she had the Generic MacGuffin in her possession the whole time. Honestly, why hasn’t she used that yet? What a dumb main character.
Anyway, once she finally realized that she had it the time, she looked up in the face of death and spat in its face. “Don't underestimate me, Villain! For I am the good witch Mare, warrior of peace!”
"Excuse me?" Villain demanded, clearly getting no reference.
"NOW EAT THIS, SUCKAAA!" Mare cried out, whipping out her claws and slamming the generic MacGuffin into his neck as hard as she could. The thistle ignited and magical energy began to sparkle. It was time for the anime-style climatic finisher, and that meant she was going to transform into a magical girl. Buy our toys!
And so a bright light enveloped her and lit up the entire room, turning her into a full on Alicorn! Magical Girl Alicorn Mare with Glow-in-the-Dark Lights Figure Coming Soon to a Hasbro Store near you. It's only $9,000!! It’s worth it, trust me- She had unlocked her full potential and nothing could take her down now.
"This is impossible!" cried Villain. "You can't be more powerful than me! I AM INEVITABLE!!!"
The horse laughed at her. "And I am Iron Man." With her alicorn power, she blew a hole through the ceiling and sent a huge Sonic Rainboom across Equestria. The explosion spreads throughout the kingdom, and everypony is immediately freed from the spell.
Villain screamed and roared as all his work was destroyed and she couldn’t do anything. The land was freed from the apocalypse, the earth is cleansed, and the orange clouds cleared to reveal a beautiful blue sky. She watched in horror as Mare conjured a large beam of magical magic intended to finish her off.
"NO!!!" cried the villain. "WHO ARE YOU TO DEFY ME?! THIS WORLD IS MY RIGHT!!!!!"
Mare doesn't waste any time and fired the blast at Villain, enveloping her into a whirlwind of pure harmonic power. Whe screamed and literally began to break into pieces. Her horn disappeared first, followed by the hind hooves. She was being disinterested into nothing, and nothing could stop it. She howled in pain as the magic burned her entire being and incinerated her slowly. She continued to scream until her face disappeared into nothingness and she was gone.
The day was saved. Celebrations broke out across Equestria as the ponies celebrated the defeat of their enemy. Twilight and her friends returned from the Moon and congratulated Mare for her bravery.
"I think I speak for all of us when I say that I want you as my personal protégé," Twilight told her kindly. "You have saved us all and you’ve earned it."
"Thanks Princess!" Mare shouted. “I promise I won't let you down. As long as we're together, it seems like nothing can go wrong again!”
“That’s the thing about looks though.” came an unfamiliar voice behind them. “They can be deceiving.”
The ponies all turned, only to see none other than Bear standing with an army of stuffed animals at the entrance to the throne room.
"Bear?!" Mare was shocked upon seeing him. "What are you doing here?! And how are you even alive? You're literally a teddy bear."
“I just am,” Bear replied smugly. “I've been alive this whole time and I've watched you neglect me for years. And guess what? I WAS THE REAL VILLAIN ALL ALONG!!!”
"Wait, WHAT?!" Pinkie Pie demanded, gasping in shock.
"Yes, you were all completely fooled!" The evil teddy bear gloated. "Villain was just a puppet I made using the powers of voodoo. She was only meant to buy me time to build an army. And now that she is no longer useful, I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU FILTHY PONYS AND HAVE JUSTICE FOR MY FELLOW STUFFED ANIMALS!!!”
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!” Mare screamed.
And so Bear proceeded to immediately massacre Mare and the Friendship Council before moving on to the rest of Equestria. He killed everypony else faster than a millisecond and sacked Canterlot. The other creatures tried to fight him, but they were all killed as well and their kingdoms were also destroyed.
Soon there was no one left in the world except Bear and his army. He then proceeded to rebuild Equestria in his image and establish a constitutional democracy where all stuffed animals and toys are equal.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 1: Welcome To The Dark Room, I’m Your New Edgelord OC
Mare awoke in a mysterious room that was pitch black, with the only light coming from a single flickering lightbulb right above her. She fluttered her eyes open, realizing at once that she was not dead anymore! How was this possible? She hadn’t remembered being dead at all, the only thing coming to mind was getting stabbed by her rampaging stuffed animal’s sword. Then…nothing. But she had unfinished business, that was for sure. Whoever had brought her back to life did so for a reason, and she was going to find out why if it was the last thing she did. She was laying on a bed that felt stiff and hard beneath her.
That was when a black male alicorn with a red mane and tail walked into the room. He had headphones on and was listening to strange pop music that she could barely detect with the power of her super hearing. Mare was intrigued. She had never seen an alicorn besides the core four princesses in her life, and she was interested to learn more about him.
“Greetings, Mare!” The alicorn greeted with the Royal Canterlot Voice. “It appears my spell that was only convenient for the plot of this story worked! You have been awoken from the dead by me, Prince Edgelord OC!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-“ He coughed upon doing the evil laugh. “On second thought, acting evil isn’t really my specialty.”
“Prince…Edgelord OC?” Mare asked in a confused tone. She sat up on the edge of the bed, ignoring the rapidly increasing headache that had just come on from her sudden movement. “I-I don’t understand. Why am I here? Last I remembered, I was in the Canterlot Throne Room. What do you want with me?”
The alicorn known as Prince Edgelord smirked. “Everything…” With a blast from his crooked horn, one of the walls of the room suddenly lit up with holographic 2D storybook animation that morphed according to what he said in any given moment. “I think you’ll find that you need me. You need me to help you undo this world you created by letting your murderous teddy bear kill all of ponykind. I’m offering you a way to undo all of this. If we work together, we can find the one artifact that can reset everything to how it was before my evil sister showed up.”
Mare peered closer at the moving figures as a single blue stone that a unicorn was holding came into view. “Which is…?”
“The Time REVERSE-INATOR!!!!!” Prince Edgelord declared proudly as the projection in front of him slowly zoomed into the stone. “Long before your time, we alicorns were the rulers of all civilization. There were thousands of us, all serving one specific cosmic function. That was until Celestia and Luna decided that they weren’t content with just ruling one part of Equestria. No. They wanted ALL OF IT. They slaughtered all of the alicorns save for Villain and I, and took control of the land. They proclaimed themselves sole rulers of the cosmos and buried any traces of us from the histories. We remained hidden…until now.”
“Wait…” Mare realized with shock. “You mentioned Villain. I defeated her using the power of my plot armor. She was…?”
“My sister.”
“Oh shit…”
“The only pony powerful enough to kill an alicorn…was you, which is why I realized that I needed your help. When Celestia murdered our kind, we hid the last hope for our revenge somewhere across time and space. We split the Time Reverse-inator into different halves so that the “princesses” could never find it. Each fragment is hidden within a different Equestria. You must traverse the multiverse to find it and get it back. With it, you can undo anything from the past and save everypony from extinction. But you must do something for me.”
“I’ll do anything to undo the damage that stupid bear caused,” Mare pleaded. “Please…name me any price, and I’ll gladly pay it. I want my friends back.”
“Then I only ask of one thing. Once the Time Reverse-inator is whole again, you must go back in time and kill the two ponies responsible for the current state of affairs in the first place.”
“Who?”
“Kill the Princesses.”
Mare gasped. “Never! I’d never agree to that! You essentially want me to undo thousands of years of history! Princess Twilight would never rule! I can’t!”
“Why not?” Prince Edgelord asked. “If it meant you could see your fellow ponies again, isn’t it worth the cost? Remember, they destroyed our kind and they weren’t even there to stop Bear from killing everyone. If they truly cared about Equestria, you’d think that they would save their former subjects.”
Mare had to concede the point. She saw his reasoning and she understood the severity of the situation. Edgelord obviously wasn’t a villain, more so a victim of circumstances beyond his control like her. But could she really bring herself to destroy the alicorns who had ruled the land fr decadez? She didn’t know, and it was a prospect daunting to her. She essentially had to travel the multiverse to do someone else’s bidding, but it wasn’t like she had any choice in the matter.
She just wished there was another way.
“Well?” Prince Edgelord prodded her, growing increasingly frustrated at her cliché indecision. “Oh come on, it isn’t even that hard. I’m not even blackmailing you.”
“If you promise that you’ll help me restore Equestria back to its former glory,” Mare finally said. “Then I’ll do it…but I don’t like it. H-how will I even find my way back here?”
“I surgically installed a tracking device in your head before you woke up,” Prince Edgelord replied calmly. “Should you deviate from the mission in any way, well, let’s just say that I haven’t had fried Earth Pony Soup in ages. Essentially, you’ll explode into a million pieces, and even if I wanted to respawn you a second time, you would essentially be unsalvageable.”
So much for the lack of blackmail in this deal, Mare thought. It wasn’t like she has any other choice, and she wanted nothing more than to return to her normal life and live the rest of her days as a boring, overpowered as heck Mary Sue who nopony cared about. Yes, she got yo be a hero, but at the cost of all ponykind. She vowed to not let death be the reason why she lost. After all, she was the smartest pony in all the land, and as horrible as this deal was, she ultimately knew that the ends justified the means, and if genocide meant she could be free of her emotional baggage, then she didn’t see why not. It was a no brainer.
“Okay!” she decided, shaking his hoof firmly. “You got yourself a deal. But I’ll be holding you to your word. You better keep your promise.”
“I’d have no reason to lie to you, my dear,” Prince Edgelord answered her with a sadistic smile. “You and I are in the exact same situation. We both want to find a way out. Now let’s get started on some multiversal hijinks. The first Rauestria you will be going to will be set in the far future, one where harmony has been replaced by unity.”
“Where am I going?”
“You must snag the first Time Reverse-inator fragment from the Crystal Brighthouse before anypony notices you. You’re going to the Misty Saga during the time of Sunny’s betrayal.”
Mare had to blink twice to make sure she was hearing correctly. “The Who saga?”
“The Misty Saga was a collection of stories written by a batpony named Hawk Nightwing,” Prince Edgelord explained. He and Mare were walking down the main hallway of the decrepit lair. “Villain and I managed to access that universe and hide the fragment of the Time Reverse-inator at some point in the timeline. But you’ll need to act fast. Kill anypony you have to if you must. But you must make off with the fragment alive.”
“But won’t Hawk be mad if you’re messing with his series?” Mare inquired worriedly. “I can’t imagine he’d be very happy with what we’re doing.”
“Oh I assure you, he can’t stop us,” the dark alicorn assured her. “You see, it’s only once a year, on April Fools Day, that crazy shenanigans like this can happen before everything must go back to normal. I offered him a nice vacation to where he’ll probably never come back from. Now we can do whatever we want because we have no author controlling us.”
Mare froze at that. “Wait…where did you send him?”
Meanwhile in an alternate dimension…
“Welcome…TO THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS!!!” Caine announced proudly. “My name is Caine. I'm your ringmaster and I'm here to show you the most jaw-dropping, heart stopping, mind-bending paraphernalia you've ever laid your eyes upon! Isn't that right, Bubble?!”
“That's right, Caine!” Bubble agreed. “I can't wait to see what you've got cooking up for today!”
“Well, let's not waste any time! Let's get right into the show!” declared Caine as he pulled back the curtains to begin the theme song.
As each of the characters, consisting of Gangle, Zooble, Kinger, Ragatha, Jax, and Pomni were introduced one by one to the audience, there was a brief flash and a batpony stallion wearing guard armor appeared out of nowhere and onto the stage. He looked around, horrified at his surroundings, as objects rushed past him.
That was when he tripped over Pomni’s foot and everyone fell into each other, abruptly ending the theme song before it could finish.
“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!” Hawk apologized upon realizing what he had done. He helped the jester girl up, who only gave him a mild glare before turning towards the others. “Are you okay, I-“ That was when he noticed the teeth eyes abomination that was Caine. “Who the f***k are you?!” It was then that he noticed that his use of the F word had been censored by a cartoonish black box.
“Now now now,” Caine admonished him. “We can't have any of that foul language around here. The Amazing Digital Circus is a place to be enjoyed by all ages. You, my friend, stumbled into an incredible world of wonders, where anything can happen!...E-except for swearing.”
“Trust me, I tried it too.” Pomni muttered under her breath.
“You what?!” Hawk asked her in shock. He then turned back towards Caine. “Listen here, Teeth Face. I need to get home to work on my next video, so can you quit your shenanigans and-“
“Gadzooks, you're right, Hawk! We should have a brand new adventure for you!” Caine interrupted him before he could finish. “This is going to be the best, most awesomest day you’ve ever had! Now…the next adventure is-“
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” Hawk screamed at the top of his lungs, forcing the others to cover their ears.
“Yep. He’s definitely abstracting next.” Jax remarked with a wink.
“Don’t worry, I’m sure he’s fine,” Prince Edgelord reassured her with a smirk. “Now, this timeline has been one that’s effectively been abandoned by Hawk. He finished the story and reset the continuity into a new universe. So because he’s no longer touching it, I’m sure he won’t mind if we make some little adjustments. Maybe trim the fat so to speak.”
“So essentially, all I gotta do is get in there, grab the fragment of the Time Reverse-inator and get out,” Mare said. “Sure…can’t be that hard, right? I mean, what are those ponies gonna do, Prince Edgelord? Kill me? I’m the main character.”
“That certainly checks out,” Prince Edgelord affirmed. “Also, from now on, you can just call me Edge. We’re friends now, and I honestly think my full name is a bit too on the nose, wouldn’t you say?”
Mare giggled. “I certainly think so. But…how will I know what the fragment looks like? There could be like a thousand different artifacts in that future timeline alone. I won’t know where to find it!”
“Trust me,” Edge replied slyly. “You’ll know. When you least expect it, the artifact will call out to you and beg you to take it back home to me. You will obey its call. OR ELSE…”
Mare rolled her eyes. “Yeah yeah yeah. I get it. Let’s just get this multiversal heist over with so I can get back home to my perfect life.”
With that, Edge blasted a portal that appeared at the end of the hallway. It pulsated with dark energy that kept Mare’s eyes transfixed and glued to it. She couldn’t take her eyes off of it as she slowly stepped toward it one hoof at a time. This was it. This was her ticket to going home, and she was not going to waste it.
“Remember…” Edge told her before she stepped through, his expression radiating authority. “Do not fail me, little pony. Or there will be consequences. Do not let those future ponies deceive you.”
“You can count on me. I don’t fail at anything.” Mare replied confidently. “I once met a guardian snake that was feeling very lonely and sorry for himself.”
“Okay…so what did you do?”
“I left him to cry alone in his misery for the rest of his life without a second thought.”
Edge was taken aback at that, staring at her with a newfound respect. “Oh. Wow. You’re very cold blooded. Well, I’m sorry for ever doubting you. You’re gonna do great.”
And with those words cheering her on, Mare stepped through the portal to a distant future. She would not be deterred. She would find all fragments of the Time Reverse-inator and save her fellow ponies because she was the main character of this story. And that was all that mattered.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 2: Mare Ruins The Misty Saga And Becomes Dirty Dan
Meanwhile, in the Misty Saga Universe…
Misty shot up in bed with a loud scream, sweat on every inch of her face. She could feel herself hyperventilating and her heart palpitating with each beat as the memory she had been trying to forget continued to play out in her mind, despite the fact that she had just woken up. She wanted to forget that night, but she never could.
The night that Opaline found her as a filly still haunted her every being. That had been the moment her life changed forever and not in a good way. She had been forced to be a slave for years, and she could never leave as she had been indebted to the alicorn over a promise that was never meant to be. The only reason she stayed in the first place was so she could earn the one thing that she thought would make her feel better about herself.
A cutie mark. The very symbol that determined a pony’s special talent had been something she had sought after for years without end, and she had done countless missions and laborious tasks in an attempt to earn it. She had always gone above and beyond the call of duty and she never gave up on her one true dream no matter how hard life got for her. No matter what Opaline had entrusted her to do, she always did as she was told in spite of the numerous conflicts she had. No matter how nice her friends treated her, she always strived to get the job done.
Alas, it had been all for nought. She had been lied to for her entire life by the pony she trusted and she would never be the same as a result. She still blamed herself for being fooled the way she was. It didn’t matter that she had been far too young to understand the concepts of manipulation, perpetual servitude, or anything of the sort. She believed that she should’ve known better than to commit all these crimes for something that she wasn’t even guaranteed to get. After all, it was because of her that Maretime Bay was now doomed beyond repair, destined to become nothing more than another tiny town under the rulership of the Fire Alicorn she once served. It was because of her that the magic was gone and the ponies hated each other once more. She had turned a blind eye when the pony suffering the most needed her.
What kind of pony was she?
As these negative thoughts overflowed like a massive tsunami through her mind, she stared at her flank and sighed deeply. By now, she knew that she was never going to get a cutie mark. And truth be told, she didn’t want one anymore. She didn’t feel like she deserved anything in life after what she had done. She felt like a terrible friend. She felt like she didn’t deserve to be happy after all the trouble she caused. Because of her, Sparky was with Opaline and he was most likely far beyond help at this point. Either he was already dead, or he was going to be soon. She knew that the alicorn would not spare him nor show him any mercy. He had what she wanted, and he was too helpless to defend himself with him being a baby dragon.
Of course, she knew deep down that it wasn’t her fault that all of this happened. It was all because of Opaline and her evil schemes that Equestria was now even more divided than it had ever been, not her. Yet…why did it feel like it was her fault? Beyond the fact that she was used to blaming and putting herself down due to experience and low self-esteem, whenever she reflected on that moment, she felt like she was to blame. She couldn’t put the Crystals back together when they shattered. She couldn’t save two of her friends from that mob attack. She couldn’t do anything right and she didn’t get it in the slightest. But one thing was undeniably clear to her and it was something that she would never shake no matter how many times she thought about it.
She had failed her friends.
You will never be forgiven. Your disgrace is worse than death. You deserve to suffer a horrible fate for what you’ve done. She sniffled and she felt the sudden rush of tears come to her eyes. With not a second to waste, she wiped them away with her hooves as fast as she could. It didn’t matter that she was alone. Crying was for cowards. She couldn’t be vulnerable. The voice in her head was certainly harsh, but it was right. She didn’t deserve to live.
After a deep and shaky breath, she slowly got down from the bed and began walking out of the bedroom. She didn’t know where she was going and a part of her told her that simply running away would be the best option for her. Nonetheless, she continued on. The others seemed to be fast asleep in their beds and none of them woke up at the sound of her hoofsteps.
She couldn’t bare to look at them. It was too painful. Despite the fact that she knew they weren’t even looking at her and were most likely lost in their own worlds, she still felt the weight of their hypothetical scorn and judgement bearing down on her. Each step she took out of the room was like balancing on knives and needles, each stab more painful than the last. She kept her head forward and headed outside and down the ramp.
Once she was downstairs, she breathed a sigh of relief. Now was her chance to leave. She would go back to Opaline and slaughter her in cold blood. She would end the nightmare herself, and rid the world of the alicorn’s dark presence once and for all. She had failed last time when she had gotten her friends involved, but she had faith that she would succeed on her own this time. She couldn’t live with the guilt on her consciousness, and she was finally going to do something about it once and for all. After that, she figured that she would strike out on her own and attempt to live the rest of her life as a lone traveler in the wilderness. She knew that wasn’t a sustainable life, but she didn’t know where else to go.
As she put on her purple cloak and prepared to walk out the doors of the Crystal Brighthouse, Misty began to hear talking coming from outside. She distinctly knew it was Izzy’s from the sound of one of the mares’ voices and she hesitated for a moment. How would Izzy, her sister of all ponies, react if she knew that she was leaving? The thought terrified her, but she knew that being indecisive was worse and could lead to her getting in trouble anyway regardless if she wanted to or not.
With a deep breath, she opened the doors and peeked her head out, only to see Izzy talking with a bland looking earth pony. They were in a bit of an argument and the strange mare was getting frustrated, but Izzy maintained a calm demeanor throughout.
“Nuh uh!” Izzy insisted. “If you want to get into the Brighthouse, you need to answer the secret password correctly! Your past 100 attempts have been incorrect.”
“Incorrect?!” The mare shouted indignantly. “You told me the answer was 7!”
“It has changed again,” Izzy replied confidently. “Now you’re gonna to do this my way, or else you’re not getting in. Zipp’s actually taught me quite a lot about managing strangers.”
“You think you can manage me?!” The mare demanded, punching Izzy to the ground with the full might of her Mary Sue-ness. “I am the main character and you’re going to let me in or else!”
Izzy recovered from her fall like it was nothing. “You’re gonna have to try a lot harder than that, silly.”
“Oh yeah?!” Mare answered angrily. “I’ll have you know, my mother trained me in Martial Arts. You’re going down!” She charged and the unicorn was down in an instant. “All right, Pinhead! Your time is up!”
“Hey, who are you calling Pinhead?!” Izzy demanded, getting to her hooves again and pouting. “I wanna be Dirty Dan!”
“What makes you think you can be Dirty Dan?!” Mare shot back in a challenging manner.
“‘Cuz I’m Dirty Dan!” Izzy replied, smacking Mare upside the head with a baseball bat. The earth pony quickly recovered and produced a mallet in her hooves. All the while, Misty watched this whole exchange with a concerned expression on her face.
“Well I say I’m Dirty Dan!” Mare yelled, landing a hit on Izzy’s head with the mallet. She smiled triumphantly before she was promptly wacked again by the baseball bat. This process repeated multiple times.
“I’m Dirty Dan!”
“I’m Dirty Dan!”
“I’m Dirty Dan!!”
“I’m Dirty Dan!”
“I’m Dirty Dan!”
“I’M DIRTY DAN!!”
“I’M DIRTY DAN!!!!”
Meanwhile, the constant ruckus from both ponies shook the entirety of Maretime Bay and reached the Sheriff’s Station, where Hitch was sleeping. As the ground constantly shook with each whack, the disillusioned former sheriff began to stir in the makeshift bed he had made for himself.
Finally, his eyes shot open.
Back near the entrance, Mare and Izzy were still fighting over who was the real Dirty Dan. Neither of them were getting any victories against the other, but the playful fight was abruptly cut short when Mare looked behind her and screamed.
Izzy giggled. “Silly Mare. Screaming will get you no-“ She couldn’t finish as a familiar tan hoof suddenly grabbed her horn and ripped it right out of its socket. Standing behind her and holding the severed, bloody horn was none other than Hitch Trailblazer himself with the angriest expression on his face. It was at moment both ponies knew they were screwed big time.
“WHICH ONE OF YOU FELLARS IS THE REAL DIRTY DAN?!!” Hitch demanded, his voice sounding like a beast with how low and growly it was. He wasn’t messing around and they knew it too well. One wrong move and they were toast. But Izzy just couldn’t help herself.
“Um…I am?” Izzy answered with an adorable smile. At that, she was promptly sent hurling into the horizon with a flick of a hoof, where she disappeared into the night sky. There was a massive explosion in the far distance, which shook the whole town, and then nothing.
Mare stood there, staring at horror at what she had just witnessed. She had to get out of here now. Whoever this stallion was, he was utterly unhinged and had just murdered that poor unicorn. And she was next. She knew this was a bad idea. But she couldn’t just turn back now. The fate of her fellow ponies depended on her.
That was when Hitch turned his attention to her. “OKAY, PINHEAD LARRY!!!! NOW YOU GET YOURS!!!!!”
Seeing no way out of her situation, Mare screamed at the top of her lungs and took off in the other direction as fast as she could. She didn’t know where she was going. All she knew was that she had to get away from this stupid place now .
“PIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNHEEEEEEEEAAAAAD!!!!!!” Hitch roared. He was after her in an instant, hungry for her blood. He didn’t care how tired he was. He was going to get them no matter the cost. He had no other goals other than vengeance. He was a carnivorous predator in the wild, only knowing how to hunt and catch.
All while she was running, Mare cursed herself for agreeing to Edge’s request. This was a horrible idea. Why had she agreed to get herself killed for this?! This wasn’t worth it. She hyperventilated as her hooves accelerated, trying to carry her as fast as it was able to. Tears of desperation filled her eyes as she sprinted through the open town square.
Hitch pursued her down the streets, knocking over abandoned grocery carts and stop signs in the process. He ran after her and saw the terrified mare disappear into a hardware store that was closed for the night. With little effort, he burst through the automatic doors, shards of glass falling in every single direction. Seeing him right behind her, Mare shrieked and disappeared behind an aisle of smartphones and chargers. He followed her, picking up the pace so as to not lose her.
In his mad pursuit, he inadvertently bumped into the shelves to his left, sending it falling towards the ground. Boxes flew all over the place and some cords that had been opened fell out and landed on the floor. Fortunately for him, he ran out of the way just as it collapsed, narrowly avoiding it. Some of the chargers caught fire and began to smolder from the electricity.
He was after her again in an instant, trailing close behind her as she burst out of the exit. He broke through the glass again just as the interior of the store exploded and lunged straight for her. She ducked and move off to the side, resulting in him in landing headfirst on the hard concrete. He groaned, wiping the fallen leaves and sticks out of his eyes. By the time he got up again, she was gone again.
After checking behind her and confirming that the mad stallion wasn’t behind her, she grabbed her cellphone and hurriedly texted Prince Edgelord, trying her best to get him to send her back to the lair.
“Edge!! Mission abort! Mission abort!!” Mare screamed desperately. “HELP!!! EDGE!!!!”
She took a couple of panicked breaths to calm herself just as Hitch emerged from another alleyway and headed straight for her.
Meanwhile back at the lair, Prince Edgelord was sitting on his favorite couch and watching the television screen. He loved watching past broadcasts of the Equestria Games and was witnessing the last annual game before the extinction event when the screen suddenly switched to the news out of nowhere.
He glanced at it in confusion as he didn’t remember changing the channel. Perhaps he just did and didn’t remember, but he could have sworn that he didn’t touch the remote.
“And now it’s back to some K.R.U.D,” the news anchor pony announced with a smile. “With all your favorite-“ That was when the screen glitched and Mare’s voice came through instead. “EDGE!!!! ABORT THE MISSION!!!! ABORT THE MISSION-hits.”
The footage then cut to Mare being brutally mauled limb by limb on the corner of an alleyway by Hitch. He was tearing into her flesh, all while she shrieked and screamed for help as loud as she could. Blood squirted out ended up on the filming camera as the stallion roared like an animal and gouged out her eyes using his hooves next.
Edgelord grabbed a bag of popcorn sitting on the table and contently ate them as the slaughtering of his new servant commenced. He couldn’t care less about her right now. For him, this was comedy gold and he was enjoying every single minute of it.
“This is fine.” he mused to himself.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 3: Revisiting Some Unpublished Fanfics Is No Big Deal (Also, Ruin Them Too While You’re At It)
Later on, Mare was revived using a Hoof-Powered Recovery Center.
As she respawned back into existence, Prince Edgelord gave her a sheepish smile. “I apologize for not intervening when you were being brutally torn limb from limb by that stallion. I know you were calling for me to help you, but you know…I was…having too much fun watching it.”
“You were watching me…ON THE TV?!” Mare demanded, exploding at him. “And you didn’t even bother to do anything about that?!”
Edgelord nodded enthusiastically. “Nope!”
Mare glared at him, taking a brief moment to collect her thoughts. “Well, I hope you’re happy, bud . Because thanks to you, I wasn’t able to get that fragment of the Time Reverse-inator from the G5 dimension.”
“Oh!” The dark alicorn realized. He waved a dismissive hoof at her. “Yeah, when I said that the fragment was in the Misty Saga universe…I lied. I just couldn’t be bothered!”
Mare was so close to snapping again at this point. It was as if he reveled in her suffering and wasn’t taking any of this seriously. “What is your problem?! You told me-“
“Well, if your quest went smoothly, then the story would be over, wouldn’t it? And we certainly can’t have that now, can we?”
“I mean, we kinda could-“
“WE CAN’T HAVE THAT NOW, CAN WE?!” Edgelord shouted, a panicked look in his eyes as he quickly looked around frantically.
“Oooooookay…” Mare said cautiously. She was beginning to be weirded out by him at this point. “Sooooo…if the fragment wasn’t in the Misty Saga universe, then…which one of Hawk’s stories does it reside in?”
“I’m glad you asked!” exclaimed Edgelord happily, springing back to his usual happy, chaotic self in an instant. “It’s not in any of his stories on Fimfiction. Rather, we’re gonna have to go back in time. Way back in time to some of his earlier work.”
“Okay…?”
“My calculations indicate that the fragment we’re looking for is hidden within another world, one that he refuses to allow the reading public to see. And you’re going to hack into that world now. Your quest shall take you to one of his craziest unpublished stories.”
“Which is?” she asked curiously.
“It has a very weird title,” Edgelord assured her. “You don’t want to know. Anyway, get in. Get out. Do not change anything or I’ll be sued for 200 vigintilion dollars.”
Mare nodded. “You can count on me.” But her eyes reflected uncertainty. “Just…promise me that you’ll actually help me this time if I get in another sticky situation, okay?”
“No promises!” Edgelord quipped with a big grin.
“Wait-“
Before she could realize what was happening, a random portal conveniently opened out of nowhere and it beckoned for her to step through it. Taking a deep breath, she did so and silently reassured herself that everything would be okay in the end.
Meanwhile, in the spin-off dimension…
Khuul smiled widely, “Holly and I have received the counterchallenge and I have turned it into a contest! The next challenge will be sword-fighting! Between Hawk and Marcus Cheng! If Hawk wins, then Clementine will belong to the Allies once again and Marcus shall be subsequently and automatically eliminated for too many failures. However, should Marcus win, then Clementine shall stay with her captors and Lee Everett shall relinquish all claims and ties to his former daughter.” Khuul shot a laser from his hands at Hawk’s head, causing him to double over in pain, a health bar appearing above his head. Same thing happened with Marcus.
“Alright, Hawk,” June said, “This is the big fight. It’s make or break time. You cannot mess this up.”
Hawk nodded, removing his spear from his armor and walking towards Marcus Cheng, who was already holding a metal sword in his hand.
The duel began at once with Marcus Cheng making an aggressive attack with his sword, which was immediately countered by Hawk’s spear.
Hawk knew the basic and advanced rules of sword-fighting. Princess Luna had taught him everything while he was training for the Lunar Republican Army.
He utilized these tactics, but soon realized 15 minutes in that it would not be enough. Marcus slashed and slashed at Hawk’s spear as he countered it. Marcus ran up fast, not giving Hawk enough time to block.
He saw Clementine struggle against her captors, wanting to help him.
He briefly caught her eyes. She looked at him in a way that kept him going. It was a look of hope, mixed with fear. She was encouraging him silently, but was also afraid he would lose.
Hawk was losing all right. Two minutes later, he was driven to his knees, Marcus Cheng preparing to stab him and deliver the fatal blow.
And that’s when he remembered. In his final moments, he remembered everything. His childhood, his training into the military, his adoption of Silverstream, the rescue mission, etc.
He recalled his first actual conversation with his future adopted daughter. Silverstream had been in slavery for 8 whole years. Clementine was going through the exact same thing and Hawk had to stop it.
As Marcus Cheng raised his sword to bring it down on Hawk’s head, Hawk sprang up and blocked the sword as it came down with his spear.
Marcus stared for a split second in complete shock, but nonetheless, continued with his attacks, Hawk countering with far more brutal ones.
Marcus was tiring out and Hawk took advantage of that. Taking a deep breath, Marcus continued to duel, but within moments, Hawk delivered a blow so hard that the metal sword flew out of Marcus’s grasp and clattered on to the floor.
Marcus’s eyes went wide with horror as he shouted: “The Lord God!! Save me!!”
Those were his last words as Hawk delivered a blow with his spear right into Marcus’s heart.
Marcus clutched his chest in pain, looking at the heavens for a moment before collapsing onto the arena ground, all the life gone out of him.
Marcus Cheng was dead.
Hawk pulled the spear out of his enemy’s chest and held it into the air. There was a pause.
And then everyone gave a standing ovation, chanting Hawk’s name.
“The Allied Powers win!!” Khuul announced, “The Internet Powers are up for elimination, which we can all agree that Marcus is automatically eliminated as I stated before.”
Film Person glared daggers at Khuul, but told his fellow haters, “Never let it be said that I’m not a man of my word. Release her.”
The person next to him grumbled, but released his hold on Clementine, who ran across the stadium arena into Lee’s arms.
Lee embraced her, everyone cheering once again.
“I’m so glad you’re alright!” Lee said.
“I’m fine, Dad,” Clem told him, letting go, “But AJ isn’t…”
Lee looked concerned. MJ and Peter turned to look at them while the other Allied forces were congratulating Hawk, oblivious to AJ’s predicament.
“What happened?” MJ asked, “Where’s your brother?”
Clementine looked away, “Marcus Cheng…he got mad at me for defying him yesterday and he…he killed AJ…It’s all my fault…”
Lee looked horrified, “No, no, no, no! AJ’s dead?”
“That’s horrible!” Fluttershy exclaimed, she and the other Allies now becoming aware of the situation.
Clementine began to cry, burying her face into Lee’s shoulder, “I could’ve saved him…But I was too scared of Marcus, so I just stood there and watched AJ collapse to the ground, Marcus continuing to beat him until……until……Film Person checked the pulse and said that AJ was dead……”
June cursed under her breath, “That fool!! Good thing he got a good whooping by Hawk! How could anyone be so cruel as to kill an 8 year old?!”
That was when Mare appeared out of nowhere, randomly spawning into existence just opposite of Hawk. She looked around in a confused manner before her eyes settled on the Allies, who were all staring at her in shock.
“Uh…greetings!” Mare said, waving to them. “I’m Mare and…I think I have the solution to your problem!”
Clementine turned to look at her, eyes still full of tears. “What…what do you mean?”
“I know a way you can get AJ back!” explained Mare, hoping desperately that she could deliver on her promise. “Don’t you guys know that Khuul’s an omnipotent god being that can do literally anything?”
“Yeah…” Lee admitted. “What are you going on about?”
“Well,” she revealed. “If he can do literally anything, why don’t you guys ask him to bring AJ back to life? He should have the power to respawn people if his object show host inspiration is anything to go by.”
Hawk turned towards Lee. “Well, I guess it’s…worth a shot, I mean…you really want to risk dealing with Clem having permanent PTSD over losing her brother for the rest of her life?”
“She was kidnapped and abused, Hawk,” Lee countered. “That’s going to happen anyway. Besides, how can we trust this…Mare thing? She just appeared out of nowhere with zero explanation whatsoever.”
“It’s worth a shot, Dad…” whispered Clementine quietly, wiping her tears. “I want him back…”
“Besides, what do we have to lose?” MJ reasoned. “It’s either we do this or…you’ve lost a very valuable opportunity.”
Finally, Lee sighed deeply. “Fine. I wouldn’t know what to do if my daughter was grieving…” He turned towards Mare, who had a cheeky expression on her face. “Alright, pony. You go tell Khuul to recover AJ. But I swear to God, if this is a trick and you’re attempting to emotionally manipulate my Clem, then it will be the last thing you ever do. Do you understand me?!”
Mare gulped. “Um…sure.” Even she wasn’t entirely sure whether this would work, but she prayed for her life that it would. Without needing any further prompting, she walked over to the paper cutout host, who was beginning to announce the next challenge.
“The next challenge will be to make your way to me!” Khuul announced. “You got 15 minutes! Last team to do so will be up for-“
“Um, excuse me?” Mare asked, interrupting him. “Sorry…Mr. Khuul. But before we begin, can you recover our dead teammate?”
Khuul turned his head quickly towards her, a furious expression momentarily on his face before it abruptly morphed into a cheerful one in an instant. “Sure thing! If you can tell me who it is!”
“It’s AJ.”
Right as she said that, there was a drumming sound and AJ materialized from Khuul’s outstretched right hand, landing on the ground. He slowly got up, looking around in fear before seemingly realizing he was no longer at Marcus Cheng’s house.
“Where…what happened?” AJ asked, his eyes soon settling on Mare. “Who are you?! Where’s Clem?!”
“AJ!” Clementine called out for him from the entrance to the arena. She was seeing him now and her eyes couldn’t believe the sight. Her little brother was back. She was grinning ear to ear, tears of sadness now replaced with that of joy. “Over here!”
“Clem?!” AJ realized, brightening at once at the voice of his sister. “Is it really you?!”
“AJ!!”
“Clementine!!”
Without needing to be told a third time, AJ bolted across the arena grounds. Clementine ran in his direction as well. Once he was near enough, she scooped him up in her arms, sobbing into his shoulder. She was overwhelmed with emotion upon realizing that the little brother she lost had been reunited with her. AJ shared in the moment as well. He wanted it to last forever and she didn’t want it to end. It was the first moment of pure happiness that she had experienced ever since they had been kidnapped. It was as if for once, all of the terrible events that had transpired throughout the past few days made sense and had led them to this moment.
Even Khuul was feeling a little emotional. “Actually…we’re gonna cancel the next challenge today in order to give these two some space! This is weirdly cliché, and I would never be this sentimental, but I don’t care as it’s an alternate universe!”
Lee walked up towards Mare in order to thank her. “Mare…words cannot describe how grateful I am for what you did. As a reward, I’d like to promote you. As from now on, you are an official member of the Allied Powers!”
Mare was so happy. She finally got to be around others again. At this point, she didn’t care about getting the fragment. She just wanted to help these guys win, and she was going to do that no matter the cost. She was the main character, and she was going to take the Internet Powers down.
Or so she thought.
Before she could blink, Mare was blipped back into the lair. The last moment she had of sweet relief had been fleeting, and she was now forced back to reality whether she liked it or not. She stopped herself from falling and stared at Edgelord with an angry expression.
He didn’t seem to understand why she was mad at him. “Don’t look at me like that. I pulled you out before you could get too comfortable in there. Now where were we?”
“I was going to eventually find the fragment in that dimension!” Mare protested. “You could’ve given me more time! I thought you want me to put back together the Time Reverse-inator.”
“I do!” Edgelord insisted, blushing a little bit. “Buuuut…I lied about that dimension too. It’s not in there either. But hey, look on the bright side! You made a little girl happy!”
“It’s not in there either…?” Mare asked. Then her confused look turned into one of pure rage. “EXCUSE ME?! YOU MEAN, I DID ALL OF THAT FOR NOTHING AND I DIDN’T HAVE TO INTERRUPT THAT GAME SHOW?!”
“Doing good deeds for others builds character!” advised Edgelord with an all-knowing grin.
“Oh, YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE BUILDS CHARACTER ?!!” Mare screamed, grabbing Edge in a chokehold by the neck and hoisting him up into the air in an attempt to strangle him.
“Wait, don’t kill me!” Edgelord begged, flailing around helplessly. “I mean, you can’t anyway, I’m immortal, but still! You need me!!”
“I’m pretty sure I don’t.”
“Alright, alright!” he finally conceded. “I’ve had my fun. I’ll send you to the real dimension this time. But be warned. This universe is full of dark and twisted secrets. There’s a reason why Hawk wanted it locked away and to never be seen by the public.”
Mare stared at him skeptically. “And what dimension could possibly be worse than the Walking Dead /WonderPark something wonky crossover I was just in?”
“Oh it’s even worse!!” Edgelord told her, his eyes lighting up with mischief. “It’s the most vile and hidden one of all. No one ever makes it out of there alive. IT’S THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF…SCHOOL REVOLUTIONS!!!!”
Mare had to blink twice in order to be sure she was hearing him properly. “School revolutions?”
Meanwhile in the Vanellope Real World TV Show universe….
It took a week for Jim to fully recover and in that time, Vanellope rode every single attraction in Wonderland and made friends with the animals.
June showed her how the park operated and even let her open the park on some days. Vanellope was amazed on how the crowds of people just appeared in some yellow magic power.
Turns out Vanellope knew how to juggle. She found that out when she was substituting for Boomer two days ago.
The other students were having the same kind of enjoyment or something similar. They took turns coming up with rides for Peanut to create.
They were all splendiferous ideas too.
But all good things had to come to an end eventually.
It all began when June summoned the SFA to a gathering near the Wondercoaster. Vanellope was very apprehensive. She didn’t know what was going to happen. The only hint she got from Gus and Cooper was that June had made up her mind about joining the rebellion or not.
Kenna was not joining the meeting. She said she wanted to head to Clockwork Swings, the heart of Wonderland.
They went towards where the rollercoaster was and June was there. When everyone was settled, June said: “Members of the SFA, I thank you for the wonderful things that you have done for Wonderland. It seems you are not the terrorists I presumed you to be. As a show of me and the animals’ gratitude, there is one small thing we could do for you…”
Everyone held their breath.
Just then, alarms went off in the distance.
BEEP!! BEEP!! BEEP!! BEEP!! BEEP!! BEEP!!
Everyone gasped.
Vanellope looked towards the sound. It was coming from Clockwork Swings.
“Anna!” Vanellope said, “Clockwork Swings, it’s-“
“Come on!” Anna called to her.
June and the animals were already heading over there.
When they reached it, they saw Kenna tearing down Clockwork Swings, ripping off the gears.
June looked horrified, then furious. She ran up to Kenna and knocked her to the ground in rage.
“Ow!” Kenna yelped as she hit the ground.
“All of this so you can sneak away and destroy the park?!” June roared. She yanked Vanellope off her feet. “This is why I didn’t trust you rebels to begin with!!”
Vanellope fell to the ground with a thud, getting up.
The animals all looked angry at the SFA.
“Please, June-“ Vanellope tried, but she knew it was too late.
June stared at every student gathered, her face full of anger as she held Peanut’s magic pen. In a tone that chilled Vanellope to the core, she said: “You don’t deserve to be one of us.”
Right as she was about to exile them though was when Mare appeared out of thin air. This time, she knew what to do. Quick as a flash, she ran up and snatched the pen from June’s hand.
“Hey! Give it back!” June cried. “That’s Peanut’s marker!”
“Sorry!” Mare apologized quickly. “Uh, I need this to restore my world. I promise I’ll give it back to you once I’m done with it, June!”
“But how can I-“
“That’s for you to figure out! Bye!” And in a flash of light, Mare was gone with the pen in hoof. She had disappeared and there was no way for the animals to find her.
Vanellope looked at the shellshocked June with a nervous grin on her face, even as the other girl was so close to snapping. “Sooooo…I guess you’re stuck with us then?”
Mare reappeared in the lair with the pen in her hoof. She dropped it, panting from the exhaustion of her trip across the cosmos. Fortunately for her, Edge picked it up and admired it. She prayed that this was the right artifact, otherwise she wouldn’t know what to do.
Edgelord held the pen in the air with his magic, staring at it with eager anticipation. “It’s been so many moons since I’ve seen a piece of my Time Reverse-inator. How beautiful it is! What was Hawk thinking, giving it to a lowlife 12 year old girl with mommy issues?”
“I’m…pretty sure that wasn’t his decision,” Mare reasoned. “It was Paramount’s when they made Wonder Park back in 2019.”
“Well,” Edgelord declared. “It doesn’t matter. Once I have the whole set, I’ll see to it that the show Hawk left behind is completed and that all of his incompleted stories are given a proper ending.” He stared up into the sky longingly. “He will thank me for this.”
“I’m sure he will,” agreed Mare. “Now…where do I go next?”
“Glad you asked!” he replied instantly. “Your next adventure shall take you to the world of Hawk’s fanmade Moana 2. Don’t ask me why he made it. I don’t know either.”
Meanwhile in the unofficial Moana 2 universe…
Moana and Amy were hanging out on the school campus on a bench. School was over for the day and she wanted to get to know more the girl who she had saved.
“I never really thanked you enough…” Amy said softly, “For…sticking up for me back there. Everyone else just turns a blind eye because I’m just the weird little girl…”
“Weird?” Moana asked, “Why would they think that?”
“It’s because when I was two…” Amy pushed some of her black hair back, showing a scar. Moana gasped. Amy continued, “…I had a brain surgery because of a bad tumor in my brain that was dangerous for my wellbeing. As a result of the surgery, there’s a permanent damage on my brain. I can’t concentrate well in school as a result of attention problems. It renders me unable to learn well…Richard and Pete, being the top dogs in Mr. Larry’s class, always bullied me because of it…They always told me I would never amount to anything because I’m just too dumb. Sometimes, I feel that they were right…”
Moana felt really bad for her, “Oh Amy, it’s not your fault that you can’t do well in school. It was the surgery. Don’t blame yourself for something you can’t control. It’s not your fault.”
“…It’s not?” Amy asked.
Moana shook her head, “I don’t know much, if anything, about the modern technology of Western civilization, but I do know that it’s not your fault that you have a learning defect. Just believe in yourself, okay?”
Amy nodded and the two smiled at one another.
Suddenly, there was a blasting sound and a blaster bolt came shooting out of a cloud and at the school, causing an explosion.
Moana was shocked. She waited. Suddenly, about 20 Star Destroyers came out of hyperspace at lightning speed and started blasting at the school.
“Star Destroyers!” Amy squeaked, “They found us!”
“But-but how?” Moana asked, “I thought the location was secure.” But Amy was already up and trying to pull her up.
“We need to get the professors!” Amy told her, “Fast!”
They ran into the building where they found Shang talking with Mulan in Mrs. Ridley’s history classroom.
“Shang! Mulan! We’re under attack!” Moana shouted.
“What?” Shang inquired. He looked at Mulan, “Get our other recruits now. I think it’s time we test them. Also, get the equipment from the camp.”
Mulan nodded, sprinting off into the hallway.
Another blast shook the building and the three of them ran towards the exit.
“How did this happen?!” Shang demanded while running.
“I don’t know,” Moana admitted, “But I feel…” Suddenly, she got a headache and heard something beeping inside of her. That was when she realized the horrible truth, “Oh no. They instilled a tracker in my head so they’d know my location.”
Shang stopped, “What?! Oh for the Emperor’s sake, no one was safe with you! The Fandom Menace has been watching us this whole time BECAUSE OF YOU!!”
“It’s not her fault, Mr. Shang…” Amy tried pleading on behalf of her newfound friend, but backed down after a death glare.
When they got out to the exit, they saw all students and staff assembled outside. They were trying to shoot cannonballs out of tanks at the Star Destroyers, which had increased to 50.
Elsa shot a blast of ice at the iron underbelly cannons of the nearest Destroyer, which froze it temporarily. But it was short-lived as the ice started heating up and then a blast blasted through it.
“We need more cannonballs!” said Aurora.
“How are we going to take all 50 of them?” Belle asked him.
Shang was at a loss. Luckily, Mulan knew what to do, “Everyone, keep shooting! These tanks are designed to fire many cannonballs at a time. Fire like mad and aim for the cannons! You too, Moana!”
Moana found three unmanned tanks and motioned for Shang and Amy to get in them.
The defenders fired like mad at the Star Destroyers. The combined might managed to knock out two, which exploded and fell towards the ground. But there were still 48 left.
“There’s still too many!” Amanda, the girl from training earlier, cried out.
Moana had to make a decision fast. She saw some TIE fighters emerge out of hyperspace, adding to the offensive, and finally came up with a plan.
She got out of the tank.
“Moana, what are you doing?” Mulan asked her, “This is insane!!”
“I need a paddle,” Moana told her, “Have any?”
“You mean the one Mrs. Coldheart uses to discipline the preschoolers?” Shang asked, getting out a brown oar paddle, “It’s right here. I confiscated it from her yesterday and reported her actions to Principal Larson. She’s under investigation by Disney now.”
“That’ll work. Thanks, Mr. Shang.” Moana took the paddle and concentrated. She flicked the paddle up and a torrent of water came spraying up from the ground in front of her. She was surprised, but kept going. She spun the paddle around, generating more water, and directed it right at the windows of the Star Destroyers.
“Come on! We gotta help!” Jasmine told the others. They started firing the cannonballs at the Destroyers again, putting the FM on the defensive now.
As it tried blasting every which way, the main Star Destroyer’s reckless blasting hit another Star Destroyer, which hit another. Soon, all the Destroyers had smashed into each other and made quick work of the small TIE fighters, which either got smashed, or were blasted out of the sky. The combined lump exploded into a bright blast of energy and they fell towards the ground in one big smoking heap, littering the campus grounds.
Moana called off the water attack by setting her paddle down.
However, right as she thought she was done, several more Star Destroyers and TIE Fighters emerged out of hyperspace and began raining fire on them. The students scattered, hiding underneath any defenses they could find and shooting arrows at the attacking ships. One of them managed to land a hit, but it wasn’t enough to shoot it down.
Elsa then shot her ice powers at a TIE fighter again and it froze it long enough for Shang to spear the frozen window. The hit landed clean and the starship fell to the ground below, exploding. But even as they had small victories, it was not enough to take down the entire fleet. The Destroyers were just far too numerous and taking them all down would be impossible.
As they all prepared to collectively fire, Moana ran towards sprinting a blonde girl and shielded her with her body, preparing to take the blow for her newfound classmates. She squeezed her eyes shut, bracing for the painful release of death. But she felt nothing. No hit and no heat from an explosion. It was as if the ships had suddenly stopped firing. Opening her eyes, she soon found out why.
The guns were now pointed at the air instead of the ground, with the entire fleet seemingly concentrated on a new target. Moana stared at this peculiar sight, confused, and turned towards a recovering Shang.
“Mr. Shang, what are they firing at?” she asked hurriedly.
Shang looked just as shocked as she was. “Something just entered the upper atmosphere!”
All the students looked up to see what was going on. As if on cue, the sky was suddenly lit up with what seemed like a falling meteor. But this was no ordinary asteroid. It was a green pony with wings and a horn flying straight towards the nearest Star Destroyer. She flew straight through it, causing it to implode from the inside, and she emerged from below. From the ground, everyone cheered on their mysterious savior as she pummeled through more of the ships and sent them careening straight towards the ground below.
The pony was none other than Mare, who had assumed her alicorn form, and was taking down each of the attacking starships with simple punches. Her forehead was full of sweat as she did so, but she stopped at nothing to save the day. Her horn lit up with a powerful pink aura and she blasted a huge beam at four approaching TIE fighters. They instantly burst into flames, heading towards the campus in a pile of flaming debris.
“Oh YEAH!!!” Mulan exclaimed, throwing her hands into the air in celebration.
“PRAISE MICKEY MOUSE!!!” Amanda cheered, interpreting this as a sign from the heavens that fate was on their side.
Mare looked like a ball of magical energy from below as she blasted through several more Destroyers and fighters. The crafts were destroyed in an instant. And in that moment, she understood the true power of a Mary Sue. She had no flaws. She had no weaknesses. When it came down to it, she was capable of anything.
In almost no time at all, the fleet was completely wiped out and she returned to the ground. She stared at the stunned students and Disney characters below her, who were all staring at her with a mix of awe and admiration.
“Um…hi?” Mare greeted them awkwardly.
The students began to cheer softly. Then, the intensity of the cheers increased until it was a full on standing ovation. Despite their injuries, everyone threw their swords and spears up with their hands in celebration. The applause resonated throughout the area and beyond the forest. It was said that the entirety of Pangaea could hear the cheers of the students of YouTube School, for they had won their first battle for freedom in battle.
As Mare saw everyone cheering, tears of pride came to her eyes. She had saved these students,. She had rescued them all. They had just accomplished feats they didn’t even know they could do. They had faced the enemy and sent them packing. Joining in, she shouted at the top of her lungs:
“FOR LIFE!!!!”
The roar of the crowd continued, intensifying with each word she spoke.
“LIBERTY!!!!”
More applause.
“FOR THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS!!!”
Three slogans not uttered in hundreds of years. The thunderous applause continued, reaching up to the skies and beyond the stars. As the cheers gradually died down, one thing was definitely for certain. This was their mission now.
Freedom.
The celebrations lasted long into the night and in that time, Mare was awarded with all the prizes she could ever ask for. She had friends, she had love…she had a perfect life. She and that girl named Moana began talking with one another and learning about each other’s respective worlds. Mare had everything she could have ever wanted.
But of course, it couldn’t last this good forever. She had a mission to take care of, and an Equestria to save. She wasn’t about to be distracted again. For she was the main character of this story and she was going to see this mission through no matter what. So she headed outside and searched for the most effective way inside that wouldn’t disturb any of the other students. She knew that knocking on the door would arose suspicion. Her best attempt was silently climbing through an open window and evading suspicion.
She climbed the walls of the school and upon reaching the window to the dorms, she found it miraculously unlocked. The windows were usually open to let air in while they slept, so that provided the perfect cover for her to get in.
But right as she was about to reach the window, her hooves began to slip and she grabbed on to the nearest ledge for dear life, gritting her teeth as she hoisted herself up and onto the window. It was there where she gently crept inside. She didn’t know whether Moana’s paddle would be in the room, but thankfully, it was.
The paddle was resting on the nightstand beside where Moana was sleeping. The poor girl looked too adorable while asleep, laying right next to a plush of Maui, and holding it close to her. Mare fought the urge to leave and slowly tiptoed over to where the paddle was. Without any hesitation, she picked it up in her hooves.
Mare sighed, feeling a monetary pang of self-doubt. “Hmm, am I really going to betray my new friend for my own self interests?” She immediately knew what the answer was, however. There was only one, and she was not about to have one of those cliché morality conflict moments present in a lot of stories. She knew what she needed to do and she grinned from ear to ear. “Of course I am!”
What a cool and likeable character, am I right?
And so, she took the paddle and jumped back through the window, towards her salvation, and away from the school that she had just saved.
Mare reappeared back in the lair again, falling to the floor, as she floated the paddle over to Edgelord, who picked it up and grinned with pride. She was exhausted, and she just wanted to rest after a long day of universe hopping. She knew full well that it wasn’t going to happen though.
Edgelord seemed to think the same way as well as he put the paddle and pen together and they fused into one mechanical device. “At last! Everything is going exactly the way I have foreseen…AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!”
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 4: From One April Fools Character To Another
Mare respawned inside of Hitch’s sheriff station. She looked around to see where she was, realizing at once that she was back in the world of G5. Only…something seemed a little off this time, and she didn’t know what it was. That was until she saw an unfamiliar figure sitting in the office seat. It was a red stallion with a yellow mane and tail. There was a level of arrogance about him, and she could tell that just by looking at his face. Sprout Cloverleaf.
Sprout sat on his throne inside the ruins of Hitch’s sheriff office, striking the head of his mother Phyllis sinisterly and smiling to himself. He had done it. He had won and now Maretime Bay was his once again.
On the news in front of him, the TV reporters were talking about the destruction of Bridlewood and Zephyr Heights and how the casualties were enormous. Equestria was now in a state of fear and panic once again and those who survived the attack blamed the other races.
Sprout was satisfied now that everything was now back the way that he felt it should be. No more unity and equality.
Only hatred and fear remained.
As the demonic despot set his mother’s head down and took a sip out of a chocolate-flavored smoothie, he suddenly noticed Mare standing there in front of him, smiling sheepishly. Reluctantly, he stood up from his makeshift throne and slowly walked over towards her.
“You DARE trespass upon my domain !” Sprout said calmly, pointing a hoof at her. “The domain of Emperor Sprout! WHO ARE YOU ?!”
Despite her fear, Mare still remained strong. She had no fear, and she was going to see this to the end no matter what. For she was the main character of this story and-
she wasn’t about to be deterred from her mission whatsoever.
“I’ve come to retrieve your mother’s severed head,” Mare explained in a chill manner. “I need it to restore my own timeline. I come from a barren version of your Equestria…and I need your help to bring it back to life.”
Sprout still didn’t seem convinced. “Why should I give you my mommy’s head?! It’s my most prized possession !”
“Because my timeline is gone,” she replied solemnly. “From one April Fools character to another, I’m asking for your help. I’m sure you’ll find it much more preferable to work with Prince Edgelord and I, rather than ruling all by yourself.”
“I’ll have you know that I quite prefer ruling on my own ,” Sprout spat at her. “No more bossy bot Hitch to tell me what to do. I’m independent now, and I’m doing this my way !”
Mare smirked. “Yes, but what if I told you that if you helped me, you could have more than just simply Equestria at your disposal?”
This peaked Sprout’s interest, his insatiable desire for conquest coming to the surface. Suddenly, he found himself intrigued despite his reservations. “Hmmm…more than just Equestria ?”
“Yes,” Mare confirmed, knowing full well that she had the earth pony right where she wanted him. “You see, Edge and I hold the key to unlocking many different worlds throughout the Admiral Producer multiverse. If you help us…you could rule them all. You could rule everything .”
Sprout was listening intently now, more so than he knew he probably should. The prospect of controlling all life and will throughout the multiverse was tempting, and he didn’t feel right passing it up. No matter if this was a trick or not, he could not turn away this mare’s offer.
And all he had to do was give away one thing. If Mare and her ally won, then he would in turn as well. He would finally show Hitch that he was a stronger and more powerful sheriff than he ever was.
“Well?” Mare prodded him with a tilt of her head. She had to admit that she had memorized this evil villain facade perfectly.
Finally, Sprout capitulated. “Oh alright! Losing the last memory of my mommy is a small price to pay for multiverse domination .” He walked over towards his throne and held up the decapitated head of Phyllis Cloverleaf, hoofing it over to his new partner in crime. “Take it .”
“You’ve made a wise decision, Mr. Cloverleaf,” Mare congratulated him, shaking her hoof with his. “You won’t regret it. We’ll pick you up when this is all done.”
“I cannot wait !” Sprout replied, practically jumping up and down with glee. “That’ll show Hitch that I’m not weak and pathetic like he was !!”
In a flash of light, Mare disappeared from sight. She had gone with the head, the only traces of her existence being a piece of hair that had dropped on the floor.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 5: Mare Becomes A Jedi And Solves All Of Silverstream’s Problems Because Of Course She Does
Meanwhile, in the Trials of the Force universe…
What do you mean she’s gone?!” Silverstream demanded in shock. She climbed out of bed quickly and grabbed her lightsaber in the event that something terrible had happened. “Anakin, explain to me what happened!!”
Anakin stood in front of her, his face looking grim. “The officers at the Prison were assaulted…according to what the Temple guards told me, Katooni helped Petro escape. They’re running away together…”
Silverstream’s mouth dropped open in horror once she heard this. She could feel her heart sink to the bottom of the ocean and her thoughts began to spiral out of control. This couldn’t’ve happened. Why?! Why would Katooni choose to do this?! What good would it do her?! She only hoped that the both of them were still on Coruscant somewhere, anywhere where they could be found.
“We need to hurry!” she said worriedly. “M-maybe they’re still here somewhere!”
Anakin nodded quickly. “There might still be hope. But we don’t have much time. Come on!”
The two of them ran outside as fast as they could and burst through the exit to the Jedi Temple, lightsabers at the ready. They skidded to a halt once they saw a starship in the distance take off into the nighttime sky. Silverstream couldn’t believe her eyes. She knew who it belonged to and tears began to fill her eyes. She was too late.
Petro had already taken off with Katooni and there was no way that either of them could be stopped now. The world began to crumble before Silver’s eyes. Her worst fears had been realized. She had lost her Padawan, all because she didn’t listen to her. And now she was paying the price for her actions. She had driven away the only person who truly understood her, and now she would never get her back.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!” she screamed, falling to her knees. The horrible reality had finally set in and she began to cry, feeling all of the emotions she had been internalizing finally overwhelm and consume her. She couldn’t say anything to make the situation better. This was her fault, she just knew it. There was no other way to look at the situation. All of this had been started because of her presence here.
Why couldn’t she have just kept her damn mouth shut?
Anakin was instantly by her side, trying to console her to no avail. It wasn’t long before the other Jedi Council members heard the commotion and rushed outside to see what was the matter. But she didn’t see them come. She couldn’t stop sobbing. All of this was because of her, and she knew it. She could’ve prevented this. She should’ve prevented this. She should’ve listened to Katooni’s feelings and told her that she understood her heartbreak over Petro’s betrayal. None of this had to happen. She could’ve been a better friend.
Before long, the starship disappeared into hyperspace and was completely gone from sight. Silverstream hung her head low and stared at the ground, feeling like a failure.
“What do we do now, Master Yoda?” Anakin asked, turning towards the wise Grandmaster while still having his hand on Silverstream’s shoulder.
Master Yoda looked somber, his expression almost mournful in a way as he stared up into the sky that was slowly turning blue with the rising of the Sun.
“Lost to the Force, Padawan Katooni is,” he stated sadly. “Help her now, we cannot…”
“Maybe we can!” Mare exclaimed as she suddenly appeared out of nowhere, startling all Jedi present. “Hello! Uh, my name is Mare! I’m your convenient Deus Ex Machina solution and I’m here to help!”
Silverstream turned her head to look at her. She seemed surprised at the sight of someone from her world at the Jedi Temple.
“What are you…doing here?” she asked. “I thought I’m the only creature from Equestria the Force sent. What do you mean by help?”
“What I mean by that is that I’m here to encourage you to keep going, Silverstream,” Mare explained, walking towards her. “You can’t give up on Katooni just like that. She needs you, and you need her. You can still save her. It’s not over yet.”
Silverstream stared back at her, not saying anything and silently absorbing the information she was being told. She wanted nothing more to save her Padawan, but she didn’t know how, especially now that Petro’s starship was already so far away.
“Be so sure, how can you, hm?” Master Yoda asked her skeptically.
“Because you guys are Jedi!” exclaimed Mare. “You’re awesome! You won the Clone Wars, you exposed the Sith infiltration…you can do anything you set your minds to! When push comes to shove, you’re the toughest force in the whole galaxy!”
“That is true…” Anakin admitted with a knowing smile.
“Silverstream, you even brought Anakin back to the light!” Mare continued. “You saved him and changed the course of history! If anyone can save Katooni, it’s you! You can’t give up on her…you know she never did for you.”
“You’re right,” Silverstream answered, smiling a little. “She never did give up on me, did she?”
“No, she didn’t.” Anakin agreed, smiling back. “And she was always there for you, even when we weren’t able to be. She would absolutely do the same for you.”
“Then what’s stopping you?!” Mare encouraged them. “Rally the Senate! Send out the fleets! Grab the clones! Go mad!! Fight like hell…the way you always do! After all…it’s the life of one of your own at stake. Katooni is a Jedi, and Jedi look out for one another.”
“We certainly do!!” Anakin declared. “Master Yoda, we cannot let Petro make off with Katooni like that. We have to rescue her no matter what!”
To his utter surprise, Master Yoda actually nodded. “Drawn to the Force, all Jedi are. Save our Padawans, we must. Abandon them again, we will not.”
Silverstream heard this and stared back at him in shock. She never thought he would agree to this, and she found herself seeing the wise old Grandmaster with a newfound respect.
“Thank you, Master…” she whispered.
Master Yoda gave her a nod of humble acknowledgment, a warm smile forming on his face. “Right, you were all along, young Silverstream. Save those we love, we must.”
“Then what are we waiting for?!” Mare rallied them with a massive grin on her face. “Let’s get this done!!”
It took all day to call in a meeting with Supreme Chancellor Amidala the following morning, who was on Naboo, but as soon as she arrived and Silverstream gave her the context, she immediately agreed to lend the Jedi the entire Republic fleet to prepare an assault on Nantoka to rescue Katooni.
Mare helped organize the fleet in different squadrons while Anakin and Obi Wan worked on fixing whatever ships needed to be fixed. As soon as all starships were ready for battle, Silverstream, now a Jedi General for the time being, gave the order for all ships to launch.
The Republic fleet emerged out of hyperspace above the planet of Nantoka, all the ships, cruisers, freighters, and capital ships. Anakin and Ahsoka were each in Naboo freighters, keeping every ship in formation. Silverstream was ahead of all of them, her heart beating at a fast rate as her mind worried about Katooni.
Don’t worry, I’m coming. She thought.
“This is General Silverstream,” Silverstream called, “All ships, do you copy?”
“We’re right here, Silverstream,” called Commander Rex, piloting an X-Wing, “We’re waiting on any enemy crafts Petro might have at his disposal. Are you spotting anything?”
“Not yet,” Silverstream replied, “I don’t know if Petro knows that we’re here yet. I’m heading into the planet to rescue Katooni. You all keep on a lookout for rogue Separatist ships.”
“There appear to be a number of small fighter crafts heading our way,” Mare said, “Raise the shields!”
At first there was nothing. Then, a bunch of Separatist Star Destroyers appeared in front of them out of hyperspace in the opposite direction and started firing at the Republic Star Destroyers and other ships, followed by TIE fighters.
“Fire!” Silverstream ordered, “Activate the laser cannons! Start the attack route and provide a distraction while I head in!”
“Roger that,” Anakin said, “You heard her. Leave not one Separatist standing! Take no prisoners! KILL THEM ALL!!!!!!”
The attack began as the Republic ships engaged in conflict with the Separatist ships, firing their laser cannons at the enemy as ships were blasted and others flew around, creating the distraction. The Republic Star Destroyers blasted at the underbelly cannons of the Separatist Star Destroyers and the X-Wings and Y-Wings took on the TIE fighters.
Silverstream piloted the Atlantis 5 into the Nantokan atmosphere at top speed, soaring above the towns and cities until she got a visual on Petro heading into a luxurious gold mansion. Silver realized that Katooni must’ve been held captive in there. Petro gave no indication that he saw her starship.
She landed and walked out of her ship, blue lightsaber drawn and activated, towards the mansion.
Meanwhile, Katooni was working on cutting overgrown weeds out in the backyard in the hot sun. She had been released from her restraints that morning, but Petro put shackles around her ankles before she went out to the yard to be sure she wouldn’t try to escape.
It’s not like she would try to. She had already accepted her fate by this point and saw no use in trying to resist Petro. She would obey him and let him torture her. After all, she figured, it was better than him being locked up in Galactic Prison and her not being allowed to visit him.
She was also wearing a slave collar, which would shock her with electricity if she tried to leave the area.
As she continued to cut the weeds, she saw a white aircraft fly by, followed by a Separatist Star Destroyer falling out of the sky in a smoking wreckage. She knew this could only mean one thing. A battle was raging above the planet. She guessed that it was Silverstream and the other Jedi and her spirits rose.
Inside the mansion, near the door, Silverstream and Petro were facing off. None were making a move against the other, but Petro stood there calmly as Silver glared at him.
“You kidnapped my Padawan, the girl who I love as my own daughter,” Silverstream told him, “You’ve tortured her and enslaved her. I have to stop you.”
“Must you?” Petro asked, “Honestly Silverstream, this could’ve all been avoided if you chose me instead of her. One day, I’ll let her go. But she will never be the same again. You’ll never be able to train her. Perhaps I can release her sooner though. Just accept me as your Padawan and I’ll let her go. If you refuse…well, I have the remote controlling her shock collar right now. Refuse and I’ll have it electrocute her to death. Do you want that? Do you want to see your precious little apprentice die, Silver?”
Silverstream had enough. In a blind rage, she lunged at him with her lightsaber, Petro countering it with his two lightsabers.
The lightsabers clashed and the epic duel began. Silverstream swung at Petro, who countered it with a cross shield of his two lightsabers. He then swung his green lightsaber at Silverstream’s head, but she blocked it with a shield 5.
Petro was getting enraged now. He hastily swung both lightsabers, but Silverstream was able to block both one and the other in record speed. Silverstream did a flip and appeared behind him. Petro swung around and blocked Silver’s incoming strike. He lunged forward, but Silverstream grabbed him using the Force. He did the same and both were summersaulted in opposite directions, crashing into furniture.
“You can’t win, Petro!” Silverstream shouted, springing back up.
“THIS IS MY GALAXY!! MY DESTINY !!!” Petro yelled back, lunging at her and doing a summersault in the air. Silverstream was ready. With lightning speed and deadly accuracy, she blocked his strike and countered it with her own. Her strike managed to disarm him literally. Petro screamed in pain as his left hand was severed off and his green lightsaber went clattering to the floor.
“Surrender, Petro!” Silverstream told her, “You are no match for the Jedi Order and the Republic! Release Katooni!”
“NEVER!!!” Petro roared, “MY TERMS OR NOTHING!!” He used his right hand to summon the Force, trying to Force-choke Silverstream, but she was prepared for it. As he tried to concentrate his anger, Silverstream did a backflip, whipped behind him and struck. Petro spun around and quickly blocked it, but his accuracy was now flimsy thanks to having one hand removed. Immediately, Silverstream did another strike and the duel continued.
The duel continued into the family room, then the living room, and finally into the backyard.
Katooni was witnessing the effects of the space battle. Some X-Wings were blasted out of the sky, as well as some TIE fighters. She had forgotten all about her yard work by this point as her mind lingered on what was going to happen.
All of a sudden, the doors fell over and Silverstream and Petro came out, engaged in a lightsaber duel to the death.
“Master!” Katooni called out.
Silverstream briefly glanced at her and that was when Petro struck her, severing one of her wings off. Silverstream cried out in pain and agony. Petro then used the Force to push Silverstream into a planter, knocking her out upon impact.
“No!!” Katooni screamed, thinking her master was dead.
Petro smiled, “Looks like Silverstream isn’t a good fit for you after all. She lost TO ME!!”
Katooni began to cry, her tears showing her anguish and despair. Petro then got on top of her, pinning her face down to the ground. He began to beat her repeatedly. She cried out for help, trying to fight Petro off, but he was too strong. She kept sobbing as Petro beat her over and over.
Meanwhile, Silverstream lay on the ground, all the energy gone out of her. She could feel her weak breathing and she knew death was near. She saw ships being blasted out of space and saw Petro beating Katooni up as she cried and sobbed. This was it. She had lost. She would never rescue Katooni. The poor girl would grow up as a slave to her former friend without any hope. Everything was lost. However, just as she was about to take her final breaths, she heard a voice in her head.
Silverstream.
It was Anakin reaching out to her from space using the Force. He said, You’re stronger than this, Silverstream. You can’t let him beat you. Feel the Force flowing through you. I know you have what it takes to win.
But what if I can’t beat him? Silverstream thought back, I feel so lost.
You have everything you need. Show Petro the true strength of a Jedi. A Jedi has no fear. Obi Wan told me that all the time and still does. Remember, you have everything you need. You have the Force. And you are MY Padawan. Rise, Silverstream!
Silverstream felt strength flow through her. She gripped the ground and rose as Anakin’s encouraging words flowed through her mind, I stand behind you, Silverstream. Think of Katooni. You must rescue her. Save her. The Force will be with you. Always.
Using the Force, Silverstream summoned her lightsaber and stood up, the Force flowing through her. Opening her eyes, she felt empowered. She was one with the Force and the Force was with her.
Petro stopped his rampage. He turned, surprised and shocked.
Katooni slowly got off the floor, wincing from the pain she experienced while being punched and tortured. She stood up weakly and was also surprised by Silverstream.
“Get away from my Padawan!” Silverstream shouted, the voices of a thousand past Jedi echoing her words as she spoke.
“IMPOSSIBLE!! HOW COULD YOU REACH THAT LEVEL OF BALANCE WHEN NO OTHER JEDI COULD NOT?!” Petro demanded.
The Force projection of Anakin appeared in front of him, “Because she’s my Padawan.”
In the midst of the Battle of Nantoka, Anakin Skywalker had sensed his second Padawan’s distress and reached out to her using the Force. But as he spoke to her through his mind, it was draining him. The last straw for his life essence came when he Force projected himself onto the battlefield. He had stopped his starship amongst the fighting in a safe area away from the chaos.
He then felt his Force projection get blasted by Force lightning and his concentration broke. He collapsed in his starship, all the energy gone out of him.
As Petro fired Force lightning at Silver, Katooni watched in fear, not knowing who was going to win.
“You are no match for the power of the dark side!” Petro yelled, “I will always have more power than you!! I AM YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE !!!!!!!!!”
Silverstream focused on the strength within her. She had to give it all she had. For Katooni. For the Jedi. For the Republic. She glared at him, “And I am Silverstream,” She summoned Petro’s green lightsaber from inside the mansion and shouted, “APPRENTICE TO ANAKIN SKYWALKER!!!” Quick as a flash, she formed the lightsabers into an X shape and began deflecting the lightning back at him, the strength of the Living Force flowing through her. She was a Jedi. She was Anakin’s Padawan. She was the last hope for the Republic and the Jedi Order now.
Katooni cheered her on, “Go, Master! You got this!!”
Encouraged by her words, Silverstream stepped closer and closer, pushing the lightning back at Petro, who couldn’t believe what was happening. The lightning began hitting him. Silverstream unleashed another push and the lightning electrocuted Petro, melting his face off as he screamed, “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!”
With a final push, Silver deflected the last of the lightning back at Petro, causing a massive white explosion that sent the loose lightning flashing through the backyard, destroying the planters and chains that bound Katooni. The lightning hit the mansion, causing fires to happen inside before it was obliterated with a massive explosion of fire and light.
The fight was over.
One week later…
Mare stood in the middle of the circular room of the Hall of Knighthood, surrounded by many Jedi Masters, each with their lightsabers held high in the air. Master Yoda stood on a floating pod, looking directly at her. She couldn’t believe this. In one week after saving the day, she had managed to bypass the youngling stage of Jedi training and the Padawan stage, and now she was going to be knighted just for saving the day. She didn’t even need to do much. Not even Silverstream had gotten that honor at her ceremony.
Being a Mary Sue certainly came with its perks.
Now Mare was standing before all the high-ranking Masters of the Jedi High Council. Several Padawans were scheduled to go after her and she had been selected first. She took several shaky breaths to calm her nervousness and fear.
Master Yoda finally looked up, addressing the other assembled Masters with the beginning of the ceremony. He spoke loud and clear, the voice of authority carrying over to everyone present:
“All Jedi, we are,” the Grand Master spoke, “speaks for us, the Force does. Through our actions, the Force proclaims itself and what is real. Today, we are here to acknowledge what the Force has proclaimed.” He focused on her. “Step forward, Padawan.”
The Padawans in the back all raised a collective breath as Mare stepped forward, getting down on her knees. Master Yoda raised his bright green lightsaber and proclaimed, “Mary Sue, by the right of the Council,” He touched his saber to her right shoulder, “By the will of the Force,” He touched her left shoulder, “Dub thee, I do. Jedi.” With a strike of his saber, he severed her Padawan braid, which fell to the floor in a grand gesture of leaving its host, “Knight of the Republic.”
Mare stood up proudly. All the Masters tipped their heads in acknowledgement to her. She could barely contain her excitement. There was no applause as that was not considered standard protocol, but she didn’t need any. She was just so elated. Master Yoda had the proudest smile he had had in a long time. She was now the greatest hero of the galaxy, all for doing absolutely nothing. She loved her life.
If only it didn’t have to end so soon.
Before she had any time to fully process what was going on, she disappeared in a flash of light and was gone in an instant.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 6: Mare Ruins The Hearth’s Warming Eve Chicken Dance
Meanwhile, in the A Second Chance universe…
Just then, a bloodcurdling scream could be heard from the other room and a purple pegasus guard ran towards the dining table, a look of pure terror on his face. Behind him was a giant angry rooster stomping and trying to bite his tail off. It was Carlos and he had now grown to his full monstrous size.
“WHO IN HOOFNESS’S NAME IS THAT?!!” Haven yelled, pointing with a shaky hoof at the towering Carlos that stood near the table and blocked the exit.
Discord gulped. “Perhaps I made him grow too big.”
“You WHAT?!” Sunny yelled, standing up from her stool. “You have some serious explaining to do, mister!”
“RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNN!!!!!!” The guard shrieked at the top of his lungs.
The guests all stood up and scattered at once in every single direction, trampling each other in a mad dash to escape. With Carlos distracted for a moment, some were able to push past him and run straight, while others went through the kitchen.
Sunny transformed into her alicorn form and began blasting at the rampaging chicken, who simply dodged her attacks by moving his head from side to side. She yelled with fury and continued to blast Carlos over and over, eventually managing to land a hit on his beak. He screamed and stomped on the dining room table in a fit of rage before moving on to the other fleeing ponies. Sunny watched this all go down with a mix of anger and fear.
Meanwhile, Izzy and Discord had taken off and were running for their lives when Carlos smashed through one of the walls and cornered them near the door. Izzy looked at Discord with pure terror in her eyes.
“We can’t let him into Maretime Bay!” she shouted. “Can you snap him back into an egg?”
“I-I need more than a few seconds to do that!” Discord shot back. “I can’t do it when we’re about to die! This is all my fault! All I wanted was to make you happy, Izzy! I didn’t want to go to this party. It was just too much pressure. I knew that I’d never fit in here! Not after so many moons!”
Izzy gasped, tears of sadness filling in her eyes. “You didn’t want to come?”
Discord closed his eyes and nodded through tears of his own. That was when Carlos began to reach down and open his massive beak up wide in order to take a bite out of them both. He glanced down at his friendship bracelet and remembered how Izzy had made that just for him as a sign of their true bond. She had gone out of her way to invite him of all creatures because she believed in him. She saw the good in him, even when he couldn’t see it in himself.
In that moment, he knew that he had to take a leap of faith. He couldn’t let Izzy die. Not his new best friend. He would not fail her like he did Fluttershy.
He would save her.
As he opened his eyes and stared at Izzy’s trembling, sobbing form, his eyebrows narrowed with determination. He slowly got to his feet and stood defiantly against the monster he had created. He briefly glanced at the other ponies to his right, who were all huddled in another corner and watching the display go down, before returning his attention to the front. Carlos reared his head back and let out a bellowing roar, fire spewing out of his beak that burned a gaping hole directly through the ceiling.
Discord then slowly raised his claw into the air and blasted the rooster back with his chaos magic. Carlos stumbled, roaring with fury. He launched himself at the Lord of Chaos, who blasted him back again. The rooster punched at the ground and unfurled his wings, only for Discord to do the same and catch him in a bubble of magic.
Carlos screeched and fought against his creator that was holding him hostage. Discord smirked and felt his old confident self return for but the briefest of moments. As he was doing this, Izzy looked up from the ground and her eyes went wide upon seeing him standing up for her like he was.
“Now I think it’s time we bring this chicken dance to a close,” he told his creation smugly. “I call my final move: the mating call!!”
And with that, he slowly reached out his claw and…
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIT!!!!” came a voice in front of him before he could snap his claws.
Discord instantly snapped to attention upon hearing this, only to see a purple earth pony with a green mane and tail (wait, didn’t I already say she had a green coat? Oh yeah, I did! Screw it, continuity is boring) running towards him at top speed. He looked confused as she came up to him as he had never seen this pony before in his life.
She stopped right in front of him, gasping for air. “Sorry! My name is Mare and I gotta tell you not to do that!!”
Discord paused, still holding the giant feral chicken with his magic. “And why not? I’ll have you know that Carlos is about to destroy everything!”
“Yeah, but if you do that,” Mare explained. “You’ll destroy the chicken, but you’ll feel extremely guilty and run off into the night, hoping to die alone. Then Izzy will find you and you’ll be forced to admit your feelings to her in a very sappy emotional moment.”
Discord gasped. “Me?! Emotionally vulnerable?! Well, we certainly can’t have that now, can we?! You should know how much I hate story clichés.”
“So do I. That’s why I’m here to prevent you from making that choice.”
“So…what would you suggest I do instead? I will not let him kill poor Izzy here.” He pointed at the trembling lavender unicorn on the floor. She was still sobbing and shaking with fear.
“Just let me take care of him,” suggested Mare happily. “I’ll take him back to the lair, where he will become part of the Time Reverse-inator. Edge and I need a living sacrifice, and Carlos will certainly do the trick.”
“Well, I don’t care about him anyway, soooooooo…” Discord thought it over for a moment, then he finally agreed. “Alright. You can take Carlos. But make sure he never steps one claw in this place ever again.”
“You have my word,” Mare promised him. “Not like he’ll be able to anyway. We’ll kill him.” And so, she grew a horn out of nowhere and levitated the now panicking Carlos over to her. Then, she blasted a portal open and stepped through it, disappearing from sight.
Discord stood there, still processing the random appearance of this pony that had just shown up to tell him his future and leave. He was a being of chaos, sure, but that was just something on a whole other level that he didn’t know how to explain it.
“Well that just happened.” Discord remarked to himself, shrugging. Right as he said that, a comedy drum was heard. He looked to his left, only to see Sunny operating a drum set.
“Well…someone had to do it.” Sunny said dryly.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 7: It’s A Cliché Emotional Moment, Eww/I Think It’s Time For A Speed Round!
“So…what do you plan to do with the Time Reverse-inator once it’s completed?” Mare asked Edgelord as he poured the ashes of the chicken onto the device. She was finally allowed to have a small break in between heists for her hard work, and she used this time to catch up with her friend and get to know him better.
Edgelord turned towards her, his face indicating deep thought. “I’m not sure, actually. Once we kill the princesses, I guess I want to…make some more happy endings with you. I mean, you’ve managed to provide more closure to some of those incomplete stories than Hawk could’ve ever dreamed of doing. The only thing he knew how to do is run away from his problems.”
“You knew him?” she inquired curiously.
“Of course I knew him,” Edgelord replied, smiling wistfully. “We used to be writing buddies a good while back, essentially collaborating together on stories. We did everything together. I thought up some of the greatest and most funniest premises for him to write about, and he would do them. It was perfect. He didn’t care about audiences or quality. He just wrote for the fun of it.” His face then fell.
Mare noticed this and took a couple steps towards him, her eyes gleaming with concern. “What happened…?”
Edgelord sighed deeply. “Eventually…Hawk joined Fimfiction and began writing G5 stories after his first G4 venture didn’t work out. I personally don’t like the generation, so I told him to stay out of it. But he just loved it too much. He began to take up activism. I began noticing the debates increasing, and…he began changing. There was the vitriol. He adopted the attitude of his opponents, became jaded…began focusing on his channel. He started leaving stories behind more and more…dooming them to be forever unfinished. Our partnership fell apart around the time he told me that he would no longer be finishing the stories he promised his audience back in December. He just abandoned them and focused solely on his stupid channel, thinking that he’s some sort of messiah. He tried to make a comeback since, but hasn’t succeeded. All the old stories we wrote together…forever incompleted. Some he never even wrote at all.”
Mare nodded in understanding. She now began to understand why she had been sent on these missions. So many of the worlds she had been sent to were incompleted stories, and she had essentially given them happy endings. She had done what her own author failed to do for her. Heck, her story essentially ended in her dying at the paws of her own teddy bear. She was never given a fair shot to be a real character. She was created to be an elaborate April Fools joke, and she wanted desperately to be more than that.
“I’m sorry…” she whispered, putting a hoof around his shoulder. “I know what it’s like to feel abandoned.”
Edgelord glanced back at her. “When I complete the Time Reverse-inator, I’m going back in time to complete all the stories Hawk and I did, give them proper endings. I will be a better author than he ever was. If he wants to be the G5 Chosen One, he can be that. But he brought these stories to life. They deserve closure.”
“I want to help…” Mare told him softly. “I want to change their fates too. I’ve been able to change the fates of some of these stories. If we can complete them, we should. But you shouldn’t do it alone. Let me help you.”
“You’d…really want to help me with that?”
“Of course. Hawk is gone now. You sent him to the Amazing Digital Circus. He’s never coming back from that. These stories are ours now, and I will never betray you.”
Edgelord smiled warmly. “Thanks…no one has ever really been there for me like that before.” He got to his hooves and his grin got even wider. “Look at what we’ve done here so far, Mare. Several down, several billion more to go. I never thought it would be this easy! I think it’s time for a speed round!”
“Let’s do it!!” Mare exclaimed, practically bouncing up and down with excitement.
“Next time ooooooooooooonnnnnn…”Meanwhile…in the Monarchy Chronicles universe…
Just then, there was a large shadow passed over them like lightning and suddenly, four of the the officers were incinerated by green flame.
A memory came to Stella’s mind.
Spike’s fire…the police escape…
“Are you kidding me?!” shouted the other one.
A golden beam of magic light hit the officer in the chest, disintegrating him immediately.
A small blue unicorn pony jumped down from a cell and faced Stella, “Stella! We’re here to rescue you!”
“What the?!” Clementine seemed shocked, “You’re a talking dog?!”
“A talking pony,” the unicorn corrected. She took Stella’s hand, “Come on! The exit’s right ahead!”
Stella didn’t know who this talking pony was, but she wasn’t going to argue, “Come on, guys!”
They ran towards the exit, the dragon catching up to them.
They reached the exit and opened it where they were confronted by military helicopters surrounding the area overhead.
The unicorn looked desperately at Stella, “The Flame! Use your Flame!”
“My what?” Stella asked, confused.
“Your fire powers,” said the unicorn, “Just imagine a thin ball of fire on your palms and release it at the flying machines.”
“Helicopters,” corrected Clementine.
“Whatever,” said the dragon.
“Actually, you don’t need to do that!” shouted Mare, running up towards them as fast as she could. She was running out of breath as she had already been through multiple prison hallways and was quickly getting exhausted. “Don’t do it!”
“Another one?!” Stella’s attention was now fully on her, her bewilderment only growing by the second. “Where are you all coming from?!”
“I don’t know this pony.” the unicorn deadpanned.
“WHO ARE YOU ?!” The dragon demanded angrily.
“It’s okay!” Mare assured them hurriedly. “I got the answer to all your problems!” And so, she grew a unicorn horn and blasted all of the helicopters out of the sky with a powerful beam of energy. They fell to the ground and exploded.
“Oh…well, that is convenient.” Clementine mused. “Why didn’t I think of having a literal Mary Sue answer all our problems?!”
“You’re welcome!” Mare quipped happily. “Now off to the next dimension!” Using her magic, she opened a portal and disappeared through it, vanishing from sight.Meanwhile, in the Daughters of Justice universe…
“We have to do this.”
“You’re talking resurrection?!” Michelle demanded incredulously, “I thought you were talking about reading up on Hawk’s book, not bringing him back to life!”
“You’re going to bring Mr. Hawk back to life…?” Silverstream asked hopefully, “I want to help too.”
“We don’t know how to do a resurrection spell,” Riley said, “Even if we wanted to, the technology is not available to us. We have no idea how to do it, even if we wanted to.”
“Actually we do,” Clementine countered, “I found out in the secret book you get when you become the CEO. With Hawk on our side, we’ll be able to win the war for sure! To think, two of the original Equestrian revolutionaries as part of our ranks, Admiral doesn’t stand a chance.”
“Can you find that exact page?” Harriet asked her.
“I should,” Clementine answered, “If not, it’s in Hawk’s book. It’s the right thing to do. Hawk was a beacon of hope. He inspired our ancestors when they were fighting amongst themselves, you heard Silverstream here! Can you imagine what a powerful leader he could be to us?”
“You are the leader, Clementine,” Michelle objected, “We don’t need to resurrect someone from the dead to do your job for you. Resurrecting a long-dead historical figure to do our bidding is immoral and unethical.”
“This may not be an appropriate time to do this,” Mare offered innocently. “But I would like to revisit the idea of the rainbow thing. Hello?”
“WHO ARE YOU ?!!” Harriet roared.
“Seriously, who are you?” Luz asked curiously. “I don’t remember you ever being part of our organization.”
“Doesn’t matter!” Mare replied, grinning. “See ya!!” She opened a portal and was gone in an instant, leaving no traces of her existence behind.Meanwhile, in the Misty Saga universe (again)…
Right as she was about to strike, however, the doors to the castle suddenly burst open and out walked Princess Twilight Sparkle herself. She was clad with silver battle armor that protected her entire body. She wore a knight’s helmet on her head and her mane had been neatly combed back. Her face was one of calm and collected anger as she walked towards the pony she had formerly called her own.
Her horseshoes made clip clop noises on the ground as she got closer. There was no fear present in the older alicorn’s facial features nor body, only determined resolution.
Lightning struck the ground beside where the two of them were destined to battle it out. They slowly walked towards each other until they each stopped in front of the other. Opaline’s expression was one of pure hatred while Twilight’s was calm and collected, yet masking a mother’s pain.
“I have come home, master.” Opaline declared darkly.
“This is no longer your home,” Twilight told her firmly. “And I am no longer your master.”
“Ah yes,” Opaline sneered. “You chose your precious idol over me and wouldn’t let me explain myself when I needed to. Tell me. Where are those…Pillars of yours? Perhaps I might’ve put them out of commission on the way here?”
“This battle is between you and me.”
Opaline frowned in disappointment. “So…that is how it’s going to be.”
Twilight nodded, getting into a defensive stance. “That is how it must be. I will cleanse Equestria of your wrath, even if I must die in the process.”
“You guys don’t really need to fight,” Mare cut in, frowning. “Princess, you two are like family. Why not talk it out instead? I know you think Opaline was being malicious when she attacked those guards, but she was just trying to help you.”
Twilight did a double take. “Wait, she was?!”
“I mean, yeah!!” Opaline yelled. “Why else would I have gone to the Archives, dum dum?! I knew you were worried about me, and I wanted nothing more than to help you find the answer! And instead, you shut me out of your life!!”
“Oh…” Twilight was caught off guard by this answer and didn’t know how to process it. “So Starswirl and I banished you…for essentially nothing. Oh dear. We thought you had murdered those guards intentionally.”
“I would never do that!” Opaline protested. “They wouldn’t let me in, and I was just so scared about what was going on that I just…I just snapped. I wasn’t thinking straight, I’m sorry.” She hung her head low. “You don’t know how much you mean to me, Princess…you’re practically my only family. When you rejected me…it hurt more than anything in the world.”
Twilight sighed deeply, realizing at once the horrible mistake she had made. “Oh for pony’s sake…” She took off her helmet and threw it onto the ground. “Opaline, I would like to apologize…for everything. I hurt you, and…I should’ve listened to you. Neither Starswirl nor I were in the best headspace that night. All I wanted to do was help cure you, and I didn’t want you to worry about it. I should’ve been more transparent and let you in on what we were doing.”
“It’s okay, Princess…” Opaline said, smiling a bit. “I know how much you care about me and…I should’ve listened to you when you told me to stay out of it. Maybe we were all a little wrong here.”
“Well, even the Princess of Friendship isn’t above making mistakes in her field,” Twilight replied, smiling back at her. “Clearly, I still got a lot to learn about having an apprentice. Come here.”
The two alicorns embraced one another, all of the pain and resentment disappearing in a grand act of familial love. Seeing that her work was finished, Mare vanished from sight through an open portal.Meanwhile, in the Sanctuary-Haven universe…
“Lemon Hearts! Twinkleshine!” Minuette greeted them. “You made it! I thought we would have to come over and get you guys!”
“We came as fast as we could upon you telling us that Twilight was here,” Twinkleshine answered. “Any sighting from the purple nerd is an all hooves on deck moment as I always say.”
Lemon Hearts giggled at that. “Same. I dropped everything. I arranged for us to all hang out at Donut Joe’s. Wanna come?”
Minuette gasped. “Would we?!” She grinned, glancing back at Twilight. “Come on, Twilight! We’re going to eat lunch together!”
Twilight overheard her name being called and snapped to attention, getting down from the sofa and heading towards the door. She didn’t know what was going to be in her future, but she knew that she couldn’t stop now. She had to apologize to the rest of her friends no matter what. Only then would she truly be able to atone for the sins of her past.
“Let’s do this.” she stated determinedly.
“Can I come too?” Mare asked, popping into existence and startling everypony present. She grinned at them widely. “Hey, I'm here! You know, I can't wait to hang out alongside my friends. We're gonna make gr—“Meanwhile, in an unknown universe……
“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!” the fillies cheered as Mare danced like a fool in front of them.Meanwhile, in another unknown universe…
“GET OFF THE STAGE!!!!!” a stallion yelled from the back of the audience, throwing a giant piano at her, as well as a tomato. Upon impact, the items exploded into a massive blast of energy, totaling everything and annihilating every single living creature in Equestria.Meanwhile, in a possibly upcoming story universe…
“Hooray!! We’re all alicorns now!!” Sunny exclaimed happily as she and her friends flew through the clouds together. “Thank you so much, Mare!”
“You’re welcome!” Mare replied proudly.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 8: You’re Not Worth It! Guess What?! I’m The Bad Guy!! WHAT?!!
“Why?” Edgelord asked, obviously not seeing anything wrong with continuing the madness even further. He pouted. “But I was having so much fun!”
“Because…” Mare answered, walking towards him and holding up a severed half of an ouija board in her hooves. “I got the last piece! We can put the full device together now!”
“You found it!” exclaimed Edgelord, gasping. He ran up to the piece and grabbing it with his magic. “I am so proud of you. Now let’s put this baby together and use it!!”
And so, he and Mare rushed to his secret laboratory that he conveniently has for some reason and put the pieces on the operating table. They began sparkling with electricity due to the close proximity, a magical energy surge out of a desire to connect. Mare couldn’t believe that the moment she had been waiting for was finally here. She had gone through so much in order to get home, and now she was finally going to become the hero she knew she could be. She was no longer a joke character. She would now be the pony who saved her Equestria, and the entire multiverse along with it.
Wasting no time, she picked up her blue lightsaber and put it next to the piano key. Both pieces fused together seamlessly into a piece of the device. Edgelord then picked up the fragment that he already had, and put it next to the newly created one. The parts morphed into one half of a purple circular disc. Then, Mare picked up the picture of Twilight and her Canterlot friends together and fused it with the disc. The parts came together and another quarter of it was completed.
As the process continued, she could feel the power rumbling within the device, slowly awakening after thousands of years. It had been hidden away, but now it had been found. The power called to her, silently begging to be made whole again. Practically entranced by the machine, she grabbed the jar of Stella’s Flame and fed it into the device. It shimmered as it absorbed the energy. There was no stopping it now. The hypnotic call of the Time Reverse-inator rang on all sides. There was only three pieces left to restore, and it would be complete.
Finally, Mare took the Unity Crystals in her hooves and dropped it into the machine. There was a brilliant burst of magic and she was sent falling back along with Edgelord. The whole room was lit up in a blinding, pulsing white light. When it had faded, a purple and pink circular amulet remained on the table, sparkling with dark energy.
Edgelord cautiously approached it and levitated it upwards and around his neck. He had the biggest grin on his face as he did so, almost like an eager puppy that had just been given a bowl of its favorite food. The expression on his face was almost animalistic, sadistic even. He slowly walked over to her and stopped right where she was.
“We did it!” Mare said proudly. “Now…who’s going to use it first? Why don’t I restore my world first, and then you can use it to erase the princesses?” That was when she noticed his smile becoming even wider and she began to grow apprehensive. “Edge…?”
Edgelord chuckled to himself. “Oh, Mare. If only there was someone out there who loved you.”
Mare took a couple of steps back in shock. “What…?”
“I told you about Hawk and how he kept running away from his problems,” Edgelord replied. “As he was so beloved by his audience, I didn’t stand a chance. I knew I’d have to usurp him somehow.”
“But...what are you talking about?” Mare asked, trembling a bit from fear. This couldn’t be real. He had to be just teasing her. Edge couldn’t be evil, he just couldn’t be. She thought she finally had a friend who understood her. She thought that she was going to get her happy ending at long last.
“I told Hawk how much I hated G5 and how I didn’t want him pursuing it in his writing craft,” he explained cruelly. “I told him that he needed to tone it down, that it was just a show. But he kept brushing me off and telling me I was wrong! He told me that I needed to change my perspective!! Me!! As if I was the one BURNING BRIDGES WITH OTHERS!!!!!”
“Edge…!”
“I saw an opportunity to get back at him,” Edgelord continued triumphantly. “To make him see how wrong he was. Once I discovered how to open portals to other worlds, I made an arrangement with Caine to send him to the Circus, so that he would never interfere with my plans again! I figured, I would go back and rewrite his stories in my image! Completely erase the G5 fics! And lastly…I would take over his channel and rebrand it to be against this generation!”
“Edge, no!!” Mare cried. “Y-you said y-you wanted to give them happy endings! You said you would give me mine!!” Tears were forming in her eyes now. She had been tricked, and there was nothing she could do about it now.
“But you just had to be a thorn in my side…and you were dumb enough to believe that I was going to help you.” Edgelord mused, completely ignoring her.
“Please…!”
“Now all that’s left to do is rewrite the multiverse in my image…” Edgelord finished calmly. “And completely erase Hawk from all of existence. He thought he could push me aside and tell me how to think. Well, he’s about to realize just what happens when you push away your only ally!”
“You’re no match for Hawk!” Mare protested, running after him as he walked towards the door.
“No,” countered Edgelord, blasting her back with his magic. “You’re no match for Hawk. I, on the other hoof, am the hero who’s going to Save My Little Pony from G5, and its cultist fans.”
“You won’t get away with this!” Mare shrieked through tears.
Edgelord was unfazed by her threat. “Oh…I already have. By the way, say hello to the other characters for me, will you? The characters whose stories you helped me ruin.” With that, he blasted a massive hole in the floor and Mare fell through it, screaming as she descended into the depths of the void below.
Seeing no other threat to his power, he locked the door and prepared to launch his final assault on the Admiral Producer Multiverse. He was going to win the war against the G5 fandom, and no one would be there to stop him ever again.
The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 9: The Fake Ending
And so…the story multiverse became an apocalyptic cesspool…forevermore. The End.
“Wait a minute…” Seashell realized with horror. “That’s a terrible ending!” All the fillies in her circle panicked and ran around in circles, screaming their heads off.
“This can’t be right!” Violette Rainbow agreed, similarly protesting the sudden and arbitrary ending. “Mare gets betrayed by you?! AND THE STORY’S OVER?!!”
Scootaloo banged her head on the school bell repeatedly, setting off the alarm. “Ow. Ow. Ow!”
Apple Bloom took matters into her own hooves amidst all the commotion and confronted Edgelord herself, stopping him from leaving the library by putting her hoof on the book.
“There ain’t no way that is the end of the story!” she protested.
Edgelord smirked at her. “Oh…of course it is, you’ll see.” He turned towards Glory and looked the pegasus feather in the eyes. “Um, Glory, just turn around.”
Glory nodded slowly, turning around and yelping upon feeling one of her wing feathers being plucked. “Ow! Hey, I need that to fly, you jerk!”
Wasting no time, he made some ink appear out of nowhere and dipped his makeshift quill in it. Using it, he wrote on the very back of the book the words: THE END.
Unfortunately, the fillies didn’t take it well as that was when Violette Rainbow ran up to him and began trying to tear the fake ending page off with her teeth. “That’s not the end!”
“Yes it is!” Edgelord shot back. “You let go, you little brat-“ Unfortunately for him, the pull was too strong and he fell over into a trash can. As he recovered, he saw those blasted fillies triumphantly walk up to him.
“You better keep reading, Mr. Edgy,” Sweetie Belle warned him, aiming her butt at his face. The others followed suit. “Or else!”
With that, Scootaloo came down and took the fake ending page from Violette, dropping it from the window and all the way into the moat below. “I know I shouldn’t be littering, but that ending was rubbish! Rubbish! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!”
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 10: The Realm of Failed Stories/Do You Choose Yourself?
Mare was awoken by the sound of light chatter. Fluttering her eyes open, she immediately closed them again upon being blinded by a bright white light. The last thing she remembered was crash landing in a part of the void after running out of energy.
“Turn off the light…” she could hear another voice say, “…she’s awake…”
The strange creatures above her turned off the bright light and she sat up, wincing in pain as she did so.
“Careful now,” one of them said, “We just applied some of them bandages on ya. Ya got pretty dinged up out there on that field.”
“Where…am I…?” Mare asked groggily. Now she could see that several other creatures were in the room staring at her curiously and with fear.
“You’re in the infirmary,” a tall human girl with brown hair and a white hat came over to her, “Greetings. I am Clementine and welcome to the Realm of Failed Stories. You crash landed outside the void.“
“You saved me…?” Mare inquired, not fully understanding.
Clementine nodded, though her face was that of a faint scowl. “You’re in our makeshift headquarters. You know, you should consider yourself lucky. After everything you did, I don’t think you deserve to be saved.”
“What did I do…?” Mare asked weakly, tears coming to her eyes once more as she realized at once what she had done. “Oh no. The stories. I-“
“You altered the endings of our stories,” came another voice. Through blurry vision, she saw a blue unicorn with a red and purple mane and tail. “In doing so, you destroyed our worlds and displaced us here.” She stopped in front of her. “My name’s Misty, not like you would care about that…”
Mare slowly sat up in her bed, wincing from the pain of doing so. Now that she was at a better angle, she could see where she was more clearly now. The infirmary she was in had brown walls and a single fan up above the ceiling. The lighting was dim, but she could easily make out over a hundred other characters standing there, both humans and ponies, watching and glaring at her.
Unlike the others though, Misty seemed to hold no animosity towards her, only an expression of sadness at the events that had transpired. Instantly, Mare felt awful for all of them. They didn’t deserve to have this happen. They were all living their lives in peace until she had interfered with the natural order and destroyed everything. What kind of pony was she? In her mind, she deserved to be shamed and scolded relentlessly for what happened.
She vowed that she would never forgive herself for it. For all she was concerned, she deserved to rot in the deepest and darkest dungeons. She deserved to be beaten up and stabbed to death with a knife. She didn’t deserve to live. She couldn’t do anything right. She couldn’t save anypony she loved. She was nothing but a failure who was somehow allowed to exist by the powers that be.
“I’m so sorry…” Mare apologized, sniffling. “I didn’t mean for this to happen…all I wanted was to get my happy ending.”
“At the expense of ours?!” Sprout demanded, storming up towards her. “You promised me I would get to rule alongside you! But instead, you DESTROYED EVERYTHING I EVER BUILT!!!”
“Without Peanut’s marker,” June added angrily. “I was unable to fix Clockwork Swings and restore Wonderland. Greta and Steve are working over time to keep everyone’s spirits high. But if they knew what you did, oh boy. You’d wish the Darkness was still present to suck you up.”
Mare felt her heart shatter into a million pieces at that statement. Tears gathered at the corners of her eyes and she began sobbing as she desperately tried to think of something to say, anything that would explain her act of cowardice to them. She had no defense, no excuse, no explanation that would absolve her of any guilt. She was at fault and there was nothing she could say to defend herself no matter how hard she tried.
“Please listen to me!” Mare snapped through tears and sniffles. “I was killed back in my own timeline! Everypony I ever knew was wiped out by someone close to me! I was dead…but then I was recovered by Prince Edgelord and…he took me in and…he promised he would help me get my life back! And all I had to do was-“
“-do some evil deeds for him,” Misty finished for her, slowly nodding in understanding. She out of everyone knew what it was like to be manipulated and coerced to do horrible things, all for the promise of that other person granting your greatest desire. “I get it…”
“That’s no excuse!” Moana cut in. She walked over and pointed an accusatory finger at her. “You still stole my paddle and took off with it! After we gave you everything! We gave you a hero’s celebration and this is how you repaid us! You have no idea how many people were killed in the destruction of our world…and it’s all because of you!!”
“Moana, stop!” Misty argued. “She’s been through enough already! I know you’re angry and you have every right to be! But that doesn’t mean-“
“HALF OF US WERE ALREADY ABANDONED!!!” June shouted, interrupting her. “We were already dealt a heavy blow by our stories being doomed to forever be incomplete. The least this clown could’ve done was let us exist in peace!!”
“She didn’t know any better!!” Misty shot back.
“Edge told me that I was helping you all get happy endings!” Mare sobbed. “I thought I was…doing a good thing.” She hung her head low. “I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve this…”
“You could’ve left us alone,” Princess Twilight admonished her gently. The graceful alicorn walked over to her. “You completely changed the time stream in doing what you did. You may have wanted to restore your world, but nothing should be worth destroying the lives of others.”
“Princess…” Mare looked up and into the eyes of the pony who had once offered her the position of being her faithful student where she had come from. “I know, it’s just…all I wanted was…was…” She trailed off. She couldn’t say it. They wouldn’t understand it.
Fortunately for her, she didn’t have to answer.
“You wanted to be somepony special,” Misty deduced softly. “This Edgelord pony told you that only through him could you get what you wanted. Feeling helpless and like you had no way out…you agreed…under specific conditions that he then broke. He used you to get what he wanted.”
Mare nodded, wiping her tears away. “Wait…how did you know that? I never told you. I never even met you until now.”
“Judging by what you’ve already said,” Misty explained sadly. “It was pretty obvious…and…I’ve been through it too…it’s still fresh for me…” She looked down at the floor. “After everything I did and how much I failed Sunny…I’m starting to think if maybe she and the others dying was a good thing…”
“I cut Opaline out of my life…” Twilight revealed, her voice trembling with emotion. “…When she didn’t deserve it. The one thing I can give you credit for is bringing us back together…my anger at the world after my friends died made me push away the concepts of friendship and love entirely…until I found her. Sometimes loss cuts deep and you have to live with the consequences. Even if you can bring them back…doesn’t mean you should. Especially if the consequences are this catastrophic.”
“I want nothing more than to tear Edgelord to pieces,” Mare stated bitterly. “She took advantage of me…and didn’t care about doing so…He made me think he was my friend…and then he took all my hope away.”
“Sometimes, that’s what people do.” June answered, her tone softening a bit. “People get taken from you, your hopes and dreams are shattered. The best thing you can do is try to move on from it, to keep that little light in you shining bright…no matter how much it hurts doing so…”
Mare sniffled, looking away. “I wanted nothing more than to become more than what I was created to be…I thought that by saving everyone, I would be seen as more than just a simple April Fools joke character. Maybe I could…finally be the hero of my own story…without constant jokes being made at my expense.”
“We all want that…” Moana advised her. “But sometimes…being a hero doesn’t mean epic adventures across space and time, or doing battle with a giant lava monster…sometimes, being a hero means just doing the right thing.”
“The question you must answer now is this,” Clementine stated a matter-of-factly. “You’re the one here, and you seem like a good person. But I can't give you anything unless you choose to accept it. So the question is, will you choose yourself?”
Mare sighed deeply before taking a deep breath…
Once she was recovered, Mare was called to the Research Center by Clementine. Accompanied by Misty and Stella, she headed over to receive shocking news from the Daughters of Justice team, who were looking into the tracker that had been installed in her head previously. While she had been asleep, it had been surgically removed to be analyzed.
“It formerly belonged to Hawk Nightwing,” said one of the girls to them, “This tracker has a map to his location!”
“Wait, are you serious?” Silverstream asked, “This is so The Force Awakens right now. Alright. Let’s display it.”
They plugged in the tracker to the board and it lit up with all these different coordinates on a multiversal map.
“Hawk once owned this tracker,” Michelle explained, “He used it to, let’s say, keep track of his location when he traversed the multiverse. When Edge banished him, he forgot to destroy this clue that could lead to where Hawk was. This is the clue!” She smiled widely, “Mare, you’ve had the key to finding Hawk Nightwing inside of you this whole time!”
“You’re awesome, Mare!” Misty exclaimed.
“Thanks, Misty.” Mare replied. She faced the girls, “But who’s going to find him? Someone’s got to go and get him back, right?”
Clementine nodded.
“It says here,” explained Harriet, zooming in the map to where the red dot was. “That the approximate location of Hawk’s current place of residence is all the way in…the real world?! All the way in Hawaii?!”
“But Edge told me he got sent to the Circus!” Mare insisted. “Unless he lied about that too. I don’t even know anymore.”
“Looks like he escaped,” Moana mused. “Though how he was able to do that is beyond me. Anyways, you and Misty gotta find him and bring him back. Only he can reverse the tide and restore the multiverse he created.”
“So essentially, you guys have to find the bloke who has no interest in ending our stories,” June said sarcastically. “That’s always good. Though I suppose, no creator, no world. And I don’t trust this Edgelord to ‘rewrite’ us.”
“What kind of name is that anyway?” Stella wondered, confused. “I mean, I get names like Celestia, Luna, even Opaline. But Edgelord? It’s just a name that screams ‘this is the villain’ to your face.”
“Who knows?” Misty answered.
“Once you two get him back,” Clementine told them. “You three must find some way to get the Time Reverse-inator out of his clutches. Then use it to turn back the clock on our worlds.”
“Do you think it’ll work?” Mare asked.
“How should I know?” Clementine replied in an annoyed tone. “We haven’t tested it yet.” She faced her. “But Mare, it all comes down to you. You want to be the hero of your story? Now’s your chance. Get Hawk back and tell him what his evil partner has done to us.”
“I don’t believe it,” Misty said, smiling. “We actually have a plan.”
“We have a plan.” June affirmed.
“This is the only way…” Clementine concluded. Facing the others, she declared, “We can’t do this alone, there’s no victory without him!!”
With that, it was agreed that they would bring Hawk back no matter what it took.
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 11: Larry, We GOTTA Get The AUTHOR Back!!!! Why?
The blimp (officially the Marestream II ) landed on the Big Island and Mare somehow managed to book a hotel thanks to her clever way of speaking to the manager to give she and Misty a free week-long stay.
They got a big suite in the hotel with two beds for each of them. When the hotel manager left and they were sure they were alone, they checked over photographs they were given of Hawk Nightwing and they realized that the manager they were with looked slightly familiar in terms of having orange eyes, whereas no one else in the lobby had that.
With that information, Mare and Misty headed downstairs using the elevator to confront the manager about the photographs, and he kept evading them. They ended up living at the hotel for almost a week. But Mare grew agitated day by day, as she knew that the longer they wasted, the more worlds were being plundered. So she kept trying to get the strange manager to slip up to no success. One day though, he was able to trick him into revealing his identity by asking him questions only he would know. The facade quickly crumbled.
The manager sighed, transforming into his regular batpony form, “Okay fine fine, you got me. I am Hawk Nightwing, the most unapologetic defender of G5 you’ll ever meet! Live and in person. One night only. I had a feeling the disguise Caine gave me wouldn’t fool anyone, let alone the characters from stories I created. Are my stories sentient now? I’m confused.”
“The legendary Hawk Nightwing!” Misty exclaimed excitedly. “I can’t believe this, you…you created some of the greatest G5 stories about me! I didn’t think you were real.”
Hawk laughed, “Well, I’m real.” He faced she and Mare, “I had no idea I was so famous. How did you both find me here?”
Wasting no time, Mare explained to him about the whole situation with Edgelord, and how the multiverse of stories he had created was under attack. All while he was hearing this, Hawk’s expression grew even more grim with each passing second, with even tiny flickers of regret in there. It was obvious that he knew he made a mistake by not returning as fast as he could, but he was hiding something, and she could tell. She was determined to get the truth out of him if it was the last thing she did.
“So why haven’t you come back?!” Mare demanded incredulously. “Your stories are about to be wiped from existence and you’re just sitting here at a resort, not even caring?! I got betrayed by a discount twist villain for pony’s sake!!”
“I agree,” Misty piped up. “Look, I know you might have your reasons to stay here and I respect them, sure. But please…come back with us. We need you…”
Hawk sighed deeply, seemingly realizing that he could no longer hide the fact that he had bailed on his own characters. “Okay. Okay, okay, okay. You both deserve the truth…especially you, Misty. It all started a couple of weeks ago…”
“I was going through another debate on Fimfiction with a user who was hating on a Make Your Mark episode. The exchange got quite heated to say the least, and I eventually just stopped once I got the upper hoof. But unlike in previous exchanges, it didn’t feel right. My victory felt cold and empty. Then I realized…I was becoming the very thing I had sworn to destroy, the same vitriol, the same hatred.
I tried to get my mind off how I was feeling, but I just felt stuck. And I began to realize, despite all of the praise, the likes, the cult leader-like status my commenters bestowed upon me…they had something that I didn’t. Happiness. Logging on to defend G5 didn’t feel good anymore, especially when it resulted in the burning of so many bridges. I had already told off Edgelord after we got into a fight regarding the future of my stories. I was pro-G5, he wasn’t…and I asserted my will to my own detriment. Every day just more of that, more of the same. People telling me that I couldn’t handle opinions and that I was too obsessed. Even as I tried to move on from my horrible past, it still haunted me, and things just kept getting worse for me day by day. The reader engagement on my blogs was practically nonexistent and attempts to make comebacks kept failing. I no longer felt that passion for what I was doing, writing or videos. I wanted to just stop and retire. But I couldn’t just tell my audience I was quitting the fandom.
That’s when I got the brilliant idea…to voluntarily surrender.”
“Hawk Nightwing!” Prince Edgelord declared, triumphantly bursting through the door of Admiral Producer Studios. “I have come to take revenge on you for rejecting me! I will erase you and your precious generation from history!!”
I turned towards him, smiling peacefully. “Ah, Edge. You came early. I was wondering when you were gonna show up to take me down. Yes, I surrender.”
“No!” Edgelord shouted. “You will surrender, or-“ He paused, realizing what I had just said. “Wait…what?!”
“Where do you think that map to my location came from, sillyhead?” I asked him jokingly. “I sent it through the mail. Send me to wherever you think is best. You’re in charge now, you’ll do great. Bye.”
Once that blast of magic hit my computer, I’ve never felt so alive. Before I was sucked through the portal to the Circus, I reached into my saddlebag and threw the key to the multiverse over to him. Hawk Nightwing was officially FIRED!”
“…And Nighty Night was born!” Hawk finished proudly.
“Nighty Night?” Misty asked with a confused tilt of her head, clearly not getting the joke that came with the name.
“That way I can keep a low profile without completely erasing my name!” Hawk explained with a grin. “That’s what the people here in this hotel call me anyway. I founded this hotel to be the perfect resort, inspired by some of the Resort Hotels I stayed in while at Walt Disney World, of course.”
“You’re horrible!!” Mare screamed, throwing random objects at his face, all of which bounced off harmlessly. “You brought us all to life and then abandoned us, and then you abandoned your own fans who relied on you!! Who would do that?!”
“I’m with you!” Misty agreed. She looked at him straight in the eyes. “Hawk…we need you. I know you’re afraid of going back to your old ways, but you built up a following of people who love your work! Why would you leave them…?”
“It was the expectation, Misty,” Hawk said solemnly. “I had already crafted a beautiful Saga with you. I could never hope to top that. My glory days ended when your story did, and since then, I’d been fighting a losing battle with people who would rather send death threats to those they disagree with than listen. Eventually…I just decided it wasn’t worth it. The fandom I knew was dead. And truth be told, without Edge, that spark I had for finishing some of my old stories wasn’t there anymore. I can’t go back. If I did, it wouldn’t really be me. It would be artificial, by the numbers. I would just be…too scared to lose any other friends than defend G5 to the best of my ability.”
“So you’re just…going to condemn us all to death?” Mare asked him, her eyes widening. “You don’t even care enough to stop Edge?”
“I can’t defeat him…” Hawk answered her. “Not when he’s this powerful. But you…you were created to be intentionally OP. If anyone can take him down, it’s you. I’m not strong enough to face my past, face them . So I’d rather not try…if you knew how much I suffered while doing my job, you’d understand.”
“But…?” Mare tried to say, but was cut off by a reassuring hoof on her chin. She stared into the eyes of her creator, tears welling up in her eyes.
“Mare,” he assured her sadly. “You’re stronger than you know. I initially wrote you to be a joke, but you’ve already proven to be so much more than that. I’m sorry. I really am. I’m a coward, and I’m…I’m done. You know, little pony, there’s a yin for every yang. If there’s bad, good will rise up against it. It’s taken me a long time to find my calling. Now it’s about time you find yours.”
Mare and Misty checked out of the hotel later that day.
“I can’t believe he won’t help us,” Mare stated angrily, stomping her hoof on the floor in frustration. Misty flinched at this gesture, but she didn’t notice. “The multiverse relied on him and he just deserted it! We’re his creations, why doesn’t he care?!”
Misty looked back at her. “So…what do we do now? We can’t go back to the others. If they know that their creator is a coward, then…they’ll probably lose more faith than they already have.”
“Then they won’t…” Mare decided.
“What?”
“My journey will not be meaningless,” Mare told her firmly. “I’ve suffered too much to get to this point, and I’m not about to let Edge win. He’s taken everything from me, and he’s about to do the same to others. No matter what happens, I’m finishing this mission.”
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The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Chapter 12: We Got This Together/All Stories Deserve Their Ending
CRASH!!!!
Lightning flashed across the stormy and dreary skies of the Void and struck the ground below it in a powerful display of fury. Storms were not usually this powerful, but it was as if Mother Nature knew the horrible atrocities that were about to be committed and was sending a cautionary message, warning those responsible to not proceed or suffer the consequences of their actions.
Another bolt of lightning flashed across the sky and roaring thunder sounded in response as the clouds grumbled angrily. Through the howling wind and pouring rain, Mare ran as fast as she could in the direction of Edgelord’s lair. She had to get there in time. She had to snatch the Time Reverse-inator before it was too late. Knowing how dangerous the mission was, she had sent Misty back to the others to inform them of their failure without divulging all the details of how they did so. The other characters needed to see a leader that was strong and courageous. In her eyes, the truth wasn’t enough. Sometimes, ponies needed more. In these trying times, they deserved to have their faith in somepony else rewarded.
And she was going to make sure that Hawk’s faith in her would be the same. She didn’t care if she died in the process. At least she would die a true hero. She had come this far, and she wasn’t about to back out now. The entire fabric of reality was counting on her and she knew it. There was no time for negotiations, no time for second thoughts. Every second mattered. She would see the multiverse restored if it was the last thing she did.
As she stopped in front of the lair, she saw a horde of undead zombies guarding it at every corner. They were all eying her and anticipating her next move. Edgelord had come prepared. He knew she was coming. Why wouldn’t he? He had the keys to unlock any realm he wanted and spy on it. She silently cursed herself for not anticipating that he would do this.
“AND SO YOU HAVE RETURNED!!!!” boomed Edgelord’s disembodied voice in the sky. “I should’ve known you would come back to stop me. TOO BAD YOU WILL DIE IN THE PROCESS !!!!!”
“I’m done helping you, Edge!” Mare shouted back. “I won’t let you destroy what Hawk built! This ends now!!”
Edgelord laughed maniacally, his disembodied voice causing more thunder to clap and lightning to strike as he spoke. “And how do you plan to stop me, little pony?! I have magic, and YOU HAVE NOTHING!!!!”
“She has us!” Mare spun around at the sound of Misty’s voice. To her utter shock, she saw an army of people; all made up of humans, ponies, and other creatures, emerge from a portal and stand right behind her. Misty was leading them, her horn emitting a pink aura of magic.
“You came back!” Mare exclaimed.
“Did you really think we were gonna leave you to face Hawk’s insane ex-boyfriend alone?” June asked, holding a new yellow pen in her hand. “Though, I will be honest. Misty was very persuasive.”
“That crazy alicorn destroyed our home,” Twilight said proudly. “But I figured if there was one small thing we could do, it would be this. And we’re ready to kick some zombie flank!”
“Heck yeah!” Opaline cheered. “Maximum undead carnage for the win!” She turned towards Twilight. “We are having Zombie Soup for dinner once this is all over, right Princess?”
“Well, if you’re able to kill one yourself,” Twilight answered kindly. “I don’t see why not.”
“Yeah!”
“It still feels weird to see you suddenly reformed, Opaline.” Misty commented.
Mare couldn’t help but feel tears of gratitude and relief come to her eyes. She wasn’t alone in this. They had all come to help her finish the job. She had the backing of the entire multiverse on her side, and nothing was going to stop her now. It was a good thing that they did too, because right as she was thinking that, the zombies began charging at them.
“Alright!” she declared. “Here’s the plan. We’re going to dispel the army in a four way attack. Clementine, you and the Daughters of Justice will form your own coalition to take out one side. Then, June and the Wonderlandians will tackle another. Lee, MJ, young Clementine, AJ, and whoever else is on the Allied Powers, you guys will handle another part of the fleet, Silverstream and the Jedi will do the same, so on and so fourth.”
“And what about you?” MJ asked worriedly.
“I’m going to confront Edgelord alone.” Mare decided firmly. When they all gasped, she rushed to reassure them. “Nopony is alone who has friends. I’ll be okay. If there’s one thing I know, he won’t kill me. I’ll be out with the Time Reverse-inator in no time!”
“You got this, Mare!” Amy encouraged her.
Mare stared out at the approaching horde and smiled. She knew she should be afraid, but she wasn’t. Not this time. “No, Amy.” She faced all her teammates and stood proudly at the front of the whole army. “We got this. Together.”
“That’s my future apprentice!” Twilight complimented her happily.
“CHARGE!!!!!” Mare screamed at the top of her lungs. That was when she and the army charged into battle and engaged the zombies. The area surrounding the lair soon turned into a full on battlefield with millions of combatants all split into their own teams. On this fateful night, the impossible had at last been made possible. All the characters from hundreds of Hawk’s stories were united and fighting as one.
On her own team, Misty charged at a couple of zombies, both of which brandished swords and ran towards her in response with them. She brandished a knife of her own and threw it at them, instantly killing them with a dying shriek. It wasn’t long before more zombies from above came at her in the hundreds. She sliced through as many as she could, but they were far too numerous for her to beat alone and they just kept swarming her.
She gritted her teeth and continued to slice, but a much larger zombie knocked the knife out of her hooves and pounced on her. She fought in its grip, but it snarled and swiped at her face, making it impossible to see where she was aiming.
That was when Izzy came sprinting in with a bow and arrow, shouting a battle cry. She loaded an arrow and shot it at the zombie, knocking it out of the air and causing it to drop Misty, sending her crashing towards the ground with it. She landed on her stomach and quickly recovered, joining her sister and engaging a squad of Umbrum that were heading straight towards them.
Misty kicked one in the stomach, which infuriated it and it started punching at her. She got at its hoof, which caused it to recoil, right in time for June to charge in and slice it into two halves, both of which fell to the floor in a pathetic heap, blood squirting out of its body. She kicked its remains and moved onto the next target faster than he had arrived. Misty used this opening to leap into the air and slice four zombies right through the head as they ran. They crumpled to the floor, instantly, their eyes wide open in horror.
About a hundred girls from the Daughters of Justice came pouring out of nowhere, all screaming battle cries. Immediately, millions of arrows rained down upon the enemy troops. The girls standing guard all threw their spears at the zombies.
Although they were fast, they were no match for the Daughters’ speed and agility. Each undead creature went down under rains of blows, kicks, and punches. One of them tried to grab a blonde-haired girl running by, but she seemed to anticipate it, kicking it in the nuts, causing it to crumple to the ground.
The attack was in full force and the remaining one hundred zombies on that side standing tried to shoot their way through the attacking defenders, but they zig zagged in formation, avoiding every single one of them. The zombie general that was leading the attack ran at a smaller squadron of Daughters, but before he could react, America Chavez jumped down from out of nowhere and with a loud yell, punched him to the ground. As he struggled to get up, snarling and growling, America held him down, soon being joined by Amanda and Luz. After stabbing him with their spears, they kicked him over to a curb, purple blood pouring out of his chest wound as he landed with a sickening crunch.
Without their leader, the other zombies were no match for the combined force of girls taking them down. The main Daughters of Justice shot their way through the retreating soldiers as Amanda and America teamed up to punch as many stray soldiers running as they could. Striking down some more stray zombie soldiers with their swords, Riley and Harriet kicked the bodies aside, letting Luz beat each one of them senseless with her la chancla.
It was a brutal battle. With a yell, Clementine raised up a fallen bow and shot through three of the four the retreating soldiers holding the zombie general, leaving only one left to pick up the heavy body and run.
On the other side, Silverstream, Anakin, and Katooni were making quick work of the zombies attacking them. They sliced through them in droves with their lightsabers. The three sliced their way through the remaining zombies, yelling as they did so. Katooni did a somersault in the air and sliced one of them through the top of its head. She pulled out the lightsaber as it fell to the ground in a lifeless state. Silver did the same, though she fell flat on her face when she landed. She got to her claws and sliced through the last attacker, pulling the sword out and panting with exhaustion.
Her victory was short-lived as several zombies then appeared out of nowhere and charged at them at full speed, roaring and shrieking with unholy fury. They held javelins in their hooves and their robes blew back in the wind. One of them bared its teeth and lunged at them with full speed. Its face was one of no mercy and it intended to finish them off in the most brutal way possible.
Silver’s expression was one of alarm, but Anakin didn’t seem afraid. He spun his lightsaber in the air and sliced through the first opponent with speed that only the most trained fighters could master. It fell to the ground instantly as it was no match for the glowing blade that had just punctured its insides. His eyes reflected anger as he leapt into the air and did a backflip, kicking another one in the chest. The zombie fell back, screeching with pain, before it was mercifully finished by a swift stab in the same area.
Emboldened, Silverstream followed his example and leapt at the next one, slicing it right through the empty eye socket. The creature screamed as purple blood began to leak out of it, grabbing its face and holding on. She used this opportunity to kick it in the head and send it stumbling. Jumping in, Katooni stabbed it in the chest, sending it collapsing to the ground in a pathetic pile of bones.
The three Jedi laughed together, living in the moment like they never had before. Katooni and Silverstream took down another one together and danced on the bones that were left. Silver then turned and ran at a fourth zombie that was coming near. This one was smarter and charged at her back. The two blades collided in an instant and were locked in an impossible stalemate, trying to see who would disarm the other first.
She screamed with rage, trying her hardest to disarm the zombie unicorn. It snarled with fury and pushed her back a couple of steps. Her sword began to slip and she began to fear that she had lost the fight already. However, that was when her opponent made a fatal mistake. It began to get distracted by looking at the fallen remains of its comrade. Silver used this opportunity to knock it back, surprising it. Before it could react, she sliced through its heart with a victorious battle cry.
Above the battlefield, Discord launched himself into the air, smiling mischievously to himself. He hadn’t felt this alive in hundreds of years. This was pure chaos to indulge in, and he intended to live every moment of it. With a snap of his fingers, a horde of about 70 zombies were instantly turned into tiny Easter eggs, which fell to the ground and shattered. Another snap and it was raining acid chocolate rain, instantly disintegrating another horde into nothing. All while this was happening, he laughed with unfiltered joy.
He now understood what Izzy meant about enjoying life. He was now free and unbound by any mortal law. It was just him and chaos by his side, and chaos was his #1 ally.
“It’s Discordin time!” Discord announced merrily. Without a second thought, he then proceeded to Discord all over the zombies, causing them to scream and disintegrate into ash. He never wanted this moment to end. He was having too much fun.
Beside him, Twilight and Opaline combined their powers together and blasted through the next horde of zombies. Blasts of pink and purple magic tore through the battlefield, burning any unfortunate opponents that came near.
Back on the ground, Vanellope von Schweetz watched all of this go down with tears of joy streaming down her face. This was a dream come true for her and she was witnessing history.
“Whoa!” she cried. “This is the coolest, most anime thing that's ever happened to me.” She grinned mischievously. “I'm so happy to be able to fight by your side!”
With that, she leapt into action, glitching through multiple hordes of zombies and taking them all down one by one. They bumped into one another as they passed and she used the opportunity to quickly slice them both in half at once with two swords before moving on to her next target.
She ran towards an escaping zombie and grabbed it by the tail. The zombie howled and shrieked as she yanked on it, showing no mercy to the undead creature.
“Nat 20, stink brain!” she exclaimed as she dropped a sugar bomb from Sugar Rush onto its back. The zombie exploded into a billion candy canes, all raining down onto the ground from the sky.
Meanwhile, Mare used the distraction to run through the retreating hordes and towards the entrance to the lair. The wind blew her mane back as she did so. Thankfully, the door was left open and she leapt inside, locking it behind her.
Hawk Nightwing ran and ran, headed to no particular destination. He just needed some time alone to reflect. After seeing Mare and Misty randomly appear out of nowhere and forcing him to relive all of his trauma, he needed to be alone, both for his sake and for others.
He ran deep into a forest of tropical trees where he stopped by a stream of water. Seeing something on the bottom, he reached down and picked it up. It was a badge of Sunny Starscout’s cutie mark with the words: HOOF TO HEART written on it.
“Sunny…are you there?” Hawk asked. He knew it was useless. Sunny wasn’t real, and even if she was, he hadn’t really made many substantial stories all about her aside from one, even though she was his favorite pony. He had also shut himself off from defending G5 long ago. She wouldn’t be interested in him. Just as he was about to give up hope, he heard a voice:
“You’re a long ways away from home.”
He looked to his left and there was the shimmering apparition of none other than Sunny herself, standing in front of a palm tree, munching on some coconuts.
“Sunny!!” Hawk exclaimed in shock. “You’re real too?!” He sighed. “I guess I should’ve known that. I don’t even know what is impossible anymore.”
“What are you doing?” asked Sunny, sensing he was hiding something deep within himself.
“I can’t go back and face them,” Hawk told her, “Not after I abandoned everyone, which resulted in this war. Mare means well, but she’ll never understand. It’s just…too late for me now.”
“Is it ?” Sunny challenged him gently. “Or is that just what you tell yourself? You know better than to cut yourself off from everything you’ve worked for. You know I nearly did that .” She walked over to him and sat beside him on the ground.
“Yeah, but you were stronger than I am,” Hawk countered sadly. “You faced down your whole community when they didn’t believe you, Opaline…and what have I done in comparison? Not nearly enough. All I ever do is screw up.”
“That’s because you don’t trust yourself ,” Sunny said, her eyes sparkling with that sort of radiant warmth that only she possessed. “You’ve told your audience that you’ve changed from those early days, but you don’t really believe it yourself, do you? A part of you is afraid you’ll screw up again .”
Through tears, Hawk nodded.
“I know what that’s like ,” Sunny admitted. “I know what it’s like to have such a massive weight on your shoulders…to desire to be an inspiration. But you buckle under the weight of that, feeling like you’ll never be good enough. And the truth is that to some, you might not be enough. Change might not be enough. I struggled with that for the longest time and I felt alone, thinking that the ponies of Maretime Bay were right about me. Then I learned that I'm only alone if I keep all my worries to myself. But if I share my worries with ponies who care, they will always be there for me.”
“You’re saying…all those stories that I abandoned…all those characters…my fans…they’ll forgive me?” Hawk asked.
“I can’t say anything for sure ,” Sunny told him, reaching a comforting hoof out. “But what I do know is that sometimes, ponies make mistakes. But it’s what we do in the end that counts. You have changed. Strength and mastery are both important, Hawk. But weakness…folly…failure, also. Failure is our greatest teacher. I grew as a pony by making mistakes and choosing to learn from them . And my advice is that you shouldn’t be afraid of doing the same .”
Hawk sniffled, wiping the tears from his eyes. “Thanks, Sunny. You…always know how to make me feel better, even as a toy.”
Sunny giggled. “You got like a dozen of me back home, don’t you ?”
Hawk nodded back, not embarrassed to admit his favoritism. “Yeah. You do help motivate me to keep going in more ways than one.”
“Well I’m glad that I can help ,” Sunny replied with a warm smile. “All stories deserve their ending. And we’ll do our part -“
“H oof t o hea rt…” both of them said in unison, enjoying the warm summer air together.
Mare burst through the doors of the laboratory room, which had somehow been rebuilt. She looked around for a little bit before finding the Time Reverse-inator sitting atop of the operating table. It was there like it had never been picked up at all, in the exact same orientation.
She was confused as to how this could be, but she didn’t have time to dwell on that. The room shook and rumbled as the battle took place outside. She had to hurry. Edgelord would be back at any moment and discover that she was there.
Wasting no time, she picked up the device with her hoof and put it around her neck. Right as she did that, however, the lair shook on all sides, nearly knocking her off balance. Quick as a flash, she bolted through the halls as an angry growl sounded all around her, echoing throughout the vicinity.
“YOU HAVE STOPPED NOTHING !!!!!!” Edgelord’s voice boomed loudly. “THIS AMULET BELONGS TO ME!!!!! ”
Mare gasped and continued running towards the exit, feeling the dark magic tug on the amulet in an attempt to yank it away from her. She held it close to her as she continued on, for she wasn’t about to be deterred. The lair shook and spun around in circles, threatening to force her to drop it. But she was anticipating his move this time.
Without missing a beat, she planted both of her front hooves firmly on the ground to support herself, even as everything began collapsing around her. With a loud yell, she jumped out the nearest window and grew her unicorn horn to blast a spiral staircase into existence. She leapt on top of it and began her descent downwards.
Back on the ground, the combined armies finished clearing out the zombies. Misty and Young Clementine stabbed the last one together and stopped to catch their breaths. The battle was far from over, but at least they got a reprieve for the moment.
“What do we do now?!” the girl asked her in a panicked voice.
“There’s not much we can do,” Misty replied. “Except wait for Mare to come back. If she does…” She swallowed hard. “I’m worried about her.”
Just then, there was the sound of evil laughter and a bunch of shadowy clouds collected in the sky to reveal none other than Prince Edgelord himself, flying triumphantly above everyone else.
“There he is!” Amanda shouted, her eyes wide with terror. “I can’t take it!” She ran away from the battlefield as fast as she could, only to be stopped in place by a powerful force and forced onto her knees. She cried out in pain as this was happening, the dark alicorn smiling sadistically.
“MY FUTURE SUBJECTS !!!!!” Edgelord addressed them menacingly, using the time to drain the energy out of the girl, who collapsed onto the ground, moaning. He then began to grow increasingly larger in size, this repeating with the more power he accumulated. He was winning and there was no one in sight who could stop him.
Meanwhile, Mare was running down the spiral staircase as carefully, but quickly as she could. She saw what was happening down below and picked up the pace. She had to get down there. She couldn’t let all of her friends get their life essences drained. She would not fail. She wouldn’t.
The amulet began to sparkle with dark energy the closer she got to where Edgelord was. The power called to her once again, silently begging her to return it to him. She didn’t listen this time though. She was too smart. She would not allow herself to be fooled this time.
“FROM NOW ON, THERE WILL BE NO MORE HEROES EVER AGAIN !!!” Edgelord gloated. “IN FACT, THERE WILL BE NO MORE HOPES, NO MORE DREAMS!! AND NO ESCAPE!! NO CHANCE TO RISE UP!!! ” The crowd below him screamed as their essences were drained and absorbed into the shadowy alicorn. “YOU. ARE. NOTHING!!!!!! ”
“Hey, bozo!” Mare yelled out, interrupting his torturous tirade.
Edgelord turned towards her, and so did the people below. He gasped once he saw what was around her neck. “YOU…FOOLISH PONY!! YOU WILL NOT DEFY ME !!!!!”
“I got the Time Reverse-inator!” Mare declared. “Your reign of terror is at an end!!”
Edgelord growled. “THAT IS MINE !!!!!” He leapt forward and made a beeline towards her. The people below screamed as he did so. He was out for her blood now, and he was going to destroy her in front of everyone. He opened his mouth wide, displaying his sharp teeth.
Right as he did that, Mare slipped and began to fall off of the staircase, towards her death. She screamed, the amulet being snatched from around her neck. She flailed desperately in the air trying to grab it to no avail.
“MARE!!!” Misty shrieked at the top of her lungs, looking away in fear.
Fortunately, it was then that Hawk finally landed on the battlefield and got to bear witness to the events that were transpiring. Through uncertain eyes, he saw Mare fall through the air, trying her hardest to reach for the amulet. Out of instinct, he spread his wings out wide. In that moment, he knew he had to make a choice. Sunny had been right. With all that he had been gifted, there was no happy ending without him.
And right as Mare was about to meet her end, Misty picked up Hawk and threw him at her as hard as she could. Before Edgelord could blink, the mare he had been about to kill was gone from sight. He looked around frantically for her, snarling in anger.
Mare opened her eyes and found that she was on the back of none other than Hawk himself, who was flying in the air and holding the Time Reverse-inator in his free hoof. His face reflected confidence and firm determination as he took her to safety. He had been spiritually reborn, like a phoenix rising from the ashes. There was only steady resolution as he looked down at the sight of the characters he had used for years.
Down below, the armies were shocked at the sight of their author having returned. They all chattered amongst themselves and gazed at this with a mix of awe and trepidation.
“Whoa…”
“Oh my God!”
“Who is that?”
“Behold!” Lee shouted over the crowd, his face reflecting that of pure joy. “It’s Hawk Nightwing, our author!! He’s come back!!”
Hawk landed on the ground in a superhero pose beside June and Clementine and gently set Mare back down onto the ground. He faced his creations proudly, no longer being afraid of them. They had fought well for his name, and now it was time for him to make them proud.
“All stories deserve their ending!!” he declared, his voice reverberating all around the battlefield so that everybody could hear. “And I think it’s time I give this story its own!!”
Everyone cheered as Hawk grabbed a parchment of paper and began writing in it with a pencil: AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
With that, the armies all joined hands and hooves in unison, expelling positive energy from their bodies one by one. The love and light from them was overwhelming and illuminated the battlefield as it traveled from their occupants into the Time Reverse-inator.
Edgelord saw this happen and was enraged. This couldn’t be happening! He yelled as this was taking place, completely powerless to do anything about it.
“What?!” he demanded. “No!! NO!! STOP !!!!”
The energy from the people present was sucked into the amulet, which then glowed and shimmered with the new fuel it was given. The energy was then released back out in the form of power, undoing all the damage caused by the battle and restoring the lands around the lair back to its former glory.
“Look!” Minuette exclaimed, pointing towards the ground beneath her as grass began to grow where a dead ground used to be.
A blast of magic then shot through the sky, clearing away the redness and the storm clouds and revealing the beautiful sunshine hidden underneath it all. The energy then continued to grow larger and larger until it headed straight for Edgelord. In just mere moments, he was being incinerated alive by the power as it tore away at his very being.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!” he screamed, with those being his last words as he was blown into tiny pieces, which were then scattered off into the distance in many different directions, never to be seen again.
With him gone, everything from the lair to the surrounding lands were purified, with the magic spreading out into different worlds and reversing the damage caused to them as well. Soon, it was done and the power faded away into nothingness.
The battle was over. The amulet dropped to the ground lifelessly in many halves and Hawk picked it up, examining it closely. He then checked over the many survivors and ensured that they were okay. Many were in awe at the sight of their creator, so much in fact that they couldn’t speak. He accepted this though, and then turned his attention over to Mare.
He walked over and stood over her. She bowed down to him as he approached, a gesture that he wasn’t quite entirely used to. But he knew that he was revered as a god amongst his creations, even though he didn’t feel like one at all. Such were things that he had to live with. He did his best to pretend like he was conducting professional business at first.
“I’ve heard a great deal about you, Mare,” Hawk stated in a pretend matter-of-fact tone. “You defied the rules of your story, teamed up with a villain, invaded multiple other worlds, destroyed them, interacted with other characters, even met your creator! AND…” He waited until she was fully terrified to pull the rug out from under her. “You have saved us all.”
Mare looked up in surprise, expecting something else. That was when he bowed respectfully to her. Misty then followed suit, leading the others to do the same. Soon, everyone was bowing to her and offering their respect towards the pony who had saved them. It was a feeling she never thought she would ever get, actual acknowledgment from others. The knowledge that she had done something good and worthwhile. She had brought honor to her fellow characters, and it felt liberating.
She finally got to be the hero without being a joke in the process. It was all she ever wanted, the feeling of being special and like she had done something positive for her community. She couldn’t believe that she had finally accomplished her dream, and after all these years…she finally felt like herself.
“I think it’s time you take us home, wouldn’t you say?” Hawk suggested kindly, winking at her. “I say I should make some more happy endings.”
Mare’s heart leapt at that. “Of course. I’ll just…” she shuffled about awkwardly before she blasted a massive portal in the sky, to which all of the other characters flocked towards.
They said their goodbyes to her one by one as they disappeared from sight. Misty was the last to leave and she gave her a reassuring smile, indicating that she was returning to her world with a new mindset and outlook on life. Mare had changed her life as much as she did the others, and that one look reflected that.
She disappeared through the portal, which then closed after her. Mare took a deep breath, satisfied that she had served her true purpose at last. She accepted that she was now a part of this new world and that she would never find her way back to her old timeline. But that was okay. She had done something far greater here than she had ever done there, and she was fine with that.
But just as she was about to accept her new life, the world around her began to crumble and close in on her and she blacked out.
The Malevolent Multiversal Misadventures of Mare (April Fools 2024 Special)
Epilogue: How The Story Ends
Mare opened her eyes again and found herself back in the throne room of Canterlot Castle, right at the moment she was about to use the Generic MacGuffin to defeat Villain. This was the exact point where the timeline diverged and she had a chance to make things right now. A spear was pointed at her throat and she should’ve been afraid. But she wasn’t this time. She knew exactly what she needed to do, and her experiences had changed her for the better.
“I know you’re angry, Villain!” Mare told her, carefully getting to her hooves. “I understand you and I know what you’re going through! But I do know you can’t do this! I’ve seen where this leads and so have you!”
“I only know what I want!” Villain shot back. “Who knows what will really happen until I try it?!”
“I’ve seen it many times!” Mare insisted. “Things don’t turn out well in Equestria without the Magic of Friendship to guide it!”
“Ugh, what’s so special about friendship ?!” demanded Villain angrily. “How is that in any way stronger than the power of the dark side?!”
“The difference is that friendship is about forming connections and making others happy!” Mare explained desperately.
“No one ever wanted to be my friend!” Villain yelled. “No matter how hard I tried growing up! HOW CAN I BE SURE THAT IT WON’T HAPPEN AGAIN?!” Tears of anger and sadness filled her eyes.
“You don’t know!” Mare admitted. She walked up to her slowly and relayed the lesson she had learned over the course of her journey. “But that’s the thing! You don’t know until you give it a try! I spent many days being alone, forced to do the bidding of someone else. But…I survived all of that! I found friends, allies who would stand by my side in battle, and be there whenever I needed help! And I know you can do that too!”
While she was saying this, Villain’s anger facade crumbled and her true vulnerable self took over. This pony understood her. She was empathizing with her. This was a feeling she had never felt throughout her entire life, and she didn’t know what to say as a rebuttal. The truth was that she didn’t have any. Mare was right, and she knew it.
“How do I know they won’t all end the same way…?” Villain asked her through tears.
“I guess it's up to you to make sure they don't.” Mare answered, offering her hoof out to her. Villain hesitated for a moment, but then grasped it anyway. The two of them embraced one another as a blast of magic headed up to the Moon and released Twilight and the others.
The doors to the throne room burst open and the Mane 6 ran in, ready to fight. Villain seemed to know what they were here for, and she walked in their direction, finally owning up to what she did. She apologized for everything she had done and that she didn’t expect them to forgive her.
Now this is normally where I would pull the cliché, “all is forgiven” redemption trope that we’re all so tired of, right? Well, not this time! This is a real story and I’m not about to bore you with that kiddie stuff. So instead, she got this.
“We’re glad that you’ve finally understood the gravity of your mistakes,” Twilight said kindly. But then her face darkened. “That being said, you still need to face the consequences of your actions.” She then yanked Villain off the floor with her magic and held her in a chokehold.
“I-WHAT?!” Villain gasped.
“We don’t forgive you!” Rainbow Dash shouted angrily.
“No no no no no no no no no no!” Villain begged, realizing what was happening to her. “Please, no-“
“ONE THOUSAND YEARS IN FRIENDSHIP PRISON!!!!” Applejack ordered. “Case closed!” She stomped her hoof on the ground like a gavel.
And so, Villain was sent away to Friendship Prison and the day was saved. Mare was made to be Twilight’s new apprentice and as her second act of showing that she was a changed pony, she even decided to spend some time with Bear back at the house because Luna knows the poor stuffed animal needs it. Snake was even invited over for a tea party, to which he happily accepted. Yay for Mare learning a lesson in basic equine decency!
And they all lived happily ever after.
Soooooo…THE END!
Author's Note
APRIL FOOLS!!
Comments are appreciated, pls.
