do you like starlight glim-glim?

by Mica

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, My Little Pony: A New Generation, Other, Starlight Glimmer, Romance, Sex, Random, Crossover, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1124

do you like starlight glim-glim? i do not like her, senpai-i-simp. (a poem)

fun fact: if you say senpai many times fast, it will start to sound to like "i simp".

senpai simp i
i simp senpai
senpai i simp

that senpai-i-simp! that senpai-i-simp! i do not like that senpai-i-simp!

Disclaimer and notice to moderators: This work is decapitalized for artistic effect.
Additional tags: poetry, cringe, ruining innocent children's stories, because that's what the brony fandom is all about, lolz

Published 2024-01-20 23:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-01-20 23:10:01 UTC

mare reader's version

i simp senpai
senpai i simp

that senpai-i-simp! that senpai-i-simp! i do not like that senpai-i-simp!

do you like big macintosh?

i do not like him, senpai-i-simp!
i do not like big macintosh.

would you like big mac here or there?

i do not like him here or there.
i do not like him anywhere.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like him, senpai-i-simp.

would you like, then, sheriff hitch?
would you scratch his bylaw itch?

i do not like that sheriff hitch.
i do not like his dragon witch.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

would you eat out king sombra's plot?
aren't baddie kings just super hot?

i do not like king sombra’s plot.
i don’t like villains twilight fought.
i do not like that sheriff hitch.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

would you? could you? kiss shining armor?
kiss him quietly in the parlor!

i do not like shining armor.
he’s married, and has a daughter.

you may like flash sentry, you’ll see.
he’ll play guitar for you for free!

i would not, could not, like that “Brad”.
not shining armor! that’s just sad.
i would not like king sombra’s plot.
i do not like that sheriff hitch.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

sprout! sprout! ex-sheriff sprout!
would you make out with ex-sheriff sprout?

not mommy’s boys! not flash sentry!
not daddy-toys! just let me be!
i would not like king sombra’s plot.
i do not like that sheriff hitch.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

say, how about soarin, his fur’s so soft!
do you think that soarin is hot?

i do not think that soarin’s hot.

but you do not like senpai-i-simp?

no, i do not like senpai-i-simp!

could you, would you, with sunburst?
i would not, could not with sunburst!

could you, would you, with braeburn?
i would not, could not with braeburn!

i could not, would not, with sunburst.
i will not, will not with braeburn.
i do not think that soarin's hot.
not that sprout! not flash sentry!
not shining armor! let me be!
i would not like king sombra’s plot.
i do not like that sheriff hitch.
i do not like big mac one bit.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

you do not like them, so you say!
try me! try me! you may be gay!
try me and you may be, i say.

(...and she tries senpai-i-simp...)

say! i do like senpai-i-simp!
i like her way more than sunburst!
i like her way more than braeburn!
she’s better than soarin’, he’s just plain borin'.
i like her more than flash sentry!
i like senpai-i-simp, now I see!
i like her more than shining armor,
i kiss her every day in the parlor.
i like her mane that’s super soft,
i like her, and i’ll never stop!
i like her more than sheriff hitch,
i like her and love her to bits.
she’s even stronger than big mac,
she beats the stallions on the track.
i will like senpai here or there.
i will like senpai anywhere.
i do so like senpai-i-simp!
thank you, thank you, senpai-i-simp.

Author's Note

fun fact green eggs and ham was my favorite book as a child

stallion reader's version

i simp senpai

senpai i simp

that senpai-i-simp! that senpai-i-simp! i do not like that senpai-i-simp!

do you like starlight glim-glim?

i do not like her, senpai-i-simp!
i do not like starlight glim-glim.

would you like starlight here or there?

i do not like her here or there.
i do not like her anywhere.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.
i do not like her, senpai-i-simp.

then would you like sunset shimmer?
do you think that she’s a winner?

i do not like sunset shim-shim.
she gets so angry on a whim.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

would you eat out queen haven's plot?
aren't older mares just super hot?

i do not like queen haven's plot.
i do not like pretentious snobs.
i do not like sunset shim-shim.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.

i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

would you? could you? kiss marble pie's cheek?
kiss her! kiss her! she doesn't speak.

i do not like marble pie's cheek.
i do not like mares who just squeak.

you may like fluttershy, you’ll see.
you know, she'd like to be a tree!?

i would not, could not, kiss a tree.
not marble pie! just let me be.
i would not like queen haven's plot.
i do not like sunset shim-shim.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

dashie! dashie! dashie! dashie!
could you, would you, with rainbow, please?

not miss dashie! not fluttertree!
not mute ponies! let me be!
i would not like queen haven's plot.
i do not like sunset shim-shim.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

say, rarity! her mane's so soft!
do you think that rarity is hot?

i do not think rarity is hot.

but you do not like senpai-i-simp?

no, i do not like senpai-i-simp!

could you, would you, with trixie?
i would not, could not with trixie!

could you, would you, with pinkie?
i would not, could not with pinkie!

i could not, would not, with trixie.
i will not, will not, with pinkie.
don’t call rarity hot, i think that she is not.
not miss dashie! not fluttershy!
not marble pie! they're not that fine!
i would not like queen haven's plot.
i do not like sunset shim-shim.
i do not like starlight glim-glim.
i do not like them, senpai-i-simp.

you do not like them, so you say!
try me! try me! you may be gay!
try me and you may be, i say.

(...and he tries senpai-i-simp...)

say! i do like senpai-i-simp!
i like him way more than trixie!
i like him way more than pinkie!
his charm’s truly a rarity!
i like senpai-i-simp, now i see!
i like him more than rainbow dash!
he's better than that piece of trash.
he's live and kicking, unlike fluttershee,
he's even harder than a tree.
i will kiss senpai on the cheek.
unlike some mares, he loves to speak.
i will eat out his juicy plot.
he'll always let me, he's not a snob.
he's hotter than sunset shim-shim,
he's cuter than starlight glim-glim.
i will like senpai here or there.
i will like senpai anywhere.
i do so like senpai-i-simp!
thank you, thank you, senpai-i-simp.