Derpy's Eye

by </^\>

Rating: everyone
Tags: Derpy Hooves, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 1917

Cupcakes related.

Quote me on this: "it's a blarp."

...or, you know, just a half baked idea written in half a night.

Published 2011-08-19 03:27:11 UTC
Last updated 2011-08-19 03:51:30 UTC

Derpy's Eye

The following is based on BitcCloud’s take on Cupcakes : http://bitccloud.deviantart.com/art/Cupcakes-2-210509853?q=gallery%3Abitccloud%2F30204205&qo=7

Derpy’s Eye
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"…You know, it's pretty rude to keep your eyes closed." Derpy heard the clang of metal as Pinkie selected a new instrument. "I mean, I'm just trying to have a friendly conversation and you're acting like you're blind!" Derpy could feel Pinkie leaning against her chest.

"Am I ugly? Is that it? Or maybe you don't like the decorations, hm?" Derpy felt cold steel tracing shapes on the surface of her cheek. "Well?" Pinkie pressed the sharp point into Derpy's flesh, blood began oozing out instantly.

Afraid Derpy answered "The decorations!" She clenched her eyes even tighter afraid of another stab or cut from Pinkie. None came.

Finally after a short pause Pinkie said "I'll have you know I put a lot of work into these decorations!" Pinkie forced open one of Derpy's eyelids. "But if you don't like them then I guess you wont be needing these."

Pinkie forced a metal spoon into the corner of Derpy's eye. A thin Squirt of blood shot out and Derpy screamed. She began writhing as hard as she could against her restraints as the spoon went deeper. snapping muscle and nerves. Derpy could feel the metal scraping against the bone of her eye sockets. Derpy's tears were mixing with the blood and streamed down her face. Derpy's face was on fire as the spoon severed her optic nerve. A sickening sound of suction filled Derpy's ears as her eye was removed completely. Distorted screams and sobs filled the dark room.

"You know I haven't had one of these before." Mused Pinkie as she popped the eye in her mouth and began chewing. With her mouth still full she continued talking "A liwtle chewy, but ish prewwy gewd." Her words almost inaudible through the thick smacking sound the eye made as she chewed it.

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Derpy could only feel the intense pain that came from her eye socket. It hurt so much that she could barely hear the sounds of her detached eye being chewed to pieces. She wanted so badly to bring her hoof down to hold her face, to protect what was left of the hole in her head. Derpy pulled as hard as she could on the restraints in vein. The cuts in her arms grew deeper with every tug at the frame. Every second seemed to bring more agony, but she still had to try.

A swallowing sound signaled that Pinkie had finished with the first eye ball. “I should make some eye dumplings some day! No pony should miss out on this!” She raised the spoon again and brought it closer to Derpy’s face.

Time seemed to slow for the mare trapped on the metal rack. A few thoughts ran through her head as the spoon filled her vision. The thought of not having eyes anymore was a pretty scary thought. She wouldn’t be able to read the post cards, or see the sunset. She wouldn’t ever see her little muffin anymore. To see that smile that brought an identical one to her face, or to watch her grow up.

Sadness welled up in Derpy’s throat as her new thoughts arose. If she died today, Dinky would be alone, and motherless. But Derpy couldn’t let that happen. She had to be there for her daughter. Nothing could keep her from leaving her little muffin. Not even death.

“No.” she muttered, pulling harder on the frame. “No! No!!” she repeated again as the spoon came closer still. She shut her eye in concentration as she pulled for dear life against the restraints. She could feel the sharp edge of the spoon dig into the corner of her occupied eye socket. She shouted loudly, her shriek resembled a wild dog lashing out after being backed up into a corner.

Suddenly the restraints stopped resisting Derpy’s desperate pull. Her hooves came down on Pinkie’s shoulders hard causing her to collapse under the force, paralyzed for a moment. Just enough time for Derpy to free her head from the frame and let her body fall towards Pinkie’s on the ground. As she did, she landed a well-placed hoof on the murderer’s chest, knocking the wind out of her.

“Give me my eye back!” she shouted into Pinkie’s face. Though, she was struggling for breath, the pink mare tried to reach for the spoon that she had dropped on the way down. “Give it to me NOW!!!” Derpy shouted.

The air came rushing back into Pinkie’s lungs as she finally was able to find her breath again. She coughed a few times before rasping “It’s too late, you silly filly! I already ate it, remember?” Derpy just glared at her with her single eye. “I swear Derps, you can be so weird sometimes.”

Derpy delivered a swift punch to Pinkie’s gut, knocking the wind out of her again. Two more punches landed in the same place causing the pink mare’s intestine to react. Two coughs came out of Pinkie before she spat out a glob of white and amber-yellow onto Derpy’s face.

Derpy wiped the mess off of her face with a hoof in disgust. After examining it, however, she determined that it was indeed her eye ball, or perhaps what was left of it. Confident that Pinkie was still unable to move, she shifted her weight to free up her front hooves. She started clumping the mass together until it became a condensed form. She then proceeded to roll the form until it became more ball like. Though, it looked like a congealed mess of vomit and egg stuff, it was, for the most part, back to its original form. She admired her handy work for a few moments, turning the ball this way and that. Completely satisfied, she proceeded to stuff the thing into her empty eye socket. Much to her luck, it fit pretty snugly, staying firm in the hole.

“I take it back” Pinkie groaned “you’re not weird, you’re crazy” Derpy ignored her comment, focusing on undoing the clamps on her hind legs. “This town’s not big enough for two crazy mares…”

She was lucky enough to hear Pinkie’s threat, and moved her head to the side as a spoon cut through the empty air. She looked up and saw the pink mare clutching her abdomen while once again swinging the spoon towards her captive. This time it struck Derpy’s head on the crown, causing her focus to dissipate. She brought her fore hooves to grasp her head. In doing so, her arm collided with Pinkie’s and her weapon was thrown across the room.

“Oh, Come on! That’s not fair!” Pinkie shouted. Before she could complain any further, her head was held firmly by a pair of hooves. Derpy’s head came down on Pinkie’s and knocked her out. Derpy let the pink mare slid out of her hooves, and focused her attention once more on the iron clamps that were still held in place.

She grumbled as she finally broke free. This had been a really bad day for Derpy. On top of running into a tree and missing half of her daily route, she just had to be kidnapped by some crazy pony, who was disguised as a crazy pony, had her cutie marks cut off, as well as have one of her eyes cut out. As if destroying her identity wasn’t enough! She moved to the cart where the flaps of her hide lay. She picked one up, looking at the envelope cutie mark as memories of her days as a young mail carrier became vivid. A tear flowed out of her working eye. The skin might grow back, but her mark wouldn’t be the same. She wouldn’t have the mark of a mail mare.

She took the other flap of skin and made her way to the doorway. She didn’t want to spend another second in this Celestia forsaken place.

“I’m sorry, Derpy, but I can’t let you do that.” Derpy stopped in front of the door, glaring at the wood. The other mare came closer, undoubtedly, knife in hoof. “We have to finish this party. Stay awhile, have some cupcakes, rest for a little bit.” Pinkie was right behind her now. “Nopony needs to worry over one missing mare,” her voice filled with menace, “or perhaps the entire town!”

Pinkie’s mouth was abruptly filled with a grey hoof. Derpy brought her face right up to Pinkie’s.

“Look here, ‘party mare,’ you might be able to just have fun all the time, but some of us have things to do. I’m already behind schedule. Do you have any idea what it’s like to have the entire town coming to your door step because of a few late letters? They rip you to pieces! They eat your eyes and cut off your ass!” she shouted the last sentence, rage dripping from her words, “So, before you even think about pulling this kind of thing on me, think again!” She glared into Pinkie’s eyes, receiving a similar look back, but softer. The two stayed stared at each other, each refusing to take their eyes off of the other. That is, until Derpy’s destroyed eye rolled in her head, independent of her good eye. Pinkie shrunk back a little, but her expression was mostly unbroken. “The same goes for Dinky” Derpy said at length “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some mail to deliver.” She turned back towards the door. “…And an eye to fix…” The door opened wide, letting a bright light flood into the darkened room. Derpy stepped forward into the light, muttering one last thing.

“Confound these ponies…”

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“Mama! Mama!!” Dinky shouted, trying to get her mother’s attention. “Wake up Mama!”

Derpy had shook herself from the memory induced trance she was in. Her cheeks flushed in her embarrassment as she realized how long she was distracted. “I’m sorry, Muffin, what did you say?”

“Mama!” Dinky shouted in annoyence “I asked you about your eye! Why does it move so weird?”

As if on cue one of her eyes rolled in a different direction, ignoring the focal point of the conversation. She had gotten used to the odd feeling of the glass replacement rolling around in her head, but she still wasn’t used to the reactions it got from everypony else.

Her memories flooded her mind once more. She looked at her flank, where a newly adorned mark lay; 7 bubbles in a sort of column. Derpy missed her old cutie mark, but this one would do. Besides, Dinky loved bubbles, and Derpy loved Dinky. But remembering her old flank brought back one specific memory in all of her adventures. Since the event she hasn’t spoken a word to anypony. After all, she was used to crazy ponies all her life.

Her glass eye rolled again in her head, as though it were looking right at Dinky.

“It’s magic, my little Muffin. Magic and cupcakes…”

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Poetic metaphor for the term ‘Author’s Note’ goes here…
I know some of this sounds ridiculous or even unfair for Pinkie, but that’s just how this was rolling. BitcCloud had some ideas, and then I had some ideas. Sorry if you didn’t want your spring board stolen, Bit. I was just spit balling and adlibbing.

The story can be found at the top somewhere.

I don’t own My little pony, Cupcakes, BitcCloud (or his/her work), or any pastries.