Faded Leaves

by MellowSoul

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rainbow Dash, Sad, Other, Romance
Length: 9057

Rainbow begins rebuilding her life one sobering Halloween.

In her mid-20s, Rainbow's friends are gone, having moved on with their lives. She does what she can to maintain a positive outlook, but sometimes, the loneliness is overwhelming. All she has are memories and nostalgia to carry her through each day. Those, and the cathartic release of metal. Dedicated to making a positive impact in spite of her circumstances, she spends the holidays keeping herself occupied, showing kindness where she can. This is the story of her last, and greatest, love.

Published 2024-02-07 10:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-02-14 22:44:31 UTC

To Speak in Tongues

Author's Note

Chapter title came from Parkway Drive's song It's so Hard to Speak Without a Tongue. The story came from a 2016 movie called Boys in the Trees. It's basically like that with a heavy emphasis on depression and metal. The usual stuff.

To Speak in Tongues

October 26th, 2009. Rainbow trudged through the suburban neighborhood she'd lived in since birth. A light breeze echoed, rustling branches across the landscape. Dusk was starting to set in. The sky was mostly clear, clouds sparsely scattered between. She checked the watch under the sleeve of her jacket. The time read 5:30.

"Whole day went by so fast..."

The Pegasus strolled toward the park on the east side of town. She'd probably spend the rest of the day there until it got dark. She wasn't as active as she used to be, but she tried to maintain a relatively healthy routine. Working from home left few opportunities to get out during the day.

From a bench, Rainbow watched as the last families perused the area. Aside from the night shift, most were usually home after seven. It was a small town where everyone knew each other, though her years as a star athlete were little more than memories now. She was just normal, like everyone else, and that was okay.

"Rainbow? Rainbow Dash?"

The mare's ears perked up. The voice that spoke her name was unfamiliar. She couldn't recall the pitch from any point during her life. Looking aside, she was greeted by a stallion with green fur and glasses. His curly locks were a dark shade of brown. They were long enough to cover one eye, and partially cover the other.

"Sorry, uh...Do I know you...?"

"I doubt it. We never got the chance to talk at school. It's Noah - Noah Parker."

The name combined with his voice brought back memories of their yearbook. She recalled his picture from the class of 2002.

"I remember now! You were that nerdy kid! You graduated the same year as us, right!?"

"I used to watch during some of your games. Mind if I sit down?"

"Not at all. Could use the company, anyway."

Noah took the mare up on her offer. His presence brought back images of their glory days. It all seemed so long ago...

"Brings back memories doesn't it? I remember all the spots we used to hit up in town. Back then, I used to think things would never change. When they finally did...I realized how much I'd miss it..."

"Now you know why I never left."

"Are the others still here?"

"Naw. We all scattered after school ended. We don't really keep in touch much anymore. I still hear from Twilight on occasion - usually around this time of year. She got her PhD in Math this last summer."

"And the others?"

"Fluttershy's a vet now. Rarity's overseas last I knew. We all pretty much chose professions we were skilled at - everyone but me, that is."

"I thought it was weird I didn't see your name in the papers. What happened?"

"Lost interest. Went to a local community college on a scholarship. Partway through, my passion for sports just kind of...Went poof. I dated an aspiring Wonderbolt for a while, but we broke it off when things started to change. We split up on amicable terms, so I wasn't too upset about it."

"Man...I'm sorry. I know it's tough when you fall out of love with things and people that you used to."

"It's okay. I'm content with how things turned out. I moved on to working in the tech world and wrote a few books on the side."

"I know. I saw some of your comics where I live. I'm actually visiting for the holidays myself."

"How 'bout you? What are you up to these days?"

"Studied business in the metropolitan area for a while. Started a rock band with a few buddies from work there. Guess we play kind of a melo-death style from back in the day."

"Same here, except it's just me."

"You're recording by yourself? Impressive."

"I never released any of my stuff. Wanted it to be more personal, ya know?"

"Yeah. You seem a lot more mellow than the last time I saw you."

"I've been on my own the last couple years. Tried to move out as soon as I could so mom and dad could have their privacy."

"I know what you mean. Gotta be kind to the folks while they're still here."

"It's getting late. We should probably head back soon. Streets are dangerous at night."

"Yeah."

Noah got up, reaching into his pocket for a card with his number.

"I'll be in town until February. Maybe we could pick up coffee soon?"

Rainbow smiled. She accepted with a graceful composure unexpected by those she knew.

"Yeah. Just let me know when you're free."

Back home, Rainbow prepared dinner for the evening. While waiting, she looked over the card again. She'd always secretly had a thing for nerdy types, but was too embarrassed to admit it. In less than a decade, the world had changed so much. She knew in the future, face-to-face interaction would dwindle substantially. This small token of affection would be her ticket to something meaningful. He seemed like a nice enough guy.

After dinner, Rainbow headed back to her room. She lived far away from any of her neighbors, so she could jam and record without complaint. She looked over her album collection. There were styles in every genre ranging from metalcore to black metal. In her younger years, she'd been obsessed with horror movies and the gothic vampire aesthetic. As she grew older, they fell by the wayside for something more true - more honest. She pulled a CD off the shelf, popping it into her computer's disc drive. At the time, Windows 7 was basically new. Rainbow let herself become lost in the melodies. Crawling toward her bed, she closed her eyes, and the world fell into darkness...

For the next couple days, Rainbow shopped around town, gathering what last-minute items she needed for Halloween. The children in town viewed her as the cool aunt who gave out the best treats. She always had a few candy bars on hoof when they traveled her way. Out of all the holidays, it was her personal favorite. On the morning of the 29th, she called Noah to schedule lunch. They met up at a local book store for coffee and confections. It reminded Rainbow of Pinkie's baking business. Out of all her former friends, they'd been the closest.

"This is a nice place. Wasn't here when I left, so I guess it's relatively new."

"Opened a few years ago around '06. It was fairly popular with emo kids for a while. That only lasted for the first year, though."

"Speaking of which, I noticed you grew your mane out a bit. Looked like you were going for a mix of metal and emo styles. Looks good."

"I'm a lot more of an open book than I used to be - no pun intended."

"I didn't say anything the other day because I didn't want to invade your personal space, but you seemed sad when we were talking. I had a few guesses why, but nothing concrete. Is everything okay?"

"It's just the post-teenage blues. Growing up sucks. I doubt anyone would dispute that."

"I know it's hard to open up when you're feeling down, especially with the medical system being the way it is, but if you ever feel like talking, you can always hit me up. I'm here if you need someone to talk to."

"I appreciate it, but I'm okay. I felt better just talking with you for a bit. Communication with another living entity took some of the weight off my shoulders."

"I'm glad. I know social interaction's hard to come by these days."

"We're heading into a tech-oriented future. I'm savoring what's left while I can."

"Best you can do, right?"

"Right."

"I'm off for a few days if you wanna hang out. I know there's not much to do, but..."

"Why don't you come back to my place? I know your family's probably smothering you while they can. It's a lot more relaxed where I am."

"I mean...If you're comfortable with it. I wouldn't wanna impose."

"It's no problem. Really. I insist."

"All right."

The pair finished their food, heading back to the Pegasus's abode. The walk was longer than Noah expected. He was surprised anyone lived so far out.

"This is the place."

"No wonder you've calmed down. It's peaceful here."

"It's far enough away from town to avoid disturbing the neighbors. It gets pretty loud during recording sessions."

"I can imagine."

Rainbow unlocked the door, showing her companion the structure within. The light was fairly dim, with only one window by the kitchen.

"It's pretty small, all things considered, but feel free to make yourself at home."

"It's a nice place. I can see why you'd stay here."

"Why don't you pick out a movie? I'll fix us some popcorn and soda."

"Sure. sounds good."

Rainbow pointed toward the drawer under the TV. Noah looked through her DVD collection while she prepared the snacks. Most of her catalog still consisted of horror, but it was more story-driven. The violence was kept to a minimum in favor of intriguing and creative narratives.

"I've got a few flavors. You want Coke, Pepsi, or Mountain Dew?"

"Coke sounds good."

Rainbow pulled everything together, tossing in a few packs of red vines for good measure. To Noah's surprise, she jumped over the couch, like a superhero swooping in to save the day. It was his first clue there was more to her than met the eye.

"Holy cow!"

"Surprised?"

"Well, yeah! I've never see anything like that before!"

"I kept up with my training after college. Thought I could help people if I stayed in shape. I've prevented my fair share of tragedies over the years."

"Whoa..."

Rainbow smiled again. She didn't like showing off as much these days, but for Noah, she made an exception.

"Well? You gonna start the movie?"

"Oh...Uh...Yeah..."

Noah turned back, his face still frozen in shock. For the next hour and a half, he couldn't get Rainbow out of his mind. Who was she? Where had she come from? Why did his heart skip a beat at a glimpse of her power...?

"Rainbow...Who are you...?"

Laurelei

Author's Note

I thought it might help to explain why the story's so different from the typical pony stuff. I wanted to try something that broke the rules in a meaningful way to create a sense of realism. In a modern setting especially, it makes sense some of the characters' personality traits would be different, but their core characteristics are still intact. They're just more complex and nuanced. I figured if grimdark could make them spooky and scary, I could go another direction and alter them for other purposes. Think of it as a mix of our world and theirs without as many of the over-the-top aspects.

Laurelei

After the movie, Rainbow offered to walk Noah home. He accepted, using the last of what time he had to make small talk. The glare of the sun summoned bittersweet memories within.

"So you said you dated an aspiring Wonderbolt for a while? What was his name?"

"Why? You jealous?"

"Just curious. I really don't know much about you. I knew about your friends in school, but that was really about it."

"His name was Soarin. He was a lot like me - rambunctious, impulsive. We were pretty compatible until I lost my zest for adventure. To be honest, I don't know what changed. For the longest time, all I wanted was for the world to know my name, but as time went on, I started caring less about what other people thought. By my early twenties, I wasn't the same person anymore. Once I hit twenty-three, everything fell apart."

"So the wounds are still fresh, huh? I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't be. It wasn't your fault."

"After school ended, I missed seeing you play. It didn't feel the same without cheering for my hometown superstar. I went to a couple games to see what the pros were like, but nothing wowed me like you did."

"Looking back on it, my ego was way too inflated. I thought too highly of myself, and my friendships suffered for it."

"The fact you realize that means you've grown. When I saw you leap over the couch, I could tell something was different. It was more focused and less strained. You've learned how to conserve your energy."

"Back then, I had more to spare. I still have a lot, but it's not limitless like it used to be."

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"May as well."

"Are you happy with how things turned out?"

"I've thought about it for a long time. I really don't think I am, but I don't know how to change it. I was content for a while, but after Tank died, my mind started to slip into a dark place I'd never been before. I've just been kind of stuck there ever since."

"Tank?"

"My pet tortoise. Flutters gave him to me during senior year. He saved me when a boulder collapsed and crushed my wing. Somehow, I made a full recovery. I miss him every day..."

"If you don't mind me being a bit nerdy for a moment, it sounds like you're looking for a way to live life meaningfully. You must've realized your goals were less fulfilling than you thought. You lost your way, and now you're not sure where you're going."

"Pretty much, but how'd you know?"

"Philosophy classes and a healthy dose of personal experience."

"You mean you've been through the same thing?"

"Yep. Growing up, I wanted to be the most famous scientist in the world, but fame doesn't mean much when it separates you from others. The lives we live are uneventful, but stable. There's no divine guidance to tell us what to do or who we should be. That's up to us to decide. Unfortunately, we don't know the answers yet ourselves. To be frank, there's a real chance we may never know. The best we can do is be kind to others and do what we love until our final day. Does that make any sense?"

"Yeah...I think it does."

"Good. 'Cause I was just goin' by the seat of my pants."

"You're a good guy, Noah. I could tell from our first conversation. I hope one day you'll find what you're looking for."

"Same here. You've grown a lot from the person you used to be. From my point of view, you'll be just fine, whether you figure it out or not."

"Thanks. I feel better getting it off my chest."

"Well, looks like we're here. You're welcome to meet my folks if you're interested. Ma cooks up a storm in the kitchen."

"Actually, I'm a bit worn out today. Does tomorrow sound good? I've got everything ready for Halloween, so I'm free during the day."

"Sounds like a plan. Go home and rest. You've earned it."

"I will. Bye."

"Try not to feel too down, okay? Sometimes things have to get bad before they get better. That's the way of the world."

"I'll keep that in mind. Later."

"Yeah...Later..."

Rainbow scoured her room, skimming over her record collection. Noah's words echoed through her head. Did he really miss who she was? Who she used to be? Did she? What did she want? Who did she want to be? Pulling a record from her shelf, she let her thoughts express themselves in musical form, jamming out on her drums to melodic grooves and distant screams. Her limbs reacted on auto-pilot, driving her to new depths of creativity. She had one choice to make. Would she remain the same and live out her days in desperation, or would she grow side by side with the love of another?

"I can't go on like this...Not anymore..."

Skramz

Author's Note

Skramz is what emo kids used to call screamo back in the day. It would often be combined with other genres like hardcore, metalcore, melodic hardcore, and post-hardcore. It would also go by other names like emo-violence to distinguish itself from less aggressive variations of emo music.

Skramz

Rainbow awoke early the next morning, preparing a pot of coffee and breakfast to start the day. After tidying, she began the process of regaining her lost strength, heading outside to train seriously for the first time in ages. Unlike before, she only needed one person to notice. The rest of the world would follow in time.

Following a brief shower, Rainbow got dressed, spending some time in her room to unwind with a few games before heading out. She called ahead to make sure Noah was still up for having her visit. His confirmation was all she needed to hear. At top speed, she flew to his door, arriving much faster than the day before. Upon knocking, Noah answered, along with his older brother, Nathan.

"Well, I'll be damned," the latter expressed in shock, "If it isn't Ms. Gold Medalist herself."

"This is my older brother," Noah explained, "He was a senior when we were both freshman."

"I think I remember seeing him around," Rainbow revealed, "He was pretty active in the sports scene himself, wasn't he?"

"Yes indeed," Nathan confirmed, "Name's Nathan. You can call me Nate if you like."

"Nice to finally meetcha."

"Likewise. I was wondering where my knucklehead brother kept disappearing to. Guess now I know."

"You're the knucklehead..." Noah muttered.

"Please, come in. Ma and sis are working on lunch right now."

"You have a sister?"

"Paulina. She's a tad younger than us. Goes to the same school and everything, so..."

"Before I forget," Rainbow cut it, "I brought a couple things."

The Pegasus pulled two cases from her coat. One was a melodic metalcore compilation from the mid-'90s. The other was a PC game from around 2004 to 2005.

"Thanks," Noah replied graciously, "I'll try 'em out later."

In the back, Noah and Nathan introduced Rainbow to the rest of their family. Paulina finished her homework while their mother Margret finished cooking. She prepared a dish of collard greens, chicken, and mashed potatoes - just the meal to reinvigorate their spirits. While waiting, Nathan pulled his brother to the side. In the hall, they spoke in private, trying to keep their voices barely above a whisper.

"Are you sure you just met a few days ago?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"You're sure?"

"What's the deal, man? You're acting flaky."

"Did something happen at her place?"

"Are you nuts!?"

"Shhh!!!"

Nathan peered around the corner, hoping the others hadn't heard.

"What's your deal!?"

"You didn't notice? She never took her eyes off you."

"What!?"

"At the door. She was talking to me, but focused on you. She was smiling."

"So? What's the big deal?"

"Look."

Nathan directed his brother's gaze back toward the kitchen.

"Ma's already showing her the photo album. You know there's embarrassing stuff in there, but she's not laughing. I saw it, man. There was love in her eyes. I mean that fairy tale happily-ever-after shit. She thinks you're the one."

"You're crazy."

"Am I? 'Cause I'm pretty sure dad would say the same thing. Hell, he'll probably be home before she leaves."

"What makes you so sure?"

"I know you. You're not the type to put up a front to impress a girl. A mare like that? You couldn't if you tried, and yet based on what you're telling me, she fell for you in just two meetings. I've never seen that happen, and I'll be thirty next year."

"All I did was offer advice. How could that mean anything?"

"Because it shows you care. Something tells me she never allowed herself to be vulnerable around others. You gotta keep her close. Opportunities like this are almost unheard of."

"I couldn't take advantage of someone like that. Even if what you're saying's true, it means she's wounded. She deserves better than some boring businessman, anyway..."

"It's only taking advantage if you force it. Help her heal and she'll come to you on her own. Let her take the lead. Trust me. She has faith and motive. She'll make the first move."

"And if she doesn't?"

"Then she'll remember you when her life's back on track. You'll be a legend in her eyes the same way she was in ours."

"I guess when you put it that way. I'm still not sure, though..."

"Has your big bro ever steered you wrong? On second thought...Don't answer that."

Noah made a face in agreement.

After lunch, Rainbow and Noah relaxed on the porch, taking in the scenery to temper their excitement. Noah could see how intensely Rainbow focused on the feeling of nature, listening to leaves scrape against the asphalt. In alliance with Nathan's observations, she seemed happier and lighter. It was the closest she'd been to anyone in years. Something had transformed her, to be sure.

"Hope the others didn't talk your ear off too much. They're excitable around new people."

"Not at all. It's a nice change of pace, actually. Most of the time during school, we were always talking about projects and activities. Kicking back and unwinding feels right, ya know?"

"I hear ya."

"I was thinkin', maybe you could come over for Halloween? We could pass out candy to trick-or-treaters - maybe jam or somethin'."

"If you want."

"Yeah. I'd like that."

"It's a date, then."

Noah grimaced, recoiling in horror at the sound of his own voice. Rainbow's expression remained unchanged. She didn't seem bothered by his phrasing at all.

"You wanna try that CD I brought?"

"Oh...Uh...Sure. I'll go grab my player. Man. How long have I had that thing, anyway?"

"Long time."

"Anyway, I'll be right back."

"Skramz. Get it?"

"Tss. You're a nut."

"Careful. You might crack me."

"Don't threaten me with a good time."

"I warned ya, pal."

"Be back in a minute."

Noah headed inside. Rainbow looked back. She had to tease him a little before the main event.

Hallowed Earth to Catch her Breath

Author's Note

Now that the world and characters are mostly established, the story can pick up a bit. To quote Applejack, "YEEHAW, PARTNER!"

Hallowed Earth to Catch her Breath

October 31st, All Hallows' Eve. Rainbow called Noah earlier than expected. Unsure what was waiting, he headed over with Nate. It was here they first met Rainbow's adoptive sister, Scootaloo. Instruments had been hooked up to extension chords inside. Once the introductions were out of the way, everything clicked into place.

"Hey, guys," Rainbow greeted, "I've got someone here I want you to meet. This is Scootaloo. We've been friends since she was a foal."

"Nice to meetcha," Scootaloo said, "Dash told me all about you. Crazy how it seems so long ago now."

"Tell me about it," Noah concurred, "Nice to meet you, too."

"I see what's going on here," Nathan recognized, "Y'all wanted to jam for the people - show 'em the real power of metal."

"Guilty as charged," Rainbow admitted, "I debated excluding the vocals so it wouldn't scare the kids. Can be kind of intense for a first listen."

"I assume you have a list in mind?"

"All my early stuff from '02 to '04. The first album I recorded was a demo called 'Hallowed Earth to Catch her Breath'. It was based on a daydream I used to fantasize about. The sound combined melo-death with screamo and metalcore to reflect the direction my life was headed at the time. In a sense, it kind of came full circle."

"So it's pretty personal then, huh?"

"It was also back when my mane was shorter. If I released it to the public now, the art would probably show off my evolution between then and now."

"We can read notation fairly well. Might need some help with keys and octaves, though."

"I gotcha covered. I wrote tabs to make it easier."

"Well, that's convenient."

"All I really have left to do is put out the candy. Trick-or-Treaters don't start coming this way 'til after five, so we've got some time."

"Guess we should get started. Drums are my best instrument, so I'll take those. Noah plays bass in his band."

"Show me what you got."

Around three 'o clock, Rainbow sent an announcement out to the neighborhood, letting everyone know their plans. She advised them to bring hearing protection to avoid any long-term damage. The group spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing, watching TV, listening to music, and playing video games. When it was time to start, Rainbow connected several pedals to the guitar and bass amps. The goal was to extend the reverb and delay beyond their normal thresholds. After some tuning, they were ready to play. They decided to practice a bit more before the trick-or-treaters showed up. Rather than nixing the vocals altogether, Rainbow substituted screams for a spoken-word style, making use of her natural voice to avoid frightening onlookers.

"Take this heart. Spread these wings. Here I lay, left to dream of something real. These clouds pass by, whispering nothings of the unknown. Pray these angels one day fly, and guide your lonely soul to mine."

The party harmonized in perfect synchrony, echoing the sincerity of Rainbow's words. Nathan teared up, as though he could physically feel the pain she'd been forced to live through. Seven years of nearly constant isolation. Who could survive something so grueling - something so empty...?

"Holy shit..."

"Now you know why recordings were so few and far between," Rainbow explained, "I'd get too emotional and not wanna do anything for months on end."

"I tried to visit as often as I could," Scootaloo cut in, "but between studying and classes, I don't have as much time these days."

"I know the feeling." a familiar voice spoke. The others turned to face its origin.

"Twilight!? Spike!?"

Before them stood a purple Alicorn and her adolescent companion. Like Rainbow, they had undergone their own set of changes since their last encounter.

"Long time, no see."

"Too long."

Twilight approached her friend, wrapping her in a tight hug. Spike joined, followed by Scootaloo. The quartet soon broke away, facing each other in a long overdue display of acknowledgement.

"I brought you a surprise."

Twilight pulled a phone from her coat pocket.

"I asked everyone to record messages for you. You're the only one who stayed behind, after all."

"Everyone?"

Twilight clicked the play button. The first message was from Rarity. Her time overseas was proving to be fairly fruitful overall.

"Hello, Rainbow. Twilight asked me to send this to check up on you. Sweetie Belle and I are doing well. It's been a fabulous time, but I do so miss everyone back home. Perhaps when we return, we can meet up for coffee or tea. Ciao!"

Rainbow chuckled.

"Just like Rarity. Always straight down to business."

"Do you want to send something back?"

"Of course! No way I could leave her hangin'."

Twilight prepared to open her recording function when she noticed the stallions, locked in place by their instruments.

"Forgive me. I never did ask your names."

Rainbow responded on their behalf, summarizing the events which transpired in Twilight's absence.

"Oh, yeah! This is Noah and his older brother, Nathan. They went to school with us, but we didn't meet until a few days ago. Noah was visiting from out of town."

"You were there!? I'm surprised we never noticed, though I suppose in hindsight, everyone was lost in their own cliques."

"Noah used to watch my games after school. Nathan graduated after freshman year, so he was only around for a while."

"I see. Well, it's nice to meet you now. Better late than never, right?"

"Dash told us what you've been up to," Nathan replied, "Guess you were the brains of the operation, eh?"

"You could say that."

"She always had to remind me to slow down," Rainbow admitted with a hint of embarrassment, "I would always get overzealous between games and practice. Without her, I would've keeled over from dehydration."

"The reason I came is because I was worried. You sounded worn out the last few times we talked. I didn't know if something was happening. You never said anything, so I didn't know what to think."

"To be honest, I was in kind of a dark place for a while. Tank died while you were gone, and I lost interest in the sports stuff. Been trying to get back into it recently."

"I thought so."

"Huh?"

"I suspected something like that might happen. Between us, you always seemed the most aimless. You never really thought ahead. You were always stuck in the present moment, never worried or anxious about anything. When we graduated, it hit you all at once. I never said anything because I didn't know what to do. It's one thing to read up on psychology. It's another to see someone suffer with your own eyes."

"I came out from it stronger, so it wasn't a total loss. Just had to pick up what pieces I could and move on, ya know?"

"I can tell. You sound much better, and I suspect we have you two to thank for that, so...Thank you."

"No problem," Nathan stated, "She's a good kid. Just needed a push is all."

"You're only four years older, pal." Rainbow teased. Nathan stuck his tongue out in defiance. Rainbow responded in kind. Twilight chuckled.

"By the way," Spike interjected, "we heard you guys play. Sounded pretty sick."

"Tone probably sounded familiar. I was listening to a lot of metalcore when I wrote it, especially Broken by Silence."

"Surprised you haven't killed you ears yet."

"I was careful."

"Apparently."

"We're only staying overnight," Twilight mentioned, "We're staying with everyone for a night each. After that, we're heading back home 'til Christmas. Mind if we stick around for your show? I'll record a video and send it to the others in place of a voice message."

"How'd you know?"

Twilight pointed toward her ears, hinting she'd seen others wearing earplugs prior to their arrival.

"All right. You're on."

Trick-or-treaters began arriving just before dark. Rainbow's was the last house most of them went to before heading home, which made their performance all the more impactful. Most of the songs mixed clean tones with distortion, keeping them melodic enough for the kids and heavy enough for everyone else. Each trick-or-treater was given two pieces and a front row seat. Between songs, the group took photos with the audience, setting aside time to show appreciation for everyone who attended. Needless to say, it was a resounding success. At the end of the show, Rainbow gave a heartfelt speech about the impact the town on her.

"All right, guys. We know it's been a long night, and everyone's ready to pack it in. We're grateful you all came to see us, even though this type of music might not be your thing. Your support means a lot to us, and we're happy we could be here to show y'all a good time. A lot of you might remember me from my days as the star player at school. To tell you the truth, I lost faith in my abilities for a while, and I fell out of love with most of what I knew, but now I'm back, and I intend to make it all worth the wait, so hang tight, get ready, and get ready to see what we do next. We love you guys."

Applause erupted. Many in the younger crowd had never seen Rainbow in action before. They would soon enough.

The group helped Rainbow pack her instruments, following her back inside. While Spike, Twilight, and Nathan settled in for the evening, Rainbow spoke with Noah in the kitchen near the living room.

"You were awesome out there. Your technique rips."

"Thanks, but I was just following you and Scootaloo. Sounds a lot better when everyone's playing."

"That's what it's all about, right? Jamming - having fun. It's the most alive I've felt in...Well, ever."

"I'm glad. I can tell you've gotten a lot of your fight back."

"Thanks to you and Nathan."

"Guess it all worked out then, huh?"

"Yeah."

Rainbow veered away with a pensive gaze, as though she was nervous to speak.

"Listen...I was wondering if...Maybe when you're free, you'd like to grab dinner sometime...?"

Noah's face turned red. He grew flustered, unsure of what to say. He wanted to say yes, but the word eluded him. He cleared his throat in an attempt to regain his composure.

"Um...Sure...I mean yes! Of course!"

"I'm not really good with picking restaurants, but does seven Friday sound good?"

"Yeah. I'll make the reservations."

"Thanks. you're a life-saver."

Rainbow drew closer, pecking Noah's cheek.

"In more ways than one."

Rainbow left to make sure the others were comfortable. Noah stood frozen, holding his face as his heart raced in perpetuity. Nathan saw everything, heading in for the kill.

"So...Still don't think she's into you?"

"Shut it."

As the Sun Sets

Author's Note

I posted a blog about it earlier, but my hotmail account was hacked. Fortunately, whoever did it forgot to lock me out and I was able to warn people. The account is twelve years old at this point, so if I lose it, it's not a huge deal, but with that being said, now I'm motivated to write some real emo shit. Make sure to keep your accounts secure.

As the Sun Sets

Twilight and Spike excepted to pack up first thing in the morning, but to their surprise, their friends requested an encore of the previous night's performance. They wanted to hear Rainbow play again, screams and all.

"Looks like you're known for more than just sports now." the Alicorn pointed out.

"The fact you guys wanna hear more's surprising. Flutters and Rarity hated that stuff back in the day."

"Guess something brought 'em around. You gonna go for it?"

"Obviously. Ask and ye shall receive, or however the saying goes."

Noah, Nathan, and Scootaloo helped set the equipment up inside. Rainbow pointed them towards one of her heavier songs, influenced by bands like Jane, As the Sun Sets, They Came Burning, and others. For an authentic old school feel, Rainbow set up a movie in the background - a horror film which delved into the existential depths of love, death, and loneliness. She played a clip from her favorite, and the chaos erupted.

"FRAGMENTED DESECRATIONS!!! A PIECE OF US DIES WITH EVERY MORNING'S LIGHT!!! WHY MUST THIS BLOOD BE SO CLEAR!!!???"

The instruments hammered away, descending into a state of emotional anarchy.

"WHERE IS YOUR SOUL!!!???"

The pattern of blast beats and alternating guitars repeated for some time, gradually declining in speed and culminating in a chug-laden breakdown.

"WHY DID YOU GO!!!??? WHY CAN'T THINGS BE THE SAME LIKE THEY USED TO!!!??? WE ACHE FOR THE PRESENCE OF THOSE WE'VE LOST!!! SO MUCH TIME, SO FEW WORDS - NO ONE TO TELL US OF YOUR LAST DEPARTURE!!! HOW CAN THOSE SO CLOSE SEEEM SO FAR AWAY!!!???"

Nathan maintained rhythm, picking up the pace with steady double kicks. Rainbow's body temperature rapidly increased, bordering on sweat.

"WHEN ONE DAY BECOMES TWENTY YEARS, WE'LL LOOK BACK TO WHEN THE WORLD SEEMED SO MUCH BRIGHTER!!!"

Twilight lowered her phone, shocked by the visceral display. Rainbow was speaking directly to her friends in the most raw, unfiltered way she could think of, spilling her darkest agony to all who would listen. It was no wonder she kept the public performance tame. Twilight ended the recording, stepping forward to embrace her own lost history. The others stopped dead in their tracks.

"Twilight, what are you-"

"That songs about us, right? How we could've died and the others wouldn't have known?"

Everyone was stunned. Either the Alicorn had extraordinary hearing, or...

"You meant so much to us back then, but those words mean more now than they ever would have before. I never forgot, and I will never forget."

Rainbow closed her eyes, sighing and returning the gesture. Somehow, just barely, she suppressed the urge to cry.

"You need rest. I'll fix you something to drink."

Rainbow caught her breath, hydrating before explaining what drove her to write what she had.

"Last year, I was at my lowest. Everything I ever cared about had gone to shit, and I was so fed up with life I just wanted out. I thought about ending it for months. I tried to project an image of stability and calm-headedness, but in private, it was all collapsing. I never played that song until today. I thought letting it out would get it out of my system so I could move on with my life."

"How about now," Twilight inquired, "How do you feel?"

"Honestly? Not much different. Once you get to a place like that, I don't think there's a way to come back - not fully, anyway."

"Did you ever...Ya know...Attempt...?"

"No. Somehow I barely hung on by a thread. If I knew how, I'd tell ya."

"All that matters is your here. You went through the darkest journey anyone can and came out on the other side. That's a testament to your resilience."

"Does it really matter, though? Yeah, I came out of it - broken and mangled almost beyond recognition. If it wasn't for the mane and fur, no one could've told you it was me."

"It's true. You're not the same person anymore. You're in the process of reinventing yourself. You've suffered, but you also care more than anyone I've ever seen. Most never grow beyond a certain threshold, but those limits were never placed on you. You were free to be and do anything. You just didn't know how because your past was holding you back. You could've come to see us any time."

"You all had your own lives to lead. I guess I felt like there was no room for me anymore."

"We would've dropped everything to make sure you were okay. Why would you even doubt that?"

"Because by then, I already needed more help than you could give. Even if I'd visited every so often, I would've left feeling just as bad. I couldn't just barge in and demand a place in your lives. That wouldn't be fair."

"Maybe that unwillingness to compromise was part of what we loved about you."

"To a point, I get it, but not like this. An emotionally unstable individual isn't someone you want around when things are going well. I kept to myself hoping I could either recover or let you guys find me. There was no real alternative to mitigate the situation. It was out of our control."

"What about therapy? There were people who could've helped you better than us."

"People I didn't know. Being emotionally involved with clients is discouraged for a reason. At least talking to you, there was a better chance I'd get through. An impartial third party can only be so invested. If anything, we would've destroyed each other. It wasn't a case of broken chemical receptors. It was just life doing its thing. I had no chance of fighting back from the get-go. I tried, but the weight was too crushing."

"Yet you fought back every day, learning ways to cope and creating works of art that'll last a lifetime. You aren't as weak as you think."

"Certainly feels like it..."

"Tell you what. We have enough time for one more go. Why don't we try this again with a bit more focus?"

"I really don't think I can..."

"I think otherwise. It's clear to me your mind's been working against you for some time. Stop letting it dictate how you feel and tell it what you want to feel."

"Twilight's right," Noah chimed in, "Maybe it's time to let the world hear what you have to say. There's more people who relate than you think."

Rainbow sighed again.

"Fine. Fuck it. No reason not to, right."

"There we go! That's more like it!

The group set up their instruments again: this time with a clear goal. Rainbow chose a song that more accurately reflected reality. The music was less chaotic, driven primarily by a mix of traditional and odd time signatures.

"DIG THIS HOLE STRAIGHT BELOW THE EARTH! DRIVE THIS STAKE STRAIGHT THROUGH A FRACTURED CHEST! TIME IS A VAMPIRE, DRAINING BLOOD FROM ALL! SCREAMS OF THE PAST ECHO EACH OTHER'S NAMES, LEAVING US TO DROWN IN A RIVER OF REGRET! SEE HER TREMBLE, LOST AMIDST THE WAVES! WITH ONE SMALL STEP, SHE SEEKS THE LIGHT AT THE END!"

Spike bobbed his head. The lyrics were easier to understand with the more precise structure. They told the story of a girl traveling through worlds of lost souls. Rainbow's descriptions detailed oceans simultaneously obeying and disregarding physics. It was a unique concept hidden between the crevices of a disenchanted generation. This was the song they would remember - the one they would send to their friends.

Chrysanthemum

Author's Note

I've done what I can to contain the breach. If my accounts get nuked, I guess we know why. Least it came at a good time for the story. This is where things stop being edgy and the real plot begins. Hopefully someone stuck around this long.

Chrysanthemum

Twilight and Spike took their leave, bidding Rainbow adieu until their next their next meeting.

"We should probably head home," Noah acknowledged sadly, "Ma'll worry if we're gone too long."

"We're still on for dinner, right?"

"Of course! Wouldn't have it any other way."

"Tell me something. You can be honest. Do you think less of me?"

"Why would I?"

"You saw what happened in there. I was a total mess. That's not something most people would wanna be around."

"It's okay to be sad. I get it. I told you before - I've been there too. Sometimes having a shoulder to cry on is the only thing that helps."

"Have you ever felt like this before?"

"A couple times. We had a few family friends pass away when we were younger. I was sick during one of their services, but I had to go because it was the last chance I had to see 'em. It was probably one of the worst days of my life."

"How'd you get through it?"

"I slept. I had to fight off the fever before I could fight the demons. You get through it one battle at a time."

"How long will those battles last?"

"You may not like the answer."

"The rest of my life..."

For the next week, Rainbow stayed home alone working, training, and recording. During her downtime, she would engage in leisurely activities. It made such a difference having others to share those experiences with. All she could think about was how much she missed everyone, but she tried to put her feelings aside. Noah's well-being was just as important as hers, and she wanted him to be in good spirits too. Perhaps if he was happy, she could be too...

Finally, the big night came. Rainbow showered, brushing her teeth and picking out a modest dress with a white button-up coat. She considered applying makeup, but decided against it, preferring the look of her natural features. She packed a small case with contingencies, waiting by the door in her driveway. Noah arrived soon after, having borrowed Nathan's van for the evening. It was freshly-cleaned as expected. He led Rainbow into the passenger seat.

"Your carriage, madam."

"Why thank you, kind sir."

Rainbow stepped in, Noah joining her after. They talked for a moment, savoring the occasion.

"Ya know, I've never really done this before," Rainbow admitted, "I only dated a few stallions during my heyday. They were good guys, but they didn't know much about romantic gestures."

"I learned a lot from observation. I was debating whether I should tell you or not, but I want to be honest. You're the first mare I've ever been with."

"You mean...You've never dated anyone before...!?"

"Shocking, right? I only know what I know because of Nathan. He was the ladies' man of the family. All I had to do was see what he did right, and more importantly, what he did wrong. I just kind of picked up on the signs from there."

"I take it you were too busy studying and working to think about finding a partner?"

"How'd you guess?"

"You and Twilight have a lot in common."

"Right. Makes sense."

Rainbow reached over, comforting Noah's hoof with her own.

"Hey. Don't worry. You don't need to impress me. All I'm looking for right now is company and friendly conversation. There's a whole future ahead we know nothing about. Who knows what could happen between now and then?"

Noah smiled. The warmth in Rainbow's voice soothed his anxiety in a way he'd never felt before.

"I think I can manage that."

Rainbow smiled back. In truth, she was seeking something more, but that was for another time - another place.

Noah drove the pair to a restaurant called Eilimar's - a dinery which specialized in eastern cuisine. The attendant showed them to their table, where a bouquet of flowers awaited their arrival. They ordered a bottle of red wine and an appetizer to set the mood.

"This is really sweet," Rainbow acknowledged, "I appreciate you going out of your way for me. I guess we both have experiences we need to brush up on."

"Not at all. I was more than happy to help."

"Do you remember when you took me to you guys' place?"

"Of course. Why?"

"To be honest, I heard you and Nathan talking."

"Oh...About that...I'm-"

"Don't apologize. I was there because I wanted to be. Nathan saw right through me that day."

"I don't quite follow."

"I wanted to see you, doofus. That shred of sympathy had me coming back for more like a lovesick puppy. The same way he saw through me, I saw through you."

"I'm that easy to read, huh...?"

"I didn't know whether it was real or just something to butter me up, but now I know. You really care, don't you...?"

"I...Well..."

"It's okay. You don't have to tell me. The look on your face is a dead giveaway."

"Sorry...It's just...This is all so sudden, ya know? You're the first mare I've ever encountered who challenged me to think my life over, and I guess...I guess I respected that. Your boldness as well. It takes a lot of courage to admit you need help. The way you were so open with me...Something told me I had to be there...Even if it was just as a friend..."

"I had the same feeling. I think we were both lonely and needed someone to help us find our way again. The loss of your loved ones cut deeper than you showed. It scraped you to the bone. You never told anyone besides me, did you?"

"No. I didn't."

"I feel it - that connection. It's the kind of thing that only comes along once in a lifetime. I want to build something with you, but we have to do it right. If we rush things and don't learn each other's flaws, it'll be doomed from the outset. We have to take our time, and that's my biggest weakness. I've always been impatient."

"I know what you mean. I can be the same way."

"Then that's the first thing we have to work on. We have time, so we should use it wisely, and I think I know where to start."

"Where?"

"You've been following along with whatever I wanted. I need to know about you - your likes, your dislikes, your fears, your dreams: all that sentimental crap."

"Well, to be honest, there's not much about my life I'd change. I like the person I am. Maybe there's room for growth, but I don't know where yet. Sometimes though, I feel like life is passing me by. I'm not sure what do or if I can do anything. Those years at school passed by so fast. It's all a blur to me now."

"I think you've been lost in sadness without realizing it. People you love dying leaves an indelible scar that never truly heals. It's how you apply those lessons that makes the difference."

"You mean cherishing the ones who are still here, right? I do - more than anything."

"But you're afraid to form new connections. You're protecting yourself from pain by cutting off all avenues of entry. It might work in the short term, but starving yourself of meaningful relationships creates a vicious cycle of despair. You can only break out of your own choosing. I didn't learn that until I met you in the park. Sometimes, the most powerful lessons aren't spoken out loud."

"I think you're right. I spent so much time wallowing I couldn't see what was in front of me. I need to change that if I want to care about others more effectively."

"Now you get it."

The waiter brought the couple their food. They continued to discuss their strengths and weaknesses over a pleasant meal, stopping after the first bottle of wine. They planned ahead to maintain cognizance in the face of decision-making, preferring to remain level-headed during the following course of events. Once Rainbow was back home Noah led her to the door, ready to say goodbye until dawn.

"Thanks for talking with me. I think I understand myself a little better now."

"Me, too. You helped me see clearer than I have in a long time. I wish we could be reckless like we used to, but it would only end badly now."

"Then for now, I'll return the favor."

Noah approached Rainbow, pecking her cheek the same way she'd done the week prior. Her face turned hot, changing in hue to reflect her emotions. It was almost miraculous what one conversation could do when both parties were willing to listen.

"Good night. Sweet dreams."

Noah turned to walk away, stopping as a tug held him in place.

"Hold on there, big guy. You can't just leave without a proper goodnight kiss."

The mare pulled her lover in, pressing her lips against his. She only pulled away before crossing the threshold. They had to be mindful, much as the notion repulsed them.

"Take this home and give it a listen. I think you'll like it."

"What is it?"

"It's a demo I recorded waiting for you."

Noah made out what he could in the dark. The cover depicted a literal interpretation of split personalities. The title read Butterfly Kisses and Yearbook Stickers.

"I wrote it about our time at school leading up to now. With how much things have changed, I thought it best to reflect on what led us here."

"Thanks. I'll pop it in when I get home."

"Be careful. Call me in the morning, okay?"

"I will. Good night."

Rainbow released the stallion, watching intently as he strolled back to the car. As he drove away, a drizzle began to fall. Rainbow stood in place, cleansing herself in heaven's blessing of her newfound purpose.

"Sleep well, Noah..."

Fated Fall (Interlude)

Author's Note

Pacing's about to kick into overdrive. Two more chapters before the time-skip.

Fated Fall (Interlude)

Noah and Rainbow kept in contact over the following month. Towards the end of November, he invited her back to the park for a restful day. Of course, there was natural tension involved, but they knew it would subside with time. Rainbow rested on her paramour's lap, reading through a book she'd finished once before during senior year.

"Whatcha' readin'?"

"Dragon of Grace. It's a novel that came out in the early '00s. It's about a post-apocalyptic timeline where only one group of survivors remains. The central character's a girl in her twenties named Maria Drake. They all fight monsters together called the insidious. The author was exploring themes of depression, growth, and redemption throughout the story. He was also into the same stuff as me at the time."

"So you think of yourselves as kindred spirits in a way."

"Yeah. It spoke to me on a personal level. I know it sounds weird, but I feel like if I knew him, we'd get along well."

"I don't think that's weird. You'd be surprised how many people think like you. It might not be the most common thing in the world, but it's definitely not unheard of."

"Yeah. Good point."

"You look beautiful today..."

"Today?"

"Every day."

"Well, you ain't so shabby yourself, slick."

Noah chuckled. Her tough talk never failed to make him laugh. Knowing her was a totally different experience from being aware of her existence. In truth, he would never know who she was back then, but now...He wouldn't be anywhere else...

"Well? What are you waiting for?"

Noah leaned down, kissing Rainbow softly. To be young and in love. It was truly worth living for.

"Are you worried?"

"About what?"

"About whether we can make it work when I leave."

"Nah. I trust you. You trust me too, right?"

"I do. I just don't want us to grow apart. I've never felt like this before, and I want it to last forever."

"We'll make it last - together."

"You always know just what to say."

"Guess that's something we have in common. Now, why don't you make yourself useful and get me something to drink?"

"As you wish."

Rainbow freed the stallion she called hers, smiling as he walked away. This was what she wanted the world to know - that while capable of sorrow, she could feel great joy as well. She was whole again - complete in a way one could only be through trial and error.

"Come back soon."