After we had moved the family across Canterlot and into the castle, the first thing my family did was just stare in awe at just how clean the castle’s halls were. Red carpet lined with gold, ran up every corridor that you could take. As we walked, Luna had to break off so she could get started on Day Court, but she said she’d look forward to talking with my family in length later. “So do you guys wanna stay in separate rooms or y’all wanna come up to mine and Celly’s bedchambers? I think my wife went and got a bigger bed just in case we need more room for pony piles.”

“Kodi,” Ma shook her head. “Seriously, this is where we’re staying?” She shook her head. “How did you go from working at Maccas to literally being a Prince in another dimension?” She asked.

“Uh…” I hummed. “If you think about it…” I shook my head. “I dunno. So where y’all wanna sleep?” I asked.

“You said something about a pony pile,” Dan pointed out. “What’s that?”

“I’ll show you,” I said.

Button and Dave, as they walked along, seemed to be getting along just fine. Button was currently showing my little brother some magic, mostly just a Fireball that Button had grown to have perfect control over. Katie and Dan were watching it too. Ma hadn’t noticed yet, but… shit. I can’t teach Ma magic; she’s gonna probably be as much of a monster as Twilight was, and I only really knew how to teach Python. I can be a decent teacher in the other forms of magic, and be a decent practitioner of said forms of magic, but I’m not an expert… Celly and Twilight can fill those gaps in.

“So Mrs. Gaime, would you like to hear about the time that Source fought the queen of a shapeshifting race? Not only was it rather impressive, given how much more gifted with magic the queen was.”

Ma slowly turned and looked at me. Given she was walking right next to me, basically brushing up against my side. “Why did you take on a shapeshifter that could’ve apparently killed you at any point?” She asked.

“She was trying to take over Canterlot, the city we’re in, and she also hurt Celly. Like breaking Celly’s legs and wings hurt. Said queen also kidnapped me and my niece-”

“Show me where this Queen is so I can break her neck, then,” Ma said.

“Ma, No, we bent her legs, and now she’s an ally of the country; we forced her into it or she’d get beheaded, basically… Nah, we were gonna launch her across Equestria; her race is actually pretty good, just not Chrysalis, the queen.”

Ma nodded at that. “Okay, that’s acceptable, I suppose. If she tries hurting you again, though, I am breaking her neck.”

After we stepped into the Room, Button sat in front of us as we all settled in the bed in a pony pile. It took a while of setting up, but it ended up with this layout. I, Celly and Ma were at the bottom, with me and Celly pressed up against each other. Dan was laying on top of Celly, since in his words…

“Kodi, your wife is a living, heated pillow.” He said, snuggling into Celly’s back.

“I have been told that that is one of my best qualities,” Celly mused. “However, you will not be allowed to have the best spot in the house,” she gestured to me, who was snuggled up under one of her wings. One of my own was draped, as much as I could drape it, over Celly in return, and the other was covering up Ma. “As a spot under my wings is reserved for my husband and my son. However, if you ask nicely enough-”

“Man, that looks so toasty and comfy under there,” Dan sighed. “Dammit, Source, is Luna available-”

“You’re underaged, seeing as you don’t have a cutie mark, and you aren’t eighteen,” I pointed out. “Also Luna’s dating somepony already, Tale and her are so damn happy together. If they literally weren’t nocturnal, or if Tale wasn’t so quiet a lot of the time…” I shrugged. “Also Luna’s natural body temperature is lower than the average pony’s, instead of higher than the average pony’s.” I shrugged. “I’m sure Luna would let you cuddle under her wings anyways.”

Dave ended up plopping himself right in between Celly’s legs. “This is really weird; we all had separate rooms back at home, and now we’re all cuddling together like we’ve been ponies our whole lives.”

'Well, we don’t really need to worry about privacy; ponies already don’t wear clothes.’

Button was sitting in front of Katie, while she laid her head in between her forelegs. She was pressed up into the other side of Celly and subsequently had a wing draped over her. Button was showing her a fun little light show with his fire magic. Ma took notice of that, before slowly turning to me. Katie didn’t seem to care; she just loved the show.

The fireball that Button was controlling broke into eight, no… he just remade the solar system. His head acted as the Sun as the solar system, as I described it from home, started whirling around his head. He even made an asteroid belt. “Tada…” I slid out from under Celly’s wing and started watching Button’s little show. I watched as Button smiled broadly at me… just as his eyes started glowing and so did his flanks.

He just got this fucking cutie mark.

His cutie mark was a little magician’s hat with a wand, along with fire, ice, water and air.

“Holy mother fucking christ,” I whispered. “Button,” I inched closer. “You know what you just got, right?”

“Uh…” he slowly turned around and started looking at his rear end. “Oh…” I tackled Button and started laughing so hard that I was crying. My little kid’s growing faster than I’d like. “Dad,” he said. “As excited as I am about the cutie mark, I need to be free from your grasp to fully celebrate it,” he said. As he said that, I could feel his little body wiggling in my grasp, so I let him go and he started running around the room happily bouncing and jumping and teleporting. He even DragonFired a few times which was incredibly cute.

It all ended with him tackling me onto the bed, but then he teleported both of us… right under Celly’s wings that I had left, and he settled in next to Katie. “Oh…”

“We’re gonna have to plan your Cute-Ceanera,” I said excitedly.

Celly nodded. “If I wasn’t currently your family’s chosen, heated pillow, I would be prancing right now.” She hummed. “We could all go to Ponyville, once we teach your family the basics of being ponies, including levitation.”

“Wait, ain’t that the place where three little girls blew up a building with bread?” Ma asked.

“It is, but most of the time it’s a pretty peaceful town.”

“We can push my cutie mark party until after we get the rest of the family settled in. Didn’t it take you a few months to get used to being a pony, Dad?” Button asked.

“It did, but Ma’s already got her first spark; she’ll be able to use magic in no time.”

“...What’s a first spark?” Ma asked.

The next day, we all piled up into a room I’ve not been in for a while. That place was the magical testing chambers, or at least, the one Celly used when me and Twilight actually had consistent lessons with her. My whole family was piled in, and since Ma was the first one to have her first spark, as in the first time her horn’s actually lit up, I’m going to try and focus on her magic first, while trying to get everyone else’s first sparks as well. However, before I could even begin teaching Ma anything, Celly pushed me out of the way. As did Luna.

“Source, while I do believe you are a wonderful teacher,” Celly said. “You’d probably try teaching your mother how to use Python,” she shuttered. “That won’t end well, and you know it. I can teach your mother, traditional magical systems, equations, and what-have you. With how powerful your mother apparently seems, which is odd given your natural lack of power, traditional magic would be more optimal. However…” my wife hummed. “You could be a proficient teacher, but I have experience on my side, Source. You, you do not.”

“I was gonna ask you, Twilight, or Luna to help teach my Ma magic.”

Ma blinked. “Y’all never answered my question, the fuck’s a first spark? And how the fuck do I have it? Is that some sorta disease?”

“Grandma,” Button interrupted. “A first spark happens when a unicorn lights their horn up for the first time… ever. Usually it takes years and can either happen intentionally or unintentionally.”

“And you, Mrs. Gaime, accidentally got your first spark while babying Dave. I believe… tell me,” Celly just unleashed all of her ambient magic. Everyone shivered except for Luna and I, mostly because Luna almost, definitely, matched her sister, and I was used to feeling it. “The best way to describe the feeling of magic is… does your horn feel like it’s in water?” She asked. Ma nodded. “That is because of my own magic. You, without knowing it, have a similar effect, though not as mine. Or Source when he is angry.”

“...Whaddya mean by that? Kodi doesn’t make my new head penis feel like it’s underwater…” Ma blinked when Celestia gave her a blank stare.

“Of course you’d call it a head penis; that’s what your son used to call it as a really bad joke.” Celly shook her head. “I’ve seen how much magic Source can wield while angry. He saw me get batted at by an Ursa Minor, a giant bear made of the night sky, and threw the poor thing into orbit. He threw it so hard that the bear caught fire on the way up.” She nodded at me. “It was rather attractive, yet horrifying. I’ve never seen Source get so angry before then.”

“...Kodi actually got mad at something?” Katie asked. “I don’t think I’ve seen him get mad… ever.”

“I remember seeing Source mad when I, as Nightmare Moon, stuck Tia on the Sun. He was so mad that he didn’t consider the differences between neutering or spaying, and cursed like a sailor.” Luna giggled. “I will admit, I was scared of him in my weakened state after I was struck by what Source dubs the ‘gay beam of death’.”

“The… fuck? In the sun!?” Ma asked.

“We’re getting distracted,” Celly summoned a tennis ball. “Mrs. Gaime, I want you to move this ball without touching it. Think about how much you want to move it.”

Ma shrugged and went cross eyed while staring at the ball. Before she knew it, her horn lit up, and pushed the ball… so hard that it slammed into a nearby wall and cracked it. Those walls are supposed to be magic proof. Ma blinked. “Is that supposed to happen?” She asked.

Celly and I were just bug eyed, and so was Luna. “Ma, we’re gonna need you to get better control of magic before we unleash you on the general public. You might kill somepony on accident,” I shook my head.

“Uh…”

“Try again, but think of it like you’re handling Dave when he was first born,” I suggested.

The ball moved subtly before it was scooped up in the air and gently lowered itself into ma’s hoof. Then it flung into her chest when she cheered about doing it. She cringed in pain and fell over, and I was on her in a heartbeat. I laid down, pulled her onto my side and started blasting her with healing spells.

“Kill somebody?” Ma croaked. “I think I’ll end up killing myself with this shit before I accidentally kill anyone else!”

“Hmm… perhaps you need better Rune control. You seem to naturally know how to do runes…” I grinned like an idiot. “My fucking god,” I laughed. “Oh shit. Oh my fucking god!” I kept on laughing.

“...What?” Ma asked. She was feeling better now from all the healing spells. “Is my pain funny to you, son? I will beat your ass-”

“No Ma,” I nuzzled her. “You think I would’ve reacted as quickly as I did when I saw you in pain?” I teleported my copy of WME, it was still in development since Twilight knew about it, and thus wouldn’t be a funny prank. “Your main problem is controlling your magic, and Runes go a long way with controlling your magic, so…” I opened the book. “Start doing the alphabet of this, not any of the spells, you will wanna kill yourself or somebody else if you do. If you can do the whole alphabet in one go, you should have better magic control…”

Celly looked a little upset. “Source… I was hoping to teach your mother so that we can get some quality bonding time in…”

“Oh.” I started staring at the ground. “Sorry, Celly.”

“No… this is for the best, WME will teach your mother better Rune control, and from there I can start teaching her the equations of more common spells and the general understanding of magic theory,” Celly clapped her hooves. “Now we both can yell at you for making such a stupid fucking spell system!”

“...You’re gonna hold me down while Ma tickles me until I piss meself, aren’t you?”

“Definitely,” Ma nodded. “By the time we are done, your wife and I will bully the ever living shit out of you.”

“Ma…” I draped a wing over her and hugged her neck. “Can’t we just cuddle and snuggle forever and you don’t teach my wife how to embarrass the fuck out of me, or plot my death by tickles?” I asked.

“No.”

I’m gonna fucking die.

A few hours later, somehow, some stupid way, Pinkie Pie found out that my family was now in Equestria. I don’t know how, I don’t know why, but I guess you can’t stop the Pinkster… I still owe her a date, but for now, she’s seemingly forgotten about it in the letter she sent, expressing how she’s getting Twilight and the rest of her friends and going to Canterlot at the last second to set up a party. She managed to ship a letter to Cadance weeks ago, and so my niece and Shiny were coming over later today too. Everyone would be here around when Pinkie would usually hold a party, so eight at night.

I got that letter while I was sitting on a cushion, watching Button teach Dave how to play a few pony games. It may have seemed innocent, and it was, but Button also just wanted to try and teach his fellow colt how to colt before fillies start chasing him. Resting on another cushion was Daniel, being the little mama’s boy he was, he was snuggled up into her side while she read through the motions of WME.

Katie was snuggled up under my wing, mostly because out of everyone, aside from Ma, she missed me the most.

“This is hard,” Dave groaned as Button pinned him down again.

“If it makes you feel any better, my Dad, and your older brother, still barely manage to walk straight. He walked into a door one day because he was too busy watching Mom’s hips sway as she walked.” How the fuck did… God dammit.

“That is so weird to hear, too,” Dave got up and stretched. A nice yawn escaped his lips when he did. “Hearing how my brother is attracted to horses.” He looked at Ma. “Ain’t that a bit weird, Ma?”

“I ain’t judgin’,” Ma shrugged. Celly had to go deal with day court, so we were all lounging in a room that was technically hers, but not really. “In time y’all be chasin’ ponies too, Dave. Heck, I might if given enough time to dwell on it. I’ve seen how your brother and his wife work together; Kodi’s happy, genuinely happy, and gets along just like cereal and milk with Celestia.”

“You know,” Katie added. “As weird as it that you’ve bagged a pony, how’d you bag a princess?” She asked.

“Well, I was already a known case to her. You don’t just show up in a magical accident-caused crater where there’s no magic. That sounds normal until you realize that if something has no magic, it’s an anomaly. Even the rocks here should have some, not a lot, but some magic. I did wake up in this very castle’s infirmary, after all. How I bagged Celly as y’all would call it… actually, Celly would too, she knows how lucky I feel when I wake up to her raising the sun every morning.

“Uh, I guess she found the body I woke up with attractive because of how boring it was, and that I didn’t treat her like a princess.”

“He called Mom ‘Sun Butt’ during their wedding reception,” Button chimed in. “He still does, when I have a Joyboy and they both think I’m not listening to them.”

“Uh yeah, Celly just liked that I didn’t kiss her ass and that I made her laugh. It all kinda started when she tried picking me up from the motel I was initially staying in, y’know, when I got mugged. It was kinda funny, I won’t even lie. Uh, I held a mare at knife point because I only knew how to throw fireballs and didn’t want to light anypony on fire. Celly showed up, put the fear of god in them, literally seeing as she’s seen as a demi-god even if she doesn’t realize it, and then we went to a cafe.”

“Is that your first date?” Katie asked. Stars filled her eyes, possibly dreaming of finding her own lover one day.

“Oh no, I had a panic attack. Getting surrounded by dozens of reports and ponies, while needing pills to operate in social situations like that, while not having access to those pills for months, really fucks you up. So uh, Celly dragged me into an alleyway and we cried on each other, me, because I had a panic attack. She cried because she let me have a panic attack. Celly had makeup on; Celly doesn’t use make up. She was tryna’ court me the whole damn time and my stupidass didn’t see it until Twilight, a friend of mine, found out about Celly’s courting rituals.”

I nuzzled Katie. “I could help ya find somebody, if you’re up for a colt instead of a boy. Granted, I really don’t talk to any teenaged ponies. You’d also need to get your cutie mark, since most ponies really see you as a mare once you get that. However, until you’re eighteen, even with one of those, I will beat the shit out of any adult trying to date ya.”

Blueblood took the time to step inside our room. He blinked a few times. “Uh…” his eyes fell on Katie.

“Blueblood, if you even think about where you wanna put your dick, I will chop it off and make you fuck yourself with your own fucking penis.” I warned the fucker. “And then I’ll toss you out the window and have Celly say it was an accident that you fell out of the window.”

“Understood,” Blueblood turned around. “Have a nice day, uncle.”

Oh. I can’t make him fuck himself. His asshole got stitched up. Probably after I shoved a crowbar up there.

“...What the fuck?” Daniel asked. “Kodi, I think that’s the first time I’ve seen you have a spine without taking any medicine.”

“Oh yeah,” I shrugged. “Meh, I let my wife do whatever she wants to me. But that’s one of my… my nephew but not really. I knew exactly what he was doing, and where he was trying to get peeks at.” I noted that Katie chose now to lay her head between my forelegs, by instinct or not, and so I laid my head on top of hers. “He already tried it with two of my nieces before, so if he tried it with my sister, he was definitely gonna break his last straw.”

“...What was he trying to do?” Katie asked. “He seemed polite enough-”

“Okay, y’all haven’t gotten the chance to meet her yet, but there’s this mare named Snowdrop. Snowdrop’s my niece, and then there’s another mare you’all be meeting later tonight named Cadance. They’re both technically high princesses, though Snowdrop’s mostly through title alone. They’re my nieces, and while not related by blood, are Blueblood’s cousins. Keep this in mind; Blueblood wanted to sleep with them. Like sex. Babies.”

“...What the fuck?” Kaite asked. “He wanted that with me? I’m not even an adult, physically, according to you.”

“Which is why I threatened to use his own dick to fuck him.” I said. I then shrugged. “I dunno if it shows if I’ve grown as a person or not, or if Celly is just that good at building confidence in ponies around her. If that happened a year ago, I think Blueblood woulda kicked my shit in because I was too ‘scrawny’ to stop him.”

“Dad, he offered to sleep with me,” Button interjected.

…

“Okay, as in just to cuddle, or…”

“I don’t know.”

Blueblood’s going to be past tense when I’m done with him. I slowly pulled out a knife from the cushion me and Katie were laying on.

“Jesus Christ, Dad, I’m joking!” Button took the knife away from me. “Jeez, you let me and Mom do whatever we want to you, but the moment somepony threatens us, you’re ready to murder somepony.”

I took a deep breath. “Nobody touchy my baby,” I teleported Button on top of my head. “My baby,” I chuckled and let him go back to Dave, where both colts promptly started cuddling.

“I wanted to hold the baby,” Katie interjected. “Baby ponies are so cute…”

“You have not even seen a proper baby yet,” I pointed out. “I once had to foalsit with Pinkie Pie, somepony else you’ll meet later tonight. She foalsits for a couple kids, Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake. They’re adorable, but Jesus Christ they’re chaotic.” I chuckled and teleported a photo. I showed Ma and Daniel first. Even Dan’s heart melted. Then I showed Katie. “I offered Celly and Lulu a chance to turn themselves into foals so that they can get a day of the ‘childhood they never had’.”

Katie slowly turned to me. “How do I get a cutie mark?”

“Be good at something,” I shrugged.

“Button,” Katie said. “Can you come here, please?”

“Auntie cuddles?” Button asked as he sauntered up to my little sister.

“Yeah,” Katie said. She laughed when Button cheered and jumped into her forelegs.

“Dave,” I opened my wing. “You can join us, y’know-”

“Now what’s this about me having…” Snowdrop slammed the door open. She started sniffing.

“Is… she blind?” Ma asked.

“Yes I am,” Snowdrop, while acting like a dog, sniffed her way over to Dave. He was promptly moved to a cushion with Snowdrop. “So these are all the new additions to the royal family? Three more foals and a mare?” She asked. Dave cooed at being held in Snowdrop’s slender, though apparently comfy legs.

“How… half of us weren’t talking.”

“I can hear you breathe,” Snowdrop said kinda creepily. “Yer lucky Luna’s asleep, Mrs. Code. She’d have you all in a snuggle party this instant.”

“...I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” Dan pointed out.

Just as soon as my buddy, Solar walked in. “Dear, please… Where the f-buck did all these kids come from?” He was definitely following Snowdrop. He had been assigned as her personal guard for some odd reason; they're only dating each other.

Ma started laughing at the first pony ‘swear’ she’s heard.

I woke up from my nap, I was holding Daniel, the now, teenage colt was snuggled up under my chin… when I took a nap, he was, in fact, not there. I was holding Dave when I took the nap, with Katie snuggled up into my side. Looking around, I could see Ma sitting there with a camera, and a guard she probably requested from the guard. Snowdrop was also snickering behind a hoof. Dan slowly woke up too, somehow he kept his horn from jabbing me in the throat as he gently raised his head up and around my chin. He blinked wearily, took a nice, big yawn as his eyes slowly fell on who he was sleeping on.

“Kodi, why am I using you as a bed? I was snuggled up with Ma.”

“I dunno. I’m not complaining; I haven’t even gotten to hold my favorite little brother since we got here.” I laid my head back down.

“Eh,” Dan laid his head down next to mine and Ma took another photo. “They set us up.”

“Yeah, and you don’t care,” I pointed out. “I don’t either.”

“I… don’t know how to feel about getting acquainted with cuddling with my family so quickly.” Dan shrugged. “But it does feel nice.”

“Y’know we aren’t supposed to get hugged, according to the social norm back home.” I pointed out. “Hence why I took to it so quickly. It also helps that my wife’s a living furnace that makes snuggling very pleasant.” I sat up and piled on my brother before grooming him. “And now that you’re here, I can do this,” I said in between grooming licks.

“Kodi!” Dan protested, but made no attempts to get away. “Why…? Ma’s right there with a camera!”

“And I missed you. Like hell I give a damn about my own dignity right now. Look at Button and Dave.” They were wrestling in a corner and growling at each other. I hugged my brother tighter. “And so I’m going to hug you as tightly as I can-”

“Sir,” the guard said. “We were waiting for you to wake up to inform you… Princess Cadance is here, as well as her husband. The Elements of Harmony have all shown up as well and are in the west side, private ballroom.” He nodded. “My apologies if you wished to be notified sooner.” He smirked and grabbed one of the photos my Ma took. “But you, admittedly, looked precious, your Highness.” There, I could see me and Dan being fast asleep, I was on my back, holding my little brother on my belly as we snoozed the last couple hours away.

I snorted. “Man, if you share that around the fuckin’ platoon of guards that we’ve got in Canterlot and that becomes my new reputation.” I let Dan go, so he and the rest of us could get ready for a party. “One, that’d be funny, secondly, I would approve. But if any guard tries to spoon me, they’re getting kicked in the balls, or if it’s a mare, I will kindly remind them that I am a married man.”

The guard smirked. “Yessir.” He saluted me and walked out.

“...What was that about?” Ma asked.

“Oh, around the guard training grounds, I have a pretty decent reputation. Most of the guards regard me as a pretty decent fighter, and I get along with most of them because of how laid back I am with them. They also like how I don’t try to take the spotlight from their actual commanding officers and told them I wouldn’t try to if something shitty’s going on.” I sat up with a stretch. “Also they watched me beat the shit out of Prince Blueblood, and nopony likes him.”

After that little thing, I brushed everypony out with my magic, and Ma was sitting there, agape at what I was doing. I was brushing everyone while making sure we were all presentable. “Kodi,” she said, lifting the WME draftbook I had made with her own magic. “I… Yer feckin’ good at magic. That’s something I never thought I’d say to you, ever, yet here we are.”

“Ma, you’re holding a book with Levitation, and you haven’t launched it yet. That’s quicker than me; it took me months to figure that out and you’re already doing it just fine.” It’s only been about a full day since Ma even became a pony.

“I suppose…” she shrugged. “I have great potential, apparently, but magic is nowhere near my forte. I’m a business woman, not a mage.”

“When will we be learning magic?” Katie asked. “I heard you say something about a fireball. I wanna throw a fireball.”

“Once I get y’all’s first sparks. It might not be too hard. It might be super hard. I can tell that you and Dan are going to need to use Python to get the most of your magic. Dave… I dunno, he’s a bit young, so I don’t know if Python will-”

“Isn’t Python that coding thing you said you hated during dinner once?” Katie asked.

“It is, yeah.” I shrugged. “It’s also what I named a spell system I designed for myself, and then other ponies when I realized how useful it could be.”

Once we were all not messy, and well groomed, it really did just hit me. Dan was pretty handsome and Katie was rather pretty. God damn, if they wanna stay in Equestria, they’re gonna have so many fucking suitors. Ma looked rather pretty, as well, and I suppose her figure is somewhat eye-catching? One of the guards we were with, a night guard, Electro Knife I think, was trying to steal glances at her. Button already knew the way and was leading Dave ahead of us. The two of them were playing tag.

It didn’t take us very long to get to the west-private ballroom. Our guards stayed outside, joining the two guards already at the left side of the door.

When we all stepped inside, everyone that wasn’t already in the Royal Family stopped what they were doing and started staring at us. Cadance immediately snagged Dave, and I think he would be annoyed at constantly being snuggled whenever a mare sees him, but… it’s really hard to hate Cadance. Damn near impossible even. He had a big, happy little smile plastered on his face as my niece started nipping his neck. Shining Armor joined in and got happy little coos out of the colt in exchange for their joint efforts. They were probably already up to speed, since Celly probably told them about my family as soon as they got here.

Luna was already chatting with Ma, and the two were getting along like bread and butter from the looks of it… nevermind, Ma just fucking headlocked Luna. My poor in-law was struggling to get out of my mother’s grasp. She was genuinely trying to get out too, and wasn’t getting anywhere. Instead, it was just met with a tighter grip.

“Please, I used to plow fields by hand!” Ma laughed. “You ain’t nothin’ compared to the feckin’ horse that I had to break in when I was five!”

“Ma, stop bullying Luna, I’m sure she was joking!”

“So? She’s my niece in-law and she made a bet.” Ma giggled. “She is rather soft, I’ll tell ya that.” She finally relented and let go of Lulu. “Don’t test the will of the Irish, will ya? We don’t have monarchs for a reason.”

“Jesus bucking christ,” Luna groaned. “All I did was say you were a little chubby!” Lulu started hiding her eyes with her mane. “I take back what I said, M’am.”

“Good!” Ma went off to go chat with Cadance now, who was done babying Dave. Within moments, she and Cafance were pressed into each others side.

Twilight was the first of my Ponyville friends to speak up, though. “Source, is this… your family?” She asked.

“I told y’all, right after I kicked the shit out of Chrysalis. I wanted to find a way to bring my family to Equestria.” I smirked. “This time, unlike the perfect piece of toast, I had some help. You should also know me by now, Twilight. When I want something done, I will get it done. I will reach a goal no matter how fucking much I’ll struggle with getting there.” I spread my wings. “And I’ll get through regardless of how unlikely it is that I will.” A small smile made its way to my face. “Finally, that ‘do or die’ mentality paid off, huh?” I held Katie close, seeing as she’s the only one that stuck by me.

Well, Dan did too. In fact, they both got under my wings before I closed them. They were nervous.

“These are…”

“This is Dan,” I nudged the teenaged colt under my right wing. “This is Katie,” I nudged the teenaged filly under my other wing. “That is Dave,” he had sauntered off from Cadance and was harassing Luna for cuddles. As in he wanted to snuggle with her, and she was more than willing to oblige... He found out about pony puppy eyes already. “And you just saw me Ma manhandle Luna.”

“Your brother is rather handsome,” Rarity pointed out.

“He doesn't even have a cutie mark, Rarity. Don’t even try it; I’m waiting until they’re eighteen even if they have their marks, before I let anyone near my siblings.” I said sternly. “If there is one thing to be taken seriously from me, Rarity, it’s that I will defend my family until I’m dead.”

Katie nudged me. “Kodi, you’re getting warmer,” she said. “I think…”

“Ah,” I chuckled. “Forgot that my wedding ring gives me the ability to warm up or cool down based on me mood.” I shrugged. “So…”

Rarity giggled. “Source, I fully understand where you are coming from, though when your brother is older and has his mark, do not be surprised if I try to court him.” She gestured to Katie. “Your sister is exceptionally beautiful; that particular shade of yellow is very pleasing on the eyes. You understand how many colts you’ll have to chase off?”

“Eeyup. I threatened to fuck Blueblood with his own cock when he got ready to hit on her.”

Fluttershy’s ears shot up. “W-what?” She asked. She then processed what I just said. “Oh, Blueblood, nevermind. He tried hitting on me too… He was rather crass and-”

“Me and Apple Jack broke his legs,” Rainbow interjected. “You can hurt any of us,” she then gestured to the only other pegasus in her group. “But anypony that touches Fluttershy is gonna get it hard!” Everyone in their group nodded. “Granted, we’d defend each other no matter what anyways, but you get the point.”

The doors cracked open again and we all watched as Blueblood snuck over to where Ma was… he smacked her ass.

“Oh…” Twilight whistled. “Should we stop this?”

“Mmm,” Ma broke a window using Blueblood’s face, and broke another one before throwing him out of it. She was cursing up a storm too.

“LEARN HOW TO TREAT A LADY YOU CRETIN!” She shouted down… The west side of the castle was luckily the side over a courtyard. Ma grabbed the snack table, after gently removing everything from it, and then tossed it out the window she tossed Blueblood out of. A loud thud and my poor, poor nephew yelping in pain told me she nailed him with it. “Fuckin’ hell. Yer lucky my husband’s not alive or he would’ve plowed a field with yer feckin face and cooked you into a sloppy joe!” She shouted out the window.

She blinked before smiling sheepishly. “Do I gotta pay for the window?” She asked.

“No,” Celestia shook her head. “We’re gonna charge his family’s estate again. He’s in debt, by the way.” She giggled. “Are you alright, dear? I don’t think I’d take too kindly to anyone slapping me like that, save for your son.”

“Oh trust me, I’d only let my husband do that,” she sighed. “That won’t happen, though.” She watched me as I poked my head out the window, before summoning another crowbar, before shoving that up his ass. Ma, and the rest of my siblings stuck their heads out the broken windows to see what see did. They all laughed at Blueblood as I took another crowbar and attempted to neuter him with it.

Well, I woulda if a bunch of guards didn’t drag him away, with the lead-guard guy said he was getting charged with sexual assault.

Author's Note

character sheet for Source's family, save Celestia, Button, and Luna eldest to youngest:

Maeve/'Ma': Basically a forty year old mare, colored just like Source is. She is taller than him by just a head, and is rather muscly for a unicorn and has an exceptional talent for magic that she can't quite control yet. Basically, she's everything Source isn't, tall, large magic reserves and fit. Ma is a business mare at heart and her cutie mark, two shaking hands, reflects this. She's also like a mother bear, being very, very protective of her children.

Source, he Source, a thing that exists. If you somehow don't know who Source is, and you've read this far, Source is an alien from the planet X1-7b901a. he likes horses.

Daniel/Dan: The eldest brother, though second oldest son in the Code family. He's a teenaged colt, sixteen years old to be exact. Danie's got an orange coat and a cyan mane. While he and Source are close, Dan is the most bonded to Maeve and is a 'mamma's boy'. He has no cutie mark yet.

Katie: Source's sister and the third oldest child in the Code family. She's a fourteen year old filly, after coming to Equestria, and is essentially a younger Source with her colors being an exact pallet swap of her brother. Yellow coat, blue mane. Out of everyone in the family, she is the closest to Source and the two often spend a lot of time together. She has no cutie mark yet.

Dave, the youngest of the siblings is a cyan furred, orange maned colt that's roughly ten years old. He is quite young and 'runt sized' though nobody's noticed yet. He usually stays quiet, and 'is the only one of us with a braincell' in the Code family. He has no cutie mark yet, and out of everyone, will be adjusting to Equestrian life the most. He's already made best friends out of Button already.