//-------------------------------------------------------// What Happened To Discord? -by Art-Going- //-------------------------------------------------------// //-------------------------------------------------------// You were the bestest friends I could ever ask for. //-------------------------------------------------------// You were the bestest friends I could ever ask for. I couldn’t believe my eyes… the pain, the suffering— the trouble I went through… everything I had hoped to uncover turned into a bittersweet end. “I know, unbelievable right? How could the Lord of Chaos feel the need to end his life? Honestly, I don’t have an answer for that. Things just don’t go our way sometimes. Life has a funny way of telling you that whenever you hope for something good. That’s why we’re always told to never get our hopes up.” I bit my lip as my eyes watered, and I had started sobbing so hard I could barely read the letter. “It’s silly isn’t it? I know by the time you girls find me, chances are you’ll think I’m playing some sick joke on you guys in order to see “how much you care about me”... and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but that’s not how this story is going to end. Twilight, Fluttershy, Apple Jack, Rarity, Pinkie, and Rainbow Dash… whichever one of you read this first: I am okay. Sure, I’m dead, but chances are… I’m at peace. Mourn, yes, but don’t grow depressed. I’ve lived thousands of years, but out of all the centuries I’ve lived, I have never been as happy as I’ve been with the six of you. Kind of contradicting when it comes to what I’ve done, right? A little, but hear me out.” I was honestly considering ripping the letter up, tossing it away, and never looking at it again… but I knew I needed to finish it. “I’m the Lord of Chaos… the embodiment of Discord… and the Spirit of Disharmony. I have never fit in with your bundle of friendship, harmony, and peace. A creature like me has no place in a world built to be perfect. I know, I know, you shouldn’t ever worry about what everypony thinks… but for me? It was overwhelming. I just couldn’t handle the reminder that I was meant for nothing. I’m sorry. I really am. It’s not my intention to hurt any of you, you know that.” But you did, Discord. You did. By the time Luna opened the portal again, both her and Dash took note of my shaken-up appearance. They didn’t even have to ask what was wrong, because by the time I stepped out of his dimension, I was already a mess. "I love you. I love you all so much. And if I really want to be honest… You were the bestest friends I could ever ask for. Thank you. - Discord." Author's Note Little shorter this time, but that's all I got for now. I'm gonna try to write more in the next few days but this weekend I'm pretty busy. Hope you enjoyed! <3 //-------------------------------------------------------// What Happened To Discord? //-------------------------------------------------------// What Happened To Discord? “Did you blame yourself?” The voice yanked me out of my thoughts, my pupils constricting slightly as I glanced up at the stallion. “I… beg your pardon?” “Well, it’s quite common for ponies to feel a sense of guilt. Especially in these situations.” “W-what kind of situation are we talkin’ ‘bout here?” “The suicide.” — “I appreciate the help, y’all. It ain’t the same without Granny Smith around… the family’s takin’ their time to mourn and it’s nice to have a helpin’ hoof every once in a while.” My teeth clamped onto the basket, carrying the load of apples towards the barn. “Of course, AppleJack. It’s the least we can do.” I watched Twilight pick some of the apples up with her magic. She turned, smiled at me, and continued with picking. I took a few steps towards her before a hoof stopped me. “Maybe you should go rest…” I heard Fluttershy’s timid voice behind me, “You’ve been overworking yourself, and… you need time to mourn too.” “I’m okay, Fluttershy… it was bound to happen soon and… well… I don’t want to keep the farm in a rut just ‘cause of her passin’. She would’ve wanted me to keep things runnin’.” “Hey! I know who can help!” Pinkie jumped seamlessly out of nowhere, “Discord could help us get this done in a quick snap with his fingers!” “Good thinking, Pinkie. Anypony willing to—?” “Oh! Oh! Me! I am! Pick me!” Pinkie Pie jumped from place to place, raising her hooves as Twilight scanned the rest of our friends. She sighed, looking over at Pinkie. “Yes, Pinkie?” “I wanna go get him! I do, I do!” She giggled, opening a portal to let her inside his dimension. After watching Pinkie jump immediately through, she turned towards us, “Alright. Rarity and AppleJack, you handle the North side of the farm. Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy can handle the West, and Spike and I can handle the East. Once Discord gets here… he and Pinkie can handle the South!” — “Darling, you look like you’re quivering, perhaps you should rest?” Rarity suggested. I shrugged, positioning my hind towards the tree stump before kicking the bark. A few apples fell to the ground, and I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Noticing my discomfort, she began nodding, “I suppose you wouldn’t want to talk about it, either?” She picked one of the apples before looking over at me, her eyes darted behind me, and she adjusted her body to look at what was happening. “What?” I mumbled before turning to face what she was seemingly staring at. The rest of our friends surrounded Pinkie Pie, who was sitting down and hyperventilating. In a quick moment, Rarity and I made our way towards her, listening in on what the other girls were asking of her. “Pinkie? What’s wrong?” Twilight looked concerned, but I could tell she was getting frustrated due to her unresponsiveness, “Pinkie??” Fluttershy sat beside her, leaning closely as she began whispering under her breath. Fluttershy’s eyes suddenly widened, and her body jolted upright before suddenly moving behind Rainbow Dash. “What? What did she say??” Dash turned to face her, looking for some sort of explanation. She glanced up at her before her eyes met Twilight's. She opened her mouth to speak, but instead of her voice coming out, it was Pinkie’s. “It was everywhere…” “What was?” Dash asked. “Blood. Blood was everywhere… a rope… a saw… bruised all over.” It was almost as if she was talking in riddles, “A corpse.” That made my heart drop. “You’re speakin’ nonsense, Pinkie. What in tarnation are you on about??” I finally found my words, voicing my thoughts out loud. “He’s dead.” Everything went silent. The only sounds that seemed to land in my ears were the sharp noises of birds singing, Pinkie’s trembling breath, and the occasional hum of wind blowing through the trees. Twilight looked as if she was about to speak, but instead, she walked into the portal, obviously deciding to look for herself. As she finally returned, she looked distraught and confused, her eyes glued to the grass. “Spike?” She began, her voice rather silent and cracking, “I need you to get Princess Celestia. Now.” — “I doubt anypony would've ever guessed somethin' was going on inside that head of his. Hell, I don't think even Fluttershy could've. He seemed happy. Laughin', smilin', jokin' like always. So to suddenly hear he's dead out of nowhere? It catches a fool like me by the tail. The investigation ended up being abandoned not even a week afterward... everypony had just assumed he had just killed himself. It didn’t seem right. It didn’t seem like him at all. But I suppose that’s what anypony would think if it happened to ‘m. Excuse my potty mouth, but everypony was actin’ like a son of a bitch those first few days. I heard my fair share of ponies callin’ him selfish, and I did my best to ignore them. But once they started makin’ those empty rumors on what happened, I drew the line there. Some of ‘m even started sayin’ Pinkie Pie killed ‘m and covered it all up in a suicide act. Those… fuckers… are the reason Pinkie Pie doesn’t even bother leavin’ Sugarcube Corner anymore. She doesn't even talk to us at all, not even Fluttershy… and I know him and she was close, but I know Pinkie's takin' it the hardest. She keeps havin' those nightmares about that night, and even Princess Luna can't stop 'm.” “I can't even imagine what she saw... and it ain't like I want to anyway. But she ain't the only pony with nightmares. Those damn screams… hollerin’ bloody murder.” “She was screaming after she saw him?” the stallion asked. “No. This had to’ve been a week after…? I don’t remember. She wanted to stay the night at the farm with me… scared of being alone. I couldn’t refuse… I mean how could I? She was horrified. But that night… oh that night… I was helpin’ Big Mac do some chores and that’s when I heard this… blood-curdling scream. Nightmares happen, I know… but this was somethin’ you’d hear in a horror film, doctor. I ran up to check in on her but… She was gone.” “Gone? Could you elaborate?” “What more is there to elaborate on? She was just– gone. As if she wasn’t there in the first place. I went lookin’ for her everywhere… and it wasn’t like she just ran away– the window was locked and her door? Well, it was locked too.” “Are you sure this wasn’t your nightmare?” “Are you seriously suggesting I made this up with my head? I don’t lie, doctor. I know damn well I was awake.” “Very well… continue.” “As I was sayin’... I… I looked everywhere for her. I found her in the barn and she… this wasn’t normal, doctor. Dilated eyes, quivering lips… now I don’t know what she saw, but it was beyond a standard nightmare.” “Night terrors… it’s plausible in her case. But let’s move on, how’s the rest of your friends taking this incident?” “Twilight’s been makin’ more-so a fool of herself… she’s been more irritable and I know the whole ‘stages of grief’ nonsense but it ain't like her. Rarity’s been givin’ away practically everythin’ that reminds her of him, and I think it’s starting to scare Sweetie Belle… I think I remember hearing Apple Bloom mentioning it a few days ago. She’s been lookin’ into spells and all that crap, which I expected more from Twilight. Rainbow Dash? Hell… every pony’s been thinkin’ she just doesn’t care. Didn’t cry at the funeral, didn’t even act like it affected her at all. I know ponies mourn differently but…” “And what about Fluttershy? You stated he and her were close?” “Right… yeah… she’s been– well better than now, but I think she’s still in shock.” “And how about you?” The mention of me sort of caught me off guard. I figure rambling about all my friends was quite disruptive, considering the therapy was a tool for all of us… ordered by Princess Celestia to help me through this mourning process… not a tool to ignore my own. “I don’t know how I feel… sick… sure, but I feel like my head’s exploded and a hammer was tossed into my chest. And I… I don’t know how much longer I can ignore it.” He nodded, “Well, that concludes our session for today…” The abrupt change in tone made my brows furrow as I glanced up at him, almost as if I was rudely interrupted during an important conversation… which I was. “I want you to take the time to think about your feelings, however, Apple Jack. You’re right, it’s unknown how much longer you can put up with it… but focusing solely on your friends’ feelings will only make your own more unbearable. In the meantime, I wish you a good rest of your day.” “Very well… doctor.” I stood, making my way towards the door before mumbling beneath my breath, “Thank you.” Author's Note First chapter! Hope you enjoy this so far, I've been honestly obsessed with the idea. I also want to note that I actually have been drawing some art that goes along with the story, which can be found on my Deviantart of the same username. (Definitely optional but feel free to check it out <3) //-------------------------------------------------------// Do you even hear yourself right now? //-------------------------------------------------------// Do you even hear yourself right now? “Pinkie? You here?” I walked into Sugarcube Corner, my nose scrunching as I looked around for her. The first floor was empty, void of any other ponies and herself. I made my way up the stairs and that’s when I saw a corkboard full of photos, news clippings, and red string that conjoined them all… something you’d see in a police station over a murder. “Apple Jack?” I turned around, noticing Pinkie Pie as she walked towards me. “What’s all this?” I asked, looking back up at the board. The conjunction of photos and clippings was rather confusing… They were vastly different from each other, but the more I looked into it, the more I realized how similar they were. “I was just…” she shook her head, “It’s nothing.” “Sure? Doesn’t look like nothin’.” “It’s just— if I tell you, do you promise you won’t tell anypony else?” “I… okay.” “Promise, Apple Jack. Please?” “I promise.” I felt a lump form in my throat, I couldn’t imagine what she must’ve found out or even thought about that made her so terrified to tell anypony else. I didn’t even notice how tense my body was till she walked downstairs. “I don’t think he killed himself.” She abruptly said, looking out of the window by the front door before locking it. “What?” “You know how Princess Celestia refused to let anypony in his dimension? I… snuck in during the investigation. Nopony was there but… I… I don’t think it was his doing.” “Wait what? Do you even hear yourself right now, Pinkie? Do you even realize what you’re suggesting? You think he was murdered?” “I don’t know what I think… I haven’t been able to think straight since…” I stopped her from completing that thought. “Which is exactly why this is nonsense!” I stopped, realizing my tone was a bit overboard, “Pinkie look… I-I know this is hard for you, it’s hard for all of us, but you’re hurting yourself more than you realize. Clarity, it’s what we all want, but they confirmed it was suicide.” “They didn’t confirm anything. They stopped the investigation ‘cause they couldn’t find any evidence that it wasn’t. But just because they couldn’t, doesn’t mean that it isn’t. Besides, If I recall correctly… I saw a rose by his body.” “And how could a rose determine he was murdered?” My brows furrowed, at this point, I figured this was just a way Pinkie was coping, but it was getting more and more concerning the more she spoke. “Remember that prank we did when we all gave Discord a bunch of Valentine's Day gifts… saying it was from a bunch of different ‘secret admirers’? And then Discord got sick for a few days after Rarity got him roses?” “Didn’t he say he was allergic?” “My point exactly. Discord refused to get roses for Fluttershy that day, and it’s why Fluttershy refused to use roses for his funeral.” “…and what else did you find…?” I didn’t want to encourage this kind of behavior, but the more I thought of it, the more intrigued it made me. “You remember how the funeral was a closed casket? I think I know why, and it wasn’t because they didn’t want us to be more traumatized. If that was the case— every funeral would have a closed casket. But listen— when I saw his body… his neck looked almost ripped open. If it was true he hanged himself, his neck would be bruised and broke, not cut open.” “And how do you know that hoof-saw he used to cut himself wasn't used to... you know?” “I doubt it… it didn't look intentional and it was just on the corners of his neck. And... you remember when the case was closed early? The Noble Council ordered it to be. I think they’re hiding something… I don't think Discord would do this, and even if he thought of it, I’m sure he would’ve left a note or even told somepony about it. Look I know this is a big stretch but I seriously think something is off about this.” I thought long and hard about a reply… some parts of me wanted to encourage this search, and even offer a helping hoof, but the other? My gut twisted and turned, almost instinctively telling me something wasn’t right. I finally decided on what I wanted to say, and I let out a long sigh before meeting her eyes, “I… I don’t know, Pinkie Pie. This just seems crazy. And if I’m to be honest, I think you should just stop this search for answers… ‘cause chances are, you won’t hear what you want to hear.” “I—I’m not lying!” “And I ain’t sayin’ you are, but Pinkie… this ain’t helpin’ you and you know it. A-and if anypony else saw you like this? Frantically searching for evidence that supports murder? You’ll scare them, Pinkie. It’s hard enough as it is, but that'll just hurt everypony else as much as it does to you.” “I thought you’d believe me…” “I believe that this is… hard for you.” Her nose scrunched, “Gah— stop saying that!” She suddenly snapped, “I know everypony thinks I’m just some crazy… bitch… with hallucinations, but I know what I saw!” “I ain’t calling you crazy I just—“ “You just what?” She turned away from me, “You wanted to check in on me? Make sure I’m not spazzing out on the floor with foam in my mouth like some feral timberwolf?” “That’s not what I’m sayin’.” “No, that is what you’re saying!” She looked back at me. “That ain’t what I’m sayin’.” I repeated. “It is! You and everypony else think I’m so traumatized that I can barely talk anymore, and that whatever does decide to come out of my mouth is nothing but stupid misinformation.” She stopped, sighing before turning away yet again, “I’m scared, Apple Jack. I… I loved him so much and now he’s gone. And I think that if I had just talked to him more… and had gotten there sooner, maybe he’d be alive right now.” I honestly had no idea what else to say. I thought up over one hundred different sentences to say but the moment I finally opened my mouth, all that squeaked past my vocal cords was a simple: “I’m sorry.” “Just go, Apple Jack. I’ll be okay. Thanks for checking in on me.” I nodded. I knew it was too late to try to press for more answers about this strange idea, and she was too frustrated to commit to small talk, so I just turned around and approached the door. “I’ll— I’ll check in on you tomorrow, okay? Maybe we can go out somewhere…? And I’ll… I’ll try to listen to this idea of yours.” “Really?” She cleared her throat, “Okay… that sounds good, Apple Jack. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I let out a scoff, a small smile appearing on my face before I finally left the building. I won’t lie, it was odd. The closed-casket despite Fluttershy’s protests, and the whole ordeal of Discord one day deciding to just kill himself… it was sickening. But maybe Pinkie was wrong… My therapist would always say that depression has multiple faces—one of which being a façade of happiness. //-------------------------------------------------------// The Castle of Friendship. //-------------------------------------------------------// The Castle of Friendship. The Castle of Friendship always seemed out of place compared to its surroundings… it seemed more relative to the Crystal Empire, or even Canterlot rather than in the middle of Ponyville. I won’t lie, I much rather preferred the old Golden Oak Library to this... My hoofsteps clicking on the crystallized floor echoed through the halls, my eyes darting around the castle as I attempted to gain sight of Twilight Sparkle. Once I finally saw her, I approached slowly and carefully, since she was flying towards the higher end of the bookshelves. “Uh, Twilight?” She jumped, her wings failing her as she fell onto the hard surface. Spike ran up to check in on her, and I cringed as I saw her stand back up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” I continued. She shook her body, her wings stretching and fluttering, “Yeah, that’s alright. It’s hard getting used to these when you’ve been a unicorn your whole life.” She looked up at me, a slight smile crossing her cheeks, “What did you need?” “Ah, I was... just stoppin’ by to check in on you, things have been tough and—“ “Apple Jack,” she began, causing me to pause and give her a questioning look, “Yep, I know the drill: have I been doing okay? You should stop worrying so much about everypony else, it’s going to drain you.” “A true true friend helps a friend in need.” I smirked, watching as she let out a soft giggle, “Is that a yes then?" I assumed. "I don't suppose I can feel any other way. It's not like I can stop time... it still goes on, even if nopony wants it to." I nodded, "I suppose the Princesses are taking it as well as you then?” Her smile faded, the sudden change in tone catching her rather off guard, “I don’t know. I never asked. But, if you really wanna know what I think: I think Princess Luna is taking it the hardest, the stars have been dimming more and more every night, and it’s starting to worry me. Princess Celestia hasn't been replying to any of my letters and it's... well... frustrating." “Well, maybe they need time to mourn too.” "I guess." She continued her work right then and there, organizing books like always. It seemed more like an escape route from the conversation rather than a genuine necessity. Upon seeing how distant she began acting, I shrugged, “Sorry, I don’t mean to make the mood worse by mentionin’ it.” She gave me what looked to be an empathetic look… till she spoke up, “Look, I… I don’t want to be... that pony, but I’m kinda busy and I don’t want to talk about that. So if you can, it would be nice if you could leave.” I nervously laughed, my cheeks flustering and my head burning as I felt suddenly embarrassed, “What?” It was all I managed to get out, unable to understand why she’d say it like that… I understand not wanting to talk about that stuff but… “I mean, do I have to repeat myself?" she suddenly interrupted my thoughts, "Look just— leave alright? I have enough things to be stressed about, I don’t need to stress about whatever’s going on with you too.” “I… I beg your pardon? You ain’t the only pony that’s stressed Twilight—!” I stopped, knowing yelling would only escalate the tension more. “I just came in to check in on you, not to rant about my bullshit. So don’t worry about me sitting you down and sayin’ ‘poor pity me’ the whole time, Twilight. I don’t spend enough time sitting around to even listen to my thoughts—let alone share them with everypony else.” “But that’s what you’re doing?? I’m not stupid. You can pass that as the truth to everypony else but you can’t lie to me, Apple Jack.” “Ain’t it ironic to tell the literal ‘Element of Honesty’ that she’s lyin’?” I shook my head, “Look I get it. Not wantin’ to talk about that stuff and all, but there’s other ways to say that—and it not involvin’ literal insults to the other pony. If you want me to leave then that’s fine, I get that, but don’t take your anger out on me… cause I played no part in this situation.” She didn’t reply and kept her back turned to me. Nevertheless it answered my question. “Unbelievable…” I mumbled under my breath before taking a swift turn towards the door, and as I finally exited the castle, in my head I wished I hadn’t been so hard on her, but it was true. Her tossing her anger onto me wasn’t healthy for either of us, and it was better to hear the brutal truth from me, than to wait and unintentionally lash out at Pinkie or even Fluttershy. ...Regardless of who it could’ve been, it was good she got this wake-up call beforehand. Author's Note Little short, but I've been wanting to work on other things as well. I might post another chapter tonight or tomorrow so keep a look out for that! I'll try to keep the chapters around 1k (at least) going forward. //-------------------------------------------------------// The Carousel Boutique. //-------------------------------------------------------// The Carousel Boutique. The Carousel Boutique had been closed for quite some time, obviously due to Discord’s passing, but Rarity still kept somehow overworking herself. It was heartbreaking if I'll be honest. I was still rather distraught and frustrated from the argument with Twilight, and I even considered avoiding contact with anypony else altogether... but I knew it would be nicer to listen to a pony with a generous hoof... than a pony with a hoof stuffed up her rear. I love Twilight... but damn. By the time I entered the building, however, I was met with Rarity’s ecstatic movements and fluctuations… along with Sweetie Belle’s concerned and fearful expressions. “Is she alright?” I mumbled to her, watching as Rarity used her magic to move everything around, writing notes saying ‘for sale’ and completely ignoring my presence. Sweetie Belle shook her head, “She’s been like this for the past few days…” “Alright, let me talk to her, go on to your room.” I ordered, and after she was finally gone, I spoke up again, “Rarity, you alright?” “Oh! Darling, you mustn’t scare me like that. I am doing— perfect, absolutely perfect, 100% perfect. Yes, yes, of course, of course.” Her voice was highly pitched and rather quickly paced… and then it hit me. The dilated pupils, the dark circles under her eyes, and her rather malnourished body. I was about to speak up again when I noticed her nose was bleeding. I cleared my throat and she seemed to have known what I was implying instantly, groaning and wiping her nose rather aggressively. “Stupid thing— hold on.” After she then wiped it away with a tissue, she looked back at me, “Alright! Is there anything I can help you with, darling? I’m on a rather tight schedule today and I—“ I interrupted her, “You’re on it again.” “Pardon?” “Don’t play dumb with me, Rarity. What’d I tell you about using that damn drug?” “Like you know a thing or two about how it helps me!” She snapped, but quickly got out of it, “I… I’m sorry. I’ve been trying to stop it’s just— look I…” she sighed, sitting down on the ground, “I’ll stop using it. Tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow...” “Yeah? Well… it ain’t that simple.” I sat beside her, “If it helps… you’ve been better than you were when— you know.” “It’s just hard… losing him. Especially when everypony talks circles about how ‘Equestria is free from his chaos’… it’s not a joke alright? He’s dead. He— for Celestia’s sake, he... killed... himself. Have some sympathy. Is everypony here as heartless as a Changeling?” “I know… I know I hear it too. They’re just— they didn’t know him like we did. I know for sure if it was somepony they loved, they wouldn’t find it funny either.” “I’m sorry… this must be so hard for you. Losing Granny Smith and then on top of that—Discord? How do you even do it?” “I... I don't know, but don’t worry ‘bout me, alright? Let me do the worryin’.” “But you shouldn’t have to. You focus so much on everypony else, you’ll barely have any time to focus on yourself… you’re drowning yourself and you don’t even realize it… and you won’t until it’s too late.” Rarity sighed, “And maybe that’s what happened to Discord.” “What do you mean?” “Discord always focused on us… what we needed to learn, what we worried and relied on. Not once have I ever heard him say he needed help. It was always about us…” she shook her shoulders, “Maybe… maybe if he had just said something to us— anything at all— he’d still be with us.” “Well, there’s no tellin’ what would’ve happened then. For all we know, he could’ve planned this whole thing out. I don’t think we’ll ever know what was going on in that head of his… or even how bad it had to’ve been for him to even consider that.” “I loved him so much, Apple Jack… I can’t believe he’s gone.” “Hey, look at me, Diamond.” The nickname rather instantly caught her attention, “We all loved him. He was our friend… our family. But he would want us to move on. It ain’t gonna be easy, I can tell you that already. But as long as I’m here? It’ll all be okay.” “You’re a great friend, Apple Jack.” Author's Note If you cant tell I headcanon AJ having rather specific nicknames for some of the Mane 6. I also just realized how short this is compared to the last one (my bad, I've been trying to keep them at around 1k but if I can get my point across even with just 700+ words then I'm happy) //-------------------------------------------------------// Stormcloud //-------------------------------------------------------// Stormcloud I was walking towards the Apple Acres when a sudden storm cloud appeared above my head. My heart dropped, and I found myself yanking my head upright to see if it was really true. As the gray hues answered my question, I sighed, looking down with a rather annoyed expression, “Rainbow Dash.” I mumbled. She poked her head over the cloud to look at me, “Oh come on! That makes you laugh any other time.” I glared at her, which made her understand, “Oh. Right. Sorry.” She jumped off the cloud, which vanished due to the sudden movement. I grabbed my hat and wrung out all the water before finally placing it back on my head. “Where ya off to?” She asked, nudging me with her hoof. “Home.” “Aw, come on, you didn’t wanna see me?” I shrugged, “I don’t know.” I did want to see her, Fluttershy too, but I was already stressed enough and didn’t wanna push that stress onto them. “You don’t know? But I’m your best friend!” I could tell she was just trying to tease me, but as I kept my eyes forward and my head hung low, she suddenly looked concerned. “You… you alright?” She asked. “I… I don’t know.” I repeated. “I’m sorry… I didn’t think that would trigger you.” I sputtered, “Ah, don’t worry, it ain’t that.” “Then, what is it? I’m here, you know, if you need to talk.” “Don’t worry ‘bout me. How have you been doin’?” “I’m not answering till you do.” It frustrated me, but I sighed and decided to comply. “I’ve been fine.” “Fine? Usually when ponies say they’re fine, they don’t mean it.” “I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout this no more.” I stepped forward, but she got in front of me. “Please, Apple Jack. I don’t like it when you push me away.” “I ain’t pushing anypony away. Do you see everypony coming to me asking if I’m okay? No, I go to them. So how is that pushing ponies away?” “You’re pushing everypony away from how you feel. That’s how. You don’t have to worry about everypony else, you know that. It’s unhealthy and I just— I just want you to open up more.” I sighed, shrugging my shoulders before sitting down, “It’s just… I was always so tough on ‘m… and I just—“ “You think sometimes it’s your fault? That maybe if you were just… nicer?” “That he’d be alive. I don’t know, Dash… none of it makes sense.” She sat down in front of me, “It never does honestly. But when somepony does that, ponies are always quick to blame themselves.” “Or others…” I said with a rather cold tone as I glanced back at Sugarcube Corner. “When these situations don’t involve them, ponies like to play detective when things don’t add up to their standards; but sometimes ponies just don’t see the point of it anymore and decide to end it all.” When I didn’t reply, Rainbow Dash took note of my silence and didn’t push me for a reply. She kept quiet, letting her words sink in till I spoke again. “I miss him. It ain’t easy… none of it is.” “I know. You have me though, Apple Jack, if you need anything. You can always come over if things get hard; I’m always here to listen.” “Thanks, Dash. You’re a good… you’re a good friend.” “I know.” She smirked, playfully smacking my hat down to cover my muzzle. “I always do my best.” I couldn’t help but laugh as well, even if it was just a few chuckles. Author's Note Been a while! I put this on hiatus for a while due to personal things, but I should be back now! Yeah, this one is a little short, and I honestly didn't expect it to be, but I've got a few longer chapters coming out (1k+ chapters!) //-------------------------------------------------------// He Did It //-------------------------------------------------------// He Did It “Pinkie Pie. I’m here.” I called out. Even after a solid five minutes, there was no reply. Assuming she was upstairs, I nudged the door open with my body, which seemed strangely hard till I realized a chair was pushed underneath the handle. “The hell??” I mumbled underneath my breath. We had practically planned this whole day out, why was she now trying to keep me away? The whole building looked trashed, the windows boarded and a… a blood trail led upstairs. I bolted upstairs, my heart now racing as I feared the worst. “Pinkie Pie?!” I stopped, her room was empty and almost all of her furniture was tossed and thrown about. The faint sounds of a tub running sent an eerie chill down my spine. As I stepped towards the room, my heart might as well have jumped completely out of my chest… and once I finally entered the room… it dropped. Her lifeless body laid in the tub, her blood trailing down the sides of the porcelain, but what scared me the most was the message painted with blood above her: “He Did It”. — I could barely even hear the sounds of everypony else talking, as loud as they were. My eyes were glued forward, and everything around me felt like a vessel of fantasy… It felt like I was living out a nightmare in real time, a long and cruel nightmare sent to punish me… Was I being punished? “We’re gathered here today to mourn the loss of a beloved member of our society… Pinkamena Diane Pie, also known as Pinkie Pie amongst her peers and closest of friends.” I think my mind purposely pushed the whole church service out of my memories, I don’t think I can recall anything aside from one… strange… detail. A closed-casket. My brows furrowed. Maybe she was right… Maybe something fishy was going on here. I suddenly stood up, the attention landed on me, but I didn’t care at this point. I squeezed through the rest of my friends before walking down the aisle towards the exit. The doors slammed shut behind me, and I could hear a mumble of voices beyond that door… obviously gossiping. I could barely take a few steps down the stairs when the door whipped open again. At first I ignored it, continuing down the flight of stairs when an easily recognizable voice spoke up behind me. “Um, hello??” It was Twilight, “What was that? You just made the decision to waltz out? You embarrassed everypony in there–” I scoffed, yanking my body to face her, “I embarrassed them? Twilight, listen to yourself for once. Ain't it strange? Discord dies of supposed suicide, and suddenly Pinkie Pie does too?” “She… look I don’t have an explanation as to why she’d do that, but chances are she couldn’t handle the memory, let alone all the medications her psychologist kept testing on her.” “I spoke to her yesterday, Twilight. She was fine.” “That’s the thing, Apple Jack. You can never always tell when somepony is going to do that… there’s different sides to–” “Oh for cryin’ out loud, you sound like my therapist.” I growled, turning away from her in an attempt to shut her out. “Well they sound like a reasonable pony.” she sighed, “Look… I know this is hard for you. You and Pinkie were close, but–” “But? But what? But you need to move on? Let it all go? I saw her body, Twilight. I saw the message she wrote. I saw everything. I can’t just–” “Message? What message?” My ear flicked, and I found myself looking back at her. Did she really not know? “They didn’t tell you ‘bout that? She wrote ‘He Did It’ on the wall out of her own blood. I– this is what I’m talkin’ about. Nothin’ is making sense here and I think the Noble Council is part of it.” “Okay… Apple Jack, I think you just need a minute. Just… I’ll talk to you later alright?” I heard her hoofsteps fade away till the door of the church swung open before slowly closing behind me. I sighed, “Figures, nopony believes me…” I sat down, “I… I should’ve listened to you, Pinkie Pie. I should’ve just sat down and listened. And now? You’re gone.” I slammed my hoof on the concrete, letting out an ounce of my anger, “Gah— I don’t get it, Pinkie! Why would you do this? Why would you—“ I stopped, “Unless you didn’t…” My ears dropped and my eyes widened, and suddenly a realization washed over me. I made a run towards Sugarcube Corner, sliding past the caution tape that covered the doorway and upstairs towards the cork board Pinkie Pie had made. “Hey, what are you doing—“ the sudden appearance of Rainbow Dash scared me, causing me to yelp before turning back at her. “Sorry. I— are you okay?” After calming my nerves, I nodded, “Fine. Why?” “Well I saw you run out and… huh?” She walked past me, glancing up at the cork board. “What’s this?” “I don’t know.” I shrugged. “She must’ve made it after Discord passed. I asked her about it and she started talking in riddles, saying how she believes Discord didn’t kill himself at all. Then all of the sudden Pinkie “kills herself”? It makes no sense Dash.” “You saw her, didn’t you? She cut herself in the tub. That doesn’t just happen—” “I know. But Pinkie’s told me before how she’s terrified of cutting when I confronted her about her binge eating. That’s why she overeats as a coping mechanism.” “Well maybe she just tried it? It wouldn’t surprise me if she did, considering what she saw. Maybe she was hallucinating and they “told her to cut herself”…? I dunno. Kinda…” She stopped for a minute. “…hey.” I glanced over at her, “Hm?” “Does that look like a pony to you?” She pointed at a photograph. The photo wasn’t related at all to whatever Pinkie was trying to figure out. It was just a normal picture of Discord with Pinkie. “What do you mean?” I asked as I watched Dash walk up to the board, standing on her hind hooves before pulling the photo off with her teeth. She then placed it on the nearby table before pointing at something in the background. “That.” My eyes followed her hoof, and as I looked closer in the forest background… my heart dropped. “Hold up now.” I moved closer, placing both of my hooves on the table as I peered at the photo. A silhouette of a pony stood in the back… eerily watching Pinkie and Discord. “When was that?” I tapped my hoof on the picture a couple of times before glancing at Dash. “A few days before he died.” “You’re kidding.” “No. I remember. I showed up there like ten minutes after this photo was taken. Why in Tartarus would a random pony just stand there and stare at random bystanders from the Everfree Forest?” “Unless it wasn’t random at all and they were there for a reason.” “Exactly.” “Rainbow Dash? Apple Jack?” I heard footsteps from downstairs. Dash quickly covered the board with a white sheet before Twilight walked into the room looking rather confused and angry. “What are you girls doing here? You two can’t be here.” “Twilight, come look at this.” I ordered, looking back at the photo. She ignored me, focusing solely on Dash: “I expect this from Apple Jack, but you too Rainbow Dash? Our friend is dead and you’re playing Fetlock Holmes!” “Uh well, in my defense I was coming to check in on AJ.” “Well stop it! I can’t keep wandering around worrying about everypony else. I’ve already got Princess Celestia on my mind as well as Princess Luna, and now they’re saying there’s a chance of a total Solar Eclipse this upcoming weekend! With the sun blocked out the crops aren’t getting enough light, and no crops means no food.” Twilight was rambling on about quite literally everything and nothing all at the same time. “You do know Solar Eclipses occur for like… five minutes right?” Dash asked. “You’d think if you worried that same amount for Pinkie instead of pushing her away, she’d be alive right now.” I bluntly stated. “Excuse me??” Twilight stepped forward, causing Dash to walk between us. “What she means to say is—” “You heard me. You always pushed her away. Every damn day you’d push her away, tell her she’s insane, say she’s off her meds. Whatever you decided was wrong that day—you told her. It was never about her. It was about you. And now? Even when she’s dead you still make it about you.” Twilight didn’t say a word. Which was good, maybe she was realizing how awful she’s been to everypony. But despite wanting to hear an apology, I didn't want to get my hopes up too high for one. “Anyways…” Dash begun, “Now that we got that out of our system—” “You know, I don’t get it.” Dash sputtered as Twilight interrupted her, “I don’t understand how you’re so stuck up to think I don't care about anypony but myself. I’m a princess. I have more responsibilities, more expectations, I don’t have time to mourn regardless if it’s Discord or Pinkie.” I scoffed, “What’s the difference? Was Discord not considered a friend to you?” “Discord is complicated.” “Oh now he’s complicated. First it’s “I don’t want to listen to your problems” and now it’s “complicated”? Do you understand how narcissistic and selfish that sounds?” “I’m selfish? I’m not the friend that ran out of the church before they could even take her to get buried. I’m not the friend that is so in denial about her death that I’m playing murder mystery.” “Just look at this Twilight— look at this and tell me this ain't strange…” “She committed suicide, Apple Jack!” She suddenly screamed, “There’s nothing fishy or weird going on, so stop it. You’re hurting yourself and everypony else because you can’t accept that they’re gone! They’re dead, AJ. Dead. And yes, you do need to let go… before you end up dead too.” Noticing her tears, I didn’t say a word. Despite opening my mouth, I only sighed and kept my maw shut. After a good few seconds she turned around before walking down the steps. Dash stepped closer to me, “Hey… you okay?” I inhaled sharply, almost making myself dizzy. “Yeah. Yeah I’m good. Don’t worry ‘bout me.” “Rainbow Dash, come on. At least one of you will say goodbye to her before she’s underground forever.” Twilight called out to Dash, who was hesitant to move till I nodded her out. I flinched when the door slammed, but as I glanced back at the covered cork board on the wall, my brows furrowed. “I’ll fix this, Pinkie. Regardless if they’re with me or against me.” Author's Note Longer chapter this time at almost 2k words eep. I didn't think this one was gonna be so long, but I couldn't find a good enough stopping point for a hot minute. Also if you can't tell I've kinda stopped over exaggerating AJ's country-side talk. Sometimes I add it but sometimes I don't. I guess I just kept getting tired of re-reading and editing it to sound more "country" lol. //-------------------------------------------------------// Sugarcube //-------------------------------------------------------// Sugarcube I felt a nudge on my shoulder, causing me to mumble incoherently and grumble annoyingly. The nudge got more prominent, and after a few more tries of getting me up, I finally raised my head. I stretched my hooves out, taking note of the messy table I had slept on. Paper strewn about, scissors barely cut through a piece and red ribbon stretching practically everywhere… and even a tipped over cup with faint traces of apple cider staining the glass. I looked back at the cork board behind me, which I had moved from Pinkie’s to the farmhouse. I turned my head then to my left, seeing Big Mac there and even lil’ Apple Bloom behind him. “Sorry… I must’ve… dozed off.” I mumbled, turning my head towards the window on my left, acknowledging the time. It wasn’t nearing nighttime yet, nor was it close to dusk… perhaps 6… nah… 7:30? My eyes stretched back to Big Mac, and after a minute of staring, I realized what I had planned on doing today. “Shit… yeah, Granny’s meds.” I had postponed organizing Granny’s old medication for a while now, considering the circumstances… but I knew nopony else in the family would do it till the farmhouse was put up for sale in about forty years. I got off the chair slowly before nodding my head towards the medicine cabinet, telling Big Mac to meet me there without saying a word. I then walked towards the back of the house and towards the laundry room. After switching over the load and grumbly yawning, I turned around to see Apple Bloom standing at the doorway. “Hey, sugarcube.” “Are you okay?” she asked. I could tell she was genuinely worried about me, and as I smelt the alcohol on my breath, I stepped back to keep her from noticing as well. “Just peachy. Hey, wanna do me a favor and bring your clothes down? I got more room for a few more shirts or so.” “What’s that stuff on the board for?” she suddenly changed the topic, catching me rather off guard as I glanced back at her. “It’s uh… nothing you need to worry about, alright? Your big sister is just… researching some things.” I could tell she knew what it was for, but even then I didn’t want to tell her. So, instead, I decided to be vague. “Okay.” As she continued standing there… looking rather out of place and awkward, I spoke up again. “Anything else?” “Well, it’s just that— I’m worried about you.” that nearly broke my heart. “You got school to worry about, Apple Bloom. You don’t have to worry about me, I’m alright, I swear. Now run along to bed… it’s a school night. I gotta take a shower before your brother and I go through Granny’s old things.” “Can I help?” “Not tonight, sugarcube. This aint like the old antiques we went through a few days ago… and like I said, you need to be in bed.” “Fine…” she mumbled. I could’ve let her help… but going through medicine wasn’t something she needed to be doing. Especially at her age. It wasn’t something I wanted her to be introduced to. After finally getting my shower done, I headed back to Big Mac, who had already gotten started on looking through the various medications Granny had been on before her passing. Most—or all of them—had very complicated names and/or were completely incomprehensible. “Prinivil… Microzide… How do they come up with these names? They might as well use a random generator for these things.” “Yeup.” My brother agreed. “Vicodin. Ain't this a pain reliever?” I asked. Maybe that one wouldn’t be too bad to have around. Would obviously need to stay in the filly-proof container I got for Granny. Big Mac peeked over my shoulder as I held it up, “Yeup.” As he continued placing some of the meds in the cardboard box to dispose of, I couldn’t help but slide the Vicodin into my hat. I could’ve just said I was gonna save it, or done something else entirely in that situation… but for some reason I took the more suspicious and sly route. During the whole ordeal, I noticed how Big Mac then began staring at me. “What?” As he continued, I realized what he was doing. “I’m fine, Big Mac. I’m just—” I glanced towards the cork board by the table, which was a few steps away from the countertop. “I can’t seem to wrap my head around it, Big Mac. Not that they’re gone… I know that. I mean I don’t understand how none of it is adding up.” “Nope?” “Nope…” I heard Apple Bloom run over, and after a second I knew why. – I closed the closet door, sighing heavily before saying, “No monsters, sugarcube.” “It wasn’t a monster.” her voice was shaken up, sending an eerie chill up my spine. “No? What was it then?” I asked. “It was Discord.” I felt my heart skip a beat when she said that. “H-huh?” I couldn’t help but feel shaken up as well, and as she pointed out the window… I peered through the curtain. I suddenly jumped back, my heart dropping as I saw the dark figure of—you guessed it—Discord staring right back at me. It was dark outside, devoid of color. The only bit of light touching his fur was from the flickering barn light. I couldn’t see his eyes, that or they weren’t even there. I ran downstairs, past Big Mac, and right through that back door. I searched and searched, but nothing. Nopony nor him was there. My heart was pounding out of my chest, and I felt a nauseous feeling build up in my chest. I glanced about, and by the time I looked back at the forest, the sudden appearance of his face— which was covered in maggots, worms, and beetles. His skin was rotting, peeling at the edges. His eyes were gone, replaced with dark sockets dripping of black blood. I screamed, jumping back in fear only to suddenly wake up in a hospital bed. Author's Note I actually have a drawing that semi goes with this, but it isn't done yet and will most likely be posted on my DA. //-------------------------------------------------------// Princess of the Night //-------------------------------------------------------// Princess of the Night I screamed, jumping back in fear only to suddenly wake up in a hospital bed. Dash immediately grabbed me, holding my shoulders as she tried to calm me down. “Apple Jack, you’re fine. Listen to me, you’re okay. Alright? I’m here.” “Wha– where am I?! What happened?” “You’re at the hospital… Big Mac brought you here.” “Huh? Why? Wh… what happened?” I asked again. “Apple Bloom said you came upstairs to her room talking about monsters… then all of the sudden you looked out the window and screamed before running downstairs. Said Big Mac found you trembling in the barn mumbling nonsense.” “No… no she— she said she saw Discord. I— I saw Discord.” “No, Apple Jack. You didn’t. The doctor said you were hallucinating. They did some tests and said you had alcohol in your system and was drunk.” I shook my head, “I… I could’ve sworn I felt sober. I don’t understand. That’s never happened before?” Dash could only sigh, and after a second she hugged me. It took me a minute to realize she was crying. “Dash? Is something wrong?” “I… I didn’t know what to think. I wake up and all of the sudden I hear you’re in the hospital and I… I was scared that maybe you— I thought…” she began sobbing, causing me to wipe her tears with my hooves. “Hey. Hey. I promise you I’ll never do that. Especially to you, stormcloud.” I hugged her, “I’m so sorry I scared you.” “No. Don’t be. I’m just glad you’re okay.” Silence fell between us, and the only thing I could seem to hear was the beeping of the heart monitor, and the shuffling of ponies outside the room. “I don’t suppose the girls are here?” I broke the silence, causing Dash to glance over at me. She shook her head, “No. Fluttershy was too scared to see you, worried… you know. Rarity thought the worst and almost tried to overdose till she had a heart to heart with Sweetie Belle; she promised she’d quit and well—she’s starting to make good progress since she went to see a doctor this morning. Twilight…” she paused. “Is complicated.” I finished her sentence, causing her to repeat me. “Is complicated… yeah.” she smiled for a second, finding it rather funny and ironic at the same time. Out of nowhere her expression changed, being replaced with a rather dull frown. “She does care about you though. I kn—I know she has a hard way of showing it, but she does care. She’s just… angry.” “At who? Me?” “Herself. I’m sure the pressure of being “Princess Perfect” isn’t helping. If I were in her horseshoes, I’d probably be angry too.” “But to push us away? That ain’t helpin’ at all. She’s got all this stress, sure, but who doesn’t? Pinkie’s dead, Discord’s dead, who’s next this time? Me? You? Rarity? I mean come on… we’ve lost enough as it is, pushing us away ain’t gonna make the situation any easier for her.” “I’m aware, Apple Jack, but you know she won’t listen. She wouldn’t even hear us out when we tried showing her that stupid photo.” “Do you seriously think that’s a pony though? I mean— ain’t there weird stumps or even trees that look that way sometimes? Maybe we’re just looking too far into it.” “I’d rather be wrong and know for sure… than right and—” “—and not know at all.” I finished her sentence, “That’s a good point.” I stopped for a minute before shrugging, “But would anypony even listen to us?” Dash shrugged as well, “I doubt we’d even get the opportunity to take this stuff to the Noble Council, considering they’re the ones who dismissed the case.” “What about the Princess’?” “Twilight said they’ve secluded themselves since Discord’s death. Princess Celestia probably won't even budge if we tried talking to her… she’s already on edge from the solar eclipse.” “Right… so our chances are slim when it comes to talking to them then.” Dash nodded for a second before furrowing her brows, “What about Princess Luna?” “What about her?” “Well, since Princess Celestia’s been hibernating… Princess Luna’s practically taken over Canterlot and all the duties that come with it. If we can talk to anypony, she just might be our best shot.” “So what’s the soonest time I can get out of this place?” — Canterlot seemed rather dull at this time of year. The Gala was supposed to happen this weekend, but was obviously canceled due to Discord—and now Pinkie’s death. The streets were full, yes, but leading up to the castle was barren and quiet. The guards let us pass, and as we walked down the halls of the castle, we could already hear Princess Luna yelling at somepony. “How many times must we repeat our words, Prince Blueblood?” I peeked past the wall, noticing Princess Luna speaking to a familiar white stallion with a yellow mane. “We hath spoken to the council a number of times, and until Duke Venture retires, you are hereby not allowed inside the court. That is final.” “Your majesty, I—” I was rather curious about his reply till Dash washed him out by whispering in my ear. “Isn’t that the jerk that spit out your apple fritters the first time we went to the Gala?” “Ugh, don’t remind me.” “Do we need to repeat again, Prince Blueblood?” Princess Luna asked, her tone definitely louder than his. “No? Then I suggest you wipe that incompetent grin off of your maw and do thine job.” When the stallion finally left the hallway, Dash and I stood up straight. “Princess Luna. Can we speak to you for a minute?” Dash asked. “We would, but we’re very busy at the moment.” “Please? It’s about Discord.” I said. Princess Luna paused for a moment, sighing before motioning us to follow her. “It has not been the easiest of days nor nights for either of the Princess’, Apple Jack and Rainbow Dash. The days grow colder in the midst of summer, and nights feel warmer than the fortnight of autumn, and thy Princess of the Sun has yet to leave her slumber.” “I’m sure Discord and Pinkie’s passing isn’t helping any.” I said. “Tis not. The death of Discord and Pinkie Pie has taken a heavy toll on our hearts, and we hath yet to see either of them in thy resting place.” “So you’ve also been hibernating in a way. Y’know, Twilight told me the stars were growing dimmer. Is that at all relative to what’s been goin’ on?” “Perchance you recall an old legend; the tears we cry paint the night sky, one that may answer thine questions?” “Uh… sure?” Dash shrugged as I glanced over at her. “Excellent!” Princess Luna then entered her bedroom (sus), allowing us inside. “Now what art thou wish to speaketh about?” Dash and I glanced over at each other, slowly getting used to her way of speaking. “Well… Princess…” I was about ready to explain when Princess Luna let out a soft giggle. “Oh. Perchance you wisheth to refer to me differently? If we join your courageous journey, we must not waste thy breath on titles. HENCEFORTH, thou shall nevermore address us as our role of royalty! Call me Luna.” Dash, who was standing behind me due to Princess— or Luna’s yelling, gulped before peeking over my hind. “Great… can we lose the formality too… and maybe the yelling?” “We—! I mean… I may attempt to speak in a more colloquial fashion, yes.” she blushed, smiling and hiding her face. “So a couple of days ago Rainbow Dash and I were looking at this old cork board Pinkie must’ve started using. We were looking over it and we noticed this…” I held up the picture of Discord and Pinkie. “I see nothing out of the sort?” Luna mumbled. “Sure, but if you look closer…” Dash pointed at the figure in the forest. Luna looked confused, glancing up at the both of us before using her magic to pull the photo out of my hoof. “Where was this taken?” “Somewhere along the edge of the Everfree Forest… I got there like ten minutes after. Why? Do you recognize them?” “This is Duke Venture. The Noble Council and my sister granted him as the Duke after his duties of a guard surpassed many expectations. The first ever non-royal stallion to be granted such a role.” “Wait, and this Duke Venture, was he the stallion that dismissed Discord and Pinkie’s case?” I spoke up, genuinely starting to believe this is our guy. “Yes. ‘Tis true.” “Okay, now I know this is a bit of a stretch, but hear me out. What if they didn’t commit suicide?” “You are suggesting…” “What if they were murdered?” I elaborated. “Such nonsense! Nopony would ever harm another—” Luna stopped when she saw our expression, “Right. Is there perhaps substantial evidence aiming towards this claim?” “In a way, yes. I actually brought the cork board to the farmhouse, if you’d like to see it. Just in the dining room—” “I moved it to the barn.” Dash suddenly interrupted me. “Huh? Why?” I glared at her for a second. “Apple Bloom.” “Ah.” “Perhaps I will stop by this weekend where we can conjure up a plan to investigate.” “Investigate…” I mumbled before getting an idea, “Woah— hey. Luna, Maybe we can pop into Discord’s dimension? Search around for things that may seem out of the ordinary.” “With Discord… things were always out of the ordinary.” Luna sighed, looking away for a moment. “I know, but you and I know damn well if he was alive… he’d do the same for us. Pinkie too.” Luna looked back up at me, her eyes appearing similar to glitter, as they were filled with untouched tears. “If we’re right, Luna, we’re catching that son of a bitch.” — When Luna opened the portal, I felt a churning in my gut. “I only have so much time before my sister finds out I opened the portal, I would make this quick if I were you, Apple Jack.” I nodded, stepping into the portal. I heard Dash wish me good luck before it closed, and then there was silence. I stood right at the front door, my hooves barely fitting on the ground below me. I was hesitant to open the door for the longest time, almost frozen in place… begging he’d open the door instead. A minute had passed, and after snapping myself out of it, I walked inside. It was dark, damp, and wreaked of a mixture of blood and mold. I turned my head to my right, my eyes immediately falling on the blood stained carpet. I didn’t even want to think of it nor imagine his body in place of the dark figure settled in the fabric, but my mind didn’t seem to help either. I didn’t even realize I was crying till I felt a cold tear slide down my cheek. I wiped it away instantly, looking ahead and for signs of… anything really. After a few slow, deliberate steps, I finally kicked into high gear, running rampant around the house and searching drawers and closets, high and low for signs of a struggle, leftover evidence, or even identity markings. My hooves skimmed over just about every single surface the house had on offer. I even lifted up his mattress to look underneath, but with a loud groan and a sign of loss— I slammed the mattress back down before sitting on my hind. I sniffed barely on the verge of crying when I heard a piece of paper fly past my nose. Opening my eyes, I glanced over at the piece of paper. Hopes, worries, prayers and answers— all of it came flooding down before I read the first words on the note. “If you’re reading this; I’m dead.” //-------------------------------------------------------// It's done. //-------------------------------------------------------// It's done. [1 year later] The days that pass by are somewhere above nothing, but miles below okay. Things have honestly taken a turn for the better, but in a slow-paced kind of way. Sweetie Belle had a party—a birthday one to be precise. And while every pony was laughing and hollering happy birthday… I don’t know. I felt strange… a placeholder of my own body or a pony watching their life go by without any control over it. But I wasn’t gonna let that stop anything… I was happy, I am happy. I couldn’t let these strange feelings take over. — I walked into the barn, immediately noticing the white cloth draped over the cork board in the back. I knew I needed to get rid of it, but for some reason I wasn’t sure if I was ready yet. I needed to let go, of course… it had been a whole year since then, but I just… I couldn’t. Not yet. I walked past the board, heading over to the bags of chicken feed, an eerie giggle swept past my ears. “Pinkie?” my instinct immediately spoke aloud, but as my mind caught up, I shook my head and turned back around. “Gah... it’s 90 degrees out here, AJ... you’re overheated.” “Hiya AJ!” the voice... the fucking voice. It was hers. I tripped over my own hooves as I yanked my body towards the noise, my body slamming against the dirt and gravel as my heart raced. No pony was there. “Breathe, AJ. You’re freakin’ yourself out for no damn reason.” I pushed myself up, my heart stopping as a figure stood at the top of my peripheral vision. I didn’t look up. I couldn’t. Not when the hooves in front of me were colored pink. “Stop doing this...” I muttered, closing my eyes tightly to try to tell myself it wasn’t real. When I opened, the figure was seemingly gone. I exhaled, my focus returning to the chicken feed when my muzzle met face to face with Pinkie’s. Her eyes were... dead looking... and her mouth? Blood was pouring out, pooling at her hooves and barely touching mine. I choked back a gasp, scrambling back and screaming: “Leave me alone! Stop it! Please just stop!” “AJ..” the voice called out. “No—no go away. You’re not real. You’re fake. Y—You’re dead!” “AJ!” the voice called out louder, and suddenly my body was shaking. “Snap out of it!” Almost on cue, I was yanked out of whatever trance I was in, my eyes met Rainbow Dash’s as she shook me awake. “Wha... Rainbow? Where… I—” she didn’t speak. I think if anything she was as speechless as I was. “What just—” I asked after a few minutes of breathing repeatedly in and out. “Are you okay?” “No.” I blatantly said. “No, I don’t… I don’t know what just… I… I saw her, Dash.” “Who?” I didn’t respond at first, my eyes lowering to the dirt as I tried to recollect myself. Did I seriously see her? “Pinkie.” I finally muttered. “Pinkie?” “Yeah. I saw Pinkie.” I gulped, closing my eyes as I took a deep breath in, my ears focusing solely on the birds around me as I smelt the fresh hay and feed. “Okay… okay let’s get you inside. Maybe you just need some water.” Dash helped me up, noting my trembling hooves. “Can you walk?” I nodded, leaning on her slightly for support. Her wing instinctively wrapped around my frame as she muttered comforting phrases in my ear. — I sat on my bed. I did nothing but just… sit there. After a minute I finally grabbed my hat, tossing it aside before hearing a shudder of noise crossing the wooden boards. I glanced over, noting a familiar bottle of pills. Vicodin… I got up before grabbing the bottle. A couple wouldn’t hurt right? Maybe it’s just a fever… overexertion or overheating maybe. I grabbed the glass of water before swallowing a couple, getting back on my bed before sitting back down again. “Oh dear Celestia… What's going on with you?” I muttered. “What’s wrong with you? You’re just tired… seein’ things. Just breathe you idiot…” I began fidgeting, my left-hind hoof shaking. “Dammit” I muttered before grabbing the bottle again, taking a few more and setting it down rather aggressively. “You’re fine. It’ll all be over tomorrow.” I mumbled. The fidgeting got worse, and I groaned annoyingly before yanking the bottle off my nightstand, glancing down at the 10 or… hell 15 pills left. It won't hurt, my brain said. Take more. You’ll be fine. It’ll stop the fever… the chills… the voices… everything. I dumped the whole contents into my maw, chugging the rest of the water as I struggled to swallow the rest. I gagged as it began to dissolve, but it didn’t stop me. After I got it down, I groaned and shook my head, trying to ignore the disgusting taste. The shaking got worse. Everything got worse. “Fuck.. fuck.” I coughed, shaking my head left and right as my hooves shook underneath me. I stood up before tumbling off the bed, gagging and choking. I spat out a few undissolved pills, the foamy texture making my mouth taste even worse. The gagging began to burn my throat, my esophagus turning raw as I tried to cough up what I had just swallowed— and all of the sudden— almost immediately… I felt nothing. No pain, no feelings… just total euphoria… I blinked rapidly, although it felt rather slow. It was like I was underwater… floating. It’s okay now. It’s finally over. It’s finally done. Author's Note Shorter chapter this time, and I couldn't help myself to include a little cliffhanger :) //-------------------------------------------------------// Why? //-------------------------------------------------------// Why? Things seemed fine that day. Sure, she told me she was seeing things again but knowing how hot it was outside, I just assumed it was the heat getting to her— we all did. When I got home, I hung out with Scootaloo. I took her out for ice cream, played in the park, and had a race all the way home. I made sure to keep my wings tucked too… and I was honestly surprised and proud of Scoots when she beat me. That night we watched a movie, ate some dinner, and went to bed with no worries and care… and then I got the call. I had hoped… maybe—just maybe somepony found her before… but then they confirmed it happened that night. The night where I was so carefree… the one night I decided not to check in on her. And now? Now… I don’t know. I sat in the waiting room of the hospital with Scootaloo, Big Mac, and Apple Bloom. I stared off into space, numb and panicked. What if we were too late? What if she was… No. I couldn’t lose her. Not her too… please. I beg you. i can’t lose her too. i cant… please — By the time the doctor came back through… I could just see it in his eyes. The pain, the urge to just tell us it was all okay… that she was okay. Big Mac took a glance at me, almost as if he just heard the answer. Instantly, my eyes watered, and I buried my head in his shoulder as I began to wail. This was it. She was gone. She had done it. Why? You promised me. You promised me you would never do that. You lied to me. You lied, AJ. //-------------------------------------------------------// Promise me. //-------------------------------------------------------// Promise me. “She’s in a coma.” the words that exited his mouth took me out of my thoughts, my eyes immediately glancing up at him in shock. “I… should’ve added that part first.” he cleared his throat nervously. “She’s alive…?” I asked, my voice trembling. As the doctor nodded I was quick to jump up, trying to run past to reach her room— only to get held back by Big Mac. “Woah, woah… listen. She’s in a coma, alright? She’s unresponsive. We’re doing the best we can to wake her up, but please be patient with us, alright? We don’t know how long she’ll be out for.” “Fuck you! Let me see her! I don’t give a shit if she can’t talk, just let me fucking look at her!” I sobbed as I yelled at him, trying to shove past them, “Let go of me! Let me see her!” I slowly stopped fighting against Big Mac, wailing as I collapsed to the floor. “Please… let me see her while she’s still alive… I— I can’t just leave without seeing her. What if she— what if…” Big Mac pulled me into a hug, Scootaloo curling up beside me afterwards. As Apple Bloom hesitated, Big Mac stood to comfort her while Scootaloo remained beside me. I hugged her instantly. “I love her. I love her so much. Please.” The doctor sighed, “Just… give me five minutes. I’ll speak with one of the nurses and they’ll accompany you.” he began walking away, “Your friend will survive this.” “She’s not just my friend,” I mumbled, “at least… I don’t want to just be her friend… I want her… I love her… I can’t— please don’t let her die.” — My eyes adjusted to the light as I opened them. I curled up, mumbling softly. “Apple Bloom, turn that dang thing off…” I groaned, only to hear a gasp nearby. My brows furrowed as I sat up, glancing around the room before realizing I was in a hospital. Before I could ask Dash, who was now in front of me, I had been instantly kissed by her. My eyes widened, but I was quick to return it. She hugged me tightly after, causing me to let out a weak chuckle. “Well… they weren’t kidding when they said “Taste the rainbow”.” I retorted playfully, hearing as she laughed through her tears. “I’m okay, Stormcloud.” I hugged her back, “I promised you, didn’t I?” I pulled back to look at her— she was a sobbing mess. “I’m not leaving you… especially not now.” my hoof grazed against her lips before I pulled her in for another kiss. “I love you, Stormcloud.” I mumbled against her lips. “I love you too..” she said back, hugging me again. “Promise me, AJ.. promise you won’t scare me like this again…” “I promise.” — When I got out of the hospital, I was hesitant on returning to the Apple Acres. I loved the place, don’t get me wrong… but it wasn’t good for me. So, as girlfriends do, Dash and I got a place together in Ponyville… and things were looking great for us. Her lips grazed against mine as she cuddled beside me in the bed, smiling as she curled up under the covers with me. “Long day?” I asked. Rainbow had actually become a Wonderbolt not that long ago— or more specifically a Wonderbolt mentor. “Like always.” “Well… you’re home now.” She giggled, “And that just so happens to be the favorite part of my day.” As she curled up against me, I laid my head down on the pillow, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead as I wrapped my hooves around her. “Finally, we got somethin’ in common.” I laughed. “How’s Scoots?” “Good! I just feel bad since she can’t fly and all.” “Don’t. I can’t either.” Dash smiled… only for it to vanish instantly, “I know it hurts her though.” “It would hurt any pony… but she’ll adapt. She’s a strong filly.” “How’s Apple Bloom?” Dash asked. “She’s… better. I know seeing me kind of puts her in a spin sometimes… after all that— shit. I don’t even know what went through my mind I just— I was fine beforehand I don’t understand why it even happened.” Dash sat up, leaving me to sit up too. “That’s the scary part… you don’t know what you’re doing till it’s too late. I just don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell any pony.” “I would’ve if I knew it was gonna happen. I’m an honest mare, Dash, I don’t lie.” “Well… maybe you didn’t lie. Maybe you were just so focused on every pony else… you forgot you needed to help yourself too.” My eyes met Dashie’s, and my eyes nearly widened at her revelation. “Damn… I guess I never thought of it like that. Maybe you’re right. I just— I didn’t want you girls to drown yourselves in your sorrow ‘cause that’s what you were doing. I guess while trying to save you from drowning, I forgot how to keep myself afloat.” “But that’s okay… it’s okay to get submerged every once in a while… you just gotta reach the surface again. I want you to tell me whenever you get overwhelmed like that. I know it’s hard to detect with you, but even if you’re just overwhelmed in work or— anything really. Tell me. I’ll help you, and so will the rest of our friends. Twilight, Rarity, Fluttershy.” “Fluttershy…” I thought for a second, “damn. I haven’t even seen her since…” “Since he died. I know.” “Fuck— and that note… we forgot to show her.” “Shit. I guess we both wanted that out of our heads.” “We gotta tell her, Dash.” “We will tomorrow. For now? We need to rest… you need to rest.” I smiled, “Well then goodnight. I love you, Stormcloud.” “We sleep in the same bed, dumbass… I’m still here.” she playfully smacked my shoulder before laying down. I followed, kissing her cheek. “I love you too.” she said.