To Chase The Shadows of Redemption

Twilight surveyed the mossy roof of the cottage under the lingering dying light of a sun dipping below the tree line not too far in the distance. Amidst the cobblestone and it's lush exterior, a cyan glow had begun to fade away as the final touches were graced on its finalized structure.

"Exactly like that! Anti-rain enchantments were popular until the more modern designs came out, but some more pompous folk still use it while preferring antiquated properties. It's amazing how a spell thought to be born out of frustration with pegasi prankish bullying became so universal."

"Let's see if it works."

"Well we have to wait until it..."

Luna's horn re-lit, and shot what looked like a cyan lightning which had been rejected by the ground back forth into the heavens. There was a slight flash that came with it in the sky that lit up the entire world around them, and after a few moments clouds had gathered and began to swell. Twilight knew that there was applications of magic she couldn't even conceptualize yet, but this felt like something else entirely.

Rain poured forth and both Twilight and Luna made for the overhang which also provided a view of the sides of the building at the entrance. As they expected, rain had not penetrated inside on inspection and pooled off the sides of the roof elegantly.

"I thank you. But I also feel as though I should've known such an enchantment existed, and yet it feels forlorn to me, like many things now..."

She was frowning, but before her frustration could become something Twilight cut in.

"Perhaps we should start a fire? I don't know about you but the nights have gotten cold as of late, I know you built that fireplace but I think we should get the temperature rising now so it's warm before it gets closer to the time we sleep."

"You're right, and I think there isn't much to do out here now that its started pouring. I'm not sure it'll clear anytime soon now that I've started it. Best we prepare for a cooler night."

They were both sitting on skeletal wooden chairs at the table, both of which had been recently assembled. They stared outside through the gap in entrance and rectangular hole in the wall that represented where glass should layer soon. The rain created a pitter-patter that reverberated off of the roof of the building softly, and it would've been a serene soiree if the comforts had been anything if bare bones.

"How have you been for food while you've been out here? I can't fathom there's been anything appetizing too close by."

"I... have gone without for so long, I... suppose I had a few raspberries I found on a flight near here."

Twilight opened her bags and immediately started looking for the food she had purchased in town, she pulled out a wrapped up daisy sandwich and immediately offered it to Luna.

"Try this! It's quite fresh still, and I have other food left over. You must be starving, even if you can last so long without anything. Please, it's the least I can do."

Held out in her hoof, it became entrapped in Luna's magic and quickly floated over to her own. Unwrapping it, she gave it a tentative sniff. The ecstasy of senses dormant for longer than the totality of most lives reigniting must have overwhelmed Luna, as her previous reservations about anything related to this strange new pony in her life vanished immediately as she started scarfing it down. Two minutes later and panting from not breathing enough during the inhalation of food, she appeared to remember Twilight existed, and quickly went to wipe her mouth and regain a more dignified posture.

Twilight couldn't not help but laugh at that.

"It's alright, I know they're delicious. I picked it up specifically after all."

Luna finally spoke up again, "Perhaps I have been missing out on some of the finer details of living sorely lacking in my absence. Ahem, that was quite delicious, thank you."

Twilight once again pulled opened up the bag, but this time a book floated into view. While she wanted to continue to learn more about the mare just across from her, she would have to force herself to do something else than put pressure on the mare. She decided reading was exactly that vice.

Luna left to go gather more firewood.

The fireplace crackled and popped occasionally, a warm glow through most of the quaint surroundings. It had been lit earlier, but had been allowed to die out until now. Both mares had their chairs facing the fire not too far away, vision absorbed in the blazing glory that was ever shifting and shuffled close, for the reprieve from the cold outside.

"Luna," Twilight began gently, her voice aimed to soothe had become a near whisper in the near silence, "I know your time spent on the moon was... beyond difficult, but I want you to know you can talk to me about it. I'll listen to anything you have to say."

She slowly looked over to Luna, who had bit her lip hard, and she could tell that this was something that tore up Luna inside to even reminisce about. Before Twilight could back track an answer came fourth.

"It was a time of darkness, despair, pain and sorrow," Luna murmured, still facing the flames, and her voice cracked halfway through. She shifted in her seat, and despite her being freer than she ever had, she looked no further removed from a spectral prison shackle invisibly holding her down. Eyes darkened. "I still can't believe I'm even back at all sometimes..."

She looked over to Twilight to match her gaze, "still I wonder why, why you care at all. It still puzzles me why you're here. I can tell you're a good pony at heart, which is why I have not sent you away, but that doesn't make it any less mystifying."

"Do you want the honest truth Luna?" she took a moment to think, "and because I'm a good pony I'm glad I'm here now that I've met you, but to answer your question, I came here with purpose to find you. Even after just meeting you I can tell you need help."

"Help?"

She narrowed her eyes, continuing: "I have no need of help, and I don't like where I think you're going with this. This has to do with my sister, doesn't it? She cast me into the abyss, and now she's sending her minions to find me so she can finish the job."

"No! Luna she loves you! How can you even say that! I—"

"Love?! Don't you dare throw that word at me! If Celestia loved me she would've worked with me! Allowed me to have the respect I deserve and gave me the position to prove myself! She chose our subjects over me! Hated me! Cursed me for having the gall to be jealous of what was righteously mine and ours! Would a pony who loves you submit you to... to..." she trailed off when memories too painful to be brought into light came to be.

She turned and faced the fire again, appearing to have said too much. After about a minute she resumed.

"Besides... my essence has changed. I shouldn't be near other ponies. It took a lot out of me to pull myself together enough to make it back to Equus in time. I can feel my power leaking and uncontrolled, who knows what will happen when I stop focusing on maintaining it like I have."

"I haven't felt like you've been out of control for even a moment, Luna. You're more capable than you know, and in better shape than you feel."

"Do you really think that is true, little pony?" She turned to face her again. "Do you really?"

A chill instantly ran down Twilight's spine. Darkened mist filled the air. Suddenly, she couldn't see Luna's face anymore, like a black hole had decided to up and steal the light coming from that angle. She couldn't shake the feeling of terror, as though there were spirits cursing her for every moment she stayed here. Blood rushed in her ears. Her vision enclosed into tunnel vision. Shadows surrounded her on all sides, closing in, hinting danger. They were ephemeral things, that when focused on She turned to look outside if to break the trance that threatened to take over her and made for the entrance at the same time, fear turned flight. She stopped as she saw the outside. The rain had stopped, and she saw wisps dance among the shrubbery and teal butterflies lazily wandering about. One of them landed on a flower, and she could swear she saw it wilt and die in real time only to fade back into the earth.

"See? Even you, who know me and had forewarning couldn't handle it."

Just like that, the world returned to normal. Twilight had to blink several times to reset and make sure things were back to normal. She was sweating, and it eerily felt like she had just woken up from a nightmare. Finally, she hesitantly turned back inside and sat back down. It took a while to collect herself, but when she was ready she didn't back down.

"I believe in you Luna, whatever... that was, I believe you can overcome it with time." Her hooves that were overlapped swapped, "You're going to have to face reality at some point Luna, but I understand how challenging this must all be after being away for so long." She yawned, "I won't pretend to understand even a modicum of your situation, especially since I only became aware of most of it only recently, but I want you to know that this isn't a world that will reject you, Luna."

Twilight returned to her seat by the fire, she only lasted about thirty minutes before she started to call it quits however, it had gotten very late.

"Goodnight, Luna."

Twilight made for the blankets and sleeping bag she had placed in the corner of the room to the unresponsiveness of Luna. Her exhaustion overcame her quickly, but before she passed out all she saw was the image of Luna rocking back and forth lightly before the fire that fought against the backdrop of midnight dimness. The side of her lip that was visible was straight, straight faced.

As the dead giveaway of snores came from the young mare, Luna's ear unfocused as she continued to stare down the dying flame.

For so long she had tried to avoid thinking about her life before now. Painful memories were best avoided. She hadn't expected someone else forcing her to remember to be so painful.

It was becoming clearer now that Celestia was going to force her way back into her life, and she hated it. She seethed. What value was there being a princess anyway? Being forced to take on the weight of a country onto your shoulders and buckle underneath? She had no connection with any of the ponies of modern Equestria anyway, if it was even called that still. She'd have to ask Twilight in the morning. She doubted Celestia would've changed it, though.

While painful, her time on the moon which had begun as a messy blur of a nightmare, one which she barely escaped from in the first place, had finally begone to consolidate and become clearer in her mind. She had grown frustrated with the times they completely overwhelmed her as though she was back on the moon, while other times could process it clearly and remain present. For whatever reason, Celestia had cast an unfinished divine banishment spell with the elements of harmony. She hated the elements of harmony now, and the distance remembrance of using them once was a gray counterfeit of one, as well as representing any of them. For so long it had crushed her that her sister had viciously chosen to leave the spell unfinished. The elements were absolute - they could not fail and provided nigh unlimited power in bursts. She doubted many things in her vague recollection, but that was not one of them, the feeling of that power and certainty of success.

She had asked the question to herself a million times, why did Celestia subject her to such torture? The spell casted fully would've kept her in a dormant state, sleeping away blissfully until it finished and safe. While she knew that her alter persona would've kept the reigns, that was infinitely preferable to what had actually happened, even if it ended with her taking control again. But no, the unfinished spell had sapped her strength down to the minimum and held her there and left her in a defenseless state, conscious for the torture to begin.

Not only did the unstable magic of the elements burn her cursed soul as it opposed her in nature, she was endlessly bombarded with radiation from the cosmos around her, including Celestia's sun. Under any other circumstances, this would've a negligible thing for Luna, but in her transformed state the damage was amplified greatly. Celestia also intensified the radiation coming from her sun at times, as though mocking her pain as insignificant and throwing oil on the flame. With no defense and her state of being having changed to the Nightmare, the light burned and boiled her flesh down to the bone countless times, but it was also a slow process. She was sure she would've mutated into some monstrosity and perished if it weren't for the protection of her divine nature. The Nightmare had fought an absurd amount of time to regenerate over and over, refusing to let it end. After several centuries, Luna's main personality re-awakened due to the pure strain the Nightmare had endured, and started fighting for control.

The funniest part was that they didn't fight for long at all, instead they had a shared goal, and the hatred between them had faded in the face of impending demise. Both of them had cursed Celestia for what she had done back and forth. When the Nightmare finally kicked the bucket and perished, Luna had been utterly heartbroken that her only companion had left her alone, even if it had been a blight on her being. Without the Nightmare to help her heal and survive, the experience became even worse. After so long being the nightmare and becoming free from it, the radiation mercifully hurt her a lot less. But she was so weakened by that point, it may as well have been to make it a fair battle again. Perhaps the pain was all mental from that point on? As an alicorn, Luna had an extremely resilient soul that would last an eternity. For the longest time she felt like as long as her spirit stayed strong, her soul would hold out. She had passed out at some unknown point in time, and she still thanks her stars for assisting her consciousness for bringing her back, so that when she was finally released she could teleport back onto the planet after she had healed the recent damage done while unconscious.

It was only when she got back on the planet that she had finally started coming to terms with her damaged soul.

The final glowing ashes remained as Luna remained seated there, in near pitch darkness, still showing no signs of movement.