The New Moon
“Is something bothering you, Luna?” we heard a voice call out from behind.
“Oh, hello Celestia,” we replied. “Nothing is wrong.” We looked out the window and saw the thin crescent hanging in the night sky, surrounded by countless shimmering stars.
“Really?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at me. “This isn’t how I remember you, you used to be so energetic and talkative. Are you sure there’s nothing you’d like to talk about?”
My sister approached us with her regal mane flowing behind her; the colours dim yet still more vibrant than our own. She wrapped her wing around us and pulled us closer, pressing our cheek against hers like she had done when we were fillies.
“Yes, we are -- I mean, I am sure...”
“Have the years separated us?” she asked suddenly.
“What do you mean?” We wanted to get out from under her wing, but we could not force ourselves to leave the warmth.
“What happened to you was my fault, but you haven’t complained once since your return last year. How is it that you can be so close to somepony with so much resentment inside you?”
“We do not resent you, Celestia!” we replied, laughing it off.
“Then why are you still calling me Celestia?” We stopped laughing. “When we were younger, you used to call me Tia, so why won’t you call me that anymore?”
We turned our face away when we felt it flush.
“It is childish, do you not agree?” we murmured. “We should not degrade ourselves by speaking like fill-”
“It’s not degrading when I’m your sister!” she retorted, forcing us to stare into her purple eyes. They were not as happy as they usually were -- they seemed distant, and distraught. “...But it doesn’t seem like I am anymore.” She let go of us.
“We -- I do not understand...” I mumbled.
“It’s been a year, and you’re still having trouble with raising the moon every night. However, you never let me help, no matter how many times I offer!"
With a sigh, we trotted out onto the balcony of our room. Leaning over the banister, we saw the homely darkness, the luminescent glow of my responsibilities, and the extensive silence.
“It is not something we -- I can do with ease,” I admitted with a sigh. Celestia stood next to me, gazing out over her kingdom.
“But we can do it together easily,” she persisted.
“That is not what we meant!” we said impatiently. “We -- I meant that I find it difficult to ask my elder sister for help. I am not a foal anymore; I should be more independent.”
"Don't be silly!" she scoffed. "The first time you raised the moon, I helped you, and it took you a full year to be able to lift it on your own! There's no reason to rush, take your time and recover. Regain your ability to summon the moon slowly, and in the meantime, I'll help you in whatever way I can."
"What if we become dependant on you?" we asked her. "What if we rely on you for everything, and we become incapable of doing anything on our own?"
"Why is that a bad thing? I'm your sister; it's my job is to help you when you need it."
"Really?" we questioned, unable to look at her with a straight face.
"Yes!"
"We find that hard to believe," we remarked, turning our face to the side.
"Why? Why is it hard for you to believe your sister?"
"We find it difficult to believe anypony when they are lying to us."
"I'm not lying though!" she insisted. "I want to help you! I've always wanted to help you! You just have to-"
"Is that why we were sent to the moon?" we interrupted. "We do not remember you helping us when we needed you to all those years ago, but is that not the job of the elder sister? To help the younger when she cries out to you?"
She stared at us in wide-eyed bewilderment, blinking furiously as her jaw remained slack.
"Why did you ignore us? Why did you turn a deaf ear to our pleas and our screams?"
"I-I don't know," she stuttered, taking a step back.
"If the job of the elder is to help the younger, then you were a terrible sister, Celestia!" we cried, stomping a hoof.
“You're right! And I'm sorry!" she retorted. "I should have been a better sister when we were together!” she cried. “Please, let me make up for my mistakes! Let me help you with the moon!” We turned our face away from her again, biting our lip.
"Raising the moon is hardly atonement..."
"Then you name the trial!" she demanded. "You tell me what it is I must do!"
We thought for a moment, imagining Celestia working on farms and sweeping the streets of Canterlot with nothing but her hooves. Sighing, we slowly shook our head from side to side.
"No, it's fine," we mumbled, with our eyes half closed and a small smile on our lips. "You can just help us raise the moon the night after tomorrow -- it will not shine tomorrow."
“Even if the moon doesn’t shine, you still have to raise it into the night sky,” explained Celestia, cocking her head. “Don’t you remember being upset about that as a filly?”
“Oh yeah...” we mumbled, scratching our chin with a hoof. “It must have slipped our mind... Well, anyway, we would like to raise the moon on our own on more time.”
"Great! Then I’ll help you the day after tomorrow!" She beamed at us. "And I can also help you on any other night! I promise, I'll always be there for you."
“We would never improve if we were to let you assist us whenever we had trouble performing what ought to be a simple task,” we chuckled. We headed back into our room and sat down on our bed. The smooth silk sheets were cold to the touch, but they quickly warmed up underneath us.
"But-"
"We can not let you spoil us," we interrupted.
"Why not?" she begged, trotting towards us.
"Because we need to learn how to do our job on our own. Your charge is the sun and ours is the moon; we should not let you take over our responsibilities!"
She heaved a lengthy sigh as she sat down beside us.
“You know,” she started, placing a hoof on our shoulder. “Before you were old enough, I was the one who had to raise the moon. You never complained about me doing your work for you back then.”
“We were fillies back then,” we replied, pouting. “We did not understand what it meant to be responsible. When we were younger, we also fought with the animals in the garden, you are not suggesting that we do that again, are you?” Celestia laughed.
“Why are you so different now?” she asked, still chuckling. “When I banished you, you were so naive, so impressionable, and you weren’t afraid to ask me for help when you needed it!” Her giggling stopped. “Did the moon change you?”
“We used to be like that, but we are not anymore...” we corrected. “Time goes on and ponies change naturally, Celestia.”
“Now, you seem to hate the idea of being what you were. Are you afraid that the same thing might happen?” Our eyes went wide and we felt our heart sink into our stomach.
“What do you mean?” we asked.
“Are you afraid that you might turn into her again?” she repeated, eyeing us with an eyebrow raised. "Into Nightmare?"
“That is absurd!” we boomed, suddenly jumping up and moving away from her. “We know that can never happen again!”
“So then why are you so reluctant to let things go back to how they used to be?” she asked us, getting up and trotting closer.
We could not lie to her.
“We...We are afraid.” we admitted.
“What of?” she continued to ask, holding us with her wing again.
“We are afraid of Nightmare.”
“So you are afraid of what happened a thousand years ago...” she affirmed. “There’s no need for you to feel fear, Luna,” she said, pulling us closer and sitting us back down on the warm, silk sheets. “The elements are no longer ours. Twilight and her friends control them now and they aren't able to banish you to the moon. You’ll never see that prison ever again.” We bit our lip.
“We are not afraid of that,” we murmured. “We are afraid of the other ponies.” we corrected.
“Why?”
“We are scared that they might get hurt again.” After pushing her wing away and sliding across the smooth covers we dug our face into our hooves.
“How will they get hurt?"
“We forced upon them the night that they loathed, do you not remember? Now we do not know how to live beside them, and we do not know how to be their benevolent ruler. We only know how to harm them, how to scare them, and how to breed their hatred for us...”
“Our subjects don’t hate you!” insisted Celestia, waving our words away.
“We find it unbelievable that they would not hate the monster we were...”
“But you’re not a monster anymore, are you?” protested Celestia. “You’re not Nightmare anymore, and everypony in Equestria knows that.” Her wings wrapped around us once more.
“They might still resent us, deep down in their hearts. They might reject us, and we might...We might retaliate...”
“I will never let that happen,” she assured.
“How will you stop us without the elements?”
“I’ll show you that you can stop yourself.” Her eyes were sincere.
“How will you do that?” we asked.
“By taking you outside, talking to you, and finally being your big sister!” she declared.
“You were always our big sister...”
“Are you sure? It certainly doesn't feel that way.” We felt her wing hold us tighter.
“For a thousand years, we waited for the day that we would return, not so that we could see our sister again, but so that we could force eternal night upon the world. We are the ones that are at fault, and we are the ones that should be a better sister. It was our jealousy that separated us, it was not your fault.”
“But your jealousy wouldn’t have manifested if I were more caring! Nightmare Moon wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for my insensitivity! Let me help you forget all about the moon, forget all about Nightmare. Your life will be so much easier afterwards, I promise!”
Celestia sat with us in silence. The lights were all off, just as we preferred, and although Celestia could not see the pain on our face, we could see how desperate she was to help us.
“I was loved by them, and you were forgotten, hidden away in my shadow. If I had lit the path for you, then you would have been able to prevent what had happened next...Everything is my fault; you were punished for my selfishness. I watched as you descended into the darkest corners of this world and turned into...Her. But I can promise that you’ll never have to think about the past ever again, it’ll be as if none of it ever happened!”
Celestia stared at us, begging us to look her in the eyes, hoping that we would accept what she said.
“It is not necessary for us to forget,” we stated, lowering our eyes. “Forgetting would make it easier to repeat the same mistake...” We saw Celestia smile for a moment in the pervading shadows.
“Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it!” she declared as a large grin grew across her face.
“Even if you did show us the outside, we will not know how to behave...” we continued.
“That will change with time,” she assured.
“But we do not know how to be around other ponies, nor do we know how to talk to them.” we said. “We have grown accustomed to a life of solitude.”
“Is that why you won’t eat dinner with me?” We turned our face away again.
“Old habits are difficult to change, and our habit was born from a thousand years of loneliness. We do not think it will be an easy transition.”
“Nopony said anything about this being easy. What’s valuable is always hard to obtain, and what’s worth having is worth working for.” We grimaced at her words.
“We could never say words as thoughtful as those...” Celestia smiled again.
“Practice makes perfect!” she replied. We rolled our eyes, and she chuckled quietly.
“These are merely words that I have heard in the thousand years you have been gone. They are not mine.”
We felt a little relieved, and almost happy.
“So then, how about I take you out tomorrow for a trip around Equestria? You were banished for a thousand years, but to me it feels like it’s been a thousand and one.” We saw a mischievous grin on her face.
“We -- I must guard the night. I will be tired in the morning.”
“The guards can take over for you,” she suggested. “You can sleep, and then tomorrow we can go see Equestria. It’s changed since the last time we went out together.”
“When will we be back?” we -- I asked her.
“Who knows?” She shrugged.
“I -- I must raise the moon again tomorrow night, remember? And I do not think that I can perform such a task anywhere other than here.” My face was hot, and I could not look her in the eyes. "I am already having troubles with the moon, and if I am not in the castle when I raise it, I fear that it will not rise."
“Well then, we can make it back in time for you to perform your duties,” she sighed. Her voice seemed fragile and disappointed.
“Could...Could you help me...Tia?” I closed my eyes.
I felt a loving warmth embrace me and reach into my heart. Celestia held me in a hug and her hooves were wrapped around me. I felt something cold trickle down my back, and when Tia spoke again, I could hear that she was crying.
“Of course I can!” she replied, elated.
“Th-that way, we can spend more time together...” I fiddled with my hooves as she held us at hoof's length.
“Yes, we can...” she mumbled. Her smile was back, and her eyes were happy again.
“I will need you to guide me, sister. I will need you to help me learn the ways of this new world,” I told her.
“I will always be by your side, Luna,” she insisted. “I will never leave you again!”
She smiled at me, and I smiled back before leaving her grasp and trotting back out onto the balcony. Without a word, Tia followed me and together, we gazed out upon our kingdom. Her eyes were fixed on the houses, but mine were aimed towards the glistening crescent hanging in the night sky. For a thousand years it had been my home, and despite being alone I had always felt content there. I kept thinking about the day I would return, and the everlasting night that would follow, but the silence had been a gift. It had given me time to think, to question the validity of my choices, and even though Nightmare would not admit that we were in the wrong, I did. It is not something that I would volunteer for; it was unimaginably cold and the landscape was soporific, but now, it is something that I think about often. Every night, when the time comes, I have to lift it up into the sky, and no matter how tiring it is, I know that it is worth it. I have never seen anything more beautiful, and I doubt that anything will be able to match its grace and fascination. Tomorrow is the new moon, and it marks a new lunar cycle. I’ll get to watch as the moon grows, night by night in the sky, surrounded by the shimmering stars.
“Tia...” I started, face already red. “Do you think that I will like Equestria?”
“Yes,” she mumbled, wiping her cheeks with a hoof. “You’ll love it!” she cried.
