Some Assembly Required(?)

by AutoPony

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1273

Celestia and Luna meet for a relaxing evening discussion during dinner. But Luna forgot a few things before heading to the dining hall.

Celestia loves her little sis - but family has a way of making it difficult sometimes when very bizarre secrets are unveiled.

Tonight is one of those nights.

There's not much to say about this stupid little thing. I was searching the archives for another greentext I wrote and stumbled back upon this one that I had forgotten about. It purely came about as a result of seeing the cover pic for the first time.

Said cover pic is by Tomatocoup

Published 2024-03-12 06:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-03-12 06:30:01 UTC

Chapter 1

"Good evening, Tia.~"

The surprisingly peppy and enthused voice of Luna brought a smile to Celestia's face before she even looked up from her meal. It had been a long day, and Celestia had been looking forward to a relaxing discussion with her little sister before retiring to her quarters.

This was a daily ritual that had been absent from her life for many moons. While she may have considered it mundane at one point, talking with Luna had become a cherished occasion that she looked forward to every morning and every evening.

"And a belated good evening to you, Lu—"

Celestia was forced to halt the response as her eyes glanced up and caught sight of Luna as she trotted up to the table.

Luna took a seat beside Celestia, flicking her mane back which had lazily draped over part of her face.

A mane that was usually parted by her majestic, spiraled horn - one that was currently absent.

Any respite from the initial shock of seeing Luna sans horn was short-lived, for Celestia's gaze soon shifted downward toward Luna's sides. Just like her alicorn horn, Luna's wings were mysteriously absent, with no hint as to where they would normally be attached.

Moreover - though perhaps not quite as startling - Luna's mane lacked its normal billowing ethereal properties. Instead, it appeared as any normal pony's mane, hanging limply off of her.

"Is everything alright, sister?" Luna asked, her smile vanishing as concern crept into her voice. "You don't look well."

Celestia felt utterly lost. She had no idea how to even begin approaching this bizarre situation.

"Luna, where is... what.."

Wholly unable to form the words she was trying to speak, Celestia resorted to charades, motioning toward her own head with a hoof.

"Something on my face? What is it?" Luna asked, sounding startled as she went cross-eyed in an attempt to see her own muzzle.

Celestia could only stare in disbelief. Surely this had to be a dream, right? But any mental checks she quickly attempted brought her to the same conclusion.

This was real.

Giving up on any further dismissal of the situation as pure fantasy, Celestia raised a hoof up and over her head, tapping her horn.

It only took a moment with that gesture before Luna's hoof began to pat around the offending area of her forehead, identifying the reason for her elder sister's shock.

"Oh dear, I forgot to put on my horn, didn't I?" Luna questioned, blushing with slight embarrassment.

"You... forgot," Celestia repeated in a slow manner, the words feeling odd and foreign as they slipped past her lips.

Luna blushed a little. "Well, when you say it like that, it sounds positively dreadful," she replied with a giggle.

"And your wings?" Celestia added, pointing toward her little sister this time.

Nonchalantly, Luna leaned forward in her seat and craned her neck. She shook her head upon catching sight of her hide, void of the aforementioned appendages.

"I suppose I should have realized if I had forgotten my horn, I probably forgot my wings, too."

"This is fine to you?" Celestia pressed onward.

"Well I usually don't make it past my door before realizing something is missing - I'm having an off day, I suppose. Too many items to be addressed this fine evening."

"And all of this is normal? Removing your..."

"My horn and wings? Of course," Luna interjected, laughing once again at Celestia's reaction. "Don't tell me you actually sleep with yours on, Tia."

Celestia blinked. Was she being set up for a joke? Though neither sister was afraid of a harmless prank in jest upon one another from time to time, Celestia doubted Luna would let such a ploy linger when her elder sister seemed so unnerved.

"That has to be uncomfortable, sister," Luna pressed on with a tsk-tsk. "Why, who knows how long it has been since you've gotten a truly restful sleep."

"Luna..."

"I know, you don't like hearing my lectures on sleep - but it is part of my duty of watching over the dream realm, dear sis—"

"My horn and wings do not come off, Luna!" Celestia finally shouted in exasperation.

As if mimicking her elder sister's expression from a moment ago, Luna stared, frozen in time aside from blinking.

"As in, they don't come off easily...?" she suggested in a tepid and befuddled voice.

"They don't come off at all, Lu," Celestia replied, still unable to believe this was a serious conversation.

"...have you tried?"

"Dearest sister, I assure you that my horn and wings are firmly attached to me," Celestia reaffirmed her position.

"Well, surely you can remove your legs, right? I certainly see no reasonable purpose for it, but-"

As Luna paused mid-sentence, Celestia could only watch in awe and horror as her little sister nipped at one of her forelegs with her teeth. In one swift motion, Luna detached the appendage from her body with a hollow *pop*.

There was no blood, gore or bone to be seen where her leg had been attached just moments ago. No depression or socket to indicate the proper positioning, either. In fact, Luna gave Celestia a little wave with her
disembodied hoof in demonstration that all was seemingly well.

Satisfied with the quick demonstration or unnerved by her sister's continuing dumbfounded and aghast expression, Luna simply set the detached limb back where it should have never left, attaching with an odd muffled *click*.

"It's easier to do with magic, but -" Luna cut short her explanation, preferring to gesture toward her forehead with the leg that was once again a part of her.

"And this... how long has this - er... how long have you been able to do that?" Celestia finally sputtered.

"As long as I can remember. I will say, it was quite concerning the first time I popped off one of my legs," Luna mused with a hum.

At this point, all Celestia could do was sit at the table in utter silence and try to piece together her thoughts into some sort of coherence.

"Must have been a trait I picked up from Mom or Dad, I suppose," she replied dismissively, rising from her seat.

"They couldn't do that either, Luna," Celestia answered back numbly, spurred to conversation by the absurdity of the excuse.

"Are you sure?"

Celestia only nodded.

"But that was a long time ago..."

"Luna, I am absolutely certain I would remember if either our mother or father could do such a thing."

"Huh. Well, I'm not sure from where I received the ability," Luna said with a shrug as she rose to her hooves again. "But I will be right back, I should rectify this problem before I forget - and before too many others see me."

Luna quickly trotted off, leaving the solar princess to just stare off into the distance in silence.

Celestia was at least able to muster up the thought to do one more check. Her golden-hued magic seized the fork she had used for dinner, bringing it to her leg and poking at it with the tines.

There was a slight jolt of pain, but otherwise, nothing changed.

At some point, one of the castle servants came out from the kitchen to place down Luna's meal. He quickly took note of Celestia's stupefied expression.

"Was everything to your liking, your Highness?" he asked, concerned.

Celestia nodded, hardly paying attention to the question.

"Can I get you anything else?"

"...rum, please," Celestia mumbled, almost on pure instinct.

"Of course. Just a shot glass, or perhaps a mixed dr-"

"The bottle."