"Ah yes, my Anti-Friendship-Is-Magic Technique. I haven't used that since the Heian Era."
“Gah!” Twilight grunted as she was blasted through a building for what seemed like to be the hundredth time. Which was pretty strange since she thought Ponyville only had a couple dozen, it was a small town after all. She rolled across the dirt and back to her hooves, she forced herself to stop by digging her hooves in, making four small trenches in the dirt. She finally released her breath and started gasping for air. She finally winced as the pain settled in, she glanced up and saw a small nick on her horn, thankfully, the nick wasn’t too deep, and she could still use her horn. A small bead of sweat rolled down her head as she thought if she hadn’t dodged that slash completely.
“Oof!” A raspy voice cried out and dust kicked up right next to her. Twilight turned to her left and saw her most loyal friend, Rainbow Dash on her back, herself wincing. She groaned and rolled to her hooves.
“Rainbow!” Twilight cried out in concern, “Are you alright?”
Rainbow Dash shook the dirt she had collected on her body off of her, “Yeah, I’m still kicking,” She turned over to Twilight to ask the question back, but her voice died in her throat as she saw the nick on Twilight’s horn. So instead of words coming out, it was a startled yelp.
The Purple Alicorn noticed and shook her head, “Don’t worry, Rainbow, I’m alright,” A small smile made its way onto her face, “Tis but a scratch.” She said, trying to make light of their dire situation.
Before Rainbow Dash could say anything, the rest of their crew landed with them. Pinkie Pie bounced off the ground like a rubber ball and her eyes were looking in separate places before she shook her head to readjust them. Applejack crashed directly into Rainbow Dash who wheezed in pain upon impact. Rarity was just sent tumbling on the ground and skidded to a stop, dirtying her glorious mane. And Fluttershy, well… As Rainbow Dash was getting back up, the pink-maned pegasi knocked her back down.
“Great, now the whole team’s together, now we can die as a happy family,” Rainbow Dash said sarcastically.
“Wee!” Pinkie Pie bounced up and down happily, “We can die together!”
Applejack facehoofed as Fluttershy quivered in fear at the Pink Menace’s joy, “That was sarcasm, Pinkie Pie.”
“What does that taste like?”
“Dag nabbit, Pinkie.”
“MY MANE!” Rarity exclaimed, her voice overflowing with sorrow, standing to her hooves and clutching her mane with tears streaming down her cheeks. “IT’S RUI-HE-HE-HE-HEEENNNDDD!” She wailed, “Just–Just end it now! Oh the horror, the HORROR!”
“Get it together, soldier!” Rainbow Dash slapped Rarity across the face, “The fight isn’t over yet! Don’t give up!” She shook the marshmallow unicorn, continuously slapping her across the face when she ‘wasn’t getting it together’.
“Girls!” Twilight yelled, “Focus! We can win this!”
“H–How? He’s too strong.” Fluttershy said meekly, hiding behind Applejack.
“Like we always have,” Twilight nodded reassuringly before looking into the dust cloud in front of them. Squinting her eyes, she could make out a figure, a figure that would turn more and more slowly recognizable as they made their way out of the cloud of crushed sediment. A man would finally emerge from the cloud of smoke, known as the strongest sorcerer in history, the King of Curses, of Poisons, the Disgraced One, he was…
…Ryomen Sukuna.
The sorcerer would gaze around the wounded group of six who stood before him and crossed one of his pair of arms over his chest, “You six have more grit than the brat,” He remarked as if it was fact. “All of you make good toys...”
Pinkie Pie gave him a wide grin, “Aw, tha–”
“...To break.” He narrowed his eyes dangerously.
“Alright, tough guy!” Rainbow Dash yelled as she puffed out her chest, “That’s enough out of you, I’ll wipe your stupid face off your stupid FACE!” And like that, she took off towards Sukuna who glanced at her with a bored expression.
Rainbow Dash held her hooves out in front of her and prepared to slam into the King of Curses, but he would easily weave out of the way and snatch the Element of Loyalty by the tail. Using momentum, he spun around and slammed her onto the ground, causing the ground beneath them to be cratered. The cyan-pegasi could do nothing but wheeze (again). Sukuna raised his foot high to crush her underneath his weight, but was stopped when Applejack came in to buck him with her hooves.
Sukuna quickly dodged the attack and would dodge several others as Applejack performed a flurry of blows his way. Strategically, he took a few steps back and used one of his eyes to catch Rainbow Dash getting back up to join the fight. He barely paid attention to the farm pony in front of him and focused on what was ahead, spotting Rarity picking up debris with her magic, possibly to throw at him. Catching Pinkie Pie loading her party cannon, Fluttershy cowering, and Twilight struggling to use her magic.
Sukuna smirked, for it was Sukunaing time. He started by decking Applejack in the face and sending her directly at Fluttershy, knocking her over before Twilight could assist with a shield. He then seized Rainbow by the neck and chucked her into the party cannon.
Hole in One!
Appeared comically over the party cannon. When Pinkie Pie tried to fire the party, a large lump would appear on it, which made her tilt her head. Circling around to check what was inside, her eyes widened when the cannon exploded and unleashed cake everywhere. She arose from the pile of cake and on her head would be a limp and groaning Rainbow Dash.
Rarity threw the debris she collected at Sukuna, but he merely used Kai to turn the debris into dust as he made his way past them. As for Twilight? He just unleashed a Kai on all of them and she was forced to create a magical bubble. Even with the shield’s protection, they were knocked back, and Sukuna just casually followed them like this was just another Sunday.
Which it was.
Twilight groaned and dropped the shield around them, she gazed at all of her friends, all beaten and battered. She then finally laid eyes on Sukuna and glared at him, “You may have all the strength in the world, but we have something you don’t!”
Sukuna raised a brow, “Oh?”
“She’s right!” Applejack walked over to stand by Twilight, “We have Honesty!”
“Loyalty!” Rainbow Dash stood by Twilight’s side as well.
As the cyan pegasi said that word, Sukuna immediately said, “Uraume.”
“What’s that? Like, a technique or something?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“No, they’re loyal to me.” Sukuna said flatly.
…
…
…
“Well I bet you don’t have this,” Rainbow Dash gestured to Pinkie Pie.
“Laughter!” The Pink Menace said, taking her side.
“Generosity!” Rarity took Applejack’s side.
“K–Kindness!” Fluttershy bravely declared.
“And magic!” Twilight flared her wings, her eyes beginning to glow white as each and everyone of her friends glowed in a similar light. Starting to take on transformations they achieve when using Rainbow Power. All of them started to glow as they ascended to the sky, rainbows starting the appear around them. “You fight alone–”
“I literally do not.”
“–We fight with our friends!”
“Do you want me to get Big Raga? I’ll show you friendship.”
However, he was ignored, “We have the magic, we have the friendship!” They glowed even brighter, “We have the Magic of Friendship! Because Friendship is Magi–”
Sukuna’s face turned chiseled as if he was carved from stone, "Ah yes, my Anti-Friendship-Is-Magic Technique. I haven't used that since the Heian Era."
Their glowing suddenly stopped as Rainbow Dash gave him a look of confusion, “The Heian-what now?”
“You wouldn’t get it,” Sukuna said with crossed arms.
It took a while for Twilight to register what Sukuna had said, blinking in surprise, “Wait, you have a counter… To our magic?”
“Yes, my Anti-Friendship-Is-Magic Technique.” Sukuna explained, “I used it back in the Heian Era.”
“Yeah, we get ya used it back in the Heian Era, just… How?” Applejack arched a brow.
“I think you can probably tell how, you aren’t that stupid, unless your intelligence is equivalent to that of the brat.”
“And who’s this brat you keep bringing up?!” Rarity asked, a little bit annoyed, “Everytime you compliment us, you just say we’re better than ‘the brat’, what is ‘the brat’?”
“You are asking too many questions.”
“I don’t think so, are we asking too many questions?” Applejack turned over to Fluttershy.
Fluttershy just tilted her head, “U-um, maybe?”
“Hey Suky!” Sukuna moved his gaze over to the Pink Menace, “Are you the strongest because ‘I am you’ or are you the one who left it all behind because you are the strongest?”
…
…
…
“Fuck this,” Sukuna sighed and put his hands together to perform a hand sign, “Ryōiki Tenkai: Fukuma Mizushi.” Before Twilight could even ask a question, Sukuna unleashed an onslaught of Kai on the group of ponies and shredded them into pieces. Turning them into nothing but mists of blood, however, he wasn’t done yet as he opened his hands, revealing his palms to be glowing orange. He spread his arms and unleashed flames that engulfed the destroyed town, melting the destroyed town to ash.
And when the dust settled, he stood inside a crater filled with the burnt surface that was once Ponyville. He let out a sigh of relief, this whole thing was finally–
Pop!
“Well, well, well, what have we here?” Sukuna turned around to see Discord standing across from him. “It’s you! The King of Curses and apparently, the King of killing my FRIENDS!”
Sukuna just stared at Discord and sighed.
“You were amazing, Discord, I’ll never forget you for as long as I live.” Sukuna smiled, looking a little beat up. The Chaos Spirit was dead before him, cut in half, turning Discord into Disc/ord. Sukuna turned away from the Chaos Spirit’s corpse and gazed around at the crater that was once Ponyville.
He had defeated Equestria’s finest warriors.
He had won.
“Hey, Sukuna, that was pretty fun, huh?” Twilight giggled and punched Sukuna lightly on the shoulder, the sorcerer smiled and punched her lightly back.
“It sure was! But why do I always have to play the bad guy?” He asked humorously as Discord put himself back together and Ponyville was restored, and everyone appeared to be unharmed.
“Well, that’s because you’re just so good at it, Suky!” Grinned Pinkie Pie, Sukuna grinned as she hugged his neck from behind him, forcing him to give her a piggyback ride.
Discord walked over and put a hand on Sukuna’s shoulder, and the King of Curses wrapped one of his arms around the Chaos Spirit’s neck and pulled Twilight in for a hug. Soon, the entire group was pulled into a big hug.
Sukuna smiled, “This truly was a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.”
And so, Sukuna became a teacher at the School of Friendship, and everyone lived happily ever after.
Author's Note
Stand proud, reader, you can read.
